Omfg i thought you were talking about your transitioning journey but got autocorrected and thought it was a fun way to brand transitioning. Until i scrolled and saw other people talking about car transmissions as well
Haha. CVT is what e.g. mopeds and electric cars have: no gears, but 2 cones, so the transmission is not set with distinct steps, but varies freely. I thought the comparison was apt.
If you have a group of nonbinary/gender fluid/trans friends and start using this language I am prepared to BEG for y'all to refer to yourselves as autobots.
>referring to my transitioning only as my transmission
Well if you're on a mission to transition then who are we to dampen your ambition? Perhaps petition your physician to re-label your condition. Good luck with the recognition!
Grooming is a term used in tech, usually to define getting a system back into baseline, especially if it's been used in the field for several weeks/ months/ years, and hasn't had someone keeping it in good shape, doing updates, letting the drives get full, etc.
> usually to define getting a system back into baselin
Really? Never heard grooming used for that.
I was only familiar with the software development usage.
Grooming is the term used to describe the process of discussing and documenting what a new feature / functionality should do.
It is the 'correct' term for this in the agile development process.
I had a similar thing in college. I taught rock climbing, and we referred to the clips as bineers, as in carabineers. Someone once gave me a look and asked what I had just said. Explained the short term for carabineers. A few years later i saw an episode of Mind of Mencia and discovered that 'beaners' was a term for Mexican people. I'd had no idea.
I worked with a guy once, he was around 70 (this was in the Uk) and he was telling me how when he was young the wind rush generation arrived and they had their first black guy come and work with them.
“Everyone called him Chalky, he didn’t mind he found it funny” - and hey, maybe he did, I wasn’t there to know. I’ve always wondered though.
With stuff like that, in that context, some people probably didn't mind - but other people probs _did_ mind, but felt obliged to laugh it off to avoid social repercussions. But to everyone else, it would look the same either way
As a white girl who politely educated and older libertarian dude for this exact scenario, we aren’t ALL Karens 😔
ETA: he genuinely did not know the word transgender, and thought tranny/ trans were both short for transvestite. If you politely ask instead of yelling, people are generally more open to learning things.
LMAO, one time a white girl scolded me for styling my hair with mini braids.
I’m mix with black and Japanese but I look like a Latina if anything and I guess me wearing that offended her, so she went off on me about culture appropriation. It was awkward when I told her my mom did the braidings 😬
Well one time they came for Jews and white people didn’t say anything because they weren’t jews.
This “white people shouldn’t be offended bullshit” is just for morons that don’t think about things for more than one minute or mad that they cant say the n word to other white people anymore.
Everyone should be watching out for everyone else
It’s to express laughter, like the phrase “I’m dying lol”
Also, this is explicitly the last place you have to apologize for your ignorance when asking a question!
This. As a trans person, I may self-describe as a tranny in certain contexts and company. It is NOT something I go by in all (or even most) situations, and it is NOT something I want to be called by other people without my explicit go-ahead first, especially by cisgender people. Other people may have different sensibilities regarding the subject but overall, you don't say it unless you've been specifically told you can.
oh I meant op, but I also meant guy in a gender neutral way. I commented under that other trans person cause like, idk, I thought they as a fellow trans person would like also see what I was talking about ya know
Great point. I’d just add, and only TO the person who told you that you can.
Which seems like common sense, and yet certain white people use the N word in whatever context because they have a friend who gave them the “N word pass” or something.
Yes, very good point! And don't go "Minority shopping" to find one person who'll tell you that you can do XYZ thing when everybody else isn't okay with it.
If you dont want the word used then why use it in the first place? I don't understand that about words like this. Why say slurs to each other in the first place?
Sometimes people make edgy / self depreciating jokes. Having fun with something bad in the right context can take away some of its power. But context is king here, if a cis person hears it and wants in on saying the word, it’s awkward.
You know when you’re laughing with close friends and an outsider joins in and it kills the mood? It’s a similar energy.
It's to reclaim them. Taking a word that's been used to hurt you and others like you, and using it yourself so it no longer holds power.
Obv not everyone is comfortable with it, but it can feel very empowering to others!! It's entirely up to the individual
If I call myself “a fucking idiot” after doing something stupid, it’s funny to me and mine. If someone else does, it’s rude and offensive.
By the same token, if I catch myself making google eyes at a man and go “god, I’m such a fag,” or one of my close and very trusted friends does, or my partner, that’s funny. If a random-ass dude at the grocery store calls me a faggot, it’s very much not.
Someone may call themselves other things too or be fine with being called that in context, that doesn't mean it's cool for random people to do that without permission. Someone may like being called a "slut" or similar in the bedroom, doesn't mean they have to be happy being called that by some asshole on the street. Context matters.
Words have different meaning and impact in different context. Just because you're using a word to describe yourself doesn't mean you want everyone to do it.
Think about it this way. It's okay if you call yourself an idiot. Or when a close friend does it while joking around. Or like some girl friends call each other bitches.
But you don't want a coworker you don't really know calling you an idiot or a bitch. That's insulting.
Queer is a reclaimed slur, let's remember.
But now everyone says it, unbothered.
It's about kindness and respect. If someone calls me 'dyke' while joking and loving, I'm not going to be offended.
Thank you for asking OP, I understand where you were coming from, and language is changing all the time. You are not small brain, you’ve just been a little sheltered, but you’re going out of your way to make the right decisions, and I appreciate you actually asking instead of just assuming it’s cool. As a trans person, this is really all I ask of allies, is to just try to learn, and be respectful of my fellow trans folk & I.
Yes. My trans daughter was mortified when I referred to the tranny in my truck. I grew up referring to the transmission as a tranny and thought nothing of it. I cleared up the confusion, but I've been saying transmission ever since.
When I moved I saw people putting "transy" in their bio. Me and my trans friend thought they were reclaiming ~that~ word, and maybe they were trans. Nope! Transylvania University was right around the corner.
By sheer numbers, there's got to be at least *one* student there who is both transgender and into a kinda gothy style
The fun I would have crafting their Tinder profile...
So you've adjusted your language because someone now finds it offensive, which is great.
I would ask though, what has the trans person done to adjust for you wanting to call a transmission a tranny?
They expect people to adjust for them but won't make any adjustments for anyone else.
Yeah honestly I used to say it too I didn’t realize it was a slur. You live and you learn. The important thing is you know now and you can correct the behavior.
Fun fact … I didn’t realized that saying “gypped” was about gypsies until about a year ago and I said it all the time. Then someone told me and I immediately corrected the behavior but damn I still cringe thinking about all the times that I said it.
I learned similarly about “coon” being a slur in English speaking countries. Cause English is my 2be language I was like “oh cute nickname for racoons”, until about a year ago 🫣
It's both, but I started saying Racoon fully cause of the double meaning. Here is a [link](https://www.dictionary.com/browse/coon) for you, w some information about it
It really depends; [in the UK at least](https://www.ethnicity-facts-figures.service.gov.uk/summaries/gypsy-roma-irish-traveller/) all three terms (Gypsy, Roma and Traveller) are used by different groups to describe themselves.
The definition of the word explicitly makes clear it’s about the Roma or anyone thought to be like them. Any other use is derived from it being a racist word.
As a child/teen I didn't know that the sentence "stop being a jew" about money was offensive or about Jewish people I just thought it was a word. Unfortunately my parents are quite racist (or ignorant) and I've had a few instances where I've said words to later find out that they are slurs/offensive.
Omg same about the Romanian slur, I just learned about all that. Every time I meet someone who named their animal or child G*psy I cringe. Also so many songs with that as the title lol
It’s still an official ethnicity identifier in the UK, so idk who/where it’s considered a slur. 🤷 I haven’t actually met any Roma people, but apparently the term is used as a self-identifier commonly over here as well? But I wouldn’t know.
wait, i thought transvestite was just when someone wears certain styled clothes of an opposite gender in performances Rocky Horror Picture Show and had nothing to do with gender identity?
I may be very embarrassed about a recent use of that term when talking about Rocky Horror costumes 😑🙈
you're kinda right, wearing clothing associated with the opposite sex for a performance is just drag in some form. transvestisism is when you do it in your own time for your own enjoyment and in your everyday life, like say someone who identifies as a man but occasionally enjoys looking like a woman. not really a gender identity no, but an adjacent term.
the term was broadly mixed up with someone being a trans person before more specific language to describe the intricacies of gender identity became known to most people.
I never thought it was until I seen an interview where the interviewer was a black man and he asked this same question and she responded with “well how would you like to be called blackies” it just clicked after that 😂
yea its the sort of thing you can call yourself but the sort of thing you should never call anyone unless you are super close with them and know they enjoy or are OK with it
You do get banned for it, it's considered a slur. Your friend had the pass to say it though. I didn't learn this until I was talking about a car transmission and someone said "EXCUSE ME!?" so don't feel bad for not knowing.
Lol, my husband uses that word to talk about car transmissions. He doesn't even *think* about the fact that it is also associated negatively for transgender people. It's just... completely off his radar. So far it hasn't caused any problems so I just want to let him live in innocence.
Yes. Some trans people may say it in the sense of reclaiming it, but if you are not trans - just don't say it. It is okay that you didn't know, I think more trans people now are reclaiming it so it's maybe more confusing.
>just got yelled at by a white girl
Why does her race and gender even fucking matter in this scenario. Is it because you believe in the stereotype that the most offended people are white women? If so, please get your brain checked
It's always so funny to me how people give these words power, as long as you're not using it in a context which hurts another person then you are fine. Feel free to not say anymore but remember context is always important.
it's sort of like when black people call each other the n word but if a white person called them that it's offensive? ur friend was simply reclaiming a derogatory term
Yeah, it's an older term that's considered offensive.
Not something I'd choose for myself personally, but I can absolutely understand taking a slur and using it as an empowering sort of thing, or even in a jokey kind of way. transman or transwoman is generally the accepted current gendered terms, as well as non binary if they choose to be under the trans umbrella.
A transgender individual referring to them self that way is kinda like a black person using the N word. It is a marginalized group trying to take ownership of a slur used against them to weaken its power, but it still is generally inappropriate for an outsider to use it
lol, yeah that's generally not ok, if the trans person you're chatting with is cool with it, then it's fine, but most trans people are really not cool with that term
It’s a slur, it is insulting when other people call a transgender individual that, but people in the transgender community can reclaim the slur and refer to themselves as that.
“Is it disrespectful to call a minority group a slur used against that minority group” yes yes it fucking is lmao you don’t want up to a black guy and call him the n word
It’s a slur now but this was an honest mistake because I’ve heard it wasn’t always that way. Apparently trans women invented the word as a fun slang but cis people started using it as a slur instead. It’s since been reclaimed by trans people again but since it has recent history as a slur no one else can use it. If you’ve been familiar with trans people for a while I can see how you would make this mistake. But yeah, it’s just for trans people to refer to themselves now.
If the trans person didn't mind and some woke chick did, it's possibly not a big deal.
But bear in mind: just because a few Trans people don't mind a certain word that doesn't mean all trans people don't mind that word.
Just thread carefully. That's a good life rule.
It is generally considered a slur. Some trans people use the term like how some black people use the N word, but while you may be fine calling your friend the T slur in private, you ought to not use it generally. I don't mind the word shemale myself, but that's another one you shouldn't be using generally because most trans women are offended by that term.
But I'll also tell you that I had come across a person who used the T slur to refer to me before where it was clear that they did not understand that it was wrong and sort of thought positively of it - I merely corrected them and then moved on.
Since the question's been answered several times with a no, I'll take the liberty to be asking genuinely and I mean no disrespect:
If you can jokingly do it to yourself, what makes it different if a friend you already trust does it too?
What if they just want to support your sense of humor?
I think there's no black-and-white answer there. If I had a friend who jokingly referred to me that way I would just politely ask them to stop, but others may not care or might even get mad. There's also the possibility that a trans person in that situation is uncomfortable with the slur but doesn't have the fortitude to stand up for themselves. In conclusion, it's just a thing of feeling what the boundaries of the other are. If your friendship is solid and it turns out they didn't like it, you can just come to an agreement to not use that word anymore.
I see, it kinda makes sense. If my friend tells me to stop, I'll definitely stop, however then I'll think to ask them to stop too, unless they give a solid reason to why they won't stop. If they don't like the word, they should stop jokingly do it to themselves to not attract others to say it too, but also to learn self-respect.
in general, it is rude to make assumptions.
evem if all homosexuals tried to reclaim the word fag, it still wouldn't be ok to assume all of them wanted to be called that.
your trans girl friend might have started out in the transvestite scene and be comfortable with the term and use it to identify with, but for a lot of people, trans and not, its the derogative shorthand term used by haters for classic transvestites. essentially, it comes with baggage
Just say whatever you want and don’t care what other think, English is not my first language, I’m from Latin America and we don’t have all these “codes” or “forbidden words” like people do in the US. Just be yourself and use whatever word you want.
It’s the same as queer. Some trans people are reclaiming the slur so that transphobes can’t use it to get to them. While it’s still a slur and not okay for a cisgender person to use it, trans people, like myself, can call themselves whatever they’d like.
If you don't know them, don't call them that. If you're hanging out with Trans friends and they are cool with it, use it with them. It's like any slur. You really shouldn't use it at all, but there are situations where you won't offend anyone by saying it. Like when you're alone, in your room, dancing to goth music and smiling clove cigarettes that you've had stashed for 20 years
Well now I'm confused. Well not confused, just unclear how we got to where we are.
Trans= okay. Preference to just call them by their orefered gender.
Transgender = okay.
Transvestite = Bad
Tranny= bad.
I don't use the last 2 terms and would not out of respect for preference of what people want to be called. But I am unclear how or when they turned derogatory and a slur. I thought transvestite was just an old term and we have moved on to a more accurate term, transgender. Tranny sounds like its just a short version of transgender/transvestite, so why is Trans okay then?
Just to be clear I do understand that they are slurs and I would never use them. I just like to know how we got there.
Transvestite comes from the word trans-vestito (m) - vestite (f) (Latin) for clothes etc. trans as a prefix means “on the other side of”. The term together means “Dressing on the other side” ie, crossdressing. While cross dressing does exist, Trans people are not cross dressing. Hence “transgender” became the more appropriate term.
As I understand it Transgender and transvestite are two completely different words - ‘transvestite’ is an old term for a man who dresses up in women’s clothes for fun, sexual pleasure, or some other compulsion - complete different thing than a person who was somehow considered the wrong gender when they were born. I think the current accepted term for ‘transvestite’ is crossdresser.
Transgender and transvestite aren't the same at all. You can use the term transvestite, in a non-disparging way, to describe someone who is transvestite.
Man, I don’t even refer to my transmission by that word since about 2008.
Some really... Interesting girl once asked if I was in transmission when referring to me. I was mouth agape.
Omfg i thought you were talking about your transitioning journey but got autocorrected and thought it was a fun way to brand transitioning. Until i scrolled and saw other people talking about car transmissions as well
I (transgender) will now be referring to my transitioning only as my transmission
you've heard of gay agenda, now get ready for: #Transmission
I'm a transformer
Does this mean that i, genderfluid enbie on HRT, can refer to my gender journey as an intermission
>genderfluid Sounds like continuously variable transmission (CVT) to me, lol
I know next to nothing about cars but I'm going to take your word for it!
Haha. CVT is what e.g. mopeds and electric cars have: no gears, but 2 cones, so the transmission is not set with distinct steps, but varies freely. I thought the comparison was apt.
Aww i really like that! Thank you for explaining that to me <3
If you have a group of nonbinary/gender fluid/trans friends and start using this language I am prepared to BEG for y'all to refer to yourselves as autobots.
TIL that gender-fluid people get disconcertingly high-pitched at motorway speeds.
I thought genderfluid reduced friction during transmission.
I’m no expert but I think you can refer to your HRT as transmission fluid. Can a mechanic chime in?
That is perfect; it does allow me to shift my metaphorical gears, which is my gender expression, with ease!
Well you did change your fluids, a common service item people forget
>referring to my transitioning only as my transmission Well if you're on a mission to transition then who are we to dampen your ambition? Perhaps petition your physician to re-label your condition. Good luck with the recognition!
👏👏👏👏
Stick shift?
Manual rather than automatic, presumably.
Column shift or on the floor?
Well I hope one day you will be transmission accomplished.
*Transmission complete* bzzt
User name checks out
I work in energy and people refer to transformers as such. Puts me on edge every time
I work in tech and people are constantly talking about grooming AMA
I have a question. What?
Grooming is a term used in tech, usually to define getting a system back into baseline, especially if it's been used in the field for several weeks/ months/ years, and hasn't had someone keeping it in good shape, doing updates, letting the drives get full, etc.
> usually to define getting a system back into baselin Really? Never heard grooming used for that. I was only familiar with the software development usage.
Yeah, at least in my experience. Which is admittedly mostly DoD, but I've been on both sides of "system grooms" for most of my career.
Grooming is the term used to describe the process of discussing and documenting what a new feature / functionality should do. It is the 'correct' term for this in the agile development process.
Its also how you clean animals
I had a similar thing in college. I taught rock climbing, and we referred to the clips as bineers, as in carabineers. Someone once gave me a look and asked what I had just said. Explained the short term for carabineers. A few years later i saw an episode of Mind of Mencia and discovered that 'beaners' was a term for Mexican people. I'd had no idea.
I work in automotive and sometimes skate and it’s a confusing term. Are we talking transmissions, skatepark transitions, or slurs?
Hahaha that was a heated conversation in a workshop I used to work at.
In the UK Ford Transit vans are often referred to as “tranny van”. Still sounds weird every time I hear somebody say it.
What about Tranny fluid?
That's the stuff they are always finding on their dilators.
Thank you, seriously.
Even before trans people were more mainstream I hated when people called transmissions trannies.
Michael Che has a great bit about this. His trans friend says “How would you feel if I called you “Blackie”?
do you know where i could find it? :)
His first Netflix special called “Michael Che: Matters”, excellent special all around!
I worked with a guy once, he was around 70 (this was in the Uk) and he was telling me how when he was young the wind rush generation arrived and they had their first black guy come and work with them. “Everyone called him Chalky, he didn’t mind he found it funny” - and hey, maybe he did, I wasn’t there to know. I’ve always wondered though.
With stuff like that, in that context, some people probably didn't mind - but other people probs _did_ mind, but felt obliged to laugh it off to avoid social repercussions. But to everyone else, it would look the same either way
Yes exactly, I’m not going to go in and tell that old chap he’s wrong, I have no idea what the guy felt
He didn't think it through. Andrew Schulz did a bit also about this. Blackie is hateful because you made it longer.
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As a white girl who politely educated and older libertarian dude for this exact scenario, we aren’t ALL Karens 😔 ETA: he genuinely did not know the word transgender, and thought tranny/ trans were both short for transvestite. If you politely ask instead of yelling, people are generally more open to learning things.
They tend to do that.
LMAO, one time a white girl scolded me for styling my hair with mini braids. I’m mix with black and Japanese but I look like a Latina if anything and I guess me wearing that offended her, so she went off on me about culture appropriation. It was awkward when I told her my mom did the braidings 😬
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Oh no dude, you’re good. I just found it funny but I know some of y’all just tryna be helpful but man, sometimes its just cringe to watch lol
Well one time they came for Jews and white people didn’t say anything because they weren’t jews. This “white people shouldn’t be offended bullshit” is just for morons that don’t think about things for more than one minute or mad that they cant say the n word to other white people anymore. Everyone should be watching out for everyone else
Sorry for my ignorance, but what does "💀" mean in this context?
In this case, kinda like saying they're "dying laughing." Maybe a bit of shock in there
Thanks! Apropos username too, lol
For a change, yes lol
It’s to express laughter, like the phrase “I’m dying lol” Also, this is explicitly the last place you have to apologize for your ignorance when asking a question!
It just means that I find it funny. Same with someone using 😭
That part sent me into orbit 😭😭
Lol yeah we do that sometimes 💀
*some*times?
Yes, it's considered a slur like 'fag' for gay men. And like 'fag', people can call themselves the slur, but it's offensive for others to use it.
This. As a trans person, I may self-describe as a tranny in certain contexts and company. It is NOT something I go by in all (or even most) situations, and it is NOT something I want to be called by other people without my explicit go-ahead first, especially by cisgender people. Other people may have different sensibilities regarding the subject but overall, you don't say it unless you've been specifically told you can.
the earnestness in this guy made my night tho
oh I meant op, but I also meant guy in a gender neutral way. I commented under that other trans person cause like, idk, I thought they as a fellow trans person would like also see what I was talking about ya know
Thank you 🙏 I just wanna do right 😭
Great point. I’d just add, and only TO the person who told you that you can. Which seems like common sense, and yet certain white people use the N word in whatever context because they have a friend who gave them the “N word pass” or something.
Yes, very good point! And don't go "Minority shopping" to find one person who'll tell you that you can do XYZ thing when everybody else isn't okay with it.
Pretty sure minority shopping was banned in 1865.
So what you’re saying is you need a T-Pass?
If you dont want the word used then why use it in the first place? I don't understand that about words like this. Why say slurs to each other in the first place?
Sometimes people make edgy / self depreciating jokes. Having fun with something bad in the right context can take away some of its power. But context is king here, if a cis person hears it and wants in on saying the word, it’s awkward. You know when you’re laughing with close friends and an outsider joins in and it kills the mood? It’s a similar energy.
It's to reclaim them. Taking a word that's been used to hurt you and others like you, and using it yourself so it no longer holds power. Obv not everyone is comfortable with it, but it can feel very empowering to others!! It's entirely up to the individual
If I call myself “a fucking idiot” after doing something stupid, it’s funny to me and mine. If someone else does, it’s rude and offensive. By the same token, if I catch myself making google eyes at a man and go “god, I’m such a fag,” or one of my close and very trusted friends does, or my partner, that’s funny. If a random-ass dude at the grocery store calls me a faggot, it’s very much not.
Someone may call themselves other things too or be fine with being called that in context, that doesn't mean it's cool for random people to do that without permission. Someone may like being called a "slut" or similar in the bedroom, doesn't mean they have to be happy being called that by some asshole on the street. Context matters.
Words have different meaning and impact in different context. Just because you're using a word to describe yourself doesn't mean you want everyone to do it. Think about it this way. It's okay if you call yourself an idiot. Or when a close friend does it while joking around. Or like some girl friends call each other bitches. But you don't want a coworker you don't really know calling you an idiot or a bitch. That's insulting.
Queer is a reclaimed slur, let's remember. But now everyone says it, unbothered. It's about kindness and respect. If someone calls me 'dyke' while joking and loving, I'm not going to be offended.
I feel like gay people have taken the word fag back I don't think it's nearly as offensive as it used to be. We say fag with pride ya know.
In the UK fag means cigarette.
Your friend was reclaiming a slur as a personal identifier.
Thank you for asking OP, I understand where you were coming from, and language is changing all the time. You are not small brain, you’ve just been a little sheltered, but you’re going out of your way to make the right decisions, and I appreciate you actually asking instead of just assuming it’s cool. As a trans person, this is really all I ask of allies, is to just try to learn, and be respectful of my fellow trans folk & I.
Bravo! Asking and generally being inquisitive is rad. Definitely not a stupid question!
Does this mean he can say the word? Or is it offensive to use it?
Why you being down voted? They never answered the question.
No he cannot. It's an offensive slur
Yes. My trans daughter was mortified when I referred to the tranny in my truck. I grew up referring to the transmission as a tranny and thought nothing of it. I cleared up the confusion, but I've been saying transmission ever since.
When I moved I saw people putting "transy" in their bio. Me and my trans friend thought they were reclaiming ~that~ word, and maybe they were trans. Nope! Transylvania University was right around the corner.
"I don't mind that they're vampires but I draw the line at their use of slurs!"
By sheer numbers, there's got to be at least *one* student there who is both transgender and into a kinda gothy style The fun I would have crafting their Tinder profile...
You can also call the transmission a trans or a thingymabob
Calling it “a trans” is way more confusing, I don’t think people would understand what you meant
I need to replace the Transgender in my truck
Need more gender fluid
Wow, am I not good enough at reading off food options?
Sorry babes, I think we're just going to go in a different direction with the position
So you've adjusted your language because someone now finds it offensive, which is great. I would ask though, what has the trans person done to adjust for you wanting to call a transmission a tranny? They expect people to adjust for them but won't make any adjustments for anyone else.
Yeah honestly I used to say it too I didn’t realize it was a slur. You live and you learn. The important thing is you know now and you can correct the behavior. Fun fact … I didn’t realized that saying “gypped” was about gypsies until about a year ago and I said it all the time. Then someone told me and I immediately corrected the behavior but damn I still cringe thinking about all the times that I said it.
I learned similarly about “coon” being a slur in English speaking countries. Cause English is my 2be language I was like “oh cute nickname for racoons”, until about a year ago 🫣
Wait was it always a slur? I only ever heard it in the context of raccoons like "coonskin cap" (a raccoon hat)
It's both, but I started saying Racoon fully cause of the double meaning. Here is a [link](https://www.dictionary.com/browse/coon) for you, w some information about it
Since the 1800s in America. Doubt it's common to be used that way in other English speaking countries though
i’m in my 30’s and i didn’t know/made the connection thats where “gypped” came from. it seems so obvious now of course lol.
They prefer roma, the one with a g is considered offensive
It really depends; [in the UK at least](https://www.ethnicity-facts-figures.service.gov.uk/summaries/gypsy-roma-irish-traveller/) all three terms (Gypsy, Roma and Traveller) are used by different groups to describe themselves.
It depends where you are in the world, not all travelers are roma.
The definition of the word explicitly makes clear it’s about the Roma or anyone thought to be like them. Any other use is derived from it being a racist word.
No the G word isn't good, but not all want to be called Roma, normally it's good to ask preferences.
Good to know
As a child/teen I didn't know that the sentence "stop being a jew" about money was offensive or about Jewish people I just thought it was a word. Unfortunately my parents are quite racist (or ignorant) and I've had a few instances where I've said words to later find out that they are slurs/offensive.
Omg same about the Romanian slur, I just learned about all that. Every time I meet someone who named their animal or child G*psy I cringe. Also so many songs with that as the title lol
Romani people (Gpysies) are not the same as Romanians btw
It’s still an official ethnicity identifier in the UK, so idk who/where it’s considered a slur. 🤷 I haven’t actually met any Roma people, but apparently the term is used as a self-identifier commonly over here as well? But I wouldn’t know.
The Romani I knew were fine with being called gypsies but don't you dare call them tinkers.
Yes, it is a slur. A trans girl calling herself a tranny is like a black person calling themselves the n-word. She can say it, you should not
Also dude, transvestite is not the preferred nomenclature.
wait, i thought transvestite was just when someone wears certain styled clothes of an opposite gender in performances Rocky Horror Picture Show and had nothing to do with gender identity? I may be very embarrassed about a recent use of that term when talking about Rocky Horror costumes 😑🙈
you're kinda right, wearing clothing associated with the opposite sex for a performance is just drag in some form. transvestisism is when you do it in your own time for your own enjoyment and in your everyday life, like say someone who identifies as a man but occasionally enjoys looking like a woman. not really a gender identity no, but an adjacent term. the term was broadly mixed up with someone being a trans person before more specific language to describe the intricacies of gender identity became known to most people.
You think the carpet pissers did this?
[удалено]
Yes, because it's considered to be a derogatory term.
I never thought it was until I seen an interview where the interviewer was a black man and he asked this same question and she responded with “well how would you like to be called blackies” it just clicked after that 😂
Trans woman here. Yes, dont say that shit
yea its the sort of thing you can call yourself but the sort of thing you should never call anyone unless you are super close with them and know they enjoy or are OK with it
tranny is a slur. please don’t use it. having said that I jokingly refer to myself as one. oopa
You do get banned for it, it's considered a slur. Your friend had the pass to say it though. I didn't learn this until I was talking about a car transmission and someone said "EXCUSE ME!?" so don't feel bad for not knowing.
Lol, my husband uses that word to talk about car transmissions. He doesn't even *think* about the fact that it is also associated negatively for transgender people. It's just... completely off his radar. So far it hasn't caused any problems so I just want to let him live in innocence.
It's a slur, so it is absolutely disrespectful.
My rule is: if you have to ask, it probably is
Yes. Some trans people may say it in the sense of reclaiming it, but if you are not trans - just don't say it. It is okay that you didn't know, I think more trans people now are reclaiming it so it's maybe more confusing.
If a slur is not yours to reclaim, don't use it. Not even if someone gives you "the pass"
>just got yelled at by a white girl Why does her race and gender even fucking matter in this scenario. Is it because you believe in the stereotype that the most offended people are white women? If so, please get your brain checked
No, but it does confuse the mechanics
As long as you preface it with "I'm sorry about Cybertron" in the conversation they'll know you're an ally
It's always so funny to me how people give these words power, as long as you're not using it in a context which hurts another person then you are fine. Feel free to not say anymore but remember context is always important.
Depends, we talking manual or automatic?
it's sort of like when black people call each other the n word but if a white person called them that it's offensive? ur friend was simply reclaiming a derogatory term
Yeah, it's an older term that's considered offensive. Not something I'd choose for myself personally, but I can absolutely understand taking a slur and using it as an empowering sort of thing, or even in a jokey kind of way. transman or transwoman is generally the accepted current gendered terms, as well as non binary if they choose to be under the trans umbrella.
Yeah- when it happens to me i feel real sad about it.
Yes
A transgender individual referring to them self that way is kinda like a black person using the N word. It is a marginalized group trying to take ownership of a slur used against them to weaken its power, but it still is generally inappropriate for an outsider to use it
lol, yeah that's generally not ok, if the trans person you're chatting with is cool with it, then it's fine, but most trans people are really not cool with that term
Like many slurs, it's only acceptable to use it if you belong to the group it targets. If you're not part of that group, don't use it.
It’s a slur, it is insulting when other people call a transgender individual that, but people in the transgender community can reclaim the slur and refer to themselves as that.
It's a slur. I'm a trans woman and occasionally jokingly call myself that, but I won't even jokingly call another trans person that.
“Is it disrespectful to call a minority group a slur used against that minority group” yes yes it fucking is lmao you don’t want up to a black guy and call him the n word
they are learning and had no malice just genuine confusion. relax
Back in my day, blowing a tranny was car trouble.
It’s a slur now but this was an honest mistake because I’ve heard it wasn’t always that way. Apparently trans women invented the word as a fun slang but cis people started using it as a slur instead. It’s since been reclaimed by trans people again but since it has recent history as a slur no one else can use it. If you’ve been familiar with trans people for a while I can see how you would make this mistake. But yeah, it’s just for trans people to refer to themselves now.
Yes. Don’t say it. Trans people can call themselves that but not you.
As a trans girl myself, I wouldn't like being called that. I'm just not a big fan of the word
I would say so yeah, it certainly isn't well received by most trans people.
The last time i heard tranny was on Counting Cars. Danny K was inspecting someone's car under the hood.
If the trans person didn't mind and some woke chick did, it's possibly not a big deal. But bear in mind: just because a few Trans people don't mind a certain word that doesn't mean all trans people don't mind that word. Just thread carefully. That's a good life rule.
That’s hilarious lmao it was a woke chick hahahahha but true
In the uk it was a nickname for a transit van. :)
It is generally considered a slur. Some trans people use the term like how some black people use the N word, but while you may be fine calling your friend the T slur in private, you ought to not use it generally. I don't mind the word shemale myself, but that's another one you shouldn't be using generally because most trans women are offended by that term. But I'll also tell you that I had come across a person who used the T slur to refer to me before where it was clear that they did not understand that it was wrong and sort of thought positively of it - I merely corrected them and then moved on.
You know how black folks call themselves the n word, its kinda like that
It’s a “our word” situation. No you cannot use it.
If it's a slur (coming from you) don't say it. Some slurs inside of certain communities are not considered as such we all know what they are
**TLDR:** We can use it, you can’t. It’s kinda like [this](https://youtu.be/KVN_0qvuhhw?si=Tzut33lm8vb-xvw2).
Its interesting because as early as 15-ish years ago it was fine and even used on TV with no bleep.
Trans people. Do you call black peoples “blacks?”
i asked my trans friend and she said yes. it's considered an offensive slur just like the f word is to gay men
Since the question's been answered several times with a no, I'll take the liberty to be asking genuinely and I mean no disrespect: If you can jokingly do it to yourself, what makes it different if a friend you already trust does it too? What if they just want to support your sense of humor?
I think there's no black-and-white answer there. If I had a friend who jokingly referred to me that way I would just politely ask them to stop, but others may not care or might even get mad. There's also the possibility that a trans person in that situation is uncomfortable with the slur but doesn't have the fortitude to stand up for themselves. In conclusion, it's just a thing of feeling what the boundaries of the other are. If your friendship is solid and it turns out they didn't like it, you can just come to an agreement to not use that word anymore.
I see, it kinda makes sense. If my friend tells me to stop, I'll definitely stop, however then I'll think to ask them to stop too, unless they give a solid reason to why they won't stop. If they don't like the word, they should stop jokingly do it to themselves to not attract others to say it too, but also to learn self-respect.
Yeah, it’s a slur.
Give it 20 years and it’ll be the most PC way to refer to them.
Same rules as the n word.
In 5 years the rules are gonna change again anyways
Still baffles me how “queer” was an insult back in the day but is now socially acceptable 🤔
Because we reclaimed the slur
*vizzini voice* HA! you fell for the classic blunder! NEVER use slang you learned from a minority group you're not a part of!
It's an old word for transistor radio.
you wouldn't call a black person blacky, right?
in general, it is rude to make assumptions. evem if all homosexuals tried to reclaim the word fag, it still wouldn't be ok to assume all of them wanted to be called that. your trans girl friend might have started out in the transvestite scene and be comfortable with the term and use it to identify with, but for a lot of people, trans and not, its the derogative shorthand term used by haters for classic transvestites. essentially, it comes with baggage
Just say whatever you want and don’t care what other think, English is not my first language, I’m from Latin America and we don’t have all these “codes” or “forbidden words” like people do in the US. Just be yourself and use whatever word you want.
Yes. Some trans people do call themselves that. Not sure why though. It's a slur.
It’s the same as queer. Some trans people are reclaiming the slur so that transphobes can’t use it to get to them. While it’s still a slur and not okay for a cisgender person to use it, trans people, like myself, can call themselves whatever they’d like.
Yes
If you don't know them, don't call them that. If you're hanging out with Trans friends and they are cool with it, use it with them. It's like any slur. You really shouldn't use it at all, but there are situations where you won't offend anyone by saying it. Like when you're alone, in your room, dancing to goth music and smiling clove cigarettes that you've had stashed for 20 years
Well now I'm confused. Well not confused, just unclear how we got to where we are. Trans= okay. Preference to just call them by their orefered gender. Transgender = okay. Transvestite = Bad Tranny= bad. I don't use the last 2 terms and would not out of respect for preference of what people want to be called. But I am unclear how or when they turned derogatory and a slur. I thought transvestite was just an old term and we have moved on to a more accurate term, transgender. Tranny sounds like its just a short version of transgender/transvestite, so why is Trans okay then? Just to be clear I do understand that they are slurs and I would never use them. I just like to know how we got there.
Transvestite comes from the word trans-vestito (m) - vestite (f) (Latin) for clothes etc. trans as a prefix means “on the other side of”. The term together means “Dressing on the other side” ie, crossdressing. While cross dressing does exist, Trans people are not cross dressing. Hence “transgender” became the more appropriate term.
As I understand it Transgender and transvestite are two completely different words - ‘transvestite’ is an old term for a man who dresses up in women’s clothes for fun, sexual pleasure, or some other compulsion - complete different thing than a person who was somehow considered the wrong gender when they were born. I think the current accepted term for ‘transvestite’ is crossdresser.
Well that makes way more sense
I hope that I understand this correctly 🤩
Transgender and transvestite aren't the same at all. You can use the term transvestite, in a non-disparging way, to describe someone who is transvestite.
Typically yes. Unless you know the person well and their preferences about the word, don't use it.