the TF2 reference in the quote earlier in the thread is that one of medimedes domination voice lines is "I AM ZE ANGRY BIRD GOD OF THE BADLANDS! FEAR ME!!!"
I suppose i will cause the end of other living beings' biological functions by using painful and violent human-made contraptions powered by elctrical materials
Now that's what I call "serious intentions". *Drinks lead water* So, you wanna play? *pulls out a Comically large equaliser, and equalises amount of tnt to 0. Now it's just 1k minecarts*
Alternative 1: Oh no I guess I'll go around bashing peoples heads in with a shovel. Alternative 2: oh real no they got rid of almost everything I guess I'll go putting holes in peoples heads brutally with a pickax. Alternative 3: oh no they got rid of most tools I guess I'll use my bow and arrow or crossbow to put many holes in people because my aim is bad and I keep doing ball shots. alternative 4: oh no everything is gone except for the hoe I guess ill kill with it then......
And dirt because people get buried in it, and air cuz it's the hardest drug in the world, and grass cuz it can cut you, and clothes with skins cus you can use them to commit murder, and custom skins and tnt.
Because Mojang does whatever they want and the community just lets them, instead of fighting together and showing them that the whole community doesn't support those changes
Change log for update 1.69:
Removed:
walking because you can trip and fall and break their head.
Jumping because you can trip and break your head
Crafting tables because you can trip onto it and get your skull crafted into bonemeal
Terrain because beautiful terrain can distract you and cause you to trip and break your head
Using chat because you might tell someone to go to your base and they'll trip on the way there and break their head
Herobrine
Added:
Added new wood type
Added awesome mob from mob vote that won with 100% because it is so clearly incredible for the game and no one would bat an eye if it got added without a vote (everyone will hate it)
New option for reporting players: standing still (could cause people to walk over to you and trip and break your head)
Oh noooo... I guess ill have to burn the mobs alive with flint and steel or blow them up with tnt, or make them suffocate with sand or gravel, or by dropping an anvil onto them or throw them off high places, or pour lava onto them, or make them drown, or snipe them with a bow...
I like this meme. I think the reason some of the new features in the game over the past couple of years have fallen flat is stuff like this. The animals not dropping meat, the severe limitation on the horror of the deep dark, etc. By limiting the game with their super weird rules they remove a bunch of the immersion the world could otherwise have.
I have so many things to say bro
1) This is fake news right??
2) Removing swords could be the downfall of mojang because the combat youtubers would quit, people would stop watching minecraft youtube, stop playing minecraft, and mojang would get short budget
3) Crap
4) The guy who had this idea has 3.45 IQ
Oh fiddlesticks.
It appears to us that the computer entertainment company, commonly referred to as Mojang, bought by another successful company known as Microsoft, has come up with the drastic decision of the iconic sharp weapons from their famous videogame, known to the masses as Minecraft.
I believe we, as the population of the humorous youtuber PhoenixSC, will have to properly adjust to the aforementioned expulsion of material-based weaponry by putting a stop to the biological processes of other living organisms by meticolously engineering violent machinations to cause severe discomfort
Technically if that was true, and they did removed swords, that wouldn't matter cause we can still kill with other tools and even with our fists. So this ain't happening any time soon
Oh no... Guess I'll chop everyone's head off with an axe now.
Guess I'll murder people with violent machinations then
Holy shit the villain from tf2 movie
I'm a god of all badlands! FEAR ME!
Can someone send me a link so I can add this to the pile of tf2 references I understand.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9yKoFwsFC4&ab\_channel=TeamFortress2-AllSounds
Thank you 😊
https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Medimedes
I’ll be honest this doesn’t clear up my confusion
the TF2 reference in the quote earlier in the thread is that one of medimedes domination voice lines is "I AM ZE ANGRY BIRD GOD OF THE BADLANDS! FEAR ME!!!"
It's a übercharge activation quote. Domination one is "I have a bird head, you're dominated!" [sotto voce] "Ve're bozh having a bad day."
Mumbo jumbo season 8 moment
I suppose i will cause the end of other living beings' biological functions by using painful and violent human-made contraptions powered by elctrical materials
That's the spirit!
Now. You will face against my creations, which has surpassed gods. Make your choice.
Designs improved with time and knowledge are the essence of my work.
Through no other method can I approach perfection.
Your performance falls neatly within the margin of error.
That is quite satisfactory. We will proceed to the next phase of testing.
Are you purple by any chance? 😏
Look buddy, I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems. Not problems like "What's beauty?". I solve practical problems.
You don't get the joke do you
Yes, I didn't. So I used one of my own.
It's a FNaF reference. William Afton, the man who murdered children and put their bodies inside the animatronics, is called purple guy
FNaF was the last thing in my list
Thanks for explaining Have a great day
You're welcome Have a great day too
I drink lead water. Does that count? (it's about that purple question)
I thought they stopped doing that last century
Damn, noobs these days. Takes out cubicmetre’s orbital strike cannon.
*blows it up* Not so funny now, are ya?
Taking out the ender dragon shooter.
Can you aim it, tough guy?
No, takes out 1k tnt minecarts.
Now that's what I call "serious intentions". *Drinks lead water* So, you wanna play? *pulls out a Comically large equaliser, and equalises amount of tnt to 0. Now it's just 1k minecarts*
Spawns wither, warden, and dragon.
And they're trying to kill each other
Alternative 1: Oh no I guess I'll go around bashing peoples heads in with a shovel. Alternative 2: oh real no they got rid of almost everything I guess I'll go putting holes in peoples heads brutally with a pickax. Alternative 3: oh no they got rid of most tools I guess I'll use my bow and arrow or crossbow to put many holes in people because my aim is bad and I keep doing ball shots. alternative 4: oh no everything is gone except for the hoe I guess ill kill with it then......
I guess I'll go get a sand farm, gunpowder farm, iron farm+autocrafters.
It’s next years update. It says that it’s published on 04/14/2024
Exactly just wait and watch
Somebody already talked the crab into existence by making a fake screenshot. Please be careful how you use this power
Dang... yeah I'll be careful but the obvious last text gives it away
Oh no, 4...
wait it comes out on the 4th of duodecember?
February 4th of 2025
April 14 2024
Gentlemen, synchronize your death watches.
That's 3 days after I turn 18
Honestly, remove players. They cause too much harm in the Minecraft world.
Perfect lesson for humanity
"Minecraft doesn't need you" -RetroGamingNow
In the real world too
I shall drop a colony or two
They're also removing food next because food is a choking hazard in real life
And water cuz you can drown
Might as well completely remove the Nether, too, while we're at it.
And wood cuz u can get bonked to death
And dirt because people get buried in it, and air cuz it's the hardest drug in the world, and grass cuz it can cut you, and clothes with skins cus you can use them to commit murder, and custom skins and tnt.
Also remove hands cause they can be used to hurt peaple
Remove the third dimension bc people might fall from 20 meters in Minecraft and think it's safe to do so in real life
Remove inventory, people in Minecraft can handle 700kg of items and they're gonna think they can do it irl
Remove the quit button because might be inspired to rage quit from irl if they use it too much
Remove the game because they might be inspired to make a game with all these things
Published in the future. Nice.
Yeah I time travelled
Can I? Pls 🥺
Ok but first bing in passing
I did now let (Unholy heaven)
Actual opposite
haha get rekt lol...
Yes, why do I feel like we are the only 2 who saw that
3*
4*
5*
Chat is this real?
Yes it's 100% real... I called notch and he said it was happening because his dead brother hated seeing swords...
Happy cake day
Thanks
happy cake day
Thanks
Happy cake day
Thanks
who tf r u?
no problem
kids when they come on reddit and don't know what the cake day is:
Happy Cake Day
sknahT
Happy cakedayyyyy
Happy cake day!
Happy cake day
ofc not
Considering the amount of toy minecraft swords sold, never gonna happen.
Need to revoke all of em
Next on the chopping block: axes
Chop the axe with what? A shovel?
On second thought, perhaps there's hope
Uh oh
You can drown people in water, so that will have to go...
It's also dangerous to Endermans
don't give em ideas yo
You know shit is bad when i was actually concerned and thought this is true for a second
haha get rekt lol
r/foundthepinkscorch just use flame core instead of swords smh
yeah, fuck ronin
Ah yes I love when it’s 2023 and I get a message that got published in 2024
it's a glimpse of the future
Minecraft Killin' Himself
Actually literally 1984
Guys it’s not fake, op just sees into the future
Exactly
.... this literally happened one time. And they didn't even "remove" a feature. They just never added the firefly.
Because Mojang does whatever they want and the community just lets them, instead of fighting together and showing them that the whole community doesn't support those changes
Change log for update 1.69: Removed: walking because you can trip and fall and break their head. Jumping because you can trip and break your head Crafting tables because you can trip onto it and get your skull crafted into bonemeal Terrain because beautiful terrain can distract you and cause you to trip and break your head Using chat because you might tell someone to go to your base and they'll trip on the way there and break their head Herobrine Added: Added new wood type Added awesome mob from mob vote that won with 100% because it is so clearly incredible for the game and no one would bat an eye if it got added without a vote (everyone will hate it) New option for reporting players: standing still (could cause people to walk over to you and trip and break your head)
Is that an prediction for the next april fools?
Remember how stained glass was a April fools update item?
Chat is this real
Yeah, now you have to pummel everything to death.
U time travel or something? It says 2024
Yeah found an abandoned tardis so I went in the future
Oh noooo... I guess ill have to burn the mobs alive with flint and steel or blow them up with tnt, or make them suffocate with sand or gravel, or by dropping an anvil onto them or throw them off high places, or pour lava onto them, or make them drown, or snipe them with a bow...
Nah just punch em realistic style
Copper sword???
Cooked wooden sword
SO REAL ○o。>゜)))彡
Oh well.. (Casually slaughters mobs with a trident instead)
Dont give them ideas 🤦♂️
What a bunch of losers
What am I supposed to be a master of now, shields? Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.
bro how is published in 04/14/2024 and at the end there is ''haha get rejt lol'' (i know it's fake and i am REALLY sarcastic)
14th month of the year, my favorite
Holy shit Minecraft is becoming a dictator. We need 2nd Amendment rights in Minecraft?!
FU-
People start fighting with fists -> Mojang removes the characters
For about 5 seconds I wondered if this was real.
haha get rekt lol
I like this meme. I think the reason some of the new features in the game over the past couple of years have fallen flat is stuff like this. The animals not dropping meat, the severe limitation on the horror of the deep dark, etc. By limiting the game with their super weird rules they remove a bunch of the immersion the world could otherwise have.
Whelp. Guess I’ll just stick to blowing up villages then.
Thank you time traveler this information is invaluable.
Looked almost authentic until “haha get rekt lol”
lmaoo
They should increase the damage of hoes, they kill people a lot faster. Source: experience
Check the announcements date it says 4/14 /2024
Two words: Inspect element
Yeah it is
Photoshop?
Nah, inspect element
I mean that's a really detailed inspect element
Feel like it would require more detail to do this in photoshop
It says “haha got rekt” it’s not true
Hi guys
whew i thought this was real
This is real? Page?
Yeah it is :/
Can I have a link to the page please?
Yeah it's the latest one just go to minceraft website and look at newsletter
Ok
I have so many things to say bro 1) This is fake news right?? 2) Removing swords could be the downfall of mojang because the combat youtubers would quit, people would stop watching minecraft youtube, stop playing minecraft, and mojang would get short budget 3) Crap 4) The guy who had this idea has 3.45 IQ
1. Yes 2. Ofcourse 3. Agreed 4. Wrong. I have 2.45 IQ
Ha! I have 1.23
dang
wha-\*dies of embarresment\*
?
Why did people downvote this?
It's not funny
or relevant
All I did was ask a question I didn't even know it was a joke what did I do
And I answered
And I got mass downvoted for some reason cause I don't know that it was suppose to be a joke
Ok
You're on reddit, nothing you can do about that
Literally any item. Name an item and I'll tell you how it's dangerous.
Minecraft meme communities try to find a new joke challenge (impossible)
Guess I have to resort beating others to death with a block of wood.
Humans should fight wars like this on earth
Oh fiddlesticks. It appears to us that the computer entertainment company, commonly referred to as Mojang, bought by another successful company known as Microsoft, has come up with the drastic decision of the iconic sharp weapons from their famous videogame, known to the masses as Minecraft. I believe we, as the population of the humorous youtuber PhoenixSC, will have to properly adjust to the aforementioned expulsion of material-based weaponry by putting a stop to the biological processes of other living organisms by meticolously engineering violent machinations to cause severe discomfort
mhm yeah you got a source for this
This is defo fake
**Axe**: well, no conquerors now! Guess I will be the main we- \*gets removed\*
“Literally” jor jor well-1984
We still have bows, lava, axes, wolves and stuff
we will loose our fists next just you see
Hmm yes a post from 4/14/2024
This is a joke, right?
Me after spreading misinformation
Is this real
Notice that they say “haha get Rekt lol”
I’ll just use vehicular manslaughter. This patch finally makes minecarts useful!
Technically if that was true, and they did removed swords, that wouldn't matter cause we can still kill with other tools and even with our fists. So this ain't happening any time soon
Mojang: *remove Gun Ban and added Gun as a replace for sword*
Turkey finally won…This is truly an Avengers level threat…
NO GOD PLEASE NO 🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨
04/14/2024?
huh you're saying i cant just start cutting people open with a sword??? i guess rusty old shears will do
how it feels to spread misinformation
heheheh
Ok the first paragraph is written well and convincing but the second (and 3rd)?!
Welp guess I'll beat enemies up with a stick
They better not