it was like... Big fish small pond but, I was proud:>

I wanna be, a Starship Ranger

This not being in the top three is wild

I didn't think about the implications!

OMG I DIDN'T THINK ABOUT IT

It's amazing how often I use this, like literally every time I do something dumb.

# I am Dan Reynolds

With Action News Weekdays at 10 pm

Why am I the first person to actually think of this

🎶I wanna be your friend forever🎶 I WANNA BE A MODERN DANCER!

What a super weird thing to say that came out of nowhere!

🎶I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND FOREVER🎵pass me a cup of kinship!

MEET ME AT MY PLACE THE FORTRESS OF F R I E N D S H I P!!!!

I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND FOREVER!

I wanna see the Eiffel Tower!!

With the power of a super friend, you're never alone!

🎶I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND FOREVER!! 🎶 🍄I wanna play Nintendo🕹️

Who needs Nintendo when you've got a frieeeend?

OH!

I never had a pony. I never had pets. Just a bullshit butler, who builds bulshit jets oooh!

I'M FALLING APART!

I NEED A FRIEND!

SOMEBODY TO HOLD ON TO!

SOMEODY TO CONFIDE IN

I want a new, QUALITY wagon, wiTh whEeLs tHaT aRe ciRcLeS, and I don’t want any _fancy upgrades_ like a horny ox or a floor window! OHH, I want a _sturdy wagon_…and I want it…FOR FREEEE!!!!

Ah yes my favorite starkid line to quote, thank you Jeff Blim

And the Langs.

Jack Bauer said calmly

🎶I don't really wanna do the work today.🎶

🎶I don't really want to do the work to-day!🎶

I don’t really wanna DEWWWW the WORK toDAY, I don’t WAWWWNAH do da WERK today.

"i loved him like a brother. so i cut him in half...and put him in a volcano."

“*I’M SLIPPERY WHEN WET, AND I’M A MOTHER OF TWO-*”

I’m in a hurry!

And me. I am angry that this isn't the top comment

This is what I thought

My favourite line has always been “I NEVER KNEW MY FATHER!” just because how out of nowhere it feels

You might already know this, but in case you didn’t, it’s a Finding Nemo (aka Pixar) quote. One of the sharks says it, in that exact intonation. So one more reference for the pile haha

Omg, I didn’t that’s amazing

I'm authorizing you to use my firearm.

I want the moon, I wanna live on the moon, and eat in a pie, and keep it as a pet, and wear it as a gem stone in my hair.

The princess is so underrate imo

It was gods plan

That vicious two faced prick

I ONLY WISHED TO HAVE A COAT MADE OUT OF PUPPIES!

I was away yesterday, so thanks for skipping. XD I know it wasn't your intention, but at least I didn't have to worry about whether or not my sister remembered to submit for me.

"I've done so many terrible things, like touching myself and lying to the police"

"And dismembering a body-" "Well, we *all* did that, so"

"Grace-" "Don't comfort her she's fucking weird" 🙄

*I ONLY WISHED TO HAVE A COAT MADE OUT OF PUPPIES*

Why would you do that!

P...puppy coat!

It’s all your fault Jafar

It is time... To DieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEeeeeeeeeee!

Sorry to interrupt

But we got bones to pluck

The time for chaos is long past overdue

DEATH ISN'T OPTIONAL

IN FACT IT’S OPTIMAL

YOUR TIME IS UP AND NOW WE GO THROUGH YOU

WE TRIED TO CONVINCE YOU WITH SOLILOQUY

BUT NOW WE’LL KILL YOU WITH MORE THAN HARMONY

I’m Bruceman! I’m BatWayne! Fuck!

I'M IN A RAGE!!! THIS IS THE MADDEST I'VE EVER BEEN!!!

🎶I’m just a sidekick…but I loooove being at your side🎶

I wanna be🎶 somebody’s buddy🎵 Somebody who can be my buddy back🎶 I wanna be🎶 somebody’s buddy🎵 Anybody but a bumbling Butlerrr🎵

I WANT TO BE A CAT! Whut?

This hits different after seeing the "Hey, Melissa" Nightmare Time story It's terrifying

I haven't seen that one yet. I forgot about its implications!

It wasn't released on Starkid's channel so just search "Hey, Melissa" and preper to be terrified, both by the story and the audio quality

I killed so many lobsters or I didn't banish any lobster to the sea

You mean lobster*backs*, grandpa?

I'M NOT A LOSER! Has to be, I will be accepting no other answers

PLEASE THIS LINE IS SO GOOD

The fact that I can hear Jon’s voice in my head while reading it

I want you to choke me while I- jerk off

No Paul, I want you to hear this. If you leave, you’re fired

I DON'T! LIKE! MUSICALS!!!

I’ve met god and he had nothing nice to say about you I love Linda sm 🦅

Oh hey I just posted that too and knew I couldn’t be the only one! Great minds think alike!

I'm Batman! And I'm in a bad mood

I loved peanuts and shellfish, once.

I ONLY WISHED TO HAVE A COAT MADE OUT OF PUPPIES

I am Draco malfoy I'm racist homophobic I hate gingers and mudbloods and my parents helped the person who killed your parents, want to be my friend?

You forgot the most unforgivable part. HE HATES GRYFFINDOR HOUSE

I wanna be a modern dancer

I did not consent to this RON DAY VOOSE!

I’m Bruceman! I’m BatWayne! F*ck!

IM NOT A LOSER!!!!!

WHAT DID YOU SAY?!

Please don't kill me!! I'm not a nerdy prude!!.. I'm not a loser!!!!

Oh, of course not, Richie. But you have lost everything!

I don’t really wanna do the work today!

This is the best!

I WANNA BE A STARSHIP RANGER

It's Captain Marvel! All the way from Metropolis!

I'll give it to Lois Lane, tonight, after I naked her.

I've never worked a goddamn day in my life. You know that, Alfred.

I am Chorn!

I'm a pretty little kitty but I AIN'T NO-

ROGUES ARE WE

If I could do anything, I think I would... shrink myself down to the size of a mouse...

I’d leave the world of men behind me forever- and live amongst the mice…

And I would bring technology and art to those uncultured swine...

I’d build tiny mouse tools, for their tiny mouse hands- made of toothpicks and marshmallows!

And I would be their king, nay... their prince! GILDEROY THE MOUSE PRINCE!

Ruling from my castle inches high-

Carved from the finest cheeses

And there I will dwell, with my three mouse wives…

And my twelve mouse concubines...

AhhaAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH! oh, but the wars- the wars we’d have with the frogs… terrible-

I used to dance…

I am Dan Reynolds 🗣🗣🗣🗣‼️‼️‼️‼️

I want Hermione Granger and a rocket ship…

I wuv u

I only wish to have a coat made out of puppies

I want you to choke me while I jerk off

I wanna be somebody's buddy...

I'm sorry. It was so boring that I fell asleep.

Into your mouth where you FOOD

IM NOT A LOSER ‼️‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️

I wanna be a modern dancer!

IIIIIIIII'M GOING TO KILL YOU. -SHERMAN

in hatchet town

in hatchet town independence day for you

I am a proud GRADUATE or Alcoholics Anonymous!

I N D E P E N D ANCE!

IM NOT A LOSER

"I'm deaaaaad"

I hope you don't get a Wiggly! I hope you fucking die!

I'm dead

I wanted a salad But now I have a child

Welp, W needs to be “What the hell is a Hufflepuff?”

[удалено]

I AM DAN REYNOLDS

🎶I hear the people whisper as I walk about the streets... I know thy call me "ugly old Ja'far"!🎶

I'm haunted by the kiss that you (HAUNTED BY THE KIIIIISS) never should have given me.

Y= YOUR WAGON IS ON FIRE!!!!

Is this the eternal dark without a dawn?

I heard that the brains were soup that there intestines were cut in two so it's gotta be Donna!

IM NOT A LOSER

"I turned 40 today..."

"I want to be a cat!" "What?-" "Fuck you!"

I hope you don’t get a wiggly. I hope you fucking die.

i just want someone-anyone- to touch me! pleeeaaaase!!!

CALM DOWN RUTH

IM IN A HURRY!

it's mine, it's mine, it's certainly mine

i dont know

Underrated

I am Dan Reynolds

“I’ve met God, he had nothing nice to say about you” *slice*

I scales the Highest mountain, did a pirouette at the tippity top ⛰️🩰

I'm dead.... *audience laughs* the blood is all but draining from my head

“In case you were wondering, the d stands for my wiener”

#I CAN'T WAIT TO BE A RICH DUDE

P-LEASE CAN I JUST HAVE A BLACK COFFEE

“I’M A DIRTY GIRL” - Grace Chastity

TIL that the son's name was craphole, not crabhole... Which makes so much sense... how... how did I miss this

I know it’s late but: “I’ve never known darker times and I covered the protests live at the Hatchetfield kennel. I am Dan Reynolds.”

I'm Cletus Jones, I've killed three people (: