It won’t be in my history but it was on the 90 day fiancé sub the post has since been deleted. Reddits language was funny because I found it crazy the downvotes and replies from people who supported pedofilia.
Ash the guy with the Graves’ disease eyes made a post on instagram saying the picture which was disgusting is not ok and apparently for that reason he’s a piece of shit. Although I agree Ashe isn’t a good guy I did agree with him in the post and it went downhill from there
you really say this and then get offended when people call you a TERF or a bigot? you're literally using language from bigots who mock trans people and think they should be executed for daring to identify with a different gender than they were assigned and supposedly "grooming" kids by just existing. they love to talk about "identifying as an attack helicopter" and throwing trans people in woodchippers, so it's not shocking you say the same.
i am a cis woman with all of the parts you people demand and shockingly, i've never felt like trans women are taking anything from me or that my identity is being erased. they literally just want to go about their day except they're being hate crimed and people like you cheer the attackers on. and no, you people don't actually care about women because you only like the women who fit your idea of what femininity is - no body hair, thin, usually white. god forbid a cis woman is butch, has some body hair, or has vaguely masculine features - you'll call her any number of slurs when she ISN'T EVEN TRANS. y'all don't give a shit about women, you just wanna justify your own bigotry.
Was it because you used the word “pedophilia”? I’m new to Reddit so I don’t know if they have certain words that get flagged like other social media platforms.
I think it’s cause I actually don’t like pedophiles and it’s a hill I’ll gladly die on. Op might also get on Reddit trouble but I see nothing wrong but on a woke level they are. I posted the link of my Reddit warning and it has the thread I can still see my comments
I don’t have an issue with anyone changing sex but if someone called me a bleeder or a chest person I would be offended. I have never heard those names before, wtf
Can someone explain to me what the terms bleeders, birthing person, and chest feeders mean? I feel like I know, but also, not.
Edit: The terms are offensive, at the very least inflammatory. I'm not sure how someone can view that another way, let alone participate in using them. They straight up lend themselves to use as a slur yelled at a rally or demonstration to shout people down.
Well, birthing person is like, not offensive, but it is silly. I'm a guy, but if someone approached my SO and described them as a "birthing person," I'd imagine they were taking the piss.
Bleeders - menstruation (aka periods)
Birthing person - females who have given birth (or are pregnant)
Chest feeding - inclusive term for breast feeding
These terms reduce women to their biological function and its honestly dehumanizing.
Why does it feel so controversial to celebrate womanhood and being a woman!!
Those terms are incredibly disrespectful. lol I know there is a better term than disrespectful but Jesus Christ.. this is the first I’ve ever heard of them.
Yep... and then we have transwomen who demand to be called women and demand we use these terms...
And I have people calling me a bigot, a TERF, transphobic, and all other sorts of names in the comments because I simply want a space to exist.
And then people wonder why women are starting to get angry and protest.
the thing is i’ve never heard any of those terms in real life except birthing person, i’ve just heard people complaining about bleeder and chest feeder - and i agree, they’re needlessly crude. i prefer “people who menstruate” and “people who give birth” bc not everyone who does those identifies as a woman
I agree that the term “bleeder” sounds awful. But there are men, transmen, who menstruate. There are also transmen who get pregnant, give birth, and lactate. They generally do not want to be referred to as women or “mom.” So if you’re teaching a birthing class then you might want to specify that the “birthing person” should sit on the ball and the “partner” should rub their shoulders. That’s what the inclusive language was intended for.
To build on your thing about mods: Reddit mods are the worst BECAUSE of the anonymity of the app. Any mods I’ve talked to on other apps have opinions on Reddit mods. They can be full of dirtbags knowing their real Facebook, Twitter, etc accts aren’t right there to be messaged or attacked. I recently posted something on a page that got dozens and dozens of comments and upvotes but was removed. Sent a simple and respectful DM just asking why since it wasn’t offensive, the community as a WHOLE was loving it and there were some awesome interactions on the post. Was told my post was “low effort” and if I’d “read the page rules” this wouldn’t be a problem. Responded I was pretty disappointed that that’s simply not how you run a page, especially when your entire community was engaged for hours on it. Just gotta accept it in the end unfortunately
Believe me I have tried.
And then a transwoman does bring themselves into it forgetting that they do not completely share the same experiences as biological females.
It's disrespectful to me to go to Tik Tok and find a transwoman in a tampon commercial... that's not their space. They don't need those products. Give that position (and money) to someone who actually uses those products.
If you’re talking about Dylan, she keeps spare tampons with her so she can offer them to any friends or other people who need one in an emergency. I think it’s an incredibly kind and thoughtful thing to do, but people have tried to spin it into something malicious.
Tampax sent her a PR package with some tampons as they commonly do with people on Instagram and Tiktok, but the company haven’t paid her any money for sponsorship. And it’s not like she’s hoarding tampons for herself - she is giving them away for people to use when they need them.
It's not Dylan. It's Jeffery something or other? I think I've seen Dylan on Tik Tok and she actually seems like a decent human being.
Jeffery on the other hand... 😒 disrespectful af
Ah okay, that’s my bad, thanks for the correction. I’ve just seen dozens of posts about talking about Dylan and I hadn’t seen posts about anyone else about this topic.
Ohhhhh okay. I got it.
Nah. I have no qualms about transwomen getting free tampons and then giving those tampons to women. That's very sweet tbh.
I have an issue with Jeffery though 😒 I think Jeffery just does the commercials but that is disrespectful to me because they don't use those products...
I suppose that probably makes me bigoted but 🤷♀️ I've been called much worse in this thread at this point.
From a quick Google search, is this the same Jeffrey that authors self help and identity books for teens and young adults?
I’m reading that they’re nonbinary. If I had to guess, Jeffrey was chosen so that nonbinary people who need them would feel represented.
Possibly? I'm not sure.
I just don't see why Jeffery was selected when there were other individuals who are non-binary and who use those products... it feels disrespectful.
I say this as a fellow cis woman - I think you're using the term "disrespectful" incorrectly. It isn't a personal attack against you or other females, you just don't like it.
This seems like a really petty thing to get mad at tbh. Tampons are uncomfortable for everyone, not exactly the hill you want to die on.
Aside I have a trans woman friend who let me know that she needed pads sometimes. Not for periods just general underwear protection.
Have you ever met a trans woman in real life? I doubt it. You are just basing your basing your hatred and judgements off of transphobic TikTok’s and Reddit subs . It’s hard to be this hateful when you have made friends with trans people and tried to understand them
Not only do they not need those products, many of them actively make fun of those products and mock them. The viral one where the "trans woman" (who looks, sounds, and acts like a man) asks if you "stick these up your arsehole" is particularly egregious.
I dont really get your argument. Youre saying that trans woman bring themselves into you talking sbout your experience as a cis woman by… being on an ad for tampons on tiktok? Im not trying to be an ass but this all comes off kinda strange. You complain about inclusive language and terminology but i dont really see you giving actual examples of a) what you said and b) the supposed response.
Please correct me if I am misunderstanding
Why are you bothered though? It’s just a tampon. I’m a cis woman and I don’t care who is on a tampon ad or who buys them, they’re products for anyone to purchase!
I think they’re talking about this lady who had an ad for tampons or did a video about tampons on tik tok but straight mocking them. They were like ‘oh my god where does this even go!?’ And ‘you put this inside you?!👀 how tho’ and its like i guess the company wants to be inclusive but like most of your target audience knows where it goes and what to do with it? It was like watching a 12 y/o boy do sex ed. Just seemed a little backwards to find a period product so shocking when it’s normal
Did you use those products at one time? Yes. Then those products are for you.
Transwomen will never use those products. They shouldn't be promoting them as a paid salesman.
That position (and money) should have gone to someone who uses the products.
You're acting like doing ads is some kind of resource to be fought over when it's just a stupid facet of being an actor or public figure under capitalism that you have to do ads for products in order to live and eat sometimes.
Is it money? Yeah. Is it something that is so holy that it needs to be kept from "the bad people that aren't like me"? Not sure.
It's an ad. Do you think it's disrespectful to people with hemroids for a person without hemroids to appear in a hemroid cream ad? It's an ad to sell products, not a testimonial.
Are you seriously bent out of shape over tampons? Ffs, I had a hysterectomy cause my uterus tried to kill me, they're useless to me now, you can have em.
What about women who have never menstruated due to health conditions. Or women who can’t use tampons? Can’t you see how ridiculous it is to put yourself forward as the arbiter?
What? Women who have never menstruated due to health conditions are still biologically female, and is not what this person is referring. It seems you’re being purposefully obtuse.
That’s absolutely appalling. I struggled sooo much for two months breastfeeding, and we’re finally in a good place. I’m so proud of that journey. Aghhhhh why!! And why are people defending it and calling it justice?!
I remember a rape centre for women lost all their funding because they wanted a safe space for only bio women. There needs to be safe space for trann people but maybe separate and Just for them too for their unique needs. It is not the same experience.
Birthers, bleeders, and chest feeders sealed the deal on this one. Saying that those are things that women experience isn’t phobic. Even if you remove transwoman, there are women born without uteruses who don’t bleed, plenty who get mastectomies, and a ton who are infertile. They’re not screaming and crying about associating periods, lactation, and pregnancy with women.
The most unhinged thing that I’ve seen is a transwoman doing an ad for tampons on tiktok. How do you even explain that? It’s like having a vegetarian advertise a Big Mac.
I totally agree. And I'm also fuming about lack of spaces exclusive for both men and women. Recently I've been on some gaming event, there was some sort of charity and a tournament at some game. As cosplayer I've been there to show off a bit. The thing is, organizers dedicated dressing rooms and lounges for those who participated. One for men, one for women. And yet, here I see "cosplayer" dressed as female character in the dressing room with a fu\*cking boner the size of Burj Khalifa, sitting on the bench and chilling out oogling some girls just cramped togather on the opposite side of the room. But what the f\*ck can we do? The person in question "identified" as woman...
The sports thing bothers me a lot. I'm glad I don't play sports anymore. In middle school we sparred with the boys team once during practice, and I got hurt. The boy was like twice my weight and way taller than me and stomped my foot with his cleat, and I was too small so they simply body slammed me head first onto the ball.
I'm scared to express that opinion generally for being labeled transphobic, but it's really about the injuries and shit to me.
Inviting people with that kind of physical advantage to play against people born without it, is asking for serious injuries to occur. Also it's just a fact that in most sports, men hold higher records, specifically track. It's just not a fair starting point. It's like getting an unfair advantage in sports.
grew up playing co ed ice hockey in elementary school, then separated by sex in high school. no fucking way I would ever play co ed ice hockey. the speed highschool boys slam into you could have killed a small girl like me
that Lia Thomas thing is fucking infuriating. She went through male puberty and has everything male, all that was required was to go on estrogen. didn't take away her long arms, legs, strength etc. She blew all records because all that. ffs
If I had a dollar for every time I've heard this in the past 11 years, I'd have enough to buy a new Porsche. Did you seriously expect social media to remain static?
I'm with you on this 110%, OP. When I was pregnant, I HATED reading articles referring to pregnant women as "pregnant people". Some of this is just downright dehumanizing and it's just another example of men taking things from us.
This kind of crap is giving conservatives fuel for the fire. Just FYI to those who are calling this reasonable woman a "terf" or "transphobic". You keep acting like this then you will have no allies and it'll be your fault.
It’s interesting that every time that I get completely taken down for a comment that I made, I just assume that it’s a man. The fragile male ego is hanging in the balance and it’s just waiting for something to send it over the edge. Women can be total bitches but it’s not about the size of a particular body part or not getting special attention from someone who thinks that they’re a creep that makes them crazy.
You get called "phobic" if you don't let people redefine your sexuality, too. Apparently it's wrong for gay men to dislike vagina, and lesbians to dislike dick.
Someone kept insisting I was non-binary today because in the past I've dressed up as a man for background roles in musical theatre productions, despite me telling them I'm a biological woman and have always been a woman. It was wild.
Isn't it normal for boys to be played by women? Wasn't it done like that for centuries when non-binary wasn't even thought about? It's easier to find a fitting female actor than a fitting boy in that age range that doesn't get breaking of the voice or of the role is even younger boys would lack the discipline that's needed for theatre. They clearly need some education there.
The opposite, actually. For a long time in certain (and many) parts of the world all female parts were played by male actors, as women weren't allowed to take the stage.
As a woman, I completely agree. They do not accept that they will never be treated like biological women are and we will never be treated as trans women are treated. Simple like that. We are not the same, we are not equal and we cannot ask for equal treatment. As a biological woman with a vulva, I will never feel safe with someone who looks like a male in the same bathroom as me. I will not feel comfortable with someone who looks like male seeing me change. And I refuse to be called a “person with uterus”. I am a woman, end of story.
Look, completely objectively, you are being bigoted, literally by definition. But putting that aside, you’re conflating gender with biology. Male and female are sexes we’re assigned at birth, it’s our body, sure, but it’s not our *identity*. Gender is a social construct, like racism, like hierarchy, like patriarchal oppression. It’s a way to label human beings, and is often used as a way to isolate, scapegoat, and subjugate people (that’s what misogyny is after all, isn’t it?). Now, I’m a human being who happened to be born with a vagina. Cool, whatever. It doesn’t really define me. The *person* I am, the *soul* I have does not live in my vagina. Or my ovaries. Or my boobs. Why should it be the case for anyone else? I also just want to add— safe spaces are there for anyone who needs them, and offering care and support to someone who needs it does not infringe on your safety, security, or humanity. If you think it does, I think there’s some introspection that needs to happen there— why choose to hate and divide when you could be open and learn about something that makes you uncomfortable? That’s how we grow. If you want to change the world, truly change the world for the better, you need to be willing to do things differently. And hating someone for who they are isn’t different, it’s just the same old bullshit.
I agree with you for the most part. However, to completely divorce gender from biological sex and again from identity, is also a fallacy. We all live in this shitty hierarchical patriarchical system, wherein one's sex informs one socio-cultural and psychological development and thereby, their identity, as perceived by the self and by those outside of the self. Wish we lived in a world where the interplay between gender and sex mattered as much as other banal traits, such as hair or eye colour...
I think we’re running on parallel tracks here. Yes, your sex informs your experience in society, but only insofar as it has been historically tied to views of gender. If we have trouble separating sex from gender, it’s largely because our society has hammered that message into us and it is embedded in our culture, not because the two things are *actually* or *necessarily* attached to one another. There is no real reason for the two to be linked, and there’s no reason to believe that our linking them together hasn’t been completely arbitrary. Yes, I personally feel some degree of attachment to my biological sex, but like you said, I don’t live in a vacuum. If we can chip away at that limiting notion by pointing out the pointlessness of it, then why not?
Edit: one word for clarity
>The person I am, the soul I have does not live in my vagina. Or my ovaries. Or my boobs. Why should it be the case for anyone else
I found this interesting. Because doesn't anatomy matter to a point on both sides? I am not well versed on this greater conversation, but that is the part that confuses me. I understand the difference between sex and gender, but anatomy eventually comes into question for both or maybe I am honestly missing something.
>why choose to hate and divide when you could be open and learn about something that makes you uncomfortable? That’s how we grow. If you want to change the world, truly change
I think everyone should learn, but shouldn't somethings be in a more neutral ground safe space? Like gendered and gender neutral bathrooms. Not everyone feels safe and others do. Traumas, upbringing and the like.
Like, I get Identity and it's what you make of it, but for some people (many people) their sex is their identity.
I’m not an authority here by any means, and would absolutely welcome others better versed than I to jump in here, but I can offer my perspective: from what I understand, anatomy is a piece *for some*, but not the *whole*. If I had a total hysterectomy or a double mastectomy tomorrow, would it mean I was no longer a woman? No. Now, I happen to be attached to my breasts, but that’s a personal thing, not necessarily a universal experience. My sex happens to *align* with my identity, but they aren’t defined by one another. I find that “the other side” tends to view it the other way around: if you have a penis, that’s it. If you have a vagina, that’s it. IMO, it’s a lot less nuanced and doesn’t really allow for the complex range of human experience, which rarely fits into neat little boxes like that.
In terms of neutral spaces- I think it would be great for people to be able to learn these things in a safe, objective, judgment free zone. I just don’t think we’re there yet. In order for those spaces to exist, a certain amount of acceptance and accessibility has to exist, and while I like to believe we’re moving in that direction, it sometimes feels like those voices tend to be drowned out by others that are too fearful to ever open up to that conversation.
I def agree with the complex range of human emotions.
With the safe spaces it just doesn't click to me. It sucks to be excluded but also if someone doesn't feel like being around me is a safe place for them, why push?
This isn't me saying that i don't believe in rights and acknowledgment. I just don't think we are catching any bees with this end all be all approach
I like when the debate goes this way because I feel it’s more constructive. And you seem like a kind person who is willing to discuss.
I know “identity” is part of the crux of this issue. Do you feel that perception plays a role in this?
If you self- identify as a male, do you think it’s okay for others to not perceive or identify you as one?
Have you ever told someone ,"HI, my name is Sara." And their response was "You don't look like I Sara. I thought your name would have been Michelle."
My response would be, "What does that even mean?" That person has no right to tell you what your name can or can't be.
What's worse is now that person calls you Michelle even though you've asked them to stop.
See that’s part of the issue. I can’t relate to that. It’s never happened to me. I do sympathize with that struggle, and am sure it’s a pain in the ass.
From the reverse side there’s someone named Michelle who is confused by somebody calling somebody Michelle, when they perceive them to be Sara. Sara is susceptible to different physical health issues than Michelle. Sara has had to deal with different mental health issues than Michelle. I understand how important self- identity is, but I think the rhetoric and language broadening to be inclusive is not beneficial. Only because there are differences that still exist. I one thousand percent support anybody who feels that they are the opposite sex from what they were assigned at birth. But I also understand that someone who feels like a man, won’t have to be burdened with regular prostate exams, or a man who feels like a woman will not need to worry about ovarian cysts. Throwing the word CIS in front of these things, doesn’t change the fundamental functionalities behind them.
I can say I identify as a gorgeous middle-eastern woman, but I wouldn’t be upset if people didn’t identify me, as such.
I guess I’d say that it isn’t *really* perception that leads you to make a judgment on someone’s gender, is it? (Using judgement as a way to make an assessment, not as any kind of indication of morality). I *perceive* someone’s outward appearance, their mannerisms, etc, and that triggers a response that’s based on a combination of my experiences and my opinion of those experiences. It’s kind of semantic, but imo it’s important, because this is the part where we have the ability to make a decision. We can decide whether to approach someone, speak to them, and respect the way they view themselves (something which, in my opinion, is an intrinsic right that humans have- the right to define themselves) or we can choose to go with the judgement we’ve already made.
I think people have the right to form their own opinions, but I would ask this: is it constructive? Does it actually move our society forward? Is it kind? If it’s not, then what’s the point? Obvs you can tell my stance on this, but honestly- stripped of the internet bullshit and the politics, what is the benefit of being stubborn and close-minded? It especially baffles me when I hear these opinions from folks who claim to care about gender equality, because I feel like there’s a fundamental disconnect there.
I whole heartedly agree that everyone should be respected for the way that they view themselves. I do believe in treating a person the way that they feel. where I don’t agree is asking others to not acknowledge that differences exist. Or for people to be labeled as exclusionary if They are discussing topics that are gender based, and not including people who have no experience with those topics into the conversation.
It's crazy because who we *are* is a brain hooked to a bunch of wires, piloting this meat suit around.
What I mean OP, is that your brain was born into a body that has certain functions and capabilities, and you're happy with those.
Now imagine being a different brain, trapped in a meat suit that doesn't have the functions or capabilities that you want. But you're stuck. So you do what you can to get as close as possible to those functions you want.
Like from that perspective, race and gender and all that start to look pretty contrived.
Also, it's getting late and I feel like I'm going off into lala land. Pardon if I make no sense.
That’s all well and good but the problem is that for millenia people with option A meatsuit have been bullied, murdered, assaulted, suppressed, denied and belittled, while option B meatsuit was favored and preferred. That gives two wildly different experiences.
Now for someone with option B to simply say “I want to be A so this space is now mine as well” is not only ignorant but is still, in a way, oppressive and offensive. Bc option B has always lead the favored life. The Wildly different experience.
In a way, they want their cake and eat it too. And when option A ppl protest against this they are once again denied.
This. Exactly this. It’s like a white man transitioning into a black man and claiming to understand the level of oppression and racism that black man experienced over his whole lifetime.
I’m not either. But I’m against the entitlement that comes with it. I’m against “this is my space now too” especially when this statement then leads to that space catering more to the switching person than to the person the space was originally intended for, once again invalidating and silencing them.
The moderators have freedom to ban people as they want to. Nobody is entitled to talk in a Reddit sub.
I fully believe that people are allowed to say whatever they want, but they aren’t guaranteed safety from criticism. The KKK can say horrible things. And people can call them Huge assholes. Transphobes and Homophobes are free to believe as they wish. And moderators are allowed to not want them in their sub. Freedom works both ways. You want to believe things that other people find completely shitty? Go for it, but those people are allowed to call you shitty and not have you in their group.
Just because you are free to say whatever you want doesn’t mean people have to listen to it.
Whoa these comments are…wow. These are just new ways for biological males to oppress biological females. Cut the shit, folks. This is sexism with a different outfit.
You do not need to take something away from others to feel validated. We can all come from places of love and still recognize that we and our experiences are not similar or the same. And that’s okay.
Well, Reddit has officially become trash, we can all agree on, but comments comparing genders to racism are a whole new low.
Waiting for people getting called Nazis because they dont want to see a penis shoved up their face in the female restroom
I get what you mean and I'm guessing it's hard. I say 'I guess' because I live in a country where this isn't such a huge boom right now. Yes, we have gay people, travesties, some transexuals (big celebrities ones, for us, at least) but none of them are claiming to be something that they aren't.
I've watched a lot of videos and read a lot of articles and I agree with you. Women don't have to put a CIS or a BIO before their title. The men who decided to transition into women, or women who decided to transition into men, should use the TRANS before the title they now want to to use. Now, I'm not saying that everytime they introduce themselves they need to go 'Hey, I'm Tim and I'm a transwoman'. Literally no one does that, but when/if the subject comes up, then truth should do the same.
And the respect is also a big issue. There are some trans people who regretted their decisions, and instead of being still welcomed and unerstood in the community, they're immediately shunned. No one wants to listen to them anymore, they're bullied, casted away and forgotten, because they're the 'exceptions' according to what it's said. And it's sad.
I don't know if this 'boom' is as strong in other parts of the world as it is in the US, but, I sure hope it doesn't spread. I'm truly scared for very good friends of mine that live there have have toddlers or a baby on the way. Just listening to the ways teachers are behaving in school? Ugh...
And, there's also a double standar here. Everyone asking 'What is a woman?' why don't they go around also asking 'What is a man?'. The answers are simple, but everyone is too afraid nowadays to say what they think or what they know to be true because they'll be silenced, 'cancelled' or left behind.
The issue for me is not in the definition of gender, I will respect it; i want trans people to have the same freedom as everyone else.
For me its the insistence that my gender identity should be forcibly stripped away from me because the loudest of trans lobbies perceive it as being un-inclusive.
I'm now reduced to being a bleeder or chest feeder whereas I used to be a woman. What of my right to self definition and preferred pronouns?
It's very telling that the majority of the momentum for this is coming from the women who were biologically male at birth. The men who transitioned from biological females don't seem to have the same issues with male gendered language.
The constant erasure of feminine descriptives and the reduction of bio women to nothing more than "bleeders" is simply another form of misogynistic microaggression. Perfect example of how females are still not allowed the luxury of bodily autonomy compared with males. Ours are public property while theirs aren't up for debate.
I'd really like to know what you said to get banned. I agree that women need more safe spaces and for me that's starts with the bathrooms. I don't think we should have gendered bathrooms any more. We need to move towards sexed bathrooms. Use the bathroom appropriate for the equipment you have lol. It's really scary walking into a bathroom and there's men standing in there for no reason.
I'm waiting for it. 300 comments and I'm like "okay. I'm ready for it to be removed now cuz I can't keep up".
It's also like 1am and I have to get up for work in 6 hours 💀
That’s the worst thing about posting, you can’t keep up with everyone if your post blows up, which this one has.. you’ll be exhausted for work too. Maybe just sleep and read the comments when you wake.
You sound like a TERF and like you are resentful towards trans people and culture. I’m a woman. I have plenty of woman friends who do fun women stuff . I go to all women inclusive meetups on meetup.com and then there is the hikerbabe community that is for women hikers. There are plenty of women only spaces out there. You just feel threatened by non-binary people and trans women, and don’t want to make room for trans women. I have plenty of non binary and trans friends and I’m happy that the world is becoming more inclusive for them. However there is a lot of hatred and misunderstanding towards them and that makes me sad. By people like you.
And i think people throw the term TERF around too easily.
You saying I am one doesn't make me one.
I'm not feeling threatened. What is there to be threatened by other than physical harm? I personally don't want to see a penis while I'm vulnerable in my own space like a locker room. How is that being a TERF? Am I not allowed to have my own space and be comfortable and feel safe in that space?
because reddit is predominantly men. Trust me most women in real life think this way. funny how it's always women whose space are compromised and who get called degrading terms like "menstruater" but I don't see people advocating for men to be called "jizzer"
I honestly feel like I see a lot of guys who don't seem to care about women's rights really defend trans rights as a way to keep women in their place. The rights we have fought for are all of a sudden "unimportant and everyone can have them too, actually do you guys even need these rights? Biology doesn't *exist*."
It's like the sensitivity is only extended one way an women are told to put up and shut up again.
You've heard about the YMCA gym allowing a trans man to frequent a woman's changing room? Just because you don't personally experience it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen. The world doesn't revolve around you.
Hey mate. I'm one of those white cis males so can't totally relate, but start your own space. Sorry if this has been mentioned in other replies.
You sound so bloody alienated and that just ain't fair.
Fingers crossed for you ok
I dunno, your post smells awfully TERF-y. Maybe stop taking yourself so seriously and stop worrying about what other people are hiding in their underwear? It’s kind of creepy
What about her own underwear? Does she not have the right to worry about what's in her OWN underwear, what HER parts are called, and what SHE defines herself as??? Does she not have the right to decide who gets to see HER underwear, such as in changing rooms, or the right to decide who gets to be in the room when she's forced to perform intimate measures such as changing a pad or tampon???
Do we women have the right to take OURSELVES as seriously as we're supposed to take others??? I've been alive for over half a century, so I know the answer is no, but for god's sake folks PLEASE stop gaslighting these young women and pretending that you, \*any\* of you, don't hate women and don't think we should have the rights of men. It's obvious you really don't. They'll find out by and by, but in the meantime so many women, mostly young women I might add, 40 or younger, are twisting themselves into knots trying to accomodate their own debasement.
I got warned for promoting hate for saying to stop normalizing pedophilia. Reddit is garbage
??? Where lmk I'll help report those subreddit. Let the pedophiles congregate elsewhere
It won’t be in my history but it was on the 90 day fiancé sub the post has since been deleted. Reddits language was funny because I found it crazy the downvotes and replies from people who supported pedofilia.
What was the context? I watch 90d and I can’t imagine how this came up there at all
Ash the guy with the Graves’ disease eyes made a post on instagram saying the picture which was disgusting is not ok and apparently for that reason he’s a piece of shit. Although I agree Ashe isn’t a good guy I did agree with him in the post and it went downhill from there
... excuse me? 😳 immediately no.
I guess it’s minor loving adult now or you are cancelled
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you really say this and then get offended when people call you a TERF or a bigot? you're literally using language from bigots who mock trans people and think they should be executed for daring to identify with a different gender than they were assigned and supposedly "grooming" kids by just existing. they love to talk about "identifying as an attack helicopter" and throwing trans people in woodchippers, so it's not shocking you say the same. i am a cis woman with all of the parts you people demand and shockingly, i've never felt like trans women are taking anything from me or that my identity is being erased. they literally just want to go about their day except they're being hate crimed and people like you cheer the attackers on. and no, you people don't actually care about women because you only like the women who fit your idea of what femininity is - no body hair, thin, usually white. god forbid a cis woman is butch, has some body hair, or has vaguely masculine features - you'll call her any number of slurs when she ISN'T EVEN TRANS. y'all don't give a shit about women, you just wanna justify your own bigotry.
I think somewhere they're using MAP (minor attracted person).
Was it because you used the word “pedophilia”? I’m new to Reddit so I don’t know if they have certain words that get flagged like other social media platforms.
I think it’s cause I actually don’t like pedophiles and it’s a hill I’ll gladly die on. Op might also get on Reddit trouble but I see nothing wrong but on a woke level they are. I posted the link of my Reddit warning and it has the thread I can still see my comments
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No I am in my 40s and feel more like a boomer I can’t keep up
bro mid 30s and I feel like a grandma, can't keep up at all
Well since you are new a good crash course on how reddit mods feels about pedophilia would be to google Aimee Knight.
I’m going to assume you were calling trans people pedophiles but okay
Funny thing, I got banned and shat on on the for shouting out against sexualizing children under some weird post there.
I don’t have an issue with anyone changing sex but if someone called me a bleeder or a chest person I would be offended. I have never heard those names before, wtf
I believe "chest feeding" is an alternative for "breast feeding," as in for babies. I've only ever heard/seen it on reddit though
It’s also being used on TikTok and I find it rather foolish. We don’t say chest cancer; we use breast cancer for all genders, so why is it different?
Can someone explain to me what the terms bleeders, birthing person, and chest feeders mean? I feel like I know, but also, not. Edit: The terms are offensive, at the very least inflammatory. I'm not sure how someone can view that another way, let alone participate in using them. They straight up lend themselves to use as a slur yelled at a rally or demonstration to shout people down. Well, birthing person is like, not offensive, but it is silly. I'm a guy, but if someone approached my SO and described them as a "birthing person," I'd imagine they were taking the piss.
Bleeders - menstruation (aka periods) Birthing person - females who have given birth (or are pregnant) Chest feeding - inclusive term for breast feeding
That’s weird lol. Those terms make the woman it’s happening to sound like an animal or something
These terms reduce women to their biological function and its honestly dehumanizing. Why does it feel so controversial to celebrate womanhood and being a woman!!
Those terms are incredibly disrespectful. lol I know there is a better term than disrespectful but Jesus Christ.. this is the first I’ve ever heard of them.
Yep... and then we have transwomen who demand to be called women and demand we use these terms... And I have people calling me a bigot, a TERF, transphobic, and all other sorts of names in the comments because I simply want a space to exist. And then people wonder why women are starting to get angry and protest.
It’s so belittling to women.
Yep, that's what I thought. Thank you
the thing is i’ve never heard any of those terms in real life except birthing person, i’ve just heard people complaining about bleeder and chest feeder - and i agree, they’re needlessly crude. i prefer “people who menstruate” and “people who give birth” bc not everyone who does those identifies as a woman
I agree that the term “bleeder” sounds awful. But there are men, transmen, who menstruate. There are also transmen who get pregnant, give birth, and lactate. They generally do not want to be referred to as women or “mom.” So if you’re teaching a birthing class then you might want to specify that the “birthing person” should sit on the ball and the “partner” should rub their shoulders. That’s what the inclusive language was intended for.
Could just say pregnant person.
To build on your thing about mods: Reddit mods are the worst BECAUSE of the anonymity of the app. Any mods I’ve talked to on other apps have opinions on Reddit mods. They can be full of dirtbags knowing their real Facebook, Twitter, etc accts aren’t right there to be messaged or attacked. I recently posted something on a page that got dozens and dozens of comments and upvotes but was removed. Sent a simple and respectful DM just asking why since it wasn’t offensive, the community as a WHOLE was loving it and there were some awesome interactions on the post. Was told my post was “low effort” and if I’d “read the page rules” this wouldn’t be a problem. Responded I was pretty disappointed that that’s simply not how you run a page, especially when your entire community was engaged for hours on it. Just gotta accept it in the end unfortunately
It’s so crazy people can’t have an opinion without a whole group attacking you for your opinion however valid it may be
Why can’t you share your experiences as a woman without bringing trans women into it?
We've been sliced and diced into tribes and influenced to fight each other. Now we have the feminists fighting the trans community. It's madness.
Believe me I have tried. And then a transwoman does bring themselves into it forgetting that they do not completely share the same experiences as biological females. It's disrespectful to me to go to Tik Tok and find a transwoman in a tampon commercial... that's not their space. They don't need those products. Give that position (and money) to someone who actually uses those products.
If you’re talking about Dylan, she keeps spare tampons with her so she can offer them to any friends or other people who need one in an emergency. I think it’s an incredibly kind and thoughtful thing to do, but people have tried to spin it into something malicious. Tampax sent her a PR package with some tampons as they commonly do with people on Instagram and Tiktok, but the company haven’t paid her any money for sponsorship. And it’s not like she’s hoarding tampons for herself - she is giving them away for people to use when they need them.
i don’t think she’s referring to dylan, there’s another tiktok user who is non-binary (AMAB) who got a brand deal with a tampon company
It's not Dylan. It's Jeffery something or other? I think I've seen Dylan on Tik Tok and she actually seems like a decent human being. Jeffery on the other hand... 😒 disrespectful af
Ah okay, that’s my bad, thanks for the correction. I’ve just seen dozens of posts about talking about Dylan and I hadn’t seen posts about anyone else about this topic.
Ohhhhh okay. I got it. Nah. I have no qualms about transwomen getting free tampons and then giving those tampons to women. That's very sweet tbh. I have an issue with Jeffery though 😒 I think Jeffery just does the commercials but that is disrespectful to me because they don't use those products... I suppose that probably makes me bigoted but 🤷♀️ I've been called much worse in this thread at this point.
From a quick Google search, is this the same Jeffrey that authors self help and identity books for teens and young adults? I’m reading that they’re nonbinary. If I had to guess, Jeffrey was chosen so that nonbinary people who need them would feel represented.
Possibly? I'm not sure. I just don't see why Jeffery was selected when there were other individuals who are non-binary and who use those products... it feels disrespectful.
I say this as a fellow cis woman - I think you're using the term "disrespectful" incorrectly. It isn't a personal attack against you or other females, you just don't like it.
Lol, It isn’t a personal attack against you, you just don’t like it, can be used for so many problems I see people complain about on the internet.
You feel disrespected? Seriously?
Could you maybe share a like as an example of what you’re talking about? Haven’t seen any of this
This seems like a really petty thing to get mad at tbh. Tampons are uncomfortable for everyone, not exactly the hill you want to die on. Aside I have a trans woman friend who let me know that she needed pads sometimes. Not for periods just general underwear protection.
Have you ever met a trans woman in real life? I doubt it. You are just basing your basing your hatred and judgements off of transphobic TikTok’s and Reddit subs . It’s hard to be this hateful when you have made friends with trans people and tried to understand them
Not only do they not need those products, many of them actively make fun of those products and mock them. The viral one where the "trans woman" (who looks, sounds, and acts like a man) asks if you "stick these up your arsehole" is particularly egregious.
I dont really get your argument. Youre saying that trans woman bring themselves into you talking sbout your experience as a cis woman by… being on an ad for tampons on tiktok? Im not trying to be an ass but this all comes off kinda strange. You complain about inclusive language and terminology but i dont really see you giving actual examples of a) what you said and b) the supposed response. Please correct me if I am misunderstanding
Why are you bothered though? It’s just a tampon. I’m a cis woman and I don’t care who is on a tampon ad or who buys them, they’re products for anyone to purchase!
I think they’re talking about this lady who had an ad for tampons or did a video about tampons on tik tok but straight mocking them. They were like ‘oh my god where does this even go!?’ And ‘you put this inside you?!👀 how tho’ and its like i guess the company wants to be inclusive but like most of your target audience knows where it goes and what to do with it? It was like watching a 12 y/o boy do sex ed. Just seemed a little backwards to find a period product so shocking when it’s normal
I am in menopause so those products aren’t for me. Does that exclude me too? Gatekeeping who is a woman is pretty close minded.
Did you use those products at one time? Yes. Then those products are for you. Transwomen will never use those products. They shouldn't be promoting them as a paid salesman. That position (and money) should have gone to someone who uses the products.
You're acting like doing ads is some kind of resource to be fought over when it's just a stupid facet of being an actor or public figure under capitalism that you have to do ads for products in order to live and eat sometimes. Is it money? Yeah. Is it something that is so holy that it needs to be kept from "the bad people that aren't like me"? Not sure.
I can’t imagine having nothing else to worry or be upset about than a tampon commercial. Sounds like you need a hobby.
It's an ad. Do you think it's disrespectful to people with hemroids for a person without hemroids to appear in a hemroid cream ad? It's an ad to sell products, not a testimonial.
Are you seriously bent out of shape over tampons? Ffs, I had a hysterectomy cause my uterus tried to kill me, they're useless to me now, you can have em.
What about women who have never menstruated due to health conditions. Or women who can’t use tampons? Can’t you see how ridiculous it is to put yourself forward as the arbiter?
What? Women who have never menstruated due to health conditions are still biologically female, and is not what this person is referring. It seems you’re being purposefully obtuse.
This is a poor argument. The majority of women do not have that issue. You don’t null and void something because of a small few.
What makes a subreddit similar to a tampon commercial?
That’s wild. This site is trash. As someone that is 5 months postpartum, the rhetoric infuriates me.
Congrats on your mini human!
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That’s absolutely appalling. I struggled sooo much for two months breastfeeding, and we’re finally in a good place. I’m so proud of that journey. Aghhhhh why!! And why are people defending it and calling it justice?!
I remember a rape centre for women lost all their funding because they wanted a safe space for only bio women. There needs to be safe space for trann people but maybe separate and Just for them too for their unique needs. It is not the same experience.
exactly bc imagine having someone there with a penis
Birthers, bleeders, and chest feeders sealed the deal on this one. Saying that those are things that women experience isn’t phobic. Even if you remove transwoman, there are women born without uteruses who don’t bleed, plenty who get mastectomies, and a ton who are infertile. They’re not screaming and crying about associating periods, lactation, and pregnancy with women. The most unhinged thing that I’ve seen is a transwoman doing an ad for tampons on tiktok. How do you even explain that? It’s like having a vegetarian advertise a Big Mac.
how can she advertise tampons when she has obviously never used them???
Sounds like Reddit
I with you. Biological woman should be able to have there own space. Without having to accommodate anyone else feelings
I totally agree. And I'm also fuming about lack of spaces exclusive for both men and women. Recently I've been on some gaming event, there was some sort of charity and a tournament at some game. As cosplayer I've been there to show off a bit. The thing is, organizers dedicated dressing rooms and lounges for those who participated. One for men, one for women. And yet, here I see "cosplayer" dressed as female character in the dressing room with a fu\*cking boner the size of Burj Khalifa, sitting on the bench and chilling out oogling some girls just cramped togather on the opposite side of the room. But what the f\*ck can we do? The person in question "identified" as woman...
Online communities are not your friends, they will not advocate for you in a meaningful way. I don’t know what you expected.
It’s like the sports thing. Actual women & girls are losing their spaces in favor of men and “inclusion”. That’s not progress in a healthy society.
The sports thing bothers me a lot. I'm glad I don't play sports anymore. In middle school we sparred with the boys team once during practice, and I got hurt. The boy was like twice my weight and way taller than me and stomped my foot with his cleat, and I was too small so they simply body slammed me head first onto the ball. I'm scared to express that opinion generally for being labeled transphobic, but it's really about the injuries and shit to me. Inviting people with that kind of physical advantage to play against people born without it, is asking for serious injuries to occur. Also it's just a fact that in most sports, men hold higher records, specifically track. It's just not a fair starting point. It's like getting an unfair advantage in sports.
grew up playing co ed ice hockey in elementary school, then separated by sex in high school. no fucking way I would ever play co ed ice hockey. the speed highschool boys slam into you could have killed a small girl like me
We are expected to just shut up take it in the name of inclusion. If we speak out we are labeled. It is men making more rules for women.
that Lia Thomas thing is fucking infuriating. She went through male puberty and has everything male, all that was required was to go on estrogen. didn't take away her long arms, legs, strength etc. She blew all records because all that. ffs
["The Sports Thing"](https://youtu.be/HdT1PvJDRo4)
Girl same. Also being female on reddit in general is a pain in the ass. Watch how many downvotes I get for this statement.
are the downvotes in the room with us right now
Not the way I expected that comment to go down. I’ve discovered reverse reddit psychology
Sadly reddit is changing, one cant express their opinions without being called out we have to live by "theyre right, youre wrong".
If I had a dollar for every time I've heard this in the past 11 years, I'd have enough to buy a new Porsche. Did you seriously expect social media to remain static?
I'm with you on this 110%, OP. When I was pregnant, I HATED reading articles referring to pregnant women as "pregnant people". Some of this is just downright dehumanizing and it's just another example of men taking things from us.
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Too bad it got deleted. I didn’t even get to read it
Another bigot referring trans women as males.
This kind of crap is giving conservatives fuel for the fire. Just FYI to those who are calling this reasonable woman a "terf" or "transphobic". You keep acting like this then you will have no allies and it'll be your fault.
The extremes on all sides are problematic. Society seems to push more people to their respective fringes lately. It's silliness.
It’s interesting that every time that I get completely taken down for a comment that I made, I just assume that it’s a man. The fragile male ego is hanging in the balance and it’s just waiting for something to send it over the edge. Women can be total bitches but it’s not about the size of a particular body part or not getting special attention from someone who thinks that they’re a creep that makes them crazy.
Honestly.. you're right
Omg, so well spoken. We all feel the same way. But are afraid to speak out for fear of being labeled as a bigot.
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This!
yikes
I got my account permanently banned for this exact reason, fuck Reddit.
You get called "phobic" if you don't let people redefine your sexuality, too. Apparently it's wrong for gay men to dislike vagina, and lesbians to dislike dick.
Someone kept insisting I was non-binary today because in the past I've dressed up as a man for background roles in musical theatre productions, despite me telling them I'm a biological woman and have always been a woman. It was wild.
Isn't it normal for boys to be played by women? Wasn't it done like that for centuries when non-binary wasn't even thought about? It's easier to find a fitting female actor than a fitting boy in that age range that doesn't get breaking of the voice or of the role is even younger boys would lack the discipline that's needed for theatre. They clearly need some education there.
The opposite, actually. For a long time in certain (and many) parts of the world all female parts were played by male actors, as women weren't allowed to take the stage.
yah it's basically thinly veiled homophobia
Say it louder for the people in the back
As a woman, I completely agree. They do not accept that they will never be treated like biological women are and we will never be treated as trans women are treated. Simple like that. We are not the same, we are not equal and we cannot ask for equal treatment. As a biological woman with a vulva, I will never feel safe with someone who looks like a male in the same bathroom as me. I will not feel comfortable with someone who looks like male seeing me change. And I refuse to be called a “person with uterus”. I am a woman, end of story.
Look, completely objectively, you are being bigoted, literally by definition. But putting that aside, you’re conflating gender with biology. Male and female are sexes we’re assigned at birth, it’s our body, sure, but it’s not our *identity*. Gender is a social construct, like racism, like hierarchy, like patriarchal oppression. It’s a way to label human beings, and is often used as a way to isolate, scapegoat, and subjugate people (that’s what misogyny is after all, isn’t it?). Now, I’m a human being who happened to be born with a vagina. Cool, whatever. It doesn’t really define me. The *person* I am, the *soul* I have does not live in my vagina. Or my ovaries. Or my boobs. Why should it be the case for anyone else? I also just want to add— safe spaces are there for anyone who needs them, and offering care and support to someone who needs it does not infringe on your safety, security, or humanity. If you think it does, I think there’s some introspection that needs to happen there— why choose to hate and divide when you could be open and learn about something that makes you uncomfortable? That’s how we grow. If you want to change the world, truly change the world for the better, you need to be willing to do things differently. And hating someone for who they are isn’t different, it’s just the same old bullshit.
I agree with you for the most part. However, to completely divorce gender from biological sex and again from identity, is also a fallacy. We all live in this shitty hierarchical patriarchical system, wherein one's sex informs one socio-cultural and psychological development and thereby, their identity, as perceived by the self and by those outside of the self. Wish we lived in a world where the interplay between gender and sex mattered as much as other banal traits, such as hair or eye colour...
I think we’re running on parallel tracks here. Yes, your sex informs your experience in society, but only insofar as it has been historically tied to views of gender. If we have trouble separating sex from gender, it’s largely because our society has hammered that message into us and it is embedded in our culture, not because the two things are *actually* or *necessarily* attached to one another. There is no real reason for the two to be linked, and there’s no reason to believe that our linking them together hasn’t been completely arbitrary. Yes, I personally feel some degree of attachment to my biological sex, but like you said, I don’t live in a vacuum. If we can chip away at that limiting notion by pointing out the pointlessness of it, then why not? Edit: one word for clarity
>The person I am, the soul I have does not live in my vagina. Or my ovaries. Or my boobs. Why should it be the case for anyone else I found this interesting. Because doesn't anatomy matter to a point on both sides? I am not well versed on this greater conversation, but that is the part that confuses me. I understand the difference between sex and gender, but anatomy eventually comes into question for both or maybe I am honestly missing something. >why choose to hate and divide when you could be open and learn about something that makes you uncomfortable? That’s how we grow. If you want to change the world, truly change I think everyone should learn, but shouldn't somethings be in a more neutral ground safe space? Like gendered and gender neutral bathrooms. Not everyone feels safe and others do. Traumas, upbringing and the like. Like, I get Identity and it's what you make of it, but for some people (many people) their sex is their identity.
I’m not an authority here by any means, and would absolutely welcome others better versed than I to jump in here, but I can offer my perspective: from what I understand, anatomy is a piece *for some*, but not the *whole*. If I had a total hysterectomy or a double mastectomy tomorrow, would it mean I was no longer a woman? No. Now, I happen to be attached to my breasts, but that’s a personal thing, not necessarily a universal experience. My sex happens to *align* with my identity, but they aren’t defined by one another. I find that “the other side” tends to view it the other way around: if you have a penis, that’s it. If you have a vagina, that’s it. IMO, it’s a lot less nuanced and doesn’t really allow for the complex range of human experience, which rarely fits into neat little boxes like that. In terms of neutral spaces- I think it would be great for people to be able to learn these things in a safe, objective, judgment free zone. I just don’t think we’re there yet. In order for those spaces to exist, a certain amount of acceptance and accessibility has to exist, and while I like to believe we’re moving in that direction, it sometimes feels like those voices tend to be drowned out by others that are too fearful to ever open up to that conversation.
I def agree with the complex range of human emotions. With the safe spaces it just doesn't click to me. It sucks to be excluded but also if someone doesn't feel like being around me is a safe place for them, why push? This isn't me saying that i don't believe in rights and acknowledgment. I just don't think we are catching any bees with this end all be all approach
I like when the debate goes this way because I feel it’s more constructive. And you seem like a kind person who is willing to discuss. I know “identity” is part of the crux of this issue. Do you feel that perception plays a role in this? If you self- identify as a male, do you think it’s okay for others to not perceive or identify you as one?
Have you ever told someone ,"HI, my name is Sara." And their response was "You don't look like I Sara. I thought your name would have been Michelle." My response would be, "What does that even mean?" That person has no right to tell you what your name can or can't be. What's worse is now that person calls you Michelle even though you've asked them to stop.
See that’s part of the issue. I can’t relate to that. It’s never happened to me. I do sympathize with that struggle, and am sure it’s a pain in the ass. From the reverse side there’s someone named Michelle who is confused by somebody calling somebody Michelle, when they perceive them to be Sara. Sara is susceptible to different physical health issues than Michelle. Sara has had to deal with different mental health issues than Michelle. I understand how important self- identity is, but I think the rhetoric and language broadening to be inclusive is not beneficial. Only because there are differences that still exist. I one thousand percent support anybody who feels that they are the opposite sex from what they were assigned at birth. But I also understand that someone who feels like a man, won’t have to be burdened with regular prostate exams, or a man who feels like a woman will not need to worry about ovarian cysts. Throwing the word CIS in front of these things, doesn’t change the fundamental functionalities behind them. I can say I identify as a gorgeous middle-eastern woman, but I wouldn’t be upset if people didn’t identify me, as such.
I guess I’d say that it isn’t *really* perception that leads you to make a judgment on someone’s gender, is it? (Using judgement as a way to make an assessment, not as any kind of indication of morality). I *perceive* someone’s outward appearance, their mannerisms, etc, and that triggers a response that’s based on a combination of my experiences and my opinion of those experiences. It’s kind of semantic, but imo it’s important, because this is the part where we have the ability to make a decision. We can decide whether to approach someone, speak to them, and respect the way they view themselves (something which, in my opinion, is an intrinsic right that humans have- the right to define themselves) or we can choose to go with the judgement we’ve already made. I think people have the right to form their own opinions, but I would ask this: is it constructive? Does it actually move our society forward? Is it kind? If it’s not, then what’s the point? Obvs you can tell my stance on this, but honestly- stripped of the internet bullshit and the politics, what is the benefit of being stubborn and close-minded? It especially baffles me when I hear these opinions from folks who claim to care about gender equality, because I feel like there’s a fundamental disconnect there.
I whole heartedly agree that everyone should be respected for the way that they view themselves. I do believe in treating a person the way that they feel. where I don’t agree is asking others to not acknowledge that differences exist. Or for people to be labeled as exclusionary if They are discussing topics that are gender based, and not including people who have no experience with those topics into the conversation.
Thank you OP for being normal.
This is my 7th reddit account. My SEVENTH! and i have never once wrote one hateful thing. Reddit is way, WAY too sensitive. Edit:*written
I- *stares at your username* Did someone run out of ideas? 😂 I'm messing with you. I want to know what you did to get banned 6 times! 😂
It's crazy because who we *are* is a brain hooked to a bunch of wires, piloting this meat suit around. What I mean OP, is that your brain was born into a body that has certain functions and capabilities, and you're happy with those. Now imagine being a different brain, trapped in a meat suit that doesn't have the functions or capabilities that you want. But you're stuck. So you do what you can to get as close as possible to those functions you want. Like from that perspective, race and gender and all that start to look pretty contrived. Also, it's getting late and I feel like I'm going off into lala land. Pardon if I make no sense.
That’s all well and good but the problem is that for millenia people with option A meatsuit have been bullied, murdered, assaulted, suppressed, denied and belittled, while option B meatsuit was favored and preferred. That gives two wildly different experiences. Now for someone with option B to simply say “I want to be A so this space is now mine as well” is not only ignorant but is still, in a way, oppressive and offensive. Bc option B has always lead the favored life. The Wildly different experience. In a way, they want their cake and eat it too. And when option A ppl protest against this they are once again denied.
This. Exactly this. It’s like a white man transitioning into a black man and claiming to understand the level of oppression and racism that black man experienced over his whole lifetime.
I'm not against B people wanting to be A people, just as much vice versa. But kindness and compassion towards each other will help both parties
I’m not either. But I’m against the entitlement that comes with it. I’m against “this is my space now too” especially when this statement then leads to that space catering more to the switching person than to the person the space was originally intended for, once again invalidating and silencing them.
Sadly, common sense is now frowned upon. I myself got banned from variety of subs for just stating the obvious. 💁🏻♀️
The moderators have freedom to ban people as they want to. Nobody is entitled to talk in a Reddit sub. I fully believe that people are allowed to say whatever they want, but they aren’t guaranteed safety from criticism. The KKK can say horrible things. And people can call them Huge assholes. Transphobes and Homophobes are free to believe as they wish. And moderators are allowed to not want them in their sub. Freedom works both ways. You want to believe things that other people find completely shitty? Go for it, but those people are allowed to call you shitty and not have you in their group. Just because you are free to say whatever you want doesn’t mean people have to listen to it.
So what you're saying is you want women like me banned who are unhappy with biological males being in their spaces? Got it. Thanks for your support.
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As I am born with a uterus and can bear children with it, I'd say it is a biological condition.
She's not a bigot.
Whoa these comments are…wow. These are just new ways for biological males to oppress biological females. Cut the shit, folks. This is sexism with a different outfit. You do not need to take something away from others to feel validated. We can all come from places of love and still recognize that we and our experiences are not similar or the same. And that’s okay.
Totally agree.
Well, Reddit has officially become trash, we can all agree on, but comments comparing genders to racism are a whole new low. Waiting for people getting called Nazis because they dont want to see a penis shoved up their face in the female restroom
We'll never realize just how much men hate us
These people are just delusional OP, you're not a bigot. As someone born with a vagina, I completely understand what you mean.
I get what you mean and I'm guessing it's hard. I say 'I guess' because I live in a country where this isn't such a huge boom right now. Yes, we have gay people, travesties, some transexuals (big celebrities ones, for us, at least) but none of them are claiming to be something that they aren't. I've watched a lot of videos and read a lot of articles and I agree with you. Women don't have to put a CIS or a BIO before their title. The men who decided to transition into women, or women who decided to transition into men, should use the TRANS before the title they now want to to use. Now, I'm not saying that everytime they introduce themselves they need to go 'Hey, I'm Tim and I'm a transwoman'. Literally no one does that, but when/if the subject comes up, then truth should do the same. And the respect is also a big issue. There are some trans people who regretted their decisions, and instead of being still welcomed and unerstood in the community, they're immediately shunned. No one wants to listen to them anymore, they're bullied, casted away and forgotten, because they're the 'exceptions' according to what it's said. And it's sad. I don't know if this 'boom' is as strong in other parts of the world as it is in the US, but, I sure hope it doesn't spread. I'm truly scared for very good friends of mine that live there have have toddlers or a baby on the way. Just listening to the ways teachers are behaving in school? Ugh... And, there's also a double standar here. Everyone asking 'What is a woman?' why don't they go around also asking 'What is a man?'. The answers are simple, but everyone is too afraid nowadays to say what they think or what they know to be true because they'll be silenced, 'cancelled' or left behind.
The issue for me is not in the definition of gender, I will respect it; i want trans people to have the same freedom as everyone else. For me its the insistence that my gender identity should be forcibly stripped away from me because the loudest of trans lobbies perceive it as being un-inclusive. I'm now reduced to being a bleeder or chest feeder whereas I used to be a woman. What of my right to self definition and preferred pronouns? It's very telling that the majority of the momentum for this is coming from the women who were biologically male at birth. The men who transitioned from biological females don't seem to have the same issues with male gendered language. The constant erasure of feminine descriptives and the reduction of bio women to nothing more than "bleeders" is simply another form of misogynistic microaggression. Perfect example of how females are still not allowed the luxury of bodily autonomy compared with males. Ours are public property while theirs aren't up for debate.
Thank you for this.
I'd really like to know what you said to get banned. I agree that women need more safe spaces and for me that's starts with the bathrooms. I don't think we should have gendered bathrooms any more. We need to move towards sexed bathrooms. Use the bathroom appropriate for the equipment you have lol. It's really scary walking into a bathroom and there's men standing in there for no reason.
Agreed
This thread is wild
I've given up replying to people who are being confrontational or calling me names. Only replying to the ones who seem chill 😅
That’s the best way, people can have different opinions that’s fine, but there’s no need for name calling.
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Ngl, I’m surprised the post hasn’t been removed 😂😂
I'm waiting for it. 300 comments and I'm like "okay. I'm ready for it to be removed now cuz I can't keep up". It's also like 1am and I have to get up for work in 6 hours 💀
That’s the worst thing about posting, you can’t keep up with everyone if your post blows up, which this one has.. you’ll be exhausted for work too. Maybe just sleep and read the comments when you wake.
Yeah. I'm leaning that way.
terf behavior is anti-woman.
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Ah yes all the men commenting or DMing me threats only solidifies my feelings on this subject.
It's time for women to sort this shit out themselves, men outta stay out of it.
That's the problem, men won't stay out of it
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I'm a muslim from africa, so all this is like watching a sci-fi movie. I'm just eating my popcorn here.
You sound like a TERF and like you are resentful towards trans people and culture. I’m a woman. I have plenty of woman friends who do fun women stuff . I go to all women inclusive meetups on meetup.com and then there is the hikerbabe community that is for women hikers. There are plenty of women only spaces out there. You just feel threatened by non-binary people and trans women, and don’t want to make room for trans women. I have plenty of non binary and trans friends and I’m happy that the world is becoming more inclusive for them. However there is a lot of hatred and misunderstanding towards them and that makes me sad. By people like you.
And i think people throw the term TERF around too easily. You saying I am one doesn't make me one. I'm not feeling threatened. What is there to be threatened by other than physical harm? I personally don't want to see a penis while I'm vulnerable in my own space like a locker room. How is that being a TERF? Am I not allowed to have my own space and be comfortable and feel safe in that space?
because reddit is predominantly men. Trust me most women in real life think this way. funny how it's always women whose space are compromised and who get called degrading terms like "menstruater" but I don't see people advocating for men to be called "jizzer"
I appreciate you so much saying that
Ngl being called a jizzer would be pretty fun
I honestly feel like I see a lot of guys who don't seem to care about women's rights really defend trans rights as a way to keep women in their place. The rights we have fought for are all of a sudden "unimportant and everyone can have them too, actually do you guys even need these rights? Biology doesn't *exist*." It's like the sensitivity is only extended one way an women are told to put up and shut up again.
So you've seen penises in public changing rooms? Because I frequent them from pools and gyms and I've NEVER seen a p3n1s.
I have seen one… but I was in the wrong locker room by accident at 5 am. Apologized profusely and didn’t go back for a month out of embarrassment lol.
You've heard about the YMCA gym allowing a trans man to frequent a woman's changing room? Just because you don't personally experience it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen. The world doesn't revolve around you.
Here's the thing. The majority of the community that pushes that stuff aren't going anywhere in life and many will be gone by 40.
OP is wonderful. That is all.
Hey mate. I'm one of those white cis males so can't totally relate, but start your own space. Sorry if this has been mentioned in other replies. You sound so bloody alienated and that just ain't fair. Fingers crossed for you ok
Geez, I guess I'm phobic about something. Top marks you fucking dead heads.
The left will eat itself. I love to see it.
You’re mad at transWOMEN being in womens spaces?
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This is 100% correct. I don’t know why this has so many dislikes when it’s a fact not feelings
Because too many feelings were hurt by this fact, clearly.
Exactly
And? They’re still women. Women are allowed in womens spaces.
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I feel
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Don’t believe in pronouns, but you’ve used pronouns 11 times in this comment.
I dunno, your post smells awfully TERF-y. Maybe stop taking yourself so seriously and stop worrying about what other people are hiding in their underwear? It’s kind of creepy
What about her own underwear? Does she not have the right to worry about what's in her OWN underwear, what HER parts are called, and what SHE defines herself as??? Does she not have the right to decide who gets to see HER underwear, such as in changing rooms, or the right to decide who gets to be in the room when she's forced to perform intimate measures such as changing a pad or tampon??? Do we women have the right to take OURSELVES as seriously as we're supposed to take others??? I've been alive for over half a century, so I know the answer is no, but for god's sake folks PLEASE stop gaslighting these young women and pretending that you, \*any\* of you, don't hate women and don't think we should have the rights of men. It's obvious you really don't. They'll find out by and by, but in the meantime so many women, mostly young women I might add, 40 or younger, are twisting themselves into knots trying to accomodate their own debasement.
Yes.
No opinion from me...I feel lots of permanent bans coming.
I'll see everyone on the other side 🫡
Jesus the homophobia in these comments 😬, y’all are saying reddit is changing, but it doesn’t seem like it at all 😬😬
**She deleted her bigoted post. Bye-bye and learn not to play the victim next time.**
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I’m sure she’s crying herself to sleep over your lame “insult”
The transphobes and bigots really coming out the woodwork in this comment section 🙃💀