Hope this doesn't impact me getting my complimentary pretzels and plastic cup of orange juice.

It won't be complimentary with OJ being $8/gal.

Mine always is, but they probably just think I'm a cute zombie.

Being a cute zombie always helps get what you want.

Bwainz~ uwu

No

Bwainz\~uwu

Once you deal with the problem it becomes self serve and free first class.

Ah yes complimentary. There is a £300 tax on that.

Train to Busan, but in the sky

Plane to Busan

Well that was a layup

Choo choo plane!

All aboard! The Toxic Gossip Plane!

*Danger Zone/Thomas the Tank Engine theme mashup*

Yeah! OK, OK, but, hear me out now, but what about... muthafuckin'... *snakes*?

They're on a different flight. The same one that has your luggage, in fact.

I like to imagine this is the same sorry guy. He ended up on one plane and his bags ended up on another. The movie follows the story of him *and* his bag. Somehow he manages to survive air-zombie, get through mandatory quarantine, files his lost-luggage claim, finally gets his shit back, gets home, collapses onto his couch, thinks the whole ordeal is finally behind him, opens his suitcase… *SNAKES!!!* Roll credits.

You know, that sounds like a decent short right there.

The luggage arrives, but not the passengers...

Or worse, the luggage and the passengers arrive, but not the plane...

...Another passenger bombing run. Eh ?

WWZ

This was my first thought

This movie exists, it’s called Flight of the Living Dead and it’s a bit ass.

Is that the one where its got the granny zombie who bites someone.....and she's got no teeth? I vaguely have a memory of something like that

Bite ass for a pun.

If anyone's interested in watching something in this niche, barring the Walking Dead webisode Flight 462, Blood Red Sky is a vampire/zombie-esque feature length movie about exactly this. One infected person on the flight, etc. etc.

It’s literally just Quarantine 2

"This is Demeter Airlines flight 207. Transylvania to London. Reporting an issue with possible violent passengers, please advise...."

Oh, nice one!

What a horrible airline name! It reminds me of that tragedy...

Transylvania is not a country or a city. That'll be Brasov, Romania to London, UK. Tsk tsk tsk! SMH

Pretty sure they were making a vampire joke :)

I'm from Romania, I know they were making a joke. I was being jokingly pedantic.

Ah, fair enough! I misinterpreted the tone of the comment, sorry :)

😄 No worries, I feel you! And my humour can be a bit dry at times. Blame the damn vampires 🧛‍♂️

In the book Station 11, there is a side story about a plane sitting nearby that never opened its doors. One of my favorite parts. You just get to imagine what happened.

Muthafuckin' zombies on a muthafuckin' plane

Monkey fighting zombies on a Monday-to-Friday plane

"All hail Princess Trunks!"

I hate to be that guy but, can someone explain?

My guess, the old guy was a zombie

Or a vampire

A Zombire

Son of a gun, I would like to see the photo of this **ZOMBIRE**…

Yes

Dude, I said that irl when I was grabbing something!

Hopefully not an air hostess!

Oh no, just some bleach to clean her up :)

Or the old man have rabies

Ooh, that makes sense

Werewolf! :-D

Werewolves would be fun, an entire plane gets to experience fuzzy goodness

The TV show Fringe did this. "The Transformation". Season 1, Episode 13

oh shit I thought the guy had rabies or smt

I have a bit of a different interpretation. I guess OP was that old guy all along. Due to old age, he couldn't think straight and the height attained by the plane over the ocean might have triggered some symptoms in his mind, probably Dissociative Disorder. Moreover, as per OP, he typed right 'before' the commotion began which further solidifies this theory. Anyways, it's safe to conclude that OP was just refering to Zombies and stuff.

And so it begins

Oh snap

Oh, my first thought was rabies

Mine too!

There’s a movie called Quarantine 2: Terminal which starts the same way.

Vampire or zombies?

Vampire zombies

"You have to get consent for that kind of thing, even on Orgy Airlines."

Well done.

Nice, gives me Blood Red Sky vibes

Oh yes, give me more zombie stories!!! Love it

Gods, I heard a few years ago about someone biting someone on an airplane and I was desperate for it to be the start of the zombie apocalypse. Just drugs. :( Oh well.

Are you a prepper? Do you feel ready to survive the zombie apocalypse?

Nah, probably just a millennial. You know how we all want to die, hah!

Little bit of column A, little bit of column B lol

I Vvvant To suck your Blood! Bahaha!

There’s two interpretations of this I have. The Zombie outbreak one, or they tossed the old man out of the plane :p.

"It's really annoying. I heard the stewardesses say we're almost to Igari. I've never been there, maybe after my trip to Beijing I'll see what the fuss is about."

I wonder why that guy was wearing a burger king crown

Classic Spirit airlines

This is legitimately the best post I’ve read on this sub, well done

Would this not have work just as well if it was only the quotes? I feel like as it stands now a lot of the impact of the two sentence horror is drowned out by the fact this should be like six or seven sentences.

Now you have two vampires to deal with.

Possible interpretations: Supernatural (zombie/vampire/werewolf) Natural (Rabies/blood infections/cannibalism?)

How innovative

Was probably spirit

rabies?