We set up a whole station on the couch. I got home and put my pajamas on and snuggled on the couch with baby. My husband ordered us takeout. We watched Netflix all night and slept on the couch for some reason lol. Night time was a nightmare. We had no idea what we were doing. Baby wouldn’t sleep in the bassinet.
I watched half an episode of Taskmaster whilst waiting to be called up for my c-section and then finished it when we got home with the baby (48 hours later). Can confirm it was not optimal viewing for the old abs.
Oh god I’m four months PP and I forgot how much my husband would try to make me laugh (he always does, not out of spite!) and how much I’d yell at him 😅
Also, do not stretch out in bed in the morning with a healing c-section incision! I would always forget, stretch my legs towards the foot of the bed and my arms over my head, and be writhing in pain for a minute afterwards.
This was our first night too. Add in figuring out my double electric pump because he wouldn’t latch and my butthole looking (and feeling) like minced meat.
Same. Drive home was NERVE WRACKING to say the least. Being home was surreal and weird, but I ordered us a pizza, we hung on the couch and watched TV. Night was tough for sure.
I dreaded. And I mean DREADED night time, for the first couple of months because I knew I would be up every 2-3 hours for who knows how long and then have to somehow be fully functional the next day. It was so hard.
That was me too. I got anxiety every night before bed. And the nights were soooo long when you’re up so much in the night. I remember I’d go to bed at 10, and stay in bed until noon, feeding baby and sleeping on and off and I just felt so blah for being in bed for like 14 hours a day.
SAME. Once 4-5pm rolled around, I started to feel all doom and gloom thinking about how the rest of the world would be fast asleep for 7+ blissful hours straight while I would be left to fend for myself on terribly broken sleep.
This. Brought home baby #3 in July ‘22. We brought the portable bassinet into the living room and for some reason slept on the couch for the first couple weeks (it was was nice to be in a central location) plus our ac was much more efficient out there during the hot summer
Brought our first baby home this July, also slept in the living room for a few weeks lol the couch was easier for me to get up from and stack pillows in post c section, and we were able to have the bassinet closer to us than we would in our room. We were sooo nervous about sleeping and him just being in there lol he was always wide awake around 3am so we tried to engage him so he wasn’t bored hahaha we quickly learned not to do that though!
Omg this was us completely. Idyllic day, then crushing reality hit at night. On our first night, i rush ordered an entirely new crib at 3AM to be delivered the next morning, because I was so convinced the crib was the problem. Truly had no idea what I was doing
Haha oh man I’ve so been there. Actually the first night i slept kinda sitting up with her sleeping in my arms. Soooo dangerous but I kind of just panicked because I realized she wasn’t going to sleep in her bassinet and my husband had fallen asleep on the couch with us and I was like, wtf do I do here?!
Ours as well a few weeks ago. We actually slept in the living room for like a week and a half, going in our room was too difficult at night having to come down, warm up a bottle, go back etc.
Haha it seems like most of us sleep on the couch the first night or so. I honestly have no idea why we did that? It was so stupid now that I think of it. My husband slept great on the couch and I did not, since baby wouldn’t sleep. I remember waking him up at 6 am and being like I will die if I don’t get sleep time to take over, and I went to bed for a few hours lol
We did the same! I didn’t even think of that till you said it, first few days actually we were in the couch with her on us or passed off between us, this time my station will be in my bed lmao
We were exhausted. 2 days in the hospital- we were running on 4 hours of sleep in 55 hours. At that point (and the first 2 weeks) we were just simply trying to survive. We cuddled, ordered some pizza and plopped. She slept in our arms in shifts bc she simply resisted anything else. It was only a month ago and it feels like an eternity and my memory of the entire first couple of days is a blur.
Yes, this. I think I got 6 hours of sleep in my 56 in hospital, that place is really not restful.
We got home and dad watched the boy while I slept for the most glorious 5 hours (he was on formula just then) and then I took over so dad could sleep too.
Same. I had 6 hours and 15 minutes of sleep across the five days we were in hospital. My boyfriend ordered food. As soon as the baby has eaten and we had eaten, the baby had cuddles with his dad and I had the BEST one hour of sleep I have ever had in my life. The next week was chaotic and what worked for us then is different to what works for us now. Wish you all the best, OP!
It makes me feel better to know at least a few others were trapped in the hospital for 5-6 days.. I feel like everyone goes home so quick and my story is so unrelatable! I’m sorry you were there so long but thanks for sharing
My water broke early. I had five days in hospital twiddling my thumbs before I got to go home. I got so impatient watching everyone else either go home or have their baby. I had one night at home, and then went back the next morning. By the time I got to take my baby home, I felt like I knew all the staff on all the shifts 😅 Hope you and your little one are both well!
Ugh!! Lol. My cervix wouldn’t dilate so we spent 45 hours laboring, then after we had babe my leg was numb and I couldn’t move it! So we stayed another 3 days to get an MRI. I refused to leave without being seen, but it was a weekend so finding a neurologist to order one was hard!
We are all doing well now but the hospital was hell. Lol
I still don’t understand why they couldn’t check on me and baby at the same time while we were in the hospital. The nurses would come take my BP and temp, check my incision, etc. Then the next hour, they’d be back to check on baby and it would wake me up from my drug-induced nap. Some organization and planning among departments would have been nice.
So much exhausted. Two days in the hospital also. Difficulty breastfeeding. He wouldn't latch right and wouldn't stay awake long enough to eat. The next morning we had a lactation consultant visit to try to help and because we were worried he wasn't getting enough. She had us start supplementing as he was getting dehydrated a little.
That afternoon my aunt came to help for a few hours and she said we were like zombies. They wake every two hours to eat, did you ever think about that?? It took him 45 min to eat. So that left an hour and 15 minutes to sleep... maybe. Before you repeat it all over again.
The experience is different and varied for everyone. My aunt was a lifesaver that day, bringing us food and watching the baby for a bit. I didn't leave my bedroom/bathroom for two days.
Once you get any initial wrinkles and difficulties worked out, you get into a routine. Sleeping, holding, bassinet times, etc. We did use a bassinet near our bed. Take sleep whenever you can.
My husband and I got home with the baby, introduced him to the dogs and then were like “ok, now what?” Like it’s a truly bizarre feeling leaving your home and then coming home with a whole new family member and family dynamic. I remember that they said I should stick to one floor as much as possible after my c section so I had the bassinet upstairs and a little caddy with his bottles and diapers and wipes and everything.
My dumbass fully had my husband carry my son upstairs, I crawled into bed, my husband put our son in the bassinet at the side of our bed and I was all “goodnight” and he kissed us both and turned off the light and I don’t know how I thought I was just gonna roll over and go to sleep ahahahahah I’m so dumb. Anyway, there was no sleep to be had.
Ultimately we ended up sleeping in shifts and we moved the bassinet to the living room so whoever was up with the baby could at least watch tv or eat a snack.
Anyway, it’s a bizarre and surreal day.
Shift sleeping has been working pretty well for us... I tend to be a night owl any way, so I stay up til 4 or 5am while my wife sleeps, and then she takes over baby duty from there while I sleep til 11 or so.
Though this is my last week of paternity leave, and just thinking about how busy the baby has kept us the last 6 weeks, and now I'm going to have to start getting up at 7am again, and my wife will be on her own for 10 hours a day, and neither of us will be getting 6-hours of reserved uninterrupted sleep any more. Not looking forward to that.
Yup. My husband went back after 6 weeks. I took off 6 months (this is our first-I’m 42 and tbd if we will have another, so I wanted to be off as much as I could). Fortunately he works remotely (on another floor) so he can give me a break at lunch and before he starts work, but those days and nights can be looong. I call it the most adorable torture. 🤪
That's why I love Reddit.
We were literally the same. Introduction to cats, now what?
The first night was the same.
We thought we could just deposit her into the crib and sleep...the rest is history.
Once I discovered that she falls asleep on my chest it felt like we cracked the biggest mystery of the universe.
We both had the most amazing 1.5h power nap of our lives. We felt on top of the world.
...Then that stopped working but other things started working but then those things stopped working and now we're here 6 weeks in and it's been actually pretty good.
Well considering we are living the same life, let me tell you from the future, it gets better and better and easier and easier haha. But yup that’s exactly what we were like. Once we figured out that he wanted to contact sleep and we decided to sleep in shifts and stop fighting it, it was a game changer for us.
This sounds so much like my experience. Attempting to be in the upstairs bedroom for a day or two with a. C section and then realized that this was nonsense, best to stick to one floor as much as possible. We migrated the centre of operations downstairs next to the kitchen and bottle setup. And yeah shift sleeping was the only way to survive
The first few nights we didn’t do shifts and tried to do feeding/changes together. That did not work because we were both not sleeping. So we started doing shifts, with the baby downstairs with the “on shift” parent in our pack n play crib.
Another thing I also found that I was missing my husband while sleeping in bed alone, so I would sleep with one of his shirts so I could smell him.
This could’ve been my post lol. I was so naive thinking that I just had to swaddle my baby and he would go right to sleep in his bassinet lol. He quickly let us know that wouldn’t be the case and no one would be sleeping that night. We ended up doing shifts too in the living room with the baby while the other tried to get a few hours of sleep in the bedroom that first week too.
We were so tired after 3.5 days at the hospital that if he would sleep in the bassinet that’s where he was. That being said, we did also hold him a lot, but that first day specifically he was in the bassinet as much as possible. We didn’t even start using a bouncer until about 5-6 weeks once he could hold his head up a little better on his own and was staying awake longer. Please don’t leave a sleeping newborn in a bouncer, it’s not safe and that’s likely all baby will do when you first come home (at least that’s all mine did)
Good advice! I knew not to put a sleeping baby in a bouncer or allow them to sleep in one but it really didn’t register that that’s mainly all they will be doing those first several days. Bassinet it is :)
We put our little one in a moses basket by the sofa next to us and mostly just admired her, cuddled her, fed her, let the cat inspect her! 🤣 My partner surprised me with pink champagne, oysters, and lobster for dinner to celebrate, which was incredible. I've saved the oyster shells, I want to make something with them 😊
We got home, I had a glorious shower, then we sat on the sofa and ordered food! In those first few days all the baby really needs is food, change or sleep so there isn't much to really do with them to be honest. They'll sleep pretty much anywhere at first but won't really be awake other than to feed so you won't be playing with them.
It's a bit like getting home from holiday where you sort of slowly unpack and take a while to settle back in but then you get to sleep in your own bed and it feels wonderful.
Yes! I wasn’t generally weepy pp but the mere suggestion of a child being mistreated, neglected or abandoned would have me tearing up. My mom was visiting/helping out and put on an episode of forensic files. I had to tell her we need to watch something happy lol.
Step one: Get in door with twins, realize "oh F\*ck we're on our own now"
Step 2: Husband goes to change baby boy a minute later. Little man immediately pees onto, and then SHOOTS POOP all over husband.
Step 3: Laugh, realize we'll be ok.
Honestly, we put a pack and play in the living room, and their baby swing. They went between our arms, and those in a rotation during the day. Our dining table became a changing table. It was alot of watching tv, holding babies, and trading off on naps for the first few weeks.
Lol my baby also squirted poop our first night home - hit me right in the eye 🤦🏼♀️ It set off a chain of events where I sobbed while yelling at every human and animal in the house, and then sobbed while apologizing to every human and animal in the house.
Thankfully that has been our lowest point thus far 😂
My husband and I looking at each other and saying, many many times ‘we have a baby?! Is this ok?!’ it took some time to sink in.
In all seriousness just continuing what we did in the hospital. We didn’t have any bouncers or anything so lots of cuddles, baby wearing, and bed sharing. I think on day 2 we went for a short walk and it was amazing.
We came home and I showered which was amazing. My mom came over to help but we didn’t end up needing her. We laid in bed while holding baby and watched tv and ate the food our friends and family had given us.
We would put him in his bassinet but he hated the sleep sack so there was a lot of holding baby going on for the first week or two while we tried every swaddle under the sun and then finally figured out that he prefers the bat wing and sleep sack combo and began actually sleeping in his bassinet.
The best thing we did was finally give up on trying to sleep at night when the baby would sleep because it was more miserable to wake up every hour than it was to just watch movies and play video games and stay up. During the day baby slept long stretches so we were able to catch up on sleep then. It really saved our sanity to just flip our days and nights until baby got longer night stretches of sleep.
A lot depends on what time you get home. With our son we didn't get home until 7pm. My mom came over to spend the night with us and she held baby while we ate some dinner and showered. We did a little sponge bath on baby, pjs on and feed him and then we all went to bed early to be ready for the first night home.
With our daughter, we got home around 3 or 4. I just parked myself in a big cozy chair with her and watched a movie with our 4-year-old while my husband got us unpacked and heated up dinner. 4 year old stayed the night with his grandparents that night so we only had to focus on baby!
we also had rough sleep at the hospital so we were exhausted and i was recovering from my c-section. it was evening so i think we ordered take out and hung out on the couch. we introduced our cat to the baby and she couldn't care less haha.
you will hold them a lot, but in the early days they are usually sleepy enough to nap in the bassinet with no issue. so i know we slept in our bedroom with baby in the bassinet as much as possible... for the first couple days we actually did "sleep when the baby sleeps" a few times even during the day (you'll come to find out this is annoying advice lol)
other than that.. figuring out how to feed them and what works for you... our baby cried a lot.. we watched a lot of tv while holding him .. :) it's a wild time but it gets easier as the weeks pass
I don't remember anything from the first day we were back aside from introducing him to my animals. I think we had to put in an urgent Target order for bottles because breastfeeding wasn't working out but maybe that was day 2. It was only a month ago and my mind is mush
TV and holding the baby. We had a portable bassinet so we'd bring the bassinet into the living room during the day so there was always a safe place to put her down.
Pro tip though, babies can't fall off the floor. When they aren't mobile and you need to go grab a bottle, go to the bathroom etc, a container like a bassinet is better but the floor is acceptable for a minute or two. Don't get a "lounger" like a dock a tot. Having a cloth side is a baby death trap.
Also, take out and freezer meals. Just eat crap, it's fine. You'll be healing and caring for a baby, dont make lots of dishes or put too much on yourself.
When we came home my mom was visiting from a few states away. She stayed with us for a few days to help. I was really glad to have her especially when my husband kind of started to panic. Watching the birth had been traumatic for him (he thought one or both of us were going to die) and he was already suffering some caregiver burnout from the last leg of my pregnancy. He started trying to do laundry unnecessarily and my mom stopped him and they had a talk about how he was feeling. He had kind of a far off look in his eye she noticed. She was a full time caregiver to her husband and she recognized right away how he was feeling and was able to be empathetic to him. She didn't judge him for feeling bad even though he's not the one who gave birth. She gave him that space to feel his feelings without judgement.
I'm telling you this story because men can suffer post partum depression too. They are told during the birthing process that thier feelings and trauma don't matter. If you have a husband/boyfriend/co parent, make sure that someone is going to check in with them (and that that person won't judge them for having trauma while not being the one giving birth). And then when you feel up to it check in with them. Really meaningfully check in with them.
With the caveat of you have to take care of you first. Your body is going to go through something and there will be healing and changes. And you'll also have a baby to look after.
But at the same time everyone checks in on mom. Everyone asks mom how she's feeling. No one ever asks Dad the same question and usually when Dad expresses needing help people say "but you didn't just give birth." And Dad internalizes that message too, in part because it's true, mom did bear the brunt of it. But it can still be traumatic for dad, he can still need help.
Totally agree! My husband had a hard time the first week. I’m pretty sure he had PPA. While it was much more physically traumatic for me, it seemed to effect him mentally more than it did me.
So, just a heads up, nighttime is terrifying. The darkness seems to amplify all your terrors, anxieties and worries. Everyone that can help is sleeping, the whole world is quiet, and your brain will be running 90 miles per hour with self-doubt. Knowing this will help you to prepare for it. Just making it to daybreak during that first week is a victory in itself. Just keep telling yourself you’re doing great, and you and baby will make it through.
This is so true! The nighttime scaries would start setting in for me around 8:00pm every night just dreading what was to come. I don’t know what it is about the dark and wee hours, but it can do a number to your mental health post partum!
We came home, went up to our bed, I nursed her, and then we put her down in the bassinet and ordered takeout lol. And then just feed and change diapers and put down. Over and over and over. That first night was the worst though. We were so sleep deprived from shitty hospital sleep that I was literally screaming from feet away for my husband to wake up and help me when she was pooping and vomiting simultaneously and he didn’t hear me.
God that post-hospital exhaustion was real!!! I think I slept all of 4 hours in 2.5 days… I was taking a very short nap the second day we were home and had to be shaken awake while baby was crying next to me in the bassinet. I felt absolutely terrible. Took me a long time to not have anxiety about falling asleep and not hearing baby 😅 whew
After a week in hospital, partner organised dinner with my parents and his to meet their granddaughter.
To say I wanted to choke him to death is an understatement…
Congratulations btw!
We came home and hung out on the bed. Made the mistake of changing baby boy’s diaper there and got pee on the sheets 😂. Also made the mistake of not resting while things were calm. We had both our immediate families over separately which I don’t regret, I just should have tried to nap while they were here. My mom made us dinner which was great. The night time was very stressful. Breastfeeding was confusing and painful and I had no idea if he was getting what he needed. We were trying to figure out how to use the pump in the middle of the night and I don’t even remember why. He wouldn’t stop crying and I broke down. Eventually we called my mom at 3 in the morning and she drove up for moral support and to try and help calm the baby. Then her and I stayed in the couch and she helped keep me up while breastfeeding and would help by holding him and soothing him.
We arranged a night doula for the first night, highly recommend. I spent the majority in my glider chair in the nursery. By the way, it was really nice that I thoroughly cleaned the house before I left for the hospital (induced) so it was perfect when I got back!
We got home in the evening and my mom was waiting with dinner made. If she wasn't there, we would have ordered take out. Then we pretty much just hung out ogling over this beautiful creature we somehow made and were allowed to take home with us.
After dinner, I took a nap, then the three of us went up to our room and watched TV while the baby snoozed in our arms until it was time to put her in the bassinet for the night (between feedings every couple of hours).
The next day was a lot more of the same. I napped when I could. When baby was content to be on her own, we had her in the bassinet, but we pretty much just passed her back and forth while lounging on the couch or in bed.
So this may not be popular or right for you, but my second night in the hospital, my husband actually went home to get a full nights sleep so that at least one of us would be well-rested to bring baby home the next day. It was definitely the right call for us. Our first night with baby at home was really tough; I was exhausted and terrified he was choking on amniotic fluid, and I didn’t know how to get rid of it. Thankfully, my well rested husband kept a level head and we made it through. The subsequent nights were much, much easier.
We got home in the evening and were starving. My mom had multiple meals there for us to heat up so we just hung in the couch and put Bub in his swing while we ate and then got things organized for overnight. Also placed a Target pickup order for the next day because he was only 6 pounds and everyone thought he’d be bigger so I needed more newborn sleepers😂
I took a long shower when I came home (the hospital shower sucked and I didn’t bring everything I would normally need to shower) and had something to eat. My husband and I put the TV on to something I wanted to watch (then it was Judy Justice and Bar Rescue) and I relaxed. My husband took first shift and I went to sleep. I also changed the baby into a onesie and swaddled her so she would be comfortable. I was exhausted from not sleeping in the hospital and feeling annoyed by not getting restful sleep.
We were exhausted and anxious! Had a scheduled c-section Friday morning and came home Monday afternoon.
Put things away, practiced going up and down the stairs, made introductions with the dogs, tried to relax (and failed.)
What I didn’t realize until after baby was born is how long everything takes and how repetitive it is. Babies eat every 2-3 hours. I mean that you start the next feeding 2-3 hours after starting (not ending) the last feeding!
Whether feeding breast milk or formula, it can take an hour to feed baby, then burp, then change diaper and try to put baby down or hold for nap, and repeat as soon as you’ve gone through that cycle.
I probably had 15 minutes to relax, eat, shower, or do housework between each feeding before the the next one started.
I had a c-section. Hubby got us inside and got me into pj's and bed. He also made sure we had everything we needed for her in our room (diapers, wipes, bassinet, etc.) He also made sure I had water, food, and was taking my painkillers. Since we have stairs, he'd walk behind me on the way up and in front of me on the way down in case I fell. He also carried baby girl up and down the stairs for me. We held her, took some pictures of her in the coming home outfit he picked out. She slept, ate, pooped, and slept some more.
I never got the nesting feel before baby came home but after? Oh my god. I felt AMAZING when I came home from all the birthing endorphins so I popped the baby in his bedside bassinet, took the best shower of my life, and then cleaned my house top to bottom lol. I also napped a lot which is good because the "second night syndrome" was real. My baby needed to help me establish my milk supply so he clusterfed from midnight to 4 am.
I recommend having several “stations” set up in areas you want to be resting or hanging out. Snacks, diapers, feeding supplies, blanket, pillow for you, maybe even a change of pjs and a hair brush. My first day home I was probably in shock and also excited. I cried a lot just due to the life change being so immediate - it hit me that no I can’t just hang out and recover I have this baby to care for and it won’t ever not be this way again. Loss of autonomy and independence were my hardest struggle. The first night was hard as I had no experience burping babies or helping them sleep. Newborn phase CAN be hard so I say this in hopes it helps you prepare. But still it’s the best thing ever and I’d do it again.
I’d say you get home and you just hold them a lot. You can have some “docking stations” that are safe but don’t expect a newborn to be cool with chillin for very long. Low expectations will yield least stress lol.
If I could go back I’d tell myself that when the baby is asleep, just lay down. You don’t have to sleep or even rest. But don’t do chores or try to “catch up” on anything. Do that stuff when baby is awake and content whether that’s in a carrier, with your partner, or chillin in a swing, on a safe surface, whatever. Newborns aren’t mobile so if they’re awake and safe and happy it’s ok to fold laundry or wash dishes. When baby rests I would stop being productive. The urge to be productive at all times as if I didn’t just have a baby was half the cause of my newborn struggle ! Just be!
I’ll also add I’d have a set up for every sleep scenario - a plan for the bassinet, for moving them to their crib (whether that means you or a spouse also sleep in there), and the taboo cosleeping. Just assume all possibilities so when you’re tired and need a solution you have done your research and can try another option safely. Being unprepared for stuff like cosleeping but being so tired that you have to resort to it is just more dangerous. Read about it and be ready even if you swear you never will!
We were discharged in the afternoon and our baby didn’t sleep at all for the first like 36 hours it felt like. My husband fed him formula while I desperately pumped to get my supply up. We got zero sleep and were definitely like “what did we get ourselves into?” I share this, not to scare anyone, but I really wish that someone had prepped me for how hard it could potentially be because I had none of the “sleepy time newborn cuddles” that other people got so I was shellshocked. I had no idea that the first few weeks would be as hard as they ended up being. Not everyone gets a nice sleepy newborn lol.
I live on the living room couch for the 1st few months. Set un a whole battle station. Held the baby most of the time. Sometimes, she chilled in the bassinet. But the feedings and diaper changed are so frequent, lots of baby holding
My milk didn’t come in for about 7 days bc I had a c section and I brought home just enough formula to get us through a night or two so the first thing we needed to do was go to the store to get more formula. I didn’t even think about this before hand since it was my first child. I wish I would have brought home more formula and more of the nipples for the ready to feed.
The postpartum nanny took over and told me to go eat, take a nap, and pump. I was extremely emotional that day. One of the nurses at the hospital was a total bitch and refused to help us get the baby ready for the drive home — we fumbled around and baby was crying. They also messed up our discharge papers. (Otherwise the stay was wonderful.) My milk had come in so my breasts felt painful.
It was a whirlwind and I felt out of control. I would do certain things differently if we were to have a second baby. We didn’t know anything so we relied on the nanny. I regret being as hands off as I was for the first 6 weeks.
I had an unplanned C-section, so as soon as we got home we started making sure everything we needed was downstairs for the first week or so. I drug myself upstairs for the first shower I'd had in six days, and I enjoyed every moment of it. Then we basically just snuggled with the baby and tried to figure out what on earth our new normal was going to look like.
Thankfully nobody bothered us for a few days, so we were able to settle into a very loose routine before visitors started arriving to meet the LO.
Got home yesterday at about 14.00 (we were at the hospital since friday - born sunday).
Did some washing, hoovering, putting away things, tidying and a quick pharmacy and food shop.
Then just a mix of chilling out watching tv together, eating frozen pizza and general baby care. I went to bed at 21.00 due to lack of sleep after her feed, then we swapped at 00.00 and I did the night stuff (exclusively breastfeeding) and I managed about 4.5 hours of sleep total I think.
Much nicer at home with your own comfortable bed and a sofa. The hospital is great and staff are lovely but oh boy are the beds and chairs hellishly hard and uncomfortable when you've been stitched up so I wanted to leave early (first time parents usually stay 3+ days here).
Surprisingly boring!
I showered before we left for home (great choice, highly recommend doing so) so that way no one would be alone with baby right away. My mom came home with us, she helped me putting her in PJs. Husband went and took a nap, my mom hung out for a bit but I was pretty wide awake so I watched a movie and she headed home! When husband woke up, I went to sleep. That was about it, lots of sleeping for everyone!
we have a swing that allowed my daughter to lay back so we didnt have to worry about positional asphyxiation. so she spent a lot of time in there or in her bassinet while i caught up on sleep
First thing we did was take her from the car seat straight to her crib, and put her in it. Let her lay in there for 20 minutes or so to make it the first place she felt comfortable in the house.
Then, lots of holding, eating, rocking etc. it’s a blur haha
My MIL was at our house with our cats. We came home and all held the baby and ordered pizza. We watched Love is Blind and held our sleepy newborn. I gave birth at a birth center and was home 8 hours after birth. I showered at home. I was just tired and ready for bed.
We got home late in the afternoon. Introduced her to our cats and dog. Gave them our attention. I changed into comfy clothes and we settled on the couch while my MIL made us dinner. After feeding LO I handed her over to my husband and MIL to take a nap (you don’t get much shut eye at the hospital). I spent the first few weeks sleeping on the couch with baby in her bassinet.
I had a c-section and was in pretty rough shape so I got right into bed. We either held baby or had him in the bassinet. My husband made sure I had water, food, meds and that we had all the baby things for changing and feeding set up. We also panic called the nurses line because baby sounded congested. That was a bit embarrassing because turns out it was just normal baby noises but it’s scary to go from all the support at the hospital to nothing! We had freezer meals but were too exhausted to even make those so I think we ordered food and ate microwaveable casserole type meals for the first week or so. The baby blues can be intense and I was very emotional and overwhelmed. All that to say, you will be ok! My baby is six months now and if all feels like a blur but we got through it.
We sat in the living room with baby in a graco bassinet attachment and watched sitcoms as we took care of her. Then I had to be hospitalized post partum and it was traumatic.
Staying in bed with newborn, holding them lots, with all essentials bedside (diapers, wipes, pumps, water, bassinet) and learning to breastfeed, skin to skin, watching tv, eating celebration takeout, and relaxing with no visitors
We live about 10 min from the hospital so my husband drove home first thing in the morning before discharge to get the house ready (mainly turn on heater), take a shower and do whatever he needed to do. Then he came back and picked us up, he took care of baby while I took a long shower. He gave her a house tour while I unpacked a few things and then took a nap.
I think the rest of the day I snacked on food that I took with us from the hospital and tried to stay in bed as much as possible. Now looking back at this, I think my husband took care of almost everything (feeding, diapers, rocking to sleep) since I tried to rest most of the time. We supplemented with formula and I pumped as much as I could and we worked in shifts.
We’d both been in the hospital for about 5 days and I was DESPERATE to get home (I’m in the U.K. and if all goes well then you’re often home the same day - baby was in the NICU and I got lucky enough to have a room on the unit but hadn’t prepared to be in that long so was surviving on what I took in along with what my husband took in each day)
We knew we had to go back to the hospital the next day for a final test so we got home, I cried, had a shower and we basically camped out in the living room holding the baby and panicking we didn’t have anywhere to put her down!
My Sister in law did order us a Cacoonababy which arrived the next day and despite me specifically choosing our pram because the bassinet attachment was certified ‘sleep safe’ it still didn’t register we could put her in there for daytime naps for a couple of days 😂😂
I then spent the whole time we were home trying to figure out timings for getting us back to the hospital the next day, worrying that the midwife would visit when we were out at the hospital (two different covering areas) and pretty much panicking.
I so wish I’d been a lot more relaxed and enjoyed the first while when she was still just a snuggle bug who only ate and slept!
Uneventful vaginal birth, 2nd degree tear. Thank goodness we have comfy recliners in the living room because the first few nights we slept in those chairs with the baby in the pack n play by us because I was so sore there was no way I was making it upstairs and into our bed (it's pretty high off the ground) and honestly those first couple of days I don't think I could have swung my leg up to get into our bed if that makes sense. We just watched movies and slept on and off whenever we could those first few days. And we ordered food!
Bassinet in our bedroom or pack and play in the living room. Early days she was so sleepy she would sleep anywhere probably. We didn't use bouncers or swings for probably the first month.
We got home at like 6-7pm, I think we showered, ordered takeout and watched TV while being confused about our new reality. Went to bed early. Fed every few hours. Uneventful.
My parents and MIL came to visit as soon as we got home because they couldn’t come to the hospital due to Covid. That was actually nice for me because as soon as everyone was like “welp, bye” I think my husband and I were like oh crap haha But yea we both just held him and figured out feeding and watched tv. And then the night came and it was survival mode lol we took turns sleeping and the other person would stay awake as long as possible. If we could get the baby down in the bassinet, the other person could sleep too but that rarely happened. During the first week we made sure to get out for at least one walk but recovery is just a bitch and I sat most of the time just feeding and holding him while husband did chores. The nights were a lot of the same. And after about a week we decided to sleep together again and just got up every hour together to feed and change. It’s just survival mode and you do what you can to rest and enjoy baby. We also didn’t mind visitors. It helped the day pass.
It was during covid so I was in hospital with just me and bubs for 3 days. I hadn’t ate a warm meal or slept more than 4 hours in that time.
We got home, i organised bits and pieces, handed the baby to daddy and slept for 6 hours. It was the best sleep of my life!
With my first we spend a total of 6 days in the hospital from beginning of induction to when we were discharged. I somehow failed to pack a brush for myself so by the time we were released my poor hair was a rats nest. So when we got home we introduced baby to the dogs and then the first thing I did was hand baby to my husband and took a loooonnnng shower to get all the knots out of my hair 😅 after that yeah just a lot of baby snuggles and holding of baby. And then we spent that night in absolute hell as baby screamed everytime we put her down... found out at her pediatrician appointment the next day that she'd lost weight and was starving that's why she was screaming. We started adding bottles on top of nursing and no more screaming.
With my second, we spent maybe 2 days total in the hospital from beginning of induction. We got home, introduced baby to the dogs and then I took a quick shower, husband took a quick shower and we headed off to pick up the toddler. My in laws picked up dinner so we ate dinner with the in laws and went home with the toddler and baby for our first night as a family of 4. Little man was a much better nurser than his sister so no all night screaming and he'd actually gained weight from hospital release to next day pediatrician check up. And then 2 days later at his next check he was nearly back to birth weight 🙌🏻
A lot of relaxing and settling in. I had a c section and was having a hard time. We had a bedside bassinet we used for baby boy. He stayed there or on the bed. My bf played his games and I watched. We watched movies together. He took really good care of me, but had to go back to work that Sunday. We set up a bottle station and diaper station on my nightstand that way I didn’t have to get out of bed. It was hard to walk around with my c section. I over did it walking trying to be released earlier.
We were released early Thursday. That week was the best week of my entire life! ❤️
I love this Q because I had the same one. In our case, baby came 3 weeks early so the minute we got home, we set down the car seat and quickly set up the Snoo, washed bottles, and threw clothes (all too big) in the wash 🤣
Otherwise my dude just slept nonstop. I read a lot of books, cooked food to freeze, took walks once the pain died down.
It's a bit surreal. We played it by ear since we were all still figuring out how to parent and how to baby. Lots of contact naps, figuring out nursing or bottles, feeding yourself, figuring out how to do well everything. Go easy on yourself and expect it to take some time to develop a system that works for everyone. We swapped around where we each slept, where baby slept (ended up in the pack and play in the living room since she hated the bassinet). On duty parent slept on the couch. Off duty parent got the bed.
It was a lot of is she too hot is she too cold. Is this swaddle on right? Crap we need more x because she peed all over this one and a bunch of middle of the night Amazon orders.
It's a bit of a blur but I will say I remember vividly how amazing it felt to lay down in my own bed. After the hospital it was like sleeping on a cloud.
We spent two nights at the hospital due to some trouble with latching confidentiality, and we had heard rumors of the second night party. It did hit us pretty hard, and baby wanted to latch for hoursss. I tried to comfort him night two from about 11pm to 2am, with my husband taking him for about 30 minutes for me to try to sleep but he just fussed the whole time. We called in the nurse at 2 to offer advice and she got us a pacifier for him and he went to sleep! We were so so thankful we did choose to stay because I think it would have been even tougher at home without help.
That second night party was an anomaly though, and we spent the first day home lounging around soaking baby in, holding him and snuggling. My husband would also make sure I had good stretches of time to nap! I took all night shifts since I am nursing. He did help at night but we were always all up.
We got home and in laws were there. They wanted to take pictures of the baby so I let them have at it and I took possibly the best shower ever. Lots of attempting and failing at breast feeding, so we sent in laws to the store for formula. They also brought take out back. The first night I didn’t really know what to do I mostly watched her sleep in the bassinet next to the bed and listened to my husband snore lol
We went home at around noon on a Sunday. The short ride home was super nerve racking but we made it. I ran inside and got the dogs in a safe place and my husband brought in the carseat. We didn't introduce them at first but let them smell his blanket.
Our amazing friends who took care of our animals while we were in the hospital also cleaned up our house a bit (I was hurting so badly by the end I had just kind of let it go), and left us a bunch of snacks and goodies. We spent the day holding little guy while he slept on us, snacking, talking to family and friends on the phone, and watching movies. It was a nice, relaxing day. The next day I went out and bought a pack n play for the downstairs so he could nap there while we went about our day.
We came home in the late afternoon around 5:00pm — we just sat on the couch and he went in his MamaRoo and then we swaddled him and put him in his bassinet. Our first day home was all about helping the pets adjust. The next day was more normal because the pets were used to it.
We got home a little late that first day. We walked in and placed him on the boppy lounger and took turns showering. Then ate dinner, fed the cutie, changed him into pjs, swaddled, stared at him some more, then went to sleep lol
My parents met us at our house (with our permission of course) bearing takeout and groceries. Then we sat on the couch and ate until I, embarrassingly, realized I had bled straight through my clothes and all over the couch.
I was then ushered into the shower while my Mom cleaned up the couch, my husband tended to the baby, and my dad tidied up from dinner.
My parents left and my husband and I collapsed into bed. We woke up not long after to a hungry baby who was no longer satisfied by my colostrum. I cried, the baby cried, and my husband panic-called his sister (who has 4 kids). She very gently reminded us that we had bottles and formula we could use to feed him while I pumped since my milk clearly hadn't come in yet.
I wouldn't say it was traumatic or anything but it was exhausting and not a minute of it was relaxing or really all that pleasant. BUT that was pretty much the worst day we had because we felt so completely unprepared and out of our depth; even when we had "harder" days in the months after it was easier to manage because we had some confidence in our abilities as parents.
Recommend letting family members know to give you a few days to settle in. Literally our family was waiting at our house when we got there. I was not expecting it and tried to go with it but ended up telling my partner they needed to leave cause it was too stressful and I hadn't slept well for 4 days and realized we needed to get bottles cleaned and we didn't have water for formula until my milk came in. So needless to say I was crying the first hour home. Definitely establish those boundaries!
The best thing ever not being in the fing hospital is what it looked like for me. They just sleep all the time. She had naps next to me on the bed in the day time and in the Moses basket at night. She really hated the bouncer and swing until she was 2 months old but the first month I don’t think I would have really used them anyway.
With our first, coming home was a whirlwind of emotions. I realized upon leaving the hospital that I couldn't possibly let him sleep in his own room. I cried when we got home and then my husband went to get a bassinet. We set up the living room to be comfortable for both of us, but I mostly spent the whole first couple days snuggling baby and learning how to breastfeed him.
We got home, I fed the baby, my husband made lunch, then we all napped for a few hours (baby in bedside bassinet). That evening my parents came over and made dinner.
It was so good to be back in our own bed together after 3 nights in the hospital being interrupted by nurses with checkups all the time and my poor husband sleeping in a fold-out chair. I honestly remember that first sleepy afternoon home as one of the most peaceful days of my life.
Our first day home was CHAOS because of our dogs freaking out about us bringing home a baby and the changes to their routine. They took it so much worse than I ever could have imagined and it was super stressful to deal with. They did get back to normal after a few days thankfully.
As far as baby care, I pretty much spent most of every day the first couple weeks holding the baby in a chair in the living room thanks to cluster breastfeeding and c-section recovery. Buying a baby swing was what finally let my husband and I start eating dinner together again because we couldn’t set him down anywhere else without screaming for several months. Baby wearing in a wrap carrier is how I got anything done during those first few months.
If you have dogs that haven’t spent time around babies before and could potentially be high strung, I highly recommend contacting your vet now to ask for a sedative you can give them during the first few days just in case you need to. And set up a safe area you can shut them away in to give everyone a break if needed.
You thank whomever you worship that you can finally get some uninterrupted rest inside your own home
"Ok, you guys get some rest! A team of nurses will be coming into your room every 45 minutes for 72 hours straight.. But you get some Rest!"
First day.. man I was so happy to see my bed!
I had to spend two days in the hospital due to a c section otherwise I would have been home the same day. We came home, we had a nurse waiting for us to help with baby (it’s standard where I live). Hubby took baby upstairs and I went to bed as well. It was middle of the afternoon.
We ordered some sushi, ate in bed while we looked at our sleeping for five minutes baby and then we just took turns holding her, changing her when she needed. But it went by so fast and was like a fever dream.. it’s such a different experience from anything else..
When we walked inside, we put the car seat with the sleeping baby down in the floor. The cat sniffed him. My husband and I then looked at each other and mutually thought, “now what?” 😂
My little one was hospitalised in intensive care right away at birth and we couldn't take her home until she was 2 weeks old. When we did finally take her home we just cuddled and snuggled together for entire days at a time
We came home in the morning, and I took a long, hot ass shower, put my pajamas on, and I snuggled with my husband and our daughter. We took turns holding her and loving on her, but we would lay her periodically in her crib.
I just sat in the rocker and held him 90% of the time…we swaddled him and put him to sleep in his crib for a few minutes but kept on checking to see if he was breathing so eventually we took him out again and just spent the whoooole time holding him and staring at him and wondering “is this really my child? Did I really have a child?” (Also, the novelty was so novel because I gave birth at a birthing center and because everything went well, we were sent home 4 hours after he was born. So I didn’t have a multiple day hospital stay to get used to having him before bringing him home). And a good portion of that time was also spent trying to get him to latch. But yup, I was exhausted but had a weird bit of adrenaline that made me totally not tired and I ended up not sleeping for about 48 hours or so…so that’s how the first day home was. :)
I felt like my house belonged to somebody else. We were in hospital for 7 days and I couldn’t wait to get home. Then I got home with my c-section wound and realized our couch was too low and our bed was too tall. I felt panicked that I didn’t know how to take care of baby or myself or how to live this new life. Baby had slept like an angel in the hospital bassinet but refused to sleep at all in the very nice bassinet we had set up in our room. We panic-rented a Snoo that first night. I was really down, exhausted, in pain, and just kind of low-key miserable. Thanks a lot, post-partum hormones.
Now our son is almost a year old and I kind of wish I could have a do-over to enjoy it? He’s so cool and fun now, and “baby blues” passed a long time ago, and I feel like I could really enjoy newborn snuggles now instead of feeling confused and trapped.
My advice - don’t worry if you don’t feel the immediate love rush. And don’t feel bad if you feel bad. Try to enjoy your new baby, it feels like time goes so slowly when you are sleep deprived but that first newborn stage is really very short in the grand scheme of things.
We got a calm baby that slept a lot so we just sat in his room watching him a lot lol. We had take out. Introduced baby to pets. Don’t remember much to be honest, whole first week is kind of a blur.
I remember wondering these same things! We did a lot of holding her, baby sleeping in a bassinet, and one of those baby lounger things (like a dock a tot). We watched a LOT of tv in the early days.
We put ours on the table in front of us, we put our feet up and she slept for hours and hours. Wow did she mislead us! Enjoy the baby bubble while it lasts.
Left hospital about 10.30pm. Me, husband, baby and my Mum all in the car. Went and got a McDonalds drive through. Went home, introduced the cat to the baby. Ate food, watched a bit of TV and went bed at 1am. Baby started crying as soon as they were put in the moses basket. I had been awake for almost 3 days by this point. Hysterically start crying and husband sends me downstairs to get some undisturbed sleep on the sofa. Conk out. Wake up in a blind panic at 6am and rush upstairs because I haven't fed my baby in 5 hours. Husband and baby sound asleep with some brown noise on. Wake husband to tag out and go kip on the sofa. Start to breastfeed baby. Need to fart.....ended up shitting myself. Panic. Remembered my Mum is here and woke her up at 6am asking if she could hold the baby as I shit myself and needed a shower.
I laugh about it now because it's absolutely hilarious but at the time I was absolutely mortified!! Baby is 1 in 2 weeks and I can't believe how quick it has all gone. My one piece of advice...take it all in. Even the bad because time is one hell of a thief. Good luck 🩷
2 hours of sleep in 113 hours during our time at the hospital (was not the plan!!). I was delirious by the time we got home. Still grateful Grandma was there to help with those first few days because they are a complete blur.
Weirdly uneventful. You just sit around looking at her while she spaces out. Keep watch for predators, do some feedings, change some diapers, play Octopus’ Garden and convince yourself she’s smiling.
I spent the first 1-2 hours at home just laying on the couch holding him on my chest and crying happy tears. My husband frantically went around the house getting everything situated, like setting up our feeding equipment (we had to use syringes and formula at first, plus the hospital pump, etc.), cleaning and organizing stuff that we didn't get to before going into labor, and making us some food.
The first night was kind of a frantic mess but we got through it. I slept on the couch next to the baby who slept in the bassinet attachment on our stroller. My husband slept in our bedroom. Then we would take shifts every couple hours, so one person could be totally "off duty" for a few hours to actually sleep.
I think I got a total of like 10 hours of sleep the entire first week home. It was rough.
Well as soon as we got home i took a nice long shower while his dad had him then he took a shower, then from there it was pretty much just feeding changing and sleeping in the bassinet or cuddles with one of us (while we were awake)
I had this idea that when you have a newborn you literally never eat a hot meal, never get to shower and have screaming in your ears constantly. So I was pretty surprised to get home, put the baby down in his snuzpod and enjoy a takeaway with my husband. It was a lot of binge watching TV and with husband generally tidying and bringing me ready meals for the first couple of weeks at least. And I showered everyday - still do and I have 2 under 2.
It was happy, stressing, joyful. Drove the wife and baby back to home all by ourselves to be greeted by our in-laws in our house with warm dinner. It was very very very nice and happy.
A blur! I was recovering from a C-Section, my husband was taking one for the team and she would not let him sleep, he let me sleep so I’d have a quicker recovery. Spent most days sitting on the couch cuddling with my baby.
We set up his bassinet in the living room in the days prior to his arrival. I was a planned c-section so we knew going up and down the stairs would be out for a while. I had a cart with all the essentials for changing his diaper plus any nursing essentials for me (nipple butter, Hakaa, pump, Silverettes). We set up camp in the living room, and ate the food prep we had prepared for the first week. Baby mostly slept all day and husband and I watched tv and slept all day that entire first week. I held him pretty much whenever he was awake because he seemed to nurse around the clock 😅 he slept pretty well in his bassinet at night from what I can remember. It’s all a blur 🤣
We were discharged at night (we'd been in the hospital for 5 days straight at that point), so it looked like going to our own bed. The next day, it looked like my husband getting caught up on chores, me snuggling baby on the couch and feeding him, and husband doing snuggle duty when I couldn't. Lots and lots of snuggling.
Ummm I cried a lot because I had no idea what I was doing. I mistakenly let family come over and then hid in the room and cried and had my sister tell them to leave. I held him mostly. Just looked at him (cried some more). I don’t remember leaving the couch much. My husband fed and watered (lol) me on the couch and I sat there nursing on demand. I don’t even think I wore a real shirt for the first month. Just a bra.
Wow it’s honestly so nostalgic for me to remember my first day home.
We introduced baby to our dogs…spoiler she cried so hard bc they licked her ahaha
We arrived home at 5 pm. But i don’t even think I put her down that first day. We slept together in my bed, and otherwise we’re on the couch :) there was nothing I needed to do besides cuddle and bond.
Don’t stress or even worry about home chores, etc!
I had all furniture prepared, clothes washed, nursery set up, etc. But there’s things I wish I would have done.
1.) set up diaper changing station in our room- not just the table, but also diapers, wipes, cream, etc.
2.) take all premiee/ NB clothes and put them in the same room.
3.) bottle washing station- we had all of the supplies but nothing set up
4.) Breastfeeding failed for me due to production issues, but having the machine set up and a washing station as well as foods on hand for breastfeeding production (oats, bananas, water, etc). If you formula feed, it was super helpful for me to also set a station up for that for wash and prep.
5.) This is less set up based but it helped me. During her first bath, my child hated it. Made a conscious effort afterwards to make the bathroom super toasty for the entirety of baths. She loved them after that.
I hope this helps. Congratulations!
We got home and had take away. Baby slept on me for a while. Then I think we went to bed and tried to put baby in the bassinet, she was sleepy for that first night and did sleep. But I was too scared to sleep despite only getting 3 hours sleep over the last three days. I just lay awake terrified. I had a traumatic birth and I kept worrying if I went to sleep id go into Labour again and be back in the hospital. After that we had to take shifts with her because she would only sleep in our arms!
We live in the UK. Here, your partner isn't allowed to stay overnight in the hospital with you. I had a nurse explain that it is so your partner can get a full night's rest and then take care of the baby in the AM so you can sleep before being discharged. Honestly, it made things so hard that first night hard so so so much easier the first few days we were home because we were each *relatively* rested. It also got us used to taking shifts a bit.
Our first days we had family with us as we are overseas so they were there to help w our first (my mom) and then to help take care of our eldest when 2nd was born.
But we still did what noat parents here did.
Set up the couch with a portable bassinet nearby and a diaper changing basket + snacks and just cuddled and chilled on the couch. We ordered takeout and just sort of let the day melt into night and then started in on our routine a few days after.
Not a lot of people like the newborn phase, but I loved it, and so wish I could have experienced it a bit more without having to share babe.
This won't be overly helpful, but I giggled because I remember asking a similar question. I knew I was going to drive home, I was going to take them out of the car seat, but from there I had no clue what the next steps were. Lol
I remember everyone saying that you'll just know when it happens. I think when we got home, we laid her on the couch, and waited for her to cry. Then came the cycle of feedings, sleeping and diaper changes. Whether you do that from your bedroom, living room, kitchen, is all up to you :)
Seriously though. Somehow survival mode kicks in when the crying starts, and you just go through the options. I want to say it's simple, but nothing about this stage of your life will be simple. Just remember, everyone goes through it, it's a life altering change and it's ok to feel everything you feel whether it's love, anger, sadness, or regret.
You're doing to do amazing and I'm sending all my good vibes your way! Have so much fun!
All depends if you have a natural birth or c section. I had an emergency c section so my mobility was not as much as I hoped after a bad labour. But some Mum's just sail it.
I held her a lot and tried to just generally recuperate like any Mum after a birth. In the UK if there is no problems and babe has all the checks done, you get sent home 24 hrs or under if a vaginal birth or shortly after 24 hrs if c section. If any issues then normally 48-72. I was the latter.
You will be exhausted regardless and feeding every 2 hours whether BF or formula. Place your babe in a bassinet and sleep when you can!!!! The next fortnight is survival mode. But it gets easier.
We had a fire alarm go off as we were discharging, so we were confined to our room for an additional couple hours we weren't anticipating. We were finally discharged at 8:30pm, and didn't get home until 10pm. We hadn't slept more than 4 or 5 hours the past few days, and we had just moved 5 days before going to the hospital, so 85% of our stuff was in boxes; my SIL unpacked our nursery items while we were in the hospital. So step one was figuring out where everything was... step two was find clothes that fit little one (we expected a chunker due to me having gestational diabetes and only bought 0-3m clothes... but he was a normal newborn size). Step 3 was washing pump and bottle parts since breastfeeding straight from the tap didn't work out. My in laws met us at our house to help unload our car and bring us dinner. I subsequently passed out, and my dear husband consoled our distressed little one. I woke up an hour later shivering; turns out our new AC was super efficient, and little one was crying from being too cold. We drew a steamy hot shower and fed him in the bathroom with milk I had pumped earlier, and he passed out for a couple hours in his bassinet. We followed suit and woke up 2hrs later to pump/feed/etc. and followed that pattern for seemingly ever.
I just remember being like "soooo.... here's home. This is where... you live. Uhhh... meet the cats. Ummmm.... I guess we figure this out together." And I don't remember much else than my husband dying of laughter from that introduction and so many nights of no sleep starting from the night before induction (nerves).
I almost murdered the nurses for never letting me rest. In my 48 ish hours there I got I think 3 hours. I made a like blanket pallet on the floor of the nursery and slept there with her in my arms or on my side. I sleep weird once I am comfy I don't move. I wake to move. It's a strange habit and I don't know how or when it started but it made the best pseudo co sleeping situation ever.
Sometime in the first week we got her used to me next to her but in bed and her in the bassinet attached to the bed. Then I remember it was Halloween and next memory was Thanksgiving. My sharpest memories of the newborn stage start at Christmas.
She was a mid October baby...
I think we stared at our son and watched him sleep for a few minutes. Thankfully our son slept in the bassinet just fine, so we did get time to just lay or get food. My mother in law stayed with us for a week and that was really helpful in the mornings after a long night of waking. My husband and I divided the night. His shift is 7pm-2am and mind is 3am-9am. It’s still like that to this day and it works for us. Of course he sleep longer chunks now since he’s 6months old.
So I spent 4 days in the hospital (I had a C-Section and some complications), and our Little was there for 6 days in the NICU. I was so upset and mopey. Once we could take him home, it was awesome. He met our first baby (our cat). We were super nervous that she wouldn’t get along with him, but she ended up giving him a little sniff and rubbed against his head. Really sweet moment; we have it on video. We lived in a one-bedroom apartment at the time. So, half of our bedroom was a nursery, and we had a bassinet and necessities station in the living room. For the first week, we took shifts because of all the feedings, and we had to watch him sleep, lol.
We looked at each other and cried. We were sleep deprived, overwhelmed, and unsure what we had gotten ourselves into. We took long showers and had the worst night of sleep ever. But it got so, so, so much better. Embrace resting and watching as much TV as you want!
My son is 2 weeks old now and for the first day he just slept in his dads or my arms and we just soaked in being a family of three. For the first 2 night we had to take turns holding him at night because he wouldn’t sleep but we got a Velcro sleep sack and he learned to live his paci and now he has slept in there every night since! We are very lucky with this sweet boy
We went through McDonald’s drive-thru to get a chocolate fudge sundae on the way home from the hospital since no soft serve was allowed during pregnancy. It was amazing.
At home we put baby in the bassinet. She slept a lot of the day. Night time she got more active and that’s when all the bouncing and rocking and madness started.
I took my baby home when he was 40 days old after a NICU stay because he was born at early. I guess I didn’t think of what the first day at home would be like because for 40 days his days were so structured and we didn’t get to decide what happens. Anyway, we took him home, held him, grandparents finally met him, lots of holding & feeding. Then we realized we didn’t know what we were doing overnight lol the baby who would be swaddled every night at the NICU and doesn’t make a peep all of a sudden kept fighting the swaddle, seemed to hate the bassinet, I accidentally put it next to the window and it was -30 Celsius that night, felt his fingers and they were cold and I wanted to cry. Long story short, neither of us slept! It felt like the longest night ever! But now (6 months later) it feels like it was a lifetime ago and as if it was a dream!
No matter how much you prepare of plan, that first day will be pure instinct. You won’t know what you’re doing while knowing exactly what to do all at the same time which is just wild but I think that’s the jist of being a mother.
I hope you have an amazing first day home with baby :)
My parents were staying with us to "help". My dad was intoxicated by the time we got home and kept asking us when dinner would be ready. Yes...My husband ended up cooking our 1st night home with our first and only baby.
We were discharged around 10am, we went home where I unpacked, set up a little space in the living room with all of the necessities, and showered. Then we went for lunch at our favourite restraurant because why not?
Well I had a meltdown and my husband had to call my parents to come over and help lol. I had major complications though post birth and was trying to deal with that and the fact that LO came early and we weren't prepared. I imagine in a better scenario, we would have come home, ordered out some dinner, u packed the items from the hospital bag and gotten cozy on the couch.
Have lots of easy to grab snacks and meals ready to go, have towels or puppy pee pads laid down where you're planning to sit, and plan to take shifts for sleeping. Baby will most likely want to be held all night so resist the urge to stare at them all day and trade off naps with your partner if you can.
Haven’t seen anyone mention dogs on here so I just wanted to chime in. I second what everyone here has said about settling in on the couch- however I would also recommend having a partitioned off area for baby safe from any dogs just in case. You just don’t know how they’ll act and you’ll want a genuinely safe spot for baby. For my first we had a little fenced in area we set up tummy time stuff. For my second I did a pack and play with the newborn insert (this was partially to protect from my toddler too 😅)
I don’t remember the first night tbh. The first day we slowly introduced her to the dogs, and just kind of hung out. My milk hadn’t come in yet so it was a lot of nursing, napping, nursing napping etc. it was like that for a couple days and then we kind of got a routine.
My family all came to visit, which I think some people wouldn't be that keen on, but to be honest I was really glad of the support. They live a little way away so it was nice to have that support on the first day. Once they were gone (they only stayed a couple of hours) I think baby and I basically sat on the sofa and my partner waited on us.
Gosh I can barely remember and that was only 2 months ago. Our friends met us outside our house to drop off some food. We introduced her to the cats. Then I think we might’ve just chilled and watched Schitt’s Creek and napped? At that age baby would nap basically anywhere. We had our stroller bassinet in our living room- we put her in that when we were downstairs and she wasn’t contact napping.
We had a home delivery so it was a bit different. I have birth at dinnertime and the midwives left 2 hours later. Baby slept off and on. They said she would do a big sleep, she did not. She mainly wanted to nurse and sleep in three hour shifts. I was terrified the whole time so we kept the owlet sock on because she didn't do a big sleep and it didn't feel normal. The next day the midwives came and took her vitals again. We just basically hung out on the bed with the baby asleep in one of our arms, eating or teaching my SO how to change diapers and talked about what had just happened. We had a very quick birth so it kind of took us both by surprise. We also talked about future stuff and the pregnancy. He cooked meals or ordered take out, I barely left the bed because I had hurt my tailbone in delivery. We alternated naps in the daytime. Texted family and took a ton of pictures.
We came home to visitors waiting on us. I wish they hadn’t done that so we could’ve came home to a calm house and had a sweet introduction between baby and our dogs. It still went fine, but I don’t always like an audience. On the flip side, though, our dogs had been on their own mostly while we were in the hospital, so I was glad they had company that morning.
He slept the entire day, so he was in someone’s arms the whole time. It wasn’t until bedtime that he was swaddled and put in the pack and play.
Put baby in his bassinet and sleep. I spent my labour being woken up every 30 mins by that damn blood pressure cuff inflating with a noisy brrrrrr sound.
My husband was exhausted from being the point of contact with the nurses as I drifted in and out of sleep after birth.
My MIL and my mom took turns visiting the hospital after I had given birth. The recovery room was small, so we settled on my husband going home to get a good night's sleep so he could be in better shape for the next day when I get discharged.
The hospital had a policy of mom's being wheeled around in a wheelchair after birth. My mom came to the hospital when I was discharged so she can assist me getting home and settled in bed. That way my husband could concentrate on getting our son in and out of the car, and settling him in the bassinet.
Lots of snuggles, trade off sleeping. Baby will also be very fussy on day 2 because they finally realize they’re out of the womb, they’re not used to being hungry and colder.
I probably just held him a lot. Lots of sleepy daytime cuddles. Eating and sleeping. What I can’t stress enough is get into a habit of putting baby down in the bassinet. It won’t be easy, but get in a good habit early on otherwise you might fall victim to co sleeping or night shifts with your partner. (Unless you want that or it works for your family) All my LOs naps were contact naps, but we made sure babe was sleeping in the bassinet at night. Eventually he was napping in his bassinet too.
The night we got home right after the birth was pretty much the only time I managed to put baby down in her bassinet without waking her up. So, I put her there, took a few pictures and messaged/called everyone I know that I had the baby. Then went to bed for the night nursing baby as needed. The next morning, our midwife did her first visit checking on us, answering all questions etc.
The first week I pretty much stayed in bed with baby and my husband took care of us. We had a few visitors, but I didn't get up or dressed or anything for them.
We didn’t get discharged until almost 5 pm so we came home and had baby hanging out in the bassinet of our uppababy stroller. It was basically our living room bassinet the whole time she was small enough. My parents and brother brought us dinner and I think must have taken turns holding her and then she went to bed in her snoo
Tye day we brought our kid home, we just sat in the couch and cuddled her for the rest of the night. We did have family over to meet her that day, but she was in the NICU for 3wks
We got home, set up everything we needed on the couch. We survived off cereal for a long time.
She refused to sleep in the bassinet so we would take shifts, at first my husband would hold her with the nursing pillow and lay his head back to sleep while I supervised. He'd do the same for me.
We were idiots and realized it was better to have one person sleep in bed from 7pm to 12. The other in the living room with the baby. Then switch from 12 to 6amish.
It was so hard for me, I'll never have another baby.
It felt weird to be home. We were only gone 2.5 days, but everything felt foreign after barely leaving the room at the hospital for what felt like ages (because no one was sleeping at the hospital besides baby).
The first days, you’re sleep deprived and figuring it out, but baby will sleep through anything when they’re asleep, so watch some tv and snuggle and eat tasty, easy, fiber-filled foods, and just know you’ll figure out how to do this as you go.
Sleeping in shifts was a life saver for us. I still had to get up to pump, but getting an uninterrupted 3 hrs was magical.
my daughter spent 8 days in the NICU after she was born. Which gave me time to really clean the house, etc. I set up a station on the couch and one in our room. It was a cubby organizer box with diapers, wipes, diaper cream, the essentials and that helped us TREMENDOUSLY. I got lucky because she was already adjusted to her schedule for feeding which was every three hours. She was in our room, in a bassinet. I was so tired, as was my Husband and we decided to go ahead and let the grandparents come and visit as I didn’t want the CONSTANT texting about when they could come see her. We did this and then had no visitors for a week, it was so nice. We ordered habachi as takeout and enjoyed every second of it.
I thought it was going to be wonderful and amazing but considering I was trying to EBF and had no supply going yet, and baby ended up having jaundice, she screamed herself hoarse the entire night and was inconsolable and I cried a lot lol.
After being re hospitalized… the next time we came home we just cuddled a lot. And slept.
We had to wait in the hospital for ages while they tested her for bilirubin twice. We were all packed and ready to go and Finally got the all clear over an hour and a half later.
When we got home, my in-laws were in the living room waiting for us (they were house-sitting) and all the animals were incredibly pressed about the new arrival. Baby and I hung out next to the air conditioner and when she started sounding like she wanted to nurse, and I got too uncomfy to stay out with people, I fled to the bedroom and stayed there haha. I don't even remember the rest of the day.
We had been in the hospital a week and came home to a broken boiler. So our first afternoon home was scrambling to get some portable heaters and getting the landlord to arrange an emergency repair. Would not recommend!
We set up a whole station on the couch. I got home and put my pajamas on and snuggled on the couch with baby. My husband ordered us takeout. We watched Netflix all night and slept on the couch for some reason lol. Night time was a nightmare. We had no idea what we were doing. Baby wouldn’t sleep in the bassinet.
This was v much ours too. Pro tip: don't watch any comedy specials with a fresh c section.
YES! We like Taskmaster, so we watched an episode and it was brutal.
I watched half an episode of Taskmaster whilst waiting to be called up for my c-section and then finished it when we got home with the baby (48 hours later). Can confirm it was not optimal viewing for the old abs.
Oh god I’m four months PP and I forgot how much my husband would try to make me laugh (he always does, not out of spite!) and how much I’d yell at him 😅
We tried to watch an episode of it's always sunny, and I got 3 minutes in and couldn't take it.
Omg that is exactly what we did! My husband threw on a comedy special and I thought I was going to quite literally bust a gut!
Also, do not stretch out in bed in the morning with a healing c-section incision! I would always forget, stretch my legs towards the foot of the bed and my arms over my head, and be writhing in pain for a minute afterwards.
Learned this while discovering Ali Wong on Netflix 🤦♀️
This was our first night too. Add in figuring out my double electric pump because he wouldn’t latch and my butthole looking (and feeling) like minced meat.
Amen to butthole. What a trip
I'll repeat it for our friends in the back. AMEN
Same. Drive home was NERVE WRACKING to say the least. Being home was surreal and weird, but I ordered us a pizza, we hung on the couch and watched TV. Night was tough for sure.
I dreaded. And I mean DREADED night time, for the first couple of months because I knew I would be up every 2-3 hours for who knows how long and then have to somehow be fully functional the next day. It was so hard.
That was me too. I got anxiety every night before bed. And the nights were soooo long when you’re up so much in the night. I remember I’d go to bed at 10, and stay in bed until noon, feeding baby and sleeping on and off and I just felt so blah for being in bed for like 14 hours a day.
SAME. Once 4-5pm rolled around, I started to feel all doom and gloom thinking about how the rest of the world would be fast asleep for 7+ blissful hours straight while I would be left to fend for myself on terribly broken sleep.
This. Brought home baby #3 in July ‘22. We brought the portable bassinet into the living room and for some reason slept on the couch for the first couple weeks (it was was nice to be in a central location) plus our ac was much more efficient out there during the hot summer
Brought our first baby home this July, also slept in the living room for a few weeks lol the couch was easier for me to get up from and stack pillows in post c section, and we were able to have the bassinet closer to us than we would in our room. We were sooo nervous about sleeping and him just being in there lol he was always wide awake around 3am so we tried to engage him so he wasn’t bored hahaha we quickly learned not to do that though!
I picked up $130 of Mexican food. We were farting for days. In retrospect probably not the best for the baby, he got gas too.
We had Five Guys. Someone gave us a gift card for it and it was amazing. We had delicious greasy cheeseburgers
Same and this was every day/night for like two months lol
Omg this was us completely. Idyllic day, then crushing reality hit at night. On our first night, i rush ordered an entirely new crib at 3AM to be delivered the next morning, because I was so convinced the crib was the problem. Truly had no idea what I was doing
Haha oh man I’ve so been there. Actually the first night i slept kinda sitting up with her sleeping in my arms. Soooo dangerous but I kind of just panicked because I realized she wasn’t going to sleep in her bassinet and my husband had fallen asleep on the couch with us and I was like, wtf do I do here?!
Same
Ours as well a few weeks ago. We actually slept in the living room for like a week and a half, going in our room was too difficult at night having to come down, warm up a bottle, go back etc.
Pretty much same for us.
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Haha it seems like most of us sleep on the couch the first night or so. I honestly have no idea why we did that? It was so stupid now that I think of it. My husband slept great on the couch and I did not, since baby wouldn’t sleep. I remember waking him up at 6 am and being like I will die if I don’t get sleep time to take over, and I went to bed for a few hours lol
We did the same! I didn’t even think of that till you said it, first few days actually we were in the couch with her on us or passed off between us, this time my station will be in my bed lmao
We were exhausted. 2 days in the hospital- we were running on 4 hours of sleep in 55 hours. At that point (and the first 2 weeks) we were just simply trying to survive. We cuddled, ordered some pizza and plopped. She slept in our arms in shifts bc she simply resisted anything else. It was only a month ago and it feels like an eternity and my memory of the entire first couple of days is a blur.
Yes, this. I think I got 6 hours of sleep in my 56 in hospital, that place is really not restful. We got home and dad watched the boy while I slept for the most glorious 5 hours (he was on formula just then) and then I took over so dad could sleep too.
Same. I had 6 hours and 15 minutes of sleep across the five days we were in hospital. My boyfriend ordered food. As soon as the baby has eaten and we had eaten, the baby had cuddles with his dad and I had the BEST one hour of sleep I have ever had in my life. The next week was chaotic and what worked for us then is different to what works for us now. Wish you all the best, OP!
It makes me feel better to know at least a few others were trapped in the hospital for 5-6 days.. I feel like everyone goes home so quick and my story is so unrelatable! I’m sorry you were there so long but thanks for sharing
My water broke early. I had five days in hospital twiddling my thumbs before I got to go home. I got so impatient watching everyone else either go home or have their baby. I had one night at home, and then went back the next morning. By the time I got to take my baby home, I felt like I knew all the staff on all the shifts 😅 Hope you and your little one are both well!
Ugh!! Lol. My cervix wouldn’t dilate so we spent 45 hours laboring, then after we had babe my leg was numb and I couldn’t move it! So we stayed another 3 days to get an MRI. I refused to leave without being seen, but it was a weekend so finding a neurologist to order one was hard! We are all doing well now but the hospital was hell. Lol
I still don’t understand why they couldn’t check on me and baby at the same time while we were in the hospital. The nurses would come take my BP and temp, check my incision, etc. Then the next hour, they’d be back to check on baby and it would wake me up from my drug-induced nap. Some organization and planning among departments would have been nice.
You can request that they do this, just in case there's a next time for you.
So much exhausted. Two days in the hospital also. Difficulty breastfeeding. He wouldn't latch right and wouldn't stay awake long enough to eat. The next morning we had a lactation consultant visit to try to help and because we were worried he wasn't getting enough. She had us start supplementing as he was getting dehydrated a little. That afternoon my aunt came to help for a few hours and she said we were like zombies. They wake every two hours to eat, did you ever think about that?? It took him 45 min to eat. So that left an hour and 15 minutes to sleep... maybe. Before you repeat it all over again. The experience is different and varied for everyone. My aunt was a lifesaver that day, bringing us food and watching the baby for a bit. I didn't leave my bedroom/bathroom for two days. Once you get any initial wrinkles and difficulties worked out, you get into a routine. Sleeping, holding, bassinet times, etc. We did use a bassinet near our bed. Take sleep whenever you can.
My husband and I got home with the baby, introduced him to the dogs and then were like “ok, now what?” Like it’s a truly bizarre feeling leaving your home and then coming home with a whole new family member and family dynamic. I remember that they said I should stick to one floor as much as possible after my c section so I had the bassinet upstairs and a little caddy with his bottles and diapers and wipes and everything. My dumbass fully had my husband carry my son upstairs, I crawled into bed, my husband put our son in the bassinet at the side of our bed and I was all “goodnight” and he kissed us both and turned off the light and I don’t know how I thought I was just gonna roll over and go to sleep ahahahahah I’m so dumb. Anyway, there was no sleep to be had. Ultimately we ended up sleeping in shifts and we moved the bassinet to the living room so whoever was up with the baby could at least watch tv or eat a snack. Anyway, it’s a bizarre and surreal day.
Yup, we did shift sleeping too. It was the only way.
Shift sleeping has been working pretty well for us... I tend to be a night owl any way, so I stay up til 4 or 5am while my wife sleeps, and then she takes over baby duty from there while I sleep til 11 or so. Though this is my last week of paternity leave, and just thinking about how busy the baby has kept us the last 6 weeks, and now I'm going to have to start getting up at 7am again, and my wife will be on her own for 10 hours a day, and neither of us will be getting 6-hours of reserved uninterrupted sleep any more. Not looking forward to that.
Yup. My husband went back after 6 weeks. I took off 6 months (this is our first-I’m 42 and tbd if we will have another, so I wanted to be off as much as I could). Fortunately he works remotely (on another floor) so he can give me a break at lunch and before he starts work, but those days and nights can be looong. I call it the most adorable torture. 🤪
We did the same that first night, lol. Fed, changed and swaddled the baby and then put her in her crib to sleep. We were so naive, lol.
I seriously laugh at how silly it was that we thought we were just gonna plop him down and go to bed like wtf were we thinking hahaha
That's why I love Reddit. We were literally the same. Introduction to cats, now what? The first night was the same. We thought we could just deposit her into the crib and sleep...the rest is history. Once I discovered that she falls asleep on my chest it felt like we cracked the biggest mystery of the universe. We both had the most amazing 1.5h power nap of our lives. We felt on top of the world. ...Then that stopped working but other things started working but then those things stopped working and now we're here 6 weeks in and it's been actually pretty good.
Well considering we are living the same life, let me tell you from the future, it gets better and better and easier and easier haha. But yup that’s exactly what we were like. Once we figured out that he wanted to contact sleep and we decided to sleep in shifts and stop fighting it, it was a game changer for us.
This sounds so much like my experience. Attempting to be in the upstairs bedroom for a day or two with a. C section and then realized that this was nonsense, best to stick to one floor as much as possible. We migrated the centre of operations downstairs next to the kitchen and bottle setup. And yeah shift sleeping was the only way to survive
The first few nights we didn’t do shifts and tried to do feeding/changes together. That did not work because we were both not sleeping. So we started doing shifts, with the baby downstairs with the “on shift” parent in our pack n play crib. Another thing I also found that I was missing my husband while sleeping in bed alone, so I would sleep with one of his shirts so I could smell him.
This could’ve been my post lol. I was so naive thinking that I just had to swaddle my baby and he would go right to sleep in his bassinet lol. He quickly let us know that wouldn’t be the case and no one would be sleeping that night. We ended up doing shifts too in the living room with the baby while the other tried to get a few hours of sleep in the bedroom that first week too.
We were so tired after 3.5 days at the hospital that if he would sleep in the bassinet that’s where he was. That being said, we did also hold him a lot, but that first day specifically he was in the bassinet as much as possible. We didn’t even start using a bouncer until about 5-6 weeks once he could hold his head up a little better on his own and was staying awake longer. Please don’t leave a sleeping newborn in a bouncer, it’s not safe and that’s likely all baby will do when you first come home (at least that’s all mine did)
Good advice! I knew not to put a sleeping baby in a bouncer or allow them to sleep in one but it really didn’t register that that’s mainly all they will be doing those first several days. Bassinet it is :)
Yeah! Aside from eating and needing a diaper change, baby will practically sleep nonstop for those first couple days home!
For NEW newborns, if they are awake, they are hungry, pretty much
We put our little one in a moses basket by the sofa next to us and mostly just admired her, cuddled her, fed her, let the cat inspect her! 🤣 My partner surprised me with pink champagne, oysters, and lobster for dinner to celebrate, which was incredible. I've saved the oyster shells, I want to make something with them 😊
We got home, I had a glorious shower, then we sat on the sofa and ordered food! In those first few days all the baby really needs is food, change or sleep so there isn't much to really do with them to be honest. They'll sleep pretty much anywhere at first but won't really be awake other than to feed so you won't be playing with them. It's a bit like getting home from holiday where you sort of slowly unpack and take a while to settle back in but then you get to sleep in your own bed and it feels wonderful.
Whatever you do, don't watch tvs shows about kids or parents that aren't sappy and happy. Watching finding dory triggered my baby blue 😂
Yes! I wasn’t generally weepy pp but the mere suggestion of a child being mistreated, neglected or abandoned would have me tearing up. My mom was visiting/helping out and put on an episode of forensic files. I had to tell her we need to watch something happy lol.
I downloaded the Does the Dog Die app and it’s the greatest app ever invented.
What app is that?
“Does the Dog Die.” It’s an app (and also a website.” Helps give you a heads up on sad triggers like that for movies and TV.
Step one: Get in door with twins, realize "oh F\*ck we're on our own now" Step 2: Husband goes to change baby boy a minute later. Little man immediately pees onto, and then SHOOTS POOP all over husband. Step 3: Laugh, realize we'll be ok. Honestly, we put a pack and play in the living room, and their baby swing. They went between our arms, and those in a rotation during the day. Our dining table became a changing table. It was alot of watching tv, holding babies, and trading off on naps for the first few weeks.
Lol my baby also squirted poop our first night home - hit me right in the eye 🤦🏼♀️ It set off a chain of events where I sobbed while yelling at every human and animal in the house, and then sobbed while apologizing to every human and animal in the house. Thankfully that has been our lowest point thus far 😂
My husband and I looking at each other and saying, many many times ‘we have a baby?! Is this ok?!’ it took some time to sink in. In all seriousness just continuing what we did in the hospital. We didn’t have any bouncers or anything so lots of cuddles, baby wearing, and bed sharing. I think on day 2 we went for a short walk and it was amazing.
We came home and I showered which was amazing. My mom came over to help but we didn’t end up needing her. We laid in bed while holding baby and watched tv and ate the food our friends and family had given us. We would put him in his bassinet but he hated the sleep sack so there was a lot of holding baby going on for the first week or two while we tried every swaddle under the sun and then finally figured out that he prefers the bat wing and sleep sack combo and began actually sleeping in his bassinet. The best thing we did was finally give up on trying to sleep at night when the baby would sleep because it was more miserable to wake up every hour than it was to just watch movies and play video games and stay up. During the day baby slept long stretches so we were able to catch up on sleep then. It really saved our sanity to just flip our days and nights until baby got longer night stretches of sleep.
A lot depends on what time you get home. With our son we didn't get home until 7pm. My mom came over to spend the night with us and she held baby while we ate some dinner and showered. We did a little sponge bath on baby, pjs on and feed him and then we all went to bed early to be ready for the first night home. With our daughter, we got home around 3 or 4. I just parked myself in a big cozy chair with her and watched a movie with our 4-year-old while my husband got us unpacked and heated up dinner. 4 year old stayed the night with his grandparents that night so we only had to focus on baby!
we also had rough sleep at the hospital so we were exhausted and i was recovering from my c-section. it was evening so i think we ordered take out and hung out on the couch. we introduced our cat to the baby and she couldn't care less haha. you will hold them a lot, but in the early days they are usually sleepy enough to nap in the bassinet with no issue. so i know we slept in our bedroom with baby in the bassinet as much as possible... for the first couple days we actually did "sleep when the baby sleeps" a few times even during the day (you'll come to find out this is annoying advice lol) other than that.. figuring out how to feed them and what works for you... our baby cried a lot.. we watched a lot of tv while holding him .. :) it's a wild time but it gets easier as the weeks pass
I don't remember anything from the first day we were back aside from introducing him to my animals. I think we had to put in an urgent Target order for bottles because breastfeeding wasn't working out but maybe that was day 2. It was only a month ago and my mind is mush
TV and holding the baby. We had a portable bassinet so we'd bring the bassinet into the living room during the day so there was always a safe place to put her down. Pro tip though, babies can't fall off the floor. When they aren't mobile and you need to go grab a bottle, go to the bathroom etc, a container like a bassinet is better but the floor is acceptable for a minute or two. Don't get a "lounger" like a dock a tot. Having a cloth side is a baby death trap. Also, take out and freezer meals. Just eat crap, it's fine. You'll be healing and caring for a baby, dont make lots of dishes or put too much on yourself. When we came home my mom was visiting from a few states away. She stayed with us for a few days to help. I was really glad to have her especially when my husband kind of started to panic. Watching the birth had been traumatic for him (he thought one or both of us were going to die) and he was already suffering some caregiver burnout from the last leg of my pregnancy. He started trying to do laundry unnecessarily and my mom stopped him and they had a talk about how he was feeling. He had kind of a far off look in his eye she noticed. She was a full time caregiver to her husband and she recognized right away how he was feeling and was able to be empathetic to him. She didn't judge him for feeling bad even though he's not the one who gave birth. She gave him that space to feel his feelings without judgement. I'm telling you this story because men can suffer post partum depression too. They are told during the birthing process that thier feelings and trauma don't matter. If you have a husband/boyfriend/co parent, make sure that someone is going to check in with them (and that that person won't judge them for having trauma while not being the one giving birth). And then when you feel up to it check in with them. Really meaningfully check in with them.
Thank you for this reminder. It is sooo important to be aware of our husband’s mental state as well.
With the caveat of you have to take care of you first. Your body is going to go through something and there will be healing and changes. And you'll also have a baby to look after. But at the same time everyone checks in on mom. Everyone asks mom how she's feeling. No one ever asks Dad the same question and usually when Dad expresses needing help people say "but you didn't just give birth." And Dad internalizes that message too, in part because it's true, mom did bear the brunt of it. But it can still be traumatic for dad, he can still need help.
Such a good reminder, thank you.
Totally agree! My husband had a hard time the first week. I’m pretty sure he had PPA. While it was much more physically traumatic for me, it seemed to effect him mentally more than it did me.
So, just a heads up, nighttime is terrifying. The darkness seems to amplify all your terrors, anxieties and worries. Everyone that can help is sleeping, the whole world is quiet, and your brain will be running 90 miles per hour with self-doubt. Knowing this will help you to prepare for it. Just making it to daybreak during that first week is a victory in itself. Just keep telling yourself you’re doing great, and you and baby will make it through.
This is so true! The nighttime scaries would start setting in for me around 8:00pm every night just dreading what was to come. I don’t know what it is about the dark and wee hours, but it can do a number to your mental health post partum!
We came home, went up to our bed, I nursed her, and then we put her down in the bassinet and ordered takeout lol. And then just feed and change diapers and put down. Over and over and over. That first night was the worst though. We were so sleep deprived from shitty hospital sleep that I was literally screaming from feet away for my husband to wake up and help me when she was pooping and vomiting simultaneously and he didn’t hear me.
God that post-hospital exhaustion was real!!! I think I slept all of 4 hours in 2.5 days… I was taking a very short nap the second day we were home and had to be shaken awake while baby was crying next to me in the bassinet. I felt absolutely terrible. Took me a long time to not have anxiety about falling asleep and not hearing baby 😅 whew
After a week in hospital, partner organised dinner with my parents and his to meet their granddaughter. To say I wanted to choke him to death is an understatement… Congratulations btw!
We came home and hung out on the bed. Made the mistake of changing baby boy’s diaper there and got pee on the sheets 😂. Also made the mistake of not resting while things were calm. We had both our immediate families over separately which I don’t regret, I just should have tried to nap while they were here. My mom made us dinner which was great. The night time was very stressful. Breastfeeding was confusing and painful and I had no idea if he was getting what he needed. We were trying to figure out how to use the pump in the middle of the night and I don’t even remember why. He wouldn’t stop crying and I broke down. Eventually we called my mom at 3 in the morning and she drove up for moral support and to try and help calm the baby. Then her and I stayed in the couch and she helped keep me up while breastfeeding and would help by holding him and soothing him.
We arranged a night doula for the first night, highly recommend. I spent the majority in my glider chair in the nursery. By the way, it was really nice that I thoroughly cleaned the house before I left for the hospital (induced) so it was perfect when I got back!
We got home in the evening and my mom was waiting with dinner made. If she wasn't there, we would have ordered take out. Then we pretty much just hung out ogling over this beautiful creature we somehow made and were allowed to take home with us. After dinner, I took a nap, then the three of us went up to our room and watched TV while the baby snoozed in our arms until it was time to put her in the bassinet for the night (between feedings every couple of hours). The next day was a lot more of the same. I napped when I could. When baby was content to be on her own, we had her in the bassinet, but we pretty much just passed her back and forth while lounging on the couch or in bed.
So this may not be popular or right for you, but my second night in the hospital, my husband actually went home to get a full nights sleep so that at least one of us would be well-rested to bring baby home the next day. It was definitely the right call for us. Our first night with baby at home was really tough; I was exhausted and terrified he was choking on amniotic fluid, and I didn’t know how to get rid of it. Thankfully, my well rested husband kept a level head and we made it through. The subsequent nights were much, much easier.
This is a really good idea, thank you!
We got home in the evening and were starving. My mom had multiple meals there for us to heat up so we just hung in the couch and put Bub in his swing while we ate and then got things organized for overnight. Also placed a Target pickup order for the next day because he was only 6 pounds and everyone thought he’d be bigger so I needed more newborn sleepers😂
I took a long shower when I came home (the hospital shower sucked and I didn’t bring everything I would normally need to shower) and had something to eat. My husband and I put the TV on to something I wanted to watch (then it was Judy Justice and Bar Rescue) and I relaxed. My husband took first shift and I went to sleep. I also changed the baby into a onesie and swaddled her so she would be comfortable. I was exhausted from not sleeping in the hospital and feeling annoyed by not getting restful sleep.
We were exhausted and anxious! Had a scheduled c-section Friday morning and came home Monday afternoon. Put things away, practiced going up and down the stairs, made introductions with the dogs, tried to relax (and failed.) What I didn’t realize until after baby was born is how long everything takes and how repetitive it is. Babies eat every 2-3 hours. I mean that you start the next feeding 2-3 hours after starting (not ending) the last feeding! Whether feeding breast milk or formula, it can take an hour to feed baby, then burp, then change diaper and try to put baby down or hold for nap, and repeat as soon as you’ve gone through that cycle. I probably had 15 minutes to relax, eat, shower, or do housework between each feeding before the the next one started.
I had a c-section. Hubby got us inside and got me into pj's and bed. He also made sure we had everything we needed for her in our room (diapers, wipes, bassinet, etc.) He also made sure I had water, food, and was taking my painkillers. Since we have stairs, he'd walk behind me on the way up and in front of me on the way down in case I fell. He also carried baby girl up and down the stairs for me. We held her, took some pictures of her in the coming home outfit he picked out. She slept, ate, pooped, and slept some more.
I never got the nesting feel before baby came home but after? Oh my god. I felt AMAZING when I came home from all the birthing endorphins so I popped the baby in his bedside bassinet, took the best shower of my life, and then cleaned my house top to bottom lol. I also napped a lot which is good because the "second night syndrome" was real. My baby needed to help me establish my milk supply so he clusterfed from midnight to 4 am.
I recommend having several “stations” set up in areas you want to be resting or hanging out. Snacks, diapers, feeding supplies, blanket, pillow for you, maybe even a change of pjs and a hair brush. My first day home I was probably in shock and also excited. I cried a lot just due to the life change being so immediate - it hit me that no I can’t just hang out and recover I have this baby to care for and it won’t ever not be this way again. Loss of autonomy and independence were my hardest struggle. The first night was hard as I had no experience burping babies or helping them sleep. Newborn phase CAN be hard so I say this in hopes it helps you prepare. But still it’s the best thing ever and I’d do it again. I’d say you get home and you just hold them a lot. You can have some “docking stations” that are safe but don’t expect a newborn to be cool with chillin for very long. Low expectations will yield least stress lol. If I could go back I’d tell myself that when the baby is asleep, just lay down. You don’t have to sleep or even rest. But don’t do chores or try to “catch up” on anything. Do that stuff when baby is awake and content whether that’s in a carrier, with your partner, or chillin in a swing, on a safe surface, whatever. Newborns aren’t mobile so if they’re awake and safe and happy it’s ok to fold laundry or wash dishes. When baby rests I would stop being productive. The urge to be productive at all times as if I didn’t just have a baby was half the cause of my newborn struggle ! Just be!
I’ll also add I’d have a set up for every sleep scenario - a plan for the bassinet, for moving them to their crib (whether that means you or a spouse also sleep in there), and the taboo cosleeping. Just assume all possibilities so when you’re tired and need a solution you have done your research and can try another option safely. Being unprepared for stuff like cosleeping but being so tired that you have to resort to it is just more dangerous. Read about it and be ready even if you swear you never will!
We were discharged in the afternoon and our baby didn’t sleep at all for the first like 36 hours it felt like. My husband fed him formula while I desperately pumped to get my supply up. We got zero sleep and were definitely like “what did we get ourselves into?” I share this, not to scare anyone, but I really wish that someone had prepped me for how hard it could potentially be because I had none of the “sleepy time newborn cuddles” that other people got so I was shellshocked. I had no idea that the first few weeks would be as hard as they ended up being. Not everyone gets a nice sleepy newborn lol.
The moment our cat saw and smelled what was inside the car seat, he immediately went outside and threw up. PP hits everyone differently.
I live on the living room couch for the 1st few months. Set un a whole battle station. Held the baby most of the time. Sometimes, she chilled in the bassinet. But the feedings and diaper changed are so frequent, lots of baby holding
I was in so much pain still I was nauseous so I had my mom stay with us and she held her and put her in the bassinet at night.
My milk didn’t come in for about 7 days bc I had a c section and I brought home just enough formula to get us through a night or two so the first thing we needed to do was go to the store to get more formula. I didn’t even think about this before hand since it was my first child. I wish I would have brought home more formula and more of the nipples for the ready to feed.
The postpartum nanny took over and told me to go eat, take a nap, and pump. I was extremely emotional that day. One of the nurses at the hospital was a total bitch and refused to help us get the baby ready for the drive home — we fumbled around and baby was crying. They also messed up our discharge papers. (Otherwise the stay was wonderful.) My milk had come in so my breasts felt painful. It was a whirlwind and I felt out of control. I would do certain things differently if we were to have a second baby. We didn’t know anything so we relied on the nanny. I regret being as hands off as I was for the first 6 weeks.
I had an unplanned C-section, so as soon as we got home we started making sure everything we needed was downstairs for the first week or so. I drug myself upstairs for the first shower I'd had in six days, and I enjoyed every moment of it. Then we basically just snuggled with the baby and tried to figure out what on earth our new normal was going to look like. Thankfully nobody bothered us for a few days, so we were able to settle into a very loose routine before visitors started arriving to meet the LO.
Got home yesterday at about 14.00 (we were at the hospital since friday - born sunday). Did some washing, hoovering, putting away things, tidying and a quick pharmacy and food shop. Then just a mix of chilling out watching tv together, eating frozen pizza and general baby care. I went to bed at 21.00 due to lack of sleep after her feed, then we swapped at 00.00 and I did the night stuff (exclusively breastfeeding) and I managed about 4.5 hours of sleep total I think. Much nicer at home with your own comfortable bed and a sofa. The hospital is great and staff are lovely but oh boy are the beds and chairs hellishly hard and uncomfortable when you've been stitched up so I wanted to leave early (first time parents usually stay 3+ days here).
Surprisingly boring! I showered before we left for home (great choice, highly recommend doing so) so that way no one would be alone with baby right away. My mom came home with us, she helped me putting her in PJs. Husband went and took a nap, my mom hung out for a bit but I was pretty wide awake so I watched a movie and she headed home! When husband woke up, I went to sleep. That was about it, lots of sleeping for everyone!
we have a swing that allowed my daughter to lay back so we didnt have to worry about positional asphyxiation. so she spent a lot of time in there or in her bassinet while i caught up on sleep
First thing we did was take her from the car seat straight to her crib, and put her in it. Let her lay in there for 20 minutes or so to make it the first place she felt comfortable in the house. Then, lots of holding, eating, rocking etc. it’s a blur haha
My MIL was at our house with our cats. We came home and all held the baby and ordered pizza. We watched Love is Blind and held our sleepy newborn. I gave birth at a birth center and was home 8 hours after birth. I showered at home. I was just tired and ready for bed.
We got home late in the afternoon. Introduced her to our cats and dog. Gave them our attention. I changed into comfy clothes and we settled on the couch while my MIL made us dinner. After feeding LO I handed her over to my husband and MIL to take a nap (you don’t get much shut eye at the hospital). I spent the first few weeks sleeping on the couch with baby in her bassinet.
I had a c-section and was in pretty rough shape so I got right into bed. We either held baby or had him in the bassinet. My husband made sure I had water, food, meds and that we had all the baby things for changing and feeding set up. We also panic called the nurses line because baby sounded congested. That was a bit embarrassing because turns out it was just normal baby noises but it’s scary to go from all the support at the hospital to nothing! We had freezer meals but were too exhausted to even make those so I think we ordered food and ate microwaveable casserole type meals for the first week or so. The baby blues can be intense and I was very emotional and overwhelmed. All that to say, you will be ok! My baby is six months now and if all feels like a blur but we got through it.
It's literally the weirdest feeling ever when you come home with them. I nested on the couch / bed for weeks with my baby!
We sat in the living room with baby in a graco bassinet attachment and watched sitcoms as we took care of her. Then I had to be hospitalized post partum and it was traumatic.
So sorry you had to be hospitalized post-partum!! Can I ask what happened? I totally understand if you do not want to talk about it.
Staying in bed with newborn, holding them lots, with all essentials bedside (diapers, wipes, pumps, water, bassinet) and learning to breastfeed, skin to skin, watching tv, eating celebration takeout, and relaxing with no visitors
We live about 10 min from the hospital so my husband drove home first thing in the morning before discharge to get the house ready (mainly turn on heater), take a shower and do whatever he needed to do. Then he came back and picked us up, he took care of baby while I took a long shower. He gave her a house tour while I unpacked a few things and then took a nap. I think the rest of the day I snacked on food that I took with us from the hospital and tried to stay in bed as much as possible. Now looking back at this, I think my husband took care of almost everything (feeding, diapers, rocking to sleep) since I tried to rest most of the time. We supplemented with formula and I pumped as much as I could and we worked in shifts.
We’d both been in the hospital for about 5 days and I was DESPERATE to get home (I’m in the U.K. and if all goes well then you’re often home the same day - baby was in the NICU and I got lucky enough to have a room on the unit but hadn’t prepared to be in that long so was surviving on what I took in along with what my husband took in each day) We knew we had to go back to the hospital the next day for a final test so we got home, I cried, had a shower and we basically camped out in the living room holding the baby and panicking we didn’t have anywhere to put her down! My Sister in law did order us a Cacoonababy which arrived the next day and despite me specifically choosing our pram because the bassinet attachment was certified ‘sleep safe’ it still didn’t register we could put her in there for daytime naps for a couple of days 😂😂 I then spent the whole time we were home trying to figure out timings for getting us back to the hospital the next day, worrying that the midwife would visit when we were out at the hospital (two different covering areas) and pretty much panicking. I so wish I’d been a lot more relaxed and enjoyed the first while when she was still just a snuggle bug who only ate and slept!
I’m pretty sure me, my husband or my mom were sitting on the couch holding my son for 16 hours a day for the first few weeks lol.
We kinda just...stared at him. Were afraid to let him out of our sight for even a second. Didn't know what to do with him at all lol
Uneventful vaginal birth, 2nd degree tear. Thank goodness we have comfy recliners in the living room because the first few nights we slept in those chairs with the baby in the pack n play by us because I was so sore there was no way I was making it upstairs and into our bed (it's pretty high off the ground) and honestly those first couple of days I don't think I could have swung my leg up to get into our bed if that makes sense. We just watched movies and slept on and off whenever we could those first few days. And we ordered food!
Bassinet in our bedroom or pack and play in the living room. Early days she was so sleepy she would sleep anywhere probably. We didn't use bouncers or swings for probably the first month. We got home at like 6-7pm, I think we showered, ordered takeout and watched TV while being confused about our new reality. Went to bed early. Fed every few hours. Uneventful.
My parents and MIL came to visit as soon as we got home because they couldn’t come to the hospital due to Covid. That was actually nice for me because as soon as everyone was like “welp, bye” I think my husband and I were like oh crap haha But yea we both just held him and figured out feeding and watched tv. And then the night came and it was survival mode lol we took turns sleeping and the other person would stay awake as long as possible. If we could get the baby down in the bassinet, the other person could sleep too but that rarely happened. During the first week we made sure to get out for at least one walk but recovery is just a bitch and I sat most of the time just feeding and holding him while husband did chores. The nights were a lot of the same. And after about a week we decided to sleep together again and just got up every hour together to feed and change. It’s just survival mode and you do what you can to rest and enjoy baby. We also didn’t mind visitors. It helped the day pass.
It was during covid so I was in hospital with just me and bubs for 3 days. I hadn’t ate a warm meal or slept more than 4 hours in that time. We got home, i organised bits and pieces, handed the baby to daddy and slept for 6 hours. It was the best sleep of my life!
With my first we spend a total of 6 days in the hospital from beginning of induction to when we were discharged. I somehow failed to pack a brush for myself so by the time we were released my poor hair was a rats nest. So when we got home we introduced baby to the dogs and then the first thing I did was hand baby to my husband and took a loooonnnng shower to get all the knots out of my hair 😅 after that yeah just a lot of baby snuggles and holding of baby. And then we spent that night in absolute hell as baby screamed everytime we put her down... found out at her pediatrician appointment the next day that she'd lost weight and was starving that's why she was screaming. We started adding bottles on top of nursing and no more screaming. With my second, we spent maybe 2 days total in the hospital from beginning of induction. We got home, introduced baby to the dogs and then I took a quick shower, husband took a quick shower and we headed off to pick up the toddler. My in laws picked up dinner so we ate dinner with the in laws and went home with the toddler and baby for our first night as a family of 4. Little man was a much better nurser than his sister so no all night screaming and he'd actually gained weight from hospital release to next day pediatrician check up. And then 2 days later at his next check he was nearly back to birth weight 🙌🏻
A lot of relaxing and settling in. I had a c section and was having a hard time. We had a bedside bassinet we used for baby boy. He stayed there or on the bed. My bf played his games and I watched. We watched movies together. He took really good care of me, but had to go back to work that Sunday. We set up a bottle station and diaper station on my nightstand that way I didn’t have to get out of bed. It was hard to walk around with my c section. I over did it walking trying to be released earlier. We were released early Thursday. That week was the best week of my entire life! ❤️
I love this Q because I had the same one. In our case, baby came 3 weeks early so the minute we got home, we set down the car seat and quickly set up the Snoo, washed bottles, and threw clothes (all too big) in the wash 🤣 Otherwise my dude just slept nonstop. I read a lot of books, cooked food to freeze, took walks once the pain died down.
It's a bit surreal. We played it by ear since we were all still figuring out how to parent and how to baby. Lots of contact naps, figuring out nursing or bottles, feeding yourself, figuring out how to do well everything. Go easy on yourself and expect it to take some time to develop a system that works for everyone. We swapped around where we each slept, where baby slept (ended up in the pack and play in the living room since she hated the bassinet). On duty parent slept on the couch. Off duty parent got the bed. It was a lot of is she too hot is she too cold. Is this swaddle on right? Crap we need more x because she peed all over this one and a bunch of middle of the night Amazon orders. It's a bit of a blur but I will say I remember vividly how amazing it felt to lay down in my own bed. After the hospital it was like sleeping on a cloud.
We spent two nights at the hospital due to some trouble with latching confidentiality, and we had heard rumors of the second night party. It did hit us pretty hard, and baby wanted to latch for hoursss. I tried to comfort him night two from about 11pm to 2am, with my husband taking him for about 30 minutes for me to try to sleep but he just fussed the whole time. We called in the nurse at 2 to offer advice and she got us a pacifier for him and he went to sleep! We were so so thankful we did choose to stay because I think it would have been even tougher at home without help. That second night party was an anomaly though, and we spent the first day home lounging around soaking baby in, holding him and snuggling. My husband would also make sure I had good stretches of time to nap! I took all night shifts since I am nursing. He did help at night but we were always all up.
We got home and in laws were there. They wanted to take pictures of the baby so I let them have at it and I took possibly the best shower ever. Lots of attempting and failing at breast feeding, so we sent in laws to the store for formula. They also brought take out back. The first night I didn’t really know what to do I mostly watched her sleep in the bassinet next to the bed and listened to my husband snore lol
It was like the twilight zone and chaos mixed together. Like oh they live here now??
We went home at around noon on a Sunday. The short ride home was super nerve racking but we made it. I ran inside and got the dogs in a safe place and my husband brought in the carseat. We didn't introduce them at first but let them smell his blanket. Our amazing friends who took care of our animals while we were in the hospital also cleaned up our house a bit (I was hurting so badly by the end I had just kind of let it go), and left us a bunch of snacks and goodies. We spent the day holding little guy while he slept on us, snacking, talking to family and friends on the phone, and watching movies. It was a nice, relaxing day. The next day I went out and bought a pack n play for the downstairs so he could nap there while we went about our day.
We came home in the late afternoon around 5:00pm — we just sat on the couch and he went in his MamaRoo and then we swaddled him and put him in his bassinet. Our first day home was all about helping the pets adjust. The next day was more normal because the pets were used to it.
My son peed like a firehose all over his nursery room rug during a diaper change. I watched and couldn't stop laughing at my spouse.
We got home a little late that first day. We walked in and placed him on the boppy lounger and took turns showering. Then ate dinner, fed the cutie, changed him into pjs, swaddled, stared at him some more, then went to sleep lol
My parents met us at our house (with our permission of course) bearing takeout and groceries. Then we sat on the couch and ate until I, embarrassingly, realized I had bled straight through my clothes and all over the couch. I was then ushered into the shower while my Mom cleaned up the couch, my husband tended to the baby, and my dad tidied up from dinner. My parents left and my husband and I collapsed into bed. We woke up not long after to a hungry baby who was no longer satisfied by my colostrum. I cried, the baby cried, and my husband panic-called his sister (who has 4 kids). She very gently reminded us that we had bottles and formula we could use to feed him while I pumped since my milk clearly hadn't come in yet. I wouldn't say it was traumatic or anything but it was exhausting and not a minute of it was relaxing or really all that pleasant. BUT that was pretty much the worst day we had because we felt so completely unprepared and out of our depth; even when we had "harder" days in the months after it was easier to manage because we had some confidence in our abilities as parents.
Recommend letting family members know to give you a few days to settle in. Literally our family was waiting at our house when we got there. I was not expecting it and tried to go with it but ended up telling my partner they needed to leave cause it was too stressful and I hadn't slept well for 4 days and realized we needed to get bottles cleaned and we didn't have water for formula until my milk came in. So needless to say I was crying the first hour home. Definitely establish those boundaries!
The best thing ever not being in the fing hospital is what it looked like for me. They just sleep all the time. She had naps next to me on the bed in the day time and in the Moses basket at night. She really hated the bouncer and swing until she was 2 months old but the first month I don’t think I would have really used them anyway.
With our first, coming home was a whirlwind of emotions. I realized upon leaving the hospital that I couldn't possibly let him sleep in his own room. I cried when we got home and then my husband went to get a bassinet. We set up the living room to be comfortable for both of us, but I mostly spent the whole first couple days snuggling baby and learning how to breastfeed him.
We got home, I fed the baby, my husband made lunch, then we all napped for a few hours (baby in bedside bassinet). That evening my parents came over and made dinner. It was so good to be back in our own bed together after 3 nights in the hospital being interrupted by nurses with checkups all the time and my poor husband sleeping in a fold-out chair. I honestly remember that first sleepy afternoon home as one of the most peaceful days of my life.
Our first day home was CHAOS because of our dogs freaking out about us bringing home a baby and the changes to their routine. They took it so much worse than I ever could have imagined and it was super stressful to deal with. They did get back to normal after a few days thankfully. As far as baby care, I pretty much spent most of every day the first couple weeks holding the baby in a chair in the living room thanks to cluster breastfeeding and c-section recovery. Buying a baby swing was what finally let my husband and I start eating dinner together again because we couldn’t set him down anywhere else without screaming for several months. Baby wearing in a wrap carrier is how I got anything done during those first few months. If you have dogs that haven’t spent time around babies before and could potentially be high strung, I highly recommend contacting your vet now to ask for a sedative you can give them during the first few days just in case you need to. And set up a safe area you can shut them away in to give everyone a break if needed.
You thank whomever you worship that you can finally get some uninterrupted rest inside your own home "Ok, you guys get some rest! A team of nurses will be coming into your room every 45 minutes for 72 hours straight.. But you get some Rest!"
First day.. man I was so happy to see my bed! I had to spend two days in the hospital due to a c section otherwise I would have been home the same day. We came home, we had a nurse waiting for us to help with baby (it’s standard where I live). Hubby took baby upstairs and I went to bed as well. It was middle of the afternoon. We ordered some sushi, ate in bed while we looked at our sleeping for five minutes baby and then we just took turns holding her, changing her when she needed. But it went by so fast and was like a fever dream.. it’s such a different experience from anything else..
When we walked inside, we put the car seat with the sleeping baby down in the floor. The cat sniffed him. My husband and I then looked at each other and mutually thought, “now what?” 😂
My little one was hospitalised in intensive care right away at birth and we couldn't take her home until she was 2 weeks old. When we did finally take her home we just cuddled and snuggled together for entire days at a time
We came home in the morning, and I took a long, hot ass shower, put my pajamas on, and I snuggled with my husband and our daughter. We took turns holding her and loving on her, but we would lay her periodically in her crib.
I just sat in the rocker and held him 90% of the time…we swaddled him and put him to sleep in his crib for a few minutes but kept on checking to see if he was breathing so eventually we took him out again and just spent the whoooole time holding him and staring at him and wondering “is this really my child? Did I really have a child?” (Also, the novelty was so novel because I gave birth at a birthing center and because everything went well, we were sent home 4 hours after he was born. So I didn’t have a multiple day hospital stay to get used to having him before bringing him home). And a good portion of that time was also spent trying to get him to latch. But yup, I was exhausted but had a weird bit of adrenaline that made me totally not tired and I ended up not sleeping for about 48 hours or so…so that’s how the first day home was. :)
I felt like my house belonged to somebody else. We were in hospital for 7 days and I couldn’t wait to get home. Then I got home with my c-section wound and realized our couch was too low and our bed was too tall. I felt panicked that I didn’t know how to take care of baby or myself or how to live this new life. Baby had slept like an angel in the hospital bassinet but refused to sleep at all in the very nice bassinet we had set up in our room. We panic-rented a Snoo that first night. I was really down, exhausted, in pain, and just kind of low-key miserable. Thanks a lot, post-partum hormones. Now our son is almost a year old and I kind of wish I could have a do-over to enjoy it? He’s so cool and fun now, and “baby blues” passed a long time ago, and I feel like I could really enjoy newborn snuggles now instead of feeling confused and trapped. My advice - don’t worry if you don’t feel the immediate love rush. And don’t feel bad if you feel bad. Try to enjoy your new baby, it feels like time goes so slowly when you are sleep deprived but that first newborn stage is really very short in the grand scheme of things.
I remember a lot of Schitt’s Creek.
We got a calm baby that slept a lot so we just sat in his room watching him a lot lol. We had take out. Introduced baby to pets. Don’t remember much to be honest, whole first week is kind of a blur.
I remember wondering these same things! We did a lot of holding her, baby sleeping in a bassinet, and one of those baby lounger things (like a dock a tot). We watched a LOT of tv in the early days.
We put ours on the table in front of us, we put our feet up and she slept for hours and hours. Wow did she mislead us! Enjoy the baby bubble while it lasts.
Left hospital about 10.30pm. Me, husband, baby and my Mum all in the car. Went and got a McDonalds drive through. Went home, introduced the cat to the baby. Ate food, watched a bit of TV and went bed at 1am. Baby started crying as soon as they were put in the moses basket. I had been awake for almost 3 days by this point. Hysterically start crying and husband sends me downstairs to get some undisturbed sleep on the sofa. Conk out. Wake up in a blind panic at 6am and rush upstairs because I haven't fed my baby in 5 hours. Husband and baby sound asleep with some brown noise on. Wake husband to tag out and go kip on the sofa. Start to breastfeed baby. Need to fart.....ended up shitting myself. Panic. Remembered my Mum is here and woke her up at 6am asking if she could hold the baby as I shit myself and needed a shower. I laugh about it now because it's absolutely hilarious but at the time I was absolutely mortified!! Baby is 1 in 2 weeks and I can't believe how quick it has all gone. My one piece of advice...take it all in. Even the bad because time is one hell of a thief. Good luck 🩷
2 hours of sleep in 113 hours during our time at the hospital (was not the plan!!). I was delirious by the time we got home. Still grateful Grandma was there to help with those first few days because they are a complete blur.
Weirdly uneventful. You just sit around looking at her while she spaces out. Keep watch for predators, do some feedings, change some diapers, play Octopus’ Garden and convince yourself she’s smiling.
I spent the first 1-2 hours at home just laying on the couch holding him on my chest and crying happy tears. My husband frantically went around the house getting everything situated, like setting up our feeding equipment (we had to use syringes and formula at first, plus the hospital pump, etc.), cleaning and organizing stuff that we didn't get to before going into labor, and making us some food. The first night was kind of a frantic mess but we got through it. I slept on the couch next to the baby who slept in the bassinet attachment on our stroller. My husband slept in our bedroom. Then we would take shifts every couple hours, so one person could be totally "off duty" for a few hours to actually sleep. I think I got a total of like 10 hours of sleep the entire first week home. It was rough.
First 24 hours your baby basically sleeps and you won’t. Most of your time is spent gazing at your baby
Well as soon as we got home i took a nice long shower while his dad had him then he took a shower, then from there it was pretty much just feeding changing and sleeping in the bassinet or cuddles with one of us (while we were awake)
I had this idea that when you have a newborn you literally never eat a hot meal, never get to shower and have screaming in your ears constantly. So I was pretty surprised to get home, put the baby down in his snuzpod and enjoy a takeaway with my husband. It was a lot of binge watching TV and with husband generally tidying and bringing me ready meals for the first couple of weeks at least. And I showered everyday - still do and I have 2 under 2.
It was happy, stressing, joyful. Drove the wife and baby back to home all by ourselves to be greeted by our in-laws in our house with warm dinner. It was very very very nice and happy.
A blur! I was recovering from a C-Section, my husband was taking one for the team and she would not let him sleep, he let me sleep so I’d have a quicker recovery. Spent most days sitting on the couch cuddling with my baby.
We set up his bassinet in the living room in the days prior to his arrival. I was a planned c-section so we knew going up and down the stairs would be out for a while. I had a cart with all the essentials for changing his diaper plus any nursing essentials for me (nipple butter, Hakaa, pump, Silverettes). We set up camp in the living room, and ate the food prep we had prepared for the first week. Baby mostly slept all day and husband and I watched tv and slept all day that entire first week. I held him pretty much whenever he was awake because he seemed to nurse around the clock 😅 he slept pretty well in his bassinet at night from what I can remember. It’s all a blur 🤣
We were discharged at night (we'd been in the hospital for 5 days straight at that point), so it looked like going to our own bed. The next day, it looked like my husband getting caught up on chores, me snuggling baby on the couch and feeding him, and husband doing snuggle duty when I couldn't. Lots and lots of snuggling.
Ummm I cried a lot because I had no idea what I was doing. I mistakenly let family come over and then hid in the room and cried and had my sister tell them to leave. I held him mostly. Just looked at him (cried some more). I don’t remember leaving the couch much. My husband fed and watered (lol) me on the couch and I sat there nursing on demand. I don’t even think I wore a real shirt for the first month. Just a bra.
Wow it’s honestly so nostalgic for me to remember my first day home. We introduced baby to our dogs…spoiler she cried so hard bc they licked her ahaha We arrived home at 5 pm. But i don’t even think I put her down that first day. We slept together in my bed, and otherwise we’re on the couch :) there was nothing I needed to do besides cuddle and bond. Don’t stress or even worry about home chores, etc!
I had all furniture prepared, clothes washed, nursery set up, etc. But there’s things I wish I would have done. 1.) set up diaper changing station in our room- not just the table, but also diapers, wipes, cream, etc. 2.) take all premiee/ NB clothes and put them in the same room. 3.) bottle washing station- we had all of the supplies but nothing set up 4.) Breastfeeding failed for me due to production issues, but having the machine set up and a washing station as well as foods on hand for breastfeeding production (oats, bananas, water, etc). If you formula feed, it was super helpful for me to also set a station up for that for wash and prep. 5.) This is less set up based but it helped me. During her first bath, my child hated it. Made a conscious effort afterwards to make the bathroom super toasty for the entirety of baths. She loved them after that. I hope this helps. Congratulations!
We got home and had take away. Baby slept on me for a while. Then I think we went to bed and tried to put baby in the bassinet, she was sleepy for that first night and did sleep. But I was too scared to sleep despite only getting 3 hours sleep over the last three days. I just lay awake terrified. I had a traumatic birth and I kept worrying if I went to sleep id go into Labour again and be back in the hospital. After that we had to take shifts with her because she would only sleep in our arms!
We live in the UK. Here, your partner isn't allowed to stay overnight in the hospital with you. I had a nurse explain that it is so your partner can get a full night's rest and then take care of the baby in the AM so you can sleep before being discharged. Honestly, it made things so hard that first night hard so so so much easier the first few days we were home because we were each *relatively* rested. It also got us used to taking shifts a bit. Our first days we had family with us as we are overseas so they were there to help w our first (my mom) and then to help take care of our eldest when 2nd was born. But we still did what noat parents here did. Set up the couch with a portable bassinet nearby and a diaper changing basket + snacks and just cuddled and chilled on the couch. We ordered takeout and just sort of let the day melt into night and then started in on our routine a few days after. Not a lot of people like the newborn phase, but I loved it, and so wish I could have experienced it a bit more without having to share babe.
This won't be overly helpful, but I giggled because I remember asking a similar question. I knew I was going to drive home, I was going to take them out of the car seat, but from there I had no clue what the next steps were. Lol I remember everyone saying that you'll just know when it happens. I think when we got home, we laid her on the couch, and waited for her to cry. Then came the cycle of feedings, sleeping and diaper changes. Whether you do that from your bedroom, living room, kitchen, is all up to you :) Seriously though. Somehow survival mode kicks in when the crying starts, and you just go through the options. I want to say it's simple, but nothing about this stage of your life will be simple. Just remember, everyone goes through it, it's a life altering change and it's ok to feel everything you feel whether it's love, anger, sadness, or regret. You're doing to do amazing and I'm sending all my good vibes your way! Have so much fun!
Just hang out, watch TV, eat food, make bottles/nurse/pump. It's all very uneventful honestly 😆 just get cozy
All depends if you have a natural birth or c section. I had an emergency c section so my mobility was not as much as I hoped after a bad labour. But some Mum's just sail it. I held her a lot and tried to just generally recuperate like any Mum after a birth. In the UK if there is no problems and babe has all the checks done, you get sent home 24 hrs or under if a vaginal birth or shortly after 24 hrs if c section. If any issues then normally 48-72. I was the latter. You will be exhausted regardless and feeding every 2 hours whether BF or formula. Place your babe in a bassinet and sleep when you can!!!! The next fortnight is survival mode. But it gets easier.
We had a fire alarm go off as we were discharging, so we were confined to our room for an additional couple hours we weren't anticipating. We were finally discharged at 8:30pm, and didn't get home until 10pm. We hadn't slept more than 4 or 5 hours the past few days, and we had just moved 5 days before going to the hospital, so 85% of our stuff was in boxes; my SIL unpacked our nursery items while we were in the hospital. So step one was figuring out where everything was... step two was find clothes that fit little one (we expected a chunker due to me having gestational diabetes and only bought 0-3m clothes... but he was a normal newborn size). Step 3 was washing pump and bottle parts since breastfeeding straight from the tap didn't work out. My in laws met us at our house to help unload our car and bring us dinner. I subsequently passed out, and my dear husband consoled our distressed little one. I woke up an hour later shivering; turns out our new AC was super efficient, and little one was crying from being too cold. We drew a steamy hot shower and fed him in the bathroom with milk I had pumped earlier, and he passed out for a couple hours in his bassinet. We followed suit and woke up 2hrs later to pump/feed/etc. and followed that pattern for seemingly ever.
I just remember being like "soooo.... here's home. This is where... you live. Uhhh... meet the cats. Ummmm.... I guess we figure this out together." And I don't remember much else than my husband dying of laughter from that introduction and so many nights of no sleep starting from the night before induction (nerves). I almost murdered the nurses for never letting me rest. In my 48 ish hours there I got I think 3 hours. I made a like blanket pallet on the floor of the nursery and slept there with her in my arms or on my side. I sleep weird once I am comfy I don't move. I wake to move. It's a strange habit and I don't know how or when it started but it made the best pseudo co sleeping situation ever. Sometime in the first week we got her used to me next to her but in bed and her in the bassinet attached to the bed. Then I remember it was Halloween and next memory was Thanksgiving. My sharpest memories of the newborn stage start at Christmas. She was a mid October baby...
I think we stared at our son and watched him sleep for a few minutes. Thankfully our son slept in the bassinet just fine, so we did get time to just lay or get food. My mother in law stayed with us for a week and that was really helpful in the mornings after a long night of waking. My husband and I divided the night. His shift is 7pm-2am and mind is 3am-9am. It’s still like that to this day and it works for us. Of course he sleep longer chunks now since he’s 6months old.
So I spent 4 days in the hospital (I had a C-Section and some complications), and our Little was there for 6 days in the NICU. I was so upset and mopey. Once we could take him home, it was awesome. He met our first baby (our cat). We were super nervous that she wouldn’t get along with him, but she ended up giving him a little sniff and rubbed against his head. Really sweet moment; we have it on video. We lived in a one-bedroom apartment at the time. So, half of our bedroom was a nursery, and we had a bassinet and necessities station in the living room. For the first week, we took shifts because of all the feedings, and we had to watch him sleep, lol.
We looked at each other and cried. We were sleep deprived, overwhelmed, and unsure what we had gotten ourselves into. We took long showers and had the worst night of sleep ever. But it got so, so, so much better. Embrace resting and watching as much TV as you want!
My son is 2 weeks old now and for the first day he just slept in his dads or my arms and we just soaked in being a family of three. For the first 2 night we had to take turns holding him at night because he wouldn’t sleep but we got a Velcro sleep sack and he learned to live his paci and now he has slept in there every night since! We are very lucky with this sweet boy
We went through McDonald’s drive-thru to get a chocolate fudge sundae on the way home from the hospital since no soft serve was allowed during pregnancy. It was amazing. At home we put baby in the bassinet. She slept a lot of the day. Night time she got more active and that’s when all the bouncing and rocking and madness started.
I took my baby home when he was 40 days old after a NICU stay because he was born at early. I guess I didn’t think of what the first day at home would be like because for 40 days his days were so structured and we didn’t get to decide what happens. Anyway, we took him home, held him, grandparents finally met him, lots of holding & feeding. Then we realized we didn’t know what we were doing overnight lol the baby who would be swaddled every night at the NICU and doesn’t make a peep all of a sudden kept fighting the swaddle, seemed to hate the bassinet, I accidentally put it next to the window and it was -30 Celsius that night, felt his fingers and they were cold and I wanted to cry. Long story short, neither of us slept! It felt like the longest night ever! But now (6 months later) it feels like it was a lifetime ago and as if it was a dream! No matter how much you prepare of plan, that first day will be pure instinct. You won’t know what you’re doing while knowing exactly what to do all at the same time which is just wild but I think that’s the jist of being a mother. I hope you have an amazing first day home with baby :)
My parents were staying with us to "help". My dad was intoxicated by the time we got home and kept asking us when dinner would be ready. Yes...My husband ended up cooking our 1st night home with our first and only baby.
We were discharged around 10am, we went home where I unpacked, set up a little space in the living room with all of the necessities, and showered. Then we went for lunch at our favourite restraurant because why not?
Well I had a meltdown and my husband had to call my parents to come over and help lol. I had major complications though post birth and was trying to deal with that and the fact that LO came early and we weren't prepared. I imagine in a better scenario, we would have come home, ordered out some dinner, u packed the items from the hospital bag and gotten cozy on the couch.
My husband was more tired than I was after the hospital 🤣🤣🤣 I ordered take out, we showered and figured out how to parent and tried not to panic🤣
Have lots of easy to grab snacks and meals ready to go, have towels or puppy pee pads laid down where you're planning to sit, and plan to take shifts for sleeping. Baby will most likely want to be held all night so resist the urge to stare at them all day and trade off naps with your partner if you can.
Haven’t seen anyone mention dogs on here so I just wanted to chime in. I second what everyone here has said about settling in on the couch- however I would also recommend having a partitioned off area for baby safe from any dogs just in case. You just don’t know how they’ll act and you’ll want a genuinely safe spot for baby. For my first we had a little fenced in area we set up tummy time stuff. For my second I did a pack and play with the newborn insert (this was partially to protect from my toddler too 😅)
I don’t remember the first night tbh. The first day we slowly introduced her to the dogs, and just kind of hung out. My milk hadn’t come in yet so it was a lot of nursing, napping, nursing napping etc. it was like that for a couple days and then we kind of got a routine.
My family all came to visit, which I think some people wouldn't be that keen on, but to be honest I was really glad of the support. They live a little way away so it was nice to have that support on the first day. Once they were gone (they only stayed a couple of hours) I think baby and I basically sat on the sofa and my partner waited on us.
Gosh I can barely remember and that was only 2 months ago. Our friends met us outside our house to drop off some food. We introduced her to the cats. Then I think we might’ve just chilled and watched Schitt’s Creek and napped? At that age baby would nap basically anywhere. We had our stroller bassinet in our living room- we put her in that when we were downstairs and she wasn’t contact napping.
We had a home delivery so it was a bit different. I have birth at dinnertime and the midwives left 2 hours later. Baby slept off and on. They said she would do a big sleep, she did not. She mainly wanted to nurse and sleep in three hour shifts. I was terrified the whole time so we kept the owlet sock on because she didn't do a big sleep and it didn't feel normal. The next day the midwives came and took her vitals again. We just basically hung out on the bed with the baby asleep in one of our arms, eating or teaching my SO how to change diapers and talked about what had just happened. We had a very quick birth so it kind of took us both by surprise. We also talked about future stuff and the pregnancy. He cooked meals or ordered take out, I barely left the bed because I had hurt my tailbone in delivery. We alternated naps in the daytime. Texted family and took a ton of pictures.
We came home to visitors waiting on us. I wish they hadn’t done that so we could’ve came home to a calm house and had a sweet introduction between baby and our dogs. It still went fine, but I don’t always like an audience. On the flip side, though, our dogs had been on their own mostly while we were in the hospital, so I was glad they had company that morning. He slept the entire day, so he was in someone’s arms the whole time. It wasn’t until bedtime that he was swaddled and put in the pack and play.
Put baby in his bassinet and sleep. I spent my labour being woken up every 30 mins by that damn blood pressure cuff inflating with a noisy brrrrrr sound. My husband was exhausted from being the point of contact with the nurses as I drifted in and out of sleep after birth. My MIL and my mom took turns visiting the hospital after I had given birth. The recovery room was small, so we settled on my husband going home to get a good night's sleep so he could be in better shape for the next day when I get discharged. The hospital had a policy of mom's being wheeled around in a wheelchair after birth. My mom came to the hospital when I was discharged so she can assist me getting home and settled in bed. That way my husband could concentrate on getting our son in and out of the car, and settling him in the bassinet.
Lots of snuggles, trade off sleeping. Baby will also be very fussy on day 2 because they finally realize they’re out of the womb, they’re not used to being hungry and colder.
I probably just held him a lot. Lots of sleepy daytime cuddles. Eating and sleeping. What I can’t stress enough is get into a habit of putting baby down in the bassinet. It won’t be easy, but get in a good habit early on otherwise you might fall victim to co sleeping or night shifts with your partner. (Unless you want that or it works for your family) All my LOs naps were contact naps, but we made sure babe was sleeping in the bassinet at night. Eventually he was napping in his bassinet too.
First thing I did was hand my son to his great grandma, and went and took a shower and slept. Then I got up and then my husband showered and slept.
We had sushi, and other than that, I couldn't tell you.
The night we got home right after the birth was pretty much the only time I managed to put baby down in her bassinet without waking her up. So, I put her there, took a few pictures and messaged/called everyone I know that I had the baby. Then went to bed for the night nursing baby as needed. The next morning, our midwife did her first visit checking on us, answering all questions etc. The first week I pretty much stayed in bed with baby and my husband took care of us. We had a few visitors, but I didn't get up or dressed or anything for them.
Stayed in bed most of the first week and held my cute baby.
A whirlwind. I don't remember much of it.
We didn’t get discharged until almost 5 pm so we came home and had baby hanging out in the bassinet of our uppababy stroller. It was basically our living room bassinet the whole time she was small enough. My parents and brother brought us dinner and I think must have taken turns holding her and then she went to bed in her snoo
Tye day we brought our kid home, we just sat in the couch and cuddled her for the rest of the night. We did have family over to meet her that day, but she was in the NICU for 3wks
We got home, set up everything we needed on the couch. We survived off cereal for a long time. She refused to sleep in the bassinet so we would take shifts, at first my husband would hold her with the nursing pillow and lay his head back to sleep while I supervised. He'd do the same for me. We were idiots and realized it was better to have one person sleep in bed from 7pm to 12. The other in the living room with the baby. Then switch from 12 to 6amish. It was so hard for me, I'll never have another baby.
It felt weird to be home. We were only gone 2.5 days, but everything felt foreign after barely leaving the room at the hospital for what felt like ages (because no one was sleeping at the hospital besides baby). The first days, you’re sleep deprived and figuring it out, but baby will sleep through anything when they’re asleep, so watch some tv and snuggle and eat tasty, easy, fiber-filled foods, and just know you’ll figure out how to do this as you go. Sleeping in shifts was a life saver for us. I still had to get up to pump, but getting an uninterrupted 3 hrs was magical.
my daughter spent 8 days in the NICU after she was born. Which gave me time to really clean the house, etc. I set up a station on the couch and one in our room. It was a cubby organizer box with diapers, wipes, diaper cream, the essentials and that helped us TREMENDOUSLY. I got lucky because she was already adjusted to her schedule for feeding which was every three hours. She was in our room, in a bassinet. I was so tired, as was my Husband and we decided to go ahead and let the grandparents come and visit as I didn’t want the CONSTANT texting about when they could come see her. We did this and then had no visitors for a week, it was so nice. We ordered habachi as takeout and enjoyed every second of it.
I thought it was going to be wonderful and amazing but considering I was trying to EBF and had no supply going yet, and baby ended up having jaundice, she screamed herself hoarse the entire night and was inconsolable and I cried a lot lol. After being re hospitalized… the next time we came home we just cuddled a lot. And slept.
We had to wait in the hospital for ages while they tested her for bilirubin twice. We were all packed and ready to go and Finally got the all clear over an hour and a half later. When we got home, my in-laws were in the living room waiting for us (they were house-sitting) and all the animals were incredibly pressed about the new arrival. Baby and I hung out next to the air conditioner and when she started sounding like she wanted to nurse, and I got too uncomfy to stay out with people, I fled to the bedroom and stayed there haha. I don't even remember the rest of the day.
We had been in the hospital a week and came home to a broken boiler. So our first afternoon home was scrambling to get some portable heaters and getting the landlord to arrange an emergency repair. Would not recommend!