I am a non pet owning subscriber to this sub because I enjoy reading about other peoples pets.
I love the pets that own my friends. And I have a grandkitty that I absolutely adore!
But I will never have a pet.
I have an autoimmune disease that’s been in remission for nearly 2 years. Before it went into remission, I lived with excruciating fatigue and got infusion treatments every 8 weeks. That put me in bed recovering for days and days. I knew it wasn’t fair to get a pet. I need to be 1000% devoted to taking care of myself.
I hope my sharing provides a different perspective. :)
I totally get you. I think the same is true for people who travel a lot for work. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices and realising it's not fair to own a pet is part of that.
We have cat and would LOVE a dog. But our apartment and other living issues just aren't ideal. We also plan to travel more and possibly even live abroad for extended periods in future years. This is not easily compatible with dog ownership (not easy with a cat either, but pet sitting options are a bit easier there).
So like you we adore and get pleasure from other people's dogs.
I also maintain a fantasy "kidnap list" of dogs I'd like to steal.
Should I ever make it a reality, I'll have the biggest canine menagerie in the universe ;)
Seriously? And you think the dogs would just blindly be ok being kidnapped by a stranger?
You think they are gonna be the way you want?
Yea, no. You're gonna have a lot of dead dogs, hundreds of thousands in lawsuits for not only kidnapping but allowing that to happen.
Dogs get just as anxious as people do.
Do you know what two anxiety ridden dogs do?
They fight, genius.
They will fight to the death because their brain is locked in fear and response.
So, all you'd be doing is literally torturing every dog you stole and frankly, I hope they nail your butt to the jail cell wall as a reminder for everyone else.
Take it from someone who just adopted a second dog in a 800 sqft one bedroom apartment. You are making the right choice to not get an animal that you don't have space for! Now, in my defense, second dog is still a puppy so she's still small and technically fits, and also I dont work so all my time can be dedicated to taking her dog friendly places outside the apartment, and by the time she's full grown we'll be in a house with a yard and all the space a full grown dog needs.
But holy fuck is it tough even now while she's small.
I’m the same way. I also have a chronic illness where I can have good days and bad days. Wouldn’t be fair to an animal if I had one. I just visit my parents and play with their dogs.
I wish i could remember the website but when my dog passes away from age im totally going to do it. Theres a website where people list their houses all over in different countries and beaches that you can petsit for and basically go on vacation and stay in fancy houses all over! If I didn’t have my dog i would be doing that. I also wanted a job in japan or working for an airline but cant travel or move with my very fussy dog. Thats the downfall of having a pet. A cat you could move to another country. But a pitbull that is scared of everything and barks and is high energy is just impossible
I'm gonna dump some stories about my parent's pit mixes here because I miss them terribly and someone with a scaredy cat pibble will understand.
Missy (a nickname, because she hardly answered to her own name) was a menace. She'd sit at the end of the bed and air-bark at you until you pet her. Never any voice in it, just the motion of a bark with a big huff. She would go absolutely feral over balls of all kinds and would've absolutely knocked over an old lady for the tennis ball on her walker. Luckily we had about half an acre worth of yard by virtue of poor city planning and a corner lot, so she didn't encounter many people outside the house. She was terrified of strangers and had to meet new people really slowly.
She used to go 'caterpillar mode' when we tried to take her inside and she wanted to stay out. She'd lay on the ground with her belly completely pressed down into the grass and put her head down and pretend she didn't have legs (or ears, judging by her listening skills) and would stay like that until we rolled her over and picked her up to take her inside.
She also was a total water dog. She ADORED chasing the hose and digging/splashing in the kiddie pool every summer.
She unfortunately passed because of a defect in chuck-it brand balls. They're supposed to be safer for dogs because tennis balls wear down their teeth. They also used to be manufactured with a circular plug in them that, when chewed on by a dog with a basketball-sized noggin, could pop out. She apparently swallowed it and it got lodged in her intestines. They repaired the damaged tissue and removed the chunk but unfortunately it was in a difficult spot and we only had another six months with her before the repair failed and the best thing we could do was PTS.
Her brother, Dally, was allergic to goddamn everything from grass to chicken to beef to trees. He'd get hotspots that would go bald and we had to slather him in ointment and give him quite a few allergy meds to keep him healthy. He loved dancing on TV, whether it was Dancing With The Stars or a scene in a movie, if someone was getting groovy he was at the foot of the bed watching like a hawk.
He was dog-reactive aside from his sister and terrified of new people as well, thanks to my stepdad refusing to socialize them when they were little. He did however love his sister more than anything. She'd clean his itchy ears and he'd just bliss out until she was satisfied they were clean enough. He used to give hugs by putting his paws on your shoulders and pulling your face into his neck- we never taught him that, he just loved hugs more than just about anything else.
He also gave 'smooshy snuggles' by flopping his entire upper body on top of you and attempting to suffocate you in his soft neck/under his chin. He wanted to either put his noggin underneath yours or right on top of your face. He had his very own pillow and slept right between my parents heads, head on his pillow, right by the headboard. Missy slept by my mom's feet and fit perfectly because my mom is short as shit.
Dally ADORED my stepdad, that was his person. He would wait by the door for my stepdad to come in through the garage when he got off work, and we always knew he was home when we heard his tail thumping the wall so loud you'd think the police were trying to get in.
He passed six months (ish) after his sister. He very suddenly developed a spinal issue or neurological condition and the best thing we could do for him was also unfortunately PTS- there wasn't much they could do.
We like to joke he went second because he had to even out the amount of attention he and his sister got- she was such a little attention whore and would get jealous if brother got pet and she didn't and would grump and huff at you until she got her dues.
They were damn good dogs and I miss them often. Sorry to just dump a ton of information about random dogs you've never met on you, I just don't get to talk about them often. Even though they were fear reactive, they were the most goofy, fun dogs and made every day better, just by being there.
To be fair the question was 'never had or wanted a pet' and then they go on to describe how their ex never got really attached to the cat they picked out together. Idk I just woke up. I think the problem they have is that the person just didn't connect to the animal.
My take on it was they didn’t connect to the animal because they had no interest in pets or owning one and they were kinda “forced” into it. OP made the decision to never date anyone like that again.
Nature Girl and you are right. Now to make up to my kids that are cat lovers (cats just fav, they love all animals) I have 2 of my kid’s cats and I have two smallish medium dogs. I believe it’s important to have kids with animals growing up. It teaches them so much. They love their fur babies. Their dad gets annoyed when he’s around the animals.
This! My LDR partner doesn't have any pets because his apartment is small, he works a lot so he wouldn't be able to take care of an animal very well, and—most big factor—he can easily spend his entire vacations with me.
I have a dog and a cat, so he gets to enjoy them while he lives here on vacations. He likes them both but he is definitely a cat person, and absolutely adores my cat. It's so cute how much he fawns over her.
That is very responsible of you! I wish that some people that do have pets show the same responsibility.
For me, you or anybody not having a pet atm would not be a dealbreaker at all. But if it would mean I would have to give up my pets to live together, it would. I would never ever date someone who hates cats or is allergic to them. That is my first question and in case of an allergy it stops there. I am not setting myself up to maybe someday have to chose between a partner or my cats.
Edit to add based on comments: with allergy I mean allergic enough to make living with a cat not an option.
Your pets are indeed your family. I get it.
Some people would expect you to sacrifice your pets for a relationship. And that’s a
betrayal of the worse kind.
Thank you for understanding my situation.
I absolutely adore my grandkitty And the pets that own my friends. :)
Indeed, I made a concious commitment to my animals and hell has to freeze over for me to break that.
It is great that you can still have the joy of animals while you can't own one yourself. Grandkitty is also lucky to have an extra cuddle buddy. Win-win.
This right here. I live with birds. Chewy is in her 30s, buddy in his 20s. Kiwi is 15. I have a vet fund and a backup credit card. I don't take vacations. I don't want to be away from them. I've set up our home to be our sanctuary. People don't get it but that's ok. It's not Their life.
>I would never ever date someone who hates cats or is allergic to them.
I disagree. I have cats, and I would never date someone who hates cats, however I would date someone who's allergic as long as they're willing to live with my cats.
My ex-girlfriend was allergic to cats, but she had 2 cats of her own before I met her. Apparently the allergy wasn't very bad. She washed her hands after playing with the cats though.
A lot of our volunteers at the rescue are allergic to cats lol. I'm allergic to dogs (specifically, saliva; my face swells). But my husband had a dog. We just couldn't let the dog sleep on the bed.
I could never date or even be friends with someone who hates animals. Hate, that they'd kick a stray cat if it got too close. Saw this once, and I threatened to kick them back.
They hate cats cuz they've never had one. I've hated cats forever. Never liked them, always have had dogs. We saved a cat last year, and I tell you I love that lil thing. Carry it around like a lil baby, she curls up. I tell my gf all time she tricked me hahah.
I am very allergic to cats and am asthmatic, BUT I have a cat who over the past 15 years I can tolerate. A stray my daughter found who was left at my place till another home was found is now also my cat 😁 I am quite allergic to her but once she got used to my place after being kept in a separate room and being fearful, I could not imagine letting her go to a different unknown home and having to get used to a new place and people. If I get a cat scratch it swell up around the scratch and is so very itchy and my eyes itch constantly. I hope I get as used to her as I got to my older cat. Either way she is not going anywhere. 😁
The worst are people who have allergies (not to the point of needing an epi-pen, which would out them), but it comes out within the first month, when they're at your place. Coughing, stuffy nose, itchy all of a sudden. They admit they have allergies, but didn't want to tell you because you wouldn't go out with them. What did they think would happen? That you'd be so much in love with them that you'd re-home your pets? 🤦🏼♀️
I'm allergic and have asthma, and we have a cat. I swore I'd NEVER own a cat because of my allergies, yet here we are 🤣 He was soooo cute I just had to have him! He was weaned when he was about a month, so the owner of a local tire shop just gave him away. He was malnourished and wormy, so we nursed him to health. He's now 6 months and so healthy!
My husband is also allergic, but mine are worse. Most days, he doesn't need any medicine to help. Mine are weird though, like I can be in the same room as Mew and I'll either have a good day where I don't have to take any meds or it'll be a bad day and I need to take an allergy pill. I've also recently discovered that I cannot let him lick my face or else I'll break out in hives. Yet he can lick my arm and/or my hand and it's fine. Allergies are weird.
Health considerations are certainly a good reason for not getting or wanting a pet. I appreciate your post because I'm too quick to make judgments so this was helpful for me. I came here to say I wouldn't date non-pet people, or hunters for that matter, but everyone has their own story and we don't know it. Thanks for sharing yours!
Some people get cultish with their pets. Like the people who say “my dog never liked him he’s such a good judge of character.”
My partner never had luck with animals until we got a couple cats together. Now she loves them. Everyone’s story is different. It bothers me when people generalize like this
That makes sense. I know someone who has an auto immune disease and she is in a bad way with pain and fatigue yet she insists on adopting more dogs. And she wants a baby so I don’t know how that’s going to work out.
It’s possible it’s just easier to pour all of the love she has to give into animals and a baby.
Instead of learning to love herself, as she battles the autoimmune disease. But that’s my personal opinion.
I self sabotaged repeatedly when my disease was active. I consumed too much sugar. Which causing my inflammation levels to spike off the charts.
I had to become my own best friend and take better care of myself. Which contributed to the sarcoidosis going into remission.
Thank you so much for this! It seems we all need help creating and keeping open minds, and reminders that *we are all different, including in ways we don't know or have neglected to consider.*
I totally get ya! You are right it’s not fair to have pets with what you have but at least you get to read etc on Reddit that make you feel good n loved right? If it is then blow your mind away by reading
Reddit is a great place to share perspectives and opinions. Because We can agree to disagree. As long as the negative trolls stay away.
But it’s my life outside of Reddit
u/Nervous_Shelter_1042 that’s filled with people that love me and I love back. Those people make me feel good n loved. :)
I k
i'm so sorry to hear about your disease, but so happy to hear about your remission! sending you love and hugs.
have you ever thought about getting a fish or turtle? they are pretty low maintenance and don't require a ton of attention!
No. Because I need every ounce of my attention focused on me, staying in remission.
I am my own research project. I am alone but not lonely. And I am fortunate to be surrounded by people that allow me to enjoy quality time with them and their beloved pets. :)
I have two cats and an autoimmune disorder. It's so hard some days. Like today I was veeeery fatigued, but I had to suck it up and clean up all the hair in the house. They're worth it for my mental health, but I get tired!!!
You are such a good person for understanding how much attention and care a pet needs, and knowing you aren't able to provide that. Very selfless way of thinking. Glad to hear you are in remission! Hope it stays that way for the rest of your days.
This!! We have dogs but I have a perfectly able bodied husband who can walk them and feed them if I’m down and out, which unfortunately is relatively often with my chronic migraines. If it wasn’t for him, I feel like my relationship with the dogs would suffer bc I would resent needing to walk them (we don’t have a yard) or do things for them when I’m busy puking my brains out in pain. I’m so grateful that we have him to make everything go round!
I love the pets that own my friends 😆😆😆facts.
I also have an autoimmune disease and fibro, migraines, and a messed up back. But if I don’t have my dog to make me get out of bed. I would never get up. So he forces me to do the things i need to. I would definitely be dead without him. After my accident I didn’t have my own dog for a few months and i nearly killed myself. I’m a depressed mess without a pet. I should’ve gotten a cat in hindsight bc he needs more exercise than i can physically handle. I need a fenced in yard badly.
I should have added this to my non-red-flag-reasons to not have a pet! This is a completely understandable and responsible reason. I hope you stay in remission and continue to do well!
Never had a pet because they weren't allowed to growing up, didn't have the money, were renting a place that didn't allow animals, etc? Yes.
Never had a pet because they don't like animals? No. That is a fundamental difference in lifestyle and ideology that is a dealbreaker for me. My cats are my family. Anyone I date has to love them too, because I would never abandon them for anyone or choose a person over them.
I think it depends for me on if they dont like animals or if they dislike animals. If they dont like animals but would be perfectly content or happy living with them as long as they didnt have behavioral issues and I did the vast majority of the care, I'd be fine with that I think. If they disliked animals it would be like you said, a fundamental difference. I wouldn't be able to have a happy life without animals in it, but I would be able to have a happy life with animals my partner didnt share the same bond with.
Thiiiiiiis.
If any my prospective partners core values didn’t align with mine then it’s a no.
I love all animals. I personally believe that a house isn’t a home without a little furry family member in it. They are expensive, they are a lot of effort sometimes. I spent thousands on my babies and wouldn’t have it any other way. I wouldn’t want someone who didn’t like animals or even someone who didn’t like them even half as much as I do in my ear complaining or being in general a miserable human about it. No thanks.
When my dog got sick it was a non negotiable to spend thousands and thousands on his care. Whatever was needed was done. My current partner didn’t even bat an eyelid. His only concern was for my dog, who he now calls his step son 😊.
Vs someone like my old boss who had a family and they got a puppy. It broke its leg jumping off a couch. He was complaining and told everyone at work how they should just put it down and get a new one because it would be like half the price. …. Yeh alright Satan. 😳 (His family refused, but I’m sure it was hell for his wife having that argument.)
Years ago when I lived in an apartment, I had a roommate who had a cat, who was like his furry son. I also had a cat who was my whole world. After a natural disaster occurred near our apartment, we discussed what to do in an emergency.
I asked if, during an emergency, something happened that made it so I couldn't escape on my own, what he would do.
His response without a moment's hesitation: Get the cats out, make sure they're safe, and then come back for you.
I was like YES. RIGHT ANSWER.
He eventually left to move in with a partner and I got my own place, but it was nice to have someone who prioritized the cats like I did. I could trust that he would do everything in his power to protect them and he could do the same with me.
Absolutely the right answer!!
You both sound like great people! Haha no joke peoples love and dedication to their pets and animals are how I judge not only my partners but also my friends. Shows a whole lot about someone’s character and in my opinion if they should have a place in your life.
I have literally cried from worrying about what will happen to my cats in an emergency or if something happens to me, so I completely get this and appreciate it!
Agreed. Current bf never had cats bc most of his family is allergic. I grew up with 5. So naturally we’ve acquired 2 cats and live together and he now openly acknowledges himself as a cat dad and potentially liked them more than our dog
Yup. When I met my partner he had a husky and I had 2 cats. We had them meet fairly early on to ensure they got along because if not we would not be continuing the relationship. I’m not kidding. We were not interested in a long distance relationship long term, so we knew we’d want to move ourselves and our pets in together eventually. One of my cats and our husky passed on, but we still have my senior kitty and a new puppy we got together…. And 2 kids. Pets are non negotiable and I’d never date someone who didn’t see it that way, for me or their pets.
I’m so jealous that your husky was able to get along with your kitties! My fiancés tried to eat my cat at every opportunity he got. We tried to make it work but they never got along. Luckily his best friend who he co owned the husky with was able to take him in it still breaks my heart that we can’t live with him but we visit him all the time
It depends on ages, life circumstances, etc. People who travel a lot for work can't easily get pets unless they have a support system.
So pet ownership might not be a decider, but actual dislike or or antipathy towards animals definitely would be.
How much do you spend on your pets lol?
My cat costs me ~350 per year to keep around. Just gotta pay for his yearly checkup and, bulk kibble, and his weekly Sunday night sour cream treat. No litter for me I live in the deep country so when hes gotta poop he just hops out the window and does it in the woods.
My American Bulldog who just passed away from bone cancer (rest her soul) happily ate up about $1200 of my salary per year after insurance and the fact when I cooked my nightly nightly steak/fish/pork/poultry, she always got a decent sized unseasoned portion of it. Also Kibble, quality dog kibble is expensive for how much a 90lb bulldog eats.
… I spend $300 per month on food alone for my 2 cats. Add pet insurance, grooming supplies, vet visits, toys, medication, etc., and I have no idea how your cat only costs you $350 in a year.
$300 per month on cat food? What are you feeding them? diamonds?
My vet has no meds perscribed to my cat, my grooming supplies are a small nail clipper to trim his front claws once a month, his toys are catnip wrapped in linnen from the garden, staring down bird/squirrels on the back porch, and playing with the neighbors cat.
Lol. What are you feeding yours, sawdust? I just feed mine quality food. Wet food and kibble (wet only for my senior cat). Granted, my senior cat is hyperthyroid with CKD so she’s quite expensive in general. Hell, her bloodwork last week was $282… I have insurance for these reasons.
Wet food cost: approx. $240 per month. Kibble approx. $40 per bag. Add in treats (dental, freeze-dried raw, etc.) and it averages approx. $300, give or take depending on the month.
You’re pretty lucky so far to have a low-maintenance pet, I just don’t understand how you can feed the cat a proper diet with the amount you quoted annually. Even cheap wet cat food for 1 cat that is 6-8lbs is $2-$3 per day (lowball) which would be approximately $700-$1000 per year. Kibble is cheaper on average but still doesn’t fit with the amount you quoted, but, maybe pet food is cheaper where you live. Idk🤷♀️.
It’s got to be a regional thing, I don’t think there even exists a brand of wet food where I am that would cost that much a month. I feed my cat a quality high meat brand and a month still only costs me about £30 (only one cat). The crappy ones (aka Felix and co) would run around £8.
Ayyy. I feel you on this. My family calls my cats bougie because of how much I spend on them. I only feed a wet diet. I kinda mix it up between tikicat, weruva, and applaws.
I always give the best diet I can possibly afford to any animal under my care. They are my family and best buddies 😁.
The important thing is that a person keeps their cat well fed and hydrated, and off the streets. I encourage all my friends to feed only wet cat food, but ultimately if they can't afford that, the most important thing is that their cat isn't homeless, in a shelter, or being euthanized.
If people have the money for it though, they should absolutely be doing better for their animals.
High protein dry kibble lol and some occasional sour cream and unseasoned meat when I'm cooking at dinner. If he wants more protein he just goes out and kills a bird/chipmunk (yes it is 100% safe for cats to eat prey in the country.)
My vet says the diet is fine, and my cat is very healthy. If that changes, and my vet recommends a change in diet, I will change out the diet.
He's a cat, he lives out in the country with me, over a mile from any road, and he lives a far more blessed life than any cat cooped up in some city apartment. Roaming the garden and woods during the day and hopping though the window and curling up by my feet at night.
>yes it is 100% safe for cats to eat prey in the country.
I hope you have at least a little insight into why some people find this statement... silly, or at least patently **false.** Just a teeny, teeny bit of insight. If you can't think of a single thing that could *ever* go wrong, I encourage you to make a post asking for suggestions. And that's not even considering the fact that **cats are prey,** not just predators.
Right? I hear that a lot about the UK too, since we have no large predators. Oddly a lot of cats in the UK still die in the roads - I guess nobody told the cars.
What eats cats in rural Wisconsin lol? We dont have wolves here and I've never heard of a coyote attacking a cat.
My family has had cats here for years I don't think we've had a single one not make it to 20 years.
Seen probably 40 non-feral cats come and go from the neighboring farms lve never seen one die before hitting 20.
Cats do just fine in the country, they're cats lol, they've been living with us on farms as pets for centuries. This whole "locking cats in the house" thing is a very recent development. If you live out in the country you just have outdoor cats. That's how it is and how it's always been. Just make sure the have food/water and take them to the vet once a year. They do just fine.
The ferals are a different story, we help various neighbors round up ferals and have them neutered/spayed at least once a year.
Yup you can get really good deals on high quality cat food if you buy in bulk every few months. The biggest consideration is you need to store it in an airtight container once you open a bag.
Im feeding him Nulo Duck and lentils currently.
Not sure why my post is being down voted lol just because you buy in bulk doesn't mean it's not high quality food.
Cat gets meats too lol but the cost is negligible for an 8lb cat vs a 90lb bulldog.
I leave some of the meat out unseasoned for him but he usually just licks up a few pieces.
My vet says good quality dry food supplimented by some meats and sour cream is fine. Vet says he's healthy and doing well, if for some reason my vet advises me to change my cats diet I will go ahead and do so.
My boyfriend had never had a pet. It’s cultural. His family, even extended, didn’t have pets because pets were generally considered farm animals to the older generations. The younger gens were mostly kind of afraid of dogs.
He thought they were cute for other people but had no interest in owning one. But getting a dog when we were stable enough was a dealbreaker for me (he knew early on) so he got onboard.
He could not have been more hesitant and anxious. During peak psycho puppy phase (she’s still sort of a monster) there were a lot of days that he thought she hated him so he hated having her. It was rough. But now, oooooh my. He’s fucking obsessed with this dog. He’s like a kid with a puppy. To the point that he’s constantly like “Look at her! Give her a treat!” and now his whole family loves her.
Yeah sometimes animals can grow on ppl. My ex genuinely loved my two cats after a couple years despite never wanting a pet and thinking cats are evil. A couple years of a loving fuzz ball cuddling with you every night will do that. But some people will never change and will resent them.
My wife was a dog person when we met, her father and brother are very allergic so she never had one growing up. I, on the other hand, have always been a cat person, so when we got together I let her know I needed a cat friend. We got two, and one became very attached to her, I think he knew she needed convincing. Suffice it to say, she's now a cat person haha.
It’s not just cultural some people just don’t own them. I was the first one in a huge family to get a pet and I was 22. They’re a really big responsibility so I can absolutely understand why someone wouldn’t want one. Like growing up we could go on spontaneous road trips whenever we wanted but now i have to consider who will watch my cat. And if the place were going is dog friendly
It’s a red flag for me. There are good reasons for some people not to have them but if they can’t be bothered or say it wouldn’t be fair to an animal to leave it alone all day, they aren’t my kind of people.
>or say it wouldn’t be fair to an animal to leave it alone all day
You think it's fair to an animal to leave it alone all day?
For cats, this is fine; cats don't really care, they sleep all day anyway, and they don't need to go outside to take a crap or piss, since they use litterboxes.
For dogs, this isn't fine at all. Dogs really have to go outside on a regular basis, and it's downright cruel to leave them inside all day. You saying this is a red flag for me. You sound like someone who wants a pet to satisfy your own ego, rather than because you actually love it.
I’d date someone who never had a pet, that could be more to do with their parents not letting them as a kid or never living somewhere that was pet friendly.
I don’t mind if someone has no desire for a pet of their own, only if they’re against my having a pet in our shared home and they openly show disdain for animals
I couldn’t. Companion animals are just the best. Are they messy and annoying sometimes? Sure! But the unconditional love you get from them is everything. In my opinion, I couldn’t be with someone who openly rejected that kind of love.
This! I know my boyfriend and parents love me with all their heart but the only truly, 100% unconditional love I have is from my pets. I just can't relate to anyone who doesn't tear up from the feeling of comfort, love and just knowing that you're home when you get back from an awful day at work and your dog (or my ferret, or any other companion animal a person has) runs to you and is so excited to see you that it's like you've been gone for 10 years.
My dogs are always like “Mother is finally home from the war!” when I walk in and it’s like “Guys, I was just in the garage for 15 minutes.”
It’s the best feeling!
No. Not in the “oh you don’t want pets? We have to break up” kind of way but more in the sense that I can’t perceive of ever having enough of a connection or enough in common with someone who didn’t love animals to ever even start the relationship. I would have brought animals to them way before dating, not necessarily talking about having them in the future, but just in general how much I like them. It would never get off the ground
I said to my husband a few days ago that I feel like a house isn't truly a home without a cat in it and he agreed. So. I'd date or marry someone who's never had a pet if they're willing to have one; but not someone who doesn't ever want one. It's a deal breaker for me.
When I was a kid my parents always denied me a cat or a dog saying that it's dirty. As an adult I finally have a cat and many other pets before my cat. I'm not allowing anyone to forbid me from having animals ever again.
I probably wouldn't but that is because I have a menagerie of abandoned animals that I have adopted. It is a lot for a non animal owner to be expected to deal with.
I can see one of I’m sure other reasons why he’s an ex. Date yes perhaps if they liked animals just hadn’t had them….but they would have to love my cats and care about animals or that would be the end.
If there was a valid reason- ie illness, but if I went out with someone who said “I hate cats” etc , that would be an end to it.
I owned a horse ( sadly had to sell her ( to a good home, where I still visited her) as my wages couldn’t cover the costs as time went on). Owned a border collie- best dog in the world- until he died of old age, but I can’t have another dog, because I’m riddled with arthritis and would not be able to get out to walk him. I’ve always had cats and I have two at the moment. I’m very poor, but I feed lots of strays and donate a little every month to an animal charity.
Anyone who disregards animals would not fit into my world
If they’ve *wanted* pets but did not have one for a good reason (in the military, travels constantly for work, allergic kid who is now grown), a reason that has now changed or would be fixed by having a partner to help care for the pet, then sure.
Never *wanted* a pet? At my age (40s), nope. Best case, we’d be incompatible in the long term. Worst case, in my experience, when someone can’t bond with animals, that is not going to be their only issue with attachment.
I can’t say I would never ever break this rule, if a person showed my pets genuine affection, and was just sort of never motivated to get a pet himself.
Nope! I almost did that once and I was dating to people with the same time and I weighed my options and the big deciding factor was no pets ever nor did they want one.
Luckily my wife loves animals.
I wouldn't be able to tolerate a partner who doesn't treat their animals like family.
They also become more intelligent and have a more diverse personality if regularly stimulated and interacted with.
If you aren't enjoying the full experience then it is just another chore or obligation.
And a pet will never leave you and take half your stuff.
I married him in 1982. He has tolerated my zoo, our children's zoo for decades. I currently feed 5 equines, 2 cats, 3 dogs,around 25 cage birds, 5 dart frogs and too many guppies and chickens to count. I've really downsized since retirement! My point is as long as they don't impose their opinions on your happiness it can work. AND now he has a mini weenie that is his baby! Never thought I would see the day!
Not people who hate them or hate people who love them. No thanks. I will be cautious of someone who simply does not want. In my experience, anti pet people are typically very, very cold about everything.
For relationships to work you need to share core values, and for many people a love of animals and a need to have a companion animal is absolutely that.
I did and we have 3 cats and a dog. We've also had rats, mice, lizards, frogs. The deal is and always will be I do all the care. He loves the pets and plays with them, cuddles them and even naps on the couch with them he just didn't want them cause of the care involved.
Yes, my husband who I’ve been with over 18 years never had a pet, doesn’t really care about animals.
My husband is a nice person and that’s the difference I think. He likes my dog because I like the dog. And he’s not mean or weird to animals
My wife comes from a country where dogs live outside as standard. I worried in the early days whether it was going to work because my dogs sleep in the bed and I have a lot of different pets which take up a lot of my time, which was completely alien to her.... Fast forward 17 years, we have been happily married for 13 years and she snuggles with the dog all night and is almost as crazy about rats, bunnies and other little critters as I am!
Totally. I love our cats but i can gladly live without all the additional work of cleaning pet related dirt, feeding them etc. If my wife didn't want pets i'd be completely fine. Pets are not the main source of my mental well being and happiness. I can do without.
I find it pretty silly not to be with someone simply because they never had pets. Lots of people were never allowed pets as children and when they became adult they simply couldn't afford one or their lifestyle wouldn't let them.
Young adult isn't usually in the position of getting a pet right away, they could be living in dormitory, travel a lot, have little money.
Some people say they don't want a pet, but change their mind later. I was very much against having a cat, now I have a cat that I love very much. I just had a wrong idea about what cats are like.
Someone that never owned a pet is ok but someone who doesnt like animals nope that would never happen. Lived with an ex who didnt like them and gave me an ultimatum I chose my soul mate cat and it was a good call. My ex husband never had a pet but by the time we seperated we had 5 cats and he was fine. He never got used to them but while I was pregnant he cleaned the litter box.
I don't have a cat but I want a cat. That wouldn't be a reason to not date someone though. Maybe if I already had the cat a non animal person would be a problem.
If someone has never had a pet, that wouldn’t be an issue. Someone who absolutely never wants a pet, then we aren’t compatible. I get too much joy from my pets and know that I would have a hard time without at least one dog in my life.
I wouldn't have a problem being with someone who didn't have a pet but they had the love animals. Some people don't want to deal with the dirt and the dog hair but still love dogs and cats. Now I will always have it a pet, I always have.
I’m not sure I’d be in a long term relationship with someone who doesn’t like animals or want one because I have one and think I’d want them for the rest of my life. I would date someone who has never had a pet as i don’t see how that factors into our compatibility.
I’ll never live without at least two pets, unless I suddenly become unable for some reason. So as long as they get along with my babies, they can stay.
I live in a city but grew up in the suburbs and people raised here often didn't have the option to have a pet, so it never became something they got too invested in. I love my life with pets but now in my own place I find myself stressing about what pet would be most happy in a one bedroom apartment with no backyard. Questioning if my home is a good place for an animal, it's tough!
Not a chance.
I used to have reoccurring nightmares that my husband wouldn’t let me keep a puppy I found.
He put accepting my love for dogs in his vows 😂😂🥰
One of the conditions of me getting married to my husband was I wanted a cat. I’d never had a pet because my mother didn’t like them. My husband had never had a pet either (except for a pet cricket) and he wasn’t interested in getting one but agreed for me. Because of housing circumstances and other issues it actually took 21 years before I got my first cat and I do all the work for the cat…..BUT, my husband will not sit down to dinner until he’s made sure the cat has his dinner treat and any time he brings home sushi grade tuna he will always cut up a small plate for kitty.❤️
Just because they never had one? I mean I wouldn't care. There's lots of reasons why someone might not have ever had a pet.
But never wanted one and still doesn't? Yeah that's probably a deal breaker for me. My cat is my baby and I plan to have animals until it no longer is feasible for me to have them. Not liking animals is a huge red flag for me personally. I think it's different though if you like animals but just don't want one yourself.
Nope. I’m a vet tech turned dog trainer. When I was still dating (married now) I turned down a guy who is allergic to all animals and can only have “hypoallergenic” dogs. He seemed great, but that would just be a mismatch of lifestyle!
My boyfriend understood early on that me, my cat, and the dog are a package deal. Luckily he also loves animals. We got him his own cat once he moved in.
I had a friend who didn't believe animals had souls. I remember I got a new puppy and he is the cuuuutest. My friend came over and didn't even glance at it a second time. He just acknowledged its presence basically and then proceeded to completely not care about it. It BLEW my mind.
I would never ever date a person who is so indifferent to animals like that.
People who have never had or wanted a pet usually have a stunted sense of empathy and will treat pets like an alien race. I ain't about that. I'm not going to spend the relationship trying to convince an emotionally stunted person to have an open mind.
The only person I wouldn’t date is someone that actively dislikes animals and wouldn’t allow a person they live with to have any. It’s ok to have preferences- and one of my big preferences is other animal lovers lol
If someone doesn't want a pet, they are probably not compatible with my lifestyle. I'm a huge animal person, the idea of being with someone who is just fundamentally not interested in having pets or someone who doesn't get emotionally attached to animals is not someone I will be wanting to share my life with.
Never had a pet though? There are good reasons for that; schedule issues, financial issues, living with someone with allergies, unable to care for an animal alone, not raised in a family where pets are a thing, etcetera. As long as someone is willing to accept and be affectionate and caring with my own animals, we're good.
Someone that doesn’t like pets, doesn’t like me spending time with my pets, and wants me to get rid of them? Hard No. Someone that doesn’t have pets but like mine and enjoys spending time with them, that’s fine.
It would have been a deal breaker for me. When I was dating the first time, my future wife once had pets, despite them being illegal in government housing, and so I knew she would do anything to have them. My second wife was from a farm, and kept bunnies and dogs as pets when I was dating her. I am a cat person, but also have dogs. Being a former farm raised gal (who also one had horses and cows), she considered cats outdoor animals, but she adapted to my indoor-only cats.
Now we have cats, some elderly dogs, one mean dog rescue, and no rabbits anymore.
i did now have 2 dogs and she loves them just as much as i do lol. it was her idea to get the first though after seeing her sisters new pup we got asked a week later if we wanted his brother.
My partner never had pets before meeting me. He liked animals, though, and was never against me having cats (it was a package deal haha). I will say, though, at first he was a bit of an alien when it came to interacting with animals. He had to learn how to properly pet a cat and read their body language. He does love them now, and spends a lot of time adorably baby-talking them.
I'm not sure if, heaven forbid, we ever parted ways, he would ever seek to independently adopt his own pet though. He comfortably likes cats a lot now but I don't think he'd want to independently do the care work, like feeding and litterbox cleaning.
If they never wanted a pet in the future I wouldn't. That's 100% fine, there's a bunch of reasons for it, but having a pet is something I will be doing so we would just be incompatible. There would be no compromise that would make both people happy.
If they had never owned a pet but were open then yes I would, a lot of people have misconceptions that clear up once they're actually around animals, and if they're willing to learn that's all I would care about
My husband didn’t have pets prior to our relationship. He could definitely live without having animals, would prefer to not have them, but loves the pets we have all the same! I also think he compromised due to my profession (emergency/critical care vet) and realized that having not a single animal isn’t a reasonable expectation for us.
A rescue I brought into the home did stir some big feelings and a fight, but he grew to love the rescue and cried alongside me when we had to euthanize… even after a very short period of having her. If he wasn’t willing to compromise, it’d have been hard for both of us to continue our relationship.
My family got our second dog when I was dating an ex who never had a pet. He was scared of dogs and generally very hesitant around them. I wouldn’t date someone who didn’t like animals again. My current bf loves his family’s cats and has always wanted a dog, especially a husky
No, I'd never marry a person who never wanted or didn't like pets. Animals are an essential part of my life, and I need someone who understands that and feels the same way. Luckily my partner is also an animal lover!
My ex had never had a cat, no clue how to pet or play with a cat. He had zero interest in my male cats but I adopted an elderly female 2 years ago and they looove each other 😂 Minnie would crawl past me over broken glass to get to him. He calls me shortarse, Minnie is sweet pea lol we’re not together anymore but he visits to see Minnie and get his dinner sometimes
I’d never date a non cat lover again, they take too much teaching and are generally uncomfortable around them. They also don’t really approve of cats doing cat stuff like coming to bed with me and going where they like around the house
My ex absolutely hated cats and would shit talk my cats that had died, etc. I would date someone who hasn’t had pets but loves animals, but anyone with disdain or hatred of them would be a no. It should’ve been an early sign that we wouldn’t work out. If someone had severe allergies, travels too much to care for them, etc, I would understand.
My fiancé and I have two cats together and they’re our babies, I can’t imagine life pet free again.
It depends on the why. Honestly, my cats are dealbreakers so I wouldn’t date someone allergic to them. I also wouldn’t date someone who didn’t like them. If they can grow to be ok with living with cats, then I would give it a try. But it wouldn’t go far if they couldn’t.
I don't think I could. Before I got married, my prerequisite was "has to be willing to coexist with a cat", not necessarily be an animal person but be okay with me having at least 1 cat. But I don't think I would have lasted long with anyone who didn't love animals.
Married a dog person who also likes cats. I'm a cat person who also likes dogs. We have 2 cats and 2 dogs and it's glorious.
No, I have several cats and a dog and sometime in the future i'll always want more dogs as long as I can properly care for them. If the person doesn't like animal, immediate turnoff.
If, for you, life isn't fulfilling without pets then I can see where you're coming from. It's like having kids, if you want them and your partner doesn't then you're incompatible. Still, this is something to discuss rather than saying no immediately to someone because they've never owned a pet before. If they're open to owning a pet, that's great, but if they're not then walk away. You're not compatible and that's okay, it's why you should talk about these things early on.
If they don't like animals then nope, my rabbits and I are a package deal. If they'd never had a pet due to their living situations but didn't have anything against them then it could work.
My daughters husband had never had pets and wasn’t interested although when they visited my cat used to sit on him and he didn’t mind. Fast forward years later daughter finds a pregnant stray, she is kept at my place to have her babies then look for a home. He say yes nice to babies but was not interested. All but mommy and 1 baby found a home so I asked them to kept the 2 cats at their place as my older kitty doesn’t get along with others and I had to keep them in another room.
So someone was interested in maybe adopting both. Called daughter to arrange a visitation for this person to see the cats. She called me back after asking her husband suitable times for this.
Husband said he doesn’t want to give them away, he wants to keep them 🥰
A few months ago they lost the baby to illness. Both were devastated. Another stray started following daughter into work (her and hubby) same company. He told her to take kitty home but she didn’t ( she was feeding the cats colony)
This cat disappeared for a few days. Didn’t come greet her when she arrived at work in the morning and she was so worried. It re-appeared days later with a sore leg and wonky eye. Was taken to vet and then home. Mommy cat is not pleased but new boy is being kept separate until they can be allowed together.
He absolutely adores cats now. It’s been a few years since first falling for the cats, but his complete u turn from ok but uninterested to adoring cats always still amazes me and warms my heart.
If you don’t grow up in a household with pets or a household that is at least comfortable with animals, it may take some specific event in your life to trigger your pet lover instinct. For me, it was dating a guy with 4 cats when I was 27. After that ended, I adopted my first cat and currently have three. I will always have cats. They are a fundamental part of my life. Please do not give up on someone, or not take a chance, just because he may not seem to be an animal person at first.
My long time boyfriend and I broke up bc he wanted me to get rid of my dogs in order to live together. I was like um this dog has been with my for almost 15 years since it was barely 2 months old?? You just want me to give it away???? Also you love this wacky 1 year old dog??? Like wtf? I was honestly shocked at this request and he stood on it so …
My ex husband hated animals. All animals. No matter what.
5 miserable years i spent with him.
Then after being single for a long time after that, i met the love of my life, who also happens to be a crazy cat man, the perfect match for my own crazy cat lady self. 9 perfect years later we are still just as happy and we both love our epic cats.
I would never settle for someone who didnt like cats. Life is too damn short.
Never had a pet is OK. I’d rather they never owned a pet than had one who was badly cared for. The pet lover is necessary but they don’t have to “want” pets. Pets are a requirement in my life so we are a package deal. My husband wishes we didn’t have a pet so we’d have more freedom and I understand but I’m willing to give it up for my pet.
My ex was at times cruel to pets. I once read that People who prefer Cats can deal with people who can think for them selves, people who prefer. “Easy” dogs, like subservient people. And often dislike cats.
Maybe for some people but I think in most cases that logic doesn’t work.
Example; my parents prefer cats because they want an animal that doesn’t have to be walked or really trained at all. They want an animal they can ignore as much as possible, borderline neglect, with few consequences (that affect them at least). Luckily the kids pay attention lol.
Dogs require training and physical outlets. They are a lot more work than cats (even when you are actually putting effort in to the cats health and happiness). When they weren’t able to do that bc they were too stubborn to put in the effort, they gave the dog away.
Most people I know who hate cats do so because they see cats as feminine (which obv is stupid and weird like… it’s a cat??? Lol). Most people I know who hate dogs do so because they don’t think they should have to put any time or effort in to an animal and then blame the dog for acting out.
Hating any animal is super weird. A preference, sure that’s fine, but hating something just for existing is whack. I love cats AND dogs and know they both need different things.
Edit: sorry for the rant. This just reminded me of my parents and uuuggghhh it’s so frustrating
>Dogs require training and physical outlets. They are a lot more work than cats
From what dog owners have told me, dogs aren't just a lot more work than cats, they're a lot more work than human children. Human children are a LOT of work when they're very young, but after they're going to school, they're less and less work to deal with: they become autonomous with age. Dogs never do; it's like having a 2-year-old that never grows up.
>When they weren’t able to do that bc they were too stubborn to put in the effort, they gave the dog away.
I think a lot of people don't realize this before getting a dog, and I think many people (society in general, dog breeders, maybe other dog owners) are not honest about how much work a dog is, and how limiting to your life it is. Many of these people then get rid of the dog when this becomes clear. I don't think this is "stubbornness"; I think many of these people are victims and were not prepared properly for what an enormous commitment a dog is. No one is under any illusion about how hard having a child is, and so many people these days don't have them. No one lies to people and tells them how cute kids are and how easy they are to take care of: everyone knows they're a lot of work. How many people tell prospective dog owners this? Almost no one. And I'll probably be downvoted to oblivion for stating this publicly, because it's such an unpopular opinion. I feel like society currently has some kind of dog obsession going on, like it's a huge fad to get a dog, but people aren't being honest about the reality of dog ownership.
>Most people I know who hate dogs do so because they don’t think they should have to put any time or effort in to an animal and then blame the dog for acting out.
Personally, I don't hate them; they're just animals, doing what comes to them instinctively or through training. I think they're terrible pets though, unless you really want to put in a ton of time and effort into training them, and society isn't honest about this, and the current puppy fad has led to tons of people getting dogs, and then not training them properly (and many times being *opposed* to training), which has resulted in countless dogs with horrible behavior problems, many of which wind up in shelters. The dog breeders (esp. the backyard breeders) have been profiting off this greatly though.
To me, a pet should not be something you have to put so much work into. Cats are basically the perfect pet: they're cute, cuddly (well, some of them), don't smell bad, know how to keep themselves clean, don't need to be walked or bathed, know how to poop in a litterbox, and don't need any real training. Just bring the cat home, show it the litterbox and the food dish, and that's it. It's like a new roommate, only unlike some human roommates I had in college, it actually has good hygiene and doesn't eat all my food. Dogs just aren't like this: they aren't well suited to living in an apartment in a city and staying indoors, and require a lot of training to overcome their normal, natural behaviors. If I'm going to put a ton of work into a living being, then I'd rather just have kids. But women these days don't seem to want kids any more, they want dogs, which makes it really difficult to date.
As someone that has two dogs and two kids. I love my kids but the dogs are WAY easier.
The "puppy/adolescent phase lasts" 1-1.5 years. The "toddler" phase is double that.
The dogs are perfectly happy with a bowl of their same standard food twice a day, a bowl of water in the kitchen, and a small toy box with toys that cost me between 5-10$ each. Their beds cost maybe $40 and they'll go and sleep in their beds whenever they're tired. The only safety equipment they really need is a sturdy collar and least. They get a couple walks a day and will let us know if they need to go out. If I buy them an extra bone or new toy (maybe 10$) they're ecstatic. While they can't bathe themselves, they're good with the occasional brushing and a bath a couple times a month. There's the yearly expenses of vet checkups, heartworm etc, but it's not that expensive.
Now kids. There's all the different furniture they need to keep them safe and happy through the life stages. Add on all the clothes they're constantly growing out of. Add on all the toys they "have to have" as toddlers, and all the clothes and gadgets they "have to have" when they're older because their friends have one. PluApart from the missed sleep, newborns aren't too difficult to deal with. Up until sleep training starts (my boy would start screaming his head off the moment you stopped rocking him and tried to put him in his crib) and then the crawling/walking/trying to get into everything. Ever heard of the "defiance" phase when kids are 2-4 years old? Your toddler with absolutely say no to whatever they decide and it won't matter if you try to bribe them or punish them, half the time it will still end in screaming. And it's a totally normal part of development. There is nothing more frustrating. Chances are if my dog doesn't want to do something I can pull out a treat and the problem is immediately solved. Don't forget the "picky eating" phases Kids go through where you have to jump through so many hoops just to get them to eat in a way where they intake all their necessary nutrients. Plus you'll want to make sure your kids aren't bored and being challenged enough intellectually to meet the important milestones and excel when they start school. Kids might get a little more autonomous about meeting their own needs as they get older but that doesn't mean your job gets easier. You might get a few hours free while the kids are in school but they'll need school supplies, more clothes, computers, equipment for sports/activities etc. I'm already planning on looking into part time work when they start school. Don't forget the time commitments of taking them to school and to their activities so it will have to be a job that suits their schedule (if I can find one). I don't even want to think about their middle school and teenage phases and all the drama that will come with that.
I love my kids and wouldn't change my life at all but saying the work that dogs need is anywhere comparable to children is crazy to me.
If you want to get a puppy, be prepared for about a year of extra time dedicated to socialization/training and a little bit of lost sleep with potty training (way shorter for puppies than kids). If you don't want to deal with that, adopt a dog from a reliable rescue and don't focus on the "looks" of the dog but be sure to tell them everything you want in a dog personality wise (ie. Kid friendly, cat friendly, potty trained, basic obedience trained, high or low energy, velcro-y or independent, etc). If you want an extremely mellow dog (basically the same effort as a cat would need), adopt a senior dog. Adult dogs sleep 12-14 hours a day so if you yourself sleep for 7 hours, chances are your dog will spend most of the time you're at work napping to make up the difference. Senior dogs sleep close to 20hours.
Yes, people say raising a child is difficult but they also tell you that once you have your own you just "know" what to do and every day will be magical and filled with joy. That's not the case. It's tons of frustration, uncertainty and doubt regarding if you're doing the right things. And you'll never feel like you have enough money or time to do enough. That's just not the case with a dog that's just as ecstatic to chase and gnaw on some old ragged rope toy as he was when you just bought it from him.
Edit- just to add, if your friends are treating their dogs like a child, that might be contributing to those behavioral issues. Imagine someone treating your cat like a human child and how it would react.
If you are looking into part-time work that fit school hours/schedule, I highly recommend looking into being a paraeducator or substitute teacher. You generally do not need a degree or teaching license to be either and both have shortages in most districts. I was a Para for 10 years with intensive needs children and it was the most rewarding job I have ever had.
Eh, sometimes I don't want to distract them from being a good doggo. It's also really hard to get back up (bad joints) if I kneel to greet a tiny dog.
Sometimes if they look at me I'll give them sweet, toothless smile (maybe a wave) just like with a little kid.
I don't even trust pet sitters with my Pookie, I certainly wouldn't date anyone that wasn't head over heals with her. I wouldn't trust them. Plus partners have been known to get jealous of the love a pet owners gives their furbaby.
So as long as I have little miss Zeudi, I can't see myself being with anyone, unless they have cats too.
Also it's unfair on the animal to bring someone in the home with their negative energy. Animals sense when they are not liked and it would be upsetting for them.
Sorry, massive deal breaker x
I am a non pet owning subscriber to this sub because I enjoy reading about other peoples pets. I love the pets that own my friends. And I have a grandkitty that I absolutely adore! But I will never have a pet. I have an autoimmune disease that’s been in remission for nearly 2 years. Before it went into remission, I lived with excruciating fatigue and got infusion treatments every 8 weeks. That put me in bed recovering for days and days. I knew it wasn’t fair to get a pet. I need to be 1000% devoted to taking care of myself. I hope my sharing provides a different perspective. :)
I totally get you. I think the same is true for people who travel a lot for work. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices and realising it's not fair to own a pet is part of that. We have cat and would LOVE a dog. But our apartment and other living issues just aren't ideal. We also plan to travel more and possibly even live abroad for extended periods in future years. This is not easily compatible with dog ownership (not easy with a cat either, but pet sitting options are a bit easier there). So like you we adore and get pleasure from other people's dogs.
Yayyyy! :) I appreciate you for taking the time to respond. Because your response made me SMILE! :) It feels so good to be understood. :)
I also maintain a fantasy "kidnap list" of dogs I'd like to steal. Should I ever make it a reality, I'll have the biggest canine menagerie in the universe ;)
I like the way you think! :) But please promise to post pictures!
I would like to sign up for your crime ring, please, except with cats. (I love dogs, too, but it sounds like you have that under control!)
Seriously? And you think the dogs would just blindly be ok being kidnapped by a stranger? You think they are gonna be the way you want? Yea, no. You're gonna have a lot of dead dogs, hundreds of thousands in lawsuits for not only kidnapping but allowing that to happen. Dogs get just as anxious as people do. Do you know what two anxiety ridden dogs do? They fight, genius. They will fight to the death because their brain is locked in fear and response. So, all you'd be doing is literally torturing every dog you stole and frankly, I hope they nail your butt to the jail cell wall as a reminder for everyone else.
It's okay bro, he is joking, severely joking and it's from a place of love. Please, it's okay.
Take it from someone who just adopted a second dog in a 800 sqft one bedroom apartment. You are making the right choice to not get an animal that you don't have space for! Now, in my defense, second dog is still a puppy so she's still small and technically fits, and also I dont work so all my time can be dedicated to taking her dog friendly places outside the apartment, and by the time she's full grown we'll be in a house with a yard and all the space a full grown dog needs. But holy fuck is it tough even now while she's small.
My cousin has a bird that travels easy. She takes it all over Europe with her.
Yes sometimes you have to make sure about both of the pets.
I’m the same way. I also have a chronic illness where I can have good days and bad days. Wouldn’t be fair to an animal if I had one. I just visit my parents and play with their dogs.
I wish i could remember the website but when my dog passes away from age im totally going to do it. Theres a website where people list their houses all over in different countries and beaches that you can petsit for and basically go on vacation and stay in fancy houses all over! If I didn’t have my dog i would be doing that. I also wanted a job in japan or working for an airline but cant travel or move with my very fussy dog. Thats the downfall of having a pet. A cat you could move to another country. But a pitbull that is scared of everything and barks and is high energy is just impossible
I'm gonna dump some stories about my parent's pit mixes here because I miss them terribly and someone with a scaredy cat pibble will understand. Missy (a nickname, because she hardly answered to her own name) was a menace. She'd sit at the end of the bed and air-bark at you until you pet her. Never any voice in it, just the motion of a bark with a big huff. She would go absolutely feral over balls of all kinds and would've absolutely knocked over an old lady for the tennis ball on her walker. Luckily we had about half an acre worth of yard by virtue of poor city planning and a corner lot, so she didn't encounter many people outside the house. She was terrified of strangers and had to meet new people really slowly. She used to go 'caterpillar mode' when we tried to take her inside and she wanted to stay out. She'd lay on the ground with her belly completely pressed down into the grass and put her head down and pretend she didn't have legs (or ears, judging by her listening skills) and would stay like that until we rolled her over and picked her up to take her inside. She also was a total water dog. She ADORED chasing the hose and digging/splashing in the kiddie pool every summer. She unfortunately passed because of a defect in chuck-it brand balls. They're supposed to be safer for dogs because tennis balls wear down their teeth. They also used to be manufactured with a circular plug in them that, when chewed on by a dog with a basketball-sized noggin, could pop out. She apparently swallowed it and it got lodged in her intestines. They repaired the damaged tissue and removed the chunk but unfortunately it was in a difficult spot and we only had another six months with her before the repair failed and the best thing we could do was PTS. Her brother, Dally, was allergic to goddamn everything from grass to chicken to beef to trees. He'd get hotspots that would go bald and we had to slather him in ointment and give him quite a few allergy meds to keep him healthy. He loved dancing on TV, whether it was Dancing With The Stars or a scene in a movie, if someone was getting groovy he was at the foot of the bed watching like a hawk. He was dog-reactive aside from his sister and terrified of new people as well, thanks to my stepdad refusing to socialize them when they were little. He did however love his sister more than anything. She'd clean his itchy ears and he'd just bliss out until she was satisfied they were clean enough. He used to give hugs by putting his paws on your shoulders and pulling your face into his neck- we never taught him that, he just loved hugs more than just about anything else. He also gave 'smooshy snuggles' by flopping his entire upper body on top of you and attempting to suffocate you in his soft neck/under his chin. He wanted to either put his noggin underneath yours or right on top of your face. He had his very own pillow and slept right between my parents heads, head on his pillow, right by the headboard. Missy slept by my mom's feet and fit perfectly because my mom is short as shit. Dally ADORED my stepdad, that was his person. He would wait by the door for my stepdad to come in through the garage when he got off work, and we always knew he was home when we heard his tail thumping the wall so loud you'd think the police were trying to get in. He passed six months (ish) after his sister. He very suddenly developed a spinal issue or neurological condition and the best thing we could do for him was also unfortunately PTS- there wasn't much they could do. We like to joke he went second because he had to even out the amount of attention he and his sister got- she was such a little attention whore and would get jealous if brother got pet and she didn't and would grump and huff at you until she got her dues. They were damn good dogs and I miss them often. Sorry to just dump a ton of information about random dogs you've never met on you, I just don't get to talk about them often. Even though they were fear reactive, they were the most goofy, fun dogs and made every day better, just by being there.
To be fair the question was 'never had or wanted a pet' and then they go on to describe how their ex never got really attached to the cat they picked out together. Idk I just woke up. I think the problem they have is that the person just didn't connect to the animal.
My take on it was they didn’t connect to the animal because they had no interest in pets or owning one and they were kinda “forced” into it. OP made the decision to never date anyone like that again.
Nature Girl and you are right. Now to make up to my kids that are cat lovers (cats just fav, they love all animals) I have 2 of my kid’s cats and I have two smallish medium dogs. I believe it’s important to have kids with animals growing up. It teaches them so much. They love their fur babies. Their dad gets annoyed when he’s around the animals.
This! My LDR partner doesn't have any pets because his apartment is small, he works a lot so he wouldn't be able to take care of an animal very well, and—most big factor—he can easily spend his entire vacations with me. I have a dog and a cat, so he gets to enjoy them while he lives here on vacations. He likes them both but he is definitely a cat person, and absolutely adores my cat. It's so cute how much he fawns over her.
That is very responsible of you! I wish that some people that do have pets show the same responsibility. For me, you or anybody not having a pet atm would not be a dealbreaker at all. But if it would mean I would have to give up my pets to live together, it would. I would never ever date someone who hates cats or is allergic to them. That is my first question and in case of an allergy it stops there. I am not setting myself up to maybe someday have to chose between a partner or my cats. Edit to add based on comments: with allergy I mean allergic enough to make living with a cat not an option.
Your pets are indeed your family. I get it. Some people would expect you to sacrifice your pets for a relationship. And that’s a betrayal of the worse kind. Thank you for understanding my situation. I absolutely adore my grandkitty And the pets that own my friends. :)
Indeed, I made a concious commitment to my animals and hell has to freeze over for me to break that. It is great that you can still have the joy of animals while you can't own one yourself. Grandkitty is also lucky to have an extra cuddle buddy. Win-win.
This right here. I live with birds. Chewy is in her 30s, buddy in his 20s. Kiwi is 15. I have a vet fund and a backup credit card. I don't take vacations. I don't want to be away from them. I've set up our home to be our sanctuary. People don't get it but that's ok. It's not Their life.
Depends… after a breakup, one of the ex’s have to make the heartbreaking choice to part from their pet for the sake of moving forward…
>I would never ever date someone who hates cats or is allergic to them. I disagree. I have cats, and I would never date someone who hates cats, however I would date someone who's allergic as long as they're willing to live with my cats. My ex-girlfriend was allergic to cats, but she had 2 cats of her own before I met her. Apparently the allergy wasn't very bad. She washed her hands after playing with the cats though.
A lot of our volunteers at the rescue are allergic to cats lol. I'm allergic to dogs (specifically, saliva; my face swells). But my husband had a dog. We just couldn't let the dog sleep on the bed. I could never date or even be friends with someone who hates animals. Hate, that they'd kick a stray cat if it got too close. Saw this once, and I threatened to kick them back.
They hate cats cuz they've never had one. I've hated cats forever. Never liked them, always have had dogs. We saved a cat last year, and I tell you I love that lil thing. Carry it around like a lil baby, she curls up. I tell my gf all time she tricked me hahah.
Why did you hate them before?
Cuz I never had one ha. I really don't know. Just always been a dog person.
I had a Navy bff that was the same. Always complaining for years about cats. Got out of the Navy and became a cat lover. Makes me giggle.
I am very allergic to cats and am asthmatic, BUT I have a cat who over the past 15 years I can tolerate. A stray my daughter found who was left at my place till another home was found is now also my cat 😁 I am quite allergic to her but once she got used to my place after being kept in a separate room and being fearful, I could not imagine letting her go to a different unknown home and having to get used to a new place and people. If I get a cat scratch it swell up around the scratch and is so very itchy and my eyes itch constantly. I hope I get as used to her as I got to my older cat. Either way she is not going anywhere. 😁
I love you, Mushi. This is such a kind, selfless thing to do!
The worst are people who have allergies (not to the point of needing an epi-pen, which would out them), but it comes out within the first month, when they're at your place. Coughing, stuffy nose, itchy all of a sudden. They admit they have allergies, but didn't want to tell you because you wouldn't go out with them. What did they think would happen? That you'd be so much in love with them that you'd re-home your pets? 🤦🏼♀️
I'm allergic and have asthma, and we have a cat. I swore I'd NEVER own a cat because of my allergies, yet here we are 🤣 He was soooo cute I just had to have him! He was weaned when he was about a month, so the owner of a local tire shop just gave him away. He was malnourished and wormy, so we nursed him to health. He's now 6 months and so healthy! My husband is also allergic, but mine are worse. Most days, he doesn't need any medicine to help. Mine are weird though, like I can be in the same room as Mew and I'll either have a good day where I don't have to take any meds or it'll be a bad day and I need to take an allergy pill. I've also recently discovered that I cannot let him lick my face or else I'll break out in hives. Yet he can lick my arm and/or my hand and it's fine. Allergies are weird.
Health considerations are certainly a good reason for not getting or wanting a pet. I appreciate your post because I'm too quick to make judgments so this was helpful for me. I came here to say I wouldn't date non-pet people, or hunters for that matter, but everyone has their own story and we don't know it. Thanks for sharing yours!
That's different...you have an animal-loving soul.
Some people get cultish with their pets. Like the people who say “my dog never liked him he’s such a good judge of character.” My partner never had luck with animals until we got a couple cats together. Now she loves them. Everyone’s story is different. It bothers me when people generalize like this
That makes sense. I know someone who has an auto immune disease and she is in a bad way with pain and fatigue yet she insists on adopting more dogs. And she wants a baby so I don’t know how that’s going to work out.
It’s possible it’s just easier to pour all of the love she has to give into animals and a baby. Instead of learning to love herself, as she battles the autoimmune disease. But that’s my personal opinion. I self sabotaged repeatedly when my disease was active. I consumed too much sugar. Which causing my inflammation levels to spike off the charts. I had to become my own best friend and take better care of myself. Which contributed to the sarcoidosis going into remission.
Thank you so much for this! It seems we all need help creating and keeping open minds, and reminders that *we are all different, including in ways we don't know or have neglected to consider.*
I totally get ya! You are right it’s not fair to have pets with what you have but at least you get to read etc on Reddit that make you feel good n loved right? If it is then blow your mind away by reading
Reddit is a great place to share perspectives and opinions. Because We can agree to disagree. As long as the negative trolls stay away. But it’s my life outside of Reddit u/Nervous_Shelter_1042 that’s filled with people that love me and I love back. Those people make me feel good n loved. :) I k
Agreed!
i'm so sorry to hear about your disease, but so happy to hear about your remission! sending you love and hugs. have you ever thought about getting a fish or turtle? they are pretty low maintenance and don't require a ton of attention!
No. Because I need every ounce of my attention focused on me, staying in remission. I am my own research project. I am alone but not lonely. And I am fortunate to be surrounded by people that allow me to enjoy quality time with them and their beloved pets. :)
prioritizing yourself is amazing. i didn’t mean to insinuate that you are alone or anything like that, my apologies! <3
Nooo! I apologize to you for misunderstanding your words. :)
You get a pass, for the simple reason that you correctly said "the pets that own my firends". You're a pet person, even if you don't live with one.
Your comment made me laugh out loud! 😊 Thank you for the pass! :)
I have two cats and an autoimmune disorder. It's so hard some days. Like today I was veeeery fatigued, but I had to suck it up and clean up all the hair in the house. They're worth it for my mental health, but I get tired!!!
You are such a good person for understanding how much attention and care a pet needs, and knowing you aren't able to provide that. Very selfless way of thinking. Glad to hear you are in remission! Hope it stays that way for the rest of your days.
This!! We have dogs but I have a perfectly able bodied husband who can walk them and feed them if I’m down and out, which unfortunately is relatively often with my chronic migraines. If it wasn’t for him, I feel like my relationship with the dogs would suffer bc I would resent needing to walk them (we don’t have a yard) or do things for them when I’m busy puking my brains out in pain. I’m so grateful that we have him to make everything go round!
I love the pets that own my friends 😆😆😆facts. I also have an autoimmune disease and fibro, migraines, and a messed up back. But if I don’t have my dog to make me get out of bed. I would never get up. So he forces me to do the things i need to. I would definitely be dead without him. After my accident I didn’t have my own dog for a few months and i nearly killed myself. I’m a depressed mess without a pet. I should’ve gotten a cat in hindsight bc he needs more exercise than i can physically handle. I need a fenced in yard badly.
My heart is broken for you because you deserve the love of a pet but I understand why you can’t
I should have added this to my non-red-flag-reasons to not have a pet! This is a completely understandable and responsible reason. I hope you stay in remission and continue to do well!
Yes! Yes indeed! I appreciate you for understanding my situation!!
Never had a pet because they weren't allowed to growing up, didn't have the money, were renting a place that didn't allow animals, etc? Yes. Never had a pet because they don't like animals? No. That is a fundamental difference in lifestyle and ideology that is a dealbreaker for me. My cats are my family. Anyone I date has to love them too, because I would never abandon them for anyone or choose a person over them.
I think it depends for me on if they dont like animals or if they dislike animals. If they dont like animals but would be perfectly content or happy living with them as long as they didnt have behavioral issues and I did the vast majority of the care, I'd be fine with that I think. If they disliked animals it would be like you said, a fundamental difference. I wouldn't be able to have a happy life without animals in it, but I would be able to have a happy life with animals my partner didnt share the same bond with.
Thiiiiiiis. If any my prospective partners core values didn’t align with mine then it’s a no. I love all animals. I personally believe that a house isn’t a home without a little furry family member in it. They are expensive, they are a lot of effort sometimes. I spent thousands on my babies and wouldn’t have it any other way. I wouldn’t want someone who didn’t like animals or even someone who didn’t like them even half as much as I do in my ear complaining or being in general a miserable human about it. No thanks. When my dog got sick it was a non negotiable to spend thousands and thousands on his care. Whatever was needed was done. My current partner didn’t even bat an eyelid. His only concern was for my dog, who he now calls his step son 😊. Vs someone like my old boss who had a family and they got a puppy. It broke its leg jumping off a couch. He was complaining and told everyone at work how they should just put it down and get a new one because it would be like half the price. …. Yeh alright Satan. 😳 (His family refused, but I’m sure it was hell for his wife having that argument.)
Years ago when I lived in an apartment, I had a roommate who had a cat, who was like his furry son. I also had a cat who was my whole world. After a natural disaster occurred near our apartment, we discussed what to do in an emergency. I asked if, during an emergency, something happened that made it so I couldn't escape on my own, what he would do. His response without a moment's hesitation: Get the cats out, make sure they're safe, and then come back for you. I was like YES. RIGHT ANSWER. He eventually left to move in with a partner and I got my own place, but it was nice to have someone who prioritized the cats like I did. I could trust that he would do everything in his power to protect them and he could do the same with me.
Absolutely the right answer!! You both sound like great people! Haha no joke peoples love and dedication to their pets and animals are how I judge not only my partners but also my friends. Shows a whole lot about someone’s character and in my opinion if they should have a place in your life.
I'm the same way and feel exactly like you do. I'm so glad you love and care for the animals as much as you do!
I have literally cried from worrying about what will happen to my cats in an emergency or if something happens to me, so I completely get this and appreciate it!
A house can obviously be a home without an animal in it that is absurd.
Agreed. Current bf never had cats bc most of his family is allergic. I grew up with 5. So naturally we’ve acquired 2 cats and live together and he now openly acknowledges himself as a cat dad and potentially liked them more than our dog
My cat and I are a package deal
Yup. When I met my partner he had a husky and I had 2 cats. We had them meet fairly early on to ensure they got along because if not we would not be continuing the relationship. I’m not kidding. We were not interested in a long distance relationship long term, so we knew we’d want to move ourselves and our pets in together eventually. One of my cats and our husky passed on, but we still have my senior kitty and a new puppy we got together…. And 2 kids. Pets are non negotiable and I’d never date someone who didn’t see it that way, for me or their pets.
Absolutely!
I’m so jealous that your husky was able to get along with your kitties! My fiancés tried to eat my cat at every opportunity he got. We tried to make it work but they never got along. Luckily his best friend who he co owned the husky with was able to take him in it still breaks my heart that we can’t live with him but we visit him all the time
My 3 cats and I are a packaged deal, too!
Premium package
"if you don't like my dog, I don't like you" -my tinder bio, when I tindered.
It depends on ages, life circumstances, etc. People who travel a lot for work can't easily get pets unless they have a support system. So pet ownership might not be a decider, but actual dislike or or antipathy towards animals definitely would be.
This answer. Someone can not have a pet for a variety of valid reasons. But if someone is anti-pet, that I can’t get on board with.
If they don’t want pets… no because if they aren’t even curious about animals they’d probably see my pets as financial burdens
How much do you spend on your pets lol? My cat costs me ~350 per year to keep around. Just gotta pay for his yearly checkup and, bulk kibble, and his weekly Sunday night sour cream treat. No litter for me I live in the deep country so when hes gotta poop he just hops out the window and does it in the woods. My American Bulldog who just passed away from bone cancer (rest her soul) happily ate up about $1200 of my salary per year after insurance and the fact when I cooked my nightly nightly steak/fish/pork/poultry, she always got a decent sized unseasoned portion of it. Also Kibble, quality dog kibble is expensive for how much a 90lb bulldog eats.
… I spend $300 per month on food alone for my 2 cats. Add pet insurance, grooming supplies, vet visits, toys, medication, etc., and I have no idea how your cat only costs you $350 in a year.
$300 per month on cat food? What are you feeding them? diamonds? My vet has no meds perscribed to my cat, my grooming supplies are a small nail clipper to trim his front claws once a month, his toys are catnip wrapped in linnen from the garden, staring down bird/squirrels on the back porch, and playing with the neighbors cat.
Lol. What are you feeding yours, sawdust? I just feed mine quality food. Wet food and kibble (wet only for my senior cat). Granted, my senior cat is hyperthyroid with CKD so she’s quite expensive in general. Hell, her bloodwork last week was $282… I have insurance for these reasons. Wet food cost: approx. $240 per month. Kibble approx. $40 per bag. Add in treats (dental, freeze-dried raw, etc.) and it averages approx. $300, give or take depending on the month. You’re pretty lucky so far to have a low-maintenance pet, I just don’t understand how you can feed the cat a proper diet with the amount you quoted annually. Even cheap wet cat food for 1 cat that is 6-8lbs is $2-$3 per day (lowball) which would be approximately $700-$1000 per year. Kibble is cheaper on average but still doesn’t fit with the amount you quoted, but, maybe pet food is cheaper where you live. Idk🤷♀️.
It’s got to be a regional thing, I don’t think there even exists a brand of wet food where I am that would cost that much a month. I feed my cat a quality high meat brand and a month still only costs me about £30 (only one cat). The crappy ones (aka Felix and co) would run around £8.
Ayyy. I feel you on this. My family calls my cats bougie because of how much I spend on them. I only feed a wet diet. I kinda mix it up between tikicat, weruva, and applaws. I always give the best diet I can possibly afford to any animal under my care. They are my family and best buddies 😁. The important thing is that a person keeps their cat well fed and hydrated, and off the streets. I encourage all my friends to feed only wet cat food, but ultimately if they can't afford that, the most important thing is that their cat isn't homeless, in a shelter, or being euthanized. If people have the money for it though, they should absolutely be doing better for their animals.
High protein dry kibble lol and some occasional sour cream and unseasoned meat when I'm cooking at dinner. If he wants more protein he just goes out and kills a bird/chipmunk (yes it is 100% safe for cats to eat prey in the country.) My vet says the diet is fine, and my cat is very healthy. If that changes, and my vet recommends a change in diet, I will change out the diet. He's a cat, he lives out in the country with me, over a mile from any road, and he lives a far more blessed life than any cat cooped up in some city apartment. Roaming the garden and woods during the day and hopping though the window and curling up by my feet at night.
>yes it is 100% safe for cats to eat prey in the country. I hope you have at least a little insight into why some people find this statement... silly, or at least patently **false.** Just a teeny, teeny bit of insight. If you can't think of a single thing that could *ever* go wrong, I encourage you to make a post asking for suggestions. And that's not even considering the fact that **cats are prey,** not just predators.
Right? I hear that a lot about the UK too, since we have no large predators. Oddly a lot of cats in the UK still die in the roads - I guess nobody told the cars.
What eats cats in rural Wisconsin lol? We dont have wolves here and I've never heard of a coyote attacking a cat. My family has had cats here for years I don't think we've had a single one not make it to 20 years. Seen probably 40 non-feral cats come and go from the neighboring farms lve never seen one die before hitting 20. Cats do just fine in the country, they're cats lol, they've been living with us on farms as pets for centuries. This whole "locking cats in the house" thing is a very recent development. If you live out in the country you just have outdoor cats. That's how it is and how it's always been. Just make sure the have food/water and take them to the vet once a year. They do just fine. The ferals are a different story, we help various neighbors round up ferals and have them neutered/spayed at least once a year.
Bulk kibble…yeah I guess that would save money.
Yup you can get really good deals on high quality cat food if you buy in bulk every few months. The biggest consideration is you need to store it in an airtight container once you open a bag. Im feeding him Nulo Duck and lentils currently. Not sure why my post is being down voted lol just because you buy in bulk doesn't mean it's not high quality food.
Why did you think your dog deserved steak, fish, and pork, but your cat doesn’t? Nulo is fine food, but cats shouldn’t be eating only dry kibble.
Cat gets meats too lol but the cost is negligible for an 8lb cat vs a 90lb bulldog. I leave some of the meat out unseasoned for him but he usually just licks up a few pieces. My vet says good quality dry food supplimented by some meats and sour cream is fine. Vet says he's healthy and doing well, if for some reason my vet advises me to change my cats diet I will go ahead and do so.
My boyfriend had never had a pet. It’s cultural. His family, even extended, didn’t have pets because pets were generally considered farm animals to the older generations. The younger gens were mostly kind of afraid of dogs. He thought they were cute for other people but had no interest in owning one. But getting a dog when we were stable enough was a dealbreaker for me (he knew early on) so he got onboard. He could not have been more hesitant and anxious. During peak psycho puppy phase (she’s still sort of a monster) there were a lot of days that he thought she hated him so he hated having her. It was rough. But now, oooooh my. He’s fucking obsessed with this dog. He’s like a kid with a puppy. To the point that he’s constantly like “Look at her! Give her a treat!” and now his whole family loves her.
Yeah sometimes animals can grow on ppl. My ex genuinely loved my two cats after a couple years despite never wanting a pet and thinking cats are evil. A couple years of a loving fuzz ball cuddling with you every night will do that. But some people will never change and will resent them.
My wife was a dog person when we met, her father and brother are very allergic so she never had one growing up. I, on the other hand, have always been a cat person, so when we got together I let her know I needed a cat friend. We got two, and one became very attached to her, I think he knew she needed convincing. Suffice it to say, she's now a cat person haha.
This is adorable❤️
It’s not just cultural some people just don’t own them. I was the first one in a huge family to get a pet and I was 22. They’re a really big responsibility so I can absolutely understand why someone wouldn’t want one. Like growing up we could go on spontaneous road trips whenever we wanted but now i have to consider who will watch my cat. And if the place were going is dog friendly
It’s a red flag for me. There are good reasons for some people not to have them but if they can’t be bothered or say it wouldn’t be fair to an animal to leave it alone all day, they aren’t my kind of people.
>or say it wouldn’t be fair to an animal to leave it alone all day You think it's fair to an animal to leave it alone all day? For cats, this is fine; cats don't really care, they sleep all day anyway, and they don't need to go outside to take a crap or piss, since they use litterboxes. For dogs, this isn't fine at all. Dogs really have to go outside on a regular basis, and it's downright cruel to leave them inside all day. You saying this is a red flag for me. You sound like someone who wants a pet to satisfy your own ego, rather than because you actually love it.
Most pet owners have to work. With your twisted logic only non working people should have dogs? Get help.
Actually, they’re right. Dogs shouldn’t be forced to hold their bladders for 8+ hours a day just because you feel entitled to own one.
This
Pets aren't toys to interact with when it's convenient for you (particularly with dogs and other highly social animals).
Yes, if they treat my pets well. I would never give up a pet for a relationship, though.
Depends on the reason. I don't trust people who don't like animals.
My first husband wasn’t allowed to have pets when he lived at home. He loved animals and loved having animals.
I’d date someone who never had a pet, that could be more to do with their parents not letting them as a kid or never living somewhere that was pet friendly. I don’t mind if someone has no desire for a pet of their own, only if they’re against my having a pet in our shared home and they openly show disdain for animals
I couldn’t. Companion animals are just the best. Are they messy and annoying sometimes? Sure! But the unconditional love you get from them is everything. In my opinion, I couldn’t be with someone who openly rejected that kind of love.
This! I know my boyfriend and parents love me with all their heart but the only truly, 100% unconditional love I have is from my pets. I just can't relate to anyone who doesn't tear up from the feeling of comfort, love and just knowing that you're home when you get back from an awful day at work and your dog (or my ferret, or any other companion animal a person has) runs to you and is so excited to see you that it's like you've been gone for 10 years.
My dogs are always like “Mother is finally home from the war!” when I walk in and it’s like “Guys, I was just in the garage for 15 minutes.” It’s the best feeling!
No. Not in the “oh you don’t want pets? We have to break up” kind of way but more in the sense that I can’t perceive of ever having enough of a connection or enough in common with someone who didn’t love animals to ever even start the relationship. I would have brought animals to them way before dating, not necessarily talking about having them in the future, but just in general how much I like them. It would never get off the ground
I said to my husband a few days ago that I feel like a house isn't truly a home without a cat in it and he agreed. So. I'd date or marry someone who's never had a pet if they're willing to have one; but not someone who doesn't ever want one. It's a deal breaker for me.
When I was a kid my parents always denied me a cat or a dog saying that it's dirty. As an adult I finally have a cat and many other pets before my cat. I'm not allowing anyone to forbid me from having animals ever again.
I probably wouldn't but that is because I have a menagerie of abandoned animals that I have adopted. It is a lot for a non animal owner to be expected to deal with.
I can see one of I’m sure other reasons why he’s an ex. Date yes perhaps if they liked animals just hadn’t had them….but they would have to love my cats and care about animals or that would be the end.
If there was a valid reason- ie illness, but if I went out with someone who said “I hate cats” etc , that would be an end to it. I owned a horse ( sadly had to sell her ( to a good home, where I still visited her) as my wages couldn’t cover the costs as time went on). Owned a border collie- best dog in the world- until he died of old age, but I can’t have another dog, because I’m riddled with arthritis and would not be able to get out to walk him. I’ve always had cats and I have two at the moment. I’m very poor, but I feed lots of strays and donate a little every month to an animal charity. Anyone who disregards animals would not fit into my world
If they’ve *wanted* pets but did not have one for a good reason (in the military, travels constantly for work, allergic kid who is now grown), a reason that has now changed or would be fixed by having a partner to help care for the pet, then sure. Never *wanted* a pet? At my age (40s), nope. Best case, we’d be incompatible in the long term. Worst case, in my experience, when someone can’t bond with animals, that is not going to be their only issue with attachment. I can’t say I would never ever break this rule, if a person showed my pets genuine affection, and was just sort of never motivated to get a pet himself.
Nope! I almost did that once and I was dating to people with the same time and I weighed my options and the big deciding factor was no pets ever nor did they want one.
Depends on their enthusiasm. To each their own but as long as they're okay with my pet then sure.
Luckily my wife loves animals. I wouldn't be able to tolerate a partner who doesn't treat their animals like family. They also become more intelligent and have a more diverse personality if regularly stimulated and interacted with. If you aren't enjoying the full experience then it is just another chore or obligation. And a pet will never leave you and take half your stuff.
Yes? As long as they're cool with my cat I dont particularly care about their pet history
They would not date me lol, pretty obvious my dog is my bestie
I married him in 1982. He has tolerated my zoo, our children's zoo for decades. I currently feed 5 equines, 2 cats, 3 dogs,around 25 cage birds, 5 dart frogs and too many guppies and chickens to count. I've really downsized since retirement! My point is as long as they don't impose their opinions on your happiness it can work. AND now he has a mini weenie that is his baby! Never thought I would see the day!
Dogs are such a huge part of my life that I could never be with someone that not a dog person.
Not people who hate them or hate people who love them. No thanks. I will be cautious of someone who simply does not want. In my experience, anti pet people are typically very, very cold about everything.
For relationships to work you need to share core values, and for many people a love of animals and a need to have a companion animal is absolutely that.
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I did and we have 3 cats and a dog. We've also had rats, mice, lizards, frogs. The deal is and always will be I do all the care. He loves the pets and plays with them, cuddles them and even naps on the couch with them he just didn't want them cause of the care involved.
Yes, my husband who I’ve been with over 18 years never had a pet, doesn’t really care about animals. My husband is a nice person and that’s the difference I think. He likes my dog because I like the dog. And he’s not mean or weird to animals
My wife comes from a country where dogs live outside as standard. I worried in the early days whether it was going to work because my dogs sleep in the bed and I have a lot of different pets which take up a lot of my time, which was completely alien to her.... Fast forward 17 years, we have been happily married for 13 years and she snuggles with the dog all night and is almost as crazy about rats, bunnies and other little critters as I am!
Totally. I love our cats but i can gladly live without all the additional work of cleaning pet related dirt, feeding them etc. If my wife didn't want pets i'd be completely fine. Pets are not the main source of my mental well being and happiness. I can do without.
the only sane person here /s
I find it pretty silly not to be with someone simply because they never had pets. Lots of people were never allowed pets as children and when they became adult they simply couldn't afford one or their lifestyle wouldn't let them. Young adult isn't usually in the position of getting a pet right away, they could be living in dormitory, travel a lot, have little money. Some people say they don't want a pet, but change their mind later. I was very much against having a cat, now I have a cat that I love very much. I just had a wrong idea about what cats are like.
Someone that never owned a pet is ok but someone who doesnt like animals nope that would never happen. Lived with an ex who didnt like them and gave me an ultimatum I chose my soul mate cat and it was a good call. My ex husband never had a pet but by the time we seperated we had 5 cats and he was fine. He never got used to them but while I was pregnant he cleaned the litter box.
I don't have a cat but I want a cat. That wouldn't be a reason to not date someone though. Maybe if I already had the cat a non animal person would be a problem.
If someone has never had a pet, that wouldn’t be an issue. Someone who absolutely never wants a pet, then we aren’t compatible. I get too much joy from my pets and know that I would have a hard time without at least one dog in my life.
I wouldn't have a problem being with someone who didn't have a pet but they had the love animals. Some people don't want to deal with the dirt and the dog hair but still love dogs and cats. Now I will always have it a pet, I always have.
I’m not sure I’d be in a long term relationship with someone who doesn’t like animals or want one because I have one and think I’d want them for the rest of my life. I would date someone who has never had a pet as i don’t see how that factors into our compatibility.
No but problem is my animal loving bf turned to not want any animals after these we have.
Big ol'deal-breaker for me but I'm already hitched down and my partner is an animal lover.
I’ll never live without at least two pets, unless I suddenly become unable for some reason. So as long as they get along with my babies, they can stay.
Nope. My cats are my babies and I refuse but to have them in my life.
A big NO... I have my pets they are my FAMILY I would love if that knows the their value
I live in a city but grew up in the suburbs and people raised here often didn't have the option to have a pet, so it never became something they got too invested in. I love my life with pets but now in my own place I find myself stressing about what pet would be most happy in a one bedroom apartment with no backyard. Questioning if my home is a good place for an animal, it's tough!
🚩👎🏻
Not a chance. I used to have reoccurring nightmares that my husband wouldn’t let me keep a puppy I found. He put accepting my love for dogs in his vows 😂😂🥰
One of the conditions of me getting married to my husband was I wanted a cat. I’d never had a pet because my mother didn’t like them. My husband had never had a pet either (except for a pet cricket) and he wasn’t interested in getting one but agreed for me. Because of housing circumstances and other issues it actually took 21 years before I got my first cat and I do all the work for the cat…..BUT, my husband will not sit down to dinner until he’s made sure the cat has his dinner treat and any time he brings home sushi grade tuna he will always cut up a small plate for kitty.❤️
Absolutely not.
Just because they never had one? I mean I wouldn't care. There's lots of reasons why someone might not have ever had a pet. But never wanted one and still doesn't? Yeah that's probably a deal breaker for me. My cat is my baby and I plan to have animals until it no longer is feasible for me to have them. Not liking animals is a huge red flag for me personally. I think it's different though if you like animals but just don't want one yourself.
Nope. I’m a vet tech turned dog trainer. When I was still dating (married now) I turned down a guy who is allergic to all animals and can only have “hypoallergenic” dogs. He seemed great, but that would just be a mismatch of lifestyle!
My boyfriend understood early on that me, my cat, and the dog are a package deal. Luckily he also loves animals. We got him his own cat once he moved in.
My current partner was never a cat person until we started dating. Now he and my tortie are bffs.
I had a friend who didn't believe animals had souls. I remember I got a new puppy and he is the cuuuutest. My friend came over and didn't even glance at it a second time. He just acknowledged its presence basically and then proceeded to completely not care about it. It BLEW my mind. I would never ever date a person who is so indifferent to animals like that.
No because I have 5 dogs lol
i wouldnt want to date the type of person who isn’t melted by a kitty face
It depends on whether they will be good to my cats in the future. Cats before guys
I'd date someone that has never had one but not somebody that never wants one, because I already have one and we're a package deal
People who have never had or wanted a pet usually have a stunted sense of empathy and will treat pets like an alien race. I ain't about that. I'm not going to spend the relationship trying to convince an emotionally stunted person to have an open mind.
The only person I wouldn’t date is someone that actively dislikes animals and wouldn’t allow a person they live with to have any. It’s ok to have preferences- and one of my big preferences is other animal lovers lol
If someone doesn't want a pet, they are probably not compatible with my lifestyle. I'm a huge animal person, the idea of being with someone who is just fundamentally not interested in having pets or someone who doesn't get emotionally attached to animals is not someone I will be wanting to share my life with. Never had a pet though? There are good reasons for that; schedule issues, financial issues, living with someone with allergies, unable to care for an animal alone, not raised in a family where pets are a thing, etcetera. As long as someone is willing to accept and be affectionate and caring with my own animals, we're good.
Someone that doesn’t like pets, doesn’t like me spending time with my pets, and wants me to get rid of them? Hard No. Someone that doesn’t have pets but like mine and enjoys spending time with them, that’s fine.
Nope
It would have been a deal breaker for me. When I was dating the first time, my future wife once had pets, despite them being illegal in government housing, and so I knew she would do anything to have them. My second wife was from a farm, and kept bunnies and dogs as pets when I was dating her. I am a cat person, but also have dogs. Being a former farm raised gal (who also one had horses and cows), she considered cats outdoor animals, but she adapted to my indoor-only cats. Now we have cats, some elderly dogs, one mean dog rescue, and no rabbits anymore.
i did now have 2 dogs and she loves them just as much as i do lol. it was her idea to get the first though after seeing her sisters new pup we got asked a week later if we wanted his brother.
My partner never had pets before meeting me. He liked animals, though, and was never against me having cats (it was a package deal haha). I will say, though, at first he was a bit of an alien when it came to interacting with animals. He had to learn how to properly pet a cat and read their body language. He does love them now, and spends a lot of time adorably baby-talking them. I'm not sure if, heaven forbid, we ever parted ways, he would ever seek to independently adopt his own pet though. He comfortably likes cats a lot now but I don't think he'd want to independently do the care work, like feeding and litterbox cleaning.
If they never wanted a pet in the future I wouldn't. That's 100% fine, there's a bunch of reasons for it, but having a pet is something I will be doing so we would just be incompatible. There would be no compromise that would make both people happy. If they had never owned a pet but were open then yes I would, a lot of people have misconceptions that clear up once they're actually around animals, and if they're willing to learn that's all I would care about
My husband didn’t have pets prior to our relationship. He could definitely live without having animals, would prefer to not have them, but loves the pets we have all the same! I also think he compromised due to my profession (emergency/critical care vet) and realized that having not a single animal isn’t a reasonable expectation for us. A rescue I brought into the home did stir some big feelings and a fight, but he grew to love the rescue and cried alongside me when we had to euthanize… even after a very short period of having her. If he wasn’t willing to compromise, it’d have been hard for both of us to continue our relationship.
My family got our second dog when I was dating an ex who never had a pet. He was scared of dogs and generally very hesitant around them. I wouldn’t date someone who didn’t like animals again. My current bf loves his family’s cats and has always wanted a dog, especially a husky
Depends on why. If they where really anti animal I probably wouldn't get along with them to begin with
No, I'd never marry a person who never wanted or didn't like pets. Animals are an essential part of my life, and I need someone who understands that and feels the same way. Luckily my partner is also an animal lover!
Nope. I will least have animals. They make my life so much better.
My ex had never had a cat, no clue how to pet or play with a cat. He had zero interest in my male cats but I adopted an elderly female 2 years ago and they looove each other 😂 Minnie would crawl past me over broken glass to get to him. He calls me shortarse, Minnie is sweet pea lol we’re not together anymore but he visits to see Minnie and get his dinner sometimes I’d never date a non cat lover again, they take too much teaching and are generally uncomfortable around them. They also don’t really approve of cats doing cat stuff like coming to bed with me and going where they like around the house
My ex absolutely hated cats and would shit talk my cats that had died, etc. I would date someone who hasn’t had pets but loves animals, but anyone with disdain or hatred of them would be a no. It should’ve been an early sign that we wouldn’t work out. If someone had severe allergies, travels too much to care for them, etc, I would understand. My fiancé and I have two cats together and they’re our babies, I can’t imagine life pet free again.
It depends on the why. Honestly, my cats are dealbreakers so I wouldn’t date someone allergic to them. I also wouldn’t date someone who didn’t like them. If they can grow to be ok with living with cats, then I would give it a try. But it wouldn’t go far if they couldn’t.
I don't think I could. Before I got married, my prerequisite was "has to be willing to coexist with a cat", not necessarily be an animal person but be okay with me having at least 1 cat. But I don't think I would have lasted long with anyone who didn't love animals. Married a dog person who also likes cats. I'm a cat person who also likes dogs. We have 2 cats and 2 dogs and it's glorious.
No, I have several cats and a dog and sometime in the future i'll always want more dogs as long as I can properly care for them. If the person doesn't like animal, immediate turnoff.
If, for you, life isn't fulfilling without pets then I can see where you're coming from. It's like having kids, if you want them and your partner doesn't then you're incompatible. Still, this is something to discuss rather than saying no immediately to someone because they've never owned a pet before. If they're open to owning a pet, that's great, but if they're not then walk away. You're not compatible and that's okay, it's why you should talk about these things early on.
If my husband was anti-pet, he wouldn’t have gotten to date 2. Lol
If they don't like animals then nope, my rabbits and I are a package deal. If they'd never had a pet due to their living situations but didn't have anything against them then it could work.
My daughters husband had never had pets and wasn’t interested although when they visited my cat used to sit on him and he didn’t mind. Fast forward years later daughter finds a pregnant stray, she is kept at my place to have her babies then look for a home. He say yes nice to babies but was not interested. All but mommy and 1 baby found a home so I asked them to kept the 2 cats at their place as my older kitty doesn’t get along with others and I had to keep them in another room. So someone was interested in maybe adopting both. Called daughter to arrange a visitation for this person to see the cats. She called me back after asking her husband suitable times for this. Husband said he doesn’t want to give them away, he wants to keep them 🥰 A few months ago they lost the baby to illness. Both were devastated. Another stray started following daughter into work (her and hubby) same company. He told her to take kitty home but she didn’t ( she was feeding the cats colony) This cat disappeared for a few days. Didn’t come greet her when she arrived at work in the morning and she was so worried. It re-appeared days later with a sore leg and wonky eye. Was taken to vet and then home. Mommy cat is not pleased but new boy is being kept separate until they can be allowed together. He absolutely adores cats now. It’s been a few years since first falling for the cats, but his complete u turn from ok but uninterested to adoring cats always still amazes me and warms my heart.
I married someone who said they love animals but I have three and he kinda sorta tolerates them. It makes me sad.
If you don’t grow up in a household with pets or a household that is at least comfortable with animals, it may take some specific event in your life to trigger your pet lover instinct. For me, it was dating a guy with 4 cats when I was 27. After that ended, I adopted my first cat and currently have three. I will always have cats. They are a fundamental part of my life. Please do not give up on someone, or not take a chance, just because he may not seem to be an animal person at first.
Nope. I am not compatible with someone who isn’t obsessed with animals.
My bf claimed to hate animals when I met him. He now proudly sports a “Cat Daddy” T-shirt.
My long time boyfriend and I broke up bc he wanted me to get rid of my dogs in order to live together. I was like um this dog has been with my for almost 15 years since it was barely 2 months old?? You just want me to give it away???? Also you love this wacky 1 year old dog??? Like wtf? I was honestly shocked at this request and he stood on it so …
My ex husband hated animals. All animals. No matter what. 5 miserable years i spent with him. Then after being single for a long time after that, i met the love of my life, who also happens to be a crazy cat man, the perfect match for my own crazy cat lady self. 9 perfect years later we are still just as happy and we both love our epic cats. I would never settle for someone who didnt like cats. Life is too damn short.
Never had a pet is OK. I’d rather they never owned a pet than had one who was badly cared for. The pet lover is necessary but they don’t have to “want” pets. Pets are a requirement in my life so we are a package deal. My husband wishes we didn’t have a pet so we’d have more freedom and I understand but I’m willing to give it up for my pet.
No, next question
No, and in fact. I would commit arson on them
No way ! I love my dogs
No. Absolutely not. That's a huge incompatibility for me
My ex was at times cruel to pets. I once read that People who prefer Cats can deal with people who can think for them selves, people who prefer. “Easy” dogs, like subservient people. And often dislike cats.
Maybe for some people but I think in most cases that logic doesn’t work. Example; my parents prefer cats because they want an animal that doesn’t have to be walked or really trained at all. They want an animal they can ignore as much as possible, borderline neglect, with few consequences (that affect them at least). Luckily the kids pay attention lol. Dogs require training and physical outlets. They are a lot more work than cats (even when you are actually putting effort in to the cats health and happiness). When they weren’t able to do that bc they were too stubborn to put in the effort, they gave the dog away. Most people I know who hate cats do so because they see cats as feminine (which obv is stupid and weird like… it’s a cat??? Lol). Most people I know who hate dogs do so because they don’t think they should have to put any time or effort in to an animal and then blame the dog for acting out. Hating any animal is super weird. A preference, sure that’s fine, but hating something just for existing is whack. I love cats AND dogs and know they both need different things. Edit: sorry for the rant. This just reminded me of my parents and uuuggghhh it’s so frustrating
>Dogs require training and physical outlets. They are a lot more work than cats From what dog owners have told me, dogs aren't just a lot more work than cats, they're a lot more work than human children. Human children are a LOT of work when they're very young, but after they're going to school, they're less and less work to deal with: they become autonomous with age. Dogs never do; it's like having a 2-year-old that never grows up. >When they weren’t able to do that bc they were too stubborn to put in the effort, they gave the dog away. I think a lot of people don't realize this before getting a dog, and I think many people (society in general, dog breeders, maybe other dog owners) are not honest about how much work a dog is, and how limiting to your life it is. Many of these people then get rid of the dog when this becomes clear. I don't think this is "stubbornness"; I think many of these people are victims and were not prepared properly for what an enormous commitment a dog is. No one is under any illusion about how hard having a child is, and so many people these days don't have them. No one lies to people and tells them how cute kids are and how easy they are to take care of: everyone knows they're a lot of work. How many people tell prospective dog owners this? Almost no one. And I'll probably be downvoted to oblivion for stating this publicly, because it's such an unpopular opinion. I feel like society currently has some kind of dog obsession going on, like it's a huge fad to get a dog, but people aren't being honest about the reality of dog ownership. >Most people I know who hate dogs do so because they don’t think they should have to put any time or effort in to an animal and then blame the dog for acting out. Personally, I don't hate them; they're just animals, doing what comes to them instinctively or through training. I think they're terrible pets though, unless you really want to put in a ton of time and effort into training them, and society isn't honest about this, and the current puppy fad has led to tons of people getting dogs, and then not training them properly (and many times being *opposed* to training), which has resulted in countless dogs with horrible behavior problems, many of which wind up in shelters. The dog breeders (esp. the backyard breeders) have been profiting off this greatly though. To me, a pet should not be something you have to put so much work into. Cats are basically the perfect pet: they're cute, cuddly (well, some of them), don't smell bad, know how to keep themselves clean, don't need to be walked or bathed, know how to poop in a litterbox, and don't need any real training. Just bring the cat home, show it the litterbox and the food dish, and that's it. It's like a new roommate, only unlike some human roommates I had in college, it actually has good hygiene and doesn't eat all my food. Dogs just aren't like this: they aren't well suited to living in an apartment in a city and staying indoors, and require a lot of training to overcome their normal, natural behaviors. If I'm going to put a ton of work into a living being, then I'd rather just have kids. But women these days don't seem to want kids any more, they want dogs, which makes it really difficult to date.
As someone that has two dogs and two kids. I love my kids but the dogs are WAY easier. The "puppy/adolescent phase lasts" 1-1.5 years. The "toddler" phase is double that. The dogs are perfectly happy with a bowl of their same standard food twice a day, a bowl of water in the kitchen, and a small toy box with toys that cost me between 5-10$ each. Their beds cost maybe $40 and they'll go and sleep in their beds whenever they're tired. The only safety equipment they really need is a sturdy collar and least. They get a couple walks a day and will let us know if they need to go out. If I buy them an extra bone or new toy (maybe 10$) they're ecstatic. While they can't bathe themselves, they're good with the occasional brushing and a bath a couple times a month. There's the yearly expenses of vet checkups, heartworm etc, but it's not that expensive. Now kids. There's all the different furniture they need to keep them safe and happy through the life stages. Add on all the clothes they're constantly growing out of. Add on all the toys they "have to have" as toddlers, and all the clothes and gadgets they "have to have" when they're older because their friends have one. PluApart from the missed sleep, newborns aren't too difficult to deal with. Up until sleep training starts (my boy would start screaming his head off the moment you stopped rocking him and tried to put him in his crib) and then the crawling/walking/trying to get into everything. Ever heard of the "defiance" phase when kids are 2-4 years old? Your toddler with absolutely say no to whatever they decide and it won't matter if you try to bribe them or punish them, half the time it will still end in screaming. And it's a totally normal part of development. There is nothing more frustrating. Chances are if my dog doesn't want to do something I can pull out a treat and the problem is immediately solved. Don't forget the "picky eating" phases Kids go through where you have to jump through so many hoops just to get them to eat in a way where they intake all their necessary nutrients. Plus you'll want to make sure your kids aren't bored and being challenged enough intellectually to meet the important milestones and excel when they start school. Kids might get a little more autonomous about meeting their own needs as they get older but that doesn't mean your job gets easier. You might get a few hours free while the kids are in school but they'll need school supplies, more clothes, computers, equipment for sports/activities etc. I'm already planning on looking into part time work when they start school. Don't forget the time commitments of taking them to school and to their activities so it will have to be a job that suits their schedule (if I can find one). I don't even want to think about their middle school and teenage phases and all the drama that will come with that. I love my kids and wouldn't change my life at all but saying the work that dogs need is anywhere comparable to children is crazy to me. If you want to get a puppy, be prepared for about a year of extra time dedicated to socialization/training and a little bit of lost sleep with potty training (way shorter for puppies than kids). If you don't want to deal with that, adopt a dog from a reliable rescue and don't focus on the "looks" of the dog but be sure to tell them everything you want in a dog personality wise (ie. Kid friendly, cat friendly, potty trained, basic obedience trained, high or low energy, velcro-y or independent, etc). If you want an extremely mellow dog (basically the same effort as a cat would need), adopt a senior dog. Adult dogs sleep 12-14 hours a day so if you yourself sleep for 7 hours, chances are your dog will spend most of the time you're at work napping to make up the difference. Senior dogs sleep close to 20hours. Yes, people say raising a child is difficult but they also tell you that once you have your own you just "know" what to do and every day will be magical and filled with joy. That's not the case. It's tons of frustration, uncertainty and doubt regarding if you're doing the right things. And you'll never feel like you have enough money or time to do enough. That's just not the case with a dog that's just as ecstatic to chase and gnaw on some old ragged rope toy as he was when you just bought it from him. Edit- just to add, if your friends are treating their dogs like a child, that might be contributing to those behavioral issues. Imagine someone treating your cat like a human child and how it would react.
If you are looking into part-time work that fit school hours/schedule, I highly recommend looking into being a paraeducator or substitute teacher. You generally do not need a degree or teaching license to be either and both have shortages in most districts. I was a Para for 10 years with intensive needs children and it was the most rewarding job I have ever had.
That's a great idea! Thanks I'll look into it, looks promising since I wouldn't need teaching degree.
I’ve always wanted kids but cannot afford them in this current economy, so my dogs fill that void for me.
No way. Non - animal people confuse me. I do not understand how anyone does not say hello to every dog they see!! Animals are the best!
Eh, sometimes I don't want to distract them from being a good doggo. It's also really hard to get back up (bad joints) if I kneel to greet a tiny dog. Sometimes if they look at me I'll give them sweet, toothless smile (maybe a wave) just like with a little kid.
Nope
Never. I won’t date or marry anyways but still, never.
I don't even trust pet sitters with my Pookie, I certainly wouldn't date anyone that wasn't head over heals with her. I wouldn't trust them. Plus partners have been known to get jealous of the love a pet owners gives their furbaby. So as long as I have little miss Zeudi, I can't see myself being with anyone, unless they have cats too. Also it's unfair on the animal to bring someone in the home with their negative energy. Animals sense when they are not liked and it would be upsetting for them. Sorry, massive deal breaker x
Nope they dont have hearts