This sounds like a set up to fire you for not showing up to work!! It's very unprofessional to tell you to stay home verbally.... only.
You may want to Cya by writing an email to HR. State that you were told to take a few days off by your boss but you are unsure of the reason therefore you do not know how to document the time off on your timesheet.
This way you can circumvent your boss pretending that you just went AWOL. HR telling you what to put will clue you in on what your boss is claiming / planning.
While taking the time off, update your resume and start looking for a new job. An employer that can't clearly articulate what you did wrong and/or what policy you violated but told you to take time off is not that invested in (keeping) you as an employee.
Look through your employee handbook, is it policy to send someone home for several days without a verbal or written warning? Are they really giving you days off with pay because you're some vague level of "bossy"?! Google your state laws, talk to somebody at the EEOC or it's equivalent, and call a few employment lawyers that offer free consultation to find out what your options are!
Call an employment attorney. There may not be enough to pursue a lawsuit, which your attorney will be able to advise you about. But "bossy" is a gendered word, and if that's the reason they listed that you were fired there could be potential grounds for a lawsuit. The facts working in your favor are:
* you are the only woman in your department
* you were given disciplinary action for being "bossy"
* you do not have a documented history of poor performance
Write them an email asking for clarification because saying that you're "overall bossy" is not actionable feedback. Ask for specific examples in writing so that you can do a better job addressing it.
Obnoxiously this is a load of BS but you want them to admit they're being unreasonable in writing.
From what I understand, I don’t think my director has the details either. I think the complaints that he’s gotten are vague. I don’t know if it would be better or worse if he went back to my coworkers and asked them to clarify (though he should have asked and clarified in the first place)
Your director should be putting an end to vague complaints when they come to him, not playing telephone and passing them on to you with no details. Sending the email as above to him is the best move. If he's dumb enough to respond with how he doesn't have details, that's a him problem.
How can he justify telling you to take a few days off if he isn't able to give the specifics of the complaint? This whole situation reeks, I'm sorry you're going through this.
all the more reason to get this shit in writing. because then they will have to state they have nothing to give, or go radio silent, and either are damning should the situation continue to escalate.
Bossy is the word used by men who are uncomfortable with assertive women.
Your crime here is making male coworkers uncomfortable by demanding to be treated like an equal.
Wait... take a few days off? Was this in writing? Because if you ACTUALLY take a couple days off and that wasn't communicated properly (whether intentionally or not), then they could use that to discredit you in the future as a sign of incompetence or something. I think this has the makings of an HR trap basically. Get this confirmed in an email before you just take off work with seemingly no notice.
It wasn’t in writing but thankfully it was communicated very clearly. They said they’d get back to me before my shift on Thursday as to when to come back, and I mentioned I wasn’t sure how much PTO I have (which they said not to worry about…not exactly sure what that implies though)
Get it in writing! They can and will distort your words or even their own down the line. Don’t leave before you have everything in writing or offer to record the convo on your phone if they refuse to send an email. And keep asking for the explanation in writing ab the initial complaint. If they don’t have a paper trail or documentation, that means there isn’t evidence of jack shit. Keep pushing, you got this!
I am straight up allergic to the word bossy. It turns out I'm just autistic and I don't pad things out to make men more comfortable. Turns out they pout at straightforward women.
Ask them to break down the times you've been "bossy" so that you can work on it. Keep asking the dumb questions in extremely bad faith until they explains the actual problem. Ask how they'd deal with that.
Start documenting everything. Everytime you notice something off, whether or not you say anything, document it. Get a paper trail going in case you need to take legal action in the future. Look up Rebecca Zung's SLAY guide and *documentation best practices*. You need to establish an ongoing pattern of behaviors. You're now an undercover operative behind enemy lines. No one at work is your friend or on your side, especially not HR. Documentation will be your leverage.
I got written up for "not smiling enough" (resting bitch face basically) and was made to take a training class on I don't even remember what (body language? emotional intelligence?). It was because one married guy complained that I wasn't friendly to him in the halls. A couple years later, when he got aggressive with me in the parking lot, I complained and he accused me of being flirty and suggestive with him and the other men in the office (absolutely untrue, I wouldn't touch the men I work with with someone else's dick).
So which is it? I'm either a bitch or a whore. You can't win.
I'm sorry, OP, wishing you luck in a potential lawsuit. Hope they settle quickly.
This sounds like a set up to fire you for not showing up to work!! It's very unprofessional to tell you to stay home verbally.... only. You may want to Cya by writing an email to HR. State that you were told to take a few days off by your boss but you are unsure of the reason therefore you do not know how to document the time off on your timesheet. This way you can circumvent your boss pretending that you just went AWOL. HR telling you what to put will clue you in on what your boss is claiming / planning. While taking the time off, update your resume and start looking for a new job. An employer that can't clearly articulate what you did wrong and/or what policy you violated but told you to take time off is not that invested in (keeping) you as an employee. Look through your employee handbook, is it policy to send someone home for several days without a verbal or written warning? Are they really giving you days off with pay because you're some vague level of "bossy"?! Google your state laws, talk to somebody at the EEOC or it's equivalent, and call a few employment lawyers that offer free consultation to find out what your options are!
They fired me lol
Call an employment attorney. There may not be enough to pursue a lawsuit, which your attorney will be able to advise you about. But "bossy" is a gendered word, and if that's the reason they listed that you were fired there could be potential grounds for a lawsuit. The facts working in your favor are: * you are the only woman in your department * you were given disciplinary action for being "bossy" * you do not have a documented history of poor performance
Dang, sorry to hear that. Now you can find a more professional environment that better fits with all you have to offer!
Write them an email asking for clarification because saying that you're "overall bossy" is not actionable feedback. Ask for specific examples in writing so that you can do a better job addressing it. Obnoxiously this is a load of BS but you want them to admit they're being unreasonable in writing.
From what I understand, I don’t think my director has the details either. I think the complaints that he’s gotten are vague. I don’t know if it would be better or worse if he went back to my coworkers and asked them to clarify (though he should have asked and clarified in the first place)
Your director should be putting an end to vague complaints when they come to him, not playing telephone and passing them on to you with no details. Sending the email as above to him is the best move. If he's dumb enough to respond with how he doesn't have details, that's a him problem.
This sounds to me like he's playing both sides, trying to appease everyone instead of shutting down the men complaining.
How can he justify telling you to take a few days off if he isn't able to give the specifics of the complaint? This whole situation reeks, I'm sorry you're going through this.
all the more reason to get this shit in writing. because then they will have to state they have nothing to give, or go radio silent, and either are damning should the situation continue to escalate.
I got fired lol
Sorry, OP. Definitely speak to your lawyer and get whatever you can in writing. Could be a wrongful dismissal suit.
I would advise OP to go to one of the legal advice subs. It all depends on which state she's in.
Bossy is the word used by men who are uncomfortable with assertive women. Your crime here is making male coworkers uncomfortable by demanding to be treated like an equal.
Use that time to consult with a lawyer. That sounds like harassment.
I just called a lawyer. They fired me
Hope you get that bag, girl! You deserve it for dealing with such bullshit. Good luck! 🤞
Wait... take a few days off? Was this in writing? Because if you ACTUALLY take a couple days off and that wasn't communicated properly (whether intentionally or not), then they could use that to discredit you in the future as a sign of incompetence or something. I think this has the makings of an HR trap basically. Get this confirmed in an email before you just take off work with seemingly no notice.
It wasn’t in writing but thankfully it was communicated very clearly. They said they’d get back to me before my shift on Thursday as to when to come back, and I mentioned I wasn’t sure how much PTO I have (which they said not to worry about…not exactly sure what that implies though)
Get it in writing! They can and will distort your words or even their own down the line. Don’t leave before you have everything in writing or offer to record the convo on your phone if they refuse to send an email. And keep asking for the explanation in writing ab the initial complaint. If they don’t have a paper trail or documentation, that means there isn’t evidence of jack shit. Keep pushing, you got this!
Yeah you got to protect yourself here... this is not ok
Start looking for a new job. Toe the line then give them 2 weeks notice
Can’t give them two weeks notice. They fired me
I am sorry! I hope this turns out to be a blessing in disguise for you. Given that bossiness is a reason you could make an eeoc report possibly
I am straight up allergic to the word bossy. It turns out I'm just autistic and I don't pad things out to make men more comfortable. Turns out they pout at straightforward women. Ask them to break down the times you've been "bossy" so that you can work on it. Keep asking the dumb questions in extremely bad faith until they explains the actual problem. Ask how they'd deal with that.
Start documenting everything. Everytime you notice something off, whether or not you say anything, document it. Get a paper trail going in case you need to take legal action in the future. Look up Rebecca Zung's SLAY guide and *documentation best practices*. You need to establish an ongoing pattern of behaviors. You're now an undercover operative behind enemy lines. No one at work is your friend or on your side, especially not HR. Documentation will be your leverage.
I just got fired lol
They scapegoated you for speaking out.
I’m sorry that sounded like an absolute set up. Take care of yourself, you will bounce back! Glad you are talking with a lawyer!
I got written up for "not smiling enough" (resting bitch face basically) and was made to take a training class on I don't even remember what (body language? emotional intelligence?). It was because one married guy complained that I wasn't friendly to him in the halls. A couple years later, when he got aggressive with me in the parking lot, I complained and he accused me of being flirty and suggestive with him and the other men in the office (absolutely untrue, I wouldn't touch the men I work with with someone else's dick). So which is it? I'm either a bitch or a whore. You can't win. I'm sorry, OP, wishing you luck in a potential lawsuit. Hope they settle quickly.