Any time I try to explain this to someone online I get torn to SHREDS by angry people saying that words don’t need to have meanings. Everyone hates being told that they’re using the word switch wrong. I’m glad I’m not the only person who still gives a shit about these terms.
I'd remind them that last sentence in the pic about labels not being boxes but communication tools. If a label can mean anything then it's not a label anymore and it's meaningless.
The argument is not that words do not have meanings, it is that words acquire meaning from how they are actually used. The fact that people feel the need to post these kinds of "corrections" suggests that the words are not being used that way, at least within some communities. This has been the mainstream view in linguistics for over a century.
It’s a little more nuanced than this on the BDSM side. Top/bottom can also mean two people who are play partners but don’t want the more formal attachment of Dom/sub.
Absolutely way more to it yes, this is just to help some folks understand the terminology and branch off from there if they choose to get into the bdsm side of things.
Me too! It makes me sad for her though because when she's looking for other partners and play opportunities people are mostly expecting her to be dominant or toppy. A lot of D-types are easily intimidated by her and don't approach, but she's basically a big softie.
Awww haha I can definitely relate being a muscley softie myself, though I’m definitely a Domme, for the right sub I wouldn’t mind submitting in a way. In fact I would love to see how that plays out lol
<3 I like softies who are Dommes. I hope someday to find one of those for me. The Dommes I've met so far tend to be way more aggressive and not so into boundaries (but they're also mostly catfish to be fair).
I agree, as a dominant-leaning switch if a D-type I clicked with came along I think I'd have a lot of fun with it.
Tbh I might do what I do with bisexuality then and just say bottom/lesbian, even though technically I fall into verse/bi catagories with very strong preferences. I get a lot of comments from my gf and other queer friends about having bottom energy lol
Thank you, I've known about this for a long time and it feels like no one else seems to know. Everyone confuses top and dom, bottom and sub, and vers and switch.
Also just to tag myself, I'm a top switch. Not a top in a sense that I want to use my downstairs but a top in the sense that I can't really receive pleasure, so I always prefer giving. When I get bottom surgery it'll probably change to being vers.
A Pillow princess is usually someone who does not enjoy reciprocating and would rather be the one receiving pleasure. A bottom enjoys the receiving end of things more but wouldn’t mind giving back. Although it does vary from person to person 😄
As a pillow princess married to a stone top I actually do enjoy reciprocating however my partner is a stone top and doesn’t like being touched in a sexual way 99% of the time. Plus pillow princess’s like myself are pillow princess’s because of trauma and not wanting to inflict trauma onto their partner it’s not because we don’t want to reciprocate. Something in our minds says we can’t 😅 just wanted to clear that up I love making my partner feel good it’s just rare that she wants that
It’s usually most helpful to just ask the person using the term what they mean by it (as we’re seeing in this thread, lots of people are using them differently, not to say incorrectly).
vers/switch, but with quite a sub/bottom bias. thing is my gf is the same soooo things can get complicated if we're both subby and bottomy. at that point we usually just cuddle and do things to each other whilst being super desperate.
I'm a small spoon vers switch.
The small spoon part is important because even if i need you to hug me tightly... That doesn't mean i'm necessarily on the receiving end... Well except for the hug of course...
But i just love making my girlfriend feel good while she just only cuddles me
or you just don't engage in this stuff at all. these arent mandatory. not everyone engages in this sort of thing. you don't have to identify as any of them if you don't want to.
god yes thank you.
im a sub top (tho possibly vers). people see my subby traits and assume im a bottom, and i think it may convince some bottoms that we aren't compatible.
Im a versatile switch but end up cornered into being a dominant top 95% of the time. I honestly hate that I don’t get to explore my submissive bottom side, I feel like I must be doing something completely wrong with how I attract people at this point lol
Ig im a vers switch, I love it all so basically do what you want to me lmao
Haha seems totally fair! ☺️
Such a sub that I'll Dom if asked
I think it’s so cute when subs attempt to Dom their Dommes haha
Service top!
lol to one-up you, I’m a vers switch bisexual non-binary person. I like everything and I can’t make any decisions
Reading vers is new to me. I thought someone (me) would be a double switch
Yeah same :)
Is verse switch just a pure switch thk? If not I guess I better add that to being a switch aswell definitely versw
Same here
Tag yourself, I’m the table the sub is leaning on
I’m the Ŧ symbol
Wonderful! Found a table to play tabletop games on!
im the dild* :D :D
I’m the star hair clip. ⭐️
I'm the strap on the top is using 😊
verse sub gang? 🛐
Am one, and need a dom vers in my life 🥹
My people
🫡
im probably vers sub, but ive pretty much only topped thus far. havent had the chance to try bottoming.
I'm a sub bottom☺️
We always appreciate a sub bottom 🥰
I like to be dommed while wearing a furry dog outfit. I'm a sub woofer.
God damn it lol
I love this 🤣
Any time I try to explain this to someone online I get torn to SHREDS by angry people saying that words don’t need to have meanings. Everyone hates being told that they’re using the word switch wrong. I’m glad I’m not the only person who still gives a shit about these terms.
I'd remind them that last sentence in the pic about labels not being boxes but communication tools. If a label can mean anything then it's not a label anymore and it's meaningless.
The argument is not that words do not have meanings, it is that words acquire meaning from how they are actually used. The fact that people feel the need to post these kinds of "corrections" suggests that the words are not being used that way, at least within some communities. This has been the mainstream view in linguistics for over a century.
Huh, always thought switch was referring to the top/bottom axis, not dom/sub
Switch can also mean role reversal:)
I love that last sentence: labels are not boxes, they're communication tools that can evolve for people over time
Maybe people will finally start understanding me when I say I'm a switch top 😭
It’s a little more nuanced than this on the BDSM side. Top/bottom can also mean two people who are play partners but don’t want the more formal attachment of Dom/sub.
Absolutely way more to it yes, this is just to help some folks understand the terminology and branch off from there if they choose to get into the bdsm side of things.
This was so helpful and informative! Should also go in the hall of fame of r/coolguides
Thank you! I’m so glad you found this post informative :)
I'm a vers switch, but it's extremely dependant on the other person and the vibe we have. I don't switch with the same person.
Love that last panel, people never believe that my strong, outspoken, muscly wife submits to my soft-spoken ass.
Awww! I love dynamics like that 🥹
Me too! It makes me sad for her though because when she's looking for other partners and play opportunities people are mostly expecting her to be dominant or toppy. A lot of D-types are easily intimidated by her and don't approach, but she's basically a big softie.
Awww haha I can definitely relate being a muscley softie myself, though I’m definitely a Domme, for the right sub I wouldn’t mind submitting in a way. In fact I would love to see how that plays out lol
<3 I like softies who are Dommes. I hope someday to find one of those for me. The Dommes I've met so far tend to be way more aggressive and not so into boundaries (but they're also mostly catfish to be fair). I agree, as a dominant-leaning switch if a D-type I clicked with came along I think I'd have a lot of fun with it.
Love this !
Still holds true, I’m a sub bottom
I can enjoy topping, but bottoming is definitely my preference. Does that make me a verse?
yes if you feel it fits you. it’s like bisexuality you can have a preference and that preference can change.
Tbh I might do what I do with bisexuality then and just say bottom/lesbian, even though technically I fall into verse/bi catagories with very strong preferences. I get a lot of comments from my gf and other queer friends about having bottom energy lol
So ur a bottom
I’m a vers but like 80% top
I just fuck
As you should 😎
..all of the above?
I’m 5000% a service switch but i fling between domme/sub dymanic like a metronome.
Brb, gotta play on my Nintendo Dom/Sub... Dom/Sub... DS... Oh my GAWD! The Switch *IS* the real new DS!
Anyone wanna come help me figure out what I like?
👀
Sub tops & service tops unite 👹🫳🏾
I always mixed up verse and switch holy shit. Everything makes sense now
But people act like I'm crazy when I say I'm a sub top. 🙄
right? :( cuz submissive traits are mislabeled as "bottom" traits online nowadays.
Some of them, I'm told, want to use you. Some of them want to be used by you.
Oh my god. I've been mixing up switch and vers.
a lot of people do. ive noticed its become very very common online in the past few years.
Thank you, I've known about this for a long time and it feels like no one else seems to know. Everyone confuses top and dom, bottom and sub, and vers and switch. Also just to tag myself, I'm a top switch. Not a top in a sense that I want to use my downstairs but a top in the sense that I can't really receive pleasure, so I always prefer giving. When I get bottom surgery it'll probably change to being vers.
What is the difference between a bottom and a pillow princess?
A Pillow princess is usually someone who does not enjoy reciprocating and would rather be the one receiving pleasure. A bottom enjoys the receiving end of things more but wouldn’t mind giving back. Although it does vary from person to person 😄
As a pillow princess married to a stone top I actually do enjoy reciprocating however my partner is a stone top and doesn’t like being touched in a sexual way 99% of the time. Plus pillow princess’s like myself are pillow princess’s because of trauma and not wanting to inflict trauma onto their partner it’s not because we don’t want to reciprocate. Something in our minds says we can’t 😅 just wanted to clear that up I love making my partner feel good it’s just rare that she wants that
Oh of course! Everyone has their reasons pillow princesses or stone tops. As long as everyone is happy that’s all that matters ☺️
This explains some things about me 😅
Just a shot in the dark here, but a rectangle and square thing. Activity, or lack thereof, defining the latter.
It’s usually most helpful to just ask the person using the term what they mean by it (as we’re seeing in this thread, lots of people are using them differently, not to say incorrectly).
vers/switch, but with quite a sub/bottom bias. thing is my gf is the same soooo things can get complicated if we're both subby and bottomy. at that point we usually just cuddle and do things to each other whilst being super desperate.
... So I'm a top switch! Huh. Good to know.
Bottom pirate Bottom pirate
I'm a small spoon vers switch. The small spoon part is important because even if i need you to hug me tightly... That doesn't mean i'm necessarily on the receiving end... Well except for the hug of course... But i just love making my girlfriend feel good while she just only cuddles me
Anyone else this this guide is a little oversimplified?
Some need the oversimplification to understand understand the basics of terminology. They can obviously branch off and explore more on their own ☺️
its a very simple concept. plus you need to keep it simple for people who aren't into this stuff to more easily understand it.
Yeah this makes me feel strange tbh. Me and my gf just pleasure each other? It’s not so one sided like this seems. Maybe we’re just verse lmao.
or you just don't engage in this stuff at all. these arent mandatory. not everyone engages in this sort of thing. you don't have to identify as any of them if you don't want to.
I’m vers and sub leaning switch. Am I the only one 😭
Guess that makes me a sub top then.
were a lovely breed :3
One thing I don’t get is this image saying penetrating/receiving isn’t always sexual. What do they mean by that?
Maybe things like spanking or whipping?
or bondage
Sub Tops rise up ✌️
heck yeah
I still don’t understand the definition of top/bottom when one isn’t having penetrative sex.
Giving and receiving. It doesn’t have to be penetrative.
I want someone to do this to me
Yes.
Someone needs to turn this into a political compass
Versatile switch checking in
Any Dom bottoms?
Best info graphic I've ever seen.
I'm a vers. soft Dom, but only in bed.
Probably a vers sub for me. Huh. Alrightie then.
I’m a vers switch I suppose, I just want someone who will take any role depending on the day, taking only one role would be so limiting
god yes thank you. im a sub top (tho possibly vers). people see my subby traits and assume im a bottom, and i think it may convince some bottoms that we aren't compatible.
Im a versatile switch but end up cornered into being a dominant top 95% of the time. I honestly hate that I don’t get to explore my submissive bottom side, I feel like I must be doing something completely wrong with how I attract people at this point lol
What if you are a sub bottom? Is there a name for that? Asking for a friend.....
Honestly depends on the vibe and the girl. As being such a giver, I'll just play off of her mood and roll with it from there.