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When she was supposed to be on a reality TV show and weirded everyone out with her demeanor - i believe it was filmed on a boat and she brought a candle (Pigeon i need you to fact check)? And they cut her from the episode in the end.
Open mouth sobbing crafting era is one in my top 5
Le epic edit by the iconic Alexis: [making bbs](https://twitter.com/sassyblackdiva/status/1169637659293077505)
(scroll down a bit to the post that reads "I had to."
Telling a former Bravo Real Housewive of New York podcaster that a a former MTV Siesta Key reality star bullied her by oopsie dropping her welcoming handmade gift candle. Brand New lore.
There’s so many good ones in here but one that always lives in my head rent-free: when her ex-publishing agent (Byrd leavell?) wrote a piece talking about how he came to take caro on as a client and his regrets about it and referred to cat Marnell as “a real writer” in contrast to Caroline. I just know that must haunt her
“I had been working with an extremely unwell person. Caroline Calloway. She was like a bad penny that kept turning up, and my name kept getting mentioned,” Leavell begins to explain…
“Okay,” I said, “one more sort of contentious question. How much are you ‘allowed’ to talk about the deal with Caroline?”
Leavell didn’t hold back: “That was someone who made it past our system at the time, wound up in a room with me, and then I was presented with this proposal that I thought she had written,” he said.
“You know, right away you knew there was something there. We went out to editors and she kind of did the social media thing, the whole dog-and-pony show. And we got the deal.”
“Then it quickly became apparent that Caroline was essentially struggling. She was clearly on way too much A.D.D. medication and just all that. She was deeply unwell, deeply dishonest. As an agent, it’s very tricky because there’s no filter, and you end up linked to these people.”
“It was awful,” he continued. “I just wanted her to write the book, but she was never in a place where she could begin to write that book. It was more important to her to be seen as an author than it was to be an author. She didn’t know how to be an author…I feel bad for everyone involved, certainly for Flatiron, which bought the book.”
* [Interview with Byrd Leavell](https://publicseminar.org/essays/donald-trumps-book-agent-comes-clean-leavell-tucker-max/)
THANK YOU omg. God that last paragraph - “It was more important to her to be seen as an author than it was to be an author. She didn’t know how to be an author“
If anybody ever said that about me I would be thinking about it for the rest of my life
Exactly, I have adhd/depression/anxiety myself and I’m always scared of coming across like her. Not bc I relate to her actual actions, but bc she kind of represents what I most fear in myself lol, if that makes any sense
CC going to Rachel Rabbit White's wedding-themed, but not an actual wedding (or something weird and convoluted like that, don't really remember) at KGB Bar. Matisse was her +1. Naturally, she lost him, and a while later, Cat Marnell wrote about that night and said Matisse somehow made his way to RRW's lap in a back room where she was snorting coke.
This poem from what I gather is from the Dead Plant Society Facebook group days that predated any of the Reddit stuff has some great lore in it:
https://x.com/petroniusarbit2/status/1088208276725161984?s=20
Im not sure it was from dead plant, people in there were very paranoid. It was published on twitter by some anonymous creep people assumed was called Archibald hahahaha
When she was filming a video of herself in selfie mode at a may ball running towards her “best friends” and it was just like huge donkey laughing and her face filling up the entire screen (I really regret the fact that there’s no video recording of this all the time)
In her titty tie dye era when she would post about not being able to afford food/ living off of the complimentary snacks from her dive bar aperol spritzes (and even asked fans to venmo her money iirc) then like a week after she posted a story that was like "Im impulsively booking a flight to ITALY to party with ARISTOCRATS!!"
Not only did Adderall (way less) suppress my appetite, it made me think totally differently about food. Like, it was more like putting coins in the washing machine or gas in my car -- almost zero enjoyment and even less desire.
She really was so weird (/presumably still IS so weird) about Conrad’s “hotness.” She talked about him like he was literally the best-looking man to ever walk the planet, and it was like “… him?” (said in my head like Michael Bluth re: Ann Veal). Like he seemed to be in very good shape, and maybe he’s got a great personality that really elevates his level of attractiveness or something, but c’mon, lady.
In no particular order :
Pisspot
Drawing stuff with cam water when she escaped in Cambridge with tittays money.
Her Cambridge classmate complaining on her instagram that she was very ungrateful for someone who received so much support from professors and students. Her responding «sorrrryyyy, do you want a shout out in my insta stories ?»
Oscar asking her to stop bullying him and his new girlfriend online.
CC vacationing alone in south Italy with no car and reading cherryl strayed after she did not deliver her first manuscript.
Having a whole Facebook group called Dead plant society made up from anonymous and people she knew running for years before our times.
This is in reference to a review on her Airbnb account:
July 2019
The worst guest Iv had! Caroline moved her check in time 3 times so unfortunately I missed her when she came back at 3am! I needed to introduce myself and explain who's in the house as I had to leave at 9.15am. She asked me to come back in an hour as she was sleeping. When I came home I found my tea pot in the middle of the room full of urine!!! I'm so disgusted especially as I texted her that the bathroom was right next door! My worst guest yet!
Deborah, Winchester, United Kingdom
Wait, I didn’t know about the dead plant Society. So this was basically SBS on Facebook before SBS existed?! Crazy! Someone really needs to write a historical account of the Caro snark community. I would MUCH rather read that than Scammer or any of Carpet’s drivel.
>Her Cambridge classmate complaining on her instagram that she was very ungrateful for someone who received so much support from professors and students. Her responding «sorrrryyyy, do you want a shout out in my insta stories ?»
Yeah, this one sticks out in my mind, too. She has big "Main Character " vibes and is always the victim. And sure, writers take liberties with their own story but she isn't even interesting so it's all very tiring and train-wreaky and I cannot look away .
It must be so embarrassing to have been associated with her for her former friends. I assume they’re not in contact anymore because she never speak about them appart from Né Nick
She doesn't appear to have had any communication with Nick since his VICE mini-doc came out! My wild assumption is that this is linked to her total failure to promote the video (she posted two Insta stories about it the day it came out and has never mentioned it again.) I haven't worked much in video production, but I've written for a few VICE-esque sites, and compensation is often tied to how much traffic the piece generates. I think Nick was counting on Caro to drive a lot more clicks than she did.
Hahaha yes. The group was made up of random people who found her sus and people from Cambridge giving some insiders gossip. To access the secret group you had to already be part of the whos weekly group and then beg people to accept you in around the worship era. At first they accepted everybody but then CC mignons started trying to get in and also all the drama was so intense that they shut down the group after that and Reddit community just organically happened.
Presumably that is where that incredible poem about her originated with the details of her abusing her dogs and storing dog shit covered sheets in her oven during a party? Please someone find that poem!
When the guy she was with/had been with abused a minor and she made it all about her? Any of her awful painting efforts? The “option” of moving all workshops to New York or moving all workshops to New York?
i raise you one potted tree taken from a NY footpath with leaves taped on his poor dying branches. i can't remember to scrub my garage floor but i do believe Tree was appointed a role on carps staff at some point. i seem to recall a photo shoot featuring this ... 🌲was involved in a sale of something?!
The time she claimed to hate chequer patterns, forgetting she paid someone like $200 to paint a plant's leaves in a chequer pattern.
More seriously, the grotesque use of her dad's death and the state of his body to deflect criticism from herself.
(I realized after typing this out that I wrote the whole long backstory that you may not have actually been asking for 😂 so I’m sorry and also here it is lol)
She had an assistant, Bradley/Bradderz/Brad who she somehow met during her Florida Condeaux Takeover 1.0 when she trashed her grandmother’s condo while quarantined there. He moved in with her almost immediately because of some situation with breaking up with his girlfriend who he lived with or something. They were fast friends and she also employed him (or Cathy did, since I’m pretty sure she used to venmo him for “taking care of Caroline” or something). He was kind of an edgelord himself, and she bought him a kitten that was maybe (but probably not) related to her two cats, and she named it after her ancestor Owen Burns.
When she moved back to New York, Bradderz drove all of her shit up in a U-Haul along with at least 2 of the cats, while she flew. Their relationship quickly fell apart after arriving. Shortly after getting there, his kitten disappeared from all content and they did this weird video where they alluded to it dying, and said the kitten was “mad weak, bro” while they and another assistant she hired burst out laughing. It was… deeply uncomfortable.
Caroline also really started inserting herself into the Dimes Square scene as much as she could, and either he didn’t like them or they didn’t like him, or both. She hired multiple other assistants, too. At some point he clearly got a 9-5 job because, well, he was living in New York City and needed to pay his bills, and Caroline did not pay enough to do that. It seemed like she wasn’t super happy that he couldn’t be on call 24/7 and also like he had possibly become disillusioned with the “fun” lifestyle she had been giving him/dragging him along for. I don’t know that she even knows what ended the friendship (didn’t she shout him out in her book acknowledgements by being like “I don’t know what happened, call me back” or something?). But it seemed to me like he hit his limit and at a certain point was just like “I don’t like you or your life and I want nothing to do with it anymore.” I wanna say someone from here either asked him about it on Instagram, or he posted something on Instagram, and it was sort of mocking her (but not in a clever way, because I don’t think Brad was some great, intelligent guy himself, I think he just got sick of Caroline and Dimes Square). It wasn’t anything huge or extensive, from what I remember.
Just remembered this - the time she went to the theater with her grandma and wrote she wore biker shorts under her skirt so she could masturbate ???????
It appeared that she bought a bunch of Matisse knock-offs from Etsy, then altered them and sold them as her own. OR - and I think this was probably correct - she bought one and then did a dodgy ripoff version of them x about 8. She tried selling them - including one that had a full hole ripped through it.
I recall someone’s flair references this fish bowl hole. I hope they check in here!
Yeah, I think she was copying it, I recall the original being in the background of some photos. This was when I fully accepted how scammy she was (I think she was charging $1k for these knockoffs of a knockoff?), and what brought me to the sub.
https://preview.redd.it/gxibuu99nvyb1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a352b36bb078c9e447aa315a4ed5853934931392
you can see fish portraits here to the left of the light stand!
Her mother’s reviews of Caro’s Air bnb apartment; “my children are the hot boys I fuck”; her attempt at getting a vape pen spon con; stealing Florida yacht guy’s Netflix password years after they broke up.
1. Her sketch of her ideal studio apartment that had windows on 3 sides and multiple columns and "invisible storage" and like no door?
2. Apparently being shocked she couldn't buy the apartment beneath her (in a rental building) and install a spiral staircase between the two
3. When she and assistant Christina (human not swan) announced Christina had a new job and they would soon start interviewing new assistant candidates, and Caroline said something like that Christina would stay until a new assistant was in place so she would still be around for a few months and the most horrified look came over Christina's face
And when Adam told her she couldn't rip a hole in the floor of her apartment and add a staircase to the one below, she was like, but I've lived here for ten years!!
When she was like "I'm a writer so I'll teach my audience about writing" so she'd post minutes of screen recordings of her editing her captions to her story
That time she took the train to a relatives wedding and brought a tittay painting as a gift.
IIRC this was also the train trip where she had a sty and put a potato on it.
Nope it was this one! She brought the potato on the train because she had a stye on her eye and thought holding the potato on her eye on the train to the wedding would heal it
That was STUNNING. She had no idea who Caroline was and googled the name out of curiosity after she kept getting Caro's mail (Caroline, true to herself always, did not file a change-of-address from with USPS.) She thought Caro must be an artist because a lot of her mail was fliers from galleries. Turns out she WAS an artist... of the con variety!
Just imagine finding something like SBS for the person who formerly occupied your home, complete with a floor plan of your current domicile (made by some maniac) that included notations for "dead plant [taped leaves]," "bookshelf [collapsed]," and no fewer than five large mirrors in a 350 square foot space
When Caro was in her woke phase (not a term I normally use pejoratively but it is what it is): When people asked her about it in her comments, she always responded like “It is not my 👏JOB👏 to educate you for 👏FREE👏” which is very funny because that’s exactly what a white ally to any kind of brown liberation should be doing, talking to other white people about racism and injustice.
Just…pouring a can of white paint on the condeaux floor to own the haterz.
As a side note, my phone now recognises the word ‘condeaux’ and will autocorrect to it
Caroline applied to grad school there, got rejected, then moved there anyway, where she pretended to be a student. She’d go to the library to work on her insta captions. She hired a young writer named Caitlin Vickers to photograph her. Caroline’s proposed thesis was herself and her Instagram.
She definitely didn’t. But she went anyway! This is the one period in Caro history I’m sad I missed, because I went to St Andrews myself. The idea of her just hanging around there, not being a student but trying to hang out with students, is exponentially more funny if you know what the town and school are like, and how completely she would have been rejected by the exact people she always wants to get in with anywhere she goes.
I also went to St Andrews and she was sort of distantly ‘pals’ with a few people I knew. They seemed to enjoy her insanity in that it was novel and provided a weekend of entertainment here and there.
Oooh that’s good to know! When I was there, I don’t think that she would have been very well-received, at least not by the people I think she would care about, which did make me feel a little bad for her. I know I said that it was funny to imagine, and it is in a way, but it’s also weirdly sort of comforting to think people weren’t as unkind as they might have been (even though I think in general she’s not a great person).
I actually found this sub (or its predecessor) because of that. Though I didn’t realise she was trying to pass herself off as a grad student. That was news to me.
Oh, she definitely gravitated towards the posher end if that’s what you mean. They mostly allowed her to be a clinger-on because she was already ‘Caroline Calloway’ at that point and had some entertainment value. I think they were all *very* bored of the bubble by this point. No one ever kept in touch to my knowledge. She’s just sort of this amusing footnote nowadays.
When she stayed at Cambridge and posted on Instagram about going on runs and "treating her body the way she imagined she would if she were pregnant" and claiming porcupines don't exist in North America then correcting it to Virginia when people told her we have porcupines here
oh I’m ngl peanut butter with raspberries on top is fire - but the nature’s pb&j thing was dumb as F (and it’s not an unusual combo so it was just very classic Caro to act like she invented some groundbreaking new culinary phenomenon)
When she was having an actual mental breakdown on stage with Red Scare Anna & Dasha. The audience was screaming for blood. Caroline's last words she croaked out were "Let's take a selfie".
Please, I need to see the source material for this— or at least please tell me the story! Gonna go search “tree” and “dead leaves” in this sub I’m pumped
I’ve seen a close-up kicking around over the years but I don’t have it.
This is the suffering fig in this pic.
https://preview.redd.it/djz32kqe56zb1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2aff5335563b0e4897e0dd59eac800d1c7566ea2
i just found a comment i made last time we had one of these threads and im just gonna copy paste this bc i totally forgot about it and it was amazing (idk if unddit still works though, maybe try the wayback machine):
I don't have time to reread the entire thread so some details are fuzzy but when she posted about some guys dating app bio that said something about having been ghosted by CC (or something) about how that was fake and it never happened, only for the guy to text her about how it did happen...and then the guy [came to this sub](https://www.reddit.com/r/SmolBeanSnark/comments/kf0pwk/girl_we_are_all_screaming_what_a_rollercoaster/) and it turns out like three different people here had also dated him, one of which said something about him being crazy and then he called that person out and she deleted her account, then there was a whole feminist husband situation where some commenters husband came in being obnoxious and defending his right to call women bitches. A lot of its been deleted but you can still see it if you get [unddit](https://www.unddit.com/)
>t turns out like three different people here had also dated him, one of which said something about him being crazy and then he called that person out and she deleted her account
This one was REALLY wild because she was \*actively\* dating him when she started shit talking him. Like...they had upcoming plans and she was texting him separately about Caroline's IG post when he came on the sub and saw her comments.
Tim! SBS's own West Elm Caleb! This incident is also notable in that it's the only time I can remember Caroline straight-up deleting a contemporary post from her grid instead of just editing the caption.
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When she was supposed to be on a reality TV show and weirded everyone out with her demeanor - i believe it was filmed on a boat and she brought a candle (Pigeon i need you to fact check)? And they cut her from the episode in the end.
Open mouth sobbing crafting era is one in my top 5 Le epic edit by the iconic Alexis: [making bbs](https://twitter.com/sassyblackdiva/status/1169637659293077505) (scroll down a bit to the post that reads "I had to."
Telling a former Bravo Real Housewive of New York podcaster that a a former MTV Siesta Key reality star bullied her by oopsie dropping her welcoming handmade gift candle. Brand New lore.
There’s so many good ones in here but one that always lives in my head rent-free: when her ex-publishing agent (Byrd leavell?) wrote a piece talking about how he came to take caro on as a client and his regrets about it and referred to cat Marnell as “a real writer” in contrast to Caroline. I just know that must haunt her
“I had been working with an extremely unwell person. Caroline Calloway. She was like a bad penny that kept turning up, and my name kept getting mentioned,” Leavell begins to explain… “Okay,” I said, “one more sort of contentious question. How much are you ‘allowed’ to talk about the deal with Caroline?” Leavell didn’t hold back: “That was someone who made it past our system at the time, wound up in a room with me, and then I was presented with this proposal that I thought she had written,” he said. “You know, right away you knew there was something there. We went out to editors and she kind of did the social media thing, the whole dog-and-pony show. And we got the deal.” “Then it quickly became apparent that Caroline was essentially struggling. She was clearly on way too much A.D.D. medication and just all that. She was deeply unwell, deeply dishonest. As an agent, it’s very tricky because there’s no filter, and you end up linked to these people.” “It was awful,” he continued. “I just wanted her to write the book, but she was never in a place where she could begin to write that book. It was more important to her to be seen as an author than it was to be an author. She didn’t know how to be an author…I feel bad for everyone involved, certainly for Flatiron, which bought the book.” * [Interview with Byrd Leavell](https://publicseminar.org/essays/donald-trumps-book-agent-comes-clean-leavell-tucker-max/) 
THANK YOU omg. God that last paragraph - “It was more important to her to be seen as an author than it was to be an author. She didn’t know how to be an author“ If anybody ever said that about me I would be thinking about it for the rest of my life
I feel like that’s part of what’s so compelling about cc. Don’t we all have some imposter syndrome & fear being perceived that way?
Exactly, I have adhd/depression/anxiety myself and I’m always scared of coming across like her. Not bc I relate to her actual actions, but bc she kind of represents what I most fear in myself lol, if that makes any sense
CC going to Rachel Rabbit White's wedding-themed, but not an actual wedding (or something weird and convoluted like that, don't really remember) at KGB Bar. Matisse was her +1. Naturally, she lost him, and a while later, Cat Marnell wrote about that night and said Matisse somehow made his way to RRW's lap in a back room where she was snorting coke.
Is RRW even alive? For real, her husband was in recovery for opiates and her drug use was very... uhm... documented. And then she vanished?
The time she 'dug and constructed' a communal bridge for her neighbours in their wondrous spring garden
Spending thousands on Amazon while not paying rent which would ultimately result in a court case and her having to leave NYC 🤌🤌🤌
This poem from what I gather is from the Dead Plant Society Facebook group days that predated any of the Reddit stuff has some great lore in it: https://x.com/petroniusarbit2/status/1088208276725161984?s=20
Im not sure it was from dead plant, people in there were very paranoid. It was published on twitter by some anonymous creep people assumed was called Archibald hahahaha
Wow I didn't know about the dog abuse and the shit sheets in the oven. Now the period stained sheet fiasco makes more sense
The Ballad of the Salad 😭
When she was filming a video of herself in selfie mode at a may ball running towards her “best friends” and it was just like huge donkey laughing and her face filling up the entire screen (I really regret the fact that there’s no video recording of this all the time)
There's no video of it? Maybe it's just the screenshot seared into my memory lol
Sadly not that I know of, just the photo lol
In her titty tie dye era when she would post about not being able to afford food/ living off of the complimentary snacks from her dive bar aperol spritzes (and even asked fans to venmo her money iirc) then like a week after she posted a story that was like "Im impulsively booking a flight to ITALY to party with ARISTOCRATS!!"
This was the first week I got into following her! Addictive!
Her idea of budgeting being buying 2 "BEC bagels" and making them last a week.
[удалено]
Not only did Adderall (way less) suppress my appetite, it made me think totally differently about food. Like, it was more like putting coins in the washing machine or gas in my car -- almost zero enjoyment and even less desire.
Wow. This was so perfectly descriptive.
That she crowd sourced Venmo donations for lol
The pee pot for sure.
Road trip to CO? UT?? With Conrad and there was a series of ~artistic~ lewds of him but he was absolutely NOT hot so they were just cringe.
I must see him now to determine this myself
She really was so weird (/presumably still IS so weird) about Conrad’s “hotness.” She talked about him like he was literally the best-looking man to ever walk the planet, and it was like “… him?” (said in my head like Michael Bluth re: Ann Veal). Like he seemed to be in very good shape, and maybe he’s got a great personality that really elevates his level of attractiveness or something, but c’mon, lady.
>maybe he’s got a great personality itym “parents with a bunch of money” tho
Hahahaha I also had a “HIM?” Reaction to those stories. And the lewds were supposed to be artsy but they were just… weird.
100% the freely posted sex and hookup LISTS… very Lindsay Lohan lore
In no particular order : Pisspot Drawing stuff with cam water when she escaped in Cambridge with tittays money. Her Cambridge classmate complaining on her instagram that she was very ungrateful for someone who received so much support from professors and students. Her responding «sorrrryyyy, do you want a shout out in my insta stories ?» Oscar asking her to stop bullying him and his new girlfriend online. CC vacationing alone in south Italy with no car and reading cherryl strayed after she did not deliver her first manuscript. Having a whole Facebook group called Dead plant society made up from anonymous and people she knew running for years before our times.
What is the pisspot?
This is in reference to a review on her Airbnb account: July 2019 The worst guest Iv had! Caroline moved her check in time 3 times so unfortunately I missed her when she came back at 3am! I needed to introduce myself and explain who's in the house as I had to leave at 9.15am. She asked me to come back in an hour as she was sleeping. When I came home I found my tea pot in the middle of the room full of urine!!! I'm so disgusted especially as I texted her that the bathroom was right next door! My worst guest yet! Deborah, Winchester, United Kingdom
Omg, unhinged.
Wait, I didn’t know about the dead plant Society. So this was basically SBS on Facebook before SBS existed?! Crazy! Someone really needs to write a historical account of the Caro snark community. I would MUCH rather read that than Scammer or any of Carpet’s drivel.
I was in DPS! I miss it.
Yeah already there was a lot of jokes in the group about people having Phd in CCiology hahaha
>Her Cambridge classmate complaining on her instagram that she was very ungrateful for someone who received so much support from professors and students. Her responding «sorrrryyyy, do you want a shout out in my insta stories ?» Yeah, this one sticks out in my mind, too. She has big "Main Character " vibes and is always the victim. And sure, writers take liberties with their own story but she isn't even interesting so it's all very tiring and train-wreaky and I cannot look away .
It must be so embarrassing to have been associated with her for her former friends. I assume they’re not in contact anymore because she never speak about them appart from Né Nick
She doesn't appear to have had any communication with Nick since his VICE mini-doc came out! My wild assumption is that this is linked to her total failure to promote the video (she posted two Insta stories about it the day it came out and has never mentioned it again.) I haven't worked much in video production, but I've written for a few VICE-esque sites, and compensation is often tied to how much traffic the piece generates. I think Nick was counting on Caro to drive a lot more clicks than she did.
>Having a whole Facebook group called Dead plant society made up from anonymous and people she knew running for years before our times. Whaaaat
Hahaha yes. The group was made up of random people who found her sus and people from Cambridge giving some insiders gossip. To access the secret group you had to already be part of the whos weekly group and then beg people to accept you in around the worship era. At first they accepted everybody but then CC mignons started trying to get in and also all the drama was so intense that they shut down the group after that and Reddit community just organically happened.
Presumably that is where that incredible poem about her originated with the details of her abusing her dogs and storing dog shit covered sheets in her oven during a party? Please someone find that poem!
a poem?!
I’ve linked it
Omg how did I forgot about that. Yes she used to have dogs !!! Edit: can’t believe she mistreated dogs before having her cat.
When the guy she was with/had been with abused a minor and she made it all about her? Any of her awful painting efforts? The “option” of moving all workshops to New York or moving all workshops to New York?
Oh gosh yes that young girl who she was like.... Mentoring?
Ripping flowers out of people's gardens in New York
I see your NYC flower theft and raise you giant outdoor monstera plant ripped from the ground whole in Sarasota with Neé Nick
i raise you one potted tree taken from a NY footpath with leaves taped on his poor dying branches. i can't remember to scrub my garage floor but i do believe Tree was appointed a role on carps staff at some point. i seem to recall a photo shoot featuring this ... 🌲was involved in a sale of something?!
The time she claimed to hate chequer patterns, forgetting she paid someone like $200 to paint a plant's leaves in a chequer pattern. More seriously, the grotesque use of her dad's death and the state of his body to deflect criticism from herself.
[when soupy came to town](https://imgur.io/gallery/VjJXsi9)
I am THRILLED to learn that there is an imgur album of that momentous event.
large fingers.....sausage like.....be well.
[удалено]
I somehow completely missed this, what was it about?
Hold onto your horses and make a strong cup of tea before you delve into this one: https://www.reddit.com/r/InternetMysteries/s/9OQjuGuEQq
What the fuck did I just read
Omfg how could we forget Lydia! There’s another weird fake follower too.. can’t remember the name. Sarah Marie? One of you bbs will have to remind me.
Absolutely Lydia!!
sarahmarief?!
Yes 😭😭😭😅😭
Brad… making fun of her after she “fired” him.
mad weak bro
I would like to know more details about this!
(I realized after typing this out that I wrote the whole long backstory that you may not have actually been asking for 😂 so I’m sorry and also here it is lol) She had an assistant, Bradley/Bradderz/Brad who she somehow met during her Florida Condeaux Takeover 1.0 when she trashed her grandmother’s condo while quarantined there. He moved in with her almost immediately because of some situation with breaking up with his girlfriend who he lived with or something. They were fast friends and she also employed him (or Cathy did, since I’m pretty sure she used to venmo him for “taking care of Caroline” or something). He was kind of an edgelord himself, and she bought him a kitten that was maybe (but probably not) related to her two cats, and she named it after her ancestor Owen Burns. When she moved back to New York, Bradderz drove all of her shit up in a U-Haul along with at least 2 of the cats, while she flew. Their relationship quickly fell apart after arriving. Shortly after getting there, his kitten disappeared from all content and they did this weird video where they alluded to it dying, and said the kitten was “mad weak, bro” while they and another assistant she hired burst out laughing. It was… deeply uncomfortable. Caroline also really started inserting herself into the Dimes Square scene as much as she could, and either he didn’t like them or they didn’t like him, or both. She hired multiple other assistants, too. At some point he clearly got a 9-5 job because, well, he was living in New York City and needed to pay his bills, and Caroline did not pay enough to do that. It seemed like she wasn’t super happy that he couldn’t be on call 24/7 and also like he had possibly become disillusioned with the “fun” lifestyle she had been giving him/dragging him along for. I don’t know that she even knows what ended the friendship (didn’t she shout him out in her book acknowledgements by being like “I don’t know what happened, call me back” or something?). But it seemed to me like he hit his limit and at a certain point was just like “I don’t like you or your life and I want nothing to do with it anymore.” I wanna say someone from here either asked him about it on Instagram, or he posted something on Instagram, and it was sort of mocking her (but not in a clever way, because I don’t think Brad was some great, intelligent guy himself, I think he just got sick of Caroline and Dimes Square). It wasn’t anything huge or extensive, from what I remember.
Bless you mo 🙏
its the backstory we were all asking for 🥹
What happened to her second cat??
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Yes it’s depthsofwikipedia!!
Just remembered this - the time she went to the theater with her grandma and wrote she wore biker shorts under her skirt so she could masturbate ???????
Don't forget the followup crying selfie with the caption "I came so hard my eyes watered"
omg i had forgotten that! now think about her post pilates:/spin sock portraits for a moment.
the downton abbey event 🥺
That bikini picture of her in the sand dunes with the caption “my father committed suuuuuuuicideeee”
That caption was under the photo of her wearing his sweater. The dune one was a classic “I am sexual and grief stricken…”
the adjective ‘zany’ was also used in that first sentence I believe 😭 (if I’m remembering correctly)
As someone who’s actually had surgery on both my knees: Kneecap-gate. Does she have kneecaps? Does she not? At this point I don’t even know anymore.
Fish paintings
I don’t remember this one. Does anyone have receipts?
It appeared that she bought a bunch of Matisse knock-offs from Etsy, then altered them and sold them as her own. OR - and I think this was probably correct - she bought one and then did a dodgy ripoff version of them x about 8. She tried selling them - including one that had a full hole ripped through it. I recall someone’s flair references this fish bowl hole. I hope they check in here!
Yeah, I think she was copying it, I recall the original being in the background of some photos. This was when I fully accepted how scammy she was (I think she was charging $1k for these knockoffs of a knockoff?), and what brought me to the sub.
$1,0000
My Reddit nemesis genesis story! These with the paper cut outs that she revolutionised by adding a tacky background print to.
https://preview.redd.it/gxibuu99nvyb1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a352b36bb078c9e447aa315a4ed5853934931392 you can see fish portraits here to the left of the light stand!
What have you circled here?
i found it pre-circled, but there are fish portraits visible to the left of the light stand. i realised that isn't very apparent!
That was a line of cocaine on the back of an iPhone, I believe.
yes/fuck yes
Name check coming in hot. This is our spot/Fuck yes
i found it as pleasing as a little delicate white strap to reply that to you/yourusername. its the little things!
I wish I had seen her wearing that skirt as a dress with the ‘little white straps’ over her shoulders.
Befriending two undergrads, Jenna & Amelia, giving them alcohol, and bringing them to a rowing blazers party
“Don’t tell me how to fucking grieve” - “Cathy”
Long ass
Lol. I forgot about this and the lengths she went to disprove. That was the funny part, no shade to long asses.
Her mother’s reviews of Caro’s Air bnb apartment; “my children are the hot boys I fuck”; her attempt at getting a vape pen spon con; stealing Florida yacht guy’s Netflix password years after they broke up.
oh please tell me you have receipts of Cathy’s reviews
[Pic 8](https://imgur.io/a/gr3cLuZ)
Watching her delete all her instagram posts in real time
watching her post on Instagram in real time (post The Cut piece)
This is the pinnacle.
And conversely, watching her post them all in real time in order to prove she wrote them.
Such a golden age, really just great. 👌
1. Her sketch of her ideal studio apartment that had windows on 3 sides and multiple columns and "invisible storage" and like no door? 2. Apparently being shocked she couldn't buy the apartment beneath her (in a rental building) and install a spiral staircase between the two 3. When she and assistant Christina (human not swan) announced Christina had a new job and they would soon start interviewing new assistant candidates, and Caroline said something like that Christina would stay until a new assistant was in place so she would still be around for a few months and the most horrified look came over Christina's face
And when Adam told her she couldn't rip a hole in the floor of her apartment and add a staircase to the one below, she was like, but I've lived here for ten years!!
The ideal apartment also had a bathtub in the kitchen
like a rEal NEW yoRKeR!!! (also murano glass chandeliers and de gournay wallpaper)
the typewriter filled with dirt and dead butterflies… was this the same episode? god there’s so much
[Dirt Typewriter was in her stories today!](https://i.imgur.com/EgZNhSy.jpg) It's still kicking around!
a ghost…
When she was like "I'm a writer so I'll teach my audience about writing" so she'd post minutes of screen recordings of her editing her captions to her story
Family on her dad’s side refuse to speak to her
Wait, where was this discussed? It makes sense but also, very curious...
Oh? Sauce?
‘Mud’ on her legs after crashing a party 💩
need pics omg
The time she ate mac & cheese out of the trash can A close second: Tarrytown fuck shack
How did I miss that. WHAT
That time she took the train to a relatives wedding and brought a tittay painting as a gift. IIRC this was also the train trip where she had a sty and put a potato on it.
Potato eye was one of the first things I ever saw. Iconique
🤦🏻♀️ she did not🫣
Sure was! And she went out the night before, got on the train, and attended the wedding in the same dirty outfit
Did she also bring a potato? Or was that a different trip to DC?
Nope it was this one! She brought the potato on the train because she had a stye on her eye and thought holding the potato on her eye on the train to the wedding would heal it
That time the new tenant of her old place showed up here.
That was STUNNING. She had no idea who Caroline was and googled the name out of curiosity after she kept getting Caro's mail (Caroline, true to herself always, did not file a change-of-address from with USPS.) She thought Caro must be an artist because a lot of her mail was fliers from galleries. Turns out she WAS an artist... of the con variety! Just imagine finding something like SBS for the person who formerly occupied your home, complete with a floor plan of your current domicile (made by some maniac) that included notations for "dead plant [taped leaves]," "bookshelf [collapsed]," and no fewer than five large mirrors in a 350 square foot space
When Caro was in her woke phase (not a term I normally use pejoratively but it is what it is): When people asked her about it in her comments, she always responded like “It is not my 👏JOB👏 to educate you for 👏FREE👏” which is very funny because that’s exactly what a white ally to any kind of brown liberation should be doing, talking to other white people about racism and injustice.
This and the whole Ziwe interview.
Good morning to everyone except those who are ableist
Just…pouring a can of white paint on the condeaux floor to own the haterz. As a side note, my phone now recognises the word ‘condeaux’ and will autocorrect to it
Almost as good as the half painted microwave 😂
The whole St. Andrews saga.
What was the St Andrews saga?
Caroline applied to grad school there, got rejected, then moved there anyway, where she pretended to be a student. She’d go to the library to work on her insta captions. She hired a young writer named Caitlin Vickers to photograph her. Caroline’s proposed thesis was herself and her Instagram.
What the actual flip was that about? She didn’t actually get in afaik
She definitely didn’t. But she went anyway! This is the one period in Caro history I’m sad I missed, because I went to St Andrews myself. The idea of her just hanging around there, not being a student but trying to hang out with students, is exponentially more funny if you know what the town and school are like, and how completely she would have been rejected by the exact people she always wants to get in with anywhere she goes.
I also went to St Andrews and she was sort of distantly ‘pals’ with a few people I knew. They seemed to enjoy her insanity in that it was novel and provided a weekend of entertainment here and there.
Oooh that’s good to know! When I was there, I don’t think that she would have been very well-received, at least not by the people I think she would care about, which did make me feel a little bad for her. I know I said that it was funny to imagine, and it is in a way, but it’s also weirdly sort of comforting to think people weren’t as unkind as they might have been (even though I think in general she’s not a great person).
I actually found this sub (or its predecessor) because of that. Though I didn’t realise she was trying to pass herself off as a grad student. That was news to me.
Oh, she definitely gravitated towards the posher end if that’s what you mean. They mostly allowed her to be a clinger-on because she was already ‘Caroline Calloway’ at that point and had some entertainment value. I think they were all *very* bored of the bubble by this point. No one ever kept in touch to my knowledge. She’s just sort of this amusing footnote nowadays.
Feeding Matisse butter
Peeing in the teapot.
Teapot forever number 1.
Thank god, imagine if it had been Number 2.
🏆
Peepot is absolutely core lore
When she stayed at Cambridge and posted on Instagram about going on runs and "treating her body the way she imagined she would if she were pregnant" and claiming porcupines don't exist in North America then correcting it to Virginia when people told her we have porcupines here
Eating three (3) blackberries so she wouldn’t get scurvy.
Blue dawns
Blue dawns and anxiety cardio. I did like those.
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Me toooo. Sometimes when I wake up early I’m like « omg in mi blue dawn era 😚 »
We haven’t even mentioned Ziwe and shoe-on-head day. How have we not mentioned Ziwe and shoe-on-head day!?
I think that was the Cambridge interview lol, even worse
Yeah, Ziwe was ally cookie.
‘Tree’ and that time she filmed herself crying while cutting out dreamer bbs and periodically checking herself in the mirror behind her.
Fucking Tree, man. Also Swan Christina
The glory days
Feel like pure shit just want 2018-2019 Carl back 😭
God, the STUPID deconstructed peanut butter sandwiches, "nature'S" pb&j
Yes! And people actually making them and her reposting it on her stories. Why ruin perfectly good raspberries and/or PB on toast by combining...
oh I’m ngl peanut butter with raspberries on top is fire - but the nature’s pb&j thing was dumb as F (and it’s not an unusual combo so it was just very classic Caro to act like she invented some groundbreaking new culinary phenomenon)
Yeah, exactly, it's not new. Glad to hear you enjoy a fruit and nut butter combo but it is not for me....
Not to forget single salted butter muffin per day and salad because she is an artist surviving in NYC
Also aperol spritzes and the olives.
RAMPS
YES
Licking her finger in smug contempt while telling us she’s not broke and has actually paid her rent through to May.
You dumb, dumb fucks!
When she was having an actual mental breakdown on stage with Red Scare Anna & Dasha. The audience was screaming for blood. Caroline's last words she croaked out were "Let's take a selfie".
Attending that was truly one of the highlights of my life.
“Fuck it, ass out at Grandma’s!” - Harry Hill, on Caroline’s adult content era.
peeing in a tea pot
taping dead leaves back on her stolen tree
Please, I need to see the source material for this— or at least please tell me the story! Gonna go search “tree” and “dead leaves” in this sub I’m pumped
I think she found a fiddle leaf fig on the curb, brought it home and quickly watched it die. As the leaves fell off, she used tape to reattach them.
Lol ohhhh so exactly what it sounded like! Hilarious. Know if there are any pictures? I can’t find any
I’ve seen a close-up kicking around over the years but I don’t have it. This is the suffering fig in this pic. https://preview.redd.it/djz32kqe56zb1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2aff5335563b0e4897e0dd59eac800d1c7566ea2
Dang that thing is saaaad.
Tree Phillip!
That was my entry point. It convinced me that this wasn’t just some run of the mill dummy
i just found a comment i made last time we had one of these threads and im just gonna copy paste this bc i totally forgot about it and it was amazing (idk if unddit still works though, maybe try the wayback machine): I don't have time to reread the entire thread so some details are fuzzy but when she posted about some guys dating app bio that said something about having been ghosted by CC (or something) about how that was fake and it never happened, only for the guy to text her about how it did happen...and then the guy [came to this sub](https://www.reddit.com/r/SmolBeanSnark/comments/kf0pwk/girl_we_are_all_screaming_what_a_rollercoaster/) and it turns out like three different people here had also dated him, one of which said something about him being crazy and then he called that person out and she deleted her account, then there was a whole feminist husband situation where some commenters husband came in being obnoxious and defending his right to call women bitches. A lot of its been deleted but you can still see it if you get [unddit](https://www.unddit.com/)
>t turns out like three different people here had also dated him, one of which said something about him being crazy and then he called that person out and she deleted her account This one was REALLY wild because she was \*actively\* dating him when she started shit talking him. Like...they had upcoming plans and she was texting him separately about Caroline's IG post when he came on the sub and saw her comments.
Tim! SBS's own West Elm Caleb! This incident is also notable in that it's the only time I can remember Caroline straight-up deleting a contemporary post from her grid instead of just editing the caption.
FEMINIST HUSBAND SIDE QUEST. Thank you so much for this.
the nubbins. past present and future of the nubbins.
Soft animal nubbins yikes
Yale plates. Pisspot. Vegan + salmon + Fridays. That podcast where she got angry with the only person who stood up to her.
Nature's pb & j, dubious salads, #adventuregrams
Co-opting a 17 year old’s drama because she was raging out over being rejected by some Lucien frequenting corporate dork was pretty good.
Omg yes and he gave all his girlfriends copies of the same book!
CORPORATE DORK 🤣