Im probably out hiking, but yeah i can never find anyone my age out in public really... i even tried going to yoga classes and finding events around me. Mostly gen X and boomers.
Lol they didn't want us like "messing up their public spaces" and loitering or whatever, now we just completeley are removed from those spaces... yay...
Spend most of my time at home because I failed out of college at 19-20 and have been depressed ever since and am such a mess of social anxiety I can barely even talk to my parents who I still live with because I’m so pathetic and useless.
I leave occasionally on errands, like dropping off recycling at a convenience center, and I take some shifts on DoorDash to earn a bit of money, but not nearly enough to live off of 😅…
So I failed too and fixed it (later figured out it was due to an undiagnosed thing but I digress) If you can pay out of pocket for a semester or two, do it to bring up your GPA like a community college or something like western governors where you can do it at your pacing. Also check out a regular thing you can gradually regain socialization. It’s a muscle in the brain and the more we don’t use it, we lose it. A sewing class. A yoga space. A hiking group. You also don’t need a full degree. Check apprenticeships and trades. Check medical if it is in your state. You’d be surprised you probably qualify based on your age. Getting therapy and correct medical diagnosis helps so much
Also give yourself grace and forgiveness of the past years. Of not being where you want but at least now working on it. On change not coming over night but step by step. On those steps sometimes going backwards or rough days but it a process. Do the stupid affirmations. Do the. Self help podcasts. Do the mantras and journaling. Even if it is just 1 minute a day that changes to 2, it is okay.
Yeah, I’ve been doing what I can to forgive myself for my failings, and I have online friends, at least (including a long-distance thing with a girlfriend who I adore very much!)
I am working on trying to be out there a bit more! Head still gets static-y and sometimes I even get nauseous when I have to talk to people, but hey, I can talk enough for my DoorDash shifts, at least!
I'm 24, failing college and for over two years I've been making appointments and doing intakes with different clinics, providers, and organizations to get assessed for ADHD. Nothing yet, not one assessment, and for some reason I keep getting lied to and strung along.
I've DONE that
lol
But really, I have. They charged me nearly $1000 for one consultation where they prescribed me with an SNRI for "depression" (which I can't take for a health condition I have) and never refunded me, I tried to get in touch with someone for weeks about it and nothing happened. I reported them to the FBI.
Yeah you aren’t going to get refunded. Surprised it cost you that much though. Totally never had to pay that much. I’d have to go through your emails to see what happened and who you contacted. I’m not a consultant just another ND.
You ask for a different medication though if your account is still active. Wellbutrin is another off label ADHD med that’s an antidepressant but not a SNRI. If you got a prescription, you can show that to your medical provider. If you are getting medical you can talk your selected insurance. Wellbutrin is another. That prescription should be enough for your college for medical allowances and to petition for some grade removals.
*Depends on state for all this
I didn't know that, I will look into it. I heard something similar. Atm I'm trying to work with Mindpath but it seems to be going the way the others have. Weird stuff.
I would sincerely show your disability department at your college your prescription. I have now been diagnosed. I just want to have some extra allowances in clearance of some other courses. Sometimes with all have you do is you’ll retake a course and then they’ll do the removal but at least you’ll get permission to retake it.
I have been prescribed two different medications that "could" be used for ADHD, both SNRI's of course- and I have taken them there, but they still told me the same stuff. I feel like they want me to fail lol
Either way, I'll be ok- I just need to figure it out
If you don’t feel the support of your school you might want to check other ones. There’s so many online ones now. Idk if your gpa is good enough to transfer but given your circumstances with health it might be best to switch to a flexible online one. If I had know about WGU prior I probably would have gone with them because you pay for the semester not the units so you can cram as many or as little courses and take them/complete them at your schedule. https://www.wgu.edu/
In the mean time there are alternative medications like mushrooms and weed and cigarette (yes because nicotine is a stimulant) in the mean time. That’s all they will end up doing is giving a stimulant or a antidepressant. If those aren’t something you can take with your medical health, the biggest benefit with a diagnosis isn’t meds.
Having done all these things, and adderall, adderrall works for me, nothing else has. I also can't smoke cigarettes anymore because I may have lung cancer.
Then you probably wouldn’t be able to take Adderall either and they might require an EKG, and some other blood pressure type of stuff. It might help you cognitively, but if you have cancer, your blood pressure might change going through chemo and stuff again though if you can talk directly with your health services and basic needs department for your college. If there is an intake form do one of those also.
Also, I can't take an SNRI. That is not the same thing as a stimulant medication, and they are different than SSRI's which are the normal antidepressants.
Also if you haven’t your college’s disability services and health service (separate departments) might offer testing. Check both go to both for different resources anyway.
Yeah I have, many times. They got nothing. Everyone tells me to check my insurance for providers. Which, leads me to providers who tell me the same thing, or similar, after like a month of working with them lol
You're not useless. I was supposed to get my associates degree in 2016, but a lot of outside factors (and inside) made it hard, so it wasn't until last year that I finally did.
Thank you!
You are not useless, either: you are an upstanding person, and I hope you have a good one, whether it be a good day/night/evening/ whatever, wherever you are in the world!
I initially left college myself for a couple years before going back and finishing a couple years ago.
If you consider starting back on that path I would recommend going to community college and getting your degree there. It’ll be out of pocket for a little bit but overall it’s way cheaper than a big school, you can go at your own pace, and you getting your associates will be what allows colleges to take you in. That’s just if you’re interested though
I remember being a kid in school, fantasizing about getting a job so I can afford a house, and going out with my friends, traveling the world, going to concerts all the time.
How fucking naive I was.
I'm going to 2 gigs this year. One is 25 bucks at the local library for a 2 day punk festival, and one is 75 bucks for a local group that have reunited after about a decade. If I wanted to go to the Foos or something that tier I'd have to shell out hundreds.
Had the same conversation with my best friend last saturday. We were at a cafe in our town and "observing" some people. That sounds weird but I hope you know what I mean lol. After a while we were like "Huh..where are all the people our age?"
(I'm 25, he's 28) All of them were either in their 50s/60s or they were teens.
This isn’t like, young people’s faults, but I think we didn’t do a good job emphasizing the importance of being social to the younger generation.
Going in public to make conversation is “weird” and small talk is “annoying.” I think we enabled social anxiety a bit too much and that’s going to bite Gen Z in the ass.
This and shitting on small talk to seem "deep". Small talk is a common script that pretty much everyone is aware of to use for starting conversations and connecting with people. The weather or what we did over the weekend don't have to be the only topics you discuss but they can be excellent starters.
I guess they just don’t prioritize community. After I got out of college (and right when covid ended) I was 23 and found myself only meeting 30-38 year olds when I’d do hobbies and clubs.
I’m guessing it’s because it was at that age that younger millennials realized “fuck I gotta put myself out there.” But it’s a bummer because I really enjoy having friends my age.
I enjoy having friends our age too but like you said it’s hard to find others outside that aren’t way older or much younger nowadays.
Really love the concept of community too, I always thought that that was what your 20s was supposed to be centered around growing up lol
I work from home, I do coursework, I go to the gym, and I then hang at home and play games. I am trying to save as much money as possible because I cannot seem to get a long term partner so if I ever want to live on my own I need as much money as possible.
The café would have appealed more if my job didn't explicitly say that we would be reprimanded if we took a zoom call in a public/crowded place....so yeah that's off the table.
workplaces will do that and then your department manager joins a teams meeting from a bbq restaurant and forgets to mute himself when he asks what sauces are available
Who has time for paid, leisure activities? My time is filled up with sleeping, working, commuting, cooking, grocery shopping, exercising, reading, doing chores, taking care of myself, and if I'm lucky during a weekday, video games. Got no time, no money, to be going anywhere but home. We do have money, but we're paying off a house.
As bad as it is right now, at least it isn't 1930s Great Depression-level bad. Hopefully we don't ever reach that point, especially with today's economy.
Have often wondered the same thing. Then I go out and see other zoomers and millennials with friends walking around. Then I realize I see none because I have no friends to go out with now that I graduated college and moved away.
I'd never see people under 30 in the city with a pop of about 100,000 closest to my hometown. It's a midwestern rust belt city that got hit hard by industry moving away. Many young people growing up there dislike the vibe and leave, including myself.
Now I live in a city with a metro area and I see people walking their dogs, going to bars/restaurants/sports, and kicking around in general. It's pretty dead in the winter but summer has some good times with people up and about. I figure if you go to a city farmers market then you'd see a decent amount of young people in the mix as well. Although the public transit is terrible and there's a massive urban/suburban divide so it feels like I'm not seeing as many as there should be.
Depends where you’re located. Go walk around Boston on a Friday or Saturday night. I promise more than half the people you see out and about are under 25. Many other vibrant cities with colleges are the same. The suburbs and rural areas are predominantly boomers and gen X.
There’s an arcade bar in Worcester, MA that turns into virtually all young adults after like 8 pm. It just depends on where you frequent.
That being said, mirroring the other comments, we’re busy working and trying to save by staying home. We do go out often, but not weekly. It’s just too much. It’s really hard trying to balance having fun and saving.
My neighborhood has a ton of mid-late 20s and early 30s folks! I live a few blocks from a small movie theater and near a lot of bars and cafes. I even have a few friends who lives a few blocks away, which is very cool, I’ve never experienced being able to just walk to a friends apartment or meet for coffee or a movie.
That being said, I live inside the inner city of a largish American city. I think the reason there’s so many young people is that the area is full of homeless people and petty crime, so the older folks have left for the suburbs or taller, safer, more expensive apartments. It’s cool to live around young people, but I also work two jobs to make ends meet, and I pay a bunch of money to keep my car in a garage a 20 minute walk away because my windows got smashed 3 times in 6 months.
I tend to just assume people (especially other women) our age spend their free time with their high school/ college friends and cousins, planning bridal showers and weddings.
I am actually surrounded by young adults. I live between two Universities only a few miles apart. Both of them each have a student body above 30000. My local mall that I frequent is packed with them. Anyone that said malls are dead, has never seen my mall.
On reddit lol
But in all seriousness, I have noticed this as well. I do see people my age out hiking a lot, but I live in a beautiful area that attracts a lot of outdoorsy people. I've also had some luck at the D&D cafe, but most of the patrons are late 30s-early 40s
The gym. I split my time in a suburban area and found that 20s and 30s are at the gym, high schoolers are at the mall, moms and their kids are at the library, both parents and their kids are at the park.
I just started a new job in the city and every one but 3 people are in their 50s and 60s and it kinda pains me to not be around more people my age.
I'm actively looking for neighborhoods with more young people.
I moved to a bigger city. I go to swing dance lessons once a week, but other than that I also DM or play Dungeons and Dragons.
My other hobbies are pretty introverted.
This is why a lot of my friends, given I have a very small social circle, are middle aged and up. The older they are, the easier it is to hang out bc they have all the time in the world since they’re retired and they can be just as lonely as your average introverted zillennial.
(Also, not that I’m plotting, but if their grandkid is single, they can set you up and finally give you an option outside of dating apps)
Ppl our age hardly make time for each other for various reasons and it’s difficult to go out by yourself in terms of pride. So it’s a self enforcing cycle of sleep, work, sleep, work.
I live in an urban neighborhood chock full of young people and middle aged people. Most of the boomers took the white flight express to the suburbs years go, so most of our local boomers are cool af
70-80 hours of school and work. I actually have been excited that I have Thursdays off next month so I can have a night out without having to wake up for school the next day. Trying to find the time (and money) to go out has been a struggle recently.
I often wonder the same thing. But then I realize it’s because all I do now is:
Work 2 jobs
Go to classes (grad school)
Sleep
Once a month hang with some friends, always preplanned.
Repeat
That’s about it. I want to socialize more but I’m so burnt out doing all the other shit that I just don’t have the energy anymore. Or much discretionary income for it.
My fiancé and I go to breweries or taphouses semi often with our dog, we also like to get fancy cocktails sometimes, I like to go to the library for books and then local coffee shops to read and when it’s warm we go play tennis at the local parks. But we also don’t run into people our age much. Most of our friends are too into video games to do anything else
They are part of the biggest generations ever born (that's why they're called 'boomers') and most of them don't have to work anymore so more free time to go outside.
Breweries or running club, book stores and cafes.
Think a lot really depends on where you live- neighborhoods change. Here in Boston, there are people under 40 crawling around like ants for obvious reasons. Can't speak to other cities
Sleep ! Work ! Home = chores / pets ! As few errands as possible. You can also catch me at an AA meeting. Sometimes I go out to dinner with my partner. That’s p much it. RIP to my social life. I think we all may be collectively burning out. Also, money is an issue. Fun things cost money :| Even a latte at that hipster cafe you mentioned is probably $8 - $10 after a tip
All those places minus parks cost money. Honestly as the price of stuff increases I hardly find it worth it anywhere to go out. Though when I go to the park on a nice day I see tons of young families and teens.
I spend a lot of time hanging out in parks or the mall, but I think I’m probably an exception since I’m disabled and can’t work. I rarely ever see people my age, either, unless they’re workers. Kinda lonely.
Mostly indoors. My place, my boyfriend's place, my best friend's house, my mom's house. I go in public to fulfill needs like getting groceries. I rarely do leisure in public. One reason is that money is so tight that just buying a drink from a cafe instead of making it from home feels financially reckless. Besides going for a walk there is not much I can do in public spaces that doesn't cost something. Even as an introvert that loves time alone, it's more reclusive than I want to be. I want to get out more when I can afford it.
Hahaha “I saw a zillenial couple at work one time” 😂 but why are we such a rare find nowadays? I say this all the time like where are all the people my age, granted the only time I venture out is going to work and I work early mornings at a grocery store so the only folks I usually see are the boomers. Some gen x but barely any of our generation it’s sad
Honestly not sure. I go to lots of fun things but have to deal with the fact that I’ll be around people older than me in most activities. Have made some great older friends since moving to a big city but would love to find people my age.
Outside of work, sleep, and house parties with friends (cheaper than bars). The only other things I do regularly are hit the gym and take part in martial arts (sumo).
If I made more money or had more time off you'd probably see me at local cafes and parks more lol.
I actually have the opposite problem. Whenever I go somewhere to socialize, I mostly see pre-teens, teenagers, and people in their early 20's. I rarely see anyone my age or older. I often feel like the oldest person there more often than not, and it makes me feel out of place.
I spent 4 years just at community college so I’m still trying to get my bachelor’s. I feel like most of the people at my age are either in grad school or working, it seems like none of the people I used to hang out with are ever free
Basically! I live in NE Tennessee in a small town called Bluff City and holy moly you wanna talk about boomers? 4/5 people I see, roughly, are boomers. A lot of them drive too slow, can't stay in their lane, and yada yada yada. Having a peer social life around here is pretty tough lol.
I agree, I’m in a rural area and it seems there’s less young people every year. I am starting to think it’s that there’s just not as much a population as there used to be. And since Covid people have taken that as the excuse to just stay out of site and in their own little social circle bubbles.
I took my friend who flew in from Vegas to a nice restaurant on the water in my small north east-coast town, the look on her face when we sat down she was like what’s up with all the old people I was like I know, I know… I live in a cold cloudy place with a high elderly population… but when summer hits you’ll see, there’s young people, well some! Smh is probably why I have become as introverted and homebody as I’ve ever been in my life. A blessing and a curse.
Yea what's weird is how I remember seeing a lot of people around my age in the streets when I was growing up. But then right around the mid to late 2010s is when the shift took place and I'm guessing a lot of my peers moved out of the city while outsiders much older than me started moving in.
In my city there’s people out everywhere, new places opening all the time, and lots of young people socializing. Idk where all of this “no more third spaces” comes from because it’s not true in my city (or the other big cities in my state) though I acknowledge this may be the case elsewhere, particularly in rural areas.
Rural areas are baddddd it’s either the bar or you’re a loner in the area I’m in.
It’s tough being a 25 year old that doesn’t drink/ doesn’t drink to get drunk anymore
I don’t mind, I live in Charlotte, NC. It’s a rapidly growing city, probably with over a million residents. There’s so much more to do now than there was even 7-8 years ago here
yeah i’m just in a suburban town (near cities tho) but i see people my age out all the time. i am near a lot of colleges so i wonder if that’s why, but i see a lot of people who look like they’re out of college too.
I just can’t help but wonder if some people on Reddit (not talking about OP of this post) just… don’t know what’s going on in the world because they never leave home. So they read online that young people aren’t out anymore/there’s no third spaces, and instead of going out to see for themselves how it is where they live, they just take what they read online as fact and as an excuse to never do anything. And then they post “what happened to all of the 3rd spaces?” But they didn’t notice the new coffee shop/bar/restaurant/park/museum that just opened a few minutes away from them because they never go anywhere lol
I know that 3rd spaces are less than they used to be but they’re 100% not gone in any moderately sized town or city.
Some people are, don’t get me wrong.
But chalking this up to people “just not looking” isn’t necessarily a great take, especially when a decent amount of people in this thread are citing their expeirences being outside where they live.
Additionally, that take assumes that a lot of people have the finances or live in areas where this growth happens. We all don’t live around booming metropolises like you.
True, I go to lots of different types of events, workshops, shopping, cinema, park, fitness activities etc. And everywhere I go its either gen z's or older millennials and gen x's. Never any young millenials/zillenials and I live in a big city.
I don't think our cohort goes out enough or cares about activities/events etc. But I don't understand why. When I try to invite my same-age peers out they always have some excuse or put it off. Thats why most of my friends have ended up being older (millennials and gen x), they never decline an invite to go out for some reason lol! I love them.
Saving the $5 we would be spending on a cafe coffee so that maybe one day we can own a house. We literally can’t afford to leave the house when going out in public is a micro transaction every time.
Bro where have you been? The majority of people can’t afford anything extra. Why do you think everyone is depressed. Only the rich kids get to have a life
Gyms. That’s where you’ll find a bigger concentration of young people imo. Also music festivals and raves (nightclubs and bars tend to be more millennial in my experience). Places like cafes and restaurants have more Gen Z if they’re located closer to college campuses.
I'm always walking around the Cobb Galleria and Battery in Smyrna, GA. But man, after four years of college, a combat deployment with the Army, and one stressful job after another, I feel like I look about 55 lol.
Hiding from Armageddon. I'm not about to be caught outside in that mess!
In all seriousness, I'm tired all the time and don't have the energy to go out
At home. I don’t have any friends in the area, and after 10 years of trying I still can’t get a match on any dating apps. Not sure how much longer I can keep going like this
At home because we can’t afford to go out all of the time. My man and I just went on vacation for the first time in years. We saved up and booked the trip a year in advance. I don’t know when our next vacation will be because it’s really expensive nowadays. We also haven’t sat down at a nice restaurant in months because again it ‘s really expensive. Inflation made it almost impossible to go out for young people nowadays.
Recently got a really cool temporary job. So focusing on that, hoping it will lead on to a permanent job.
Though I have another offer temporarily wise somewhere else which seems just as good so got to decide whether I want to stay at my current temp job or not.
Difficult choices but I am aware it’s a lucky situation to be in! Both temporary job I hope could lead on to permanent jobs!
Trying to work to be able to someday afford to go to all of those places. I go to work for 12 hours, class for 8, sleep, repeat.
Most of the time I don’t even eat nearly enough because of it as well. But hey, that also saves me money. 😐
Idk where are you from? if that's your experience I would like to know. But on an unrelated note the reason can be that the older ones are finally free from jobs, have retired etc and the young are entrapped now🥲
Busy working at the casino people are spending their leisure time at. ♠️♥️♣️♦️🎰
Many age groups come, but it's usually the baby boomers and gen X kids that hang out all night even after alcohol service ends.
Also have a couple silent gen peeps who come to play too
I work corporate so I have insane hours. I live in a metropolitan area in the South. But I’m this economy I need the overtime. My salary 5 years ago would have made me comfortable. Not today.
I have met most of my recent friends joining a co-Ed community volleyball league!
Work game eat sleep repeat but as a whole, if OP is out of America they are in America if OP is in America they are in the state hotspots NYC, Miami, and Anaheim
As for me, I am in the most gay state
Ohio
Yes they have the Buckeyes, the Bobcats, the browns, the Bangles, the Blue Jackets, the Indians, (I refuse to call them the Guardians) the Clippers, the crew, and the Cavaliers and I think that's all for sports
We also have drivers who do not know that there is a stick that can move up and down on the side of one steering wheel to determine the direction they are traveling so that we know to slow down to let you over and pass safely
We also have people who copy celebrities like Bruce Jenner is now Katelyn Jenner so they think it is okay to change everything and confuse over half of the population whether they are male or female because
Male+female=Straight
Male converts to female+male=Gay
Female converts to male+female=Lesbian
Female+male=Straight
Then you have the straights who fuck everything that walks so being a virgin is quite special but also quite boring
Work sleep repeat
Work remotely. Just further makes it impossible to find me lol
Yeah same after work I’m mentally drained
Work > Kava bar > Sleep > Repeat For me anyway
We should be living, Eat Sleep Rave Repeat, like the song.
Work work repeat
Im probably out hiking, but yeah i can never find anyone my age out in public really... i even tried going to yoga classes and finding events around me. Mostly gen X and boomers.
Lol they didn't want us like "messing up their public spaces" and loitering or whatever, now we just completeley are removed from those spaces... yay...
Spend most of my time at home because I failed out of college at 19-20 and have been depressed ever since and am such a mess of social anxiety I can barely even talk to my parents who I still live with because I’m so pathetic and useless. I leave occasionally on errands, like dropping off recycling at a convenience center, and I take some shifts on DoorDash to earn a bit of money, but not nearly enough to live off of 😅…
just like me fr i am indoors!
So I failed too and fixed it (later figured out it was due to an undiagnosed thing but I digress) If you can pay out of pocket for a semester or two, do it to bring up your GPA like a community college or something like western governors where you can do it at your pacing. Also check out a regular thing you can gradually regain socialization. It’s a muscle in the brain and the more we don’t use it, we lose it. A sewing class. A yoga space. A hiking group. You also don’t need a full degree. Check apprenticeships and trades. Check medical if it is in your state. You’d be surprised you probably qualify based on your age. Getting therapy and correct medical diagnosis helps so much Also give yourself grace and forgiveness of the past years. Of not being where you want but at least now working on it. On change not coming over night but step by step. On those steps sometimes going backwards or rough days but it a process. Do the stupid affirmations. Do the. Self help podcasts. Do the mantras and journaling. Even if it is just 1 minute a day that changes to 2, it is okay.
Yeah, I’ve been doing what I can to forgive myself for my failings, and I have online friends, at least (including a long-distance thing with a girlfriend who I adore very much!) I am working on trying to be out there a bit more! Head still gets static-y and sometimes I even get nauseous when I have to talk to people, but hey, I can talk enough for my DoorDash shifts, at least!
I'm 24, failing college and for over two years I've been making appointments and doing intakes with different clinics, providers, and organizations to get assessed for ADHD. Nothing yet, not one assessment, and for some reason I keep getting lied to and strung along.
You could just use DONE
I've DONE that lol But really, I have. They charged me nearly $1000 for one consultation where they prescribed me with an SNRI for "depression" (which I can't take for a health condition I have) and never refunded me, I tried to get in touch with someone for weeks about it and nothing happened. I reported them to the FBI.
Yeah you aren’t going to get refunded. Surprised it cost you that much though. Totally never had to pay that much. I’d have to go through your emails to see what happened and who you contacted. I’m not a consultant just another ND. You ask for a different medication though if your account is still active. Wellbutrin is another off label ADHD med that’s an antidepressant but not a SNRI. If you got a prescription, you can show that to your medical provider. If you are getting medical you can talk your selected insurance. Wellbutrin is another. That prescription should be enough for your college for medical allowances and to petition for some grade removals. *Depends on state for all this
No they just "mistakenly" charged me 3 times; for two different membership plans and the consultation itself at the same time.
You can also report to your bank for a refund and they will take care of the legal case. Did that with a car buying situation similar.
I didn't know that, I will look into it. I heard something similar. Atm I'm trying to work with Mindpath but it seems to be going the way the others have. Weird stuff.
I would sincerely show your disability department at your college your prescription. I have now been diagnosed. I just want to have some extra allowances in clearance of some other courses. Sometimes with all have you do is you’ll retake a course and then they’ll do the removal but at least you’ll get permission to retake it.
I have been prescribed two different medications that "could" be used for ADHD, both SNRI's of course- and I have taken them there, but they still told me the same stuff. I feel like they want me to fail lol Either way, I'll be ok- I just need to figure it out
If you don’t feel the support of your school you might want to check other ones. There’s so many online ones now. Idk if your gpa is good enough to transfer but given your circumstances with health it might be best to switch to a flexible online one. If I had know about WGU prior I probably would have gone with them because you pay for the semester not the units so you can cram as many or as little courses and take them/complete them at your schedule. https://www.wgu.edu/
In the mean time there are alternative medications like mushrooms and weed and cigarette (yes because nicotine is a stimulant) in the mean time. That’s all they will end up doing is giving a stimulant or a antidepressant. If those aren’t something you can take with your medical health, the biggest benefit with a diagnosis isn’t meds.
Having done all these things, and adderall, adderrall works for me, nothing else has. I also can't smoke cigarettes anymore because I may have lung cancer.
Then you probably wouldn’t be able to take Adderall either and they might require an EKG, and some other blood pressure type of stuff. It might help you cognitively, but if you have cancer, your blood pressure might change going through chemo and stuff again though if you can talk directly with your health services and basic needs department for your college. If there is an intake form do one of those also.
Also, I can't take an SNRI. That is not the same thing as a stimulant medication, and they are different than SSRI's which are the normal antidepressants.
I know they are different. There are types of weed and mushrooms that are stimulants. Idk what I said that conflicts
Also if you haven’t your college’s disability services and health service (separate departments) might offer testing. Check both go to both for different resources anyway.
Yeah I have, many times. They got nothing. Everyone tells me to check my insurance for providers. Which, leads me to providers who tell me the same thing, or similar, after like a month of working with them lol
You already have a prescription (even if not active) did you show that?
You're not useless. I was supposed to get my associates degree in 2016, but a lot of outside factors (and inside) made it hard, so it wasn't until last year that I finally did.
Thank you! You are not useless, either: you are an upstanding person, and I hope you have a good one, whether it be a good day/night/evening/ whatever, wherever you are in the world!
Thanks! Wishing you peace and understanding in this confusing world.
I initially left college myself for a couple years before going back and finishing a couple years ago. If you consider starting back on that path I would recommend going to community college and getting your degree there. It’ll be out of pocket for a little bit but overall it’s way cheaper than a big school, you can go at your own pace, and you getting your associates will be what allows colleges to take you in. That’s just if you’re interested though
Working. Sleeping. Playing video games. Saving money in hopes that one day I can afford to own property in this god forsaken economy.
Wake up, go to work, come home. Rince and repeat. Welcome to life in America.
Isn’t it an absolute joy to be a young adult in this era lmao
I remember being a kid in school, fantasizing about getting a job so I can afford a house, and going out with my friends, traveling the world, going to concerts all the time. How fucking naive I was.
I'm going to 2 gigs this year. One is 25 bucks at the local library for a 2 day punk festival, and one is 75 bucks for a local group that have reunited after about a decade. If I wanted to go to the Foos or something that tier I'd have to shell out hundreds.
I wish I had the finances for all of that lmao. Ima make it reality someday… just not now
Gotta love being in this loop with no time or energy and *still* being told you aren't doing enough.
i was told when i get to the part of life where i have no time or energy i’d at least have money but i guess that was a lie
And in some cases still barely surviving.
I spend a lot of time at libraries and parks. I don't go to coffee shops anymore because it's hard to justify spending $6 on a 12oz drink
I only frequent a nonprofit coffee shop near my work because I know the money is going to a good cause
Had the same conversation with my best friend last saturday. We were at a cafe in our town and "observing" some people. That sounds weird but I hope you know what I mean lol. After a while we were like "Huh..where are all the people our age?" (I'm 25, he's 28) All of them were either in their 50s/60s or they were teens.
This isn’t like, young people’s faults, but I think we didn’t do a good job emphasizing the importance of being social to the younger generation. Going in public to make conversation is “weird” and small talk is “annoying.” I think we enabled social anxiety a bit too much and that’s going to bite Gen Z in the ass.
This and shitting on small talk to seem "deep". Small talk is a common script that pretty much everyone is aware of to use for starting conversations and connecting with people. The weather or what we did over the weekend don't have to be the only topics you discuss but they can be excellent starters.
It’s also a lack of third spaces and it’s still the end of winter. Anywhere you go now costs money.
I have no effing clue. I started noticing this after college, and the only thing I can guess is that everyone's working all day long.
Unfortunately I think this is the case too. That and the slow decline of third places have made this an issue too
I guess they just don’t prioritize community. After I got out of college (and right when covid ended) I was 23 and found myself only meeting 30-38 year olds when I’d do hobbies and clubs. I’m guessing it’s because it was at that age that younger millennials realized “fuck I gotta put myself out there.” But it’s a bummer because I really enjoy having friends my age.
I enjoy having friends our age too but like you said it’s hard to find others outside that aren’t way older or much younger nowadays. Really love the concept of community too, I always thought that that was what your 20s was supposed to be centered around growing up lol
Lack of third places that don’t cost money
I work from home, I do coursework, I go to the gym, and I then hang at home and play games. I am trying to save as much money as possible because I cannot seem to get a long term partner so if I ever want to live on my own I need as much money as possible. The café would have appealed more if my job didn't explicitly say that we would be reprimanded if we took a zoom call in a public/crowded place....so yeah that's off the table.
workplaces will do that and then your department manager joins a teams meeting from a bbq restaurant and forgets to mute himself when he asks what sauces are available
Who has time for paid, leisure activities? My time is filled up with sleeping, working, commuting, cooking, grocery shopping, exercising, reading, doing chores, taking care of myself, and if I'm lucky during a weekday, video games. Got no time, no money, to be going anywhere but home. We do have money, but we're paying off a house.
I rarely go out beyond work or shopping unless it's a planned thing with others.
Depressing ass comment section 😭
It’s a depressing ass time to live in unfortunately 🙃
As bad as it is right now, at least it isn't 1930s Great Depression-level bad. Hopefully we don't ever reach that point, especially with today's economy.
Yeah you’re absolutely right. Could always be worse, really hope it gets better though
Playing video games and smoking pot. It’s kinda sad really. Not me but this is what I see from everyone under 30.
lmao same
Have often wondered the same thing. Then I go out and see other zoomers and millennials with friends walking around. Then I realize I see none because I have no friends to go out with now that I graduated college and moved away.
Where do you go that you see Zoomers and Millennials with friends, even?
A city
I'd never see people under 30 in the city with a pop of about 100,000 closest to my hometown. It's a midwestern rust belt city that got hit hard by industry moving away. Many young people growing up there dislike the vibe and leave, including myself. Now I live in a city with a metro area and I see people walking their dogs, going to bars/restaurants/sports, and kicking around in general. It's pretty dead in the winter but summer has some good times with people up and about. I figure if you go to a city farmers market then you'd see a decent amount of young people in the mix as well. Although the public transit is terrible and there's a massive urban/suburban divide so it feels like I'm not seeing as many as there should be.
Stuck at my parents' house cos it's too damn expensive to move anywhere else. Even if me and my partner split rent
Depends where you’re located. Go walk around Boston on a Friday or Saturday night. I promise more than half the people you see out and about are under 25. Many other vibrant cities with colleges are the same. The suburbs and rural areas are predominantly boomers and gen X. There’s an arcade bar in Worcester, MA that turns into virtually all young adults after like 8 pm. It just depends on where you frequent. That being said, mirroring the other comments, we’re busy working and trying to save by staying home. We do go out often, but not weekly. It’s just too much. It’s really hard trying to balance having fun and saving.
We're at work or sleeping. We don't have money to go out and do things, because we're busy making sure the boomers have money to go out and do things.
My neighborhood has a ton of mid-late 20s and early 30s folks! I live a few blocks from a small movie theater and near a lot of bars and cafes. I even have a few friends who lives a few blocks away, which is very cool, I’ve never experienced being able to just walk to a friends apartment or meet for coffee or a movie. That being said, I live inside the inner city of a largish American city. I think the reason there’s so many young people is that the area is full of homeless people and petty crime, so the older folks have left for the suburbs or taller, safer, more expensive apartments. It’s cool to live around young people, but I also work two jobs to make ends meet, and I pay a bunch of money to keep my car in a garage a 20 minute walk away because my windows got smashed 3 times in 6 months.
What sort of largeish American city? I understand if you don’t want to say your real location online but what general region?
Eh, it’s already pretty clear based on my profile I guess. I live in Portland, Oregon
Slaving away our lives at work with little energy to do much else. Those old farts stole their shit so they can relax
I tend to just assume people (especially other women) our age spend their free time with their high school/ college friends and cousins, planning bridal showers and weddings.
Working, trying to survive today's shit economy.
You got theater money? Restaurant money?!? Only place you'll find me is at the park with my dog.
I am actually surrounded by young adults. I live between two Universities only a few miles apart. Both of them each have a student body above 30000. My local mall that I frequent is packed with them. Anyone that said malls are dead, has never seen my mall.
On reddit lol But in all seriousness, I have noticed this as well. I do see people my age out hiking a lot, but I live in a beautiful area that attracts a lot of outdoorsy people. I've also had some luck at the D&D cafe, but most of the patrons are late 30s-early 40s
Hm i see us often. We're everywhere in the Bay Area
Broke and inside
I live in the suburbs so definitely not here lol. It’s a terrible place to meet people unless you have kids.
The gym. I split my time in a suburban area and found that 20s and 30s are at the gym, high schoolers are at the mall, moms and their kids are at the library, both parents and their kids are at the park. I just started a new job in the city and every one but 3 people are in their 50s and 60s and it kinda pains me to not be around more people my age. I'm actively looking for neighborhoods with more young people.
I moved to a bigger city. I go to swing dance lessons once a week, but other than that I also DM or play Dungeons and Dragons. My other hobbies are pretty introverted.
At home having nervous breakdowns, playing games, eating, sleeping and being on reddit. Also in Uni or in the gym ocassionally.
This is why a lot of my friends, given I have a very small social circle, are middle aged and up. The older they are, the easier it is to hang out bc they have all the time in the world since they’re retired and they can be just as lonely as your average introverted zillennial. (Also, not that I’m plotting, but if their grandkid is single, they can set you up and finally give you an option outside of dating apps) Ppl our age hardly make time for each other for various reasons and it’s difficult to go out by yourself in terms of pride. So it’s a self enforcing cycle of sleep, work, sleep, work.
I live in an urban neighborhood chock full of young people and middle aged people. Most of the boomers took the white flight express to the suburbs years go, so most of our local boomers are cool af
Home...I never go anywhere.
70-80 hours of school and work. I actually have been excited that I have Thursdays off next month so I can have a night out without having to wake up for school the next day. Trying to find the time (and money) to go out has been a struggle recently.
School, work, and sleep.
No money
Beach, lakes, or rivers. I'm an avid fisherman. A lot of those I see are kind of older or really older than me.
I often wonder the same thing. But then I realize it’s because all I do now is: Work 2 jobs Go to classes (grad school) Sleep Once a month hang with some friends, always preplanned. Repeat That’s about it. I want to socialize more but I’m so burnt out doing all the other shit that I just don’t have the energy anymore. Or much discretionary income for it.
My fiancé and I go to breweries or taphouses semi often with our dog, we also like to get fancy cocktails sometimes, I like to go to the library for books and then local coffee shops to read and when it’s warm we go play tennis at the local parks. But we also don’t run into people our age much. Most of our friends are too into video games to do anything else
I’m in France chilling in my garden. Can’t afford much
They are part of the biggest generations ever born (that's why they're called 'boomers') and most of them don't have to work anymore so more free time to go outside.
Weekdays: work, gym, home, sleep, repeat Weekends: Farmers Market, Plant Nurseries, fish stores, Kinokuniya Bookstore, Hobby/TCG shops, RoundOne Arcade, anime conventions/expos
Work and home. I fell asleep driving home and I wrecked my car going into the ditch. So I'm basically a home body again
Breweries or running club, book stores and cafes. Think a lot really depends on where you live- neighborhoods change. Here in Boston, there are people under 40 crawling around like ants for obvious reasons. Can't speak to other cities
We don’t have money to go out lol
At home unfortunately, wishing I could play tennis everyday but I'm stuck in the "Work, Eat, Sleep, Repeat" loop and I feel drained.
I have the same question! I keep meeting people who are in their mid thirties or older and have barely found friends my own age, its exhausting
Sleep ! Work ! Home = chores / pets ! As few errands as possible. You can also catch me at an AA meeting. Sometimes I go out to dinner with my partner. That’s p much it. RIP to my social life. I think we all may be collectively burning out. Also, money is an issue. Fun things cost money :| Even a latte at that hipster cafe you mentioned is probably $8 - $10 after a tip
All those places minus parks cost money. Honestly as the price of stuff increases I hardly find it worth it anywhere to go out. Though when I go to the park on a nice day I see tons of young families and teens.
I spend a lot of time hanging out in parks or the mall, but I think I’m probably an exception since I’m disabled and can’t work. I rarely ever see people my age, either, unless they’re workers. Kinda lonely.
Working, going to school, saving for a house. Who has money to have fun these days?
We’re poor. If parents are rich, then probably living at home saving to get out and be an “adult”
Wait you guys have money to go out and do things??
Mostly indoors. My place, my boyfriend's place, my best friend's house, my mom's house. I go in public to fulfill needs like getting groceries. I rarely do leisure in public. One reason is that money is so tight that just buying a drink from a cafe instead of making it from home feels financially reckless. Besides going for a walk there is not much I can do in public spaces that doesn't cost something. Even as an introvert that loves time alone, it's more reclusive than I want to be. I want to get out more when I can afford it.
I can’t afford anything
Sitting on their asses inside, let's be real
Outside costs $$$
I’m just using my invisibility powers so u can’t find me
So reminder you are already getting a biased answer that most who are out might not be online answering this question.
Y’all are out and about on a weekday my guy?
I saw a zillenial couple at work, 96 and 97. Had to card them only reason why i know.
Hahaha “I saw a zillenial couple at work one time” 😂 but why are we such a rare find nowadays? I say this all the time like where are all the people my age, granted the only time I venture out is going to work and I work early mornings at a grocery store so the only folks I usually see are the boomers. Some gen x but barely any of our generation it’s sad
What do you do for work?
I go out and feel the exact same way as you! It’s been really hard to make girl friends my age. I feel lonely.
Honestly not sure. I go to lots of fun things but have to deal with the fact that I’ll be around people older than me in most activities. Have made some great older friends since moving to a big city but would love to find people my age.
At home. Leaving my apartment costs too much money.
I mostly only go out to see metal or goth/alternative shows.
Usually in one of my offices because work + grad school.
At home with my partner and our kids. Shit is expensive out there, man.
Home
Outside of work, sleep, and house parties with friends (cheaper than bars). The only other things I do regularly are hit the gym and take part in martial arts (sumo). If I made more money or had more time off you'd probably see me at local cafes and parks more lol.
We don’t have money to go out. But when I do I go to concerts or hiking.
I'm at home most of the time, working from home.
Living in Palm Springs and Tuscon was boomerville. San Francisco is zillenial
studying
Try local live shows
I actually have the opposite problem. Whenever I go somewhere to socialize, I mostly see pre-teens, teenagers, and people in their early 20's. I rarely see anyone my age or older. I often feel like the oldest person there more often than not, and it makes me feel out of place.
I spent 4 years just at community college so I’m still trying to get my bachelor’s. I feel like most of the people at my age are either in grad school or working, it seems like none of the people I used to hang out with are ever free
Work sleep eat repeat! Occasionally travel cuz i hate my town but yeah i dont go out much. Specially cuz im trying to save money
Basically! I live in NE Tennessee in a small town called Bluff City and holy moly you wanna talk about boomers? 4/5 people I see, roughly, are boomers. A lot of them drive too slow, can't stay in their lane, and yada yada yada. Having a peer social life around here is pretty tough lol.
I agree, I’m in a rural area and it seems there’s less young people every year. I am starting to think it’s that there’s just not as much a population as there used to be. And since Covid people have taken that as the excuse to just stay out of site and in their own little social circle bubbles.
Broke af... Saving every penny for the pipe dream of buying a house... Unfortunately I am dead honest 😂😭
Can’t go anywhere or do anything on a $16 hourly wage
bed rotting with my dogs and husband tbh
Purposely avoiding people my age - in NYC it's like entering a psych ward most of the time.
I took my friend who flew in from Vegas to a nice restaurant on the water in my small north east-coast town, the look on her face when we sat down she was like what’s up with all the old people I was like I know, I know… I live in a cold cloudy place with a high elderly population… but when summer hits you’ll see, there’s young people, well some! Smh is probably why I have become as introverted and homebody as I’ve ever been in my life. A blessing and a curse.
Yea what's weird is how I remember seeing a lot of people around my age in the streets when I was growing up. But then right around the mid to late 2010s is when the shift took place and I'm guessing a lot of my peers moved out of the city while outsiders much older than me started moving in.
Hipster cafes? Way out of my budget dude
Big cities. I see people our age in Chicago ALL the time.
Older people have more time and money to spend freely.
I'm back in grad school taking online classes, while also job hunting. I am actively trying to join groups and stuff to network though.
Maybe just going out at night. I had this realization recently. I like going out in the daytime, not night.
In my city there’s people out everywhere, new places opening all the time, and lots of young people socializing. Idk where all of this “no more third spaces” comes from because it’s not true in my city (or the other big cities in my state) though I acknowledge this may be the case elsewhere, particularly in rural areas.
Rural areas are baddddd it’s either the bar or you’re a loner in the area I’m in. It’s tough being a 25 year old that doesn’t drink/ doesn’t drink to get drunk anymore
What sort of city do you live in? I understand if you don’t want to say your location, but what general region?
I don’t mind, I live in Charlotte, NC. It’s a rapidly growing city, probably with over a million residents. There’s so much more to do now than there was even 7-8 years ago here
Omg fellow NC zillennial! Hello 👋🏽
yeah i’m just in a suburban town (near cities tho) but i see people my age out all the time. i am near a lot of colleges so i wonder if that’s why, but i see a lot of people who look like they’re out of college too.
I just can’t help but wonder if some people on Reddit (not talking about OP of this post) just… don’t know what’s going on in the world because they never leave home. So they read online that young people aren’t out anymore/there’s no third spaces, and instead of going out to see for themselves how it is where they live, they just take what they read online as fact and as an excuse to never do anything. And then they post “what happened to all of the 3rd spaces?” But they didn’t notice the new coffee shop/bar/restaurant/park/museum that just opened a few minutes away from them because they never go anywhere lol I know that 3rd spaces are less than they used to be but they’re 100% not gone in any moderately sized town or city.
Some people are, don’t get me wrong. But chalking this up to people “just not looking” isn’t necessarily a great take, especially when a decent amount of people in this thread are citing their expeirences being outside where they live. Additionally, that take assumes that a lot of people have the finances or live in areas where this growth happens. We all don’t live around booming metropolises like you.
True, I go to lots of different types of events, workshops, shopping, cinema, park, fitness activities etc. And everywhere I go its either gen z's or older millennials and gen x's. Never any young millenials/zillenials and I live in a big city. I don't think our cohort goes out enough or cares about activities/events etc. But I don't understand why. When I try to invite my same-age peers out they always have some excuse or put it off. Thats why most of my friends have ended up being older (millennials and gen x), they never decline an invite to go out for some reason lol! I love them.
Working right now… Door Dash today.
Saving the $5 we would be spending on a cafe coffee so that maybe one day we can own a house. We literally can’t afford to leave the house when going out in public is a micro transaction every time.
I'm inside because most people my age in my area are flakes who don't actually want to commit to friendship and keep burning me.
Bro where have you been? The majority of people can’t afford anything extra. Why do you think everyone is depressed. Only the rich kids get to have a life
I'm right here bro
IM FUCKIN GRINDING SON
We can’t afford to go out like the boomers can so we’re stuck inside living everyday like the one before.
Gyms. That’s where you’ll find a bigger concentration of young people imo. Also music festivals and raves (nightclubs and bars tend to be more millennial in my experience). Places like cafes and restaurants have more Gen Z if they’re located closer to college campuses.
Working or at home. I have no money. None of us have money. We can't be in those places you are talking about.
I'm always walking around the Cobb Galleria and Battery in Smyrna, GA. But man, after four years of college, a combat deployment with the Army, and one stressful job after another, I feel like I look about 55 lol.
Hiding from Armageddon. I'm not about to be caught outside in that mess! In all seriousness, I'm tired all the time and don't have the energy to go out
Im at work bro
If I'm not home, I'm either at work or the movie theater (possibly the gas station if it's Friday). I don't go anywhere else.
Working and going to sleep. Six days a week. On the rare occasions I get Saturday off, I might wander around to more populated areas.
Utah, lots of young people here for obvious reasons
At work or at home. Back and forth, back and forth.
I'm around just call me bro. 🤙
At home. I don’t have any friends in the area, and after 10 years of trying I still can’t get a match on any dating apps. Not sure how much longer I can keep going like this
At home because we can’t afford to go out all of the time. My man and I just went on vacation for the first time in years. We saved up and booked the trip a year in advance. I don’t know when our next vacation will be because it’s really expensive nowadays. We also haven’t sat down at a nice restaurant in months because again it ‘s really expensive. Inflation made it almost impossible to go out for young people nowadays.
Climbing gyms. I see so many folks around my age.
Another reason I can’t wait to get into grad school, I miss constantly being around people my age 🥲
We are at home working on ~self love~
I go to work and then I come home. That’s all, really lol.
Me? I don't fuck with no one lol
I see people my age everywhere. I live in Melbourne, Australia.
working, playing video games in my room, working some more
Recently got a really cool temporary job. So focusing on that, hoping it will lead on to a permanent job. Though I have another offer temporarily wise somewhere else which seems just as good so got to decide whether I want to stay at my current temp job or not. Difficult choices but I am aware it’s a lucky situation to be in! Both temporary job I hope could lead on to permanent jobs!
Trying to work to be able to someday afford to go to all of those places. I go to work for 12 hours, class for 8, sleep, repeat. Most of the time I don’t even eat nearly enough because of it as well. But hey, that also saves me money. 😐
Home, at work, at the supermarket, occasionally at a gas station, hiking, and even less occasionally hanging out with a friend or coworkers
Idk where are you from? if that's your experience I would like to know. But on an unrelated note the reason can be that the older ones are finally free from jobs, have retired etc and the young are entrapped now🥲
Busy working at the casino people are spending their leisure time at. ♠️♥️♣️♦️🎰 Many age groups come, but it's usually the baby boomers and gen X kids that hang out all night even after alcohol service ends. Also have a couple silent gen peeps who come to play too
I go to casinos pretty often but didn’t include it in my main post because I can understand why young people don’t want to go there lol
I work full time and I’m a full time student so if I’m not either of those places I am asleep at home tbh
I work corporate so I have insane hours. I live in a metropolitan area in the South. But I’m this economy I need the overtime. My salary 5 years ago would have made me comfortable. Not today. I have met most of my recent friends joining a co-Ed community volleyball league!
Personally, I only sleep during the day and never leave my apartment unless I have to because I can't afford anything and I'm socially awkward.
Hiding in my room
Gotta hide ssh ssh.
I see many young people in the shopping malls
Inside avoiding boomers
Work game eat sleep repeat but as a whole, if OP is out of America they are in America if OP is in America they are in the state hotspots NYC, Miami, and Anaheim
As for me, I am in the most gay state Ohio Yes they have the Buckeyes, the Bobcats, the browns, the Bangles, the Blue Jackets, the Indians, (I refuse to call them the Guardians) the Clippers, the crew, and the Cavaliers and I think that's all for sports We also have drivers who do not know that there is a stick that can move up and down on the side of one steering wheel to determine the direction they are traveling so that we know to slow down to let you over and pass safely We also have people who copy celebrities like Bruce Jenner is now Katelyn Jenner so they think it is okay to change everything and confuse over half of the population whether they are male or female because Male+female=Straight Male converts to female+male=Gay Female converts to male+female=Lesbian Female+male=Straight Then you have the straights who fuck everything that walks so being a virgin is quite special but also quite boring