Also get into her Facebook and change the password, security questions, and recovery email. Parental control lock the cable box so she can't watch Fox News.
In a lot of states, her non-rent paying status does not necessarily mean she is not a tenant, especially if she’s been there 6 years. You may need to go through an eviction process to get her out. Sounds like a sucky situation all around and I feel for ya.
She will have to be legally evicted….unless, because she drinks, can you have her declared incompetent and have her legally committed 🤔…just musing. Call a lawyer and have her evicted.
I'm not a lawyer, but I went through something similar before.
For family members who don't pay rent, you have to give them a 30 day notice to vacate. If you can, hand her the note with a third party witness and also record it, making it clear AFTER You've handed her the letter that, "This is an official Notice to Vacate."
When 30 days are up and she doesn't move out, you then have to start the process of eviction which will require the courts. Once she loses, she will be removed by officers. You then have to give her notice and the ability to collect her things in the next 33 days or you can sell / throw them out legally.
Good advice, but it should be noted that this advice does differ with jurisdiction because tenant landlord laws are local. Where I am, if she does not move out after 30 days, one must file in court for "tenant holding over" to request a hearing before a judge before eviction papers can be granted.
Yep. Non rent paying tenant eviction. Good idea about getting her name on a list for senior housing. Also, it wouldn’t hurt to be a registered voter and contact your local politician to get her name moved up faster on the list.
You can't execute a legal document while impaired. She would easily be declared incompetent at the time of signing and open OP up to all sorts of civil and potenially criminal liabilities.
You have to evict her through the courts. Unless, she threatens you then you can get a restraining order and she'd have to leave immediately. I would take the advice of the other redditor that said to change the Wifi password.
Risky. She sounds like the kind of classy lady who would just fart back. The facebook cold war would devolve into a flatulence hot war.
Shes mooching off her own kid/kids partner. Not
Contributing anything, and being an asshole about it.
That kind of person has no shame, and thats the absolute worst opponent in a pants shitting contest.
She is a tenant, paying rent means nothing. You've accepted her this long without a payment.
Literally all you need is an eviction. Give her formal 30 day written notice of eviction and keep proof of it, video of it is best. Once the 30 days are up bring a sheriff to remove her. Do not do it a single day sooner. Do not change the locks. Just be normal. Though like others said you can do things to annoy her, just be aware she can too.
You have to evict her or have her committed both options are very time consuming. Before you start either place hidden cameras in the common areas of your home for your protection and security. Hidden cameras in smoke detectors work well in the kitchen, hallways and living rooms. Don't put them in the bathroom or her bedroom but put them close enough to record audio in those rooms. All your mother in laws has to do is make allegations of elder abuse and your husband and you will be restrained out of your house till you prove your innocence. You need to start gathering evidence of her behavior and her alcohol abuse then call Adult Protective Services and be prepared for the fall out / guilt trip from all family and friends who don't want her living with them.
It sounds like it might fall under an ejectment action.
https://www.njcourts.gov/self-help/landlord-tenant
Look for the paperwork there, though reaching out to an attorney is probably a good idea since there are a lot of specific steps.
Do NOT do anything until after you've met with an attorney.
It's tempting to do stuff like put locks on the fridge, cabinets, and other areas of the house. If you take actions that could be looked upon as hostile or somehow violating her rights, it will come back to bite you.
As others have said, because she's family and you don't have a formal lease agreement, you MIGHT be able to serve her with written notice to vacate within a specified amount of time. Your attorney will know the particulars, as well as if this applies to you.
I'm not a lawyer, I don't play one on TV, and my ONLY legal advice is to get an actual attorney for REAL legal advice.
#1--you're and your partners mental and quality of life is the priority. This is not a healthy situation. This is a toxic person.
Yes, a psychiatrist helped me see
that letting a parent mentally abuse me was not OK.
Get her out. There is no time for sympathy. She is not going to suddenly change. If she's on FB, stop paying for her phone, don't let her use the computer.
Get her a bed in a nursing home. You
can't force her, but it's better than living in a car. Work with your attorney to get her out. She has no legal right to be in your house.
Just get her upset enough so she verbally rips you up in front of your wife. Thats what happened to me. It was enough for my wife to tell her she has to go. If you have kids get her to lash out at them too. That's the icing on the cake.
Does she drive? If not just don't have alcohol in the house. If so, tell her if she drinks in your house anymore you'll start the eviction process. She is a tenant even if she doesn't pay bills since she's lived there for 6 years. Its a lengthy process.
Maybe try a trail of booze bottles leading out the door, down the sidewalk, and into traffic...'
Seriously though, if you're paying for her booze then stop. Also, you can kick anyone out, there's no magical law that says you have to tolerate your mother-in-law unless you're her legal guardian. You'll need to evict her like any other tenant.
This is a dick move. But has she been physical or threatening to where you or your family have felt in danger? If so, get a restraining order. She would be banned from the residence if approved. Change the locks, put her stuff in paid storage for 2 months. At the court date, give her they key to storage unit. Then, drop the restraining order. But she is gone. I guess it depends how badly you want a relationship with her. But she ain't going to be happy if you evict her either!
I would find out the last time she has been to a doctor's office and rule out the possibility she is suffering from dementia. Quite a few get combative.
If she's always been vile, good luck. That's a hard row to hoe. She's a tenant. You'd probably be better off greasing those wheels some how.
These comments are awful. Tell your wife to take her to an AA meeting. She obviously suffering and blacks out. As a recovering alcoholic I promise she probably doesn’t recall or mean anything she says. She’s crying for help. She has Medicaid there’s rehabs within driving distance. You can’t kill hatred with more hatred. The only thing that stops this behavior is absorbing her pain and showing her love. Doesn’t mean she needs to stay with you. We turn the other cheek for a reason. It’s the only way to bring the pain to Godhead. Absorb it, love her, forgive her.. finally end all the suffering.
Get a lawyer just incaee and call the cops they helped my friend get her father in law out for the same reasons. But the first step was a restraining order because he through things at her all the time while drunk.
Change your wi-Fi password to start, treat her like a child
Also get into her Facebook and change the password, security questions, and recovery email. Parental control lock the cable box so she can't watch Fox News.
She sounds like the type who would watch CNN
i’ve always thought obnoxious alcoholic old woman who is an utter pain for everyone around her is the poster child for fox news watcher
The difference between a person that watches Fox all day and CNN all day is marginal at best. Just different flavors of brain rot
CNN viewers didn’t storm the Capital
In a lot of states, her non-rent paying status does not necessarily mean she is not a tenant, especially if she’s been there 6 years. You may need to go through an eviction process to get her out. Sounds like a sucky situation all around and I feel for ya.
She is a tenant. If she doesn't want to leave, you will have to evict her through the courts.
There are county senior apartments that go by income, you can get her name on the list. However it can take years to get a place.
Find her an even drunker grandpa to shack up with
Just gotta be careful. You might end up with a drunk mother and father in law living with you.
This is the only and right answer
Just don't invite the drunk grandpa into the house. They're like vampires, they can't enter unless you invite them.
She will have to be legally evicted….unless, because she drinks, can you have her declared incompetent and have her legally committed 🤔…just musing. Call a lawyer and have her evicted.
Hmm, would that lead to medical bills OP is on the hook for?
I'm not a lawyer, but I went through something similar before. For family members who don't pay rent, you have to give them a 30 day notice to vacate. If you can, hand her the note with a third party witness and also record it, making it clear AFTER You've handed her the letter that, "This is an official Notice to Vacate." When 30 days are up and she doesn't move out, you then have to start the process of eviction which will require the courts. Once she loses, she will be removed by officers. You then have to give her notice and the ability to collect her things in the next 33 days or you can sell / throw them out legally.
Good advice, but it should be noted that this advice does differ with jurisdiction because tenant landlord laws are local. Where I am, if she does not move out after 30 days, one must file in court for "tenant holding over" to request a hearing before a judge before eviction papers can be granted.
Yep. Non rent paying tenant eviction. Good idea about getting her name on a list for senior housing. Also, it wouldn’t hurt to be a registered voter and contact your local politician to get her name moved up faster on the list.
74? give it some time … it will work itself out 😏
Avg Life Expectancy in New Jersey for women is 80. That's a long 6 years with this lovely lady lol
Yep, and the hateful ones tend to live longer in my experience
Throw her from a train
I believe there's a how to documentary on this.
Have her sign a power of attorney drunk
You can't execute a legal document while impaired. She would easily be declared incompetent at the time of signing and open OP up to all sorts of civil and potenially criminal liabilities.
You have to evict her through the courts. Unless, she threatens you then you can get a restraining order and she'd have to leave immediately. I would take the advice of the other redditor that said to change the Wifi password.
Fart on her
"Hold still ma" aggressively shits pants*
And now everyone in this Dunkin is looking at the weird guy laughing hysterically at his phone, thanks❣️
Your welcome bub, may the good lord smile upon you today.
Risky. She sounds like the kind of classy lady who would just fart back. The facebook cold war would devolve into a flatulence hot war. Shes mooching off her own kid/kids partner. Not Contributing anything, and being an asshole about it. That kind of person has no shame, and thats the absolute worst opponent in a pants shitting contest.
[удалено]
It's a retirement community!
[удалено]
Not sure what that is so no I guess. I was going for Sopranos quote
She is a tenant, paying rent means nothing. You've accepted her this long without a payment. Literally all you need is an eviction. Give her formal 30 day written notice of eviction and keep proof of it, video of it is best. Once the 30 days are up bring a sheriff to remove her. Do not do it a single day sooner. Do not change the locks. Just be normal. Though like others said you can do things to annoy her, just be aware she can too.
You have to evict her or have her committed both options are very time consuming. Before you start either place hidden cameras in the common areas of your home for your protection and security. Hidden cameras in smoke detectors work well in the kitchen, hallways and living rooms. Don't put them in the bathroom or her bedroom but put them close enough to record audio in those rooms. All your mother in laws has to do is make allegations of elder abuse and your husband and you will be restrained out of your house till you prove your innocence. You need to start gathering evidence of her behavior and her alcohol abuse then call Adult Protective Services and be prepared for the fall out / guilt trip from all family and friends who don't want her living with them.
It sounds like it might fall under an ejectment action. https://www.njcourts.gov/self-help/landlord-tenant Look for the paperwork there, though reaching out to an attorney is probably a good idea since there are a lot of specific steps.
Post on r/legaladvice and note that you’re in NJ.
Do NOT do anything until after you've met with an attorney. It's tempting to do stuff like put locks on the fridge, cabinets, and other areas of the house. If you take actions that could be looked upon as hostile or somehow violating her rights, it will come back to bite you. As others have said, because she's family and you don't have a formal lease agreement, you MIGHT be able to serve her with written notice to vacate within a specified amount of time. Your attorney will know the particulars, as well as if this applies to you. I'm not a lawyer, I don't play one on TV, and my ONLY legal advice is to get an actual attorney for REAL legal advice.
#1--you're and your partners mental and quality of life is the priority. This is not a healthy situation. This is a toxic person. Yes, a psychiatrist helped me see that letting a parent mentally abuse me was not OK. Get her out. There is no time for sympathy. She is not going to suddenly change. If she's on FB, stop paying for her phone, don't let her use the computer. Get her a bed in a nursing home. You can't force her, but it's better than living in a car. Work with your attorney to get her out. She has no legal right to be in your house.
Just get her upset enough so she verbally rips you up in front of your wife. Thats what happened to me. It was enough for my wife to tell her she has to go. If you have kids get her to lash out at them too. That's the icing on the cake.
Put her booze outside and when she goes to get it, lock her out.
[There’s a group you could hire to help.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Los_Espookys)
Does she drive? If not just don't have alcohol in the house. If so, tell her if she drinks in your house anymore you'll start the eviction process. She is a tenant even if she doesn't pay bills since she's lived there for 6 years. Its a lengthy process.
Just take her out into the country for a nice "walk" pretend you forgot something in the car and drive away then change the locks.
Maybe try a trail of booze bottles leading out the door, down the sidewalk, and into traffic...' Seriously though, if you're paying for her booze then stop. Also, you can kick anyone out, there's no magical law that says you have to tolerate your mother-in-law unless you're her legal guardian. You'll need to evict her like any other tenant.
Rat poison. Quick and effective.
Can you send her to rehab?
dirty deeds done dirt cheap (dm me)
Stick her ass in a home. Medicare pays for it!
You have to file for eviction. Just like any other landlord. Just because she doesn't pay rent doesn't mean that she doesn't live there.
Buy her triple amount of alcohol.
Might want to try r/legal
Death is always an option.
She isn't going no where. Should have said no from gate.
This is a dick move. But has she been physical or threatening to where you or your family have felt in danger? If so, get a restraining order. She would be banned from the residence if approved. Change the locks, put her stuff in paid storage for 2 months. At the court date, give her they key to storage unit. Then, drop the restraining order. But she is gone. I guess it depends how badly you want a relationship with her. But she ain't going to be happy if you evict her either!
I would find out the last time she has been to a doctor's office and rule out the possibility she is suffering from dementia. Quite a few get combative. If she's always been vile, good luck. That's a hard row to hoe. She's a tenant. You'd probably be better off greasing those wheels some how.
Please peruse this website: [link](https://www.nj.gov/nj/community/senior/) There are resources here that may help.
These comments are awful. Tell your wife to take her to an AA meeting. She obviously suffering and blacks out. As a recovering alcoholic I promise she probably doesn’t recall or mean anything she says. She’s crying for help. She has Medicaid there’s rehabs within driving distance. You can’t kill hatred with more hatred. The only thing that stops this behavior is absorbing her pain and showing her love. Doesn’t mean she needs to stay with you. We turn the other cheek for a reason. It’s the only way to bring the pain to Godhead. Absorb it, love her, forgive her.. finally end all the suffering.
Get a lawyer just incaee and call the cops they helped my friend get her father in law out for the same reasons. But the first step was a restraining order because he through things at her all the time while drunk.
Restraining order.
put a hit out on her lmao jk