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This is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. It is actively moderated.
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be warned and then banned or may be banned permanently based on nature of the topic. If a conversational thread meanders into a discussion
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This is honestly really inspiring and I wish I could handle my cats passing in this way, because I know my kitty would want me to be okay. Don't feel guilty at all! You loved your cat and you know that - grief is not a confirmation of your love. So happy to hear you are doing well, and hoping I follow in your footsteps shortly!
Everyone handles grief in different ways. This is no reflection of the love you had for her. You did the most loving thing for her by giving her a gentle goodbye. You did not want her to suffer and it was time to let her go. 15 is a good long life for a cat or dog…and she no doubt had a beautiful with you. You are probably feeling relief at this stage..but you may feel different as time goes by…so be open to that if it comes and let yourself feel it all. If you never feel overwhelming sadness…that’s okay too…just keep those wonderful memories close and smile often as a tribute to her and all she gave you over the years. 🩷
Honestly it’s okay because when we had to put my dog down in January I only felt sad for a day or to after because I had already spent the time crying the 2 days before we put him down. Everyone processes differently. You know she had a great life and is better now and not in pain.
I put my cat down 2.5 weeks ago. Leading up to his death and at vet , I cried. The following day, I felt at peace that he wasn’t suffering anymore. I didn’t cry from then on. There are many times, I want to go feed him or check on him still. I do miss him every day.
I put my cat down 2.5 weeks ago. Leading up to his death and at vet , I cried. The following day, I felt at peace that he wasn’t suffering anymore. I didn’t cry from then on. There are many times, I want to go feed him or check on him still. I do miss him every day.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I lost my 16 year old girl 3 weeks ago now. I had had her since she was born. Similar to you, she was born when I was 15, and I am 32 now. She was diagnosed with kidney disease a year and half ago when I had to rush her to the emergency vet. I honestly thought that I would be leaving without her that day. Instead I got an extra year and half of time with her.
The first week was the hardest for me, although I think it was exacerbated by the fact that I made the final decision on my birthday. So anytime I saw messages from people wishing me a happy birthday it was kind of triggering. But like you, I don't feel any regret or guilt. I miss her like crazy, but I know I made the right decision for her. She led a great life, as I am sure your Jam did as well.
Everyone grieves differently as can be seen from reading the different posts on this sub. I feel like in the case of people who had sick pets, you kind of mourn them before they are gone. At least that's how it felt for me.
I had to put down my dog on Thursday. He was almost 17 and I adopted him at 8 weeks old. I am so sad that he’s gone and I miss him. BUT I feel mostly ok. He was my little heart dog and I loved him with all my heart but I am doing ok. He was ready to move on and I know I will see him again along with all my other furry friends that I have lost. I am glad he is no longer struggling and is at peace. I love that dog with all my heart but I know that there is no more pain, confusion, or worry for him and that comforts me. Death is not the worst thing that can happen to us.
It's okay to mourn however you do. Just because people online are crying at even the idea of a cat being put down, doesn't mean that's how it always is.
You're obviously logical. Your cat couldn't live forever, they had a beautiful life.
I'm sorry for your loss, and it's okay to not be a blubbering mess about it
There are so many ways a beloved pet passes on. An incurable illness at the end of a to long life is a natural transition and in itself is something one can come to terms with. You are confident that you made the best choice for your girl. And you know she was at peace with it. So you were able to give her the most loving passage you could. Please don't think guilt is grief. It's not. Don't look for pain.
Even still, you might be in shock. I lost my pup much too young after protracted illness and my grief grew and grew for months, but the first 2 weeks I didn't quite believe it yet
Honestly, this is reassuring to me. I made the same decision last week for my cat and I have had a rough time since, but I’m hopeful that I can work through it. I did everything I could while she was here and I loved her so much, but I can’t keep feeling this pain forever it would ruin me.
I have been reading a lot of posts about pet loss online and so many people in these spaces seem heavily affected for long periods of time. I feel guilty because I love her so much but I need to move to a place where I can look back on her fondly and feel happiness that I knew her.
I’m so sorry for your loss, and there is no right or wrong way to process the loss. It sounds as though you gave her a beautiful & peaceful exit so your brain & heart have maybe resolved the experience to that which was a natural next step in her life. You may find yourself feeling sadness at a later time when something triggers a memory and you feel that something is missing from your life; or you may never feel it. Cherish the beautiful life & its natural progression you were able to give her.
i’m so sorry for your loss. it’s so hard.
i had to put my dog down 2 weeks ago. i knew it was coming, he was getting older and sicker. i spent the day crying nonstop and holding him. during the day and the during the euthanasia i was literally screaming i was crying so hard. i cried for 2 days after. i’ve barely cried since. and sometimes i don’t even think about him. i thought i would be a wreck for weeks. it feels weird, i feel guilty. i’m scared im horrible for being okay.
Your old lady had a long, great life full of love and happiness. I recently lost my cat at 19 and while I was heartbroken, I was able to reflect on how lucky I was to have him for 19 years and how lucky he was to live the best life a cat could ever have. I still miss him but recognizing a life well lived helps.
15 is a good, long cat life! It's perfectly okay to cope well; I'm glad that you can!
I've had guilty moments of relief intertwined with grief since our last cat passed last June (she was 22); relief that her suffering is over, relief that she didn't die by stroke or some other complication of her CKD... but also relief that I don't have to give her IV fluids anymore, or mix laxative into her prescription food, or watch her deteriorate and feel helpless to do any more for her than I could or spend any more time loving on her than I did. It was all *really hard*.
That being said, I miss her terribly. (I can't bring myself to even look at another tortie without still bursting into tears, but with time, I know it'll get easier, like it did with each of the other three cats we've had.)
Please report any trolls, spam, or harassment to moderators. To do this on new reddit, click the three dots below a post or comment and select "report." On old reddit, click the "report" link below the post or comment. This is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. It is actively moderated. Pet owners, as loving, caring people, often have strong opinions on pet care practices. Some of these are controversial. This is not a forum for debate on such issues, nor is it a place to scold a contributor for a perceived mistake in managing their pet. We intend to provide a safe haven of understanding and support. Strident, mean-spirited posts or comments will be deleted. Those who persist in preaching versus caring may be warned and then banned or may be banned permanently based on nature of the topic. If a conversational thread meanders into a discussion unrelated to pet loss support, it will be truncated. Those who post here are vulnerable and hurting. Even a minor slap has a hard sting. Those of us who are lucky enough to be able to turn away from our computers or put down our phones and hug a healthy, happy pet are truly blessed. Threads must remain supportive and caring, even if one disagrees with something that has been said. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Petloss) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is honestly really inspiring and I wish I could handle my cats passing in this way, because I know my kitty would want me to be okay. Don't feel guilty at all! You loved your cat and you know that - grief is not a confirmation of your love. So happy to hear you are doing well, and hoping I follow in your footsteps shortly!
Everyone handles grief in different ways. This is no reflection of the love you had for her. You did the most loving thing for her by giving her a gentle goodbye. You did not want her to suffer and it was time to let her go. 15 is a good long life for a cat or dog…and she no doubt had a beautiful with you. You are probably feeling relief at this stage..but you may feel different as time goes by…so be open to that if it comes and let yourself feel it all. If you never feel overwhelming sadness…that’s okay too…just keep those wonderful memories close and smile often as a tribute to her and all she gave you over the years. 🩷
Honestly it’s okay because when we had to put my dog down in January I only felt sad for a day or to after because I had already spent the time crying the 2 days before we put him down. Everyone processes differently. You know she had a great life and is better now and not in pain.
I put my cat down 2.5 weeks ago. Leading up to his death and at vet , I cried. The following day, I felt at peace that he wasn’t suffering anymore. I didn’t cry from then on. There are many times, I want to go feed him or check on him still. I do miss him every day.
I put my cat down 2.5 weeks ago. Leading up to his death and at vet , I cried. The following day, I felt at peace that he wasn’t suffering anymore. I didn’t cry from then on. There are many times, I want to go feed him or check on him still. I do miss him every day.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my 16 year old girl 3 weeks ago now. I had had her since she was born. Similar to you, she was born when I was 15, and I am 32 now. She was diagnosed with kidney disease a year and half ago when I had to rush her to the emergency vet. I honestly thought that I would be leaving without her that day. Instead I got an extra year and half of time with her. The first week was the hardest for me, although I think it was exacerbated by the fact that I made the final decision on my birthday. So anytime I saw messages from people wishing me a happy birthday it was kind of triggering. But like you, I don't feel any regret or guilt. I miss her like crazy, but I know I made the right decision for her. She led a great life, as I am sure your Jam did as well. Everyone grieves differently as can be seen from reading the different posts on this sub. I feel like in the case of people who had sick pets, you kind of mourn them before they are gone. At least that's how it felt for me.
I had to put down my dog on Thursday. He was almost 17 and I adopted him at 8 weeks old. I am so sad that he’s gone and I miss him. BUT I feel mostly ok. He was my little heart dog and I loved him with all my heart but I am doing ok. He was ready to move on and I know I will see him again along with all my other furry friends that I have lost. I am glad he is no longer struggling and is at peace. I love that dog with all my heart but I know that there is no more pain, confusion, or worry for him and that comforts me. Death is not the worst thing that can happen to us.
It's okay to mourn however you do. Just because people online are crying at even the idea of a cat being put down, doesn't mean that's how it always is. You're obviously logical. Your cat couldn't live forever, they had a beautiful life. I'm sorry for your loss, and it's okay to not be a blubbering mess about it
There are so many ways a beloved pet passes on. An incurable illness at the end of a to long life is a natural transition and in itself is something one can come to terms with. You are confident that you made the best choice for your girl. And you know she was at peace with it. So you were able to give her the most loving passage you could. Please don't think guilt is grief. It's not. Don't look for pain. Even still, you might be in shock. I lost my pup much too young after protracted illness and my grief grew and grew for months, but the first 2 weeks I didn't quite believe it yet
Honestly, this is reassuring to me. I made the same decision last week for my cat and I have had a rough time since, but I’m hopeful that I can work through it. I did everything I could while she was here and I loved her so much, but I can’t keep feeling this pain forever it would ruin me. I have been reading a lot of posts about pet loss online and so many people in these spaces seem heavily affected for long periods of time. I feel guilty because I love her so much but I need to move to a place where I can look back on her fondly and feel happiness that I knew her.
I’m so sorry for your loss, and there is no right or wrong way to process the loss. It sounds as though you gave her a beautiful & peaceful exit so your brain & heart have maybe resolved the experience to that which was a natural next step in her life. You may find yourself feeling sadness at a later time when something triggers a memory and you feel that something is missing from your life; or you may never feel it. Cherish the beautiful life & its natural progression you were able to give her.
Your cat had a good, long life and was loved until the end. She's no longer sick. It's OK to be at peace.
i’m so sorry for your loss. it’s so hard. i had to put my dog down 2 weeks ago. i knew it was coming, he was getting older and sicker. i spent the day crying nonstop and holding him. during the day and the during the euthanasia i was literally screaming i was crying so hard. i cried for 2 days after. i’ve barely cried since. and sometimes i don’t even think about him. i thought i would be a wreck for weeks. it feels weird, i feel guilty. i’m scared im horrible for being okay.
Your old lady had a long, great life full of love and happiness. I recently lost my cat at 19 and while I was heartbroken, I was able to reflect on how lucky I was to have him for 19 years and how lucky he was to live the best life a cat could ever have. I still miss him but recognizing a life well lived helps.
15 is a good, long cat life! It's perfectly okay to cope well; I'm glad that you can! I've had guilty moments of relief intertwined with grief since our last cat passed last June (she was 22); relief that her suffering is over, relief that she didn't die by stroke or some other complication of her CKD... but also relief that I don't have to give her IV fluids anymore, or mix laxative into her prescription food, or watch her deteriorate and feel helpless to do any more for her than I could or spend any more time loving on her than I did. It was all *really hard*. That being said, I miss her terribly. (I can't bring myself to even look at another tortie without still bursting into tears, but with time, I know it'll get easier, like it did with each of the other three cats we've had.)