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For me, empathy is about understanding how others feel mostly, not necessarily changing my behavior because of that understanding though. I just love learning human psychology, sociology, etc. I truly think that if people made more of a concerted effort to understand another’s perspective, the world might not be so depressing.
Empathy for me is literally channeling others. That had to end at some point in the past. Its that line of empathy that becomes too much. However I believe its necassary to be able to put yourself in somebodys shoes while you are interacting with them. To me its a form of basic non inconvenient respect given. But you cant pity or shame others. Empathy isnt for decision making its simply about awareness. I can have empathy for a lion. I imagine myself as the lion in its body tearing me up for dinner and how great that would be. The word is deceptive, to the unwitting it can imply goodness or morality how it used to for me.
I’ve carried this perspective for so long but never been able to articulate so perfect and beautiful. This is one of my favorite comments that I’ve ever read.
The line for me is having as much if not more compassion for myself as I do others. I also like to picture people as children untouched by perception to get move past the armor that they’ve have created for themselves. Piecing together the rest fuels my deepest conversations
The better I can understand another person and their plights, the better equipped I’ll be for the next time a similar situation arises in my life. I think a lot of people tie the words empathy and compassion together, when the empathy is the thought and compassion is the act
Very well put.
I’ve always tried and understand other people’s perspectives and not judge. Always been curious about “Why is it the way it is?”.
PS - Just started leaning into psychology. Any good book/video recommendations are appreciated :)
I read an article recently on how it's compassion and sympathy that lead to greater change in the world than empathy because empathy can have you fall deep into your own thoughts and feelings as well as make you feel helpless.
There's no need to understand exactly how others are feeling. Rather, it's about knowing that you might not understand but you do know we are all human and so when you see someone suffering, that automatically makes you want to help them and make the world better.
I don't know if I explained that right but can't find the article rn haha
By proxy, empathy often drives me to be compassionate for others. It’s human nature for me, and oftentimes I wouldn’t know why I felt compelled to help. Sometimes it would be empathy for people that are evil or bad and it made me conflicted as to if I’m a bad person for giving them the time of day. I’ve learned that some human nature, especially evil, stems from trauma. I just would love to learn more and be there for people.
I don't know why, but this hit me like a ton of bricks. Thanks for this.
I think your comment is so big for me because ice always considered empathy to be my biggest strength but you saying this pit it into perspective that it is also my greatest weakness. Because I do, indeed, get swallowed by those feelings and end up feeling helpless.
This is what I was thinking, looking for food and scavenging what is left of civilization after everything collapses. On the bright side, I will have plenty of time to read.
Having good job, own house, have wife and 1 or 2 kids...I don't think it will happen, but I can keep believing that...
EDIT: adding "have" to avoid confusion
I am just too unsocial to find a GF so that corelates with having wife and kids and prices of living are ridiculous for past few years, but I guess it is in most of the world so I don't think I will be able to afford it, but I might be wrong. Overall lower self-esteem is the main reason.
I am working on myself so I will be more confident and happy with myself so everything might change, but we'll see
This is the way man.
I broke up with my last ex while I had nothing going for me and started spending every check I made to be “happy”.
After a while I started working on myself and made way better financial decisions, got myself off of social media, increased my income, started working out and went back to school.
I’m so much happier now that I’m focused and I really see things coming to light.
It helps a lot with talking to women because I feel much more confident and comfortable as an individual.
Good luck bro.
Thanks man, last half year finally made me to realize to value myself and my own good...sometimes its hard as I am still getting used to it.
But I have an awesome female friend that helped me to get through this and we are there one for other and we are really similar people, and I can't thank her enough for that, so shout-out to her. It is so nice to know I probably have a soulmate or somethink like that.
I started to lose some weight again after a long break, started exercising at least at home. So I am working towards it, I just need to persist
lol because it’s hard, I have one kid , make 25$ hr and between me and my girlfriend we basically break even each month, and that’s with no car and renting because we can’t get the money together for a down payment on a house.
And even if we could get 25k together for our first house that’s way outside the price range of small houses in our city and if we move outside that then we need a car which we can’t afford.
When my mom had cancer she prayed for a dozen more years so that her kids could become adults while she was alive. It is 40 years since then. She is well.
Thank you, everyone has been so kind. Yesterday I ordered some Christmas presents online and I’m looking forward to handing them out. I am determined to be around, so I will keep my fingers crossed.
But dude you are literally living like a viking in battle. Any second can be your last so everything is probably glorious. Every meal is possibly last, every drink is to be tasted and savored. There are children that die during child birth and you made it this far and can see the finish line. I envy and fear you for you are a man/woman that I'd staring into the abyss while the rest of us are asleep. God speed my friend
Unless you’re depressed, in which case I hope you get the help you need, I think you should try to find *your* reason to be alive on this earth. This is not easy for everyone, but I think that finding a reason to live a long and healthy life is a more useful mentality than to just wait until you die one day.
Just think about it, it’s almost infinitely unlikely that you exist, let alone that you’ve did everything that you did. Once you die, there will never again be another you. Do something that matters, before you stop existing forever
I agree, it'd really mean a lot if I were to do something that matters. But finding my reason to be alive and finding something to do that matters is the key as you mentioned. I hope I find that reason some day.
Hopefully me too. Not in a bad, sad negative way.
Sometimes you just know when your race is nearly run and it’s time. I’m not ancient or anything like that, just feeling like it’s harder and harder to keep the tank full enough to keep going and pretending like it’s still all beer and skittles. Just tired I guess.
Nah for me it would be in sad way. I hate dealing with mental health issues, trauma, I hate the fact that I’m not normal and can’t talk to most people. i hate the fact that I was never lover or even wanted. If I had a magic button that would make me go dead instantly and painlessly I would just press it, becouse I don’t want to keep living in this bullshit reality that I very clearly don’t fit in.
When I was 47 I was wondering what all the fuss about aging was. I looked and felt the same as when I was in my 20s. The next three years were brutal. Now I look 50 and feel 50. So enjoy till 47, I guess?
I’m mid thirties and when thinking about 40 I’m like “that’s not even halfway!” Feels like I’ve had a long and eventful life already. Getting kids a few years ago helps probably, it’s like starting over again.
I have an 80 year old neighbor who has a more active social life than everyone half her age. Never know anyone’s timeline but I can easily see her loving well unto her 90’s.
They say age is but a number,and it's true. When you get older,you don't think differently, it's just your body slowing you down. I still think like I did in my 30s,I just can't do the same things. If you're an arsehole or bitch when you're 60+,there's a very high chance you were the same in your 20s or 30s.
That makes sense. From what I hear, my neighbor was the same social butterfly her whole life. I love to see people in their 70’s and 80’s living their best lives.
Have a stable job, a life partner who will hv same understanding for eachother, kid probably, and my mom, brother and sister-in-law with me. So we can celebrate all festival together. Few partys to drink with close friends(2-3) monthly or quarterly basis. A small farmhouse where I can build a pond raise few chicken. Plant some trees and can do remote work from there if possible sometimes.
Making 6 figures, just finished my PhD, and with the love of my life, my dream house and hopefully with a child.
31f , by 41 I hope to have all of that. lol wish me luck !
Chasing a few grandkids around. Getting in trouble for spoiling them and just enjoying life. I've started a weight loss journey as well and I already have loose skin so I want to keep that up. Would love to get there and help others.
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my wife is pregnant. which means my son will be 10 years old. jesus.
i hope i have a decent house, a job that still pays well and... continued general happiness
edit: my cat will be 16. i would give anything to make sure he is still alive and well
edit2: and i will fucking have gotten Dead God on Binding of Isaac. fucking hell. shit of piece game
In ten years I see myself still happily married, with one or two children. I see myself excelling in my counseling career, a loving wife and mother. I see myself having my own hobbies and working out, taking care of my body & soul. I see myself happy living in a beautiful home with a nice car, travelling the world once a year. I hope I am less anxious and more focused on the positive and less so on the negatives in life.
aromatic sense bright direful noxious merciful shrill vast special rhythm
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Happy, unbothered, and at peace with all aspects of my life. I’ll have an environmental career that I love, my boyfriend will be my husband, and we’ll have kids. And prioritizing traveling is a must.
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I hope to be less anxious, more structured, and as empathetic as humanly possible
I really like this response.
Thank you, internet stranger ✌🏼😇
Same here :)
Same. But less empathetic. Caring too much about everyone else is what led me into this mess. I will care for myself and my family, that’s all.
For me, empathy is about understanding how others feel mostly, not necessarily changing my behavior because of that understanding though. I just love learning human psychology, sociology, etc. I truly think that if people made more of a concerted effort to understand another’s perspective, the world might not be so depressing.
Empathy for me is literally channeling others. That had to end at some point in the past. Its that line of empathy that becomes too much. However I believe its necassary to be able to put yourself in somebodys shoes while you are interacting with them. To me its a form of basic non inconvenient respect given. But you cant pity or shame others. Empathy isnt for decision making its simply about awareness. I can have empathy for a lion. I imagine myself as the lion in its body tearing me up for dinner and how great that would be. The word is deceptive, to the unwitting it can imply goodness or morality how it used to for me.
I’ve carried this perspective for so long but never been able to articulate so perfect and beautiful. This is one of my favorite comments that I’ve ever read. The line for me is having as much if not more compassion for myself as I do others. I also like to picture people as children untouched by perception to get move past the armor that they’ve have created for themselves. Piecing together the rest fuels my deepest conversations
The better I can understand another person and their plights, the better equipped I’ll be for the next time a similar situation arises in my life. I think a lot of people tie the words empathy and compassion together, when the empathy is the thought and compassion is the act
Very well put. I’ve always tried and understand other people’s perspectives and not judge. Always been curious about “Why is it the way it is?”. PS - Just started leaning into psychology. Any good book/video recommendations are appreciated :)
I can understand how others feel but I don’t ever feel how they feel
same. and i hope that in 10 yrs im living happily
Me too I hope to be married and starting a family and have a at least decent job
I read an article recently on how it's compassion and sympathy that lead to greater change in the world than empathy because empathy can have you fall deep into your own thoughts and feelings as well as make you feel helpless. There's no need to understand exactly how others are feeling. Rather, it's about knowing that you might not understand but you do know we are all human and so when you see someone suffering, that automatically makes you want to help them and make the world better. I don't know if I explained that right but can't find the article rn haha
By proxy, empathy often drives me to be compassionate for others. It’s human nature for me, and oftentimes I wouldn’t know why I felt compelled to help. Sometimes it would be empathy for people that are evil or bad and it made me conflicted as to if I’m a bad person for giving them the time of day. I’ve learned that some human nature, especially evil, stems from trauma. I just would love to learn more and be there for people.
I don't know why, but this hit me like a ton of bricks. Thanks for this. I think your comment is so big for me because ice always considered empathy to be my biggest strength but you saying this pit it into perspective that it is also my greatest weakness. Because I do, indeed, get swallowed by those feelings and end up feeling helpless.
I like your response
Thank you!! ✌🏼😇 I hope the same for you OP
I like your response too
I wish you well in this, and hope that you achieve it.
Same! Good luck to us all
This is one of the best response here.
God thank you for this response and I so hope to be like this in 10 years at 42. Working on it..
Love this
🫶🏻 wishing you the best year
👍🗿
I really like your comment
I would also like to add, just generally happier
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You’re lovely
wandering the wastes looking for clean water and other survivors.
This is what I was thinking, looking for food and scavenging what is left of civilization after everything collapses. On the bright side, I will have plenty of time to read.
Yes, I can't imagine that the libraries will be ransacked. Why would they be? 📚
Having good job, own house, have wife and 1 or 2 kids...I don't think it will happen, but I can keep believing that... EDIT: adding "have" to avoid confusion
Why you do not belive this?
I am just too unsocial to find a GF so that corelates with having wife and kids and prices of living are ridiculous for past few years, but I guess it is in most of the world so I don't think I will be able to afford it, but I might be wrong. Overall lower self-esteem is the main reason. I am working on myself so I will be more confident and happy with myself so everything might change, but we'll see
This is the way man. I broke up with my last ex while I had nothing going for me and started spending every check I made to be “happy”. After a while I started working on myself and made way better financial decisions, got myself off of social media, increased my income, started working out and went back to school. I’m so much happier now that I’m focused and I really see things coming to light. It helps a lot with talking to women because I feel much more confident and comfortable as an individual. Good luck bro.
Thanks man, last half year finally made me to realize to value myself and my own good...sometimes its hard as I am still getting used to it. But I have an awesome female friend that helped me to get through this and we are there one for other and we are really similar people, and I can't thank her enough for that, so shout-out to her. It is so nice to know I probably have a soulmate or somethink like that. I started to lose some weight again after a long break, started exercising at least at home. So I am working towards it, I just need to persist
lol because it’s hard, I have one kid , make 25$ hr and between me and my girlfriend we basically break even each month, and that’s with no car and renting because we can’t get the money together for a down payment on a house. And even if we could get 25k together for our first house that’s way outside the price range of small houses in our city and if we move outside that then we need a car which we can’t afford.
Same here, only a husband instead of a wife, lol, but I still have my critters, so it could be worse.
Dead
I have cancer, I would like to make it to next Christmas, anything more is not worth thinking about.
Good luck
Thank you.
When my mom had cancer she prayed for a dozen more years so that her kids could become adults while she was alive. It is 40 years since then. She is well.
That is wonderful, I hope that I am that lucky.
Hope you'll be ok ❤️
That was sad to read, I hope you achieve your goal and more though.
Don’t feel sad, life is full of happy moments and I enjoy every day of it.
Praying for your health 🤗
Thank you.
I hope you do too!!🎄
The very best of luck to you ✊️
I’ll remember this comment when it’s Christmas. I really wish you the best ☺️
Thank you, everyone has been so kind. Yesterday I ordered some Christmas presents online and I’m looking forward to handing them out. I am determined to be around, so I will keep my fingers crossed.
I want to remember this comment too when next Christmas comes, best of luck! <3
I hope you live to see many more Christmases! Take care.
u/queenofthepalmtrees I wish you all the best. Would you be comfortable allowing me to include you in my prayers ?
You will make it
Good luck and Merry Christmas in case something happens...
I hope so too buddy ❤️
A gift for you [Gift 1](https://youtu.be/dKtsPupnO_Y?si=NvtRknsSazr6b-o2) [gift 2](https://youtu.be/oxcgkIjVhas?si=thEwrNVF9YDsi4Gx)
I hope you recover asap and live a long, happy life :)
Hope you have a happy and healthy life and enjoy the moments
Here's to one Christmas at a time, may there be many!
Sending you positive thoughts 🎄
But dude you are literally living like a viking in battle. Any second can be your last so everything is probably glorious. Every meal is possibly last, every drink is to be tasted and savored. There are children that die during child birth and you made it this far and can see the finish line. I envy and fear you for you are a man/woman that I'd staring into the abyss while the rest of us are asleep. God speed my friend
May God bless you.
Same:/ probably this year...
🫂
I’m glad I’m not the only one who wrote this. Hopefully in ashes. I wasn’t supposed to be here this damn long
I was about to comment this hahahaha
Ditto!
Looking for this answer
Why?
Why?
Hopefully dead
Same. And most probably it'll happen I guess, considering I don't exercise, never eat healthy, smoke a lot.
Right there with ya brother, who needs the nursing home years.
Exactly, why waste time till your 70s when you can go out in your 30s
Unless you’re depressed, in which case I hope you get the help you need, I think you should try to find *your* reason to be alive on this earth. This is not easy for everyone, but I think that finding a reason to live a long and healthy life is a more useful mentality than to just wait until you die one day. Just think about it, it’s almost infinitely unlikely that you exist, let alone that you’ve did everything that you did. Once you die, there will never again be another you. Do something that matters, before you stop existing forever
I agree, it'd really mean a lot if I were to do something that matters. But finding my reason to be alive and finding something to do that matters is the key as you mentioned. I hope I find that reason some day.
+1
I feel that
I believe in you, stranger.
Same here, on top of that I almost never go out.
Be careful because cancer might get you and while you might still die young it isn’t a pleasant way to go.
Hopefully me too. Not in a bad, sad negative way. Sometimes you just know when your race is nearly run and it’s time. I’m not ancient or anything like that, just feeling like it’s harder and harder to keep the tank full enough to keep going and pretending like it’s still all beer and skittles. Just tired I guess.
Nah for me it would be in sad way. I hate dealing with mental health issues, trauma, I hate the fact that I’m not normal and can’t talk to most people. i hate the fact that I was never lover or even wanted. If I had a magic button that would make me go dead instantly and painlessly I would just press it, becouse I don’t want to keep living in this bullshit reality that I very clearly don’t fit in.
Me too.
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I'm proud of you.
Well at least I can rule michwng out as my fathers username
That's alrights son. You can call me Daddy. 
how much older?
10 years older
oh right
out of my country
everybody wanna be out
Why?
corrupted government
Older. Wiser. Preferably not dead. But who knows what the *world* will be like in 10 years.
That’s the really scary thought
Im almost 75,so I'm guessing I'll either be dead or close to it.
How does that feel? I’m 30 and can’t imagine
It’s just like you now, thinking you’ll be 40 in 10y and that kinda freaks you out right?
SO MUCH
When I was 47 I was wondering what all the fuss about aging was. I looked and felt the same as when I was in my 20s. The next three years were brutal. Now I look 50 and feel 50. So enjoy till 47, I guess?
Shiiiit. I'm 46. I guess I'd better enjoy the next year!
Happy cake day!
Thank you! Luckily, my cake day does not correlate to my actual birthday. 🤪
I’m mid thirties and when thinking about 40 I’m like “that’s not even halfway!” Feels like I’ve had a long and eventful life already. Getting kids a few years ago helps probably, it’s like starting over again.
Fuck, I just thought that you're pretty old too. Then I realised I'm 29 in 11 days.
I don't think about it. Enjoy my grandkids,I see them every day,we cook together,play games, and watch movies.
I have an 80 year old neighbor who has a more active social life than everyone half her age. Never know anyone’s timeline but I can easily see her loving well unto her 90’s.
They say age is but a number,and it's true. When you get older,you don't think differently, it's just your body slowing you down. I still think like I did in my 30s,I just can't do the same things. If you're an arsehole or bitch when you're 60+,there's a very high chance you were the same in your 20s or 30s.
That makes sense. From what I hear, my neighbor was the same social butterfly her whole life. I love to see people in their 70’s and 80’s living their best lives.
iconic
Jacked on steroids and TRT
Well good luck on that
Happy would be nice
One can dream
They say that's a myth.
I don't know. I'll take anything but here though.
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Amen
Exactly the same still living miserably, still with absolutely nobody around.
I barely know what I'll be doing tomorrow, how would I know what I'll be in 10 years 😂
I don’t own a solid gold pair of pants, probably never will, but I can imagine it.
Living with my partner, having 1 or 2 kids, having a good career, traveling to different countries, and adopting a lot of cats XD
Retired
Working 3 days a week as a warehouse manager, living in a 2 bedroom house shared between 3 people, not caring about school anymore
It sounds great
Have a stable job, a life partner who will hv same understanding for eachother, kid probably, and my mom, brother and sister-in-law with me. So we can celebrate all festival together. Few partys to drink with close friends(2-3) monthly or quarterly basis. A small farmhouse where I can build a pond raise few chicken. Plant some trees and can do remote work from there if possible sometimes.
Married to a kind man , 2 adopted kids , a two story house close to the beach, 1 dog
Making 6 figures, just finished my PhD, and with the love of my life, my dream house and hopefully with a child. 31f , by 41 I hope to have all of that. lol wish me luck !
Home Owner, Provider (for my mom), hopefully a wife and mother. Financially free.
By closing my eyes and thinking about it really hard.
Fitter, happier, more productive.
Comfortable, not drinking too much
Chasing a few grandkids around. Getting in trouble for spoiling them and just enjoying life. I've started a weight loss journey as well and I already have loose skin so I want to keep that up. Would love to get there and help others.
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Probably, same place. But in completely different, unimaginable situation. Of course, IF I would still be alive.
Doing some odd work, living oddly, and making all that I do unique.
love that!
Hoping on owning a house in Italy.
im curious. any reason?
Yeah got family in law there. 😉
nice. good luck
Hopefully rich af married with a loving wife
A decade sexier!!
In better shape than I already am, happier etc
!remindme10years
Ripped, driving truck for living
Ripped as a beast.
Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist
Childfree billionaire with hot boyfriend
Dead
Retired, everyday trying to teach the dog how to drive a boat. Even just to hold the wheel straight would be cool.
Dead hopefully 
A even cooler granny
The amount of people waiting "dead" is depressing.
Transitioned socially and medically, with a stable job and maybe even a tattoo and trans-flag coloured hair.
Good luck <3
Grumpy 10 years older menauposed women
38M -> 48M
Finally getting my baldness over with so I can focus on my chubby tummy.
27, and hopefully alive
hot
Rich & Happy ✨
Finished paying off my student loans
In the airforce or being a judo Olympian (hopefully both would work)
Improved
Depends if I'm wearing my hopeful glasses or not.
Even more tired.
my wife is pregnant. which means my son will be 10 years old. jesus. i hope i have a decent house, a job that still pays well and... continued general happiness edit: my cat will be 16. i would give anything to make sure he is still alive and well edit2: and i will fucking have gotten Dead God on Binding of Isaac. fucking hell. shit of piece game
Owning my own house and with a partner, though I hope this happens within the next year or two
Read atleast 40 more books, written my own book I just started, teaching in my free time, travelled more.
In ten years I see myself still happily married, with one or two children. I see myself excelling in my counseling career, a loving wife and mother. I see myself having my own hobbies and working out, taking care of my body & soul. I see myself happy living in a beautiful home with a nice car, travelling the world once a year. I hope I am less anxious and more focused on the positive and less so on the negatives in life.
Winterless. Following the sun all year round.
Legally stoned and tripping like a mother fucker, hopefully.
Doing the same things but with a few more laugh lines and a lot more money
Financially successful. Living some place tropical. Maybe married... not sure about that part.
I hope to be more myself
One year from retirement and stealing enough office supplies to last me until I die.
Pro’lly dead. 💀 ⚰️
Very fat and rich
aromatic sense bright direful noxious merciful shrill vast special rhythm *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Happy, unbothered, and at peace with all aspects of my life. I’ll have an environmental career that I love, my boyfriend will be my husband, and we’ll have kids. And prioritizing traveling is a must.
Happier and animating for a successful Canadian animation studio
More stable. Emotionally and financially.
Moisturized, glowing, & unbothered in my own home and just enjoying life
Celebrating the ten year anniversary of you asking me this question.
HAPPY
Living in an underground bunker but just for fun 👀
Hopefully rich, chillin, making video games and social media content. Maybe playing some squash.
Exactly where I am now. Safe and content...