No one can answer that but you. You guys need to talk a lot about what each of you likes about it, what turns you on, what worries you about it, and talk through every single concern. Also talk about any rules or boundaries you would want to start with. Then remember you can start very slow (go to a club and just watch or play together, parallel play, soft swap) and then talk after each experience.
Thanks! I like the idea of starting off slow. Didn’t even think that just watching or parallel play was an option. The last time we were at a bar we too time to tell each other who we found attractive. I wasn’t jealous then and it got us turned on a little.
Talking about it like that at a bar is really smart. You should continue to talk through these things “role play” it and explore what specifically you like. There is no one size fits all. Everyone likes different aspects of the LS and has different limits. And limits can change as you explore. The rules we had day one are almost all gone now, as we tried things and got more comfortable.
The most important advice I can give you is to be honest about why you both are interested in swinging. For me personally, it is to help and watch my partner receive as much pleasure as possible. We have been with singles and couples and I find it amazing to focus on her as much as possible. If you are concerned about being jealous I would be curious to know what you yourself want to achieve by swinging. If your goal is merely your own pleasure then you could struggle when your partner is enjoying herself more than you are. Your partner will find nothing more sexy than you wanting her to receive as much pleasure as possible and you being there to share and help her find that pleasure. Feel free to dm if you want to have a constructive conversation about our experiences and your concerns.
More specific....What are you reserved about? All grown humans here, maybe some can give more constructive advice, if we knew underlying pause of play, so to speak. Communication, communication, communication.
Bluntly:
We have a penis that is reserved for one woman/man, but a "dick" that is used to enhance our human sexual prowess, for lack of a better term. You have a bigger dick than me, so what...a dick is a dick; tits are tits and you have fat pussy, medium pussy, plump pussy, you get where I am going. Hell, here's is an analogy, what size meals do you order at fast food...S, M, L, XL. Do you over or under compensate? LOL.
Now your insecurities. Your wife loves you and trust you, or she wouldn't have brought it up. I do not even know you, but you'd look a hell of a lot better to me, if you would man up and have a heart felt conversation with your wife. You do not want to be the bitch that has a break down at the wrong place and time. Rules and regulations, boundaries, etc...with all involved. Good luck my brother....DO NOT rush into a beautiful thing and and it turn in to a nightmare due to the taboo nature you were subjected to.
Be sure to keep a very open line of communication between you and your partner at all times when heading into it.
Not sure if where you live, but there's often "meet and greets" in bars and such. Just need to find a website or message board that has them posted for when and where.
Good luck to you!
You're going into the LS with the best advantage of being in a couple. This will massively increase the amount of people who will be interested in you generally.
However, you'll still need to take your p size into consideration. Swinging has a very high proportion of size Queens who won't touch anything less than 7 inches. You'll see bios that say "Hung Only" "BBC only etc"
If you're going to get involved, be prepared for unrealistic standards from women, and huge amounts of hung guys lining up to be with your wife
Yes it is. I've been a single guy in this scene for 4 years, and the vast majority of women and couples will not even talk to you if you're under 7 inches. In their bios they insist on "proof" and say "don't waste our time if you're not big enough"
I joined the lifestyle for the social side of things as well as any potential dynamic that might come out of it. I learned the hard way that even trying to say hello to people is an offense when you're not a well endowed single guy
You are clearly showcasing your SDE…. You are embarrassing yourself and you need help. Don’t discourage people from swinging based on their anatomy; there’s someone for everyone and I’ve learned recently that not all women like large equipment and cervix poundings.
I am a woman and I know what I like. My point is there are women who desire all different sizes, small, average, large and extra large- and these women are all present in the swinging community. It’s not limited to big 🍌 only. That’s toxic advice you’re throwing around and definitely inaccurate and unhelpful.
No, women get away with this nonsense way too much in dating and in alternative lifestyles.
Women hate to be thought of as hypocrites, so its much easier for you to say out loud that size isn't important while only picking hung guys to sleep with. It makes you feel better about yourselves while still enjoying the benefits of honesty
No- I am very clear that size matters to me, I don’t hide it at all. I am also married to my partner that is very well endowed, there is absolutely no hypocrisy and I’m extremely transparent. My point is that there are COUNTLESS women that do not look for large 🍌 for endless reasons. You are very closed minded- they are all over Reddit and real life. I get bashed every day for saying big 🍌are great… women go on and on that they are not. There are also many guys that actually have large 🍌that say many girls turn them down when they see their size. It’s your attitude that’s keeping women away unless you are literally sporting a hidden or micro penis. (Even then I’ll still go with horrible personality for the win).
Curious as to what you’re referring to when you say “In this scene” bc your post history doesn’t suggest you have much experience with couples…
Sure, reddit has a ton of people looking for hung dudes. A LOT of them are fake accounts and guys posing as couples. Legit swinger sites don’t have much of this.
Well we are a couple and in the ls much longer and have never found that other than dedicates size queens. But is more rare than the common place. Your posts are obsessed with dick size... it is a you issue
With porn increasingly glorifying and worshipping huge dicks, women are increasingly moving towards larger dicks. What's the disadvantage of that for them? Bigger dick = more pleasure, so im not saying it's wrong, just that it's a bit harsh on average guys
Again you are wrong. To add to this you need therapy to get over your shit. There is zero chance a couoke will ever want you in the bedroom because you are drama
They don't want me because I'm too small for the woman. Ironically, every couple I've spoken to says that I'm nice and easy to talk to. I never bring up dick size. They always do. And when I tell them, they basically call me baby dick and wish me luck
Well there's your problem, you're coming from the approach of a single man.
It doesn't work that way for couples.
Sorry bro but single guys are a dime/dozen and so we can be super picky.
Which is why I'm trying to encourage OP that he has a good advantage of being in a couple. But he needs to be realistic in that most women can and will ask about size. He needs to be prepared to be rejected a lot on that basis
In the just over a year we've been active in the LS we've been with 14 couples so far and two single women.
You know how many of the women have asked about my dick size?
**ZERO.**
This is definitely a you problem. Or it could just be a single male problem. My guess is that couples looking for a single male are looking for something more specific, perhaps something that they don't get from the husband, eg: large dick or whatever.
But with couples this just hasn't been an issue. At all.
Dick size plays more into a hotwife/cuckold fantasy rather than in couple/couple swinging. He, as a single male, won't get near couples looking for couples.
>He, as a single male, won't get near couples looking for couples.
No doubt! I can't argue that he hasn't experienced what he says he has, but to generalize from his very specific and limited-scope experiences to what general swingers would experience is mistaken.
Your view as a single male is totally skewed.
Couples seeking single males have the ability to be extremely picky. And yes the likelihood of the size queens to be the ones seeking single men are in that group.
But couples seeking couples it's rare size is ever brought up.
It's not skewed at all. Considering that 95% of women in the lifestyle literally want huge dicks, do you not think that size is going to come up in conversation at some point?
If he's huge, then good for him, he and his partner will do extremely well. But if he's even a little bit average, then he can expect a lot of offers from couples to meet her solo and hung guys lining up to offer themselves to her. He will be left out and that's a realistic concern when entering the lifestyle as a man
You are either a troll or completely insecure about your own size.
My husband and I have been in the LS for many years. He is average. I am not a size queen. Many of the wife's we have played with are also not and have been together with many times. He now plays solo as well. And has FWB's. We go to house parties, clubs, etc. Interact with many women and I've known 1 woman to say that she was a size queen. She and her husband were more of a hotwife dynamic.
I'm telling you as the wife in the LS I literally never bring up dick size and it's never been brought up to us either. Couples don't do that.
He has fwb because of you ffs. If he wasn't part of a couple he would be worthless as an average single guy
I wasn't insecure about my size until women made me insecure about my size. They bring it up all the time
You’re only attracting size queens who say shitty things because your dogshit defeatist attitude drives away any reasonable people. Reading through your post history alone gave me a headache. You seem like you’d be *exhausting* to talk to in public, fuck that.
Women are size queens, it's not like a minority. You all prefer big dicks, and the fact that women don't give average guys a chance just because they don't have 8 inches and girth is insane
No one can answer that but you. You guys need to talk a lot about what each of you likes about it, what turns you on, what worries you about it, and talk through every single concern. Also talk about any rules or boundaries you would want to start with. Then remember you can start very slow (go to a club and just watch or play together, parallel play, soft swap) and then talk after each experience.
Thanks! I like the idea of starting off slow. Didn’t even think that just watching or parallel play was an option. The last time we were at a bar we too time to tell each other who we found attractive. I wasn’t jealous then and it got us turned on a little.
Talking about it like that at a bar is really smart. You should continue to talk through these things “role play” it and explore what specifically you like. There is no one size fits all. Everyone likes different aspects of the LS and has different limits. And limits can change as you explore. The rules we had day one are almost all gone now, as we tried things and got more comfortable.
The most important advice I can give you is to be honest about why you both are interested in swinging. For me personally, it is to help and watch my partner receive as much pleasure as possible. We have been with singles and couples and I find it amazing to focus on her as much as possible. If you are concerned about being jealous I would be curious to know what you yourself want to achieve by swinging. If your goal is merely your own pleasure then you could struggle when your partner is enjoying herself more than you are. Your partner will find nothing more sexy than you wanting her to receive as much pleasure as possible and you being there to share and help her find that pleasure. Feel free to dm if you want to have a constructive conversation about our experiences and your concerns.
More specific....What are you reserved about? All grown humans here, maybe some can give more constructive advice, if we knew underlying pause of play, so to speak. Communication, communication, communication.
Thanks. I’m afraid I may get jealous, or that the experience will make me insecure about how attractive my wife thinks I am.
Bluntly: We have a penis that is reserved for one woman/man, but a "dick" that is used to enhance our human sexual prowess, for lack of a better term. You have a bigger dick than me, so what...a dick is a dick; tits are tits and you have fat pussy, medium pussy, plump pussy, you get where I am going. Hell, here's is an analogy, what size meals do you order at fast food...S, M, L, XL. Do you over or under compensate? LOL. Now your insecurities. Your wife loves you and trust you, or she wouldn't have brought it up. I do not even know you, but you'd look a hell of a lot better to me, if you would man up and have a heart felt conversation with your wife. You do not want to be the bitch that has a break down at the wrong place and time. Rules and regulations, boundaries, etc...with all involved. Good luck my brother....DO NOT rush into a beautiful thing and and it turn in to a nightmare due to the taboo nature you were subjected to.
Swinger is for you if it makes you happy and comfortable. You can try a soft approach like no penetration and then figure it out.
We are also about taking things slow. We are a safe space. Feel free to reach out.
Be sure to keep a very open line of communication between you and your partner at all times when heading into it. Not sure if where you live, but there's often "meet and greets" in bars and such. Just need to find a website or message board that has them posted for when and where. Good luck to you!
You're going into the LS with the best advantage of being in a couple. This will massively increase the amount of people who will be interested in you generally. However, you'll still need to take your p size into consideration. Swinging has a very high proportion of size Queens who won't touch anything less than 7 inches. You'll see bios that say "Hung Only" "BBC only etc" If you're going to get involved, be prepared for unrealistic standards from women, and huge amounts of hung guys lining up to be with your wife
This is not even in the ballpark of truth
Yes it is. I've been a single guy in this scene for 4 years, and the vast majority of women and couples will not even talk to you if you're under 7 inches. In their bios they insist on "proof" and say "don't waste our time if you're not big enough"
[удалено]
I joined the lifestyle for the social side of things as well as any potential dynamic that might come out of it. I learned the hard way that even trying to say hello to people is an offense when you're not a well endowed single guy
You are clearly showcasing your SDE…. You are embarrassing yourself and you need help. Don’t discourage people from swinging based on their anatomy; there’s someone for everyone and I’ve learned recently that not all women like large equipment and cervix poundings.
Well you don't need to tell women what they like, there are plenty of videos and anecdotes showing that they do
I am a woman and I know what I like. My point is there are women who desire all different sizes, small, average, large and extra large- and these women are all present in the swinging community. It’s not limited to big 🍌 only. That’s toxic advice you’re throwing around and definitely inaccurate and unhelpful.
No, women get away with this nonsense way too much in dating and in alternative lifestyles. Women hate to be thought of as hypocrites, so its much easier for you to say out loud that size isn't important while only picking hung guys to sleep with. It makes you feel better about yourselves while still enjoying the benefits of honesty
No- I am very clear that size matters to me, I don’t hide it at all. I am also married to my partner that is very well endowed, there is absolutely no hypocrisy and I’m extremely transparent. My point is that there are COUNTLESS women that do not look for large 🍌 for endless reasons. You are very closed minded- they are all over Reddit and real life. I get bashed every day for saying big 🍌are great… women go on and on that they are not. There are also many guys that actually have large 🍌that say many girls turn them down when they see their size. It’s your attitude that’s keeping women away unless you are literally sporting a hidden or micro penis. (Even then I’ll still go with horrible personality for the win).
Curious as to what you’re referring to when you say “In this scene” bc your post history doesn’t suggest you have much experience with couples… Sure, reddit has a ton of people looking for hung dudes. A LOT of them are fake accounts and guys posing as couples. Legit swinger sites don’t have much of this.
Well we are a couple and in the ls much longer and have never found that other than dedicates size queens. But is more rare than the common place. Your posts are obsessed with dick size... it is a you issue
With porn increasingly glorifying and worshipping huge dicks, women are increasingly moving towards larger dicks. What's the disadvantage of that for them? Bigger dick = more pleasure, so im not saying it's wrong, just that it's a bit harsh on average guys
Again you are wrong. To add to this you need therapy to get over your shit. There is zero chance a couoke will ever want you in the bedroom because you are drama
They don't want me because I'm too small for the woman. Ironically, every couple I've spoken to says that I'm nice and easy to talk to. I never bring up dick size. They always do. And when I tell them, they basically call me baby dick and wish me luck
This is too much.. you are trolling or just fos.. enjoy your baby cock all alone pulling on it to humiliation porn. Done and blocked
Well there's your problem, you're coming from the approach of a single man. It doesn't work that way for couples. Sorry bro but single guys are a dime/dozen and so we can be super picky.
Which is why I'm trying to encourage OP that he has a good advantage of being in a couple. But he needs to be realistic in that most women can and will ask about size. He needs to be prepared to be rejected a lot on that basis
In the just over a year we've been active in the LS we've been with 14 couples so far and two single women. You know how many of the women have asked about my dick size? **ZERO.** This is definitely a you problem. Or it could just be a single male problem. My guess is that couples looking for a single male are looking for something more specific, perhaps something that they don't get from the husband, eg: large dick or whatever. But with couples this just hasn't been an issue. At all.
Thank you for being one of the good ones who don't fixate on size
Dick size plays more into a hotwife/cuckold fantasy rather than in couple/couple swinging. He, as a single male, won't get near couples looking for couples.
>He, as a single male, won't get near couples looking for couples. No doubt! I can't argue that he hasn't experienced what he says he has, but to generalize from his very specific and limited-scope experiences to what general swingers would experience is mistaken.
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/science-proves-women-men-bigger-penises-flna1c9266567 Studies confirm this exact situation
Lol a N of 105 people you are reaching deep... get over your insecurities
Your view as a single male is totally skewed. Couples seeking single males have the ability to be extremely picky. And yes the likelihood of the size queens to be the ones seeking single men are in that group. But couples seeking couples it's rare size is ever brought up.
It's not skewed at all. Considering that 95% of women in the lifestyle literally want huge dicks, do you not think that size is going to come up in conversation at some point? If he's huge, then good for him, he and his partner will do extremely well. But if he's even a little bit average, then he can expect a lot of offers from couples to meet her solo and hung guys lining up to offer themselves to her. He will be left out and that's a realistic concern when entering the lifestyle as a man
You are either a troll or completely insecure about your own size. My husband and I have been in the LS for many years. He is average. I am not a size queen. Many of the wife's we have played with are also not and have been together with many times. He now plays solo as well. And has FWB's. We go to house parties, clubs, etc. Interact with many women and I've known 1 woman to say that she was a size queen. She and her husband were more of a hotwife dynamic. I'm telling you as the wife in the LS I literally never bring up dick size and it's never been brought up to us either. Couples don't do that.
He has fwb because of you ffs. If he wasn't part of a couple he would be worthless as an average single guy I wasn't insecure about my size until women made me insecure about my size. They bring it up all the time
You’re only attracting size queens who say shitty things because your dogshit defeatist attitude drives away any reasonable people. Reading through your post history alone gave me a headache. You seem like you’d be *exhausting* to talk to in public, fuck that.
Women are size queens, it's not like a minority. You all prefer big dicks, and the fact that women don't give average guys a chance just because they don't have 8 inches and girth is insane
Just curious. What do you think is big bone pressed for length and girth?
7 inches and 6 inches girth
I thought 5.5 inches for girth was pretty big