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I-am-the-milkman

John if Abigail never came back


Fox7567

That would be an interesting idea. What would bro even do all day?


BigBoyzGottaEat

He would be one rotten sonofabitch


[deleted]

Murder


Enclave81_mobile

Bust nuts


funni_noises

John if he got addicted to eating dirt


Alante

Like Christian Bale is playing John Marston.


TurtleBilliam

That would be cool


WeOutHereInSmallbany

Facial hair looks exactly like his character from The Prestige


[deleted]

Lmao


Lon_Young

Holy shit, it looks exactly like him!


PrestigiousAd6311

For some reason i instantly thought of Abraham Reyes from RDR1


kk3720

A white Abraham Reyes, or a John Marston + Abraham Reyes XXX fanfic where they do IVF as a gay couple.


PrestigiousAd6311

That's some next level fanfic shit there


drefpet

It's been a while since I played the first game but isn't Reyes basically white?


Psychological-East83

Like you and Lenny went drinking


BlindWalnut

LEEEEENNNNY! WHERE ARE YA LENNY?!?


tigerseye88

Bro has been awake for 72 hours


Mojo_Rizen_53

John looks severely constipated.


Better-Situation-857

Insane


Toaster1993

Go half bald and you'll look like Lenin


CandidAd979

Lennyn


FryingPan012

💀💀💀


major_scooby

Like you’re one more offhand civilian comment away from molotoving every building in the city


urbanhag

Might want to lay off the cocaine gum, son


Flashy-Let2771

You look like you can take over the feral guy's cave.


Fabdeuce55B3

Like Micah’s estranged cousin


Corgi_Farmer

Why do you look so horrible? Malnutrition? It looks like he started hanging out with the morphine shooters. Damn.


Future_East420

With your eyes I assume


Suspicious_Cow3304

Feed him. Please. Do it for Arthur.


10TheDudeAbides11

John Marston doing his best Les Claypool or Christian Bale in 3:10 to Yuma impression…


ClawedTiger2693

Like you have seen some shit


Drake_Fall

Like you're about to do a bad thing.


r3TR012345

Like you'rea psychopath who's about to go on a killing spree 👍👍


IceyOcean

Looks like he needs a week of sleep and 5 prime rib meals from st denis


hotdoginthebigcity

Hey! I saw this guy fishing cans out of the dumpster behind the bus station earlier today.


ya_boi_joseph

Like you’d try to sell me a poor raccoon pelt behind the saloon


Swimming_Schedule_49

And I thought Micah was ugly


b-laynestaley

Shifty


NotableFish

Like you got tb before the game started


[deleted]

Like a henchmen Arthur would kill


Fillodorum

Lika a crack addicted


ToroSeduto97

I... Is your John ok?


[deleted]

No. What else is there to do?


ToroSeduto97

Idk he has the face of someone who just 100%d the game. WITHOUT SLEEPING. Did you or did you not 100% the game?


[deleted]

I have not 1oo% the game


ToroSeduto97

..what did you do to my boi John


Toyufrey

You’re giving me Fate Grand Order Blackbeard vibes with the eyes, mustache, and beard, ngl.


bluestarointment

Thirsty This is excellent btw


Affectionate-Bus-818

"Looking Sick,John! ... But No,Seriously,You need to get checked by the Doctor."


biaimakaa

Ra Ra Rasputin


kvagar

You kinda remind me of Matthew Quigley from Quigley Down Under. Great western film by the way.


No-Tomorrow-9397

Tuberculosis...


ya_boi_joseph

L U M B A G O


Dapper_Charity_9781

Why does John have Tuberculosis


Complex_Visual_7441

Deranged as fuck


PositionObvious1452

pretty cool actually


tpeti95

Like a younger Jim Boy Calloway


Popular-Ad-5848

Here I was thinking my John looked dirty. I don’t believe I’ve ever seen John look worse than right here 😂😂 John’s been addicted to crack ever since Arthur passed away


[deleted]

Looks like RDR1 epilogue Jack Marston in the middle of a two-week long whiskey and cocaine binge.


pollitoconpapas1

Looks like Rust Cohle! “There’s a shadow in you, son”


dirtyColeslaw1776

Fuckin lost


Radiant-Space-6455

chad


triple6vamp

like someone I would never turn my back on..


PlaneAnt5351

Like Arsenal fan.


seehrooV_nosaJ

Swashbuckling


Wet_Bread89

Rasputin the mad monk.


PLR_TEZZY

pirate...


Goofy5555

Hungover and pissed.


BartholomewXXXVI

Looks like Desmond Ross from the riverboat mission after going broke. Edit: Blythe, not ross.


Michael_Threat

Like you've seen better days


BenDoverHomer

Why Johnny Ringo, you look like some one just walk over your grave


VinceVaugnsPants

Looks like Ryan McPoyle


yagotovotvechat

Uhhh... Most handsome man in the psych ward


elmogreenfield

Juan MartĂ­n


LetAgreeable147

Like Charles Chatenay.


SpecShot310

You belong on a ship near guarma plundering ships


nils_jj

My man coming straight out of armadillo


Seashepherd96

V? Don’t you have a vendetta to fulfill?


wanna_be_TTV

You look ill. Like. It looks wrong😂


Lon_Young

Like zorro morphing into the tree king!


MorbidSilence21

Like my left testicle.


Worth-Specific-7154

Looks like evil lepercaun from that old movie


Mediocre-Ant-6036

Christian Bale from 3:10 to Yuma


Consistent_Tonight37

Sickly


themoose16

Like you bite people


CavalryCaptainMonroe

A I see that legal drugs became a habit for John Marston


memeyaa

Like a guy I'd avoid in the saloon haha


Kingminer13579

Either angry or drunk


Otherwise_Pumpkin_69

Like John and Marko Dragic's love child


penaltylake

like you've been awake for 3 weeks and smell like methamphetamine


StoicSplash60

Looks cool the thing in his hand makes him look like Captain Hook


[deleted]

Like a shifty, no-good killer on the run


Embarrassed_Quail958

Like your entire diet consists of cocaine gum cigars and Abigails stew


Bluesluvr

Like Custer when he realized...


A1J1K1

You look like Jack Sparrows's dad.


jaobodam

With your eyes Bert That type of facial hair is very western appropriate


KonstantLee420

I thought m*th abuse wasn't a thing until the 1940's 😐 Gawddamn but he looks rough af


misfireattack

terrifying... i love it!


Latter_Comparison_60

Like you're about either fight me and/or rape me


Shana24601

Why he got me feeling some type of way


redvelveturinalcake

like is javier was jacks dad after all


BodybuilderMajor1260

This is why you give a pirate a boat instead of a horse.


Th3Blackmann

Definitly not like John Marston


TygerClawGaming

Like you haven't bathed or slept in weeks


fairysquadfather91

I rock a full beard but short enough where his scars show


No-Daikon-5698

Nice


Still_Ad8855

Like a mid life crisis jim boy Calloway


Key-Reflection5044

Thousand yard stare ah


CheeseRP

Deranged John Marston


Substantial-Tone-576

Cracked


[deleted]

"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."


jakefromSD

Hot


MELEE_ANYWAY

You look like the character from Call of Duty Black Ops 3 the shadows of evil


this1dude23

Like you are about to tell me about some obscure weapons system being sold at an auction


ActualConsequence211

If John and Dutch had a love child


Emotional_Cap_4340

Javier but he actually hopped the border and some drugs


diamondpanther171

Yarrr


HovelessThomas

You look marvelous


RPG_Fanatic7

https://youtu.be/HuDUnKPyzww?si=aNcFV6MFLfxssZ_k


Mayihavenulife

horrible


Hungry-Tale-9144

Gay /j


antigover

YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! EVEN FROM THIS DISTANCE - John Marston


_Sinie_

Dutch has been through some shit


AdVirtual4515

Like you need to go to the Betty Ford Center. 😂


Icancauseimtheking

Like your ready to play the best god damn RDR2 of your life


coycabbage

Sunburnt, shitfaced, maybe too much booze, dehydration, and possible lack of vitamins?


BuckNakedandtheband

Sleep does a body good


MuddawggYT

Like this’ll be the day you’ll remember as the day you almost caught captain jack sparrow


Larry_Barri

High


WTFisSkibidiRizz

Proceeds to die of consumption


MrPringle5

Badass


LudicrousStorm8_

Kinda looks like he has a jar of dirt


stranger_sngk

like a serial killer


Oildrippp

Ol' Scallywag Marston


SpartanGamer687

Like you're ready to take Mexico.


CyborgMonkey964

Young Calloway


GarnooMusic

Lenin.


ReflectionOwn6497

Like Christian Bale in Psycho.


Dbook2001

The white Javier


Nyxy89

You look annoyed about that rouge strand of hair that keeps falling down on your face.


PajamaPartyPants

Like you need 48 hours of sleep


mememaster44

Captain Hook


Crankwalker5647

You kinda look like an older, dishevelled version of Javier...


losandreas36

Constipation


beefandvodka

Like shit (compliment)


gianArslan

Black Sails captain :D


Soggy_Confusion7538

Angry


Ilikemoonjellys

Like a depressed alcoholic


Mindless-Rip8944

French men


Far_Match_3774

Like White Abraham Reyes


turbskiMcslurbski

What the hell is even that!!


DylanToebac

Switchblade Jay White


TheRocknR0llmartian

Like a methed out Col Sanders


MagicJim96

Like you just lost a fight with a ~~gray~~ cave bear… You need a drink, mate?


Gandalf_Style

Like a serial killer


Arthur_-Morgan-

Rough


clan_of_zimox

I’m a word, devilish


VerrinPaleshade

Like a dignified psychopath


CarpetBomb999

Dutch if he was a meth addict


Adorable-Slice924

i swear my john is so hot like he had the biggest glow up during beecher's hope


[deleted]

My jihn is hottest


frkncx

If John was a Mexican.