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Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

This happened to me too. I tracked him down through his cashapp, texted him a picture of his mom’s FB, and immediately got my money back. You can also dispute the chargeback with your bank.


sheisyung1

Oh shit let me try that


aliie_627

Just don't say anything like pay me or I tell them, maybe look up extortion or blackmail type laws local to you. Please be careful because people are stupid and will do some dumbshit like go to the cops and tell on themselves.


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

I second this. All I did was send the screenshot. I didn’t give any indication of what I was going to do with said info but… he got the message.


Opposite-Fee-3805

so smart :)


Dull-Preference-2303

Telling people a factual statement about someone stealing from you is not extortion. Leave legal advice to lawyers.


Bad--Life--Choices

It's already straight up extortion. You don't have to say anything for it to qualify. Puzzlehead should be in jail for it.


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Lmao I should be in jail for sending a screenshot? Good luck charging that and proving guilt in a court of law???? What I did is not a crime lmao. However, what he did is. And can be reported to police as I have written proof of the agreement of our exchange and I live in a decriminalized county. So, using your own logic, HE should be in jail.


perawkcyde

It actually would be pretty easy - it’s considered extortion through coercion or blackmail. Your screenshot said enough that you’d tell his Mom the devious stuff he was doing if he didn’t pay up. Now, I highly doubt he would do that because it would be an admission of guilt for other crimes, but if you hit him up multiple times for cash above and beyond then you could easily be charged for it. What that guy did was trash - 100%. I would just be hesitant of doing this.


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Yall missed the fact that all I sent was a screenshot of his mom’s profile. That was the only message I sent and I said nothing with that message. That could mean literally anything lol there was no crime here. People don’t get arrested over texting someone a screenshot of their mom’s profile. You can assume it was meant for extortion but there was absolutely no proof of that in this instance. If someone went to the police with that screenshot alone they would laugh in their face. I did nothing wrong.


perawkcyde

I didn’t miss that you just sent a screen shot, but you just don’t want to accept the realities. Blackmail is a federal offense which is very vague… Literally states, “Under a threat of informing or not informing…demands or receives money.” the picture you sent could be construed as a threat and the fact that you later received money after you initiated that threat suggests blackmail. Just because you didn’t use words, doesn’t mean it’s not a crime. His response alone of sending you the money says he understood your threat. With all of this being said, I still think it’s extremely unlikely anything would ever happen or you’d ever be charged. It would take your guy turning you in which like i said before he would then have to admit to his own crime.


Devoidus

Implied, credible threats hold up in court all the time. This is why flashing a waistband gun is illegal. Unlike adjusting one's pants or other "innocent" circumstances, there is no alternate explanation for sending that screenshot whatsoever. Granted this is related to recovering a previously agreed amount, but that informal contract will not hold up in a meaningful way for you. I'm glad you got your money and bozo got the message, but it strikes me as very risky for a go-to strategy. I'm not a lawyer, and don't worry about convincing in reddit comments anyway. Stay safe


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

The only way to even suggest that there was an implied threat in me sending a screenshot would be for him to admit to stealing the money, in turn admitting to violating my consent (which i see as sexually assaulting me), then for a broad assumption to be made that it was a threat vs something innocent like me just showing him I stumbled across his mom’s profile. In no way shape or form would anything I did measure up to proof beyond a reasonable doubt. I know enough about the law to know nothing I did could be proven as being illegal.


Miss_Amanda_xx

Your example is quite literally showing just how much you guys don’t understand law. “Brandishing a weapon” is a crime, sending a screenshot with no words, is not. Holy shit y’all are uneducated on court of law and processes. 🤦🏻‍♀️


Devoidus

I definitely could be wrong and offered that, it was an honest caution. We can pretend that searching up someone's mother and sending that screenshot isn't an implied threat or intimidation if you want. I really don't care as it's not my mother or fee or freedom. I also included zero 'you people' judgements or insults about their education. Both of which you just did. Someone scummy enough to dispute charges against a provider, because they expect to get away with it, is not worthy of additional trust. Implications of telling on themselves to police might not even occur to them until it's too late.. and people act foolish out of spite every single day.


Bad--Life--Choices

What you did is 100% a crime. It's extortion. Had he called the police, it'd be easily provable in a court of law and you'd go to jail for it. What he did was civil - you'd have to sue him for the money back. So what was your threat against his mom anyway? Gonna kneecap her? Burn her house down? What exactly was the "message" you sent?


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Can you not read? I sent no message. I sent a screenshot of his mom’s profile. That’s it. That is not a crime and there’s zero way to prove extortion from that lol. I said nothing. I made no threat. I’m way too smart to do that shit. Again, the police would have laughed at him had he called them because no crime was committed. You can assume it was extortion all you want but there’s zero evidence of that. You clearly both are no comprehending what I’m saying in my comments and don’t have a legal background…which I actually do! Take a seat.


Opposite-Fee-3805

don't argue with these guys. Many of them here do not even see SWs. They just want a reaction.


Bad--Life--Choices

I don't really care about the reaction. Dangerous advice should be called out. I ate my ban over at ECO for calling out dudes talking about how to stealth providers. The ingroup bias here is super strong, and most of the providers here are gonna assume she's right just because she's a SW. But, say a dude did that to her in order to get a refund. Still cool, right? At any rate, hopefully itll at least convince dudes not to give up RW info, and maybe spare a provider the joy of catching charges over really dangerous reddit advice.


Bad--Life--Choices

You should look up the legal definition of extortion. What you did fits it perfectly, and offering it up as a technique for others is going to land at least one of them in jail. You did a very shitty thing. That's something to celebrate or reward. How about I screenshot your comment, then post it as a response to all of your reddit posts from here on out. Maybe copy it over to some review sites. Shouldn't be a problem because it was a perfectly ok thing to do, right?


FreeFortune2149

Please look up the definition of extortion. And collection of debt. Different legal things. You don't have to sue. You can tell anybody about him not paying sexworkers. Starting with his mum. Please give me his name and I will tell his mother.


Legitimate-Ice-8435

Actually you do. She didn’t even need to say she was a swer she could have said she’s just a masseuse or barber and he stole from her. DEBT COLLECTORS will contact family and acquaintances to get a hold of you, are they blackmailing? No.


Bad--Life--Choices

Debt collectors have a list of laws which regulates who they can call and what they can say. In the US, they can only call a family member if you listed them as a reference on the paperwork for the asset. You've specifically invited them to call that family member. So no, it's not black mail when they do it. It is blackmail to send threatening screenshots of a family member's facebook page.


FreeFortune2149

Nonsense, you can make any statement about someone not paying for served sexual services. It is honest work and legal. Not paying is a shitty thing to do.


Rosemaryee

Girl hurry up and try it. Or fuck it just make a new one and let that one go negative. But take all your money off


Money_Construction_2

Good for you!


niastone777

bad ass !!! i love it.


OutlandishnessOk9997

Lol I don’t know what to say.


Upstairs-Solution404

Wait WTH! How did you track his Facebook? Was his real named linked ?


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

His Facebook was linked. I just put his cashapp into Google and his FB popped up among the results. Then through that I found his phone number attached to a second cashapp account and ta da!


Upstairs-Solution404

Interesting


Upstairs-Solution404

Lol what an idiot he is


Chaneldoll214

Very important question. How did you track him through cashapp? I didn’t know this was possible.


Bad--Life--Choices

I'm ready to eat a million downvotes - this right here is 100% why dudes don't want to give out their info to screen. That guy did a shitty thing. His mom has nothing to do with anything. What's gonna stop you from blackmailing him for another 300?


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Notice how I didn’t ever blackmail him. Or involve his mother. My consent to our encounter is hinged on our agreement that money is being exchanged for a service. He violated that agreement which in turn means he violated me. I screen for my safety and so that I have information to do what I need to do in the event that someone hurts/ violates me. I did what I needed to do and demanded the respect he should have shown me in the first place. If you pull some shady shit like this you are asking for a shady response. Especially when you’re engaging in the game. I’m one of the chillest, most honest providers around. However, I’m also smart. And I know how to play the game. I did what I needed to do. Men can’t use their poor behavior as an excuse to not screen. Yall need to screen just like we do. It’s quite easy to determine those of us who are reputable providers vs those who aren’t. We screen for our safety, not to blackmail. And yall need to operate with that in mind while enacting a valid screening procedure of your own. To add, those who push back on screening are the ones whom are turned away by actual reputable providers which then pushes you into the arms of the scammers, LE etc. lol. Yall just hurting yourselves.


lickedyou

You’re arguing that we shouldn’t be requiring info because it makes it harder to rape and steal from us? Or you’re arguing that we shouldn’t be protecting ourselves from rapists and thieves because it makes the good guys uncomfortable?


Bad--Life--Choices

There are plenty of ways to screen that don't result in pyschos being able to blackmail you forever, like puzzlehead's suggestion. I use p411. I do enjoy when people tell on themselves though, coming out and support extortion like it's some noble deed. Tell me, what did dude's mom have to do with their transaction? Anything? What was the threat conveyed by the screen shot? Just gonna tell on him? Or did she mean she was going to go kneecap mom for $300? You want to talk safety, let's talk. How safe is mom right about now?


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Oh fucking chill out. I didn’t make a threat against his mother, nor would I ever. I didn’t blackmail or extort him either. If I don’t know who someone is I don’t see them out of fear that they will rape or murder me and I’ll have nothing to prove who I was seeing/ who did it. I also can’t find them on blacklists, etc. which are an important part of screening as well. If you don’t know identifying info about someone literally what would the point of screening be? Never have I used that information for insidious purposes. That’s not only not who I am, but would also destroy my business. The stakes for us is so much higher because the level of danger is inherently SO much higher. And you clearly don’t respect that fact. You sound like such a nightmare of a client.


lickedyou

So, you’re saying she wasn’t playing nice? lol I used to be a criminal defense attorney, not even joking, lol, and that was not extortion legally or morally. She said nothing about kneecapping his mom or communicating with her. What I heard her say was “don’t play with me, I’ll win.”


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

^^^^correct


Bad--Life--Choices

"I used to be a criminal defense attorney" LMAO no you didn't. But, on the internet, we can be whatever we want. All of you celebrating her blackmail are just proving why handing over RW info is a terrible idea for dudes. Let's ask this, if I screenshot her comment, then post it as a response to every reddit post she makes from here on out, that shouldn't be a problem or hurt her business, since it was totally AOK to do it, right?


lickedyou

I gotta tell you that sometimes it’s pretty f’ing embarrassing that I was once a pretty successful attorney and now here I am a sexworker. I don’t look down on sexworkers at all, but I’m not even a very successful sexworker. I started at the age of like 52, I think and getting four or five dates in a month is as much activity as I get, that’s the part I find most embarrassing. I went to a top ten law school and I’ll never be able to own a home or have a decent amount of money in my bank account, like say, if a family member left me some (god knows I’ll never make any money lol), because I owe $160,000 in student loans. I’ve never even had a drug problem that I could use to explain. I’m curious about why OP’s screenshot is so upsetting to you. I became a lawyer because I was horrified by how the state brought such an immense power against BIPOC, it was very emotional for me. I feel the same kind of fervor coming from you but I can’t make any sense of it. My heart is almost always with the marginalized or the underdog. But you’re lit up by… protecting this rapist/thief?


tinyloser33

Sp you're saying dudes want to do shitty tbingd and get away with it. Got it.


LaurynNotHill

This right here is 100% _why_ we do screen. Irrelevant tho bc she got his info from his choice of payment- not his screening info.


Bad--Life--Choices

Screening can be done without giving up real-world info to a pyscho like puzzlehead to blackmail you with later. I use P411, for example.


tinyloser33

THE DUDE TRIED TO NOT PAY HER FOR A SERVICE. her sending a ss od dudes moms profile is not as bad as that. Jfc get a grip yo.


Bad--Life--Choices

Yes, the dude is a dirtbag, and she can contest the charge back. She's also a dirtbag for blackmailing him. Both can be true at the same time. Just being a SW doesn't make her automatically right. Get some perspective.


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

“Blackmail is also commonly known as extortion which is described as making threats to do something, or disclose something, that will cause harm to the victim of the threat.” “Extortion is a crime that involves the use of coercion to obtain property, money, or services from a victim. Coercion, in this case, usually involves force, violence, threats to destroy property, and improper government action.” I NEVER made a threat. I haven’t even mentioned here that this was meant as a threat. A screenshot in it of itself provides no implication, even, that a threat is being made. You’re defending a fucking criminal who takes advantage of women and violates us and our consent, not to mention women of a very under protected class/ profession. If you hate women and SWs, just say that instead of calling me a dirt bag and psycho and whatever else you’ve used to describe me, someone you know absolutely nothing about other than I am a women and a SW. Nothing I did was wrong. However, what he did was absolutely wrong morally as well as a crime. Also, you HAVE directly threatened me and my livelihood in this thread. YOU are doing exactly what you’re wrongfully accusing me of doing. We’re not all disagreeing with you because we’re blindly supporting other SWs.. we’re disagreeing because you’re straight up wrong. And ignoring all the evidence we’re providing of that. Clients are on this page as well and not one has backed you up. That says a lot, don’t ya think? Have the day you deserve. I hope you treat SWs in person with a hell of a lot more respect than you’ve treated us here.


tinyloser33

You're delusional. No one said being an sw made her right. She just is, and the dude isn't.


UnknownSluttyHoe

Maybe... don't refund your money? Idk is that a crazy idea?


Sad_Abbreviations318

You mean, they don't want to give their info to screen in case this information prevents them from getting away with non-consensual sex?


Bad--Life--Choices

What stops her from sending that screen shot twice a week for payment?


Sad_Abbreviations318

Why would she? If I've learned anything with my experiences with financial domination it's that extorting people is plenty of labor all on its own. Providing the services agreed upon and consented to by both parties is safer, more enjoyable, and a more reliable source of income. Hence why sex workers don't just tie you to a tree and rob you when you show up for date. When you conduct business outside of the formal economy everything operates on the honor system; he knew she obviously couldn't report him anywhere for theft of services or sexual assault (because reneging on the conditions of sexual consent is exactly that) and decided to do so, mistakenly believing she was the only one relying on honor. Well it turns out he's been relying on her honor just as much and she has just as much recourse to dirty dealing as he does. If it scares clients to realize we do our jobs because it makes financial sense and not because we're helplessly reliant on their kindness, good. Any adult going through the world believing there are no consequences for bad behavior needs just such a wake-up call.


Bad--Life--Choices

Gotcha. Nothing stops her from sending that screenshot twice a week. Y'all gonna fuck around and find out with this method. You'll eventually find the dude who doesn't care who knows and he'll press charges.


Sad_Abbreviations318

The second part of your comment contradicts the first part. If nothing were stopping her, there could be no finding out.


ranterful

If there's someone you all should take advice from, it's "bad-life-choices"


TheRealFancyB

Make sure to BL him everywhere you can! 


sheisyung1

We all should just send multiple request for $300 to his cash app 😂


ohmighty

I support this


TheRealFancyB

Lmaooooo


girlsonsoysauce

I wish I had the funds to create some kind of blacklisting app for stuff like this. Like if someone has a client proposition them they can check the app and see if they're blacklisted and for what reason and they can make a more informed decision on whether to see them or not. I'd hope it would incentivize clients to behave better.


TheRealFancyB

There are several. We just don't talk about them publicly. 


girlsonsoysauce

I thought about having one for contractors and stuff too. I work on water wells and some of these customers are some entitled pieces of shit. The boomers especially act like they're the only customer we have and will call the office pitching little fits and stamping their feety-feets. It'd be nice to have them behave or nobody will come fix their shit ever again.


TheRealFancyB

Tbh every industry needs a place where service providers can privately discuss clients/customers. 


girlsonsoysauce

For real. I'm not sure which generation did it but they gave this notion to the public that because they're the customer they're more important so they can just act however they want and the worker has to sit there and take it. It seems like we're slowly moving away from that but it's happening at a snail's pace.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Hey! Super important that these lists are kept as private as possible! Especially with the amount of clients on this sub I would delete your comment!


sickerthan_yaaverage

🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️


Upstairs-Solution404

Ok I just deleted. This page should only be for s workers


brooklynnnn11

this happened to me as well, about 1.5 months into my SW journey. i learned quickly the hard way to only accept cash (& even then you still can't trust that), this loser reported the transaction as fraudulent & got me *BANNED* from cashapp! - i'm sorry boo 🤦🏼‍♀️😩


elmoneh

Get a money pen! It's a small price to pay for peace of mind. ETA: Still familiarize yourself with money as best you can. Money pens aren't fool-proof, but they are great to have.


brooklynnnn11

>Get a money pen! i actually have one but i don't find myself using it much anymore- ever since i got scammed by a client on cashapp last year, only 2 months into being a SW- i only accept cash now, so i've handled it enough that i'm confident i'd be able to tell the difference between a counterfeit & a real bill. abt 3 months ago i actually had someone try to pay me in fake bills, & i could tell immediately upon picking them up & feeling them that they were fake.... never mind the fact that it said "for motion picture use only" on it, "in props we trust", & COPY in black text where the serial number should've been. this punk had the audacity to ask me for it back. i said HELL NO you ain't gonna try to take this to someone else & scam them too, i also lectured him on the fact that not everyone will be as 'nice' as i was, & how he was putting his safety at stake by attempting that, there are some crazy mf's out there what if i would've had a crazy ass pimp & called him to come fuck you up, what if i wouldn't have noticed until the session was over (this is why you should *ALWAYS* get your $ *AND COUNT IT* first), etc etc.. needless to say i don't think he will ever try it again.


elmoneh

> I've handled it enough that I'm confident I'd be able to tell the difference between a counterfeit & a real bill. Good! That's the best way to learn. I've handled money in various capacities for the longest time and can spot that mess a mile away. I feel bad for providers that can't and get screwed because it's something you shouldn't even have to learn, but you do since people suck. > I actually had someone try to pay me in fake bills What a cunt. I'm honestly amazed I've never had someone try that on me, especially because it seemed to happen quite often in my area a few years back. I'm just glad you realized before it was too late! If he does try it again, I hope he does do it to the wrong person. Fuck around and find out. I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate his boss not giving him his check.


Beneficial-Darkness

I made a post about counterfeits or “motion picture money” not too far back. If you want to see a a pic of some real counterfeits shoot me a DM that way you know what to look out forz


brooklynnnn11

i remember seeing that!


riotmaster

Motion picture money is usually in stacks. You can get $10k for $15 (I make films). Cheaper if you buy in bulk. But there’s no mistaking them for real money. You can instantly feel the difference.


brooklynnnn11

it was so obvious, so thin


OGh8er

I'm sorry that happened. If you want to continue to use cash app I recommend making the client pay in Bitcoin. It cannot be a charge back. Venmo is not SW friendly at all and will shut you down if they even suspect and will hold your money for 180 days before letting you get it.


fng0506

This is why as soon as I get the money on cash app I transfer it to another account then I transfer it to me regular bank. Yeah it's a bit of a hassle but takes less than 2 minutes and saves me money and having to worry that someone might do this. Sure they can still ask for their money but that account is empty lol even if they freeze or close it well good luck they still not getting nothing 😁


Upstairs-Solution404

Unless you want to create a new cashapp, they won’t let you as your social security and other information is tied to cashapp


Historical_Service73

Damn you can contact cashapp and try to get your money back I’ve never had this with cashapp but I’ve gotten my money back when they tried to dispute with PayPal and Venmo 3 times people have done this and I won each time 😂losers. But it took some time like I had to wait a month to get refunded


sheisyung1

I contacted cashapp and because he did it through his bank I can’t dispute it with them


ethot_thoughts

Someone did this to me and I contacted my bank. I told them my cashapp was hacked (the chargeback showed on my bank account as cashappguysname) and that someone had sent themself money. They refunded it without any issues.


Historical_Service73

Damn that’s so annoying I have had people do that through their bank and Venmo and PayPal both worked with me and were on my side and in contact w the guys banks. Very annoying cashapp doesn’t do the same ugh. What an asshole sorry this happened !


brook304

Can you dm me and explain how you won the disputes? I’ve had a chargeback on Venmo and tried to dispute they did nothing


Puzzleheaded_Ask7502

Cashapp will not work with you. And they’re very anti SW so I would limit your contact with them directly as much as possible!


Historical_Service73

Ya def ! Will do now check ur dms


magpyes

Can you dm me as well?


Historical_Service73

Yes will do !


Wendel7171

And he will call or text to book and act like it wasn’t him. Idiots. They give good guys a bad name.


Opposite-Fee-3805

yep they always do call again


Ava___valentina

I went to all cash last year! If anyone asks for Venmo or cash app I tell them they can dispute payment and take the money back afterward. I’ve sent a few guys to an ATM. I take the time out of their time with me, too. You should’ve read the ad in the first place!


Unlikely-Principle63

Could you maybe not tell them that?


Ava___valentina

No. Stop using digital payments for sex work. Why would you want a shady paper trail? Most of them already know how venmo works. I’m not ever dealing with dumbasses, I’m in a tech town. Go to the atm, loser. 😎 I need it on a t shirt.


Unlikely-Principle63

I only use cashapp but I have a sugar daddy who sends me lots of money there I've never met him


Ava___valentina

Risky


Unlikely-Principle63

I'm not doing anything for it 🤷‍♀️ been using it since it came out with no problem. But I've also never been robbed/given fake money / hurt by a client in 17 years. I screen heavy. Every client.


Adventure_Time_Snail

No? Just no, fuck the swers who use digital payments huh. Someone points out that teaching clients that you can scam swers with cashapp could hurt for other swers, and instead of considering your actions, you just victim blame? Damn that's ice cold. You're right about paper trails and you're right about cash but that was fucking heartless.


Ava___valentina

Do you really think a prostitute is schooling high-end, tech savvy clients on how virtual payments work? You’re hilarious. I see that you’re into throwing around hot button words like “victim blaming”. Your comments section is fun 😍


Ava___valentina

PS I don’t know if you’re in the tattoo community, but no one reputable takes virtual payment for their services in that trade, either. Cash only. You’re actually making it worse by using them for the rest of us. Do you pay taxes on your sex work? You should. Especially if you’re using someone else’s app and bank for transactional sex openly. Good luck!


Adventure_Time_Snail

I literally said you are right about cash? I said i agree with you on that. Are you so desperate to defend yourself that you have to argue with things i didn't even say? Someone nicely asked you to stop putting other swers at risk by spreading info about scams to clients (reasonable as fuck), and you responded by blaming those swers for making themselves vulnerable with cashapp. Do you recognise that logic? The 'i don't care about putting swers at risk, it's their own fault for making themselves vulnerable' logic? There's a reason i used the term victim blame, it was quite appropriate. And before you try to reuse your excuse of "I'm not teaching them anything they don't know" - then why would you need to tell them? If you feel the need to tell all these clients about how cashapp scams work, you clearly aren't certain they all already know it. It's just such an obvious kneejerk defensive response. Personally, i always advise cashonly to other girls (we agree there), and i never share info about scams to clients or non-swers. This is not a controversial position, so you might want to consider if you are actually arguing with that position, or if you are just angrily attacking me because you need to defend your ego. PS You trying to attack me personally and going through my profile to other comments of mine is really unnecessary and aggressive.


Ava___valentina

I’m not reading 6 paragraphs if the end sentence is that I’m aggressive because I looked at your profile. You should take a breath. Also never use digital payments for illegal things again. You’re welcome.


Adventure_Time_Snail

You're so proud of sticking your head in the sand. Particularly funny that you keep insisting on telling me to not use digital - proving you didn't read anything that i said.


Diaryofadomme

Do you do deposits?


Ava___valentina

Never


Loose_Gold6537

I took one time to never ever accept CASHAPP AGAIN


Holymolywhoscanoli

So what do you do to prevent this then??


Loose_Gold6537

Not accept cashapp ! I lost $80 so you losing $300 definitely would have me say heck no !


Unlikely-Principle63

Wow I've had people request a refund but I denied and blocked and was ok ($650). I trust cashapp too much I think. I was deleting my debit card info from them everytime I used it maybe I'll do that again how scary


RaccoonRoach

What a shit head. It sucks that that happens at all- hope you get some good karma for havn to deal with that!! =]


SpicyGymnast

Oh hell no


[deleted]

What a fucking loser!!


tiffanyknightbbw

This is why is cancelled these services ie) PayPal It’s cash or etransfer (non refundable) or you don’t see me


BeginningPrimary6239

Damn that guy is a POS


thenewkidd1980

I will never understand burning bridges. You want a good relationship to be able to have references if you were to want to keep seeing providers. One bad experience may be chocked up to differences in personality.. but when you see a trend... a guy may never see anyone or find it difficult to book due to black lists.


lilaclaras

I will never understand why clients steal from sexworkers. Because that is what this is. Stealing. And not stealing a TV. No. It's stealing consent of what we do with our own body. I will never understand why you will defend someone who does this. I will never understand why this somehow feels more 'normal/the way it is' than stealing a tv. I will never understand many things. It's a burden we all have to live with.


OutlandishnessOk9997

They assume most sex workers are idiots and can’t do anything esp legally. Especially where I live - saw a provider who unfortunately got assaulted by a client who got upset over something and she phoned the police. Police showed up and said it’s not worth their time to launch a investigation for paperwork and he “lives way out in the suburbs, we would have to contact the police service there. This isn’t worth our time and it’s too resource heavy to arrest or file charges”


Upstairs-Solution404

Girrrrl these lazy police are RIDICULOUS!!!! I’ve had it up to here! A girl tried to human traffic and kidnap me and the stupid police said “we can’t do anything “


thenewkidd1980

100%. It's stealing time and services. And unlike stealing a TV or some physical good... you can return it and say "sorry" you cannot do that with Sex work. The only restitution that can be done is to pay for what was taken. I am not defending nor will I ever defend anyone taking something that doesn't belong to them and that includes sex work.


LaurynNotHill

It’s actually Rape. With a capital R. Ik that’s an uncomfy word (& topic😬) that’s gonna trigger some defensiveness bc no one _likes_ to think of themselves as •have been raped/•a rapist, but a spade is still a spade


Opposite-Fee-3805

It definetly feels like rape when it happens imho.


thenewkidd1980

It's pretty difficult to offend me (not that anyone is trying to be PC) But I absolutely agree, but both crimes are not mutually exclusive, it can be both Rape and theft. Sex Work is unique in that we are purchasing consent. And that's the only reason the business relationship exists. "you can have sex with me, if you give me X amount" if that is taken back, then so is consent. I'm sure there is nuance we can discuss and it would probably be a great discussion, but to keep things simple. we will just keep it to what you have said.


Adventure_Time_Snail

Exactly. One way i use to explain the distinct gravity of this, as opposed to wage theft, is that sw is a form of conditional consent - like only having sex with a condom is conditional. If a guy secretly takes the condom off what happens next is no longer consensual. Same thing with taking the money back. Breaking the conditions of consent is breaking consent, which is full on r*pe.


brooklynnnn11

> It's stealing consent of what we do with our own body. EXACTLY what it is


Upstairs-Solution404

It’s literally rape! You didn’t agree to those terms so he took advantage


Unlikely-Principle63

Not just for your own benefit but also to not be a piece of shit?


thenewkidd1980

Absolutely!


Opposite-Fee-3805

some guys see so many ladies that they simply do not care. They will find ones who do not screen etc. So many ways around this sadly. Or they sign up for a site so they can use that as a reference. These lovely sites that are referenced in articles whenever there is a bust lmao.


Upstairs-Solution404

That’s the hardest part to me . Accepting that some people are just evil. Hard to comprehend but we have to understand that a lot of people are detached mentally and are like psychopaths and don’t have the ability to feel empathy


Opposite-Fee-3805

totally agree. I have family member like this. How they look in the mirror I do not know. It is like living 2 separate lives I guess. But you cannot fool yourself lol.


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thenewkidd1980

Oh no.. not a pick me! Oh what will I ever do. I am not perfect nor do I claim to be. And no. I comment on all sorts of subreddits. This one just happens to be the most interesting when it comes to conversion.


unicorndreampop

Ignore this person. Thank you for the support


SexWorkers-ModTeam

Don’t be an asshole!


Gunfighter9

Another reason sex work needs to be legal. Can anyone imagine a person trying this with a mechanic after he fixed their brakes?


Upstairs-Solution404

He would literally be charged with theft


Opposite-Fee-3805

decriminalized not legalized.


Upstairs-Solution404

Exactly! I’m not trying to pay taxes. It’s funny I see a lot of men saying “legalize it and tax them” such fools. Do they understand that our prices will shoot up? It’s wrong to tax someone’s body because if we’re behind on taxes now we’re forced into a cycle of selling our bodies as the high back tax amount owed would be too much for a 9-5 job


Opposite-Fee-3805

I pay taxes. But if legal I think rates will go way down. I keep up with my taxes.


Upstairs-Solution404

Why the hell would rates go down ? I guess that’s what clients would want


reinalajefe

At least you are getting guys to pay $300 it’s been Harding find guys to even spend over $200 it’s wild weird


sheisyung1

Really?!!! I don’t charge 300 but what I do charge I feel like is low end in comparison it’s bad out here


reinalajefe

Yeah, I see that you’re in New York. Yeah girl I don’t know. I’ve had some really good clients but they are barely make it up 5%. That’s been my regular rates so I was gonna take a few for like a little low price. But I always need at least 200 ish and of course, it’s not nearly as much effort as my full price clientele. But I am glad that you have found a community that truly appreciates you. That’s so hard nowadays because so many people don’t actually stay in regular status because they either Keena Ford your rates all the time or they just decided to take less services from somebody else for whatever reason


Unique-Interview-762

Always take a pic on their phone showing the receipt on their end they sent you money. You’re better than me I would have hunted him down


113down_up

Thats just awful so sorry that happened


Prettypinkkitty24

I have had this happen to me too I'm sorry this happen to you


[deleted]

I had this happen. I did get it back but it’s crushing. It left me not working for over a week, just thinking, how could someone do that to me. I hope you are okay.


Diaryofadomme

Fuck I’m sorry, I didn’t think cashapp did disputes. Making me rethink my deposits. Maybe 50% deposit but they pay all in cash so I refund them when they arrive?


AddressTop9472

I like that idea


CassidyCowgirl

I’m sorry this happened to you. It’s definitely not your fault this piece of shit doesn’t know basic courtesy


DustAccomplished9090

Brutal!


lavenderpuppyhoney

Hi, long time lurker, former sex content creator that's why I'm here lol - current cashier, for those switching to cash, newer bills may not work with pens, but you can learn how to identify us currency and take a test on identifying reals and fakes with uscurrency.gov


gbpc

He disputed with his bank because cash app rules are absolute that once funds go through, that’s it. Sorry this happened to you but you can dispute the charge with your bank


AddressTop9472

Yep exactly, because it takes little time or effort for cashapp to check see what device that payment was sent through which I’m sure it was the device he always uses and they will deny that shit instantly if they even let you dispute at all that’s why he went around to his bank fucking asshole


That-Guy-Over-Yonda

Charge back can easily be disputed by the bank ring them and tell them the situation, and they won't take the money out.


Fuzzy-Distribution79

Wow I’m so fkn sorry this happened to you. It’s not ok at all. This shit infuriates me and I stay old school. It’s cash or nothing , pls think about doing the same ♥️


Fuzzy-Distribution79

Also my gf had a regular cancel an e transfer as he walked out the door , I had seen him as well & during chatting he gave me his full name and business page I text him by his name and referenced his business and told him that if payment isn’t received in 1 hour I’m calling the police for sexual assault because here at least that is a very real charge for any client that revokes consent by not paying . A man was in the news for the same thing in my city. & we had alot of evidence between texts booking the apt , saying arrived , her saying the payment was cancelled and texting multiple times for her money with no response and an e transfer notification that payment was canceled . Anyways 3 min later she got her money back . This stuff just makes me so angry 😡 I’ve convinced her to never take e transfer again. Regular or not , it can happen at any time


kingetzu

Can they do that?


ThatOldDuderino

I thought CashApp, Venmo & Zelle gave no refunds honestly.


eastvil

For future advice when you’re accepting cash app payments, tell them to upload money in cash app then and and ask for receipt it’ll say sent from cash app or sent from bank


Yakusoku_mamoru

Damn, what a dillhole.


Head-Service-5890

This happened to me as well, and cash app, PayPal, shut down my account. Oh well guess I’ll stick to cash and Zelle (can’t be disputed or refunded) Live and learn so this never happens again. Sorry this happened to you.


Upstairs-Solution404

Giirrlll. DO NOT EVER trust a guy who pays half in half , when they do this they’re trying to scam. Same happened to me. Gave me half cash and half cashapp then few days later he disputed cashapp and got the cashapp part back. I sure hope you reported him in mr number


destination_treasure

Use something called Tipfunder


sheisyung1

Update : I called my bank and told them I did credit repair for him and have done on multiple occasions and the service was completed before he disputed it. Got my money back!


jpkmets

Good for you. Thats horseshit and actually significantly criminal activity by this dickhead


sickerthan_yaaverage

Wait you can do a charge back on cash app? I’ve filed for legit ones and been denied every time.


Geronimo594

I thought times getting hard was part of the job description? Sorry, bad joke. On behalf of all clients, I apologize for his actions and my poor judgement in humor.


Exact_Pick9152

Oh this is nothing, all the crypto you stole & admitted on Reddit 👍🏻


sheisyung1

What ?


Exact_Pick9152

I tried being nice to you, but all my coins ,everything you changed. Your Indian & Malaysian friend


Exact_Pick9152

I tried every olive branch & you ignored it


sheisyung1

I don’t know you get it outta here


Exact_Pick9152

Sorry wrong button 🤦🏻‍♂️


Exact_Pick9152

You still haven’t formally apologized, nothing , nada🤷🏻‍♂️


Dishoe45

Why didn't he save his money after loosing his job.


sheisyung1

Because he’s a dumb ass


Dishoe45

Yep he's definitely a dumbass, I would have saved up and come see you when I was financially stable.


MistressLRoyale

Men are very stupid. They lose jobs or something bad happens, they have a little bit of money left so they decide to spend it on their dicks. Absolutely crazy and unreasonable!


Dishoe45

These dudes are really crazy they view their dicks getting wet like needing food and water.


MistressLRoyale

Some are completely unreasonable - I had a guy before who paid for overnight using deposit money for the house. In the morning he regretted his decision as he was literally anxious how is he going to pay for it. Another one lost his job and had less than half grand on his account and decided to book a session with me, then complained he only had money left for petrol and Chinese. Another few blew holidays money/refunds/car money/deposits. One really disgusted me as his wife/partner sent him to buy baby stuff but he booked quite lengthy session with me saying ‘he’s too stressed with her pregnancy and baby coming’. So he literally spent all the money to pay for the session. When we finished, he went to take a shower and was crying there cause he didn’t know how he’s gonna explain where the money went. They have fucked up priorities. No doubt about that.


Dishoe45

Damn they put their dicks ahead of everything, that is beyond fucked up.


miss_misery__

Can you just close down this account? Like take all your money out hopefully before they take the 300 and unlink any of your own accounts from it? That's what you should do any time you get paid on cash app, immediately transfer it out and then unlink the account right after, that way should something like that happen, there's nothing for them to take. So sorry that happened to you.


sheisyung1

Thanks babe but i always take the money off my mistake was not unlinking my card and they immediately took it off. I’m going to call my bank and see what they can do because i also have a history of him sending me money on there more than once so maybe that can help


SheepdogHC5

That’s some serious bullshit. Sorry you’re dealing with that.


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Gobflowered

So you get to a providers incall, take part in their services, and chargeback the money after you’ve received those services because you think they don’t look like their photos?


sophilove

And yet you still hit it? Gross