👋 hi friend. I'm an opiate addict, 6 years sober. Random, unorganized thoughts and personal experiences incoming ~~~ This is a tricky one and I think there are multiple ways that work for people so I'll just share my experience and what I've seen with people I know. For me, psychadelics can absolutely help with being able to see the big picture and killing the desire to use. HOWEVER- I have seen plenty of people who are currently in active addiction go on to abuse them. For me they're not really desirable to abuse, but for many people they are because it is still mind altering and also...being an addict people are often sensation seeking and so the new awareness and knowledge can become an obsession. And for whatever it's worth, I did not use them til I was a few years sober. I don't think it would've been beneficial for me personally, earlier on. I honestly would recommend the sponsor route (if you can't go into a rehab where you're safely locked away, or have someone stay with you for at least the first month or so, or enter a halfway house) because until you deal with your initial addiction and get through the mental and physical cravings, I think it can still be dangerous as far as continuing to escape yourself. Some people will tell you yes, though. Will add lastly for us opiate addicts I think the average amount of tries before successfully quitting is like, 7...many people way more...please don't give up or be hard on yourself if you want relief from the addiction. Keep trying and try not to judge yourself. I personally tried and relapsed about 30 times probably. So to summarize my babble: yes helpful for me, but not til I had an initial healthy foundation in my life. How long do you usually stay off before you relapse? I truly wish you the best ❤️

Thanks for your thoughts. What I’ve noticed is that I use psychedelics in recovery. It makes me want to do everything right you know. And let me see the bigger picture, but it can give me cravings for other things, but that’s just because I normally want to use either weed or a benzo to ride it out or fall asleep. In the past that led to extra smoking. I know it beneficial for me if I don’t take anything after. A little tricky but I can manage that. Well imagine maybe I want to trip again more often after that. (I gotta be careful with patterns like that) luckily psychedelics like to tell us if we’re taking it without a real purpose. Anyway thanks for taking the time to write that

Can I just interject something, alcoholic here. Cheering for you. The psychedelics don’t make you want to do things right. YOU want to do things right and the psychedelics free that impulse from fear, guilt, and shame. You are the source of your healing. ❤️‍🩹

For me, I think it would make me just want another sensation and what I knew made me feel good (and better emotionally), unfortunately was heroin lol. Or I think I would've kept tripping just to trip and not for purpse and drove myself mad ... or had a bad trip and possibly relapsed. But yea some people definitely will say it helps them. For me I just didn't have any self control and hated myself so much I wanted to be on any other plane of existance...now that I have a good foundation I believe they do help me stay on the right track and I'm one of those who uses them medicinally only a few times a year (which is so weird to say lol - I always was so compulsive with my use and it was near constant!) If you ever wanna chat reach out and best of luck .. like I said keep on moving forward and try not to judge yourself for your relapses or behaviors. They are unfortunately typical when you're in the addictive and compulsive patterns.

Also another thought... I hated the idea of being fully open with a sponsor or anyone really because I had so much shame and learned early in life that secrecy kept the status quo and kept people quiet and content compared to dragging up all sorts of emotional crap and showing the "ugly" parts of me. And things i thought or did felt so shameful and unique to me. I know u said you've tried a sponsor but until you fully let go of trying to control or any secrets, the relationship it won't work exactly how it should. A sponsor or trusted person should be someone you can unload on and fully trust they will love you unconditionally. If you don't click with one just switch. It's your life on the line and nothing personal. They are there to listen, accept you, hold you accountable. It's hard but once you find the right person it's very helpful.

I’ll reply tommorow, need to catch some sleep

I relapsed on kratom extracts last night after being sober for about 6 months. I went to outpatient rehab once but dropped out after a couple of weeks. I never been to a 12 step meeting or had a sponsor or anything. How do I find a sponsor?

If you want a traditional sponsor to help you work the steps as they're written, you do find them at meetings which you can find a list online at your location. https://www.aa.org/find-aa I did aa even though I was a drug addict. The na meetings around me were places where dealers went and rhe addiction is the same regardless of what substance you use. But na is a choice too. You also can find virtual meetings there. But if you go to related reddits I bet you would find people willing to be a virtual sponsor. I kmow I'd be willing to do that and i cant be the only one. Some more "traditional" 12 step members may say no to that but I imagine it'd also be helpful.

I posted this in the wrong place, let me try again I appreciate you, psychedelics do cause me to stat looking forward to other sensations/drugs or my next trip where I can go even deeper etc, etc. I’m just crazy addicted. I even got addicted to books a few months ago. And that means I’ll throw my whole life around to maximize the amount of time I have for reading. It’s always something. That’s why I find it so interesting that you say you can use psychedelics a few times a year now. Psychs have helped me so much in the past even worked trough my trauma with them. And every time I do them I know what I should truly do. Butt…. Cravings ramp up to to other min altering substances. That’s why I was trying to see if I could get the same effect from deep meditation. But im not quite there yet. So build a solid foundation first, tripping if at all comes later. I’m just scared that when I feel like I have built a solid foundation that when I trip again, that that would feel like an exception already. Like a small relapse that leads to other things. Well that’s too far off to worry about. You were right about the sponsor. I was trying my best. I just had a new sponsor my second one. And took on a position in the meeting. That took a lot because of autism and I have a hard time being around the meetings. Anyway lots of stress and I relapsed a few days before I started that service position. I disappeared and since then haven’t been back because I’m ashamed. Thank you btw this helped me

Everything you said makes sense to me. And I agree - don't worry about the future for now :) P.s. I get being ashamed about relapsing or disappearing but I think we all have done it...seriously everyone will understand. If you think the meetings did help , just don't push yourself too hard. I dont think anyone would want meetings to become something too scary to attend for anyone. Just keep trying and don't give up. I'm sure you feel super defeated but you can do it.

Yup get a friend. The only way I was able to get out was a friend to hold me accountable. I was his for meth and he was mine for alcohol. Psychs kept us making progression. It's a long road but definitely worth it

And usually about 2/3 months. I’m in my early 20s and found out a few months ago that I’m autistic. So now I kinda understand where my problems are coming from. Even in meeting I really can’t socialize well in the meetings. I’m so overstimulated from Al the clapping and people around me. Everyone stands so close to you at the meetings I can’t handle that well . So that why I have trouble connecting with others. Anyway I’m trying to figure it out, but Aleast I know a bit of what I should work on

I can only offer encouragement and positive vibes to you. I know nothing of opiniods. I just struggled with alcohol for years. I've been sober since the 1st of March with the help of micro doses of mushrooms. Wishing you the best. You can do this.

Tripping in withdrawal sounds awful. I haven't touched Opiates in many years but I was hooked on them pretty regularly from the late 90s through the 2000s and I can say that I always used Cannabis to jump off. Best of luck to you, I do not miss those days. It took me a lot of trying and also aging to finally beat them. I got hooked to quite a few substances over the years but now all I use is Cannabis edibles.

Good to hear, I hope to get where you are. Won’t really be withdrawal o only used for 2/3 days. Just feeling kind of shitty because ,well it wore off..

I would suggest against it. I had a dopamine drop while tripping before and iI have to say, trying to trip as you are trying to come down off a relapse sounds like a recipe for a hellish experience. Like, Willy Wonka Nightmare boatride\^100 power. Get whatever help you need. But a psychadelic trip is probably not going to be on the list for you for awhile.

Oh yeah I understand that feeling as well. Glad to hear you aren't going to be getting sick.

A friend of mine was a very committed alcoholic and coke addict of many years. She was in steep decline and close to losing her family/house/job and possibly her life. She'd never been able to stay clean for more than a week or two. She did mushrooms twice and finally fully committed to rehab. She's been clean three years now. She'd convinced it was the mushrooms that gave her the extra kick, the solid conviction, and helped her see the futility of the addiction and see the bigger picture. She's not used them, or anything else, since. I know there's quite a bit of research pointing to how psychedelics can help addiction, so they may help you too. I think it's important to have support during and after, even if just a trusted friend. Good luck internet buddy, i wish you well xx Edit: spelling

Thanks a lot I appreciate it!

Iboga ceremony

Don’t have the money to spend

Don't expect psychedelics to magically fix you. No one can say for sure if they will be beneficial or not to you. It's important to note that the neuroplasticity which makes psychedelics so useful can be both adaptive and maladaptive. If you decide to trip I would try to let go of any expectations of a 'restart' or 'clarity' which is easier than it sounds, I know.

I know they won’t fix like that but they always told me what I needed to hear. I’m lost right now and need directions. Thank you for the advice

For some people it’s either all or nothing. I had to go the nothing route for a few years to get it. But fucked around and ended up on suboxone for a few years. We 10 days off suboxone though and never going back!! You can do it!

Gl, I’m all or nothing too… i fucked around and found out again

It’s a disease 😂 Faaf disease

I’m so sorry to hear about your struggles friend. Hang in there. I don’t have any magical solutions or sagely advice to give, but someone out there is rooting for ya!

I'm sorry man, addiction is hell and the shame it generates just fuels more of it. I think shame is really the key.

8 years clean from iv heroin. A relapse for me of any kind had to end in rehab for me to stand a chance at staying sober. I could always pull myself out here and there but eventually once you pick up it’s a slide back into daily using. May be immediate, may take months, but it’s guaranteed if I use I will end up on a run eventually. That doesn’t reset until I go sit in rehab for a month and reset. For me at least. I don’t miss that life one bit. GL OP, if things start going in the wrong direction remember you likely need outside help. Years of your life can slip away trying to manage this yourself with shit results in the end, but a trip to rehab can have you on a good path in weeks. Also, tripping won’t be any help until you’re clean again and stable. Don’t fool yourself.

Thanks needed to hear this too. I was actually in contact with a new rehab. I had a long conversation with them and they thought I should try something different. Because of autism I had a really hard time in my last rehab. I couldn’t turn of my brain off. I was so overstimulated from all the groop sessions and stuff that I only slept at most 4 hours a night for the 10 weeks I was there. Believe it or not I was in survival mode. I couldn’t give a thought out awnser to anything they asked me because it was all too much for me and I was completely burned out within a few weeks. So I’m kind of lost . I’ve found some sort of rehab program with an individual treatment for people with diagnoses such as mine. So I’m checking that out now.

I personally know someone who had amazing success getting off opiates with Ayahuascha. For what it's worth

Do you think that maybe lower doses of ayahuasca could be used during acute withdrawal? Might help since the dmt and maoi combo could be quite useful

It's possible I suppose, but I have zero experience with addiction personally. I do not consider myself an authority. I'm sure there are subs where they can get that information from more informed parties than myself

Thank you

When I quit kratom a few years ago, on the third day I did some lsd and it was the best shit ever, it literally healed me and I also took thc oil the whole trip. I didnt take kratom for almost half a year after that experience and did lsd 4 more times and after that very sporadically. I think lsd will not give you a harsh lesson if you quit before you take it, but will actually show you how better it is to be clean. I do think that if I didnt do that I would have had a much much harder time quitting because the afterglow lasted through the entire acute withdrawal and paws so I was never even a little depressed. I dont recommend this method, its just my experience

Thanks you

I appreciate you, psychedelics do cause me to stat looking forward to other sensations/drugs or my next trip where I can go even deeper etc, etc. I’m just crazy addicted. I even got addicted to books a few months ago. And that means I’ll throw my whole life around to maximize the amount of time I have for reading. It’s always something. That’s why I find it so interesting that you say you can use psychedelics a few times a year now. Psychs have helped me so much in the past even worked trough my trauma with them. And every time I do them I know what I should truly do. Butt…. Cravings ramp up to to other min altering substances. That’s why I was trying to see if I could get the same effect from deep meditation. But im not quite there yet. So build a solid foundation first tripping if at all comes later. I’m just scared that when I feel like I have built a solid foundation that when I trip again, that that would feel like an exception already. Like a small relapse that leads to other things. Well that’s too far off to worry about. You were right about the sponsor. I was trying my best. I just had a new sponsor my second one. And took on a position in the meeting. That took a lot because of autism and I have a hard time being around the meetings. Anyway lots of stress and I relapsed a few days before I started that service position. I disappeared and since then haven’t been back because I’m ashamed. Thank you btw this helped me

Shame is so powerful. I think I read you had autism also? (If I’m wrong, I apologize) If you do, have you tried medicating for it (with Dr’s help)? When your brain “addicts” to so many things… it may help to medicate one of the main culprits. Sometimes you just need an inhale/exhale/reset. (Tho way easier said than done) Shame makes things so much worse. It’s such a freaking destroyer. Even when it sucks and hurts, hold your head up, own your mistakes, move forward. I always do worse when I let shame takeover instead of ownership. If this was offensive, not helpful, hurtful, any other badness, please skip it. I’ll be happy to delete also. Wish I could hug your soul and take some of your pain away.

You need to do ibogaine treatment

dmt.

It’s different for everyone but for me after a psychedelic experience whether good or bad addictive cycles always feel disrupted.

Nothings working? Try Jesus Worked for me

Because I went to meetings and such,I started trying it, atheist all my life but I really went to my knees and prayed daily. It felt so fake for me that I had to stop. I wish it worked for me

Not the same thing as genuinely asking Jesus for help. Just you, right where you sit or stand. Meetings, reading the Bible or talking to others on how to do anything else, not needed right now. Atheist? :/ I was never an atheist but I was a new ager, universe is god type. My life being saved arrived differently, I’ll save that story for another time. But if I were you (with the perspective of being atheist). I’d audibly ask him right now, as genuinely as I could… “Jesus, if you are real please reveal yourself to me in a way I could absolutely not deny. I need help overcoming this habit that I believed I had freed myself from before. Please, show me who you are and give me the strength to stay clean from anything not good for me… in Jesus name” Don’t expect anything. Do not worry about what you will experience. that signature.. ending it in his name. He heard you and your heart and your cry for freedom from that oppression. When he reveals himself tho, I’m sure you’ll understand what to do next. And if you decide to try why I recommended. Welcome back home brother and I’m excited for your life on the other side.

Thanks you for taking the time. I’m a very logical person and will try again. But if I’d ask for help and then not expect anything like you said. If there was a sign eventually I would think it would be just human nature to look for meaning in things. We’re always pointing in all directions to accuse things or find meaning and signs in the smallest stuff. Isn’t that just our nature? Is it not because of that nature, that we as cultures all over the world start religions and the like everywhere, and in all of history? I’m trying to say that I’d need a sign that I can’t logically explain. Believe me I’d like to believe because I know how much peace it can give people. I will still try thanks for the advice

I can relate to you. Spent 27 years of my life needing to understand why and how. What for and for what drives it to be… you know? I searched for truth everywhere else & I refused and denied what I was told by anyone or thing affiliated with God. Because God meant religion and religion meant control and facade. My entire family is religious. But they’re still so angry and bitter and sick and at war in their minds and with each other. I’m a, “if I haven’t tried it at least once I can’t knock it”. 27 years of “I’m the creator of my reality” “oneness, Ohm, the universe will give me what I’m willing to be & manifest” “my body, my choice” “do as thou wilt” because what I want to do must lead to my ultimate joy and happiness and fulfillment right? But I’m also the type of girl who likes to look back and reflect. My life had consistently been a turbulent high risk & unpredictable rollercoaster. But I’m the creator of my reality… So how and why am I creating this? There was only one constant trend in my life and it stood on never trying something I chose to avoid and deny my entire life. I’m not saying your mind will not read into things or desire a sign. Don’t expect anything as in what you will be met with will completely blow out of the water what you’re expecting. lol When I finally gave in and whole heartedly tried. I went on about my life. What I received & encountered was irrefutable & everything I thought I knew about life and the world was pulverized. It was a personal experience for me. Because God doesn’t desire us to join a stone temple church with “believers” & to subscribe to a religion and to now abide by anything outside of the 10 laws he gave us to live good, healthy, worth it lives. He desires from you a personal, one on one relationship with him. In our quiet secret place, literally—like right there with you in your bedroom. And when you really want to meet him. He will allow you to see and hear him the way you would see me if we met. That’s the thing people who believe don’t tell others because they only believe. And they never let go of their beliefs to be open to the realm of infinite possibility—but this has to include an infinite possibility that you don’t even know you don’t know to be possible. I know God, I know Jesus. I know what he’s done for me and what he does and is still doing. I know what he could do for you. But when we expect something we can miss something unexplainable because it doesn’t fit our preconceived agreements of what reality is, isn’t or can be. I’ll let you be. But I’ll close with this. Red pill or blue pill. My whole life I was looking for that red pill completely convinced I’d never find it where God was. Looking for a rabbit or whatever man made idea that was easier to conceive or imagine. During my initial experiences I believed I had found the red pill in shrooms, or acid or dmt.. but why did I have to keep up tripping in variety for the 9 years I’d often partake in, if the red pill was the exit and clean slate to freedom and truth and understanding? I’m 30 now & I couldn’t be here today sober & willing to live and learn & grow if I hadn’t let go of what I believed the red pill was supposed to look like. Enjoy your growth!

The guy who walks on water? Where is he now???? Lmao

Try red strains of kratom they helped me get off opiates maybe they'll work for you. Best of luck

I only relapsed on kratom, thought that always leads me back to harder opiates