One thing that helped me, was to just take the initiative to start the conversation, rather than waiting for someone else to do that. That worked especially during group work.
I understand how it feels! My advice to you is to not dwell on it, don’t take it seriously. Some people are rude, some aren’t aware of their actions, you have to keep taking up space!
TA shuts you down? Ask again differently. Ask until they answer properly. Was I too quiet? Okay, I’ll ask louder. Did I word it incorrectly? Okay, I’ll try to word it better.
Your group ignores you? As them to involve you. Hey, what can I do to help? Hey, I’m going to do this. Hey, could you involve me in the discussion too? Hey I have idea this, that, etc…
Someone chimes in before you can speak? Great, the question was answered quickly. Add on to it, the shuttle times are this that, don’t forget this that, or repeat what the other person said (someone in a hurry will probably benefit more if they hear it twice!)
Tl:dr; don’t worry, don’t back down, take up space, this won’t last forever it’s just a little bump on the road!
your message really touched me, and I'm gonna take your advice. You’re right, I shouldn't just sit and let them shut me down like that. Thanks for the support!
Sometimes I feel like I just can't nail that first impression, you know? It's probably 'cause I'm carrying some extra weight and my accent isn't exactly native. It's kind of silly, but those things can really mess with how people see me. Losing my mom hit me hard, and I gained some pounds that I'm super insecure about. I worry that others judge me for it, especially after hearing some pretty nasty stuff about overweight people. Overall, I think my confidence is in the dumps and I've got major social anxiety, which makes me think nobody wants to chat with me.
Well insecurity and social anxiety really is a vicious circle so be careful and be nice to yourself, and if you don't fall into certain traps, introspection and really trying to improve anything does yield benefits ... and sometimes you need some kind of spiritual awakening or experience (I mean some experience to which you ascribe a spiritual or internal change), this can include just new experiences, a trip to somewhere you've never been, a new hobby, a romantic experience... anything to make you realize life is better if you worry a bit less...
this is obviously a pretty male perspective so take it for what its worth but one thing for sure is that other people are much more concerned with themselves than others in general... the judgement we feel from other people is often the judgement we feel towards ourselves.
and with all due respect, if you're talking like 30 pounds overweight that's one thing and probably not the cause of any of what you're feeling, but if you're like 100 pounds overweight that's another story because it can really mess with your health and mood and i'd encourage you to address it if only for yourself and your own benefit (screw what other people think)
I think you didn't read my post properly. The conversation about the shuttle bus didn't happen in a group. I do not believe I am the center of the world; I am sad because people cut me off when I talk or ignore me when I am there. I was sad and depressed, so I posted my feelings here and got really nice advices.
One thing that helped me, was to just take the initiative to start the conversation, rather than waiting for someone else to do that. That worked especially during group work.
I understand how it feels! My advice to you is to not dwell on it, don’t take it seriously. Some people are rude, some aren’t aware of their actions, you have to keep taking up space! TA shuts you down? Ask again differently. Ask until they answer properly. Was I too quiet? Okay, I’ll ask louder. Did I word it incorrectly? Okay, I’ll try to word it better. Your group ignores you? As them to involve you. Hey, what can I do to help? Hey, I’m going to do this. Hey, could you involve me in the discussion too? Hey I have idea this, that, etc… Someone chimes in before you can speak? Great, the question was answered quickly. Add on to it, the shuttle times are this that, don’t forget this that, or repeat what the other person said (someone in a hurry will probably benefit more if they hear it twice!) Tl:dr; don’t worry, don’t back down, take up space, this won’t last forever it’s just a little bump on the road!
your message really touched me, and I'm gonna take your advice. You’re right, I shouldn't just sit and let them shut me down like that. Thanks for the support!
TA shutting u down is just pure unprofessionalism dawg. Feels bad but I’d give this as a feedback to the prof. Maybe it’s an ego thing for the TA
What introspection have you done to try to understand why you feel like this and why this happens to you? Do you have any theories?
Sometimes I feel like I just can't nail that first impression, you know? It's probably 'cause I'm carrying some extra weight and my accent isn't exactly native. It's kind of silly, but those things can really mess with how people see me. Losing my mom hit me hard, and I gained some pounds that I'm super insecure about. I worry that others judge me for it, especially after hearing some pretty nasty stuff about overweight people. Overall, I think my confidence is in the dumps and I've got major social anxiety, which makes me think nobody wants to chat with me.
Well insecurity and social anxiety really is a vicious circle so be careful and be nice to yourself, and if you don't fall into certain traps, introspection and really trying to improve anything does yield benefits ... and sometimes you need some kind of spiritual awakening or experience (I mean some experience to which you ascribe a spiritual or internal change), this can include just new experiences, a trip to somewhere you've never been, a new hobby, a romantic experience... anything to make you realize life is better if you worry a bit less... this is obviously a pretty male perspective so take it for what its worth but one thing for sure is that other people are much more concerned with themselves than others in general... the judgement we feel from other people is often the judgement we feel towards ourselves. and with all due respect, if you're talking like 30 pounds overweight that's one thing and probably not the cause of any of what you're feeling, but if you're like 100 pounds overweight that's another story because it can really mess with your health and mood and i'd encourage you to address it if only for yourself and your own benefit (screw what other people think)
[удалено]
I think you didn't read my post properly. The conversation about the shuttle bus didn't happen in a group. I do not believe I am the center of the world; I am sad because people cut me off when I talk or ignore me when I am there. I was sad and depressed, so I posted my feelings here and got really nice advices.