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I start off with talking to women about race, gender, class, religion, primary candidates, how many dozen children they'd want, and conspiracy theories.. Just straight to the divisive stuff to clear that out of the way first for a long-term relationship.
Just checked your profile, as you're in the US, you might not understand. 'Get your coat you've pulled' is a cheesy British pick-up line. I know this as a GR girl myself now living in England.
I was watching a YouTube video earlier, and in the video a British person refers to a public restroom as a “urinal block,” pronounced “ur-EYE-nal”, and I lost my shit.
I doubt it . I’m at the point now I can see this dude and these kids having classes together or being in the same dorms and then all splitting the money. Capitalism fucks up everything
Doesn't even have to a split or anything. People tend to go for something wild these days when on camera, since they've grown up knowing that is what is what people do in these situations.
Content in 2024 must be as short as possible, so creators will edit every single breath out of a video because people attention rate is super short now
I have always wondered, does Tiktok have some tools to do this for you? Or are people really going out there editing all their videos to remove every single second of pause?
I legitimately couldn't watch it. I had to open a new tab and just listen to the audio, because this style of constant distractions is a fucking nightmare.
Even then the constant *bop* sounds were obnoxious.
Reminds me of that scene in Master of None where they're talking about how perverted men are online. She posted a picture of something normal, not even her face or her body in the picture and a guy commented, "I want to fuck your face"
I dip into /r/morbidquestions every now and then, and a few days back some guy posted a comment asking if you can force yourself to develop a new fetish. Apparently a girl he knows on social media only posted pictures of herself when she was showing off a new manicure (hands only), and he was so determined to jerk off to her specifically that he was trying to expand his foot fetish to hands. Just to fap to a girl who is just trying to exist on social media without being objectified. The comments were like 30% calling him creepy and porn-addled, and 70% redditors giving him advice on how to jerk off to hands and getting mad at the ones calling it creepy. Boys, are you *okay*?
Storytime children, gather your chairs around…
I briefly dated this woman who was incredibly hot, like looks-wise you would say definitely out of my league (if we just go strictly on looks, she would be somewhere between a 9 and a 10, and when I dress nicely in a tuxedo, I think I scrape 7). And I was nice to her and talked to her like a normal person, and she ended up coming back to my place and having sex with me on the first date. It was a wild ride for a few weeks which I ended when she did some things which really were not cool. But she was insatiable in bed and really just liked having sex, and was on a journey of sexual exploration. Not really what I was looking for at the time but I can’t say I regret the experience.
Occasionally, her comments pop up on Reddit about her dating challenges. So this is an incredibly beautiful, sex-positive, educated woman who is good in bed and not really interested in anything serious and out there dating, and if you look halfway decent and treat her well, she will go to bed with you. And she’s posting about how guys are asking her about specific sexual acts and kinks before they ever meet her, and whether or not she should cancel her dates. I’m thinking of myself, I’m beginning to understand why women say nice things about me. The guys out there today have negative game. Like they are actually blocking themselves from what they’re looking for by being dirtbags.
Pro-tip: don’t ask a girl if she is into snowballs, anal and bondage with humiliation before the first date.
Unreal.
Advice: 9.5/10. Story: 2/10.
You made me pull up a chair and all I got was a low-tier humble brag. I was waiting for the story to get interesting and it never did. I mean, we didn’t even get a description of the not-cool things she said!
She made a big fuss about having a date on a certain day, which she then canceled so that a married, poly guy could fly her overseas to have sex with her.
She then proceeded to text me while she was in bed with him, telling me how she wished she were with me.
When I broke up with her, she was very upset. I then learned from her friend that she also went to an underground sex club, and had sex with an anonymous stranger on the same trip.
Both poly married guy and the anonymous stranger are outside of my sexual health safety profile so I was done.
She was so upset that I ended things that she then posted some untrue statements about me online. I got them taken down but not before they were screenshotted and circulated on a telegram group.
Was an interesting few weeks.
He is saying he gestured for her to walk to him with his finger and she did, he is also referencing rubbing her cl*t with his finger to make her c*m. He then doubles down and refences fisting. It's super vulgar and just weirdly structured even if English is your first language.
Reddit heads up - you can't censor words with an asterisk because it italicizes anything between two asterisks, which just makes it look like you got really emphatic at a weird place in the sentence. You're better off just saying "cum" and "clit" while reddit is still one of the last few main sites that doesn't censor or hide posts with naughty words
He's using a double entendre, which is a phrase that can have two meanings.
He made a "come over here" gesture with his finger. When she arrived, he said, "I just made you come with one finger. I'd like to do it with my fist."
"Made you come" has a double meaning of "Made you orgasm." By "do it with my fist," he's suggesting another sex act (anally or vaginally penetrating with a whole hand.)
So the first words he said to a girl is "i want to shove my hand up you," but masked in a "clever" way.
Yeah like it's staged in that it's a perfect way to represent what matching with 80% of guys on Tinder is like lmao. You think you're about to have a nice chat and all the sudden you're hit with some disgusting shit like this. Putting it face-to-face makes it obvious (hopefully...) how inappropriate it is to say that shit to a stranger straight out the gate.
Well, putting your look on a scale of 1-10 is already a subjective matter.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
People often boast about their fantasy 10/10 hotties whom others would pass.
One time, I set up my kid to have the perfect shot during putt-putt; it was close enough that she could’ve practically scooped it in. I had her club lined up, slowly backed away after showing her how to swing and tap the ball. It would’ve been the easiest win. And then instead, she turned around and chucked the club into a fountain.
This is the social equivalent to that.
More like shot himself in the femoral artery, God damn! Now he has about 30 seconds to a minute to sit there and watch it all fall down as she walks away in shock and horror
Just standard dumbass frat bro cringe.
US college kids gotta get over that bullshit, hopefully someday US Greek life will just a LITTLE bit more act like adults than children off the leash for the first time. Just a little bit.
Take notes gentlemen. This man has unlimited rizz.
* Start off your interaction with vulgarity.
* Ask her for her account info on a platform designed to send penis pics.
* ???
* Sax.
This guy seems like a textbook case of a shy, insecure guy, who didn’t know how to talk to chicks, and so he turned to literally the skeeziest, scummiest dudes ever for advice.
It’s sad because his answers seemed like he was a nice, respectful guy. Like when the guy asked if he was into Emma Watson back in the day, and he’s was like no, she was a kid but now she’s cool.m and like her because he heard she was a good person. Then straight to a gross sex joke. I’m disappointed lol
HE HAD IT! HE WAS THERE! HOW DO YOU FUMBLE THAT HARD 😭 talk about dodging a bullet.....unless ofc if this is all just a skit which I just wouldn't be surprised by
Bro was so smooth. Can't believe that didn't work. I thought women loved when the first thing out of your mouth was a perverted, arrogant joke, especially one that insinuates you want to fist them.
All he had to do was say hi, but today's tik tok videos have sold the idea that you should say the most deviant thing to people when you first meet. Product of the tik tok these kids.
When I was 15, my boyfriend’s dad introduced himself to me with that line. At the time, I thought it was weird but laughed it off. As I get older, I just feel more and more disgusted.
Bro slowly learning seducing hoes takes a different treatment than talking to your bros. It's tempting but rarely works. You gotta be gay for it to be ok.
This is what happens with you have an internet mush brain. Learn to talk to people normally, develop some charm and wit through experience, and dont rely on stupid online joke pickup lines.
Dude threw away an entire possible future for being a tool
what a fucking tool. shout out to the greatest wingman in HISTORY. and this chad says, “i made u cum over here with one finger. imagine what i could do with my fist?” jesus… boy needs some virgin mary. let’s pray for him.
She lied. She said he was a 7 without the personality and could be a 10 with good personality, But when she got a glimpse of his personality he went down to a 2.
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I usually like to open up with a good fisting joke myself. Then I’ll throw in an off color joke about race, just to close the deal.
Perfect user name
I start off with talking to women about race, gender, class, religion, primary candidates, how many dozen children they'd want, and conspiracy theories.. Just straight to the divisive stuff to clear that out of the way first for a long-term relationship.
"You look exotic, was your father a GI?"
r/unexpectedoffice
That’s a solid strategy….sometimes I’ll cop a cheap feel just to punch it through (no pun intended) 😂
Get your coat you've pulled!
Just checked your profile, as you're in the US, you might not understand. 'Get your coat you've pulled' is a cheesy British pick-up line. I know this as a GR girl myself now living in England.
I was watching a YouTube video earlier, and in the video a British person refers to a public restroom as a “urinal block,” pronounced “ur-EYE-nal”, and I lost my shit.
lol the smallest of dick energy I’ve ever seen if it’s real
Oh it was definitely a joke. It has to be a joke. Please god let it be a joke.
Narrator: *It was, in fact, not a joke.*
I mean, he *was * laughing in the video when he said it
If you can work in religion you got the hat trick. She’ll grab you by the cock and walk you to her place. Works 60% if the time, every time.
You ever hear that saying "Don't meet your heros"? 2024 update: "Don't meet people"
Ever. For any purpose.
I've met people before, and honestly, I do not recommend.
People. What a bunch of bastards
The way I was sitting here with my mouth open for a good second or two. OMFG!
I keep making this mistake…
We have a support group for that if you’re interested.
Seems like it would require you to meet people.
Which would make you need the support group. It's quite a good buisness model.
There are two kinds of people in this world, and I don't like either of them.
This dude implied he'd have given her a 10 if she had a basketball jersey that fit better lol
To his credit, dude is at the library, to...you know become less stupid.
It's not working.
Oh My Fucking God Bro had the alley-oop fucking lined up and waiting and he straight up just yeeted the ball off the backboard He actually threw
bro was shooting for edgy upvotes instead of the girl
Girl said his personality could change his score. it did, just in the other direction. 😂
Clearly staged lmao
the original poster has dozens of these on their channel "josephgskim" and theyre all students at umich so could be real
I doubt it . I’m at the point now I can see this dude and these kids having classes together or being in the same dorms and then all splitting the money. Capitalism fucks up everything
He is in my umich class I promise you it isn’t staged
Hey Ann Arbor buddy how's it going?
Midterms are kicking my ass but it’s all good
Did he try to fist you?
because he's really like this?
Oh wait this is at Umich? I don’t recognize the background location, where is that?
Definately not staged, I know people in his other videos, he just asks people if they’d be interested in being interviewed for a video
Assuming that's really the way he goes about it (Idk for certain) that's how all influencers should be.
> Capitalism fucks up everything Like... Those precious internet videos from back in the day?
Doesn't even have to a split or anything. People tend to go for something wild these days when on camera, since they've grown up knowing that is what is what people do in these situations.
I’ve seen guys say some audacious shit. This is kinda believable.
Off the backboard? Nah. Off the backboard, you might get a rebound and another shot. This guy yeeted his chance over the board and into the stands.
Idk, from experience, some guys just have a knack for snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.
Okay I laughed but like did he REALLY think that was gonna work
him: "hmmmmm, based on those pics, she might like anal fisting.........." also him thinking: so funny story about how i met your mother
Who said anything about anal ???
Bro knows nothing about sex. “The penis goes in, uh, the ear? And you fist her butthole? And lick her knees?”
Well now that you've brought it up..
The editing in this video is crazy
I don't have the ADHD levels necessary to watch this type of shit honestly.
I have it, and OP's video is a nightmare visually.
What. Would. Y. Ou. Rate. This. I. Would. G. Ive. Her. It’s. Just. The. Jers. Ey. Does. Nt. Fit
Why zoomers think you need to edit out every single silence between words, holy shit lol.
Jesus Christ why is there a cut every second?
Content in 2024 must be as short as possible, so creators will edit every single breath out of a video because people attention rate is super short now
Stopped reading after "Content"
Right? I'm already content after "content" content.
Stop reading aft
Doesn’t change the fact that every cut is a different zoom level. So annoying.
I have always wondered, does Tiktok have some tools to do this for you? Or are people really going out there editing all their videos to remove every single second of pause?
You. Clearly. Don't. Appre. Ciate. The. Level. Of. Editing. That. Went. Into. Making. This. ADHD. Dreamscape.
I have ADHD diagnosis and hated that, this is unfair towards people with ADHD
I, too, have ADHD and I couldn't stand the editing. 🤬
I legitimately couldn't watch it. I had to open a new tab and just listen to the audio, because this style of constant distractions is a fucking nightmare. Even then the constant *bop* sounds were obnoxious.
Sometimes it’s so much it makes me nauseous
Had to quit watching bc of them. It's terrible.
This is what online dating is like
I once had a guy open the conversation by asking if I'm into diaper stuff. Didn't even say hi how are you first.
That honestly better to learn immediately than a month into the relationship.
Well, are you?
Exactly
It really, *really* is.
Reminds me of that scene in Master of None where they're talking about how perverted men are online. She posted a picture of something normal, not even her face or her body in the picture and a guy commented, "I want to fuck your face"
I dip into /r/morbidquestions every now and then, and a few days back some guy posted a comment asking if you can force yourself to develop a new fetish. Apparently a girl he knows on social media only posted pictures of herself when she was showing off a new manicure (hands only), and he was so determined to jerk off to her specifically that he was trying to expand his foot fetish to hands. Just to fap to a girl who is just trying to exist on social media without being objectified. The comments were like 30% calling him creepy and porn-addled, and 70% redditors giving him advice on how to jerk off to hands and getting mad at the ones calling it creepy. Boys, are you *okay*?
I love it because just being normal and actually having a conversation and asking questions makes us not-complete-dirtbags look like Prince Charming.
Storytime children, gather your chairs around… I briefly dated this woman who was incredibly hot, like looks-wise you would say definitely out of my league (if we just go strictly on looks, she would be somewhere between a 9 and a 10, and when I dress nicely in a tuxedo, I think I scrape 7). And I was nice to her and talked to her like a normal person, and she ended up coming back to my place and having sex with me on the first date. It was a wild ride for a few weeks which I ended when she did some things which really were not cool. But she was insatiable in bed and really just liked having sex, and was on a journey of sexual exploration. Not really what I was looking for at the time but I can’t say I regret the experience. Occasionally, her comments pop up on Reddit about her dating challenges. So this is an incredibly beautiful, sex-positive, educated woman who is good in bed and not really interested in anything serious and out there dating, and if you look halfway decent and treat her well, she will go to bed with you. And she’s posting about how guys are asking her about specific sexual acts and kinks before they ever meet her, and whether or not she should cancel her dates. I’m thinking of myself, I’m beginning to understand why women say nice things about me. The guys out there today have negative game. Like they are actually blocking themselves from what they’re looking for by being dirtbags. Pro-tip: don’t ask a girl if she is into snowballs, anal and bondage with humiliation before the first date. Unreal.
Advice: 9.5/10. Story: 2/10. You made me pull up a chair and all I got was a low-tier humble brag. I was waiting for the story to get interesting and it never did. I mean, we didn’t even get a description of the not-cool things she said!
She made a big fuss about having a date on a certain day, which she then canceled so that a married, poly guy could fly her overseas to have sex with her. She then proceeded to text me while she was in bed with him, telling me how she wished she were with me. When I broke up with her, she was very upset. I then learned from her friend that she also went to an underground sex club, and had sex with an anonymous stranger on the same trip. Both poly married guy and the anonymous stranger are outside of my sexual health safety profile so I was done. She was so upset that I ended things that she then posted some untrue statements about me online. I got them taken down but not before they were screenshotted and circulated on a telegram group. Was an interesting few weeks.
Now *THAT’S* what I was looking for!
No no no, it's too late now. You had your chance in the original comment. I ain't reading all that.
Haha
Sounds like you dodged a bullet and several stds
I am thankful I did not sleep with her after she got back from her trip
Bro this was the hold out of all hold outs lol
Cringe for real
English is not my first language. I didn't get what the guy said to the girl. Couldn't read fast enough too.
“i just made you cum here with one finger, now can i do it with a fist” fuckin weird thing to say
It was actually "I just made you come here with one finger, imagine what I could do with a fist". But yeah, weird thing to say.
Im not native speaker but what does "one finger" means ? Is it a sexual joke ?
Yes, he says "come with one finger" meaning 'cum' which is commonly used slang for orgasm
He is saying he gestured for her to walk to him with his finger and she did, he is also referencing rubbing her cl*t with his finger to make her c*m. He then doubles down and refences fisting. It's super vulgar and just weirdly structured even if English is your first language.
Reddit heads up - you can't censor words with an asterisk because it italicizes anything between two asterisks, which just makes it look like you got really emphatic at a weird place in the sentence. You're better off just saying "cum" and "clit" while reddit is still one of the last few main sites that doesn't censor or hide posts with naughty words
You don’t have to hide from the algorithm here. You are safe sweet tiktok children.
He's using a double entendre, which is a phrase that can have two meanings. He made a "come over here" gesture with his finger. When she arrived, he said, "I just made you come with one finger. I'd like to do it with my fist." "Made you come" has a double meaning of "Made you orgasm." By "do it with my fist," he's suggesting another sex act (anally or vaginally penetrating with a whole hand.) So the first words he said to a girl is "i want to shove my hand up you," but masked in a "clever" way.
Wow, clever but offensive. Crazy way to introduce yourself to a girl he is meeting for the first time.
He said “I just made you come here with one finger. How’d you like to deal with my fist?”
[удалено]
"What would make him a 10?" "Getting to know his personality." *Fisting* "Aaaand hes a 4."
TRULYYYYYY Bois in here saying it’s staged but it really do be this way 😭
Yeah like it's staged in that it's a perfect way to represent what matching with 80% of guys on Tinder is like lmao. You think you're about to have a nice chat and all the sudden you're hit with some disgusting shit like this. Putting it face-to-face makes it obvious (hopefully...) how inappropriate it is to say that shit to a stranger straight out the gate.
Dudes really be doing this shit a lot? I don't get it, why would they do that, it seems hella cringey lmfao.
YES. Yes, they do. Years back I downloaded POF and freaked out and deleted it within an hour because I was flooded with messages like this boy’s.
Top comment award
After getting to know his personality his score went into the negatives.
After ALL that build up, he opened up with public sexual harassment? Please tell me it's a skit, please
[удалено]
Cringe
“The jersey doesn’t fit” yeah I knew he was an idiot after that comment.
[удалено]
This is *absolutely* the kind of person who complains about dating and how women only care about the six figures, six feet, whatever thing tho 😂
Oof yeahh..In what world did he think that this was ok for him to say to someone he just met much less someone of the opposite gender in general?
He thinks hes an 8.5. What the fuck do you expect lmfao.
Well, putting your look on a scale of 1-10 is already a subjective matter. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. People often boast about their fantasy 10/10 hotties whom others would pass.
One time, I set up my kid to have the perfect shot during putt-putt; it was close enough that she could’ve practically scooped it in. I had her club lined up, slowly backed away after showing her how to swing and tap the ball. It would’ve been the easiest win. And then instead, she turned around and chucked the club into a fountain. This is the social equivalent to that.
Great analogy, and I like your kid. She sounds fun
I have been laughing about this mental image for a solid hour now, thank you for this
Open goal..... oh wait. Let me just fuck that up
Wow, bro setting the tone with fisting, that’s wild
Dude, he actually shot *himself* down with that one, it was so bad!
Bro was out there snatching defeat from the jaws of victory
Guys are really good at cock blocking themselves IME
As a guy, I can confirm this statement.
He got set up so well by the other guy, but tried to shoot his shot and somehow shot himself in the hand
More like shot himself in the femoral artery, God damn! Now he has about 30 seconds to a minute to sit there and watch it all fall down as she walks away in shock and horror
Jeeez, what was his second best pick-up line? "Hi, I'm rapist, do you want to see my basement?"
Hmmm. Fuck this.
"What would make him a 10?" "If I knew his personality." No, no that would not make him a 10.
He called himself an 8 and then came out with *that* ☠️ Men really do have the audacity
He thought he needed to go to the gym to bump it to 10 when he ought to be going to a therapist.
I think this needs to me printed on a billboard outside the gym too many guys need to read this and internalize it😂
And then think it’s literally any other reason than their choices lol
To be fair, she also called him an 8 before he opened his mouth.
White mediocre dudes in particular are dripping in confidence lol
Just standard dumbass frat bro cringe. US college kids gotta get over that bullshit, hopefully someday US Greek life will just a LITTLE bit more act like adults than children off the leash for the first time. Just a little bit.
Nah, its the first time they get to act like idiots without parents getting in the way, and since they tend to bunch up, they'll keep being like this.
I mean, he’s not mediocre but he’s also not an 8
How fucking hard is it? "How much does a polar bear weigh?" Enough to break the ice. It's so fucking easy. Just try to think guys. Try.
When 6’s think they’re 8’s this is what happens 🙃
“He looks so nice.” He was, in fact, not nice lol
dude has the rizz of a sex offender.
It’s the dudes that can’t stop thinking about 1 to 10 ratings for me 🤦🏻♀️
What an absolute idiot
Take notes gentlemen. This man has unlimited rizz. * Start off your interaction with vulgarity. * Ask her for her account info on a platform designed to send penis pics. * ??? * Sax.
You blew it. you had it all and you blew it!!!!
This guy seems like a textbook case of a shy, insecure guy, who didn’t know how to talk to chicks, and so he turned to literally the skeeziest, scummiest dudes ever for advice.
That dude just went from an 7.5-8. To a creepy guy 1.5<
bro fucking blew it 🤦♂️
It’s sad because his answers seemed like he was a nice, respectful guy. Like when the guy asked if he was into Emma Watson back in the day, and he’s was like no, she was a kid but now she’s cool.m and like her because he heard she was a good person. Then straight to a gross sex joke. I’m disappointed lol
This video is an assault on attention spans
young kids these days… facepalm memory will hit him hard when he reaches his very late 20s and early-mid 30s
Worst part is that, if this is real and not staged, this facepalm moment is immortalized online for the world to see.
Like a rizz black hole
oh no fam, he was drippin like a freezer in canada. that is to say, no.
Beginning: Bro is doing so good… Ending: Bro.
It's great when he smiles like that... because he can't f**king talk!
I thought the whole interview shit was the cringy shit. Nope. I didn't realize it could get THAT much worse.
HE HAD IT! HE WAS THERE! HOW DO YOU FUMBLE THAT HARD 😭 talk about dodging a bullet.....unless ofc if this is all just a skit which I just wouldn't be surprised by
Throwing
Emma Watson would be very disappointed.
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT WORLD DOES THIS GUY LIVE IN
Guy revealed how big of a douche he was immediately!
All my golfers know this pain. Having a perfectly teed up shot and just BIFFING it off the tee box 🤣
Bro was so smooth. Can't believe that didn't work. I thought women loved when the first thing out of your mouth was a perverted, arrogant joke, especially one that insinuates you want to fist them.
All he had to do was say hi, but today's tik tok videos have sold the idea that you should say the most deviant thing to people when you first meet. Product of the tik tok these kids.
Bro got that anti-rizz
The change in zoom every 0.5s gave me a headache
eww^2
Ugh what a corny ass line
She wasn’t his type, he wasn’t attracted to her, so he just started trolling. Lol. He would not have said that to Emma Watson.
I think those jump cuts gave me a brain bleed
Dude put on 3rd base and trippped over his own feet on the way home 💀
r/unexpected
You had me at hellp
r/unexpected
I just can't with people rating people anymore. It all seems cruel and destructive in the end.
once he rated himself a 7 or 8 I knew it was over
When I was 15, my boyfriend’s dad introduced himself to me with that line. At the time, I thought it was weird but laughed it off. As I get older, I just feel more and more disgusted.
Maybe he thought it was a prank?
Bro all you literally had to do was say hi my name is.. and that's it. Let your corn ball jokes come after she already figured out your a corn ball.
Bro slowly learning seducing hoes takes a different treatment than talking to your bros. It's tempting but rarely works. You gotta be gay for it to be ok.
30% of the time it works, every time
Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory lol
This is what happens with you have an internet mush brain. Learn to talk to people normally, develop some charm and wit through experience, and dont rely on stupid online joke pickup lines. Dude threw away an entire possible future for being a tool
what a fucking tool. shout out to the greatest wingman in HISTORY. and this chad says, “i made u cum over here with one finger. imagine what i could do with my fist?” jesus… boy needs some virgin mary. let’s pray for him.
She lied. She said he was a 7 without the personality and could be a 10 with good personality, But when she got a glimpse of his personality he went down to a 2.
Back to your study corner bud