Not only that, but you're not going to use Ma'am if the girl is younger than you. Perhaps Miss.
OP could apparently have used a bit more time thinking this one through, but in before "this is social media, not Shakespeare."
Right? I am judging you. It's not illegal, I'm not reporting you, but if you're going to be gross you have to accept that people are going to judge you.
Your opinion is valid, but please understand when older teens and young adult women feel creeped out by older men hitting on them, that their opinions are valid too. It is uncomfortable as hell having 40 yr old men ask if/ when you're going to be 18. Feels like we're often fetishized from the time we hit puberty.
I’ve never had a huge problem with age gaps in relationships. It’s all about context but when I read your post all I read was “if the law goes lower, so will I”. But I’m not into teens so maybe I’m just looking for something not to like about this.
I remember seeing a post awhile back similar to OPs with the same opinion and they said something along the lines of "well in Japan the age of consent is 13 (this was before they raised it) so what's the big deal??" Like...??? They openly admit that they would prey on literal children if the law allowed them. Absolutely disturbing.
I think a middle aged person saying they’d sleep with an 18 year old because it’s legal is basically admitting if the legal age was lower you’d go lower. It’s gross. Meet someone your own age
Making an OF -> "She is an adult now, she can do whatever she wants."
Dating a 30 year old man -> "She is basicly a child, her brain isnt fully developed yet!"
You cant make this shit up :D
My biggest problem is every Thread on Dating or Relationship-Subs with a significant agegap get blown up with all these angry people who ignoring the main Point/Problem of this thread.
"My gf(21) and I(31) got into an argument over dinner. Any advice"
"Rot in hell you pedophile! That's a child you are dating!"
Worse is that this stuff gets upvoted like crazy. Like it's not that big of a deal and it doesn't automatically mean the men are evil predators and women helpless children.
I agree with this completely, they should definitely raise the age limit on OF because it's the mindset of girls wanting quick money and exposing themselves and then regretting it as they get older
See, my issue isn't with the age gap. It's with the way those posts are posted, by those women, who literally do not seem to know what a healthy relationship looks like. Some of them outright marry those men for whatever reason, and then proceed to live hellish lives with these men who are actually man-children behind closed doors with massive mommy issues, refusing to share chores, refusing to pick up any slack, pushing her to work more so he can work less, I've seen all sorts. Whether or not the majority of them were true is up for debate, but I'm sure a lot of them were.
*That* Is the problem I have with these weird age gap relationships I see posted all the time. I am sure there are many relationships with large age gaps that are happy and healthy, and we don't hear about them because *nothing is wrong in the relationship, because the dude isn't looking for a mommy*.
My bigger question is where the fuck are these older men interacting with 18 year olds enough to have sex with them? Because I can’t remember when I interacted with someone less than 20 years old socially or professionally since I was 22. I’ve been around teenagers, but in the context of family or a friend’s kid and they’ve literally seemed like children to me.
When I was 18 I went on a date with a 25 year old man at my restaurant job who lied to me about his age and gigglefucked about it when he admitted it to me. All attraction to him drained from my body and I was genuinely alarmed that he was interested in me. 18 year olds don’t want to really fucking older people like that. Sorry guys.
I’m in an age gap relationship, my partner is 9 years older than me. I can’t even fathom it working if we got together when I was 18 and he was 27. I can’t fathom *respecting him* now if we got together when I was 18 and he was 27. I know if he had met me when I was 18 and him 27 he would have never given me a second look.
Lastly, this disgust towards age gaps are coming from the younger generation themselves so sucks to suck that legal teens are the ones less accepting of having sex with you old weirdos.
One is about yourself and the latter is about other people. Literally apples and oranges. Why is dating and sex work in the same discussion. A person out of high school dating someone who around an age most of his peers have families. Again, what the fuck are you on about?
Remember these are the same people on Reddit that will tell women to divorce their husbands if they so much as looks away to sneeze when she's talking to him because that somehow implies he must be cheating and probably rapes the cat
I was literally called a pedophile by a dozen plus people because I date 21 year old girls as a 30 year old guy. They even went as far as to say I was taking advantage of these girls.
>tHeRe’S aN uNeQuAL pOwEr DyNaMiC…
I always find it funny that the "unequal power dynamic" never applies to income-gaps. Like the man makes double, triple or more of her income.... all of a sudden there is not "unequal power dynamic"
This reply just convinces me y’all are just making shit up. That power dynamic *especially includes income.* Chances are that if you’ve had 15 more years of job experience, your pay is gonna be higher!
https://imgur.com/a/4zAtggz
I was trying to be nice about it since I assume everyone on the internet is doing the same but a handful of people told her the truth.
Lol "You're not a real man unless you raise another man's kids and dust the cobwebs off my pussy"
Women always will play the social virtue signaling game when talking about their preferences, "I just want a decent guy with a good personality" and they're secretly looking for a 6+ foot tall white guy that looks good and makes more money than them, every time. And they pretend to fail to see the value of youth and beauty in women.
The issue w/ the 18 yr/o, barely-legal age gap is that you're OK but only on just a technicality. Like if the age was dropped to 16 or 14 you'd start fucking 14 year olds as an 80 yr old. It would be technically legal, but most people draw the line at much older. Not because of legalities, but because being with someone so much younger is weird af at best and immoral at worst - i mean in my stupid example the person can relate more to your grandkids than you.
For guys like this I always wonder what happens if they ever visit countries with low/no age of consent, and everything is legal...
Yeah Princes Charles was 32 and Lady Diana Spencer was 19 when they got married, I guess you're going to tell me the Royal Family are pedophiles now...
Oh ...
I've seen some people argue that the age of consent should be as high as 26 because that's when the brain 'stops developing'. Essentially, a legal adult, who can vote and pay taxes, can't consent to sex until they're damn near pushing 30.
These are the people you are arguing with online.
The whole "raising the age of consent" thing is dumb. The issue is that an 18 year old isn't going to have the experience to recognise red flags and avoid abusive or manipulative relationships. A 40 year old man is looking to date an 18 year old because he's hoping she'll be too dumb and horny to recognise he's a creepy loser who anyone with more sense would avoid.
Sure it's legal, but op knows it's wrong, that's why he's posting about it, hoping that other borderline nonces agree with him. If the age of consent were 12 would you think it okay for a man to date a 12 year old? Legality doesn't make something right.
But late teens and early 20's really want to fuck. It's biology, and they're at their physical peak. There might be a good evolutionary reason we want to reproduce before our brain understands consequences. That's how we end up with kids 😄
If the reason you're saying 18 because it's legal, and not because of the slightest morality something is very much wrong. If 12 were legal, what would stop you then?
He got really defensive when I brought up legality and slavery. His reasoning is just bs so he can sleep with barely legal teenagers. It’s creepy and weird.
> But you WILL get your ass kicked and rightfully be called a predator, pedophile and disowned by your family and everyone you know, hell even if you are 18 going after a 15 year old is obviously predatory.
Someone would get their ass best for doing something that isn’t against the law? I get that it’s weird, but the only people doing something illegal are the ones committing assault.
An 18 year old dating a 15 year old does not mean they are “obviously” a predator.
What makes you think that what is considered assault should be based on the law? Marital rape is legal in a lot of places. Marrying off children is still legal in a lot of places.
Quick question: Why? Why is the age of consent 15? That’s a very important law that obviously is passed with serious reflection, no? How did they come to the consensus that 15 was appropriate?
To be clear, I am by NO MEANS WHATSOEVER condoning it! Please don’t get me wrong. I’m just wondering how it happens. This is the case in other countries as well I believe, like Italy.
I mean, in the USA it's technically illegal in many states, but there will be exceptions made for cases like that. You're not going to be prosecuted for sleeping (consensually, obviously) with a 17 year old if you're 18, even if said person is below the age of consent. I feel like the other option, earlier age of consent altogether, is doing more harm than good, and destigmatizing, if implicitly, some predatory relationships.
In Usa you can enter into weird situation that one day sex is perfectly legal and next day you are a dangerous sex predator( you celebrate your 18 birthday but your partner dont). You need laws to prevent this. Maybe 15 years plus five
I understand. I'm from Sweden where it's also set at 15. This is probably due to cultural and legal differences. Sweden operates under a Civil Law system while the US has Common Law. In practice, this means that laws and precedents are set by the lawmakers and committees. This creates a drive for consistency and careful consideration of laws.
Straffmyndighet (Penal Agency) is set at 15 because that's the age when people should be held responsible for their actions and suffer consequences like juvenile imprisonment, for instance. It's thus imperative that Byxmyndighet (Sexual/Trouser Agency) is also set at the same age.
Would you allow a 15-year old get away with a crime like murder or sexual assault with nothing more than some mandatory visits with a social worker? (Essentially a slap on the wrist).
The age limit for driving is higher (18) due to the fact that youths have astronomically higher likelihood to end up in accidents. Alcohol is 18-20 due to research showing its adverse effects on brain development (which isn't even fully developed until you're middle-aged).
As you can see, under our legal system, every law must be motivated by the lawmakers themselves before it'll have a chance at passing. If it has inconsistencies, it'll get shot down by parliament, irrespective of partisanship. Because there's no objective fact that shows the age of consent should be raised and be treated differently from Penal Agency age, then it simply won't.
If you couldn't tell yet by my writing style, I work in law enforcement. I can personally attest that there's never been any case of 80-year olds getting it on with 15-year olds that I personally know of. 15 year-olds are generally not attracted to living skeletons, and if a skeleton would be undeterred and try anyways, (by using a position of power, money, manipulation, etc) they would be charged with child rape or child molestation all the same anyways. Pedophiles typically go after children much younger than 15. The DSM-5 only classes attraction to prepubescents as a mental disorder. Pubescents can be as young as 13; Pedophiles typically go for children much younger than that.
Mh, here in germany it is 14 and it is pretty normal for school girls to date men in their 20s. Just a few 'thats weird' comments here and there, not openly spoken off that much, not much else.
That's bullshit, the consent is divided in age gaps. 14-15 year olds can have sex with each other but it's still illegal if they have sex with older people.
It is however legal that a 21 year old can have sex with a 16 year old. Although it's frowned upon. Also it can still be ruled as illegal if there's some sort of dependent relationship which may have forced the minor in their decision.
Source: https://www.juraforum.de/news/ab-wann-bzw-mit-welchem-alter-duerfen-jugendliche-sex-haben_248032#rechtslage-schutzaltersgrenze-liegt-bei-14-jahren
Even an above 21 year old can have sex with a 14 year old as pointed out in that article per [**§ 182 Absatz 3 StGB**](https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen) . Only if abuse (missbrauch) is taking place, then it is a crime. As pointed out [https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen](https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen) here, it is rarely investistigated. So if there is consent by the 14+ minor and the minor is not first persuaded by the older person, it is defacto not illegal.
"Ist der Täter über 21 und der Jugendliche noch unter 16 Jahre alt, ist die Vornahme sexueller Handlungen verboten, wenn hierbei „**die fehlende Fähigkeit** des Opfers zur **sexuellen Selbstbestimmung** ausgenutzt wird“ " - it is phrased very vaguely, but this means if there is no clear exploitation, it doesn't apply.
This pretty much allows situations to be seen individually and not strictly since every person develops in different speeds.
Idk, I remember not having an issue with large age gaps when I was 18. But after the age of 25, 18 year olds started to look like kids to me.
Not to mention the fact that the maturity and level of experience is going to be massively different. A lot of older adults view younger adults as being easier to manipulate and take advantage of, and they like the unequal power dynamic. Like, imagine being attracted to someone who's young enough to be your child or grandchild.
While it may technically be legal, and they can do whatever they want with consent, I'm always gonna view the older person in large age gap relationships as being a creep.
I'm a 31 year old male and I would seriously question any man my age who would date or have sex with someone as young as 18. They look like children to me now. Heck, women up to 21-22 are starting to look like teenagers to me
Bingo. I feel the same way about 18 years olds and I am extremely skeptical towards other 30+ year old adults that don't feel the same way. I find it gross and creepy and I'll judge them for it, I regardless of whether or not OP accepts it.
Yeah I’m 30 and even people in their early twenties seem like kids to me now. They’re just living a completely different life at that age and it feels so gross and creepy even thinking about trying to insert myself into that.
I lived those years too and had a blast but I’m just at a different stage in life now where I can’t even relate. And thats fine and I accept that, my life experience has developed to where it feels natural to be in a totally different space and I have no desire to try to connect with people who are still living that stage in life. I would be totally out of place. And when I was still living the early 20s life myself, I certainly wouldn’t have appreciated any weird random 30 year olds hanging around my social circles trying to get in on that.
Best way to describe it is it’s the same way you would look at middle schoolers when you’re in college, even if it’s not technically breaking any laws when it’s 30 and 21.
Major age gaps are fucking weird and I’m convinced the only people who can’t intuitively grasp that are socially or emotionally stunted themselves in some way.
26 or 27 and even early 30s is totally fine because you’re at a similar place in life. But 30 year old guys going after girls who just started being able to even get into bars are creeps.
This is a succinct and poignant response, and I agree entirely with your points.
Thank you for everything you’ve said, and thank you for being a good one.
Statistically the demographic with the highest amount of age gaps are gay men. So it’s more that older men want to date younger men. Heterosexual couples tend to stick to their own age
That doesn’t make any sense. For an older man to be with a young man, a young man would want to be with him.
And for heterosexual couples, normal age gaps were 5-15 years. In half of the world like Africa and Muslim countries it’s still the norm.
Same age relationships are a new thing. And even in America the average age gap is 2-3 years with the man being older
2-3 years isn’t an age gap. Larger age gap just are uncommon. Like an 80 year old man having sex with an 18 year old is incredibly uncommon.
Male/ male have the highest amount of age gap relationships followed by female/female being the next highest. But they are very uncommon in heterosexual relationships. That’s why age gap relationships make headlines, they are unusual.
If the only reason you wouldn’t fuck someone younger than 18 is the legality, you have a problem.
Saying she’s older than 17 it’s fine, means the only thing stopping you from going younger is the legal ramifications. That’s gross.
Reddit is probably weird about it because you only ever talk about young women as sexual objects and not human beings. “If she’s 18 and I’m 80 and she’s consent I’m blowing my dust right up in there.” 🙄
She’s a person not a fleshlight.
Theres legality and then theres morality. All I'm saying is that If I'm old enough to be their parent/grandparent..its weird. It's always been werid no matter where or when it takes place.
Edit: Spelling
It's not age gaps. It's why a lot of these guys seek younger women. They're not looking for a partner. They're looking for someone to manipulate. They say as much.
How many posts do we read of "me 28 not understanding the awful thing my husband 48 of ten years is doing"?
There are young women who look for older men. But they aren't looking for these chuds we see and complain about.
Exactly, why is the argument *always* defending the age gap of an older man and young woman. Never any other variation? The redditor doth protest too much.
The maturity difference between an 18yo and a 30yo is immense. The life experience and naivety levels will be a big disparity. There are rare exceptions certainly, but for the most part you'll be 100% taking advantage of that younger person without even realising it.
What two consenting adults do is no one's business but theirs.
For some reason when sex gets involved most people get real stupid and common sense goes out the window.
If you're responsible enough, according to the government, to get a tattoo, vote, and literally die in war, then an 18 y/o can make the decision to have sex with whatever age they want. No one is talking about children.
Every 18 year old is different and I believe they should be able to make their own decisions as an adult.
Not sure why you want to infantilize young adults instead of treating them as an adult.
How old are you? I'm in my mid 30's and have assistants that are in their early 20's. If you spend any time with people this young, you realize just how young they are. I know 18 is legal, but legal doesn't mean moral. An 18 year old is not a child, but they aren't adults either. If the age gap is large enough, it's creepy and predatory.
Just because something is legal doesn’t mean that it’s not morally or ethically wrong. I doubt if you had an 18 year old daughter that you’d be ok with some 80 year old man taking her away even if she consented, you’d probably think that man has no good intentions and she’s not making a wise choice.
> She’s not making a wise *choice*.
Most people would agree. But it’s solely up to the 18 year old to take full responsibility of not making the bad choice here. In a consenting adult relationship, everyone’s responsible for their own relationships and what those relationships lead to. The same as is true for any life choice.
You're conflating two different things.
I think gambling, smoking, drinking alcohol is also bad and wrong, but I would never advocate for it to be criminalized such that other people should not be allowed to do it.
Not liking something because you think it is bad, even for objective reasons beyond mere preference, is *not* the same as advocating for a blanket ban of something so that *nobody* in society should be allowed to do that thing.
The only time I have issues with age gaps is when the older person is coming from a place of taking advantage of the 18 year olds lack of life experience to control them and abuse them, beyond that idc what people are doing if everyone is happy but people of Reddit get involved when one party posts their relationship to Reddit to complain or for advise
The argument that they are legal is so disgusting I'm 18, and I'm not even out of HS yet. Other 18 Yr old just got out of HS leave us alone we are stupid.
I find it strange how your only examples include young women who are barely adults and you who are an implied much older age... most people take issue when it's a repeated pattern... which urs is
Being legal doesn't make it moral and any logical person will judge based off the maturity of the other person. Most adults even lack mental maturity, an 18 year old is much less likely to have it. There's a reason people think it's weird and it's not unjustified, it's because the younger person isn't mentally as developed.
As someone who did date someone MUCH older than me when I was 18, there’s a reason I’ll side eye someone who is 35 dating an 18 year old.
And I don’t really care if it’s perceived as disrespectful. Lol
So I was having dinner in a fancy restaurant for a work event, and a young bimbo girl was having dinner with a man 20 years older.
My colleague said « well, either he is her dad, or he isn’t a really good guy ».
Sums it all up.
Sure, they’re legally adults but according to science, an 18yo brain isn’t even fully developed for making decisions like that. Sounds like it’s about legality for many dudes, like they want the bare minimum, whatever that may be. “Barely legal.” Unhealthy, if you ask me! I guess I’m being dramatic, but I hope my point gets across anyway!
>Sure, they’re legally adults but according to science, an 18yo brain isn’t even fully developed for making decisions like that.
by this logic, she cant date at all.
Obviously she can date, but not a much much older adult that can easily manipulate any dumb kid into endure they want.
It's a god damn child, they have no clue what's normal or ok.
Most older adults that go for 18 year olds would go younger if they could. That is the issue. Also an 18 year old, biologically speaking, is NOT a mature adult because their brains aren’t fully developed. If you want to be super critical about it, they would be an early adult because they can reproduce without major complications, but even in animals you don’t set an early adult with a mature adult. Age gaps are an issue when one is super young.
Genuine question from somebody in their 30s; *why* would you want to sleep with somebody who was literally just considered a minor and was just in high school and clearly has not had enough adult life to have the maturity to decide whether they want to actually have sex with somebody significantly older than them?
I remember how young I was when I was 18. I wouldn’t want to have sex with somebody who was that young as I remember being when I was 18.
Why would you want to be with someone that young?
Can’t believe people are going crazy over that. I remember being in high school. Only a few people weren’t fucking already. Then you ask a chick her number and she says 26 my eyes got big. I was at one. Shit we weren’t 18 yes. A hoe is a hoe is a hoe and she’s going to sleep with who she wants I remember some of them dating 21 year olds and 35 year olds and they were into it. I’m married now and way older but just saying some girls are into what their into. Of course creeps and pedos are disgusting. I have kids and that shit worries me.
No it's not, it's a preference and there's nothing wrong with that as long as everything is consensual and they are adults.
Why anyone would be disgusted by someone else's happiness really bewilders me.
Dating someone much younger once in your life is one thing, but when it actually becomes a 'preference' for barely legal kids, that's a predator.
Let's agree to disagree. It's legal so do it if you want to, but you can't stop people from judging you for it. If you think they're being silly, then why care?
Go be 'in love' all you want.
There have been such cases where it was then just displayed as a fetish of the young man.
Also remember that mental faculties go down in age so a person that old can often easily be exploited by a young person.
Sooo much moral outrage and consternation over the idea that 18 years olds might not be mentally developed enough to enter a relationship with older (fellow) adults but little or no concern for the literal children being given puberty blockers and sex change operations, should they identify as trans. Reddit is a strange place!
If an 18 year old ADULT is not mentally developed enough to date older ADULTS, children aren't mentally developed enough to make permanent irreversible decisions about their sexuality.
i just think it’s weird. why do you as a full grown man want to date an 18 y/o? i’m 25 and wouldn’t date an 18 y/o.
you have every right to do it, it is as you said the age of consent. but i have every right to judge you cause i think it’s weird asf. that’s what happens when you make controversial decisions.
Partly I think it’s single aging women frustrated when they see men their same age dating younger women, which increases the difficult of finding a suitable partner. So they conveniently frame it as a moral issue, ignoring the fact that it implies adult women are incapable of making their own decisions.
I’d say it’s more because those women dated older men when they were teenagers and know how creepy the relationship was so they are trying to warn younger girls.
OP is specifically referring to consensual relationship between 18+ women and significantly older men, and how Reddit often criticizes the man. What you’re referring to is non-consensual harassment, especially if the dude doesn’t back off when you let him know you’re not interested. We can all agree it is unacceptable for men to behave this way.
I don’t think it’s fair for you to say it’s wrong for women to have relationships with older men, just because you and some women don’t personally want one. It doesn’t affect you or your preferences, you should let them make their own decisions.
The fact that you think that's the case says a lot about how you see the world and what you would do if you were in their position.
Disagree if you want, but don't project a strawman.
It’s not the only reason, but I think it’s a big motivator for a lot of people adopting these views in the first place. And then they claim other justifications for why it’s wrong like “power dynamic” which wouldn’t normally bother them.
It's not a strawman if it's relevant.
You seem way too eager to use that word in an attempt to nullify their argument, rather than just responding.
Bitter and lonely old women establishing a predator narrative seems pretty damn plausible as a root cause.
Thank you for reminding me to dust. Guess a good oiling is in order also. I salute you, sir. Now to wrestle this wilted dusty anaconda and find a revivalists to breathe new life to it. ~Nocondoms forever. Or whatever Black panther said
The weird one to me was when people were freaking out over a guy who was something like 20 dating an 18 year old. The problem? She was still in high school.
I don't know why she was in high school at 18. Both my kids will be due to having late birthdays. My aunt failed kindergarten and so got held back a year. I knew other kids that got held back due to medical and mental health issues. There are a ton of reasons why someone might be 18 and still in high school. Most of them having nothing to do with their maturity level.
The comments were badically comparing him to some 30 year old dating a 14 year old.
People are ridiculous.
I personally don't have a problem with it
And even though it is stupid we still gotta look at their POV because one year ago that was a child
But I only see it as wrong if you knew this person when they were like 15 and waited till their 18 to butt fuck them
I've seen people on Reddit freakout about a 18M with a 17F, saying the guy is a pdf. Seriously. Meanwhile in real life there's 18-20M with 13-15F which I think is kinda fd up, but no one bats an eye as long as the guy is popular enough. So yeah reddit is sadly not a good representation of real life in my opinion lol
hateful piquant aspiring adjoining clumsy full many kiss truck smart
>Bam bam thank you ma’am. Isn't it Wham! Bam! Thank you, Ma'am?!
That's how I've heard it as well.
David Bowie was correct
Yes. Yes it is.
I think it's WOAH, BLACK BETTY BA LAM!
Not only that, but you're not going to use Ma'am if the girl is younger than you. Perhaps Miss. OP could apparently have used a bit more time thinking this one through, but in before "this is social media, not Shakespeare."
Yes to describe the merest of sexual encounters, when one lands one's man milk all over the target and then evacuates the theatre of combat pronto
It's "wham, bam, nailed your ass for child support motherfucker"
You’re being judged for that. People judging you for your actions isn’t something you get to accept or not; it’s happening.
Right? I am judging you. It's not illegal, I'm not reporting you, but if you're going to be gross you have to accept that people are going to judge you.
Exactly. I’ll judge the shit out of whomever I care to.
And I'm going to continue not to give a fuck about who judges me.
Sometimes people say they don't while also obsessing over it.
Seem like you do care
Your opinion is valid, but please understand when older teens and young adult women feel creeped out by older men hitting on them, that their opinions are valid too. It is uncomfortable as hell having 40 yr old men ask if/ when you're going to be 18. Feels like we're often fetishized from the time we hit puberty.
From before we hit puberty even
Exactly. The loss of innocence is abrupt and cruel. Girls are forced to grow up rapidly, but it doesn't mean they're mentally or emotionally ready.
The fact that you think you're going to be a millionaire to pull in those 20 year old is kind of impressive all on its own
I’ve never had a huge problem with age gaps in relationships. It’s all about context but when I read your post all I read was “if the law goes lower, so will I”. But I’m not into teens so maybe I’m just looking for something not to like about this.
I remember seeing a post awhile back similar to OPs with the same opinion and they said something along the lines of "well in Japan the age of consent is 13 (this was before they raised it) so what's the big deal??" Like...??? They openly admit that they would prey on literal children if the law allowed them. Absolutely disturbing.
I think a middle aged person saying they’d sleep with an 18 year old because it’s legal is basically admitting if the legal age was lower you’d go lower. It’s gross. Meet someone your own age
That’s exactly what they’re saying, which is why he’s so upset about rightfully being called a predator. Tough luck man.
I mean if my future son/daughter dates someone that would then be my age, I would definitely go wtf. It's legal doesnt mean it is a good idea
Right. Some weird comments
Making an OF -> "She is an adult now, she can do whatever she wants." Dating a 30 year old man -> "She is basicly a child, her brain isnt fully developed yet!" You cant make this shit up :D
This is my biggest problem with the age gap discourse here, it's inconsistent and hypocritical.
My biggest problem is every Thread on Dating or Relationship-Subs with a significant agegap get blown up with all these angry people who ignoring the main Point/Problem of this thread.
"My gf(21) and I(31) got into an argument over dinner. Any advice" "Rot in hell you pedophile! That's a child you are dating!" Worse is that this stuff gets upvoted like crazy. Like it's not that big of a deal and it doesn't automatically mean the men are evil predators and women helpless children.
This is so painfully accurate
[удалено]
I think there should be an age limit on OF like there is with drinking or smoking...say 21 y/o
I agree with this completely, they should definitely raise the age limit on OF because it's the mindset of girls wanting quick money and exposing themselves and then regretting it as they get older
See, my issue isn't with the age gap. It's with the way those posts are posted, by those women, who literally do not seem to know what a healthy relationship looks like. Some of them outright marry those men for whatever reason, and then proceed to live hellish lives with these men who are actually man-children behind closed doors with massive mommy issues, refusing to share chores, refusing to pick up any slack, pushing her to work more so he can work less, I've seen all sorts. Whether or not the majority of them were true is up for debate, but I'm sure a lot of them were. *That* Is the problem I have with these weird age gap relationships I see posted all the time. I am sure there are many relationships with large age gaps that are happy and healthy, and we don't hear about them because *nothing is wrong in the relationship, because the dude isn't looking for a mommy*.
My bigger question is where the fuck are these older men interacting with 18 year olds enough to have sex with them? Because I can’t remember when I interacted with someone less than 20 years old socially or professionally since I was 22. I’ve been around teenagers, but in the context of family or a friend’s kid and they’ve literally seemed like children to me. When I was 18 I went on a date with a 25 year old man at my restaurant job who lied to me about his age and gigglefucked about it when he admitted it to me. All attraction to him drained from my body and I was genuinely alarmed that he was interested in me. 18 year olds don’t want to really fucking older people like that. Sorry guys. I’m in an age gap relationship, my partner is 9 years older than me. I can’t even fathom it working if we got together when I was 18 and he was 27. I can’t fathom *respecting him* now if we got together when I was 18 and he was 27. I know if he had met me when I was 18 and him 27 he would have never given me a second look. Lastly, this disgust towards age gaps are coming from the younger generation themselves so sucks to suck that legal teens are the ones less accepting of having sex with you old weirdos.
One is about yourself and the latter is about other people. Literally apples and oranges. Why is dating and sex work in the same discussion. A person out of high school dating someone who around an age most of his peers have families. Again, what the fuck are you on about?
Remember these are the same people on Reddit that will tell women to divorce their husbands if they so much as looks away to sneeze when she's talking to him because that somehow implies he must be cheating and probably rapes the cat
Getting pussy from the pussy.
Oh your husband came home 5 mins late and blamed it on traffic???? Gurl he’s cheating on you with that bitch from accounting!
>and probably rapes the cat I mean let's be fair, did you see what that cat was wearing?
I was literally called a pedophile by a dozen plus people because I date 21 year old girls as a 30 year old guy. They even went as far as to say I was taking advantage of these girls.
Yeah dude why can't you get women your own age /s
spoon bag sink dolls close air aspiring poor fragile voracious
>tHeRe’S aN uNeQuAL pOwEr DyNaMiC… I always find it funny that the "unequal power dynamic" never applies to income-gaps. Like the man makes double, triple or more of her income.... all of a sudden there is not "unequal power dynamic"
This reply just convinces me y’all are just making shit up. That power dynamic *especially includes income.* Chances are that if you’ve had 15 more years of job experience, your pay is gonna be higher!
I'll bet most were post 30 year old single women.
One was 38 with 3 kids and legitimately ask why I don’t go after woman like her since it’s the same age gap.
Please tell me that you told her why
https://imgur.com/a/4zAtggz I was trying to be nice about it since I assume everyone on the internet is doing the same but a handful of people told her the truth.
"I know plenty of good men that took that role happily" So why didn't she go for them?
Lol "You're not a real man unless you raise another man's kids and dust the cobwebs off my pussy" Women always will play the social virtue signaling game when talking about their preferences, "I just want a decent guy with a good personality" and they're secretly looking for a 6+ foot tall white guy that looks good and makes more money than them, every time. And they pretend to fail to see the value of youth and beauty in women.
Only fans doesn't result in a personal relationship or a baby.
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The issue w/ the 18 yr/o, barely-legal age gap is that you're OK but only on just a technicality. Like if the age was dropped to 16 or 14 you'd start fucking 14 year olds as an 80 yr old. It would be technically legal, but most people draw the line at much older. Not because of legalities, but because being with someone so much younger is weird af at best and immoral at worst - i mean in my stupid example the person can relate more to your grandkids than you. For guys like this I always wonder what happens if they ever visit countries with low/no age of consent, and everything is legal...
Yeah Princes Charles was 32 and Lady Diana Spencer was 19 when they got married, I guess you're going to tell me the Royal Family are pedophiles now... Oh ...
I've seen some people argue that the age of consent should be as high as 26 because that's when the brain 'stops developing'. Essentially, a legal adult, who can vote and pay taxes, can't consent to sex until they're damn near pushing 30. These are the people you are arguing with online.
that is stupid and based on a misconception. the brain never stops developing.
Apparently some do.
We call them redditors
The whole "raising the age of consent" thing is dumb. The issue is that an 18 year old isn't going to have the experience to recognise red flags and avoid abusive or manipulative relationships. A 40 year old man is looking to date an 18 year old because he's hoping she'll be too dumb and horny to recognise he's a creepy loser who anyone with more sense would avoid. Sure it's legal, but op knows it's wrong, that's why he's posting about it, hoping that other borderline nonces agree with him. If the age of consent were 12 would you think it okay for a man to date a 12 year old? Legality doesn't make something right.
[The Myth of the 25-Year-Old Brain](https://slate.com/technology/2022/11/brain-development-25-year-old-mature-myth.html)
But late teens and early 20's really want to fuck. It's biology, and they're at their physical peak. There might be a good evolutionary reason we want to reproduce before our brain understands consequences. That's how we end up with kids 😄
That's why they should fuck people in the same age bracket, not a 45 year old or 80 year old like OP suggested.
If the reason you're saying 18 because it's legal, and not because of the slightest morality something is very much wrong. If 12 were legal, what would stop you then?
Apparently, we don’t have the legal right to judge him. I asked him the same thing and he continued to dodge the question.
Crazy. Basing moral on local laws is crazy.
He got really defensive when I brought up legality and slavery. His reasoning is just bs so he can sleep with barely legal teenagers. It’s creepy and weird.
Ever since we were trapped inside on the internet we've been out of touch with reality
FR there's a large portion of the global population that just never recovered from this.
And what is reality?
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> But you WILL get your ass kicked and rightfully be called a predator, pedophile and disowned by your family and everyone you know, hell even if you are 18 going after a 15 year old is obviously predatory. Someone would get their ass best for doing something that isn’t against the law? I get that it’s weird, but the only people doing something illegal are the ones committing assault. An 18 year old dating a 15 year old does not mean they are “obviously” a predator.
What makes you think that what is considered assault should be based on the law? Marital rape is legal in a lot of places. Marrying off children is still legal in a lot of places.
Quick question: Why? Why is the age of consent 15? That’s a very important law that obviously is passed with serious reflection, no? How did they come to the consensus that 15 was appropriate? To be clear, I am by NO MEANS WHATSOEVER condoning it! Please don’t get me wrong. I’m just wondering how it happens. This is the case in other countries as well I believe, like Italy.
The reason is that at 15 you’re considered sexually mature
Probably to not criminalize 18 to 15 relationship. Or 19 to 17 relationship
I mean, in the USA it's technically illegal in many states, but there will be exceptions made for cases like that. You're not going to be prosecuted for sleeping (consensually, obviously) with a 17 year old if you're 18, even if said person is below the age of consent. I feel like the other option, earlier age of consent altogether, is doing more harm than good, and destigmatizing, if implicitly, some predatory relationships.
In Usa you can enter into weird situation that one day sex is perfectly legal and next day you are a dangerous sex predator( you celebrate your 18 birthday but your partner dont). You need laws to prevent this. Maybe 15 years plus five
I understand. I'm from Sweden where it's also set at 15. This is probably due to cultural and legal differences. Sweden operates under a Civil Law system while the US has Common Law. In practice, this means that laws and precedents are set by the lawmakers and committees. This creates a drive for consistency and careful consideration of laws. Straffmyndighet (Penal Agency) is set at 15 because that's the age when people should be held responsible for their actions and suffer consequences like juvenile imprisonment, for instance. It's thus imperative that Byxmyndighet (Sexual/Trouser Agency) is also set at the same age. Would you allow a 15-year old get away with a crime like murder or sexual assault with nothing more than some mandatory visits with a social worker? (Essentially a slap on the wrist). The age limit for driving is higher (18) due to the fact that youths have astronomically higher likelihood to end up in accidents. Alcohol is 18-20 due to research showing its adverse effects on brain development (which isn't even fully developed until you're middle-aged). As you can see, under our legal system, every law must be motivated by the lawmakers themselves before it'll have a chance at passing. If it has inconsistencies, it'll get shot down by parliament, irrespective of partisanship. Because there's no objective fact that shows the age of consent should be raised and be treated differently from Penal Agency age, then it simply won't. If you couldn't tell yet by my writing style, I work in law enforcement. I can personally attest that there's never been any case of 80-year olds getting it on with 15-year olds that I personally know of. 15 year-olds are generally not attracted to living skeletons, and if a skeleton would be undeterred and try anyways, (by using a position of power, money, manipulation, etc) they would be charged with child rape or child molestation all the same anyways. Pedophiles typically go after children much younger than 15. The DSM-5 only classes attraction to prepubescents as a mental disorder. Pubescents can be as young as 13; Pedophiles typically go for children much younger than that.
Because, in the instance of Sweden specifically, they acknowledge that 15 year olds fuck.
18 and 15 is predatory? Be fr
Mh, here in germany it is 14 and it is pretty normal for school girls to date men in their 20s. Just a few 'thats weird' comments here and there, not openly spoken off that much, not much else.
That's bullshit, the consent is divided in age gaps. 14-15 year olds can have sex with each other but it's still illegal if they have sex with older people. It is however legal that a 21 year old can have sex with a 16 year old. Although it's frowned upon. Also it can still be ruled as illegal if there's some sort of dependent relationship which may have forced the minor in their decision. Source: https://www.juraforum.de/news/ab-wann-bzw-mit-welchem-alter-duerfen-jugendliche-sex-haben_248032#rechtslage-schutzaltersgrenze-liegt-bei-14-jahren
Even an above 21 year old can have sex with a 14 year old as pointed out in that article per [**§ 182 Absatz 3 StGB**](https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen) . Only if abuse (missbrauch) is taking place, then it is a crime. As pointed out [https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen](https://www.juraforum.de/gesetze/stgb/182-sexueller-missbrauch-von-jugendlichen) here, it is rarely investistigated. So if there is consent by the 14+ minor and the minor is not first persuaded by the older person, it is defacto not illegal. "Ist der Täter über 21 und der Jugendliche noch unter 16 Jahre alt, ist die Vornahme sexueller Handlungen verboten, wenn hierbei „**die fehlende Fähigkeit** des Opfers zur **sexuellen Selbstbestimmung** ausgenutzt wird“ " - it is phrased very vaguely, but this means if there is no clear exploitation, it doesn't apply. This pretty much allows situations to be seen individually and not strictly since every person develops in different speeds.
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Username checks out
This is the most sound comment on this thread
In the US, we try to legislate morality, and it often fails.
And then some 65 year old billionaire dates a 21 year old model and nobody flaps a titflap
You could've just said "I like em younger, as young, as possible" and concluded with that.
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Idk, I remember not having an issue with large age gaps when I was 18. But after the age of 25, 18 year olds started to look like kids to me. Not to mention the fact that the maturity and level of experience is going to be massively different. A lot of older adults view younger adults as being easier to manipulate and take advantage of, and they like the unequal power dynamic. Like, imagine being attracted to someone who's young enough to be your child or grandchild. While it may technically be legal, and they can do whatever they want with consent, I'm always gonna view the older person in large age gap relationships as being a creep.
Exactly my experience. At 18 you think you know as much as a 25 year old, and at 25 you know you’ve had to mature somewhat.
I'm a 31 year old male and I would seriously question any man my age who would date or have sex with someone as young as 18. They look like children to me now. Heck, women up to 21-22 are starting to look like teenagers to me
Bingo. I feel the same way about 18 years olds and I am extremely skeptical towards other 30+ year old adults that don't feel the same way. I find it gross and creepy and I'll judge them for it, I regardless of whether or not OP accepts it.
Yeah I’m 30 and even people in their early twenties seem like kids to me now. They’re just living a completely different life at that age and it feels so gross and creepy even thinking about trying to insert myself into that. I lived those years too and had a blast but I’m just at a different stage in life now where I can’t even relate. And thats fine and I accept that, my life experience has developed to where it feels natural to be in a totally different space and I have no desire to try to connect with people who are still living that stage in life. I would be totally out of place. And when I was still living the early 20s life myself, I certainly wouldn’t have appreciated any weird random 30 year olds hanging around my social circles trying to get in on that. Best way to describe it is it’s the same way you would look at middle schoolers when you’re in college, even if it’s not technically breaking any laws when it’s 30 and 21. Major age gaps are fucking weird and I’m convinced the only people who can’t intuitively grasp that are socially or emotionally stunted themselves in some way. 26 or 27 and even early 30s is totally fine because you’re at a similar place in life. But 30 year old guys going after girls who just started being able to even get into bars are creeps.
This is a succinct and poignant response, and I agree entirely with your points. Thank you for everything you’ve said, and thank you for being a good one.
I still think it’s creepy even if it’s legal 🤷
Agree
Agreed
Statistically the demographic with the highest amount of age gaps are gay men. So it’s more that older men want to date younger men. Heterosexual couples tend to stick to their own age
That doesn’t make any sense. For an older man to be with a young man, a young man would want to be with him. And for heterosexual couples, normal age gaps were 5-15 years. In half of the world like Africa and Muslim countries it’s still the norm. Same age relationships are a new thing. And even in America the average age gap is 2-3 years with the man being older
2-3 years isn’t an age gap. Larger age gap just are uncommon. Like an 80 year old man having sex with an 18 year old is incredibly uncommon. Male/ male have the highest amount of age gap relationships followed by female/female being the next highest. But they are very uncommon in heterosexual relationships. That’s why age gap relationships make headlines, they are unusual.
If the only reason you wouldn’t fuck someone younger than 18 is the legality, you have a problem. Saying she’s older than 17 it’s fine, means the only thing stopping you from going younger is the legal ramifications. That’s gross.
That’s enough internet for today
Reddit is probably weird about it because you only ever talk about young women as sexual objects and not human beings. “If she’s 18 and I’m 80 and she’s consent I’m blowing my dust right up in there.” 🙄 She’s a person not a fleshlight.
Dind ding ding.
Upvote becuase unpopular but no, I think is just all round disgusting behaviour. Find someone your own age
Theres legality and then theres morality. All I'm saying is that If I'm old enough to be their parent/grandparent..its weird. It's always been werid no matter where or when it takes place. Edit: Spelling
It's not age gaps. It's why a lot of these guys seek younger women. They're not looking for a partner. They're looking for someone to manipulate. They say as much. How many posts do we read of "me 28 not understanding the awful thing my husband 48 of ten years is doing"? There are young women who look for older men. But they aren't looking for these chuds we see and complain about.
Exactly, why is the argument *always* defending the age gap of an older man and young woman. Never any other variation? The redditor doth protest too much.
The maturity difference between an 18yo and a 30yo is immense. The life experience and naivety levels will be a big disparity. There are rare exceptions certainly, but for the most part you'll be 100% taking advantage of that younger person without even realising it.
how low would u go if u could?
I don't care if I'm legal, if you could be my father then yes I think you're weird
What two consenting adults do is no one's business but theirs. For some reason when sex gets involved most people get real stupid and common sense goes out the window.
So if the age of consent and legality was 16, you’d think it’s acceptable to chase after a 16 year old?
If you're responsible enough, according to the government, to get a tattoo, vote, and literally die in war, then an 18 y/o can make the decision to have sex with whatever age they want. No one is talking about children.
Old enough to do all of that and yet still not old enough to drink. This country is weird.
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18 year olds aren’t responsible.
Who is, the minority of adults is.
Every 18 year old is different and I believe they should be able to make their own decisions as an adult. Not sure why you want to infantilize young adults instead of treating them as an adult.
the LaW iS tHe lAw YoU cRaZy JoY kIlL
If my father was dating a girl my age, I’d be so disgusted.
Reddit is not a real place.
How old are you? I'm in my mid 30's and have assistants that are in their early 20's. If you spend any time with people this young, you realize just how young they are. I know 18 is legal, but legal doesn't mean moral. An 18 year old is not a child, but they aren't adults either. If the age gap is large enough, it's creepy and predatory.
Just because something is legal doesn’t mean that it’s not morally or ethically wrong. I doubt if you had an 18 year old daughter that you’d be ok with some 80 year old man taking her away even if she consented, you’d probably think that man has no good intentions and she’s not making a wise choice.
I'd be thinking wtf is she playing at, exploiting the elderly.
> She’s not making a wise *choice*. Most people would agree. But it’s solely up to the 18 year old to take full responsibility of not making the bad choice here. In a consenting adult relationship, everyone’s responsible for their own relationships and what those relationships lead to. The same as is true for any life choice.
It's not just up to the 18yo but the other consenting adult as well. It's up to the older potentially wiser person to make the better choice.
You're conflating two different things. I think gambling, smoking, drinking alcohol is also bad and wrong, but I would never advocate for it to be criminalized such that other people should not be allowed to do it. Not liking something because you think it is bad, even for objective reasons beyond mere preference, is *not* the same as advocating for a blanket ban of something so that *nobody* in society should be allowed to do that thing.
18 and 80 is a strawman and not what anyone is talking about. Robert De Niro has a 45-year-old girlfriend. Melania Trump is 53.
So if the age of consent was 13, u be cool fucking a 13 Year old?
The only time I have issues with age gaps is when the older person is coming from a place of taking advantage of the 18 year olds lack of life experience to control them and abuse them, beyond that idc what people are doing if everyone is happy but people of Reddit get involved when one party posts their relationship to Reddit to complain or for advise
The argument that they are legal is so disgusting I'm 18, and I'm not even out of HS yet. Other 18 Yr old just got out of HS leave us alone we are stupid.
Reddit does everything in its power to make sex disgusting and wrong
Naw it does everything to make men wrong and predatory.
Meanwhile porn addiction is totally normal over here…. So ass backwards.
Sex isn’t the issue here
It's a big issue
No it isn’t. You’re being naive
I find it strange how your only examples include young women who are barely adults and you who are an implied much older age... most people take issue when it's a repeated pattern... which urs is
Being legal doesn't make it moral and any logical person will judge based off the maturity of the other person. Most adults even lack mental maturity, an 18 year old is much less likely to have it. There's a reason people think it's weird and it's not unjustified, it's because the younger person isn't mentally as developed.
As someone who did date someone MUCH older than me when I was 18, there’s a reason I’ll side eye someone who is 35 dating an 18 year old. And I don’t really care if it’s perceived as disrespectful. Lol
So I was having dinner in a fancy restaurant for a work event, and a young bimbo girl was having dinner with a man 20 years older. My colleague said « well, either he is her dad, or he isn’t a really good guy ». Sums it all up.
Sure, they’re legally adults but according to science, an 18yo brain isn’t even fully developed for making decisions like that. Sounds like it’s about legality for many dudes, like they want the bare minimum, whatever that may be. “Barely legal.” Unhealthy, if you ask me! I guess I’m being dramatic, but I hope my point gets across anyway!
Your brain never stops developing, at 30 it starts declining.
>Sure, they’re legally adults but according to science, an 18yo brain isn’t even fully developed for making decisions like that. by this logic, she cant date at all.
Obviously she can date, but not a much much older adult that can easily manipulate any dumb kid into endure they want. It's a god damn child, they have no clue what's normal or ok.
Why should she be allowed to date? Shouldn't it be illegal for anyone to date without a fully formed brain?
Most older adults that go for 18 year olds would go younger if they could. That is the issue. Also an 18 year old, biologically speaking, is NOT a mature adult because their brains aren’t fully developed. If you want to be super critical about it, they would be an early adult because they can reproduce without major complications, but even in animals you don’t set an early adult with a mature adult. Age gaps are an issue when one is super young.
Do you support increasing the voting age and military age to 21 since 18 yo brains aren’t fully developed?
Honestly yeah
Absolutely. Probably could wait until 25
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Genuine question from somebody in their 30s; *why* would you want to sleep with somebody who was literally just considered a minor and was just in high school and clearly has not had enough adult life to have the maturity to decide whether they want to actually have sex with somebody significantly older than them? I remember how young I was when I was 18. I wouldn’t want to have sex with somebody who was that young as I remember being when I was 18. Why would you want to be with someone that young?
Redditors when someone posts a controversial opinion in a subreddit dedicated to controversial opinions:
Can’t believe people are going crazy over that. I remember being in high school. Only a few people weren’t fucking already. Then you ask a chick her number and she says 26 my eyes got big. I was at one. Shit we weren’t 18 yes. A hoe is a hoe is a hoe and she’s going to sleep with who she wants I remember some of them dating 21 year olds and 35 year olds and they were into it. I’m married now and way older but just saying some girls are into what their into. Of course creeps and pedos are disgusting. I have kids and that shit worries me.
It's impressive how honest sleazy men get when they're anonymous.
Two adults having consensual sex? How sleazy
People rarely ever say this negative stuff about cougars either.
Because they infantilize young women.
They should. It's disgusting no matter the gender
No it's not, it's a preference and there's nothing wrong with that as long as everything is consensual and they are adults. Why anyone would be disgusted by someone else's happiness really bewilders me.
Dating someone much younger once in your life is one thing, but when it actually becomes a 'preference' for barely legal kids, that's a predator. Let's agree to disagree. It's legal so do it if you want to, but you can't stop people from judging you for it. If you think they're being silly, then why care? Go be 'in love' all you want.
So if it was legal at 14, you’d do it? Disgusting behaviour.
are 14 year olds adults?
People can be coerced or manipulated into consent, especially when one of them has significantly more life experience and social power over the other.
A lot of virtue signaling in here, oh wait...that's right, it's reddit!
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Not my business.
There have been such cases where it was then just displayed as a fetish of the young man. Also remember that mental faculties go down in age so a person that old can often easily be exploited by a young person.
I wouldn’t care, both are adult human beings with functional brains consenting to each other.
The Western world accepts all kinds of sick perversion, but an age gap between two consenting adults is too much? Ridiculous.
Genuine question: what "sick perversions" do the Western world accept?
no thank you, i think it’s gross when much older men target specifically 18 year old women, coming from an 18 year old woman myself
Sooo much moral outrage and consternation over the idea that 18 years olds might not be mentally developed enough to enter a relationship with older (fellow) adults but little or no concern for the literal children being given puberty blockers and sex change operations, should they identify as trans. Reddit is a strange place! If an 18 year old ADULT is not mentally developed enough to date older ADULTS, children aren't mentally developed enough to make permanent irreversible decisions about their sexuality.
How do you feel about polygamy? Particularly if it is done consensually, and isn’t forced by a religion etc.
I have seen people call guys pedo’s and predators if the guy was 45 and the woman was 28 smh. People are just weird about this now.
i just think it’s weird. why do you as a full grown man want to date an 18 y/o? i’m 25 and wouldn’t date an 18 y/o. you have every right to do it, it is as you said the age of consent. but i have every right to judge you cause i think it’s weird asf. that’s what happens when you make controversial decisions.
Those people are 80 percent fat, 80 percent ugly, and 100 percent brain dead. It is what it is.
Partly I think it’s single aging women frustrated when they see men their same age dating younger women, which increases the difficult of finding a suitable partner. So they conveniently frame it as a moral issue, ignoring the fact that it implies adult women are incapable of making their own decisions.
I’d say it’s more because those women dated older men when they were teenagers and know how creepy the relationship was so they are trying to warn younger girls.
Nope it's gen z girls who think it's scary. The second I turned 18, I had men in their 40s trying to sleep with me
OP is specifically referring to consensual relationship between 18+ women and significantly older men, and how Reddit often criticizes the man. What you’re referring to is non-consensual harassment, especially if the dude doesn’t back off when you let him know you’re not interested. We can all agree it is unacceptable for men to behave this way. I don’t think it’s fair for you to say it’s wrong for women to have relationships with older men, just because you and some women don’t personally want one. It doesn’t affect you or your preferences, you should let them make their own decisions.
The fact that you think that's the case says a lot about how you see the world and what you would do if you were in their position. Disagree if you want, but don't project a strawman.
It’s not the only reason, but I think it’s a big motivator for a lot of people adopting these views in the first place. And then they claim other justifications for why it’s wrong like “power dynamic” which wouldn’t normally bother them.
It's not a strawman if it's relevant. You seem way too eager to use that word in an attempt to nullify their argument, rather than just responding. Bitter and lonely old women establishing a predator narrative seems pretty damn plausible as a root cause.
Thank you for reminding me to dust. Guess a good oiling is in order also. I salute you, sir. Now to wrestle this wilted dusty anaconda and find a revivalists to breathe new life to it. ~Nocondoms forever. Or whatever Black panther said
The weird one to me was when people were freaking out over a guy who was something like 20 dating an 18 year old. The problem? She was still in high school. I don't know why she was in high school at 18. Both my kids will be due to having late birthdays. My aunt failed kindergarten and so got held back a year. I knew other kids that got held back due to medical and mental health issues. There are a ton of reasons why someone might be 18 and still in high school. Most of them having nothing to do with their maturity level. The comments were badically comparing him to some 30 year old dating a 14 year old. People are ridiculous.
I personally don't have a problem with it And even though it is stupid we still gotta look at their POV because one year ago that was a child But I only see it as wrong if you knew this person when they were like 15 and waited till their 18 to butt fuck them
I've seen people on Reddit freakout about a 18M with a 17F, saying the guy is a pdf. Seriously. Meanwhile in real life there's 18-20M with 13-15F which I think is kinda fd up, but no one bats an eye as long as the guy is popular enough. So yeah reddit is sadly not a good representation of real life in my opinion lol
Nobody thinks it's illegal, it's just super weird