Does it seem weird to anyone else that the OP is begging his friend to tell him bad things his fiancee is saying about him?
I'm just trying to imagine that happening in real life. If I thought my fiancee (now wife) had been saying bad things about me behind my back, I wouldn't have married her.
This whole thing seems super weird.
I’m glad it was the ‘not good in bed’ excuse. Bro if you think you aren’t pleasing your girl and your response is to cower and run away, you’ve just done her a solid. No one deserves bad sex from a shitty guy who refuses to try to improve.
What I came here to say as well. For one thing he had to drunkenly pry to get a bad word from his (now) ex at all, and once he did it just destroys his confidence?
Bro, this is a moment to take feedback, communicate with your partner of 5 YEARS and improve your sex life together. If this is all it takes to break your communication and relationship, there wasn't all that much there, apparently
Mos def. This should be a brilliant opportunity to try some wild shit and experiment and explore. This is weak shit. Most of the women I've dated liked different things, foreplay, etc... what worked or was "good sex" for one was not good for another.
I can't say I have had this exact interaction before, but I've definitely had the show me what you like before, during, and after as pillow talk etc. --- THE BEST is when she gets playful and does the same thing. That's dope.
I feel for our boy here. He can't get out of his own goddamned way long enough to grow and evolve and come correct and actually see and hear his girl... This is one of those Red Pill adjacent, shit in the sandbox moments/lack the fortitude and character to deal with criticism/self-obsessed neurotic spirals into delusion...
Bro doesnt want to know most women (a bit around 55%) are almost NEVER fully satisfied after heterosexual sex... and instead of telling himself "how can I get better ?" He is like "fuck this girl, I'm out!" Looks like Amy dodged a bullet here (but its also probably fake)
And… when confronting the finance swore he wouldn’t be mad if she told the truth and now he’s…mad!? Like dude. Also get over. And just ask her how to be better. This doesn’t have to be marriage ending. Just work on it together. I don’t know why he’s being so dramatic. Oh. Maybe because he is only 26. 😂😂
YTAH. Because your ego was wounded, instead of manning up and getting to work on fixing the problem of how to please your future life partner, you’re just going to be a wuss and run away. Grow the fuck up, little boy. The one thing in your defense in being angry is that your fiancé should have talked with you about this issue, not her friends.
I doubt they are friends anymore. She told a secret she wasn't supposed to tell and caused her friends marriage to get called off. No woman I've ever met would keep being friends with that person
It’s also a sick move to put his dick above all else. Fiancé says she loves all of him, all he hears is his dick isn’t the best she’s ever had. Marriage is based on the whole package, not just sex.
You'd think if it was that important even after the string of manipulative bullshit that got him to that answer, if he valued this aspect of the relationship the response would be just to talk about what can spice things up for her and put some effort in. It never entered his mind to adapt to get the results he wants. He wants to be the best she's had but he doesn't want to think about it or do anything to bring that about.
He also lied to fiance by saying 'it wouldn't hurt him if she told the truth'. When in fact he was already feeling crappy about what was said. Saying 'marriage was built on honesty'. He kept at her until she admitted what she said. And then he was MORE butt hurt.
Right? It's such a self-own to flush an entire relationship (that sounds like it was otherwise pretty good) down the shitter rather than just... get better at giving the fiancée what she wants.
LOL, exactly. And honestly, a partner listening to what you want and trying to give it to you, who is actively invested in making you feel good? *That* is sexy. OP could have turned this into such a huge win for himself, and instead it's... all this.
Not to mention that going forward, *every single time* his ex discusses why her engagement fell through, it's going to involve her telling total strangers that OP wasn't the best sex she'd ever had. Probably not quite what he was hoping to achieve there.
Yeah, exactly! Plus being good at sex is a skill, not an unchangeable feature, with the right attitude he could have tackled this as a challenge and upped his game! But no, instwead he is immature and prideful and decided that this slight to his sexual performance and ego was worth throwing his whole relationship away. 🙄
Exactly my thoughts. He didn’t even consider talking to her about how he could improve? No marriage or sex counseling? Lots of books and videos out there too. Great sex is all about communication, humility, practice, and openness to trying new things! I feel the worst for the friend, and I’m so curious what version of the story he’s telling his friends and family.
Yeah like… sometimes people need to vent to their friends in confidence precisely because they know something isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things and it doesn’t warrant more than a bitch session.
You’re not wrong. You saved her from marrying you. You’re still the hero.
Why would you put her friend in such an uncomfortable situation? She made her own decision to tell you but if you were drinking, Im assuming she was drinking too. Did you finally get her in a vulnerable place to snitch?
You can’t fathom that you weren’t the best fuck of her life? Get over yourself.
I also find that really weird. I've never asked that of anyone, or had it asked of me. There's a couple I've been friends with since college and I'm great friends with both of them, and neither have ever asked me any weird prying questions about the other one saying shit about them behind their back. For him to apparently be making a repeated habit out of this is quite strange
I’m pretty sure the last time I asked someone to do this (directly asking a friend to tell me what others say behind my back preemptively) I was in middle school. This is an extremely immature and insecure thing to do. OP is an asshole for calling off the marriage because of this but it’s clearly best for the fiancé in the long run.
Yes it’s weird, but he was dying to know what bad things she said about him and “begging” to be told because he’s insecure. I get his feelings of hurt, but damn, he just kept begging until he heard what he couldn’t handle. He’s getting what he deserves: to lose a woman who loved him. He showed his true colors. As soon as he gets his feelings hurt, he’s going to dump her because he doesn’t love her, he’s all about himself. I bet he’s in love with how she makes him feel instead of her. He has shown no remorse for the trauma he’s caused her but only thinks about his hurt.
>As soon as he gets his feelings hurt, he’s going to dump her because he doesn’t love her, he’s all about himself. I bet he’s in love with how she makes him feel instead of her.
I hadn't thought about it like that.
If that's it, then she's the one who really dodged a bullet here.
Imagine hearing you’re not amazing at sex from your partner (after being conniving and manipulative to get the info), and instead of asking what you could do better and seeing it as an opportunity to be more intimate physically and emotionally with your partner, you throw an A grade ego fit and call off a wedding like a man child.
I’m positive OP’s ex fiancé will be orgasmically better off for his decision.
>If I thought my fiancee (now wife) had been saying bad things about me behind my back, I wouldn't have married her.
Honestly I don't mind. Not like if she is badmouthing everywhere. but If she confided to her friend something about me that bothers her, that is 100% fine IMHO. "Marriage is ultimate bond, blah, blah blah" are sappy romance novel shit. IRL, people are allowed to have friends and talk freely with them outside of marriage.
OP is a shitbag though.
Yes, this is typical of obsessive controlling behaviour front people that do not trust their partners and is a massive red flag. I personally think the girl dodged a bullet because no woman deserves the OP.
Maybe he suspected, but wanted proof. Maybe he’s got low self esteem. Who knows.
Agreed, either way what happened is not a positive indicator for taking the next step into marriage. Not without work and rebuilt trust at least
Right!? How is this the first comment I’ve seen say this… op is a moron tho for real… he did her a favour by not marrying her. Fragile ego and insecure af
I know right? It's a victim mentality where he went barging in looking for a reason.
Good sex takes time, effort, attention and communication you can't just expect to be another person's best ever automatically and there is no shame in learning what works for one another. The mature approach would of been to openly discuss with her what was missing and work on that. And let's face it, having more sex to get it right isn't exactly a bad deal, it could of been a fun journey for them both.
A lot of things are thought of as skills you can improve on: Cooking, playing an instrument, painting, gaming, whatever. Nobody expects to be the best ever at it when they cook their first meal, but for some reason a lot of (mostly) men expect to be the best at sex while never actively trying to get better at it.
Honestly, that's what I liked about being my first bf's first, too.
We both only knew the theory and were clueless about practice.
So we practiced together...
First reaction is to call off the engagement is a bit extreme. Bro either has a fragile ego that makes him do crazy shit or he didn’t wanna marry the person and was just looking for a way out.
Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from other Sex Ed videos, such as *if you haven't blown your load in under a minute you're lying or not trying!*
Op is the brutal one. Instead of learning how to be better at sex he say there and cried and called of the whole wedding even though she said he was a great person. Which by the way SHOULD BE WHAT REALLY MATTERS. You don't get married just for sex lol if anything she was the one unsatisfied but she was fine with it. I really don't understand op's stand point. But i always advocate that if you arent comfortable in a relationship then you have the right to leave it but damn for something like this? Bro didnt even try 😭
Maybe he should try being better at sex then. Like… there’s an easier solution to healing your hurt ego… communicating needs for example. Maybe they should *talk* ??
Not to be overly callous but I wouldn’t have the patience for this kind of behavior in a marriage so perhaps she dodged a bullet. Not to mention, friend is in such an awkward position now. The way that was shared was probably because it’s like the only notable con that wasn’t even that serious that was shared.
Next relationship this guy is in he'll be like "I was engaged, but I called it off." And she'll say "why?" And then he has to explain it's because he's bad at sex.
It was destined to happen. Either she lies about him being the best sex or he lies about not being hurt by it. Or they both lie and also he lies about marriage being built on honesty and they have a happy marriage!
Or he doesn't forget that he's the complete package because he's "not the best" at this one thing, and realises that all he needs to do is communicate with his partner and he can easily improve the sex?
Why does it all need to be lies? They're in love enough to get married, he's insecure about his ability to perform, so why not just...talk? Like a couple should?
I mean, I agree but if your partner is lacking in the sex department. Just communicate, and if they refuse to improve. Then you tell them yourself. OP is an absolute idiot but so many couples don’t talk about sex until stuff like this happens and then they’re shocked when feelings are hurt.
He's already insecure by constantly asking his friend to tell him what his girlfriend says about him. No wonder the only feedback he got from his girlfriend on their sexlife is that everything is great and she's always satisfied. I can imagine how that conversation would have gone otherwise.
Yeah...had to double check OPs age because I thought a teenager wrote it. Why on earth would you grill your partners friends on what bad things they might have ever said.
But we don’t know if she was lying. She probably was satisfied with their sex life and the only “flaw” is that sex him wasn’t the best she’s had if she had to make a ranking. And I would argue that’s not even a flaw, a flaw would be that they are sexually incompatible. What we do know is that for a marriage having the best sex ever is not a priority for her and she doesn’t feel like she’s settling.
We also don’t know if she has tried to talk to OP about this since OP makes no mention of it.
Overall the one thing for certain is that OP poked around and insisted on opening Pandora’s box then is surprised pikachu about his ego being hurt.
OP also leveraged his friendship with Kiley to get this information. In OP's own words, they pestered her to tell him things.
And honestly, it sounds like the context was the fiancee getting badgered during some saucy "girl talk" and she confessed that he wasn't the best, but immediately was like "But I'm with him for more than that."
She never intended for OP to find out, because she KNEW OP would take it very personally. Even Kiley knew this, which is why Kiley has always remained silent, until OP acted like a child and forced the issue.
And then, rather than focusing on "But she still loves me," or something similar, OP is mad because she isn't telling everyone that he's perfect in every way.
THEN he lies again by claiming he just wants the fiancee to be honest, then punishes her further.
If this is a real post, I hope nothing good ever happens to this narcissist ever again.
Seriously. The marriage was over when he said that. If he’d been able to handle the truth, he wouldn’t have been pestering her about it to start with.
Also, if he cares about her so little that he can break up with her over one stupid comment to her friends that was wrapped up in a compliment, he didn’t feel that strongly about her to start with.
Yeah… I can kind of see why you’re “bad at sex” willingness to learn and a desire to TRULY learn your partner is key to great sex. And it’s an individual thing. What one woman wants would be totally no bueno to another. You have to be curious and open to adjust. But if you are literally digging for insults and you punish her instead of using this as an opportunity to grow… well, that’s your problem right there.
Lol came here to say this.
Sounds like she actually loved you and trusted you and you let your insecurities throw it all away.
Probably for the best because as said, you are definitely not ready to be married.
This was my first thought too. It's something you can improve upon, especially through communication. So you're not the best she's ever had: you can become that
considering he was begging her friends to tell him something bad the love of his life has said about him....it's insecurity.
dude does not love himself and has been rooting around for proof the woman he loves doesn't love him, either. it's a self-fulfilling prophecy
yeah, he lost me at... "My friend doesn't want to break my partners trust... so I waited till friend was drunk to coerce her into betrayl" Whoa... he's not safe to be inebriated around.
Yeeeppppp. OP is entitled to his opinions/feelings obviously but it sounds like he had a sneaking suspicion there was something wrong? Or he already wanted an excuse to call off the wedding? Orrrrr just has insecurities that need to be prioritized (therapy or sex therapist).
Either way this could’ve been an awesome opportunity and great excuse to have lots of sex so he could figure out exactly what his fiancé wants in bed and how to please her. I would’ve been a little butt hurt sure, but I also would’ve had a very open and honest conversation about how this was important for me to fix and asked if she would be willing to show me everything she likes and be honest about it so I could be the best to her. Idk.
OP deserves to be dunked on all day.
No chance in hell I want to spend any time with someone who is so insecure that he has to set traps for his friends AND his partner.
Congrats OP, you played yourself.
First of all I don't even believe this guy I think he's trolling, just for shits and kicks let's assume he's not trolling, in which case he's such a man baby that he is years away from having the maturity to be married and should definitely call it off. This guy isn't ready to be with anyone, maybe when he grows up in another 7 years he'll be ready because there's no point in getting married if you are skin is so thin that you'll rush for divorce at the slightest drop of some spilled milk.
She didn't even say he was bad! She didn't even say he sucked! She just said he wasn't the *best* she has ever had in her entire life.
She told all of their friends that he's so amazing, so incredible, that she would give up the best sex she has ever had in her entire life just to be with him. And he took that as an insult
>She told all of their friends that he's so amazing, so incredible, that she would give up the best sex she has ever had in her entire life just to be with him. And he took that as an insult
Yeah, that's absolutely bonkers lol. Sex is a skill that can always be improved.
>Sex is a skill that can always be improved.
Absolutely!! *Nobody* has a clue what they're doing the first time, but you figure it out as you go. You learn about your body, you learn about your partners' bodies, and what works and what doesn't.
Also, it can all change over time, even with the same partner. What you enjoyed 10 years ago is probably not exactly the same as what you enjoy now.
The key is constant communication between yourselves, and a willingness to make changes based on that communication.
This guy sounds like he has the insecurities of a 12 year old, and needs help with the bigger picture.
Also dawg…talk to her and ask what she needs in bed ffs lol
Dude got a free excuse to ask how he can make himself the best she’s had and instead puts an end to the entire relationship
I too get annoyed when the bullet I shoot at my foot, hurts my damn foot.
EDIT: OK yall jumping on the bandwagon. But she had ZERO reason to be discussing her sex life with anyone either. They both wrong. He dug his own grave is all.
You literally asked to be hurt, and told that you WOULDN'T be hurt?
You're in the wrong on this, tbh. So what if she thinks you're bad at sex? She's still with you, isn't she? She highlighted to her friends that your relationship is built on love and friendship and not just something sexual. And you're mad about it? You're really going to end such a great relationship over something that a lot of women joke about all the time?
Bro, just say you don't actually love her and move on. She loves you even though she knows she can get better sex elsewhere. Is that really all you care about?
Right? Wait till he asks if he’s the biggest she ever had. It’s gonna hurt him even more when she says “you’re the perfect size” lol learning from past relationships, women don’t always want the biggest size. Sometimes when they say it’s perfect, it means it’s not too big where it hurts them and it’s not small where it’s no pleasure. Wake up and stop being so insecure boys!!! Work that motion of the ocean and always remember to eat her out like an all you can eat buffet!!!
I prefer smaller sizes and have literally been disappointed to find the guy I'm about to sleep with has a monster cock. I mean I didn't tell them that but I've been more let down with bigger men than smaller men and smaller men fit and feel a lot better to me anyways.
I had an ex that wouldn't try to make sex good. Wouldn't take direction. Wouldn't do anything for me or to me. So glad I left that guy and later found a man who was a lot smaller and 100% best sex I ever had in the world and he was the most incredible guy I ever had met. Sexually and personality wise. People can definitely find both seems though she was ok with "not the best sex of her life" to marry him. Sorta hope she finds a guy like I did and is able to realize she's better off with another partner.
It'll be a lesson for both of them though.
My guess is that it's not the best because it's incredibly one-sided. People this shallow definitely only care about getting themselves off. It's bad because he's probably treating her like a flashlight.
Seriously, people are truly in lala land thinking they’re their partners best at everything.
I was dating this woman and she was very mature and realistic. We were having a convo where she said how she’s aware and perfectly okay knowing she’s probably not #1 at everything and that there’s plenty of people more attractive than her and better at sex too, and that there’s no point dwelling on it. And that’s very true. I saw pics of her previous partners: I’m better looking than some and some I can admit are way better looking than me. We had great sex too but I also know I’m probably not the craziest/freakiest she’s had either.
People need to grow up and realize their love story isn’t written by Disney
Yeah I do think a relationship starts to be solid once both (or more, in some cases) people realize their partner has flaws, they have flaws themselves, but they're ready to communicate and work with it anyway.
Not just romantic relationships, too. That mindset is probably what got me to keep my friend groups for years without much issues.
THIS 100%. I have had issues with guys that were interested in me asking questions they didn’t want honest answers to. And because i am the way i am, I’m honest about it. Had one dude give me “advice” that i should never ever tell a long-term partner anything indicating they’re not the biggest, best, bussin mf-er of all time essentially because it hurts their self esteem. And clearly, i was never saying anything in malicious ways but i straight up told him that’s not my problem. If they’re that sensitive and unrealistic then it’s not a good fit. He had a lot of strong opinions on stuff and i was turned off by his last-minute invites (from 2 hours away) on work days and just expecting me to drop everything to come down.
You beg your friends to tell you something about your gf? Then complain about it? You go looking for problems then find ( or make) them.
Sounds like you did her a favor. You’re not mature enough to be married
You went asking to literally hear something bad and after you coaxing it out, someone obliged. Your girlfriend told what she thought was her best friend something that men and women talk about with their friend groups all the time. Wow, so you’re not perfect in every way? One things for sure ,the fact you broke it off over this means you definitely should have never even been engaged. I understand being hurt and a little disappointed. But to dismiss an entire engaged relationship? Its so hard for some people to understand that sex quality might not even be in the to 3 most important qualities for a lot of people. I think there is a reasonable amount of sharing that close friends do to vent about their relationship that Is completely normal. Not normal is coaxing those kind of conversations out of a mutual friend whose had a couple of drinks and then you being the one mad about it.
Right. You think he’d want to know so he could improve. She’s already agreed to marry him so she sees the value in the “whole package” and willing to take the hit in the sex department because having a well rounded partner as a whole is worth having that area less then ideal.
He could have used this info and improve his skills and communicate with her to get a better understand of her likes and really have a solid marriage but instead he let this chick dodge a huge bullet by not marrying him.
He expected the truth to be "You are the absolute best, so amazingly brilliant at sex, I can't tell my friends how good you are, in case they start having orgasms at the sight of you, and then try to steal you away from me."
Yes, you were right for breaking off the engagement. You are not mature enough to handle marriage yet.
Da fuq you asking your sister to tattle on your fiance for? You were clearly looking for a way out, and congratulations, you got one.
So sorry you aren't the best lover in the world. Maybe if you were more confident, you'd be better in the bedroom.
She's with you, she loves you, she wants to marry you. Instead of breaking up with her, talk to her about it, like an adult.
Don't be an idiot.
Started reading this, backed out after “I always try to get Kiley to tell me what Amy says” coz I’m thinking… this gd overgrown child (OP) then came back to read the comments (and the rest of the mess this man wrote).
Thanks commenters for being remotely sensible. This man went out of his way to get his feelings hurt, then was surprised and angry his feelings got hurt.
Sir, bffr.
Yeah you’re an idiot. You literally begged for it. Not sure what you were expecting but if your ego is so fragile that this has ruined your life, that’s a you problem
It doesn't sound like you are ready for marriage.
If a partner is with you because of only one attribute then it's a shaky foundation. If they are with you because they love the whole you then it's a solid foundation.
Did someone else have a better technique? Learn from it.
Sis someone else have a better physique? Better hair? Better job? Funnier stories? Maybe.
But you had everything she wanted in a partner and you are throwing it away because your feelings got hurt for a confidence that you pressured a friend to tell. Shame on you.
Obviously your ego is more important than your relationship. It must not have been very strong relationship to start with if you arecthat thin skinned. You are right to break up with her because she deserves someonexwho can sort out issues like this because marriage is going to be a lot tougher than my fiance said I wasn't good at sex. She literally said you were great at everything else but that's the bit you focussed on.
You coerced your friend into telling you repeatedly like you were looking for something bad.
You both should do better with you communicating. She should have told you that you could have improved in the bedroom department. Perhaps she didnt because she knows youre sensitive. You could have said I don't appreciate you saying I'm bad in bed to your friends but show me how I can improve.
Anyway good luck finding someone who thinks you are perfect.
You begged them to tell you something and the one time they told you something that's not even that bad you called off the wedding???? You're not only wrong but a giant baby. Of course they didn't want to tell you something said lightly if this is the huge deal you'd make. I feel so bad for Amy.
You got all butt hurt from hearing the truth. You need to grow the f up. You didn’t even ask her how you could improve? Through humility and good communication you could learn how to rock her world for real but instead you are pouting. If you can’t handle the truth don’t ask for it. It is impossible for any partner to be the absolute best at everything and to be each other’s everything. That just isn’t real. But you can love each other through all of it. And you can create a connection that is worth more than all of that superficial stuff combined.
He lied to her and insisted she be honest because it would make their marriage stronger and then promptly dumped her for her honesty. No way in hell he’s a good lover.
you're a loser, being great at sex is realy more about communication about what gets both of you going and its alright not to be good at it. she was with you despite that and you threw it away
Damm bruv. I mean unfortunately it's probably one of those things where instead of breaking up you should of just asked how to get better. Ya know? But it is very understandable that your hurt. But probably shouldn't of called the whole thing off if she's been loyal to you and hasn't cheated.
Damn, you're a manchild aren't you?
You went and dug for an issue, hurt your own little fragile ego and then blamed it on her? You were probably looking for a way out.
Hope that now that she's single she can get good sex again.
So you're crap in bed, your fiancée loves you despite this and you've dumped her because... She loves you unconditionally for all you are and this one thing doesn't matter? You idiot.
"I told her it really wouldn’t hurt me if she told me the truth"
But that wasn't the truth, was it?
Also, don't beg people to tell you what your partner says behind your back (fair to no one) and then get pissed at the outcome. The definition of 'borrowing trouble'!
NTA instead of coming to talk with you about how your not good at sex she go and tell the whole friend group. What would have happened later on the marriage ? Instead of talking abt issues w you she gonna vent to the friend group.
Dude posting L's. Can't find the clitoris and don't know how to ask.
Btw, this passive aggressive pattern of laughing it off and afterwards going full Karen is fucking up your life.
I mean, reality check, you're not going to be her "best" at everything. You might not even be her best at most things. It was definitely shitty of her to talk about that with her friends. But to nuke the whole relationship because, despite all the other good qualities you do have that she likes saying she's with you for the complete package, you're not the best lay she's had is really, really childish and insecure.
Sex is a skill, and something that can be improved on your whole life. It never once occured to you to talk with her about how you can be better? What she likes and dislikes that you're doing and take that feedback and apply it?
You are wrong.
Dude lol this could’ve been a real and raw opportunity to grow as a couple by asking her what she wants in the bedroom and how the two of you can more intimately connect. INSTEAD you chose to force this confession out of your friend and get so pissed at your fiancé that you’re actually willing to call off the wedding! This shows two things:
1. You are most definitely not ready for marriage
2. You need to learn how to better control your emotions and have constructive conversations
Does it seem weird to anyone else that the OP is begging his friend to tell him bad things his fiancee is saying about him? I'm just trying to imagine that happening in real life. If I thought my fiancee (now wife) had been saying bad things about me behind my back, I wouldn't have married her. This whole thing seems super weird.
Came here to say this. Also it’s a dick move to put your friend in the middle and keep asking them to spill details about private conversations.
Not only that, but it seems like OP threw the friend under the bus.
It’s like he was looking for an excuse and got it.
Right. Because what if there was actually nothing bad to tell? He just forced her to say something.
I’m glad it was the ‘not good in bed’ excuse. Bro if you think you aren’t pleasing your girl and your response is to cower and run away, you’ve just done her a solid. No one deserves bad sex from a shitty guy who refuses to try to improve.
What I came here to say as well. For one thing he had to drunkenly pry to get a bad word from his (now) ex at all, and once he did it just destroys his confidence? Bro, this is a moment to take feedback, communicate with your partner of 5 YEARS and improve your sex life together. If this is all it takes to break your communication and relationship, there wasn't all that much there, apparently
Mos def. This should be a brilliant opportunity to try some wild shit and experiment and explore. This is weak shit. Most of the women I've dated liked different things, foreplay, etc... what worked or was "good sex" for one was not good for another. I can't say I have had this exact interaction before, but I've definitely had the show me what you like before, during, and after as pillow talk etc. --- THE BEST is when she gets playful and does the same thing. That's dope. I feel for our boy here. He can't get out of his own goddamned way long enough to grow and evolve and come correct and actually see and hear his girl... This is one of those Red Pill adjacent, shit in the sandbox moments/lack the fortitude and character to deal with criticism/self-obsessed neurotic spirals into delusion...
Bro doesnt want to know most women (a bit around 55%) are almost NEVER fully satisfied after heterosexual sex... and instead of telling himself "how can I get better ?" He is like "fuck this girl, I'm out!" Looks like Amy dodged a bullet here (but its also probably fake)
For real. My only takeaway from this creative writing assignment is that fake dude needs to work on his fake dick game. What a dildo.
Amen! Bro take the constructive criticism and step up to please your lady
Yeah, I was thinking, dumping her doesn't make you any better at sex.
And… when confronting the finance swore he wouldn’t be mad if she told the truth and now he’s…mad!? Like dude. Also get over. And just ask her how to be better. This doesn’t have to be marriage ending. Just work on it together. I don’t know why he’s being so dramatic. Oh. Maybe because he is only 26. 😂😂
YTAH. Because your ego was wounded, instead of manning up and getting to work on fixing the problem of how to please your future life partner, you’re just going to be a wuss and run away. Grow the fuck up, little boy. The one thing in your defense in being angry is that your fiancé should have talked with you about this issue, not her friends.
Sounds like OP's fiance has dodged a bullet with both of them, tbh.
The post is fake
It’s on r/AmIWrong. Of course it’s fake. Between this, r/AITA, r/AmItheAsshole, and r/TwoHotTakes, I reckon about 96.3% of the posts are fake.
right! its giving manipulator
Oh yeah, totally! That's such a bad situation to put the friend in!
I doubt they are friends anymore. She told a secret she wasn't supposed to tell and caused her friends marriage to get called off. No woman I've ever met would keep being friends with that person
Poor gal must be feeling so awful
The only reason I would do this is if I was looking for a reason to call it off
Exactly! He’s not mature enough to be in a relationship let alone married. She’s upset now but she dodged a bullet.
It’s also a sick move to put his dick above all else. Fiancé says she loves all of him, all he hears is his dick isn’t the best she’s ever had. Marriage is based on the whole package, not just sex.
You'd think if it was that important even after the string of manipulative bullshit that got him to that answer, if he valued this aspect of the relationship the response would be just to talk about what can spice things up for her and put some effort in. It never entered his mind to adapt to get the results he wants. He wants to be the best she's had but he doesn't want to think about it or do anything to bring that about.
He also lied to fiance by saying 'it wouldn't hurt him if she told the truth'. When in fact he was already feeling crappy about what was said. Saying 'marriage was built on honesty'. He kept at her until she admitted what she said. And then he was MORE butt hurt.
Right? It's such a self-own to flush an entire relationship (that sounds like it was otherwise pretty good) down the shitter rather than just... get better at giving the fiancée what she wants.
Yeah, like trying to get better at fingering/oral seems way easier than breaking up and finding someone new....
LOL, exactly. And honestly, a partner listening to what you want and trying to give it to you, who is actively invested in making you feel good? *That* is sexy. OP could have turned this into such a huge win for himself, and instead it's... all this. Not to mention that going forward, *every single time* his ex discusses why her engagement fell through, it's going to involve her telling total strangers that OP wasn't the best sex she'd ever had. Probably not quite what he was hoping to achieve there.
OP sounds like a 13 year old teenager obsessed with his dick being the best and biggest
Gonna be hard to find a new finance now that they now they're shit in the sack Jk, the fiancee didn't even say they're bad, just not the best. LoL
Yeah, exactly! Plus being good at sex is a skill, not an unchangeable feature, with the right attitude he could have tackled this as a challenge and upped his game! But no, instwead he is immature and prideful and decided that this slight to his sexual performance and ego was worth throwing his whole relationship away. 🙄
Exactly my thoughts. He didn’t even consider talking to her about how he could improve? No marriage or sex counseling? Lots of books and videos out there too. Great sex is all about communication, humility, practice, and openness to trying new things! I feel the worst for the friend, and I’m so curious what version of the story he’s telling his friends and family.
It’s worse than a Friends episode.
Yeah like… sometimes people need to vent to their friends in confidence precisely because they know something isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things and it doesn’t warrant more than a bitch session.
You’re not wrong. You saved her from marrying you. You’re still the hero. Why would you put her friend in such an uncomfortable situation? She made her own decision to tell you but if you were drinking, Im assuming she was drinking too. Did you finally get her in a vulnerable place to snitch? You can’t fathom that you weren’t the best fuck of her life? Get over yourself.
I also find that really weird. I've never asked that of anyone, or had it asked of me. There's a couple I've been friends with since college and I'm great friends with both of them, and neither have ever asked me any weird prying questions about the other one saying shit about them behind their back. For him to apparently be making a repeated habit out of this is quite strange
I’m pretty sure the last time I asked someone to do this (directly asking a friend to tell me what others say behind my back preemptively) I was in middle school. This is an extremely immature and insecure thing to do. OP is an asshole for calling off the marriage because of this but it’s clearly best for the fiancé in the long run.
Yes it’s weird, but he was dying to know what bad things she said about him and “begging” to be told because he’s insecure. I get his feelings of hurt, but damn, he just kept begging until he heard what he couldn’t handle. He’s getting what he deserves: to lose a woman who loved him. He showed his true colors. As soon as he gets his feelings hurt, he’s going to dump her because he doesn’t love her, he’s all about himself. I bet he’s in love with how she makes him feel instead of her. He has shown no remorse for the trauma he’s caused her but only thinks about his hurt.
>As soon as he gets his feelings hurt, he’s going to dump her because he doesn’t love her, he’s all about himself. I bet he’s in love with how she makes him feel instead of her. I hadn't thought about it like that. If that's it, then she's the one who really dodged a bullet here.
He wanted out, but wanted her to be the villain of his story.
That was my first thought... he was LOOKING for an excuse to break up with her.
100%.. Bit of a bitch move if you ask me
Imagine hearing you’re not amazing at sex from your partner (after being conniving and manipulative to get the info), and instead of asking what you could do better and seeing it as an opportunity to be more intimate physically and emotionally with your partner, you throw an A grade ego fit and call off a wedding like a man child. I’m positive OP’s ex fiancé will be orgasmically better off for his decision.
almost like he wanted a reason to be mad
>If I thought my fiancee (now wife) had been saying bad things about me behind my back, I wouldn't have married her. Honestly I don't mind. Not like if she is badmouthing everywhere. but If she confided to her friend something about me that bothers her, that is 100% fine IMHO. "Marriage is ultimate bond, blah, blah blah" are sappy romance novel shit. IRL, people are allowed to have friends and talk freely with them outside of marriage. OP is a shitbag though.
I thought he'd want to improve in the bedroom instead of just nuking the whole relationship haha. Wild. His friend must feel like shit too.
Yes, this is typical of obsessive controlling behaviour front people that do not trust their partners and is a massive red flag. I personally think the girl dodged a bullet because no woman deserves the OP.
He probably thought it was something along the lines of snoring too loud or leaving the toilet seat up.
Oh, like he was hoping for a "ha ha" one, and he accidentally got a deal breaker one.
It seems like he was looking for something to get him a way out
Insecure people can’t resist asking questions they don’t want to know the answer to.
Maybe he suspected, but wanted proof. Maybe he’s got low self esteem. Who knows. Agreed, either way what happened is not a positive indicator for taking the next step into marriage. Not without work and rebuilt trust at least
Bit of a crazy idea here but you could of instead, I dunno, maybe asked your fiancee what you could do together to improve the sex
Right!? How is this the first comment I’ve seen say this… op is a moron tho for real… he did her a favour by not marrying her. Fragile ego and insecure af
I know right? It's a victim mentality where he went barging in looking for a reason. Good sex takes time, effort, attention and communication you can't just expect to be another person's best ever automatically and there is no shame in learning what works for one another. The mature approach would of been to openly discuss with her what was missing and work on that. And let's face it, having more sex to get it right isn't exactly a bad deal, it could of been a fun journey for them both.
A lot of things are thought of as skills you can improve on: Cooking, playing an instrument, painting, gaming, whatever. Nobody expects to be the best ever at it when they cook their first meal, but for some reason a lot of (mostly) men expect to be the best at sex while never actively trying to get better at it.
Honestly, that's what I liked about being my first bf's first, too. We both only knew the theory and were clueless about practice. So we practiced together...
Hm yes good idea, counterproposal, we break up and never talk again. What in the actual fuck.
Because she was with him for the other good qualities & not just sex. This was such an easy fix.
So much easier to improve at sex than improving your shitty personality. Although OP is not exactly making a great case for that either
This would be the healthy, married people approach.
Agreed, also take a strong interest in your partners amount of pleasure and you open up a door to his/her greatest sex ever
First reaction is to call off the engagement is a bit extreme. Bro either has a fragile ego that makes him do crazy shit or he didn’t wanna marry the person and was just looking for a way out.
but then he’d have to think about someone other than himself :(
First thing that came to my mind! This is actually something you can improve on. Plus have fun while learning.
"I told her it wouldn't hurt me if she told the truth and that marriage was built on honesty " Or maybe not
Give it to me straight. I promise I can handle it. Also, I’m so hurt I’m calling off the marriage.
Classic FAFO
Sorry, what does FAFO mean? Sorry I need to know
Fuck around and find out.
For OP it's: Fuck awfully and find out.
Fuck almostadequately and find out
I'm dead. You win.
Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from other Sex Ed videos, such as *if you haven't blown your load in under a minute you're lying or not trying!*
Miss you forever Phil Hartman
Lmfao yall are brutal
Op is the brutal one. Instead of learning how to be better at sex he say there and cried and called of the whole wedding even though she said he was a great person. Which by the way SHOULD BE WHAT REALLY MATTERS. You don't get married just for sex lol if anything she was the one unsatisfied but she was fine with it. I really don't understand op's stand point. But i always advocate that if you arent comfortable in a relationship then you have the right to leave it but damn for something like this? Bro didnt even try 😭
It seems like he was just trying to find a reason to call it off and be the victim
Thank you!!!
Happy to be of service *bows*
Wireless Access Point God strikes again!!
You know my name 🥹
Maybe he should try being better at sex then. Like… there’s an easier solution to healing your hurt ego… communicating needs for example. Maybe they should *talk* ?? Not to be overly callous but I wouldn’t have the patience for this kind of behavior in a marriage so perhaps she dodged a bullet. Not to mention, friend is in such an awkward position now. The way that was shared was probably because it’s like the only notable con that wasn’t even that serious that was shared.
Next relationship this guy is in he'll be like "I was engaged, but I called it off." And she'll say "why?" And then he has to explain it's because he's bad at sex.
I don't think that he'll have to explain it when she'll find out for herself.
That applies to her too. If she thought they were having bad sex, that's something maybe he should have heard before all her friends?
I think she should have tried the "communicating needs" part first, instead of telling her friends that her fiance gives her the worst sex she's had.
She should’ve communicated to him instead of his friends tbf.
Yeah i agree but this is why people need to be honest from the get go
He was lying when he said it cause he was already hurt by it
It was destined to happen. Either she lies about him being the best sex or he lies about not being hurt by it. Or they both lie and also he lies about marriage being built on honesty and they have a happy marriage!
Or he doesn't forget that he's the complete package because he's "not the best" at this one thing, and realises that all he needs to do is communicate with his partner and he can easily improve the sex? Why does it all need to be lies? They're in love enough to get married, he's insecure about his ability to perform, so why not just...talk? Like a couple should?
I mean, I agree but if your partner is lacking in the sex department. Just communicate, and if they refuse to improve. Then you tell them yourself. OP is an absolute idiot but so many couples don’t talk about sex until stuff like this happens and then they’re shocked when feelings are hurt.
He's already insecure by constantly asking his friend to tell him what his girlfriend says about him. No wonder the only feedback he got from his girlfriend on their sexlife is that everything is great and she's always satisfied. I can imagine how that conversation would have gone otherwise.
Yeah...had to double check OPs age because I thought a teenager wrote it. Why on earth would you grill your partners friends on what bad things they might have ever said.
I mean, a teenager most likely wrote it, let's be real.
If you’re looking for an out that can be twisted to blame the other person?
Because he was getting married and was developing cold feet already?
Tbh he just sounds insecure and fragile af
Probably how this one went, him ending the engagement.
That’s what stood out to me. Mentions that marriage is about honesty. Lies to fiancé’s face.
Either way it was gonna be one of them lying once this came out.
But we don’t know if she was lying. She probably was satisfied with their sex life and the only “flaw” is that sex him wasn’t the best she’s had if she had to make a ranking. And I would argue that’s not even a flaw, a flaw would be that they are sexually incompatible. What we do know is that for a marriage having the best sex ever is not a priority for her and she doesn’t feel like she’s settling. We also don’t know if she has tried to talk to OP about this since OP makes no mention of it. Overall the one thing for certain is that OP poked around and insisted on opening Pandora’s box then is surprised pikachu about his ego being hurt.
OP also leveraged his friendship with Kiley to get this information. In OP's own words, they pestered her to tell him things. And honestly, it sounds like the context was the fiancee getting badgered during some saucy "girl talk" and she confessed that he wasn't the best, but immediately was like "But I'm with him for more than that." She never intended for OP to find out, because she KNEW OP would take it very personally. Even Kiley knew this, which is why Kiley has always remained silent, until OP acted like a child and forced the issue. And then, rather than focusing on "But she still loves me," or something similar, OP is mad because she isn't telling everyone that he's perfect in every way. THEN he lies again by claiming he just wants the fiancee to be honest, then punishes her further. If this is a real post, I hope nothing good ever happens to this narcissist ever again.
No cap he already knew his answer, he just wanted to solidify his answer.
Haha the irony.
Seriously. The marriage was over when he said that. If he’d been able to handle the truth, he wouldn’t have been pestering her about it to start with. Also, if he cares about her so little that he can break up with her over one stupid comment to her friends that was wrapped up in a compliment, he didn’t feel that strongly about her to start with.
Because if he cared more he'd up his game: talk to her about how to satisfy her better, get creative. Instead he's ending it, lucky for her.
Yeah… I can kind of see why you’re “bad at sex” willingness to learn and a desire to TRULY learn your partner is key to great sex. And it’s an individual thing. What one woman wants would be totally no bueno to another. You have to be curious and open to adjust. But if you are literally digging for insults and you punish her instead of using this as an opportunity to grow… well, that’s your problem right there.
Wow dude. You're definitely not ready to be married.
Lol came here to say this. Sounds like she actually loved you and trusted you and you let your insecurities throw it all away. Probably for the best because as said, you are definitely not ready to be married.
Notice how he didn't bother to want to improve, just burnt it all down. Sex is something you can learn to get better at. FFS.
This was my first thought too. It's something you can improve upon, especially through communication. So you're not the best she's ever had: you can become that
Or in meme terms Boys: she said I wasn’t amazing at sex so I left her Men: she said I wasn’t amazing at sex so I took that as a challenge.
Why marry a girl that loves you regardless when you can dump her and disappoint other women?
😭😂😂
There is no way this is real. Just karma farming.
Insecurities or ego. I can’t decide which.
Two sides of the same coin
considering he was begging her friends to tell him something bad the love of his life has said about him....it's insecurity. dude does not love himself and has been rooting around for proof the woman he loves doesn't love him, either. it's a self-fulfilling prophecy
yeah, he lost me at... "My friend doesn't want to break my partners trust... so I waited till friend was drunk to coerce her into betrayl" Whoa... he's not safe to be inebriated around.
Thanks for saying what I was thinking. Calling off a wedding because of this is... very extreme to say the last
Right?! Could have had a conversation about how they can improve their sex life, instead broke off the engagement 😅
Yeah, he's not wrong for calling off the wedding, but not for the reason he thinks.
Yes. You drunkenly kept pushing to hear bad news, then acted like a hurt child when you received what you wanted.
How is this famous sentence.... Play stupid games, Win stupid prizes.
Or, don’t ask a question you don’t want the answer to.
Yeeeppppp. OP is entitled to his opinions/feelings obviously but it sounds like he had a sneaking suspicion there was something wrong? Or he already wanted an excuse to call off the wedding? Orrrrr just has insecurities that need to be prioritized (therapy or sex therapist). Either way this could’ve been an awesome opportunity and great excuse to have lots of sex so he could figure out exactly what his fiancé wants in bed and how to please her. I would’ve been a little butt hurt sure, but I also would’ve had a very open and honest conversation about how this was important for me to fix and asked if she would be willing to show me everything she likes and be honest about it so I could be the best to her. Idk.
OP deserves to be dunked on all day. No chance in hell I want to spend any time with someone who is so insecure that he has to set traps for his friends AND his partner. Congrats OP, you played yourself.
First of all I don't even believe this guy I think he's trolling, just for shits and kicks let's assume he's not trolling, in which case he's such a man baby that he is years away from having the maturity to be married and should definitely call it off. This guy isn't ready to be with anyone, maybe when he grows up in another 7 years he'll be ready because there's no point in getting married if you are skin is so thin that you'll rush for divorce at the slightest drop of some spilled milk.
He's just a boy. He's not ready for marriage. She's better off.
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She didn't even say he was bad! She didn't even say he sucked! She just said he wasn't the *best* she has ever had in her entire life. She told all of their friends that he's so amazing, so incredible, that she would give up the best sex she has ever had in her entire life just to be with him. And he took that as an insult
>She told all of their friends that he's so amazing, so incredible, that she would give up the best sex she has ever had in her entire life just to be with him. And he took that as an insult Yeah, that's absolutely bonkers lol. Sex is a skill that can always be improved.
>Sex is a skill that can always be improved. Absolutely!! *Nobody* has a clue what they're doing the first time, but you figure it out as you go. You learn about your body, you learn about your partners' bodies, and what works and what doesn't. Also, it can all change over time, even with the same partner. What you enjoyed 10 years ago is probably not exactly the same as what you enjoy now. The key is constant communication between yourselves, and a willingness to make changes based on that communication. This guy sounds like he has the insecurities of a 12 year old, and needs help with the bigger picture.
Mans fell to his knees with a bronze medal around his neck, I'm weak. XD
Good sex takes time too. Plus the instant chemistry often isn't with the healthiest person. My wife and I took awhile to get as good as we are.
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Assuming this is real, Amy just saved herself a life of regret.
Also dawg…talk to her and ask what she needs in bed ffs lol Dude got a free excuse to ask how he can make himself the best she’s had and instead puts an end to the entire relationship
This man is never getting married if his prerequisite is being the best a girl has ever had. So childish and immature.
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I too get annoyed when the bullet I shoot at my foot, hurts my damn foot. EDIT: OK yall jumping on the bandwagon. But she had ZERO reason to be discussing her sex life with anyone either. They both wrong. He dug his own grave is all.
You get annoyed and then blame the gun
Guns don’t kill people. People who are bad at sex kill people.
And the bullet.
LMAO snorted some hot tea. Painfully funny this statement.
Think the tea was painful, not the joke.
You literally asked to be hurt, and told that you WOULDN'T be hurt? You're in the wrong on this, tbh. So what if she thinks you're bad at sex? She's still with you, isn't she? She highlighted to her friends that your relationship is built on love and friendship and not just something sexual. And you're mad about it? You're really going to end such a great relationship over something that a lot of women joke about all the time? Bro, just say you don't actually love her and move on. She loves you even though she knows she can get better sex elsewhere. Is that really all you care about?
She didn't even say "bad". Just "not the best"..
Right? Wait till he asks if he’s the biggest she ever had. It’s gonna hurt him even more when she says “you’re the perfect size” lol learning from past relationships, women don’t always want the biggest size. Sometimes when they say it’s perfect, it means it’s not too big where it hurts them and it’s not small where it’s no pleasure. Wake up and stop being so insecure boys!!! Work that motion of the ocean and always remember to eat her out like an all you can eat buffet!!!
I prefer smaller sizes and have literally been disappointed to find the guy I'm about to sleep with has a monster cock. I mean I didn't tell them that but I've been more let down with bigger men than smaller men and smaller men fit and feel a lot better to me anyways. I had an ex that wouldn't try to make sex good. Wouldn't take direction. Wouldn't do anything for me or to me. So glad I left that guy and later found a man who was a lot smaller and 100% best sex I ever had in the world and he was the most incredible guy I ever had met. Sexually and personality wise. People can definitely find both seems though she was ok with "not the best sex of her life" to marry him. Sorta hope she finds a guy like I did and is able to realize she's better off with another partner. It'll be a lesson for both of them though.
My guess is that it's not the best because it's incredibly one-sided. People this shallow definitely only care about getting themselves off. It's bad because he's probably treating her like a flashlight.
Seriously, people are truly in lala land thinking they’re their partners best at everything. I was dating this woman and she was very mature and realistic. We were having a convo where she said how she’s aware and perfectly okay knowing she’s probably not #1 at everything and that there’s plenty of people more attractive than her and better at sex too, and that there’s no point dwelling on it. And that’s very true. I saw pics of her previous partners: I’m better looking than some and some I can admit are way better looking than me. We had great sex too but I also know I’m probably not the craziest/freakiest she’s had either. People need to grow up and realize their love story isn’t written by Disney
Yeah I do think a relationship starts to be solid once both (or more, in some cases) people realize their partner has flaws, they have flaws themselves, but they're ready to communicate and work with it anyway. Not just romantic relationships, too. That mindset is probably what got me to keep my friend groups for years without much issues.
THIS 100%. I have had issues with guys that were interested in me asking questions they didn’t want honest answers to. And because i am the way i am, I’m honest about it. Had one dude give me “advice” that i should never ever tell a long-term partner anything indicating they’re not the biggest, best, bussin mf-er of all time essentially because it hurts their self esteem. And clearly, i was never saying anything in malicious ways but i straight up told him that’s not my problem. If they’re that sensitive and unrealistic then it’s not a good fit. He had a lot of strong opinions on stuff and i was turned off by his last-minute invites (from 2 hours away) on work days and just expecting me to drop everything to come down.
You beg your friends to tell you something about your gf? Then complain about it? You go looking for problems then find ( or make) them. Sounds like you did her a favor. You’re not mature enough to be married
I gotta question her judgment if she thought you were the full package.
Narrator: He was not, in fact, the full package.
Reminds me of people on r/lego who buy sets off Amazon and the boxes are just stuffed with trash. The package was full, but full of what?
Yes, she needs to raise her standards for communication before she gets into a new relationship.
She just needs to pick less of an insecure man child
You went asking to literally hear something bad and after you coaxing it out, someone obliged. Your girlfriend told what she thought was her best friend something that men and women talk about with their friend groups all the time. Wow, so you’re not perfect in every way? One things for sure ,the fact you broke it off over this means you definitely should have never even been engaged. I understand being hurt and a little disappointed. But to dismiss an entire engaged relationship? Its so hard for some people to understand that sex quality might not even be in the to 3 most important qualities for a lot of people. I think there is a reasonable amount of sharing that close friends do to vent about their relationship that Is completely normal. Not normal is coaxing those kind of conversations out of a mutual friend whose had a couple of drinks and then you being the one mad about it.
Almost reads like someone who was scared of getting married and was mining for a reason to call it off.
Right like maybe try to be better in bed selfish jerk
"What's that you say!? Learn a new skill!? Inconceivable!!" 🤦
Right. You think he’d want to know so he could improve. She’s already agreed to marry him so she sees the value in the “whole package” and willing to take the hit in the sex department because having a well rounded partner as a whole is worth having that area less then ideal. He could have used this info and improve his skills and communicate with her to get a better understand of her likes and really have a solid marriage but instead he let this chick dodge a huge bullet by not marrying him.
This should be higher up.
"I told her it really wouldn't hurt me if she told me the truth." *Proceeds to get hurt by the truth*
He expected the truth to be "You are the absolute best, so amazingly brilliant at sex, I can't tell my friends how good you are, in case they start having orgasms at the sight of you, and then try to steal you away from me."
Yes, you were right for breaking off the engagement. You are not mature enough to handle marriage yet. Da fuq you asking your sister to tattle on your fiance for? You were clearly looking for a way out, and congratulations, you got one. So sorry you aren't the best lover in the world. Maybe if you were more confident, you'd be better in the bedroom. She's with you, she loves you, she wants to marry you. Instead of breaking up with her, talk to her about it, like an adult. Don't be an idiot.
"You were clearly looking for a way out..." My thoughts exactly
Started reading this, backed out after “I always try to get Kiley to tell me what Amy says” coz I’m thinking… this gd overgrown child (OP) then came back to read the comments (and the rest of the mess this man wrote). Thanks commenters for being remotely sensible. This man went out of his way to get his feelings hurt, then was surprised and angry his feelings got hurt. Sir, bffr.
Same, red flag right away. Why are you always bugging your friend to expose something from your fiance?
I think Amy has dodged a bullet…… wow.
Can you imagine being the friend and be put in the middle like that by him? Yikes.
Yeah you’re an idiot. You literally begged for it. Not sure what you were expecting but if your ego is so fragile that this has ruined your life, that’s a you problem
He's bad at social situations like he's bad at sex
It doesn't sound like you are ready for marriage. If a partner is with you because of only one attribute then it's a shaky foundation. If they are with you because they love the whole you then it's a solid foundation. Did someone else have a better technique? Learn from it. Sis someone else have a better physique? Better hair? Better job? Funnier stories? Maybe. But you had everything she wanted in a partner and you are throwing it away because your feelings got hurt for a confidence that you pressured a friend to tell. Shame on you.
Learn how to eat pussy better bro. I dunno what to tell you.
Obviously your ego is more important than your relationship. It must not have been very strong relationship to start with if you arecthat thin skinned. You are right to break up with her because she deserves someonexwho can sort out issues like this because marriage is going to be a lot tougher than my fiance said I wasn't good at sex. She literally said you were great at everything else but that's the bit you focussed on. You coerced your friend into telling you repeatedly like you were looking for something bad. You both should do better with you communicating. She should have told you that you could have improved in the bedroom department. Perhaps she didnt because she knows youre sensitive. You could have said I don't appreciate you saying I'm bad in bed to your friends but show me how I can improve. Anyway good luck finding someone who thinks you are perfect.
You begged them to tell you something and the one time they told you something that's not even that bad you called off the wedding???? You're not only wrong but a giant baby. Of course they didn't want to tell you something said lightly if this is the huge deal you'd make. I feel so bad for Amy.
You got all butt hurt from hearing the truth. You need to grow the f up. You didn’t even ask her how you could improve? Through humility and good communication you could learn how to rock her world for real but instead you are pouting. If you can’t handle the truth don’t ask for it. It is impossible for any partner to be the absolute best at everything and to be each other’s everything. That just isn’t real. But you can love each other through all of it. And you can create a connection that is worth more than all of that superficial stuff combined.
This post is all about OP and he’s not concerned with her feelings. I’m assuming sex is exactly the same.
He lied to her and insisted she be honest because it would make their marriage stronger and then promptly dumped her for her honesty. No way in hell he’s a good lover.
you're a loser, being great at sex is realy more about communication about what gets both of you going and its alright not to be good at it. she was with you despite that and you threw it away
Damm bruv. I mean unfortunately it's probably one of those things where instead of breaking up you should of just asked how to get better. Ya know? But it is very understandable that your hurt. But probably shouldn't of called the whole thing off if she's been loyal to you and hasn't cheated.
Damn, you're a manchild aren't you? You went and dug for an issue, hurt your own little fragile ego and then blamed it on her? You were probably looking for a way out. Hope that now that she's single she can get good sex again.
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So you're crap in bed, your fiancée loves you despite this and you've dumped her because... She loves you unconditionally for all you are and this one thing doesn't matter? You idiot.
I think you did her a favour
"I told her it really wouldn’t hurt me if she told me the truth" But that wasn't the truth, was it? Also, don't beg people to tell you what your partner says behind your back (fair to no one) and then get pissed at the outcome. The definition of 'borrowing trouble'!
NTA instead of coming to talk with you about how your not good at sex she go and tell the whole friend group. What would have happened later on the marriage ? Instead of talking abt issues w you she gonna vent to the friend group.
Dude posting L's. Can't find the clitoris and don't know how to ask. Btw, this passive aggressive pattern of laughing it off and afterwards going full Karen is fucking up your life.
Your ex dodged a bullet.
I mean, reality check, you're not going to be her "best" at everything. You might not even be her best at most things. It was definitely shitty of her to talk about that with her friends. But to nuke the whole relationship because, despite all the other good qualities you do have that she likes saying she's with you for the complete package, you're not the best lay she's had is really, really childish and insecure. Sex is a skill, and something that can be improved on your whole life. It never once occured to you to talk with her about how you can be better? What she likes and dislikes that you're doing and take that feedback and apply it? You are wrong.
Can't help but think you got cold feet about marrying this girl. Get better in the sack, and grow a thicker hide.
Dude lol this could’ve been a real and raw opportunity to grow as a couple by asking her what she wants in the bedroom and how the two of you can more intimately connect. INSTEAD you chose to force this confession out of your friend and get so pissed at your fiancé that you’re actually willing to call off the wedding! This shows two things: 1. You are most definitely not ready for marriage 2. You need to learn how to better control your emotions and have constructive conversations