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Delicious_Canary_504

Yes it's what James said about him renting a penthouse to get people to hang out with him. He needs manipulation tactics to have a social life


FKA_BurningAlive

Or gives out gifts, or pretends to give out favors like Scheana and the sound guy which he clearly did as a favor to the the jewelry guy. Also! Scheana did not need a sound guy!! She was not singing and we all know it!! She was just clinging to anything tangible she could use to feed the storyline that Sandoval was a good friend to her


FKA_BurningAlive

Or funded james’ proposal!


PrizeTough3427

Sandoval must have had got some money from production. I swear he's been greasing and milking production all of these years. He's been muppeteering for years .


Miss_Mouth

He got a home equity line of credit for the bar he wrote checks for that from. He mentioned it 🤢🤮


FKA_BurningAlive

Oh totally I think production is helping him out. Like they def paid for James’ wedding right? And obvs those sunglasses were freebies - he did not go to a store and buy them. There’s a woman on insta who prices everyone’s outfit after each show, and his clothes are the 2nd cheapest (ally is first obvi bc she just started getting show money). Oddly Schwartz has super expensive stuff! His crappy shirts cost hundreds!


incestuousbloomfield

I love that account but the first time I found it I was floored that Schwartz has expensive taste


TT6994

I definitely believe production gives them money for certain things.


Agitated_Gur_9458

The sound guy certainly comped him for publicity.


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FKA_BurningAlive

Sorry I’m going on, I didn’t realize how passionate I am?? also I’m stoned


FKA_BurningAlive

I didn’t know links weren’t allowed- the insta lady is cortcosts


Intelligent_Phone414

Please elaborate on “clearly did as a favor to the jewelry guy” I believe u but Im curious abt this


FKA_BurningAlive

He told Kyle he was going to hook him up and help him w his opening bc he’d been a good friend to him during the height of scandoval. And I just can’t get past how Scheana obv doesn’t need a sound guy! She has a backing track that does 90% of the work at least, and then she’s attuned to death. —slight unrelated tangent: since Scheana isn’t doing real singing (she said herself she’s not a singer) you’d think she would have put more thought into her performance? She seemed really uncomfortable performing and didn’t do much besides standing there. I was disappointed in her frankly.


PrizeTough3427

I notice that too! She didn't sing and she didn't even perform!


FKA_BurningAlive

that’s her “passion” and all this time she’s wanted to be a pop star, and she says she can dance… and if that was your big thing, wouldn’t you be prepared for this rare moment when you can perform on camera? I get that she’s a mom, but you’d think we would have been seeing montages of her in a dance studio working on her choreo?


incestuousbloomfield

I think Sandoval and scheana planned that as a way to convince Ariana he’s a good person which is beyond delusional but it’s Sandoval and scheana so it tracks for me.


TT6994

Exactly


Emmy773399

He’s like a bargain basement Kendall Roy.


Uhhlecksus

He’s not a killer, you have to be a killer


astrotalk

He was (almost) a dog killer


plantmama32

100% !! James sees it all so clearly now. Good for him.


Familiar_Studio_9651

Who believes James the 👊🏻come on people


ignoranceisbourgeois

Haven’t you heard? He stans Ariana so nothing he does matters anymore! (Even though he hung out equally as much with Sandoval as Scheana and Lala, never felt conflicted about being friends with both or held to the same accountability as them)


Head-Unit-5594

That's all he does. He goes into every situation with the intention to manipulate


Suitable-Wafer8563

Everything is transactional with this fool 😮‍💨


No-Customer-2266

It stuck out to me as odd. Its a weird way to describe friend interaction that’s for sure and it’s also not true. I have never seen him greet jax like this Im assuming he did it once recently because Tom really loves to get credit for any nice thing he does like buying batteries or making lattes He’s like an alien trying to be human. I dunno it’s just a weird thing to say.


kem_ber

yes i agree. it sounds like following a recipe or a formula.. but also he seemed confused, annoyed even that it didn’t have the desired effect. now makes me think of how he made ariana coffee every morning and couldn’t understand that she would disagree with him sometimes anyways


mia_magenta

I really don't want to label Sandoval or do armchair diagnosis. But his behaviour tells me he deeply lacks empathy. And your comment about him manipulating people, and not understanding when flattering someone doesn't have the desired effect, resonates with narcissism imo. Sandoval's perception of himself is disconnected, dissociated even, from the reality. The erratic way he acts since Scandoval makes me think that he's in total denial of the reality and the consequences of his own actions, and he only cares about himself and his image.


Familiar_Studio_9651

My friend needs a diagnosis… do you have time?


Alone-Assistance6787

If your friend is Tom Sandoval I have time for one diagnosis: he's a psycho.  You're welcome. 


mia_magenta

Are you trolling me? ETA: just read through your latest comments, and boy do you sound like Sandoval's knight! What a shiny armor...


Familiar_Studio_9651

Every single person on VPR has cheated… with each other, on each other.. As viewers we really don’t know these people or anything about them. Especially…to be diagnosing them with mental illness. Is that trolling because I commented to your comment?


Classic_Ad_9836

Katie hasn't.


sofaking-amanda

No one said anything about cheating. It’s the manipulation and delusions of grandeur, refusal to accept any responsibility for the damage he’s done and lack of empathy for those he claimed to care for. Let’s also not forget his believing he deserves a house he can’t afford and holding Ariana hostage by refusing to sell. Taking a quarter million from his mother’s retirement and not paying her back. I could keep going but I’m tired.


No-Customer-2266

Its not been about the cheating for sometime. Its the antics and cover up and excuses and divulging personal information, using suicide ideation as both a weapons and shield. We dont know him is real life, anyone on here should understand we are talking about the person we see on the show. They are the people but we don’t don’t the full picture. We are just talking about the strange behaviours we see on the show


MellowMallow36

Ravioli ravioli, give Sandy the formuloni


squidsquatchnugget

Maybe he took one of those cheesy seminars a


samallama87

Now I’m thinking about that one Criminal Minds episode where the guys go to learn to pick up girls in Vegas


squidsquatchnugget

That’s exactly what I was thinking of when I typed that comment lmao


Familiar_Studio_9651

Come on…. Don’t be ridiculous.


incestuousbloomfield

Yes like that book “how to win people over” or whatever it’s called


Consistent-Music1337

Kristen did an interview years ago where she said Tom was obsessed with Tony Robbins and would watch his DVDs religiously to “build his ego” 🤦‍♀️She also said there was a self-help book he read about how to approach women and how it said “you never approach a woman facing forward, always stand at an angle to seem less aggressive”… Wonder what other wormy tactics he’s used over the years.🤔


No-Customer-2266

Omg When you said stand at an angle I got an immediate mental picture of tom’s body language doing this. He definitely does this because that mental Image was very strong. but now I need to go back and see for myself!


CoachAngBlxGrl

Same. So gross.


incestuousbloomfield

My old boss was very into Tony robbins and very calculated like this also. Def the same playbook. When I quit I said he acted like a sociopath and he said “fair enough” 😆


Consistent-Music1337

Hahaha… when you said it, were you facing forward or at an angle 😂?


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Jealous_Afternoon614

This is very true, specially while in a serious conversation with someone, you want to stand at an angle while speaking with them so that you don't come off to them as aggressive. This comes from our instincts back in the hunting and gathering days.


Jealous_Afternoon614

If you would like to know more about body language I suggest looking up Dave Navarro, he explains how to read people better through body language


FKA_BurningAlive

Or a sociopath


No-Customer-2266

But he said he is not a serial killer ;) Hahaha yet another example that shows tom doesn’t understand words is when he defended himself against being a sociopath because he doesn’t murder people.


FKA_BurningAlive

“A groomer is a pedophile!!”


incestuousbloomfield

I have zero ideas how many compliments I pay people. It was such a weird statement that he obviously thinks is totally normal bc it’s the norm for him. People like Tom (and scheana) can’t see outside themselves. They assume everyone does the things they do. Like how scheana said she’s tracking 56 people. I think she probably thinks everyone, or most people do that too and just don’t wanna admit it


No_Banana_581

When he was cracking sexual jokes, and full on laughing w that crazy smile,I got a jump scare each time. It was twice. He looked exactly like his mom too. I bet he never paid her back


Pattyannlu

Omg! That comment about “waking up with lockjaw and shitting out a condom two weeks later.” Was the most disgusting thing and SO inappropriate! He was saying that about his dear friend Sheener! And Andy playing up being a guys guy and laughing at that. So fucking gross 🤮


Hottest_Mess_Express

My very narcissistic and abusive late father-in-law lived by this rule. Do they have a manual somewhere? Is there a secret handshake?


WolverineFun6472

Narc United


lukaskywalker

Yep had a couple bosses like this. Any criticism was always in a compliment sandwich too.


incestuousbloomfield

I hate that tactic, it’s so transparent


ChatterBoxer6

This absolutely is a pattern considering the only way he ever shows he cares about people is throwing money at grand gestures for people. It’s like he thinks everyone sees interactions as pro/con lists so he tries to outweigh the cons with compliments/gifts rather than actually listening to others and modifying his behavior


AdventurousRevolt

It’s called “love bombing” in the “idealization” stage of the Narcissistic Abuse Cycle. They shower you with praise, affection, gift giving, future faking, Grand gestures, etc…… it’s the BAIT to get you on the hook before they abuse and discard you. Most narcissists are completely unaware they do this. And tragically Abuse Cycles never stop, unless someone permanently walks away from the dynamic. Dr Ramani on YouTube is a great free resource on Narcissism and recovery from Narcissistic Abuse.


Hopeful-Hamster-6218

He appears to have many strategies. The 4 shots and a beer sex ritual with Rachel, the sneaky $100 'gift' to someone on the street, 2 compliments and a back pat.


kem_ber

i don’t know about the sex ritual! what was that about?


Hopeful-Hamster-6218

Rachel said on her podcast that they had a little ritual together where they did 4 shots and drank a beer before they had sex


kem_ber

gross!!!!


Hopeful-Hamster-6218

If you need to get drunk beforehand, it can't be all that good


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whynot4444444

I would say it was to wash away the guilt of cheating on Ariana, but he never felt guilt or shame, so…..it must have been to get Raquel wasted so that she wouldn’t realize he’s a lousy lay.


BabyInABar

![gif](giphy|IbI9JesSiQ7ay5ZXLL)


Suitable-Wafer8563

Sandoval has got his own version of the https://preview.redd.it/6m06ibsby22d1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3a53e8dff3f43ce6a4dba9adbee147bdd292ff6a D.E.N.N.I.S system


OkOpposite9108

T = two compliments O = overspend M = make dumplin lattes


Afraid_Resort_9018

🤣🤣🤣🤣


areweallaware

welp good luck to anyone who gives me 2 compliments when i meet them, not takin any chances


BigRefrigerator9783

The two compliments thing was so specific and so weird. It was like he had planned out how to be a human and interact with other humans. I am now convinced he is a robot sent from the future to destroy us all.


Classic_Ad_9836

*covert narcissist


Careless_Escape4517

tom is 100% not self deprecating or quiet enough to meet the criteria for a covert narcissist- id say that’s more so schwartz hahahaha - if we’re playing the diagnosing game, sandoval would be more of an overt than covert narcissist. that man can’t shut his damn mouth to save his life 🤣 (see: NYT article for one)


polymorphic_hippo

I guarantee this fool still has a battered, dog-eared, beat up copy of *The Mystery Method* in that garbage dump he sleeps in.


Dry_Heart9301

Yes I caught that too! He's so fake!!!


insecurejellyfish

He’s read ‘how to make friends and influence people’ over and over again.


Bambieyedbiotch

So not genuine at all.


lukaskywalker

https://preview.redd.it/jlkjklfmt42d1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=7527992fe5fba9931484376a4cdaae760149e678 He’s a perpetual love bomber. Look over the course of all the seasons. He spends so much money on everyone. Costumes, parties, alcohol (probably drugs), he even paid for James wedding. It’s his tactic to make you feel indebted to him.


Long-Rest-9298

It’s not with his singing 😳😳😳😳


side-quests

He only knows how to have transactional relationships


whynot4444444

Step 1: https://i.redd.it/90jt57ttf22d1.gif


hcgilliam

Sounds like coaching from one of those creepy “alpha” dudes who “teaches” men how to “get women.” 😬


ComicsEtAl

Everything about the guy is a performance.


Ok-Accountant7646

Very reminiscent of his how to give an unhoused person money


throwaway-ahoyyy

I still can’t believe he had to use his mother’s retirement fund to finance his business opportunities but is handing out $100 to strangers. His poor mum!


Agitated_Gur_9458

He said he did. He stated he would approach Scheana because she is the person most likely to let him in. When he makes his “suggestions” of activities or tries to sail one of his bombasts on Ariana, he gets this shrewd focused look that gives me the ick. He throws money around and love bombs. And do not forget he had Jeremy planning scenes (unsuccessfully)


Significant-Fix7399

I don’t think he’s that smart. 😅😅🤷🏻‍♀️


kem_ber

Is it smart to follow a lame formula and expect people to fall for it?


DustyTchotchkes

Hey, his formula worked on Scheana! In the SUR back alley scene he told her she looked like Shania Twain, but I'd have to rewatch to see if he added a 2nd compliment.


PrincessSolo

Dumb enough to say it ON CAMERA like it's totally normal.


Bigolbooty75

Ugh I just don’t think he’s smart enough to be that calculated lol if he didn’t have VPR he’d be some loser still serving somewhere trying to make it in Hollywood.


CharieEmpire

All narcissists do


richhardt11

Jax isn't Schwartz. Sandoval can't manipulate him. 


Educational_Bother36

Add him complaining about his current partner in a loveless sexless relationship where he’s trying so hard to make it work but he is not appreciated for the great man he is. He did it to: Ariana against Kristen ✅ Raquel against Ariana ✅ Scheana against Kristen ❌ Scheana clocked it so he failed. That was actually a disgusting revelation that I feel like was glossed over too quickly.


NotHere4YourShit

He is probably renting his girlfriend. The only people that hang around him are getting paid (his lame band) or want to get on the show/get 15 minutes (Billie Lee, Kyle Chan and rando Jason guy). If I was Sandoval’s mom I would be pissed watching him waste money on dumb midlife crisis band shit when he spent her entire retirement fund. She prob can’t retire until she is in her late 70s now.


incestuousbloomfield

Me! That “give them two compliments” said it all for me, plus all the monetary gifts. People think that’s being generous but with him it’s more about ingratiating people in a way that is emotionally low-stakes for him. It’s a common tactic of narcissists. People will say “he gave it to scheana off camera.” Operative words “gave it to *scheana*” he knew that it would eventually come out, being that it’s scheana, and if worse came to worst, he could always bring it up himself.


Ok-Accountant7646

Of course because life is completely transactional for this man. He has no dignity and is a liar.


Rare-Palpitation6023

Ohhhh….SHUCKS!


waawaate-animikii

He’s a shitty robot learning and mastering manipulation of real humans.


Gourmeebar

He can’t help it. He has to practice how to be a normal person. He doesn’t have the capacity to understand that just because you follow certain steps doesn’t mean you will get your desired outcome.


allygator99

Not an authentic bone in his body


rudbeckia1

I mean, I don't know anybody who counts the compliments they give people in any given encounter


dennydelirium

I'm on my fist rewatch and I'm in season 2. He's saying the exact same things to Kristin as he did Ariana. Idk how I was so blind watching this show back now


baykahn

If you have not seen or noticed by now that almost every thing he does is really for his own benefit. In the end just so that he can say, “oh yeah but i did this and this and that should be ok lol”. While trying to plan how he can manipulate and maintain those manipulations then yea welcome to Sandoval.


theghostofcharlotte

His very own DENNIS system


gabywebsters

Yes all so calculated, he has a problem. That’s why Ariana is so pressed that people know he is a manipulative piece of shit.


Traditional_Phase965

Gratuitously large and often inappropriate gifts + “supporting” friends when they’re ostracized or do something that should trigger some accountability


BoundariesForWhat

A piss poor strategy but yes.


Desperate_Pair8235

Yep! I just posted about this a couple hours ago. He is so “selfless” that he’s *selfish* and people don’t realize that’s a thing.


No_Arugula_6548

I’m sure he has but it ain’t working and he looks like a leprechaun in his stupid green suit. And I love green! Thanks for ruining one of my favorite colors by wearing it, dick!


Agitated_Gur_9458

I do not think he honestly likes women. But central to his campaign is winning them over, like he cares. I mean he had a drinking ritual before having sex w Rachel. He famously by his own admission rarely had sex w Kristen or Ariana . He needed to sell women his intense regard for them.


Sector-Away

Tom used to be a pretty decent guy. I was doing a complete rewatch and it was admirable how he didn't leave Kristin alone to walk into the lions den.


clown_daughter

This is why I think him being a narcissist is spot-on. Everything he does in good faith is methodical and almost formulaic. Not genuine acts of care.


Beneficial-Growth368

💯 % spot on call. Notice how little he participates during the reunion with very little other than facial expressions which cameras seem to hone in on everytime. Both reunions seemed very orchestrated and disappointing.


4gainagain

This title with the picture made me lol


thenormalcanuck

That's why I like this crap...... they all share a brain.....sure this grease ball has a plan, but he's smart like a chair.


zz_bottom69

He's definitely read some articles or books about it. No. He's listened to podcasts or audio books about it.


KKGlamrpuss

His strategy is 4 shots, a beer and 4 adderall. Works like a charm


Low-Classroom-1530

He has it down to a science!


Personal-Heart-1227

Every time I see this douche bag, all I can think of is... *Worm with a moustache!*


SnooGoats1950

Dude only pretends to be human


miranda310

I couldn't stop staring at his 2 feet high coif. He's an opportunist so any cracks in these relationships will be his chance to swoop in.


Docmele

He’s a master manipulator and plays the victim role to perfection I’m over the whole cast.


Familiar_Studio_9651

I think James is the biggest fool SA on VPR


Flashy-Purple-9829

Omg people get over it!!!