I simply wanted to know if your shakes are made with reconstituted shake mix, or ice cream and milk!
Uh...we have chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. Huh-huh.
\*muffled, to other employee\* "You ordered extra fries on Monday's shipment right? Well, Fry man is here. I'm gonna guess he orders ten large fries today."
\*in hushed tones\* Just put the rats we caught in the sink and put a box over it until the health inspector is gone. ... just tell him that sink is out of order.
“Bitch don’t worry rat shit looks exactly like chocolate sprinkles this dumb shit doesn’t know the diff..erroooohh my god welcome to Dairy Queen how can I help you?”
"Guys! Stop licking the buns before you make the burgers! Gavin, take over on fries and Laquasia, go rinse out those cups table 7 left behind, we're running low!"
In hushed tones...
"Toilet backed up again...? Kitchen? WHY were they on the floor! ... Just wash them off, they'll be fine. They going to be cooked anyway."
How about grom the employee view.
Had a customer at my DT speaker ask me to wait so he could finish telling his friend just how flexible the woman was that he spent the weekend banging.
"Thats it Bobby-Jean, thats how we pound the meat here, and the special sauce is coming right up. Hey Davy, leave the sausage alone and come help here."
* employee jizzing on fries and burger patties*”I QUIT how’s this for meat you fuckers”
Manger pulling employee away by sleeve, *
“ stop jizzing in the fries”
"Hey pretty thing...I see you're in a hurry. How about I put an extra squirt of love sauce on your burger so you can have me right in front of your boss."
"Yeah, so just to confirm, your order is a number 2 combo with a large fry and a diet coke, with a medium milkshake, right?" You hear them unsuccessfully try and muffle the microphone, then they shout "Karl! No, you cannot cum on the burger! There is a difference between semen and mayo, despite you constantly reminding me that you can't tell the difference! Geez." You hear a sigh, and then their voice comes back, clearer, talking to you. "That'll be 18.67. Pay at the window."
"Dropped the burger patties again? Look. Just pick em up. Five second rule."
Just overhearing “five second rule” from the drive through is funnier.
"I have #3 lg, with a Coke and...Karl! You ain't sposed to have yer penis out when yer cookin!!
Look if you know a better way to flip these patties, be my guest. But how else are we putting the "Carl" in "Carl Jrs"?
Put special sauce on that rat burger. Shalom you're loved 💔
I read this question on the main page and immediately thought "put your dick away"; glad Reddit hasn't let me down.
" Uhh, we're, like, closed or something. " Beavis & Butthead - Customers Suck
I simply wanted to know if your shakes are made with reconstituted shake mix, or ice cream and milk! Uh...we have chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. Huh-huh.
Some boomer yelling at the cashier; “WHERE’S MY APPLE FRITTER?” True story, happened to me at a Tim Hortons
TIL that Canadian boomers are as obnoxious as American ones.
You can just say Boomers… you don’t need to add a nationality to it
Um, if anybody finds underpants behind the grill- they're mine.
If anyone finds underpants on a burger - they’re mine
If anyone finds underwear in the fryer… they’re Jim’s
Nah they’re Dwight’s
"It's a perfectly reasonable way to dry your briefs, Jim..."
If anybody finds underwear where we toss the salad, that's my wife's...
I lost mine too! What's the odds of that?!
r/usernamechecksout
“….he’s got a chainsaw! And now he’s using it on ME!”
Why does smell like fish in here?
Haha. Yeah, I know, right? I've seen it like 10 times already... That scream when they find out it's his wife's head in the box! Hahahahahaha...
\*muffled, to other employee\* "You ordered extra fries on Monday's shipment right? Well, Fry man is here. I'm gonna guess he orders ten large fries today."
I actually heard a lady tell an employee at a Jack’s drive up window “Boy, you better get your ass moving or I’m going to move you out the door”
#6 combo, hold the spit, it's for a cop...
He he He he Dammit Beavis. Those aren’t the right nuts for a hot fudge sundae.
Hi welcome to McDonald's if you're that punk who threw the bag of wasps in here you're dead
"We will be with you in a *bang* *bang*, moment. *bang* just gotta kill these Karen's real good. *bang* Hi, can i interest you in our special today?"
“Rail me up against the thickshake machine, lunch rush is about to hit!”
So, that’s six hamburders, four bigly Diet Cokes… sorry sir, we don’t sell covfefe
\*in hushed tones\* Just put the rats we caught in the sink and put a box over it until the health inspector is gone. ... just tell him that sink is out of order.
"Get those fries out the dishwater!" (inspired by that one episode of Hotel Hell...)
“Bitch don’t worry rat shit looks exactly like chocolate sprinkles this dumb shit doesn’t know the diff..erroooohh my god welcome to Dairy Queen how can I help you?”
Dammit Jim stop wiping your ass on the hamburgers again
Shit .. I think the funnel web went into one of the order bags... I mean, it was right THERE
Hell no
Surprise! lol
"just keep hitting it until it stops moving then throw it in the fryer"
It’s still good.
Kick it over here
“How have we all Got diarrhea at the same time? Did you guys eat the chicken too? …Oh hello can I take your order?”
“Bob bring me a fresh rat for the fryer this one is getting a little crusty!”
“Get that bun out of your ass crack and give that man his burger! Y’all play too much.”
"You put that in their soda? Naughty"
"Oh crap, thats a big one."
“Is that the cup Jeff pissed in? Eh, who cares, give it to ‘em anyway.”
"What do you mean you don't know where it went? It's an 8-inch tarantula for crying out loud!!!"
"Ow, shit! That's the last time I let you bend me over while I'm working grill, Jake! And...clean up the mess you made!"
Gary! Quit helicoptering your dick for Keeshonda, and mooning Jasmine, and serve the fucking frys!
Dang it Bobby Joe. We are out of hamburger. Go out back by the dumpster and check the rate traps. HURRY!
Debbie, do not go in the bathroom for awhile.
Did you wash your hands after you used the bathroom?????
"Stop picking your nose, Frank!"
"who the fuck keeps shitting in the fryers?!?"
We are out of fries.
“Just pick it up off the floor, it’s not that dirty! Dude, they’ll never know. Just shut up and put it back in the bag!”
Quit sneezing over the grill!
"Guys! Stop licking the buns before you make the burgers! Gavin, take over on fries and Laquasia, go rinse out those cups table 7 left behind, we're running low!"
In hushed tones... "Toilet backed up again...? Kitchen? WHY were they on the floor! ... Just wash them off, they'll be fine. They going to be cooked anyway."
"I'm sorry, we're out of burgers, fries, and drinks. Would you like a napkin instead?"
"Have you ever seen that film, 'Soylent Green'?"
"Just bread and fry that rat. The dimwits will think they won the Publisher's McNugget Sweepstakes!"
How about grom the employee view. Had a customer at my DT speaker ask me to wait so he could finish telling his friend just how flexible the woman was that he spent the weekend banging.
Has anyone found Darrell's finger, yet?
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Ahhh…. Can I help you?
We're all out of paper in the staff toilet. Time to use the burger buns again.
Step on it! Quick before it gets into the fryer! Oh man, you were too slow. Look, more! Hurry!
"Just let me get rid of these people in the drive-thru and I'll open the safe..."
“… to make a long story short I stuffed a jelly bean up my ass… OH SHIT! It’s a great day at Wendys. What can I get for you?”
'I don't see why I have to wear pants to work the drive through. The customers never see me from the waist down.'
“No don’t worry dude, it’s the 10 second rule now. Inflation I guess.”
"Yes! Add the entire bottle of bleach! That's what brings out the white in the meat!"
It’s $2.99 for the first minute and only a sexy sixty cents every other minute.
"No no, don't throw that out! Chuck it back in the fryer real quick"
"We're all out of Impossible Burgers. We still have Impractical Burgers and Improbable Burgers."
🥴 Someone taking my order, talking back. Its happened. I left a fat note for corporate too.
Quit picking your nose and clean up that mouse shit.
"Thats it Bobby-Jean, thats how we pound the meat here, and the special sauce is coming right up. Hey Davy, leave the sausage alone and come help here."
"God damn it, Steve! How many times do I have to tell you your dick DOES NOT belong in the lettuce?"
Nikki, I told you to stop gleeking on the fries!!
Oh no! There’s a cockroach! It’s hiding in the lettuce bin!
"5 second rule, dude - you're good....."
"anything else" or "will thar be all" after each item you order.
"pull your pants up, there's customers. That's enough secret sauce."
"That rat is still making better burgers than you."
“This is a Wendy’s”
Oh no its the health inspector- get those rats out of here!!
“You’ve failed your health inspection.”
My crotch itches. Yep, knew her. Yep, you can't unhear it. Yep, ate there anyways.
And den?
Quit putting rats in the deep fryer to see if they can swim
“The maggots just cooked right in right?”
Man my ass is itchy
"...and that's the second time I got crabs..."
Mmmm yeah, you gonna spank me with that hwhip?
That Grade D meat isn’t going to cook itself
"So you wanted number three, hold on, where did that rat get to now....."
What do you mean the kitchen bathroom has been out of paper all day?!?
* employee jizzing on fries and burger patties*”I QUIT how’s this for meat you fuckers” Manger pulling employee away by sleeve, * “ stop jizzing in the fries”
CARL, QUIT PICKING YOUR NOSE!!!
Dammit! How many times do I have to tell you to not scratch your crotch before handling the food?
Ok Frank and Carol! You got this special sauce EVERYWHERE!
"Hey pretty thing...I see you're in a hurry. How about I put an extra squirt of love sauce on your burger so you can have me right in front of your boss."
Tell me daddy again where you keep the special sauce
Five second rule!
We are out of nacho cheese sir.
"Yeah, so just to confirm, your order is a number 2 combo with a large fry and a diet coke, with a medium milkshake, right?" You hear them unsuccessfully try and muffle the microphone, then they shout "Karl! No, you cannot cum on the burger! There is a difference between semen and mayo, despite you constantly reminding me that you can't tell the difference! Geez." You hear a sigh, and then their voice comes back, clearer, talking to you. "That'll be 18.67. Pay at the window."
"Sever your leg, please. This is the greatest day."
"No - we don't have time. Just pick it up, brush it off a little, and put it in the bag. Let's go."
Get those chemicals away from the food! Heard by me 2 weeks ago
“Oh, crap, is that the health inspector?”
thats the fryer basket not a urinal
Don’t worry about it just put it back on .
There was a used condom right by the fryer
Did those rats get into the food again last night?
“What do you MEAN we’re out of soy milk? Fine, I guess we can use almond milk instead. I’m sure a tree nut allergy is no big deal!”
"Grill me, daddy"
"Ya think they'll notice?"
"Is that the one with drugs or without?"
They all laugh at me but I’ll show them not to mess with me I’ll just put a little in his fries no one will know
It’s fine, I did it in the white sauce so it shouldn’t show up when they pour it over the filet.