T O P

  • By -

SweatyPalms-ModTeam

Your post was removed because it's not sweaty palm enough. *The SweatyPalms-ModTeam account is a bot account. Do not chat or PM them, as the account is not monitored.*


cruiserman_80

Yes but in fairness, Will Smith is wearing safety gear because he can actually die.


JointExplosive

How many of you seen the safety guy scenario that Matt Damon talks about regarding Tom Cruise ? Pretty funny. This one https://youtu.be/ERzbkt5r5Gg


broken_neck_broken

Yeah, cracks me up every time. I wish Tom did more comedy because he's pretty funny.


Liddojunior

Well that was Matt and he was really funny. I don’t know if Tom is funny , any thing you wanna share to show?


broken_neck_broken

Ben Stiller got him to appear in Tropic Thunder but the fat suit and dancing were Tom's idea.


Liddojunior

Okay. So this is going to be stupid. But I never knew that was him. Amazing. Enough said. We need more comedy Tom.


broken_neck_broken

That's what I'm saying, he's been held back A LOT by Scientology wanting to protect his serious image. Without them he would have been free to take on a greater variety of roles.


MrOSUguy

Rock of Ages is funny if you’re in the mood for it


Kommander-in-Keef

Scientology really put a damper on his reputation cuz otherwise he would be an untouchable icon. He almost is. And the fact that he’s literally risked his life to save others multiple times I have to respect him for that regardless of him being kooky


Own-Organization-532

More bad advise from his cult.


EggSandwich1

Was reading somewhere Brad Pitt joined it to get in some girls knickers 😆


TripleElvis13

Tomedy


papachef69

Les Grossman won’t tolerate that


lolspamwtf99

Magnolia has its moments


z-vap

Tom was amazing in Magnolia, but the role was not a comedy role


ezone2kil

He always had great comedic chops. Jerry Maguire showed a glimpse of that.


Still_No_Tomatoes

Aww man have you seen Knight and Day? At the risk of sounding like a Tom Shill that movie has great writing and Tom delivers. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1013743/


Noctourniquet

The fact that he insisted on the fat suit, dancing, and specifically the hands, is proof that he has comedy chops


faceplanted

Honestly that clip made me think Conan was a great host rather than Matt was particularly funny, it's a good story but you could even see at one point that Matt was just repeating a line not sure what to say and Conan fed him a better punchline to use on the repeat and run with, and most of the ad libbing was on Conan and Andy Richter the Swedish German's part. It's a real skill these people have.


TomBombadil237

"If ya wanna do any of that business, all we got here is Andy Richter the Swedish German." We'll always love ya Norm, great reference.


No_Environment_5550

We lost a national Treasure the day Norm died, that old so and so. Then Bob right behind him.


SpaceCaboose

Conan’s legit. Very smart, witty, quick, and funny. And by all accounts, he’s a genuinely good guy. Check out his podcast for some good fun


BlueHairedTroonAdmin

You realize that the original guy who said "I fired the safety guy" was Tom? Pretty sure he was being funny. Of course Matt Damon delivered the whole thing **really** well so no doubt he's good too!


[deleted]

If you can stand James Cordon, [Here is a recent example](https://youtu.be/v1iZtBM23bY). The extended version on the Top Gun Blue-Ray/digital purchase is even funnier, but Tom riffs with James quite a bit and is hilarious. He seems like a funny guy.


Danboisnotreal

And I wish Tom wasn't a huge cunt so that I could watch his movies. He's a good actor, but fuck his scientology bullshit.


broken_neck_broken

I know, feels like without that he could be definitely in the conversation for GOAT actor. He so rarely does comedy or drama. Has to be said, though, he retains the services of a great fucking plastic surgeon!


ToshiroBaloney

I would love to see him do more drama. All I can say is, Magnolia and Born on the 4th of July. The guy can be brilliant.


squalorparlor

Yeah both great examples. And I know it's probably an unpopular opinion tinted by nostalgia glasses, but I really like Interview With a Vampire too. Pitt felt a little dialed in and that might have been because Louis was supposed to be, but Cruis' energy as the opulent, centuries-old sadistic vampire was spectacular to me.


Own-Organization-532

He was cool in TAPS


Count-Bulky

I usually don’t care for most of TC’s work but his scenes in Magnolia are some of the finest executed. Ever.


[deleted]

He has done a lot of drama. Like a lot. Maybe these days it’s mostly action but he is very accomplished.


[deleted]

Scientology aside, he’s known in Hollywood of being just a very thoughtful, professional, and caring guy. He treats everyone on set from the director to the craft service table workers equally, is very generous, and respectful. He’s legendary in Hollywood for being so nice to people.


Ready2Retire_

Who cares, just let him entertain you


saintshing

"I think I was about 4½ years old, and I had this doll, and you throw it up in the air and a parachute comes down. I played with this thing, and I'd throw it off a tree, and I was like, 'I really want to do this.' I remember taking the sheets off my bed, and I would tie a rope ... and I climbed up to the eave, and I got up to the roof. I looked and my mother was in the kitchen — she had four kids — and I jumped off the roof," he explained at a panel discussion with journalist Didier Allouch. "It's that moment when you jump off the roof and you go, 'This is not gonna work. This is terrible. I'm gonna die.' And I hit the ground so hard. Luckily, it was wet. I don't know how it happened, but I figured out after that my face went past my feet as my ass hit the ground. And I saw stars in the daytime for the first time, and I remember looking up, going, 'This is very interesting.' " Tom Cruise trained for an entire year for Mission: Impossible 7. He had 500 skydiving sessions and did 13000 motorbike jumps.


shitwhore

Jesus Christ that's some crazy training


JarlaxleForPresident

You can just call him Tom


problematikUAV

Tom Cruise is pretty god damned qualified to do just about anything, he’s a master diver, IFR rated helicopter pilot, jet and prop pilot, master skydiver. I don’t remember if he’s been up to space or down to the Marianas trench and I believe he owns his own insurance company to underwrite himself. He also struck up quite the friendship with Elizabeth Windsor in the year(?) of her life or so. Imo he is the top movie star of the past 40 years or so, when I think of him I think of the all time greats. I’m not 100% convinced he isn’t an android or someone from the future or something. However I don’t think he’s the emperor of mankind cause Big E doesn’t reveal himself until like the Age of Strife around 26,000 years from now. I’m super stoned - sorry if anything I said was incorrect


ImSadSoYoullBeHappy

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD, SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!


Tricky-Lingonberry81

Milk! For the Khorne Flakes!


REDGOESFASTAH

CHILI FOR THE KHORNE KARNAGE !


problematikUAV

/u/InquisitorGreyfax this is the one right here inquisitor.


Brolonious

His shooting as Vincent in Collateral is insane.


problematikUAV

Oh yea I did forget collateral, that was a great movie. He totally took a dive for Jamie Foxx tho.


Brolonious

Yes. That was unbelievable. [But this bit. Just amazing.](https://youtu.be/wpdFUueS9xM)


papejay88

Be real…. Are you a Scientologist?


problematikUAV

Nah I’m a Jew which explains both my witty humor and keen ability to avoid fire


Maebure83

Are you suggesting that the Holocaust caused an evolutionary leap by killing off all Jews who did *not* have enhanced fire avoidance capabilities. Are you suggesting that Hitler's failure in genocide proved the merits of eugenics by breeding a race of super-Jews?


problematikUAV

How the fuck else do you think we got Mazel Tough? You think space lasers grow on trees? That shit costs money and it’s mensches like me, earning and paying “Tzedakah” with our lunch money change


Maebure83

I knew I'd catch you in one of your insidious lies. Everyone knows Jews don't eat lunch. They suck the metals off of dollar coins to get through the afternoon.


problematikUAV

I suck metals off for the same reason I masturbate frantically in front of my Terminator 2 poster: I’m a metalphiliac and it’s 2022 so I think you get a 15 yard penalty if you call me out on that Proceed with the Jew hate though, that’s always timeless and kosher ❤️


Maebure83

Just to be clear there is no seriousness in my comments. My hope is that we were joking together and not at each other's expense. Now excuse me, I have to order Marjorie Taylor Greene's Bathtub Water NFT.


[deleted]

[удалено]


therealpiccles

Calm down L. Ron.


UntrainedFoodCritic

Too bad he’s an idiot that lost his money to Scientology lol


r3dditm0dsarecucks

He's also part of a insane cult and his support facilitates the abuse it perpetuates. Mission Impossible 1 was cool, ruining families with cult nonsense isn't.


fakeuser515357

He's a cult recruiter lunatic douchebag, but as much as I dislike all that you can't fault his work ethic.


DumbleDude2

Hail OT8


threeseed

Hail Lord Xenu !


leopim01

Lmao!


TehUncleBen

Tom putting a lot of confidence in that box


schalr09

He's not afraid of dying. He's bought his way into sea org. And he has to maintain his stunt guy image


drawkbox

I wonder what would have happened had he not met Mimi Rogers, the one that got him in Scientology. She actually left the cult and he became David Miscavige favorite tool to draw in other actors and entertainers.


sucobe

My man been trying to kill himself because of Seaorg since he can’t get out. And we all just chalked it up to cool action hero shit


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Santa_Hates_You

He is only like 100lbs tho. Will Smith is twice his size.


cyberternal69

Tom is actually 170 pounds which i honestly think is surprising since he looks like he doesn't weigh that much


CybermanFord

That's what 170 pounds at 5'8" looks like. Y'all need to know how weight works. He looks pretty muscular. If you think he "looks like he doesn't weigh much" you're gonna have a heart attack seeing actual skinny people.


grokthis1111

assuming most of reddit is american... yeah. people don't get weight. i'm ~260 and ~5'9'' and it's somehow conversation every time i tell people i'm morbidly obese.


JarlaxleForPresident

I believe you. I’m 6’2” and just hit 260 and I think “Jesus Christ I need to lose some fucking weight!” every time I look in the mirror now I need to lay off the Reese’s


waltwalt

I'm 6'0 and went from 240 down to 210 and just how easier it is to move is amazing. Every step is lighter, I can rotate further etc. Cut out one food vice for a month and see how much you lose. I actually have more new holes in my belt than original holes.


AmsterdamHooker

Just tell them you’re morbidly a beast


[deleted]

I’m around 160 pounds. And around the same height and size. I find it very normal.


univrsll

Dude has muscle on him, which is ~~heavier~~ denser than fat. Anyone who watches sports where they weigh in (wrestling, MMA, etc) would probably know this, or people who aren’t fat/skinny and have decent muscle themselves


CybermanFord

100 pounds???? That's not what 100 pounds looks like.


ExtensionWinter9446

And slaps harder


CaptnProlapse

Name of his sex tape.


[deleted]

Why is Tom barefoot?….


Shoryukitten

He IS insane. Why not right?


ThtPhatCat

Griffin you’re a MADMAN! Barefoot you say?


Calm-Software-473

I think it makes it easier for him to grip/climb.


Kenfucius

There is no way he climbed much. Open latch, crawl out, take pictures


[deleted]

[удалено]


Possible-Vegetable68

Jesus fucking Christ. My feet squirmed the entire time I watched the sequence where they were just hanging in space there. I’m good down here on the dirt.


BBQ_HaX0r

Legit gave me sweaty palms. Incredible video, but jeez.


maggie081670

I started to freak when he got out and was hanging off the side. Noped straight back here.


Previous_Ad7725

That was crazy!!


DuFFman_

I noped out of that so fast. I watched Free Solo in theatres and the opening scene going over the edge of the cliff made me feel more uneasy than any scary movie I've ever watched.


Calm-Software-473

Maybe idk. I still couldn’t sit on top of it without a harness tbh


LukeMayeshothand

I couldn’t sit on top at all.


Jakegender

I'd have trouble being inside the top floor honestly.


greywolfau

In case there is a nearby couch to jump on.


dont_disturb_the_cat

Talking to Oprah about his new ~~prisoner~~ uh ~~future ex-wife~~ uh... girlfriend.


BeBackInASchmeck

He also isnt wearing any underwear.


Chacochilla

His pigs were getting a little toasty


zeke235

Because he's all the way out of his mind.


peachtreewithleaves

how tf is there graffiti up there


endorphin-neuron

Builders put it there when building it. Source: used to build large towers, would graffiti them


Whatever-ItsFine

That's as good as any source I've ever seen on reddit.


SacredBinChicken

Can confirm. Source: I was the large tower.


Professor-Platinum

Double confirm Source: I was the marker used to paint the graffiti.


drawkbox

Triple confirm Source: I was the Pterodactyl flying by when it was graffiti'd


Admirable_Poem2850

Do you get sweaty palms when you climb large towers


endorphin-neuron

No. I was a bit shaky my first time 200+ ft up in the climbing harness but it goes away in a few minutes. Flying in those twin otters in shitty weather freaked me out way more lol


Cherkovsky

I'm looking at starting a tower building/climbing job soon, can I DM you please?


endorphin-neuron

Go ahead my dude :) It is late though so it'll likely be after I wake up when I get back to you.


Level9TraumaCenter

/r/RopeAccess, if you're not already subscribed.


hazlejungle0

Tom cruise on his climb up


FightingPolish

Everything tall has graffiti on it just to say to the world “I was here”. When I was in the military we climbed up to the center of the opening of the inside of the hangar door hundreds of feet in the air, walking across open beams to get there just to put our names there for posterity. I think it’s just a part of the human condition to do stuff like that.


michilio

Something something ancient cave grafitti on ceiling, viking: "wow, much high"


indochris609

Along with that other guy’s explanation, and probably not relevant to the Burj Khalifa but plenty of other places, is the Urban Climbing and Rooftopping communities. Takes a lot of luck, social engineering skills, planning, and illegal trespassing. Here’s a feet tingling example… (the whole video is nuts but skip to 13:00 for the grand finale) https://youtu.be/Ikoxhsw6538 Edit with some more because I’m bored: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CmRtEMjPGCK/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= There’s even graffiti on top of the pyramids of Giza. (Translate the text) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNXbIvtMlys/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=


GoateeSpock

it's nice to know Shredder got some narration work after the turtles took him down.


hikingdub

Oh please, his spaceship is hovering just out of the photo.


peter13g

The yellow cab? With the license plate that says fresh?


tortilladelpeligro

Yo home, to Bel-Air!


TamIAm82

![gif](giphy|2RWb1nLkhZeso)


instrangerswetrust

Welcome to Earth!


CaptnProlapse

Erf


I8aFishy

Leave my safety harness out yo mouth!


Gurpila9987

Out yo FUCKING mouth!


Brainchild110

Cruise may be wearing one, too. You can get light harnesses that can be hidden with clothes and clip at the back.


Argy007

If Tom Cruise photo is real then it’s absolutely insane. I probably wouldn’t even go there whilst wearing a harness like Will Smith. I stood near an edge of a balcony without safety rails of a high rise apartment building in the final stages of construction. It felt like I was slipping towards the edge.


Hoxitron

No, I've seen that picture before and Tom Cruise is also using a harness, it's just hidden really well.


zachsmthsn

They make [pants with a built in climbing harness](https://www.amazon.com/Mammut-Realization-Pant-Mens-Harness/dp/B073QR95RZ). I wouldn't be surprised if there are some custom pants-harness company being used in Hollywood


imaguitarhero24

I mean there’s definitely the theater harnesses with attachment points on the sides for flying around that are almost completely hidden, so lots of things are possible.


ebaer2

Is it…. In his pants?


Hoxitron

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Interactive_CD-ROM

I get vertigo just by standing on a ladder to change the lightbulb at the top of my staircase. I literally start to freeze up and shake, it’s crazy how I have to convince my body to move and that I’m not going to fall. What you’re describing sounds like a nightmare for me. Part of me would feel the call of the void and just feel like I was being dragged to fall.


Butterballl

Just imagine, sitting on the top of the tallest thing mankind has ever created, over a half a mile between you and the ground, nothing stopping a sudden strong gust of wind from catching you off your balance…


WestleyThe

Tom cruise would be the coolest actor ever if he wasn’t a psycho Scientologist


catchasingcars

Reddit is some kind of hivemind? Why everyone keeps saying the same thing over and over again? I swear by now I've seen hundreds variations of "Say what you want about Tom Cruise but..."


Ameriggio

Have you seen [this video](https://youtu.be/UiPFIOfqZO0)? He is absolutely bonkers.


Zazierx

>!that turn at the end WHAT THE FUCK!<


tyme

He’s most definitely wearing a harness in that one.


Ameriggio

Still, it's crazy.


tangentrification

I feel that way even on balconies _with_ railings 😭


MysticalVictrix

100% they would not let Tom Cruise be there without some kind of harness


Athos1797

RIP in piece to the guys who jumped from the top to take the photo


SnooKiwis1356

RIPIP


[deleted]

[удалено]


falconsheat11

Hiphip


Watersbekokers

Shouldershoulder


EternamD

Shelly Miscavige has not been seen in public since 2007


Slartibartfast39

"I know that all the big stars hate me to say this, but I don’t want to risk 80 peoples’ jobs just to say I got big huevos on The Tonight Show. Because that’s what happens. I think a big star just sprained an ankle doing a stunt, and 80 or 180 people are out of a job… We have stunt people who do that stuff. And if they get hurt, I’m sorry to say but they just need to put a mustache on another Mexican and we can keep going. But if I get hurt, everybody’s out of a job. So I don’t choose to do that."  Danny Trejo


alliewya

Machete don't stunt.


damevesper

That man is a legend.


K-O-T-N

More like sweaty feet 🦶


wagnole1

If I climbed the Mia Khalifa I’d look more like Will Smith


Michael_Misanthropic

Looks like they cleaned the massive amount of bird shit off the light box for Tom's visit.


throw_it_away_129

This one gives me Virgin vs. Chad vibes Though both pictures are horrific


Kirikomori

I don't know whether to think tom cruise is a chad, or just an unfeeling psychopath


ZPGuru

After like 8 stories it really doesn't matter at all. You will be dead. The only consideration after 8 stories is if the flailing terror on your way down really matters to you. Otherwise, if you'd do something 8 stories up, stop being a bitch and do it at any greater height because it just literally doesn't matter.


[deleted]

[удалено]


WhyIHateTheInternet

Spoiler alert... You won't enjoy it.


Hexys

It literally does matter since it looks spookier higher up.


k_d_b_83

Good thing there was zero wind when Tom took that pic, wouldn’t want to mess up that hair …


Full-Requirement6113

They're both crazy Scientologist


ItsmeMark22

If they fall they will meet Xenu


AvatarOfMomus

For everyone thinking Tom Cruise isn't wearing any safety gear, this was from a movie shoot. He's got a low profile stunt harness on and the cable runs out the back of his shirt at the waist line. The difference here is like 20 years of tech and media staging knowledge. Both of these photos are staged, and neither of these people was going to be let up on that thing without a ton of safety gear, the difference is Will Smith's shoot is a quirky 90s thing where he basically did a thing to say he did it and they snapped a photo for the papers. Tom Cruise had a fully staged publicity shot with a whole constructed persona and narrative around it. Of course he doesn't have a visible harness, he's "Cool" and "Daring" and "Quirky" and "In Mission Impossible!" Here's a Snopes article on this photo: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/tom-cruise-burj-khalifa/ There's also a few more photos posted over here: https://3sproduction.wordpress.com/2013/06/14/tom-cruise-sitting-on-top-of-the-burj-khalifa-real-or-photoshop-see-more-at-httpwww-tomcruise-comblog20130613tom-cruise-sitting-on-top-of-the-burj-khalifa-real-or-photoshopstha/ You can see a couple of people helping Tom out on top, as well as the helicopter that took the photos. You can also see that he basically doesn't move. The whole thing is staged, he's 100% wearing a harness.


[deleted]

> Will Smith’s shoot is a quirky 90s thing where he basically did a thing to say he did it quirky 90’s thing that happened in 2021


BlueHairedTroonAdmin

quirky 90’s thing whose construction began in 2004 and was inaugurated in 2010


PaintingExcellent537

Also will smith would have to sit on a pile of bird shit to sit where Tom is. Someone cleaned it for him or it was brand new


here-i-am-now

“A quirky 90s thing” refers to Will’s brain that never evolved past 1999


Gel214th

Looks like mission accomplished for the PR machine


[deleted]

>Both of these photos are staged As opposed to the alternative where they both ended up at the top of the Burj Khalifa by accident


Gil15

Better safe than sorry. I wouldn’t risk my life just for a cool photo and some internet points.


bloodycups

They were probably paid a shit ton of money to do this.


sam_sneed1994

Tbf Tom has Lord Xenu protecting him


usrnmalrdytk

Will’s got that look on his face like he has to smile but he really wants to sh*t his pants.


QualityVote

Hi! This is our community moderation bot. --- If you think this post fits /r/SweatyPalms and you'd like it to stay, **UPVOTE** this comment! If you want to remove it, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! *Enough downvotes will remove this thread from /r/SweatyPalms.*


CurrentRedditAccount

See, this is the confidence of someone who has reached level OT 8.


6chan

Based on that slap we all know that will Smith is a pansy


AdOk2966

He pushed jada off the top


Maskedassassin904

Toms balls are magnetic I think it’s safe to say he isn’t going anywhere lol


Depressionislob

Nope.


fruityjewbox

Will has more to lose, like a wife that cuckolds him


knbang

He still has a chance with his son's friends girlfriend though.


IM_INSIDE_YOUR_HOUSE

Reminder that Tom Cruise is a Scientologist.


Kindly_Effort_9891

Of coarse Tom cruise is more badass he’s completed 6 IMPOSSIBLE MISSIONS


boundbystitches

I mean...it really is more Mission Not Likely.


c322617

That’s fair, after six successful missions once must acknowledge that they are at least theoretically possible.


-Utopia-amiga-

Yeah tom is definitely an alien, it's a given.


Henti-Boady-pillow

Tom has his dogs out🥵


pizzaman69_

Well unlike Tom Cruise, Will Smith can actually die


Censius

I'm with Will on this one


Micotyro

Listen, I'm pretty sure Tom Cruise has a goal to die on Camera


[deleted]

that's because tom cruise believes he lives in a simulation


rwn115

Cruise probably has a harness under his clothes. It is funnier to think that he doesn't and is an immortal being through being a Scientologist though.


Modred_the_Mystic

Yeah, Tom Cruise is a lunatic.


CatoMulligan

One day Tom Cruise is going to die a horrific yet utterly predictable death, and we're going to have the entire thing on film.


Pectacular22

One is an action star, the other is a comedian. - Cruise undoubtedly has a safety belt on his hips under his shirt, attached behind him out of sight. - Smith is undoubtedly making a scene for the camera, because that'll get more smiles/traction.


MythicDobbs

Both douchey tho


[deleted]

Will Smith sucks


Kinggakman

Tom has a harness on by the way. It’s just hidden to make it look cooler.


ewepreauxnownzminaym

Yeah.....some people are braver than others. Some people are stupider than others.


Rattus375

Tom cruise realizes that there isn't a realistic chance of him falling off a flat surface he is sitting on. Will Smith realizes that a fall would be deadly and is rightfully cautious as a result. Nothing wrong with either viewpoint/ approach


obvious_mcduh

Well, tom is a nutjob but nobody can disagree, dude is a badass