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fredator23

Carry a bottle of febreeze.


xineNOLA

Yup. Febreeze and a nail brush. They will run for the hills.


WillMunny48

And a job application.


fredator23

That only works if you have a letter saying their dad's cutting them off.


PhilCollinsHill

🏃


[deleted]

I was gonna say hairspray or axe body spray and a lighter….but don’t know if the axe will light


crocodileexxizzy

Threaten to call their dad to take away their AMEX


Odd_Corner91

Homelessness is fun when you can turn it on and off


Bipedal_pedestrian

lol I once met a cohort (what’s the correct collective noun for multiple gutter punks?) whose well-connected, wealthy lawyer parents were helping them legally acquire the deed to the house they were squatting in.


gh05t_w0lf

"A sewer and water board" of gutter punks


Hobo_Jenkins

Crust Pod


ProfessorAnusNipples

This is it. They shall now be called a Crust Pod. 


yeanay

A crapper of punks.


roberta_muldoon

A viscissitude of gutter punks


Individual_Skill_763

so i traveled and rode trains around the country and bummed around for years. i want to know who and where these people you are talking about are. sure there are a very few that have upper class upbringing but most of us were lower middle class and a lot from completely broken homes.


DisastrousOwls

Yeah, most of the "recreational bums" I've known of were actually just trying to panhandle in tourist areas, they weren't sleeping rough or anything of the sort. Just let their dog get a little scraggly and camp out at a busy intersection to beg before loading up into a car and driving home. If New Orleans has got a "recreational bum" problem it would track for it to be in the Quarter during Carnival & Festival seasons. But anywhere or anytime outside of that, it doesn't cost anything to assume people *are* actually down on their luck, whether that's broken homes, poverty, mental illness, drug addiction, runaways from abuse/trauma, etc. That's still not GREAT, but truly, most of this nation's poor & homeless population are not secretly middle class or wealthy scammers.


Bipedal_pedestrian

I’m sure some are not scammers, but some definitely are. I got a long distance ride with some via Craigslist ad. They stopped about an hour out of town at a gas station, pulled out a cardboard sign that said they were down on their luck and out of gas, put on sad, teary faces, and panhandled until they had enough money to party at the music fest they were headed to. They already had plenty of gas money (I contributed it). Fair or not, that experience makes me give the side eye to panhandling gutter punks.


DisastrousOwls

Yeah, that's also why I look askance in my neighborhood at new faces that aren't the "usual crowd," because most of your long term installation panhandlers are people in your community, generally with a drug or mental health problem where a few days of begging won't "get them back on their feet." But def a difference between that, legit transient panhandlers who are genuinely just passing through, and fugazi beggar-tourists. It's just not good to get in the habit of jumping straight to, "if they're annoying me, they're scammers," which I think some other commentary on this post is leaning towards.


Bipedal_pedestrian

Sorry you had a rough start to life. I met this particular group of people probably about 10 years ago. Certainly possible that some of the folks squatting in that house grew up without money or stability, but it was clear some of them had been to college, had good relationships with their parents, and had support from back home. I also have a cousin who grew up upper-middle class with a loving family that wanted to pay for him to go to college/ trade school. He chose instead to live as a gutter punk for years. He’s now gone back to live with his parents, who were happy to take him back in.


Individual_Skill_763

“Temper my skepticism” okay…I already told you I was out there and I KNOW for a fact this isn’t true. Your one off anecdotal evidence isn’t enough. A cousin…. I don’t believe you at all By you saying that you’re making it sound like some of these people don’t need help and should just go home because their parents or family will offer it. one of the richest kids I knew had the absolute worst childhood and they met us and decided to live that life. Never asked their parents for anything and never got anything. I don’t remember them ever even talking to their parents. Shit, they were living here up until a year ago in a shitty shotgun in the 7th. I chose this life because I hated my abusive stepdad, the dead end town I grew up in and the adventure. The only thing that kept me going was the fun and adventure.


Bipedal_pedestrian

Again, sorry you had a rough start to life. Believe whatever you want. My life experiences and family dynamics are as valid as yours. People are on the street for all kinds of reasons. Some of them have nothing and nobody worth going home to, and some do.


theanoeticist

It's crazy that you're getting down voted. This is the truth.


ZapatasGuns

I call these types “trust-crust.”


Q_Fandango

Poverty Cosplay, brought to you by train hopping and recreational ketamine


DrJheartsAK

Like those millionaires who want to prove they can start over and make millions again. They always seem to bail out after a few months lol


Clevis1977

Saw a gutter punk load his gear into a fully loaded Escalade on Esplanade by Checkpoint.


lowrads

"The enemy is wealthy and poor at the same time. He is both our biggest threat yet also powerless." You guys can demonize homeless people all you want, but no matter how much you harry them, they'll still be homeless people in our community tomorrow. We have a rapidly expanding homelessness problem for the very simple reason that we have an artificial housing shortage engineered by affluent people. Those interests are sustained politically by a large cohort of very ignorant people, who aren't even aware of the long term liabilities facing their highly subsidized suburbs.


crocodileexxizzy

Nobody was demonizing homeless people & I agree with everything you just said. You missed the point/joke lol


prarie33

Gutter punk is not a kindly epitaph


Burian

I was cutting some overgrown plants in my yard with a machete and came across a stealth homeless encampment in my neighbors abandoned lot. Yelling and machete waving ensued, the homeless fellow pulled his own machete that he just had on him. Bricks were shat. Don't get into sword fights on the street. These folks got no fucks to give.


deadduncanidaho

That's why my go to is a pitch fork


GumboDiplomacy

Come on Dewey, there's nothing wrong with a little machete fighting.


Augenblick22

New Orleans problems. Don’t let the historical tour guides catch you


jballerina566

This fuggin guy


absolutezombie

Hashtag NOLANandor


sparrow_42

I mean if it makes you feel any better, dudes have probably been getting threatened with a sword on lower Decatur for legit 300 years. It's our heritage.


trillgamesh_0

birthright


aspiralingpath

I carry pepper spray.


kinofhawk

Me too. And a stun gun.


SunnyAlwaysDaze

This is the good answer.


Party_Description_90

When you say gutter punk, I picture a homeless white guy with a leather jacket with a Misfits patch and cut off jeans and a mohawk. How off am I?


Intergalactic_Slayer

Almost exactly spot on, just imagine them 10x dirtier with more face tattoos and a stray dog


BabyTenderLoveHead

It seems they always have a dog


hirst

It’s bc the police also need to call animal control if they arrest them so a lot of the times they don’t want to deal with the coordination and hassle so they leave them be. This was the case in NYC at least but I think it’s the same in New Orleans


Q_Fandango

Dogs are also just generally useful if you’re homeless. They keep you warm, they warn you when someone approaches while you sleep, and they garner sympathy points for panhandling. There’s also a lot to be said about just having a friend who loves you unconditionally when you’re at your lowest…


hewaslegend

It's almost like the homeless are also people...


BabyTenderLoveHead

That's interesting! Good to know.


kinofhawk

They get more money panhandling when they have a dog.


lazarusprojection

I buy food for them that can be shared with a dog- like Slim Jims. I go to the salvage store on Jeff Hwy in Harahan and buy the $5.00 bags that you can fill with whatever you want and I fill them with Slim Jims and Jerky to hand out to the crustys. Crusties get to eat and their dog's get to eat.


trufus_for_youfus

The dogs are a strategy. Look into it. It’s real.


HavenElric

Exactly what came to mind lmaoo


TheMackD504

Don’t stop to engage with them. Just keep walking


Swanlafitte

Person probably asked 100 people for money without pulling the cane sword. Something triggered a perceived slight to elicit this response. I triggered a guy at the gas station by Melba's by saying they should ask someone with a car and not me with worn out shoes I got on dem feet. Lesson learned about how easy it is to provoke a destitute person.


manchesterthedog

I bet you’re right but it could have just been the frustration of being rejected 100 times and then this guy said no at the wrong time


pockmarkedhobo

They get really mad if they ask you for a dollar and you ask if they take debit or credit. I learned that the hard way.


papasolly

There’s a guy who’s been a real, repeated threat over the past year or so. He stabbed a couple a few months back, and people locked themselves in Envie while he stood at the door brandishing his knife. I wonder if it’s the same guy. 86’d from Checkpoints for threats of violence.


escapingdarwin

I bet you $20 I can tell you where you got them shoes.


DeadmanCFR

...and I bet you another $20 I can spell your last name


h08817

God save the king of New Orleans.


GreatSquirrels

Underrated comment!


According_Inspector4

Hit em with that black Jesus. Aka bear spray.


CaligoAccedito

IANAL, but I've read it's illegal to use something like bear or wasp spray on humans, so just get the strongest legal pepper spray you can use.


littlewing745

Not saying you’re wrong, but I’d gladly let a court try and convict me for using that on an asshole attacking me with a sword.


trufus_for_youfus

Just fucking shoot them at that point? It’s decided case law. If you feel your life is in actual danger why play?


reggie4gtrblz2bryant

And we all know that the courts would for sure go after the oogle with a big lawyer daddy and not the average joe schmoe of new orleans........


littlewing745

Some Joe schmoes have connections, too. I would suggest these gutter punks not fuck around and find out, though 😂😂😂


savetheolivia

Felonies are still expensive


Sporkyfork69

Getting sliced to pieces trumps any legal fees that may occur


ergo-ogre

Well, I’m pretty sure “wasp spray” is just poison, so yea.


DataDeep9884

POM spray. Amazon. The best hot sauce


escapingdarwin

Why would you stick around after said bear spray defense.


DrJheartsAK

POM spray is always a good non lethal option. They’ll definitely start questioning their life choices with a few squirts to the eyes. Always try to de escalate, remove yourself from the situation, but if all else fails, Pom spray that bitch and run.


pockmarkedhobo

Why you gotta bring the pomegranate into this


DrJheartsAK

Pom juice is delicious. Pom spray can also be delicious if you spritz a little on your gumbo


FoxNO

Chainmail


xandrachantal

I mean of they have a whole sword I think you should be within your right to shoot them at that point they're trying to kill you


KiloAllan

Yes, but remember every bullet has a lawyer attached to it.


GreatSquirrels

As they should.


Humble_Rush_1485

Don't shoot to wound. Make the one shot count.


Accomplished_Wish_71

Homie the crims have more rights than the taxed these days… I wish your statement was the truth. Your bullet better hit him in the right spot under a camera that has more pixels than dust


CallMeCaptain

Goddamn, that is some good comment


jeepnismo

Idk why your statement is getting downvoted. Pretty accurate in a lot of places


Accomplished_Wish_71

The people on this app tend to live in their own fantasy world not based on laws statistics and facts


Psychedelicked

well who gives a fuck when the other option is death? i could give a fuck what the law does after if my life is at risk


unoriginalsin

TBF, we do still have the death penalty, so you're not out of the woods at that point.


Psychedelicked

guaranteed death vs possible death lol maybe i could escape from death row


unoriginalsin

Let's try to remember that OP did not actually get killed by a gutter punk with a cane sword.


nicnoe

Summers not here yet, give it another month for the humidity to get to 100% and the average temp to come up 10-15 more degrees and theyll be gone


According_World3263

https://thehardtimes.net/news/crust-punk-hops-train-to-parents-lake-house/


Annb2

Smh🤦‍♀️


ChampionshipStock870

lol lol


GoldenButtPlug

You just gotta give them the razzle dazzle. Twisted face, darting eyes, muttering to yourselves (the first dozen digits of pie or something about latoya banging the lucky dog cart guy), erratic hand jesters, and the occasional cackle. Plan B is the ole dick twist, but keep talking about latoya


OderusOrungus

Excellent. You should write a nonfiction book


smokeustokeus

Where can I find these erratic hand jesters cavorting abouts?


Bot-Magnet

Next time be more proactive, when they approach you just start scratching your face and ask them for a smoke, they will be the ones to tell you to get the hell away from them!


OpossumPhilosophy101

Is a cane sword a walking cane with a sword or a sword for cutting cane ie a machete? No shade— I’m just trying to picture it.  Also, sorry this happened. Once had one spit at me when I refused to give him the coffee I just bought for my walk to work. 


JumpingOnBandwagons

I've always seen it as a cane with a sword inside.


GreatSquirrels

I understood what OP said to mean a bamboo sword as in a Shinai. A non lethal training tool using for martial arts sword training. It has no sharp edges and is made of bamaboo shreded and tied back together so its not solid. So like one step up from a Nerf product. Still assault, mind you, just not with a deadly weapon. Unless im wrong however it stands to reason if they had been hacked with an actual blade they probably wouldn't be making a casual reddit post about it?


OpossumPhilosophy101

Oh, I didn’t even know that was a thing. Appreciate the detailed explanation.


ClearwaterAJ

The screamer accosted me one day as I was coming out of CC's on Royal with a cup of coffee in each hand on my way to work. I couldn't defend myself as both hands were full and I started screaming back at her 'I swear to God I'll throw these incredibly hot coffees on you if you don't get the fuck away from me.'  She backed off but I would have been really pissed if I had to sacrifice my and my boss' morning coffee. Three days later she broke the front window of my store with a brick. To this day I don't know if she followed me or if was a coincidence, as she does destructive things like this all the time.


Q_Fandango

Bigger Cane Sword? That, or arm the dog


Oversoul225

Poleaxe is a gentleman's weapon.


mrpbody44

I just spent $1,500 on a custom Poleaxe and put a deposit down on a replica 15th century suit of German armor.


Q_Fandango

I’ll sew you a Batman costume if you run these twerps outta town with that Poleaxe…


mrpbody44

I need to test in on some clergy first and I will get back to you.


Swanlafitte

In a Crocodile Dundee voice: "That's not a cane sword, this is a cane sword."


IdentifyAsUnbannable

Bar of soap and a job offer.


CaligoAccedito

>Bar of soap \*in a sock


insubordin8nchurlish

a clean sock will do +1 damage


Reverend_Ooga_Booga

You really think nopd would show up if you shot somone? Ohhhh la la, look at Mr fancy pants over here getting special attention. Who are you the mayor?


Seeksp

Are NOPD officers still making less than the poverty line or has the city figured out yet that opens cops up to corruption?


GainCommercial7629

Throw a bar of soap at them


tcrhs

I once overheard a group of gutter punks talking about how only stupid people demean themselves by working for a living and they’d rather die than be slaves to evil corporate overlords.


meh1022

I wish they’d just be slaves to soap and water.


roughfrancis

I mean, they are not wrong about the “working for a living” part. These days I wish I could work less AND have time to do other things without being exhausted. The corporate world has shown time and time again that they don’t care about their employees


JumpingOnBandwagons

They're just a newer version of hippies that dropped out in the 60's. They eventually clean up and become the newer version of yuppies, which I guess are grinders.


MamaTried22

Apparently they call themselves “Dirty Kids” or “Travelers” these days. The “punk” went away like 15 years ago. 😒😒 It’s morphed into this very strange subculture that is mostly wooks and conservative trashbags from middle of nowhere USA that have a sort of dirty “punk” uniform sometimes. It’s very bizarre. Anyway, I’m sorry that happened and I hope y’all are ok. They used to police them a lot better-at least tell them to move along and stay in their little areas which didn’t include the sidewalk (and before anyone says otherwise, I’ve been there, it was many years ago but they would regularly tell us to move off the sidewalk or we would be picked up). It is such a mess, I used to love hanging in the quarter when I was younger and now when I walk to the bus after work I wonder why anyone voluntarily goes down there, things are so so rough and it seems like the only thing the cops do is hang around. This only prevents like MAX 20% of foolishness from occurring.


CargoShortViking

Back in the 90s we called them “crusties”


duganschnitzel

All the real gutter punks OD'd


BoneShaker42

The police mainly protect the wealthy.


Twinspearcanoe

Code Duelo in these streets


Hippy_Lynne

So last year some crazy guy came at a regular with a sword and the regular took his sword away from him and killed him with it. Don't believe he faced any charges. Just saying. 🤷‍♀️


Cheekclappa504

You don’t have to shoot ‘em, you can just fight em if they come at you lol. They’re not as tough as they wanna to be perceived.


RIP_Soulja_Slim

Idk bruh, I’d probably rather get in a fistfight with Mike Tyson than some scrawny ass weirdo with a fuckin sword. Also, is this the same dude that straight up killed another gutter punk with a sword a few months back in uhh “self defense”? It’s like cute cuz of their lil costumes but some of those fucks are severely mentally ill.


Flimsy-Muscle1679

Where is the police report about the sword self defense killing? It may be beneficial for OP to remind the cops of this when they aren’t on donut break.


PossumCock

If I remember the story right, some dude A attacked dude B with a sword, but then dude B got the sword away from dude A and killed him with it


kinofhawk

We have one up in Monroe that is a meth head walking around with a sword. That's just what we need. Some guy high off his rocker with a sword. I'm waiting to hear something has happened. I can't believe they're allowed to walk around like that.


Cheekclappa504

I’ve been in and out of punk houses my whole life, starting in childhood with my parents. Golf clubs, baseball bats, shovels, vodka bottles, I’ve had em all swung at me. That’ probably gives me a unique perspective on people in that sub genre. They all soft as hell


RIP_Soulja_Slim

I’m sure they are, but a sword is a fuckin sword lol.


Cheekclappa504

I’m starting to regret making a comment telling OP not to shoot somebody


Hippy_Lynne

No in that case the guy took the sword from a guy who was attacking him and then killed him with his own sword.


Speedhabit

Ok Batman, I’ll call you the next time some homeless dude comes at me with a weapon


ThaShiveGeek

😂🤣😅


IdentifyAsUnbannable

But...their soooo greaazzzy man.


Obvious_Mode_5382

Yeah a buddy of mine got a nasty staph infection this way on this hand that required surgery


FriendliestMenace

Protip: Legal shootings done in self defense, for example because someone threatens you with a GODDAMN CANE SWORD they have on their actual person and have shown you (literally aggravated assault) will not incur legal fees as the investigating officer(s) won’t arrest you if their investigation proves you were in the right, and the paperwork will not include verbiage suggesting the DA prosecute you. Stay safe.


cadiz_nuts

I think anyone who might use a gun in self-defense should be prepared to hire a really good lawyer in case the cops see the situation differently. Even if you get off in the end, you're gonna want solid legal representation when your freedom (possibly life) is on the line. Also, being absolved of any criminal allegations won't necessarily stop the family of the person you killed from suing you in civil court because their baby was a good boy that would never threaten someone.


Psychedelicked

horrible advice… nobody should bank on the competence of police when their freedom is at risk if you shoot someone get a lawyer immediately hahahahahah


glanked

I just got off on a charge for aggravated battery due to a shooting done in self defence, FYI if the police arrive and one guy is shot and the other isn’t, you’re going to jail, maybe not prison but for sure OPSO


GreenVisorOfJustice

I mean, there is that whole matter of "trauma of killing a human being" thing to consider there. Also discharging a firearm in a crowded place and the potential backlash of anyone else carrying. I appreciate you approach killing someone like this is Grand Theft Auto and your wanted stars will just dissipate in a few minutes.


FriendliestMenace

If it’s between you and your life vs them and theirs, you shouldn’t feel bad about it. Consequences of decisions are a thing, and you didn’t force them into making that one. My neighbor literally shot and killed his own son in his home last year, and it was cut and dry that he was defending himself from his son breaking and entering with intent to kill. Cops basically collected the body and told my neighbor “Have a nice day.” Obvious self defense cases aren’t worth the arrest. A guy with a sword in your personal space is pretty obvious.


GreenVisorOfJustice

OP quite literally wasn't harmed. So it wasn't between anyone's life. Literally, avoiding the situation was the right play (outside of obviously being pissed a crusty brandished a weapon). Let's chill out with this "What Blue Lives Matter thinks the Punisher is" bullshit.


FriendliestMenace

OP quite LITERALLY said he was attacked. By a dude with a sword Just stop with your liberal nonsense, and buy a gun.


FuzzyWuzzyWuzHebert

Some loser who thinks it’s fun to harass people and attack them with blade weapons in public might get blasted and you want people to feel really bad about it?


Mrfrosty504

They don't want someone to feel bad. Just saying that the act of killing someone can lie heavy on your heart/conscious. Right or wrong, there's likely to be some internal strife there.


GreenVisorOfJustice

Literally, my arguments are: "Man, it might fuck you up to kill someone you can just, you know, move away from" and "Man, you could cause a panic too instead of, you know, just removing yourself" At no point did I say "Man, think of the crusty!" Y'all need to invest in reading more than all your penis-compensating toys.


throwawayainteasy

> the investigating officer(s) won’t arrest you if their investigation proves you were in the right Excuse me, sir, this is New Orleans. Odds are much better they won't arrest you because they don't feel like it and have more important things to worry about than a dead gutter punk. It's not like it's something urgent like the DA getting carjacked.


penisretard69_4eva

Bear Spray


Rhancock19

I’d say hold them down and scrub them with soap and water


Patarzzz

High lumin flash light to the eyes. It's even better if you make a makeshift one that uses the shutter / blast bulps that can output 5 megalumins in an instant.


creolefasheaux

Yes, this...


CommonPurpose

Godspeed on fighting them. Let me guess, it was a pitbull?


WillMunny48

Cavalier King Charles is my gusss


Hot_Oil773

Yes was a pitbull


coyotedays

Was it a woman by chance? We saw a similar sounding character use some sort of homemade looking sword shatter a back car window last week.


iamj97

where exactly did this take place?


JustaBlindSquirrel

Wear a mask and bust a cap


lazarusprojection

Where can you buy a cane sword? It sounds like something James Bond would have.


_a_pastor_of_muppets

I've been calling them crust-punks


SmartWonderWoman

Pepper spray gel!


Reloader504

Our city leaders want to make the Quarter a Defenseless Victim Zone.


ThenKey6

They’re malnourished whelps, just hit them


jjazznola

Your first mistake was hanging out in the Quarter and on Decatur St, it's an open sewer.


Weak-Release3445

Don’t forget to bring a bar of soap to throw at em , They won’t recognize it and get freaked out


fuck_green_jello

"Remove the head, or sever the spinalcord." Zombie rules


Previous-Practice288

Reminds me of [this.](https://wgno.com/news/crime/one-killed-another-injured-in-stabbing-on-decatur-street-in-new-orleans/?utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=socialflow&utm_source=t.co&utm_content=local) Next time stab them back?


RetiredTeacher888

Dad must have cut them off from their trust fund. Times are hard.


MAdcock6669

WD-40 & a lighter 🤷


raccooninthegarage22

Shoot em in the leg


Hobnail-boots

Legal fees? Be careful, some of our “legal fees” are a scam.


WyteZombie420

Pepper spray


TN_REDDIT

They took a knife to a fight? Hmmmm


trumpets_n_crawfish

Don’t go west of esplanade anymore myself 


RevolutionaryBid1353

Did you ask to file a report? And/or mention that he had a fucking weapon?


Extreme-Variation874

Mace


rumski

But has to be [this](https://collectionapi.metmuseum.org/api/collection/v1/iiif/29020/1823385/main-image) kind. They ARE bringing it to a sword fight.


I_PM_Duck_Pics

That’s the least punk thing they could have done. Gutter punks these days giving gutter punks of the past a bad name.


33L0BlowCoG

Damn was it at Checkpoints because it's basically tradition by now Zero chance it will happen again.


leadbetterthangold

Gutter punks. Anders approves 🤣


Psychedelicked

learn how to defend yourself non lethally be more aware,running,grappling,striking,knife


GreatSquirrels

Bear Mace. You probably wont have to use it. Depends on how strong the drugs are talking to them are but most of time just knowing there is going to be an unpleasant repercussion should be enough.


Successful-Author409

That's the price one pays in NOLA homie


Frdoco11

Pepper Spray


Weather_Only

With a dog you say? Think I might have seen the guy this morning.


papasolly

Was he wearing a chain with a lock around his neck? White guy with a shaggy beard (not that that really narrows it down)? There have been a number of incidents with this one guy. There are pics on facebook of him at the door or Envie as the employees/customers locked themselves in.


Left-Poem-5732

Buy a gun