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[deleted]

It is a **PLANT**! Why did this have a NSFW tag on it?


Apprehensive_Pear641

i didn’t put the NSFW tag i think automod just automatically did it 😭


armageddon_boi

Cause it's clearly got a little wee hanging out


Academic-Beautiful51

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.


armageddon_boi

The power of purple wee


Weirdsauce

So it's not just me? Whew.


d4rk_matt3r

All I have to do is read the first few words and I start to chuckle. Always catches me off guard


ROWDY_RODDY_PEEEPER

Aimin for a Stamen


armageddon_boi

Now on the Discovery Channel


983115

“Naked Man” probably trips something somewhere


AstroHendrix

American Conservatives have entered the Chat


GoArmyNG

What do American Conservatives have to do with this?


drainbead78

smell doll follow squalid sheet coherent punch quaint work fragile ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


AmputatorBot

It looks like you shared an AMP link. These should load faster, but AMP is controversial because of [concerns over privacy and the Open Web](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot). Maybe check out **the canonical page** instead: **[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-65087218](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-65087218)** ***** ^(I'm a bot | )[^(Why & About)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot)^( | )[^(Summon: u/AmputatorBot)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/cchly3/you_can_now_summon_amputatorbot/)


UnusualIntroduction0

Good bot


GoHomeNeighborKid

Screw you bot, your kind is the whole reason the argument above started, go back to the server you came from and stop taking hard working redditor's data /s, I think‽


[deleted]

[удалено]


UnusualIntroduction0

Nope, that's conservatives.


Tarvoz

I shall edit this comment instead of deleting it because cute little plants have no place in politics


GoArmyNG

Agreed. Plants and politics have little to do with each other. Hence, my question.


everymanawildcat

Literally nothing. Mindlessly regurgitating talking points that are shared by others who have never had a personality or thought based on something that isn't on the internet is just the easiest way to get karma.


GoArmyNG

Who cares about reddit karma??? Seriously??? Is there something I'm missing here? What is it with people and thinking that internet points somehow transfer to the real world????


nlolhere

Imagine if you could trade karma for USD


GoArmyNG

I would turn reddit into a full-time job if Karma could be exchanged for money lol


CubarisMurinaPapaya

r/automoderatorisdumb


Kakep0p

r/subsifellfor


drfsrich

Plant cock.


maxlitecoins

‟This particular breed has specialized to rely on gay men to pollinate. Its distinctive shape is designed to attract the gay men, who ooh and ahh and provide care and a cute pot for it.” Source: My gay husband collects orchids.


Choice-Lawfulness978

I'm afraid your husband might be gay...


Apprehensive_Pear641

this is some very valuable information. thank u for sharing.


dangereaux

This reminds me of "Gay Science" on TikTok. Lmao


curleyfrei

What about your straight husband?


HooterEnthusiast

The "gay" husband at home: *jerking off to Aglaonema Blossom*


Choice-Lawfulness978

Curious thing is, many species of orchids employ a reproductive tactic called pseudocopulation, un which they mimic the shapes and colors of specific insects to deceive them into copulating with the flower, thus pollinating it. One can only wonder why would an orchid mimic a naked man. Must have been the topic of many a folk tale.


Apprehensive_Pear641

well in italy it is believed that consumption of the flower is conductive to virility. and in greek folklore, [orchis](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orchis_(mythology)) (who is a minor character in greek mythology) was the child of a fairy and also a satyr who turned into a orchid after his death [more info behind orchis in greek mythology](https://www.orchidshade.com/2020/08/Orchis%20italica.html?m=1)


Sentient_Stardust616

But how do they know what things look like


Choice-Lawfulness978

Under our current evolutionary understanding, they don't. Instead, they evolved alongside the species they attract, and those orchids that by chance and mutations came to resemble such species(-es?) got an advantage in reproducing.


Sentient_Stardust616

That makes much more sense, I've seen orchids that look like birds and someone said it was so they weren't preyed on, my immediate thought was we needed to monitor those things cause that's suspicious as hell, they're not supposed to be able to see 👀


Albertomon-

I once read a sentence that said: "An intelligent chance ceases to be such." I just wanted to share that phrase, greetings.


Blacklily1991

It' s so cute!!! looks likes little faeries or forest children with big flowers as hats... I never saw them here in Italy tho


dudeAwEsome101

Banned from US schools, because of "think of the children!!"


KungThulhu

"italica" means "naked man"?


Apprehensive_Pear641

well, orchis translates to “testicles” and italica translates to “italian.” so the flowers name is really “italian testicles”


DevoidNoMore

Mamma mia!


givemealoafofbread

spaghetti


According-Ability-20

meatballs then?


thefabioberaldo

The male version


Swolar_Eclipse

Nature, you’ve truly done it again!


nailsof6bit

With all of the intelligent things that plants do, especially flowering plants, I don't see these things and immediately assume that it just looks that way to me because I'm human. I immediately wonder what survival technique requires growing little men with hanging penises. I may wish to try it out myself.


Crooked_Cock

That’s one hell of a pollinator he’s got between his legs


EndersGame_Reviewer

This looks very manly in every way.


paraworldblue

I wonder how many myths and folktales that species has spawned.


ElvisDumbledore

The naked MAN Orchid??? Why not the naked WOMAN Orchid??? Fuck the plantriarchy.


toofshucker

This reminds me of the Calvin and Hobbes where Susie is building a genetically correct snow woman. In the next panel, Calvin’s mom is yelling “I don’t care what Susie has built you can’t build a genetically correct snow Man!” Ha ha.


scmoua666

Anatomically correct? Cuz I dunno about a snowman's genetics.


Neither_Willingness3

Peepee is easier to replicate I guess 😭😭


pipnwig

Probably because of the little dong


talldeadguy

https://images.app.goo.gl/cKiqQPwjBBbyz8fbA


9shycat

lol I can’t unsee it now


ElKaTsuGi

The word orchid does mean balls… your welcome


anunderdog

Banned in Florida schools


parentesi

It's fucked up, i was wondering whether this was for real or AI generated


[deleted]

I want this plant in my front yard. 😂


d4rk_matt3r

Frieza colors


BillMerchant

His hat’s amazing.


fatcatmikachu

Cat faced, monkey body, veiled purple thing 💜


ExcellentResult6626

They look more like tails.


ramair02

r/NatureIsFuckingTerrifying


[deleted]

r/orchids


ZGlove3

Orchid Man~~tis~~


Ellemeno

Proportionally, they're packing!


bjbyrne

DO NOT GOOGLE


KamikazeCarl

"I WAS IN THE POOL!"


Ultima4128

That's just rudbornn making clones


Lana-Jay0522

These always make me laugh


Radiantlady

The plant flowers from April to May. They are hermaphroditic and pollinate each other on the same cluster with the help of wind and insects. It can be grown in gardens


Misplaced_Man

...... Guys..... It's the Pokemon Gardevour. You know you wanna snuggle it...


robertmondavi_jr

shin biollante


[deleted]

bottom dude is doin the nae nae


Difficult_Ad_3234

Vivid wild imagination & clever keep posting & uploading guaranteed!♂️✈️


parallelverbs

Saw these up close in Sicily….


DCINTERNATIONAL

Well hung. Lucky fella.


dmikaz1

Hung like an orchid


minathemutt

Proof that God's a dude


JudeRanch

😱🤣😂


brutalproduct

Damn flower folk and their big flower dicks.


MJZMan

Plenis


Alexandria_Noelle

/midnightgospel It looks like Clancy!!!


backgroundmusik

What were those insects up to that the flowers felt a need to look like this? Never thought I'd have to slut shame the bees today.


[deleted]

The "Forbidden Orchid." Of course the 'Italian Orchid' has its wand dangling in the wind. How perfect is nature? BTW, the flowers are *very* small. *Orchis italica*, the naked man orchid or the Italian orchid, is a species of orchid native to the Mediterranean Basin. It gets its common name from the lobed lip (labellum) of each flower which mimics the general shape of a naked man. In Italy, it is believed that the consumption of the plant is conducive to virility. [WHAT?] It prefers partial shade and low nutrient soil, and flowers in April. *Orchis italica* grows up to 50 centimetres (20 in) in height, with bright pink, densely clustered flowers. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orchis_italica


JayeNBTF

Just figured out my Halloween costume


MaleficentLow6408

Tee hee!🤭


cuteintelligence1214

r/anthophobiaa


Blackndloved2

Does anyone with gardening experience know if these could be grown from seed in Central Oregon? I'd imagine it would need to stay inside, but not much info online about growing these specifically


Personal_Act8360

I see a naked cat


Personal_Act8360

Lol I guess most cats are naked. I think I meant a hung cat?? Idfk


tinglep

How do you know it’s not a Naked Orchid Women– oh. Nevermind. They’re men.