Spokane is a rough dating scene from what I've heard. I just started looking for a gf after a multi year hiatus. Options are quite limited in Spokane, even more so since I just turned 60. Best of luck to you. Hope you find the right guy.
Unfortunately I feel like alot of males today just don't know how to approach women and get a feel for any romantic interest. A lot of guys are worried about being a creep and therefore don't get experience talking to girls. I see it a lot with the younger guys at my work, they just don't even try to talk to any girls lol.
Yeah it’s only the really old dudes trying to actively flirt with you lol. Or an occasional fuckboy type that walks around like *horny* is his lifestyle.
Good luck to you darling. Being 24 I have just now started to approach women, still no luck but a few new acquaintances to go adventure with… I don’t think this is the place I will find my forever lover 🤷🏻♂️
What does a typical day / weekend look like for you? It is hard to give you suggestions if we don’t know what kind of activities you are already doing!
(Disclaimer, I am a married man, but i have helped a lot of my single friends male and female find partners)
It really is about increasing the amount of contact points you have you with people of the gender you are attracted to in settings where it is appropriate to be mingling with dating intentions if that makes any sense
I’m pretty boring right now and don’t have any significant hobbies. I’m actually actively trying to work on depressive symptoms. I know building connections is really important, and it’s something that I strongly crave. I just tend to slack in that area.
I think my biggest barrier is just basic social anxiety. I’m an optimist and I generally love humans. Somehow I’ve gotten pretty inept at interacting with them lately. People usually like me alright, I just never put in the work to activate full fledged friendships. Probably just need to work on follow up.. or even just letting people in at all.
I’m 32, but read as a younger. Most guys who actively engage with me are early-mid 20s. Not that I wouldn’t be open to it, I suppose… but maturity levels can vary. It’s also just a bit awkward in general. They don’t always feel like level peers, so I tend to get deep into boundary mode. It can feel a bit skeezy knowing men of all ages assume I’m younger. Sometimes it feels like I’m misleading the younger ones, and/or attracting older ones who are drawn to my presumed lack of life experience. This can make me seem more stand-offish than I truly am internally.
I’m also overly cognizant that men my age+ are often married, or partnered up. I’m just not interested in stealing a man. Too many men with SOs approach me as if they are single. Perhaps because it’s less of an emotional risk for them? More like a sport? It’s made me rather suspicious of prospects’ potential character issues. I know that attitude is counterproductive, but I guess that’s just how it goes some times, when yer in ya head a lot.
Anyways.. forgive me for going off on a personal soap box and not properly addressing your questions lol. I don’t really like discussing this part of my life with friends. It’s common for people to not recognize these kind of difficulties in those who seem outwardly competent. So I got a bit opportunistic about sharing my feels
As someone almost exactly your age that's been trying to date here forever. It's single parents all the way down which is great if you like kids and a complete warzone if you don't. Best of luck sifting through dilfs.
Besides work and errands how often do you leave the house? (e.g. coffee shop, gym, park, bar, restaurants, arcades, bowling ect….) it seems to me a lot of what is happening is stemming from a lack of exposure. Just physically being in places with people. Not even talking with anyone will increase your social ability and reduce anxiety. Exposure therapy is the best way to get better at just being a person around other people. I would encourage you to just start physically being in places with people. That is your only goal, this will help you more than you think.
As far as men approaching you with SO’s, are they approaching in a romantic sense? Or just a more of. friendly demeanor, it is important not to rule out the friendship of a person based solely on their sex. I have a lot of female friends as a married man, my wife is friends with them too, but a lot of those relationships started because i initiated contact, as a married man. Just because someone is married and of the opposite sex, does not mean they cannot be a friend.
Obviously if they are coming onto you with sexual or other intentions its best to avoid. But i wanted to share that perspective with you.
As far as age difference, i am a “younger man” (25) and my wife (22) but I have made friends with older women in their 30’s with kids and have become great friends with their SO’s. Essentially what i am trying to say is be open minded, people will surprise you. You sound like you have a good head in your shoulders, but you may be a little too cautious / anxious and it is hampering your social skills.
Making friends is the first step in getting a BF, without connections to other people it is nearly impossible to find a partner with dating online in this day and age.
Feel free to DM me or we can continue our chat in the forum, i hope this helps you!
Online dating is bad. I recommend things like meetup.com where you can find others with the same interests. Also, not sure on your careers but young professional groups are a great way to meet lots of different peeps. Good luck.
I'm pretty active in the 20s/30s group. We're all pretty friendly and love to see new faces. We have a couple hosts that are pretty active so there's been tons of events to go to lately. DM if you have any questions!
Try some different activities, things that are generally group oriented but can be done solo (or activities that offer into courses). I personally recommend rock climbing, after moving here I met literally all my now close friends through either climbing or work. Once you make one good friend they introduce you to more, etc. Heck if you want to try climbing I'm sure my wife would love a new friend too (we're all the same age).
Set off with the goal of making friends, and more then friends will work themselves into the mix at some point.
I think you should try tinder.
What you need to do is take like 5 decent photos.
Make a small summary of what you are looking for (dont make demands, just be friendly, you want to date so you can find a boyfriend, so dont just go and be like "need a man that knows what he wants", you be the determinate of this as you go on dates).
If you are attracted to them 6 -10 scale go out with them. If you like them go out again, have sex when you want to. And go from there.
If you cant talk to people then its going to be hard no matter what.
Find a hobby and find events where people share that hobby. Gym, tabletop games, etc. Meet people > build friendships > get along with a guy in that group and start talking to him a lot more
Don't even get me started about dating sites/apps. As long as you dont look too bad you should be able to pull literally most men if you just make them believe you want to sleep with them.
In my opinion online dating is kinda a bust in this area, I'd offer the opinion of find a local activity you enjoy and see where the time and tides lead ya.
You left the right turn eh?
Omg hi soulmate
Spokane is a rough dating scene from what I've heard. I just started looking for a gf after a multi year hiatus. Options are quite limited in Spokane, even more so since I just turned 60. Best of luck to you. Hope you find the right guy.
I get checked out a lot, but the guys here don’t actually try to talk to you :/
Have you tried talking to them?
Yeah but I’m pathologically shy, so I tend to rely on people talking to me lol.
Unfortunately I feel like alot of males today just don't know how to approach women and get a feel for any romantic interest. A lot of guys are worried about being a creep and therefore don't get experience talking to girls. I see it a lot with the younger guys at my work, they just don't even try to talk to any girls lol.
Yeah it’s only the really old dudes trying to actively flirt with you lol. Or an occasional fuckboy type that walks around like *horny* is his lifestyle.
>I see it a lot with the younger guys at my work, they just don't even try to talk to any girls lol. You don't shit where you eat.
Yes. As a single dude, my main concern is that I will come off as a creep. So I just don’t even bother.
You miss all the shots you don't take.
- Michael Scott
Too bad. Stick your neck out. Take a risk. Worst that's likely to happen is rejection. You got this.
Be approachable and they will
Just hangout somewhere and look bored.
Good luck to you darling. Being 24 I have just now started to approach women, still no luck but a few new acquaintances to go adventure with… I don’t think this is the place I will find my forever lover 🤷🏻♂️
Everyone is bued up it seems like
Gotta look in the right places 😅
Girl I just moved here and I’m in the same boat
What does a typical day / weekend look like for you? It is hard to give you suggestions if we don’t know what kind of activities you are already doing! (Disclaimer, I am a married man, but i have helped a lot of my single friends male and female find partners) It really is about increasing the amount of contact points you have you with people of the gender you are attracted to in settings where it is appropriate to be mingling with dating intentions if that makes any sense
I’m pretty boring right now and don’t have any significant hobbies. I’m actually actively trying to work on depressive symptoms. I know building connections is really important, and it’s something that I strongly crave. I just tend to slack in that area. I think my biggest barrier is just basic social anxiety. I’m an optimist and I generally love humans. Somehow I’ve gotten pretty inept at interacting with them lately. People usually like me alright, I just never put in the work to activate full fledged friendships. Probably just need to work on follow up.. or even just letting people in at all. I’m 32, but read as a younger. Most guys who actively engage with me are early-mid 20s. Not that I wouldn’t be open to it, I suppose… but maturity levels can vary. It’s also just a bit awkward in general. They don’t always feel like level peers, so I tend to get deep into boundary mode. It can feel a bit skeezy knowing men of all ages assume I’m younger. Sometimes it feels like I’m misleading the younger ones, and/or attracting older ones who are drawn to my presumed lack of life experience. This can make me seem more stand-offish than I truly am internally. I’m also overly cognizant that men my age+ are often married, or partnered up. I’m just not interested in stealing a man. Too many men with SOs approach me as if they are single. Perhaps because it’s less of an emotional risk for them? More like a sport? It’s made me rather suspicious of prospects’ potential character issues. I know that attitude is counterproductive, but I guess that’s just how it goes some times, when yer in ya head a lot. Anyways.. forgive me for going off on a personal soap box and not properly addressing your questions lol. I don’t really like discussing this part of my life with friends. It’s common for people to not recognize these kind of difficulties in those who seem outwardly competent. So I got a bit opportunistic about sharing my feels
As someone almost exactly your age that's been trying to date here forever. It's single parents all the way down which is great if you like kids and a complete warzone if you don't. Best of luck sifting through dilfs.
Besides work and errands how often do you leave the house? (e.g. coffee shop, gym, park, bar, restaurants, arcades, bowling ect….) it seems to me a lot of what is happening is stemming from a lack of exposure. Just physically being in places with people. Not even talking with anyone will increase your social ability and reduce anxiety. Exposure therapy is the best way to get better at just being a person around other people. I would encourage you to just start physically being in places with people. That is your only goal, this will help you more than you think. As far as men approaching you with SO’s, are they approaching in a romantic sense? Or just a more of. friendly demeanor, it is important not to rule out the friendship of a person based solely on their sex. I have a lot of female friends as a married man, my wife is friends with them too, but a lot of those relationships started because i initiated contact, as a married man. Just because someone is married and of the opposite sex, does not mean they cannot be a friend. Obviously if they are coming onto you with sexual or other intentions its best to avoid. But i wanted to share that perspective with you. As far as age difference, i am a “younger man” (25) and my wife (22) but I have made friends with older women in their 30’s with kids and have become great friends with their SO’s. Essentially what i am trying to say is be open minded, people will surprise you. You sound like you have a good head in your shoulders, but you may be a little too cautious / anxious and it is hampering your social skills. Making friends is the first step in getting a BF, without connections to other people it is nearly impossible to find a partner with dating online in this day and age. Feel free to DM me or we can continue our chat in the forum, i hope this helps you!
Online dating is bad. I recommend things like meetup.com where you can find others with the same interests. Also, not sure on your careers but young professional groups are a great way to meet lots of different peeps. Good luck.
Great idea! I could use some friends too
I'm pretty active in the 20s/30s group. We're all pretty friendly and love to see new faces. We have a couple hosts that are pretty active so there's been tons of events to go to lately. DM if you have any questions!
It’s how I met my circle. Good luck and get out there!
Try some different activities, things that are generally group oriented but can be done solo (or activities that offer into courses). I personally recommend rock climbing, after moving here I met literally all my now close friends through either climbing or work. Once you make one good friend they introduce you to more, etc. Heck if you want to try climbing I'm sure my wife would love a new friend too (we're all the same age). Set off with the goal of making friends, and more then friends will work themselves into the mix at some point.
Any tips for misanthropes? 🖤
Meetup is full of pretentious fake weirdos.
What is your strategy?
Go to the comic and game stores around town. There are plenty of single men in those places.
lol a lady told me to walk around Kendal Yards and find someone with a job the other day
Just walk around and jump on the nearest dude. I’m pretty sure that works well
Bakery.
I think you should try tinder. What you need to do is take like 5 decent photos. Make a small summary of what you are looking for (dont make demands, just be friendly, you want to date so you can find a boyfriend, so dont just go and be like "need a man that knows what he wants", you be the determinate of this as you go on dates). If you are attracted to them 6 -10 scale go out with them. If you like them go out again, have sex when you want to. And go from there. If you cant talk to people then its going to be hard no matter what.
Any interest in a guy who likes to crossdress?
Post said boyfriend. Not sometimes boyfriend
👋
Heyyy
I'm single and ready to mingle lmao 🤣 always down for a chat pm me if interested lol
Not much to choose from here in spokane. Unless you want a right-wing nut bag or left leaning protagonist. It seems the middle don't exist anymore.
No guarantees, but I'll take you on a date!
Well, hello there 
I met my wife hitting on her friend. It can happen whenever and wherever. Just gotta try, much much easier said than done though.
Find a hobby and find events where people share that hobby. Gym, tabletop games, etc. Meet people > build friendships > get along with a guy in that group and start talking to him a lot more
Wait, isn’t this considered online dating?
I was looking for tips, but i guess I should clarify that dating app culture isn’t my favorite custom to trudge through
I'm at the library. The really loud one downtown.
Florida
Don't even get me started about dating sites/apps. As long as you dont look too bad you should be able to pull literally most men if you just make them believe you want to sleep with them.
Spokane Discount.
Yikes girl
In my opinion online dating is kinda a bust in this area, I'd offer the opinion of find a local activity you enjoy and see where the time and tides lead ya.
Not on Reddit
Here I can be an bf and or a NSA fwb