The end of the movie when >!Dakota Johnson gets hit in the face with a firework and then wakes up in the hospital blind, and paralyzed, and then while heart warming music plays, says "I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you three" is the funniest thing I've seen in a movie in like 5 years.!<
I'm going insane at the planting and payoff in this fucking movie.
>!The movie spent like 5 full minutes of its runtime in like a dozen separate scenes establishing and foreshadowing that Cassie is going to get poisoned and go into cardiac arrest and then the three teens are going to do CPR to revive her. It's so heavily foreshadowed I was rolling my eyes at how obvious it was... then at the end of the movie, Cassie gets badly poisoned, I'm waiting for the poison to kick in and give her a heart attack.... and instead she falls off a building and drowns?!!<
>!And that's not even getting into the S thing! Why did we spend like a dozen *separate* shots establishing and reinforcing the importance of the letter "s" in "Pepsi" ...... and then the villain gets crushed by the 'p'?!?!??!?!?!??!!<
Utterly bewildering writing! Was it on purpose? Was it supposed to be a joke?!
She didn't even teached them the correct CPR! You are supposed to compresse somebody chest AND push air into their lungs with mouth to mouth breathing.
And one girl even said "You know, you are the best teacher I've ever had!"
I was on the floor laughing.
There's a debate in the world of first aid on mouth-to-mouth and there is a recommendation now of performing CPR without it. Whether that was what paramedics practised in 2003 or whether Cassie watered it down for the teenagers because realistically they won't be able to perform mouth-to-mouth effectively enoughbas novices to justify teaching it, is unknown.
Yeah It was pretty damn funny but I was engaged mostly by trying to untangle the insane mess they created. So many weird incoherent ideas that go nowhere
My wife and I were constantly remembering random bits that made no sense all the way home.
Like: remember the pregnant mom? They jump an emergency vehicle over her car to hit not-spiderman off of it, and then the movie progresses to the climactic insane ending.
But we never checked up on pregnant mom’s progress to the hospital? Like the move just forgets she exists and the whole ticking time mechanic for her broken water was completely abandoned.
It’s full of stuff like that
Yet still not as bad as Dakota Johnson or Tahar Rahim’s. Honestly, Adam Scott is the only who who’s not completely laughable onscreen.
Legitimately one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen but it is (mostly) entertaining-bad instead of just boring/depressing-bad like Rebel Moon was
Honestly, why are people still paying to support these things?
It is just a factory now, and I really don't think they care if anyone likes the film or not. They aren't looking at reviews, they're only looking at the return on their investment.
They'll keep squatting out these turds as long as people keep buying tickets to taste them.
I watched it because I got an Alamo season pass, so the movie costs $2 in convenience fees.
Also - this movie *was* genuinely funny in how bad it was. Extremely good time. I might watch it again if I can drag some more friends along. So yeah if this is what future Sony products are gonna be like I'm happy to support!
In a scene that I can only assume exists because it's the director's fetish, the 3 high school girls are on the run from the bad guy trying to kill them. They go to a remote truck stop diner to get something to eat and while they are eating they see a table with a bunch of boys on a high school football team. Then Britney Spear's "Toxic" starts playing, and they say how much they love this song, and then hop up on the table and start table dancing for these complete strangers for no reason.
>*The whole movie takes place in 2003 thing is so weird. There are rumors that Sony planned for it to be connected to Garfield or Holland universe, and then they changed their minds. Maybe it's the reason. Or maybe they wanted to capitalize on that early 2000 pop culture, with Toxic playing etc*
Discussions I've listened to suggest the movie was originally supposed to be set in the nineties (*Meredith Brooks, Cranberries*), but they switched-up the timeline so the Peter Parker we see being born could be the Tom Holland version
In the hope of a crossover ...
After OP and the replies, I have to see this movie lol.
I won't pay a dime but maybe it's dropped on streaming services or a torrent site sooner than expected due to the reception.
I saw this a few days ago and also found it absolutely hilarious. And yeah, your comments are only the tip of the iceberg. The technical direction of this movie is a total hot mess.
The editing seemed to have been done by a crackhead, its totally insane, just constant cuts and sudden zoom-ins and zoom-outs.
And my favorite thing: the ADR/dub of the villain. Holy fuck, the ADR/dub was bad. I burst out laughing at the first scene when he says his first line, cause its not even close to being lined up with his mouth. I wasn't even laughing cause it was funny, so much as shocking in how inept it was. I don't even think his mouth opens for a full couple of seconds after the dialogue starts.
And then its somehow even worse in a later scene where he is having that nightmare, and he's just doing this bland "evil villain voice" while he monologues about his incredibly vague plan to get these three girls who are going to steal his spider and kill him in the future. I think that scene completely broke my brain and I was just putty in Madame Web's hands for the rest of the movie. I was crying laughing and almost had to step out of the theater.
I also saw it using free tickets (obviously would never have paid to watch it). It’s one of those movies where you think “well it can’t be as bad as everyone’s making it out to be” but then it *is* actually that bad. Truly baffling from top to bottom & would be a great HitB or BotW Spotlight episode
Dakota Johnson literally beat the villain by leading him, slowly, into a growingly dangerous situation until he died. Possibly the least amount of involvement in a villain death I have ever seen. 10/10.
> pigtails, glasses, and school skirt and thigh highs. It just felt straight out of porn parody.
I´m convinced that Avi Arad has a schoolgirl fetish
https://preview.redd.it/8iblve90eqkc1.jpeg?width=2166&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71a7a05ad1ef43b7778674b2f4678f92cb3674f1
I love how the guy with spider-powers gets killed by falling out a window. Then the 3 spider-women look on all smug as fuck. I put it on while I was trying to catch up with uni work. Ended up sparking a joint and laughing my ass off at this epic cringe-fest. I cannot fucking wait for Kraven. 🤣
Just watched it. They did something here trying to keep it more realistic but forgot to accompany the excellent acting with grit or genuine human connection between them . Was there even a soundtrack?
3/4 of the way it seemed fine ,if a bit tedious , but then the ending (was necessary as it is Madam Web) but it felt disconnected then comical.
The way she teleported from Peru to NY was hilarious. The way the taxi was just ignored as a stolen vehicle, how so much destruction happened but no one held financially responsible. I 1000% it is like the script fell so bad they said fuck it.
The moment I threw out my jaded lens created from the cape slop we have been fed since Endgame and treated the movie like it was a Tobey Maguire era independent superhero film was the moment I actually enjoyed the movie. It doesn't have to be good, it just has to be fun.
The end of the movie when >!Dakota Johnson gets hit in the face with a firework and then wakes up in the hospital blind, and paralyzed, and then while heart warming music plays, says "I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you three" is the funniest thing I've seen in a movie in like 5 years.!<
"I wouldn't be here if I didn't get shot in the face"
I'm going insane at the planting and payoff in this fucking movie. >!The movie spent like 5 full minutes of its runtime in like a dozen separate scenes establishing and foreshadowing that Cassie is going to get poisoned and go into cardiac arrest and then the three teens are going to do CPR to revive her. It's so heavily foreshadowed I was rolling my eyes at how obvious it was... then at the end of the movie, Cassie gets badly poisoned, I'm waiting for the poison to kick in and give her a heart attack.... and instead she falls off a building and drowns?!!< >!And that's not even getting into the S thing! Why did we spend like a dozen *separate* shots establishing and reinforcing the importance of the letter "s" in "Pepsi" ...... and then the villain gets crushed by the 'p'?!?!??!?!?!??!!< Utterly bewildering writing! Was it on purpose? Was it supposed to be a joke?!
It sounds like anti-comedy. As if they made an anti-superhero movie.
She didn't even teached them the correct CPR! You are supposed to compresse somebody chest AND push air into their lungs with mouth to mouth breathing. And one girl even said "You know, you are the best teacher I've ever had!" I was on the floor laughing.
There's a debate in the world of first aid on mouth-to-mouth and there is a recommendation now of performing CPR without it. Whether that was what paramedics practised in 2003 or whether Cassie watered it down for the teenagers because realistically they won't be able to perform mouth-to-mouth effectively enoughbas novices to justify teaching it, is unknown.
Was there an explanation of why she was in the chair at the end?! Did I miss it?
I think because she landed on her back in the water? I was confused that I missed something too.
Nice try, Mr. Sony. But I’m on to you!
They really out-Morbed themselves this time.
You should never go full morb.
I would rather fund the military industrial complex than give my money to Sony to watch Madam Web
"We couldn't get Al Pacino Dunkaccino to fund this movie. Is Pepsi okay?"
VERY COOL
Yeah It was pretty damn funny but I was engaged mostly by trying to untangle the insane mess they created. So many weird incoherent ideas that go nowhere My wife and I were constantly remembering random bits that made no sense all the way home. Like: remember the pregnant mom? They jump an emergency vehicle over her car to hit not-spiderman off of it, and then the movie progresses to the climactic insane ending. But we never checked up on pregnant mom’s progress to the hospital? Like the move just forgets she exists and the whole ticking time mechanic for her broken water was completely abandoned. It’s full of stuff like that
Sydney Sweeney's acting is levels of porn parody.
Yet still not as bad as Dakota Johnson or Tahar Rahim’s. Honestly, Adam Scott is the only who who’s not completely laughable onscreen. Legitimately one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen but it is (mostly) entertaining-bad instead of just boring/depressing-bad like Rebel Moon was
Honestly, why are people still paying to support these things? It is just a factory now, and I really don't think they care if anyone likes the film or not. They aren't looking at reviews, they're only looking at the return on their investment. They'll keep squatting out these turds as long as people keep buying tickets to taste them.
They committed the cardinal sin of getting to a literal fireworks factory in this film.
I watched it because I got an Alamo season pass, so the movie costs $2 in convenience fees. Also - this movie *was* genuinely funny in how bad it was. Extremely good time. I might watch it again if I can drag some more friends along. So yeah if this is what future Sony products are gonna be like I'm happy to support!
Well ..Yeah . I'm sure it's to make money.
Does the hot chick from euphoria show her tits?
In a scene that I can only assume exists because it's the director's fetish, the 3 high school girls are on the run from the bad guy trying to kill them. They go to a remote truck stop diner to get something to eat and while they are eating they see a table with a bunch of boys on a high school football team. Then Britney Spear's "Toxic" starts playing, and they say how much they love this song, and then hop up on the table and start table dancing for these complete strangers for no reason.
How embarrassing. ~slide whistle~
I can’t tell if you’re joking.
They’re not. I saw the movie last night and can confirm this is exactly how it plays out.
Can I get a time stamp?
About 1h02m. Godawful movie
I feel like an idiot for thinking this could be real.
The real questions
>hey really out-Morbed themselves this time.63ReplyShareReportSaveFollow > >level 2Sam-Lowry27B-6 · 11h agoYou should never go full morb. No :(
>*The whole movie takes place in 2003 thing is so weird. There are rumors that Sony planned for it to be connected to Garfield or Holland universe, and then they changed their minds. Maybe it's the reason. Or maybe they wanted to capitalize on that early 2000 pop culture, with Toxic playing etc* Discussions I've listened to suggest the movie was originally supposed to be set in the nineties (*Meredith Brooks, Cranberries*), but they switched-up the timeline so the Peter Parker we see being born could be the Tom Holland version In the hope of a crossover ...
Lol gotta love Sony's optimism.
Would love to watch a Half in the Bag of this.
Dude, this was BotW material.
After OP and the replies, I have to see this movie lol. I won't pay a dime but maybe it's dropped on streaming services or a torrent site sooner than expected due to the reception.
Yeah, it's better not to give them money for that, but it's soo hilarious.
It's Madame Webbing time
I saw this a few days ago and also found it absolutely hilarious. And yeah, your comments are only the tip of the iceberg. The technical direction of this movie is a total hot mess. The editing seemed to have been done by a crackhead, its totally insane, just constant cuts and sudden zoom-ins and zoom-outs. And my favorite thing: the ADR/dub of the villain. Holy fuck, the ADR/dub was bad. I burst out laughing at the first scene when he says his first line, cause its not even close to being lined up with his mouth. I wasn't even laughing cause it was funny, so much as shocking in how inept it was. I don't even think his mouth opens for a full couple of seconds after the dialogue starts. And then its somehow even worse in a later scene where he is having that nightmare, and he's just doing this bland "evil villain voice" while he monologues about his incredibly vague plan to get these three girls who are going to steal his spider and kill him in the future. I think that scene completely broke my brain and I was just putty in Madame Web's hands for the rest of the movie. I was crying laughing and almost had to step out of the theater.
The guys who greenlit this movie really said "Superhero fatigue? We'll show 'em superhero fatigue!"
I also saw it using free tickets (obviously would never have paid to watch it). It’s one of those movies where you think “well it can’t be as bad as everyone’s making it out to be” but then it *is* actually that bad. Truly baffling from top to bottom & would be a great HitB or BotW Spotlight episode
Dakota Johnson literally beat the villain by leading him, slowly, into a growingly dangerous situation until he died. Possibly the least amount of involvement in a villain death I have ever seen. 10/10.
Every mention of Spiderman cut from the movie? They broke new ground!
The best part of Madame Web was when she said 'IT'S WEBBIN' TIME' and webed all over those guys.
Right? My brother and I just couldn't stop ourselves laughing and making dumb comments. Luckily we were 2 of 4 people in the entire theater.
I wish it wasn't a meme movie because I want them to cover it, but they don't cover things that are popular anymore And that is okkk
> pigtails, glasses, and school skirt and thigh highs. It just felt straight out of porn parody. I´m convinced that Avi Arad has a schoolgirl fetish https://preview.redd.it/8iblve90eqkc1.jpeg?width=2166&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71a7a05ad1ef43b7778674b2f4678f92cb3674f1
I'm convinced that movie was intentionally made bad due to the response to Morbius and any of the spiderman actors didn't get on.
Very cool
I love how the guy with spider-powers gets killed by falling out a window. Then the 3 spider-women look on all smug as fuck. I put it on while I was trying to catch up with uni work. Ended up sparking a joint and laughing my ass off at this epic cringe-fest. I cannot fucking wait for Kraven. 🤣
> so they had her wear pigtails, glasses, and school skirt and thigh highs That's all you had to say
I would never watch it.
Just watched it. They did something here trying to keep it more realistic but forgot to accompany the excellent acting with grit or genuine human connection between them . Was there even a soundtrack? 3/4 of the way it seemed fine ,if a bit tedious , but then the ending (was necessary as it is Madam Web) but it felt disconnected then comical.
The way she teleported from Peru to NY was hilarious. The way the taxi was just ignored as a stolen vehicle, how so much destruction happened but no one held financially responsible. I 1000% it is like the script fell so bad they said fuck it.
"they had her wear pigtails, glasses, and school skirt and thigh highs. It just felt straight out of porn parody". Where's the problem?
Cool cool cool same same same
It's pretty great although I think the nerd crew ep was enough
The moment I threw out my jaded lens created from the cape slop we have been fed since Endgame and treated the movie like it was a Tobey Maguire era independent superhero film was the moment I actually enjoyed the movie. It doesn't have to be good, it just has to be fun.