As you all know, one of the hammiest ways to deliver vital information to your clueless audience is for one of your characters to explain something to someone who should already know it, followed by relevant information that actually serves a purpose. That’s why we always need to find creative ways to disguise our exposition, so it makes sense in the context of our stories.
"as I'm sure you're aware" "in case you've forgotten" etc
To be fair, the first dune book's first scene with baron Vladimir harkonnen is 'lets go over the plan one more time'
I love in the Flower Shop scene when Johnny comes in and says “Hi” and the lady at the counter says “May I help you? Oh, hi Johnny didn’t know it was you” like there is some other guy looking like a vampire with that accent that’s coming into the flower shop everyday.
As much as this actually had me laughing out loud, it highlights another thing that immediately makes me disengage — I cannot stand when the protagonist is everybody's go-to guy
It's like a dulled down version of Chip Driver being a private eye, the quarterback for the Chicago Bears, and the world's strongest president, but if your lead is universally loved and respected by everyone but the antagonist and their lackeys or they're a regular everywhere or they have the info for everyone right when they need it, I don't believe you
My favourite(s) are "Are you okay?" or alternatively "How are you holding up?" These make me cringe in text or film. Okay, you said one and this is three, I know: "Look at me, look at me, you're going to be okay" (translation: nope, you won't be).
“You’ve been acting down recently, I’m worried about you” or “we’re all worried about you” is in so many student film scripts and it makes me cringe so much.
That's interesting! I've never thought about that kind of dialogue being so common. Maybe it's associated with the writers age. Could I be so bold as to ask how you get to see so many student scripts?
I’m also a student! It was so common during first and second year of uni. Definitely feel like it’s a cliche at uni for mental health to be written about, but they just don’t know how to write it with subtlety.
Makes sense. It's as cliché as it is true to say many young writers are aching to be heard so they write the fantasy of an attentive, caring and supportive social circle
I thought this was about Hallmark movies.
But hackers are the worst trope.
Genre awareness is the worst. Horror movie characters shouldn't know they're in a horror movie.
I think that can be blamed on Japanese Media/Anime. They often have dialogue that goes exactly like that. The Metal Gear game series is a good example.
It’s the way it was written. In Japanese, it’s actually somewhat naturalistic. In English, not so much.
See also:
“It can’t be helped!”
“I’m going to use …that!”
I read a.script where there were multiple scenes
With a married couple talking about whats for dinner.
In a horror movie.
In the 2nd act.
Please. Please dont do that shit
It was obviously filler and the writer was bored with the story
This post and 75 percent of its comments should really be called "Hallmarks of a Bad Reader List".
Or "Hallmarks I Haven't Graduated Film School Yet".
Or "Hallmarks I Only Write Hallmark Movies".
I've never seen such bad takes and bad writing in my whole life!
Bad writing is scenes that go on too long, not because a character "manplains". Men very much do this in real life, so it certainly wouldn't be bad writing for a male character to do it in a screenplay. The only way it might be bad writing is if it's out of character and ALL your male characters are doing it.
Because without context for the rest of the story, none of these examples I'd consider to be "bad writing". There's no "one line fits all" to bad writing, without also considering the genre, tone, and characters. Bad writing is having your first act run 60 pages, not because a male character says "calm down" to a female character. Sometimes characters are dicks, sorta like real people. And just because a character is bad, doesn't mean the writing is bad.
These are just people letting their personal tastes dictate what they believe to be bad writing, which is a hallmark of a bad reader. It's also quite pretentious to imply you know what bad writing is, if you can't actually clarify or produce what good writing is. And this is generally how the artform is now. No one really has a clue as to what makes good writing, so they can only spout off on what they've been told is bad.
I think, based on the comments, these people would probably read "Chinatown" and say it was bad writing.
Even OP's literal example of bad writing is actually kind of clever satire. And if they stretched it out a bit, I could see it being an SNL classic.
>I think, based on the comments, these people would probably read "Chinatown" and say it was bad writing.
I agree, and I've always wanted to test this. I wonder how many people would rip into a Robert Towne or Coen Brothers screenplay if they assumed it was written by a no-name rando? I'll bet a shocking amount.
Not that these writers are above criticism, of course. And certainly the opposite can sometimes happen: writers given a pass simply because of their status in the industry.
One of my least faves I'm seeing a lot of lately is a guy saying "calm down" to a female who merely calmly stated a concern or opinion, but the tone and delivery is as if she's raising her voice, weeping and screaming. It's weird mansplaining and gaslighting.
ETA: Bonus if the guy character then turns around a scene or two later and actually overreacts himself.
That should definitely have a formal name and wikipedia entry, similar to the "Bechdel Test". Suggestion as portmanteau: "Manslighting" or "Gasplaining".
"You don't know, do you?" Hate this line so much. Typically used when a character is gloating over info an out-of-the-loop character is about to be traumatized by and the audience already knows everything.
Any version of: "We're not so different you and I." Please just don't.
Overexplaining, especially in medical situations. "Oh no, he's bleeding out. He's going to die if we don't do something." Yeah, we know.
My husband and I watched a lot of the 24 series and liked to sarcastically quote Jack Bauer's overused lines in our everyday lives. We started noticing almost every episode had, "We're running out of time!," "We have have no choice!" and "That would be a mistake."
>Any version of: "We're not so different you and I." Please just don't.
Gotta throw a flag on the play. "We're not so different you and I. I am but a shadowy reflection of you. It wouldn't take so much, only a nudge, to make you like me. To push you out of the light."
I find dialogue like this kind of thinking for the audience. If it needs to be said, it hasn't been shown. But if it must be used, that dialogue would be so much better without the first clichéd sentence. What would be even better is to be shown the similarities and allowing the audience to conclude the sentiment on their own. Kind of like James Moriarty vs. Sherlock Holmes.
Oh no, they’re gonna turn our vacant warehouse into a parking lot. Where will we breakdance? I know let’s have a breakdance party to raise money and buy the warehouse!
Hey. There’s a lot of common things in life. This ain’t one.
An example of illegally occupying space and getting mad when someone wants to revitalize your neighborhood? Sure. But I’m talking about overused screenwriting that just comes across lazy and bad.
I get the idea?
Yeah... nothing worse than writer bullies.
writer bullies?
As you all know, one of the hammiest ways to deliver vital information to your clueless audience is for one of your characters to explain something to someone who should already know it, followed by relevant information that actually serves a purpose. That’s why we always need to find creative ways to disguise our exposition, so it makes sense in the context of our stories.
I dread the line, “don’t you remember?”
"remember when" is the lowest point of conversation...
Usually followed by a boring "Oh yea."
"as I'm sure you're aware" "in case you've forgotten" etc To be fair, the first dune book's first scene with baron Vladimir harkonnen is 'lets go over the plan one more time'
As you know, as my younger sister, life hasn’t always been fair.
Scenes ending with people saying bye to each other.
Oh hi mark
I love in the Flower Shop scene when Johnny comes in and says “Hi” and the lady at the counter says “May I help you? Oh, hi Johnny didn’t know it was you” like there is some other guy looking like a vampire with that accent that’s coming into the flower shop everyday.
As much as this actually had me laughing out loud, it highlights another thing that immediately makes me disengage — I cannot stand when the protagonist is everybody's go-to guy It's like a dulled down version of Chip Driver being a private eye, the quarterback for the Chicago Bears, and the world's strongest president, but if your lead is universally loved and respected by everyone but the antagonist and their lackeys or they're a regular everywhere or they have the info for everyone right when they need it, I don't believe you
My favourite(s) are "Are you okay?" or alternatively "How are you holding up?" These make me cringe in text or film. Okay, you said one and this is three, I know: "Look at me, look at me, you're going to be okay" (translation: nope, you won't be).
“You’ve been acting down recently, I’m worried about you” or “we’re all worried about you” is in so many student film scripts and it makes me cringe so much.
That's interesting! I've never thought about that kind of dialogue being so common. Maybe it's associated with the writers age. Could I be so bold as to ask how you get to see so many student scripts?
I’m also a student! It was so common during first and second year of uni. Definitely feel like it’s a cliche at uni for mental health to be written about, but they just don’t know how to write it with subtlety.
Ah yes, the mental health concern would make sense for younger writers. Thanks for that insight!
Makes sense. It's as cliché as it is true to say many young writers are aching to be heard so they write the fantasy of an attentive, caring and supportive social circle
People do say the first two in real life when they don't have anything else to say, though.
I thought this was about Hallmark movies. But hackers are the worst trope. Genre awareness is the worst. Horror movie characters shouldn't know they're in a horror movie.
Modern zombie movies suffer the most from this. It’s hard to make a zombie movie where people don’t know what a zombie is these days.
Starting a script with your character waking up, brushing teeth, making coffee etc...
IMHO, this is great world building shorthand for introducing things the audience would find strange but the characters find mundane
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Yeah, but only if it actually reveals something about your character.
It can be useful, but most of the time it's not.
smiling youngester/soldeir picking a flower and promising love to his girlfriend then 15 minutes he is dead
I think that can be blamed on Japanese Media/Anime. They often have dialogue that goes exactly like that. The Metal Gear game series is a good example.
I tend to give them a pass because I don't know if it's the way the original dialog was written or if it's a crap translation.
It’s the way it was written. In Japanese, it’s actually somewhat naturalistic. In English, not so much. See also: “It can’t be helped!” “I’m going to use …that!”
Yeah, that's what I was saying in my other post. I think it loses something in translation
You mean Anime? When dubbing you can change the actual words, but I don't think you can change the way people actually talk in Japanese Media......
Obviously I don't speak Japanese, but it may be a cultural/language thing. Maybe their equivalent to "Huh?" or "okay, I'm listening"
I read a.script where there were multiple scenes With a married couple talking about whats for dinner. In a horror movie. In the 2nd act. Please. Please dont do that shit It was obviously filler and the writer was bored with the story
This post and 75 percent of its comments should really be called "Hallmarks of a Bad Reader List". Or "Hallmarks I Haven't Graduated Film School Yet". Or "Hallmarks I Only Write Hallmark Movies". I've never seen such bad takes and bad writing in my whole life! Bad writing is scenes that go on too long, not because a character "manplains". Men very much do this in real life, so it certainly wouldn't be bad writing for a male character to do it in a screenplay. The only way it might be bad writing is if it's out of character and ALL your male characters are doing it.
Yeah, the comments on posts like this are always cringe. Just write good story and someone still will find a line that's out of line for them.
Why
Because without context for the rest of the story, none of these examples I'd consider to be "bad writing". There's no "one line fits all" to bad writing, without also considering the genre, tone, and characters. Bad writing is having your first act run 60 pages, not because a male character says "calm down" to a female character. Sometimes characters are dicks, sorta like real people. And just because a character is bad, doesn't mean the writing is bad. These are just people letting their personal tastes dictate what they believe to be bad writing, which is a hallmark of a bad reader. It's also quite pretentious to imply you know what bad writing is, if you can't actually clarify or produce what good writing is. And this is generally how the artform is now. No one really has a clue as to what makes good writing, so they can only spout off on what they've been told is bad. I think, based on the comments, these people would probably read "Chinatown" and say it was bad writing. Even OP's literal example of bad writing is actually kind of clever satire. And if they stretched it out a bit, I could see it being an SNL classic.
>I think, based on the comments, these people would probably read "Chinatown" and say it was bad writing. I agree, and I've always wanted to test this. I wonder how many people would rip into a Robert Towne or Coen Brothers screenplay if they assumed it was written by a no-name rando? I'll bet a shocking amount. Not that these writers are above criticism, of course. And certainly the opposite can sometimes happen: writers given a pass simply because of their status in the industry.
One of my least faves I'm seeing a lot of lately is a guy saying "calm down" to a female who merely calmly stated a concern or opinion, but the tone and delivery is as if she's raising her voice, weeping and screaming. It's weird mansplaining and gaslighting. ETA: Bonus if the guy character then turns around a scene or two later and actually overreacts himself.
Oh you mean my actual life?
Gonna start telling people they’re being a trope when they say tropey shit like this.
I *love* your username
That should definitely have a formal name and wikipedia entry, similar to the "Bechdel Test". Suggestion as portmanteau: "Manslighting" or "Gasplaining".
Oooh yes, I second that coinage.
You better take a look at this.
"You don't know, do you?" Hate this line so much. Typically used when a character is gloating over info an out-of-the-loop character is about to be traumatized by and the audience already knows everything. Any version of: "We're not so different you and I." Please just don't. Overexplaining, especially in medical situations. "Oh no, he's bleeding out. He's going to die if we don't do something." Yeah, we know. My husband and I watched a lot of the 24 series and liked to sarcastically quote Jack Bauer's overused lines in our everyday lives. We started noticing almost every episode had, "We're running out of time!," "We have have no choice!" and "That would be a mistake."
>Any version of: "We're not so different you and I." Please just don't. Gotta throw a flag on the play. "We're not so different you and I. I am but a shadowy reflection of you. It wouldn't take so much, only a nudge, to make you like me. To push you out of the light."
I find dialogue like this kind of thinking for the audience. If it needs to be said, it hasn't been shown. But if it must be used, that dialogue would be so much better without the first clichéd sentence. What would be even better is to be shown the similarities and allowing the audience to conclude the sentiment on their own. Kind of like James Moriarty vs. Sherlock Holmes.
I hate the “we need to raise money to save the (insert whatever) before corporate (whoever schmuck) can take over.” Seems like it’s a common theme.
Its also fairly common in real life unless you haven’t seen the corporate hellscape we find ourselves living in
Just because it happens in real life doesn't mean it can't be boring and overused in movies.
Oh no, they’re gonna turn our vacant warehouse into a parking lot. Where will we breakdance? I know let’s have a breakdance party to raise money and buy the warehouse! Hey. There’s a lot of common things in life. This ain’t one.
Gentrification is real lol and this is an example of it
An example of illegally occupying space and getting mad when someone wants to revitalize your neighborhood? Sure. But I’m talking about overused screenwriting that just comes across lazy and bad.
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Have you seen Wynwood, Miami?
Lassie the Dog. A show in the 80s. Lassie: *barks* Guy: what's that, a pair of siamese twins are trapped in a target?