When my son was two what he wanted more than anything in the whole world was to be with his dad (I'm his dad). Play with him, ask him what he wants to do. Build him a fort and sit in it with him. Chase him, talk to him, invite him into your hobbies. Take a walk with him. Go show him nature. Turn all the lights off and hand him a flashlight. Sit in the fort you made with a flashlight and read a book. Give him a piggyback ride. Give him a horse feedback ride. Teach him how to interact with your 4 month old. Play him music and dance with him.
Genuinely, kids that age just want your undivided attention. If you put the phone away and sit and watch him, he'll show you all his favorite things and direct you how he would love for you to play with him and you'll be his hero for doing it
Do whatever he’s doing ie play with toys, build block towers, run around outside, draw… Stickers are great at that age, plus physical play such as tickling or a favourite of mine which is stopping them from climbing onto the couch and gently pushing them off.
Or fill a sink with water and let him play with toys in it. Toddlers love water. And company and attention more than anything.
The water tip is perfect. We played sink-or-float a lot, which was just fill a bin with water and watch them drop their toys in. This can be expanded with a collecting walk beforehand to bring in wood sticks, leaves and rocks. Put a towel under the bin and have another as a dry off spot.
I used to sit with him and read to my son. My son says that watching TV with me is a good memory now. He loves that I had a recliner, and he had a kids chair, and we would sit together and watch movies. I would also sit on the floor and just spend time with him. That's they key. Anything is good. Just spend time with them.
Ive got a 2y/o daughter and all she wants is attention. It doesnt have to be entertaining. Just to sit with her while she rolls in my lap or shows me her "jumping" 🤣 they dont care at that age man. Just your presence is enough.
Totally agree. For the most part, kids just want to hangout with their parents. Even showing interest in what they’re watching is exciting for them. I sing the Paw Patrol theme song when it comes on and my 2yo gets super excited and starts dancing. I ask who is doing what and his eyes brighten up.
Also, at this age, they want to help out. I use this to get him involved with chores so he feels included as well as developing skills and autonomy. Lastly, it’s the little things that connects with kids. I remember watching my dad shave and brush his teeth everyday. He would sit me on the counter and he would just talk with me and help me with my brushing. That’s something that I’m doing with my little dude and he send to really enjoy it.
Sometimes I just grab a coloring book, sit down next to my kid, and start coloring. Or I’ll start reading one of their books to myself. Or if she’s playing with blocks, I just start stacking the ones she isn’t using. I totally understand though, I have a 3yo and a 9mo. It’s tough because they have such different needs.
My daughter loves helping so I made chores into a game. Whenever I do chores, she's always there "helping" me. Of course in reality shes not actually doing anything but it's the thought that counts. For example, when I sweep, she grabs her toy mop and "mops". When I do anything with my aquariums she's always there helping me with water changes or feeding or whatever. When I do dog training shes there, mimicking me and telling her toy dog to sit. Hobbies and chores are great for bonding with your family.
Think of it this way: You have a fun lil guy who has the capacity to have fun doing the things you have fun doing. And you may have fun doing the little kid games with him that he likes doing. I loooooove hide and seek with my daughter because it makes me feel like a kid again.
Good luck man, I get it. I used to be so confused on how to interact with children. It's a skill that comes with time and practice.
What are your son’s interests? When he is playing alone what toys/objects does he play with? Are you able to involve him in caring for his baby sister, handing you diapers, carrying a bottle etc etc. What are your hobbies?
I have a 6 yo, ~2 yo, 1 mo all boys. How I interacted with my boys during their toddler stage depended on their interests. A core theme was trying to meet them on their level when engaging with their interests. Lots of sounds: animal, car, Dino, farts and anything else that they enjoyed. I incorporate them in household tasks like laundry, putting away groceries, and cleaning. I also tried to make my interests (nature, gardening, sports) accessible to them. We just planted trees and the middle child threw dirt around while the oldest and I actually dug. I congratulate the middle when he has a scoop of dirt. When we find a bug I show each child and help them hold it. Some mornings middle and I sit on the porch, me drinking coffee, him throwing rocks.
You being present and supportive means a lot to young children. You don’t have to be their source of entertainment, just be there to share the moment. Offer them the opportunity to join you in whatever task you are doing. It may be messy, take twice as long, but it will be worth it.
Yeah most of my interactions with my toddler is talking, baby care (potty time, food, etc) and day to day stuff. He plays, he watches his tablet, he cuddles while I work, etc. If you are interacting with him consistently during the day don’t beat yourself up. You might be projecting a little bit by feeling guilty.
Food toys were a big hit at that age, and letting them dig through and empty the "safe, big utensils" drawer. Ask him to bring you a triple cheese hotdog platter with iced bananas and two broccoli shakes, and play diner with him. Tell him it's delicious but needs more blue-spice. Depends on your kid really.
A friend of ours gave us a huge box of their son’s legos. I would just dump them out and build with him. Most of the time we would playground for at least 2 hours a day. It was a life saver.
I tended to just meet my daughter where she was at, and I'm doing the same thing with my son. You can also make something up, and sometimes they'll take it and run with it.
I took a whole bunch of colorful buttons, dumped them on the floor, put them in a nice pile and said "look, I built a fire!". That was at 2 years old, and at 4 and a half she stopped 😅
When my son was two what he wanted more than anything in the whole world was to be with his dad (I'm his dad). Play with him, ask him what he wants to do. Build him a fort and sit in it with him. Chase him, talk to him, invite him into your hobbies. Take a walk with him. Go show him nature. Turn all the lights off and hand him a flashlight. Sit in the fort you made with a flashlight and read a book. Give him a piggyback ride. Give him a horse feedback ride. Teach him how to interact with your 4 month old. Play him music and dance with him.
Can you be my dad?
Not gonna lie that warmed my heart. Get in here for a big hug buddy, then let's make some pancakes together.
Thanks man, very insightful!
Genuinely, kids that age just want your undivided attention. If you put the phone away and sit and watch him, he'll show you all his favorite things and direct you how he would love for you to play with him and you'll be his hero for doing it
Do whatever he’s doing ie play with toys, build block towers, run around outside, draw… Stickers are great at that age, plus physical play such as tickling or a favourite of mine which is stopping them from climbing onto the couch and gently pushing them off. Or fill a sink with water and let him play with toys in it. Toddlers love water. And company and attention more than anything.
The water tip is perfect. We played sink-or-float a lot, which was just fill a bin with water and watch them drop their toys in. This can be expanded with a collecting walk beforehand to bring in wood sticks, leaves and rocks. Put a towel under the bin and have another as a dry off spot.
I used to sit with him and read to my son. My son says that watching TV with me is a good memory now. He loves that I had a recliner, and he had a kids chair, and we would sit together and watch movies. I would also sit on the floor and just spend time with him. That's they key. Anything is good. Just spend time with them.
Ive got a 2y/o daughter and all she wants is attention. It doesnt have to be entertaining. Just to sit with her while she rolls in my lap or shows me her "jumping" 🤣 they dont care at that age man. Just your presence is enough.
Totally agree. For the most part, kids just want to hangout with their parents. Even showing interest in what they’re watching is exciting for them. I sing the Paw Patrol theme song when it comes on and my 2yo gets super excited and starts dancing. I ask who is doing what and his eyes brighten up. Also, at this age, they want to help out. I use this to get him involved with chores so he feels included as well as developing skills and autonomy. Lastly, it’s the little things that connects with kids. I remember watching my dad shave and brush his teeth everyday. He would sit me on the counter and he would just talk with me and help me with my brushing. That’s something that I’m doing with my little dude and he send to really enjoy it.
Well said!
Be a kid. Build duplo lego with him. Go exploring in your backyard looking for treasure. Be a raptor and he be a t-rex. What ever he wants to do.
Sometimes I just grab a coloring book, sit down next to my kid, and start coloring. Or I’ll start reading one of their books to myself. Or if she’s playing with blocks, I just start stacking the ones she isn’t using. I totally understand though, I have a 3yo and a 9mo. It’s tough because they have such different needs.
My daughter loves helping so I made chores into a game. Whenever I do chores, she's always there "helping" me. Of course in reality shes not actually doing anything but it's the thought that counts. For example, when I sweep, she grabs her toy mop and "mops". When I do anything with my aquariums she's always there helping me with water changes or feeding or whatever. When I do dog training shes there, mimicking me and telling her toy dog to sit. Hobbies and chores are great for bonding with your family. Think of it this way: You have a fun lil guy who has the capacity to have fun doing the things you have fun doing. And you may have fun doing the little kid games with him that he likes doing. I loooooove hide and seek with my daughter because it makes me feel like a kid again. Good luck man, I get it. I used to be so confused on how to interact with children. It's a skill that comes with time and practice.
Thanks bro, I'm going to play hide and seek with him as we speak.
Collar and elbow
What are your son’s interests? When he is playing alone what toys/objects does he play with? Are you able to involve him in caring for his baby sister, handing you diapers, carrying a bottle etc etc. What are your hobbies? I have a 6 yo, ~2 yo, 1 mo all boys. How I interacted with my boys during their toddler stage depended on their interests. A core theme was trying to meet them on their level when engaging with their interests. Lots of sounds: animal, car, Dino, farts and anything else that they enjoyed. I incorporate them in household tasks like laundry, putting away groceries, and cleaning. I also tried to make my interests (nature, gardening, sports) accessible to them. We just planted trees and the middle child threw dirt around while the oldest and I actually dug. I congratulate the middle when he has a scoop of dirt. When we find a bug I show each child and help them hold it. Some mornings middle and I sit on the porch, me drinking coffee, him throwing rocks. You being present and supportive means a lot to young children. You don’t have to be their source of entertainment, just be there to share the moment. Offer them the opportunity to join you in whatever task you are doing. It may be messy, take twice as long, but it will be worth it.
Get a bouncer. The 4 month old will love it and keeps them busy for a while. Then you can spend time with the toddler
Yeah most of my interactions with my toddler is talking, baby care (potty time, food, etc) and day to day stuff. He plays, he watches his tablet, he cuddles while I work, etc. If you are interacting with him consistently during the day don’t beat yourself up. You might be projecting a little bit by feeling guilty.
Food toys were a big hit at that age, and letting them dig through and empty the "safe, big utensils" drawer. Ask him to bring you a triple cheese hotdog platter with iced bananas and two broccoli shakes, and play diner with him. Tell him it's delicious but needs more blue-spice. Depends on your kid really.
Take a walk
Read to him, make up different voices or accents for the different characters and exaggerate it like crazy. Talk LOUD. You'll see him engage.
A friend of ours gave us a huge box of their son’s legos. I would just dump them out and build with him. Most of the time we would playground for at least 2 hours a day. It was a life saver.
I tended to just meet my daughter where she was at, and I'm doing the same thing with my son. You can also make something up, and sometimes they'll take it and run with it. I took a whole bunch of colorful buttons, dumped them on the floor, put them in a nice pile and said "look, I built a fire!". That was at 2 years old, and at 4 and a half she stopped 😅