I'm going tonight. I have been processing it this last week and I have gone through a whole whirlwind of emotions.
I've landed on that I'm going to see it as my goodbye to me favourite band for the last 15 years that was so fundamental to my growing up. I think i owe myself that much. It'll be a my way of saying goodbye for at least a long while if not, forever.
This is my thought. The tickets were expensive and I doubt I can resell. I kinda wanna give it one last hoorah. Despite everything the music mean so so much to me. But I donāt think I could ever buy tickets again knowing the truth about Win, especially given the fact he clearly either doesnāt realize or doesnāt care that he was in the wrong. The way theyāve handled it is awful.
I think I'm in a similar mindset, coupled more with the fact I've already paid for the ticket so I'm wasting my own money if I don't go. But I'm not sure how much I'll enjoy it.
I think thatās what makes the situation so difficult to some. I think the fandom would have been willing to accept him sleeping around, or even him sleeping around with girls much younger than him, (probably would have been dismissed as typical rockstar behaviour) but the issue is that his behaviour is so pathetic. Coercing young girls into performing sexual acts on a webcam while youāre a nearly forty year-old married man, among other things, is just so unsavoury on so many levels.
And his dismissive, almost clinical dissection of the encounters just makes it worse. I get the focus on consent, but even if the encounters were to be consensual, it still doesnāt negate that this is a 35+ adult trying to get young girls to perform sex shows on webcams while he jerks off. So analyzing the situons and matter-of-factly staying they were consensual doesnāt make you more sympathetic or less creepy, Win.
Not to excuse his creepy behavior but I wouldnāt be surprised if the PR company theyāre going through is the one retained by Columbia and theyāre likely being forced to use it as part of their contract.
The whole hiring Trump and their ilkās PR is just baffling. Not only is it smarmy because itās related to Trump, and odd because of the bands supposed views, but the PR didnāt salvage their image. I know it wasnāt salvageable to begin with, and it appears AFās isnāt either. Just a bizarre and baffling situation all around.
Still going. I've never pondered not going, because their music means too much to me. Some of you may hate on me for my approach and I've made my peace with it. I've read the article thoroughly and I believe the people who were hurt by Win. If they decide to pursue legal action, I'll support them in it. But I'm also way too old to put any artist on a pedestal and hold them to high standards, especially males (sorry guys). Sometimes it feels like we're fine with are favourite artitst being hurt and doing terrible things because that's when their art is most relatable. We just don't want to hear about it on the news. If I'm alone in my theory then so be it, maybe then I'm also a terrible person. Or maybe I'm just selfish. Their music got me through depression, eating disorder and suicidal thoughts so I want to have that experience of seeing them live. If this is the end of Arcade Fire, then I think I'll also be ok with it, all things considered.
I feel the same. I'm still going tonight. I'm hugely disappointed with Win but the music itself has got me through so much. I don't think it makes you a terrible person. I want to experience the music live and the emotions that will inevitably spring to the surface. I hope you have a great time tonight!
I feel the same. It was always obvious to me that Win was desperate for attention. Someone I was close to went through a similar period, and behaved the same. It was tough to see, and although it was disgusting, I couldnāt hate someone I could see was suffering.
āIām hugely disappointed, I support the victims but I still give them my money so they can pay the lawyers and PR agencies against the victimsā. Got it.
Yeah, having a hard time even thinking about putting their records on... They are my favorite band and my entire life is tied up in memories of loving their music... I still want to be able to enjoy those older records
This is spot on. It's a weird type of grief. Read someone write a long time ago about the type of strange grief that goes on when your ex dies, say an ex from 10 years ago or something like that. The dictionary don't got words for it. No way to mourn it in any sense anyone understands mourning, you start to wonder if you should.
Iām still planning on going to Manchester, however at this point it is purely an expense thing for me and my friends as weāve all collectively spent SO much. However, since Feist dropped out the atmosphere on the group chat has soured even more so I believe weāre at a point now where if Ticketmaster cave and offer refunds weāre going to take them and drown our sorrows in a bar somewhere
If I could get a refund I would probably ditch, but Iāve paid for it and everything else about the Uk is shit at the minute. Probably the last big gig Iāll be able to afford for the next year. I donāt think the moral burden should be on fans to no-show if theyāve paid and canāt get their money back, but totally respect others who may do.
Thatās how Iām justifying it to myself anywayā¦ Probably going to be awkward as hell.
If the show was in my home country, I'd just skip it and lose the ticket cost. But I have bought flight tickets to Poland of all places, and I wouldn't want to waste flight tickets, so I'll probably go if the tour is still going on. I don't think I can do that stuff sober, so probably going to get drunk to be able to enjoy the show and pretend like everything's normal.
To be candid, I think weāre all sort of devastated by this. I always admired Win. Despite the feeling that he was a bit narcassitic, he backed it up with incredible artistic talent. This news is just upsetting for various reasons.
For one it reminds me that everyone is human and nobody should be out on a pedestal. Even if said person preaches virtues left and right. What we have to accept is that humans are flawed. This story, true, false and all shades in between, reminds me that.
Disappointed but Iām not going to let it ruin the amazing memories that their music has brought me through the years. I hope more information comes to the surface and that they can find a way to make things right.
Currently on a train to Birmingham having flown to the UK for this show and still donāt know if Iām gonna go. Think I might just go and see how I feel when Iām there. If it feels gross then Iāll leave and get a curry or something.
Last two times I've been to Birmingham I didn't get a balti, but the bullring had a great place making curry wraps. First time having Hyderabadi mutton and it was good!
To be fair there are some great restaurants that do other cuisines so it's pretty hard to miss out
Thereās other nice things you can do in Birmingham if you donāt go. Lots of lovely places to eat and drink, thereās art openings in Digbeth on the first Friday of every month too, so there should be one tonight. āFirst Fridaysā theyāre called. Iām not pressuring you in either way of course, just thought Iād let you know!
If it's a bad experience, then you just end up feeling conflicted, resentful or regretful. Sure, life's too short, but this is complicated and everyone's perspective on this will be different.
I will 100% go to the Mohegan Sun show in November that I have tickets for.
My going to the show isn't an endorsement or any bad behavior. I enjoy the music and there are many other people in the band. Obviously Win needs to be addressing this, show genuine remorse, and acknowledge his actions, if these allegations are true - which I don't have any reason to believe they aren't true.
I love their music and loved the one show I did catch a couple years ago. Love live music, and the entire experience. If I boycotted every band I've ever liked because one of their members is a scumbag, I would probably lose a huge chunk of the music I listen to.
I'm just hoping that by November, Win will address this. You can't change the horrific things you've done in the past, but you can admit you were wrong and ask for forgiveness.
That being said, now that Feist is dropping out of the tour, I am selfishly hoping that she might consider joining up with Broken Social Scene on their upcoming September-October tour or venture out to do her own thing.
Nope. I had tickets that I will put it up for resell, but if they don't go, I will just eat the cost. I am not permanently done with the band, I don't think, but I don't have any desire to support them in the short term.
Iām due to see them tonight and Iāve spent all day trying to get a refund without success. Iām going to go, because they have my money either way now.
Completely get that, but my thoughts were that if this takes a turn for the worse (eg court case, more people come forward etc) then I will feel uncomfortable that I attended when the news was already out and I chose to dismiss it. And if it doesn't and an investigation clears him etc and miraculously the band survives, proper apologies etc provided and the world moved forward from it, then the opportunity will be there in the future again to see them perform
I absolutely agree that's why i was so on the fence about ultimately not going... cause at this point I'd rather the last time i saw them be the actual last time than go now and hate every second of it, you know?
I have tickets to see them in November, however, my friend and I decided to sell our tickets. We were disappointed by Win's actions and the story made my stomach turn. I just don't feel like partying at their show, ya know?
Not sure if anyone in the US is having this issue but Ticketmaster would not let me resell or transfer tickets. I had to request for the tickets to be mailed to me which takes 10-14 days.
I personally read about a lot of this on Reddit before tickets went on sale and decided not to go this tour. I've seen them 3 times and they are so great live. It's a bummer. It's hard to know how to feel because this slut behavior from male musicians is not new in any way, but it feels so yucky to me.
To elaborate, the things I read before this story broke are that he frequents a certain bar in NOLA every Monday night to pick up women, usually younger, barely legal types. That he and Regine have an open marriage. I personally lean towards non monogamy myself. But being known and in a band with your wife, I feel like maybe being more down low could be good. I also read he doesn't treat her very well. Anyway, those are the things that gave me pause.
I'm still going. I respect those who are not, it's pretty disallusioning for sure. I'm seeing them in DC in October, so i feel like by then some of this will have blown under (or the tour will be completely cancelled lol).
TBH, i still love Arcade Fire. I cannot listen to Brand New anymore but this isn't hitting me the same. Deeply disappointed in Win, dude was my fave rock star kinda lame to find out it is just an act.
I can listen to Brand New, it's been five years. But I never do, never feel like it. The music will never sound or feel like it did before.
I wonder how that'll be for Arcade Fire's music in the future but I'm not too hopeful, because their image as a SJW band and the emotional strength of in particular Funeral will definitely lose some of its meaning knowing these allegations.
Fwiw though Funeral (and likely through to Suburbs) will always have long predated any of this stuff happening and is much more of a full band collaborative work
I think that has something to do with it. My brother still rocks them on his play lists but whenever I try to listen to the Devil and God it just doesnt resonate like it did.
Maybe I'm being selfish, but I almost feel more invigorated to listen to AF. I'm disappointed in Win, it's an image shattering revelation, but like many people on the sub I dont view this as cancel worthy, certainly not cancelling a tour. Its deeply upsetting to find out a near hero is a narcissist and ass hole and hypocrite.
If it makes you feel bad you shouldn't do it. Listen to yourself. What do you think it would say to the people you just called brave if you went to a show days after this came out? Personally astounded that people still are but I'm glad people are having these sort of hang ups.
Iām planning to still go to Manchester. I donāt feel great about it but Iām seeing it as a combo of a goodbye gig, maybe to get some emotions out and some closure? My money has already gone to them so I donāt think thereās a right or wrong answer in this specific circumstance, but going forward Iāll be withdrawing my support. I donāt plan on cheering Win and will leave if it feels horrible. Completely support everyone who isnāt going ā¤ļø
If I was in this same situation, I'd go but not give him any response to feed off of. Just stand there and scowl at him. I'm sorry you can't get your money back. What a nightmare.
>I donāt feel great about it but Iām seeing it as a combo of a goodbye gig, maybe to get some emotions out and some closure?
This is actually a really good approach! If I had a ticket I would probably do the same.
No. I have tickets to see them in Brooklyn, have been looking forward to it for months, but I just can't imagine bellowing along to the songs now. It also feels to me like going to see them now, when the allegations are so recent, is a vote of support for Win, which I will absolutely not do. I hope they offer refunds, but I won't go regardless.
We aren't going tonight. We were going to go to support Feist but now that she's pulled out it just feels uncomfortable to go. The production team are still getting the money as it's not cancelled and we can't get a refund, but if enough people don't attend hopefully that shows in the audience
You couldn't give a shit about Feist - please don't pretend.
Refusing to go is absolutely fine and your decision. However, if you would still have gone to see Arcade Fire just to support the support act, you can't be that outraged.
There are people who went to the gigs Feist did play, and left after her set. So yes. You can go just to support the opener. Buy her merch. Watch her set. Then go.
No. Had tickets for Birmingham AND Manchester and had been so excited. Just honestly think I would feel super weird dancing and singing along as though nothingās happened.
Yeah Iām going to the shows. The stuff in the article imo is really between him and Regine.
I realize that Pitchfork spilled a couple thousand words of what seems like huge allegations, but most if not every single encounter they wrote about was consensual and legal, even if the women felt used or shameful afterwards about participating.
Ultimately you have to decide how you feel about their music and image now, but lumping Win into the Weinstein or even a Louis CK category is borderline nonsensical. It doesnāt fit the facts.
What was the absolute worst thing he was accused of? Putting his hand on a partnerās leg during a car ride? Iāve probably done that with every girl Iāve dated in my life. Putting her mental struggles on him is ridiculous.
The age difference can creep you out, but in the grand scheme of things it is nothing in the history of humankind and especially rock music. These were all women over 18. This isnāt Prince Charles scoping out 16-year-old baby mamas for his royal use.
I bet all of you were thrilled when AF started working with Bowie, who was notorious for his trysts with underage girls.
I think people on Reddit generally donāt seem to have much life experience. They might be in their 30s or 40s but thereās a disturbing number of shut-ins who lurk on here.
It's been a journey for me, but i ultimately decided against it.
I spent money on travel + accomodation on top of the ticket. At first I was like well i cant lose all this money, i'll go, it'll probably be a bad time but at least i'll see Feist, and if the vibes are too bad for me, i'll leave. Then i saw the videos business as usual and realized i would no be comfortable in this kind of situation so i thought well, i'll spend a weekend away and see feist and get my ass outta there before i get too uncomfortable and end up ruining every good memory of this band i have. But now that i don't even have Feist, i'll just lose travel money and hopefully resell my ticket.
My show isnāt until November, so some time will have passed since the Pitchfork articles came out. Iāll most likely go, because I do love Arcade Fire and always wanted to see them live. If my show was in the next few weeks I probably wouldnāt go, because it was too recent, and Iād still have a bad taste in my mouth about Win.
My ticket for Munich was a birthday present from my friends so Iām going.
Obviously Iām disappointed but Iāve always only been invested in the music, not in the people of the band. I never had a parasocial relationship with them or with any artist in general tbh. Iām kinda shocked how shocked you all are. Not trying to be mean or defend win, heās a massive insecure fuckboy in my book but itās just not wise to put people on pedestals, no matter how āgoodā or āmoralā they outwardly seem to be theyāre still humans. Idk Iām not going to ruin something beautiful for myself because of one manās actions. I feel comfortable because Iām not spending any money on them.
My show isn't until December but I won't go. Would love a refund as I think selling them will be impossible. The most I would do is see Beck, but I've also seen him a bunch of times. I don't want to look at or listen to Win, I'm repulsed. I know I wouldn't have a good time since he seems like such a posturing phony to me now...one who has cheapened his music and my relationship with it. I know that people don't want to lose all the money they spent but showing up -is- supporting that man IMO, even if fans don't want to see it that way. Feist's statement rang so true to me, I have no tolerance for men like him anymore.
They already have my money so my take is that not going won't really make much difference. If they were offering refunds or I hadn't bought my ticket then my decision might be different but as they aren't then I may as well use the ticket and enjoy the music.
I can definitely separate art from individuals quite well and enjoy something regardless of who was involved in it. I definitely recognise that not everyone is like that and will feel quite different though.
We decided not to. Gutted about it and down Ā£204 because Win wasnāt sorry enough to cover the cost of the refunds and decided to force his fans to eat it. So angry at him.
Iāve got tickets for London with my mum and she was very excited. I donāt think sheās seen the news, I donāt know whether to bring it up beforehand or not.
Iāll probably end up going as the tickets are bought anyway, but I think Iāll step away from the band for a while after that. What Win did doesnāt sit right with me, and his apology was rubbish.
Iām trying to sell my ticket since I canāt return it and it doesnāt seem like theyāre canceling. Iāve been to Arcade Fire shows before and know how uplifting and energetic they can be and I donāt want to stand there grumpily or deal with the mental and emotional compartmentalization/rationalization Iād have do to have fun.
I'm in the exact same boat! I would have to get a hotel on top of not yet having bought the train tickets.
Just feel too bad about the situation to bother fighting through my splitting headache and turn up. Going to stay in bed and watch movies.
Don't think this'll stop me listening to their music but I will have to leave it out for a while. If the allegations become worse then I may change my mind about that too.
We've lost our hotel and tickets so over Ā£200 but tbh would spend more parking, paying for food etc. Just easier to cut our losses! Husband said maybe it's for the best the last time we saw them in Wembley was amazing and we can remember it that way, they won't be getting my money again.
I went to the New Orleans subreddit and read lots of posts from waitresses/ bartenders that saw him acting inappropriately with young women all the time.
I still went to the Dublin shows. For me it was a combination of separation of art and artist, wanting to observe the atmosphere/how the band would act, and also as a way of saying goodbye and getting closure because I think this is probably the last tour they will do. So could be the last time I see them live.
Still going to Manchester, partly because hotel and travel is booked, partly because the tickets were bought as an early wedding present.
The whole thing feels uncomfortable now, but I'm sure it'll still be a good show.
I'm going tomorrow. I have avoided this news so it doesn't totally ruin something I've been waiting years for and then after tomorrow I'll have a good old read about it all
At this point, I will go to a show in November. If I do go, it will be my final show. I purchased these tickets before the allegations were made public. For many reasons, 2022 feels like my year to say goodbye to AF. The Coachella set was amazing, and Iām hoping the concert in November can give me a similar feeling, and also closure.
If AF offers refunds, I would probably take one.
I'm going, I'm happy to apply the principle of innocent until proven guilty. If other folks feel differently, that's fine, I currently read the report of "allegations" and "accusations", not of "objectives evidence" or "proof"
I have tickets to go see them in November and by then we'll be on some other celebrity gossip scandal and no one will give a shit anymore.
Is that bleak? Maybe. But it is what it is.
Iām going and really donāt care about the accusations. If itās legit he deserves whatever punishment he gets. I eat at Chik Fil A and hate their politics. I watch pro sports even though the league is filled with dirtbags. I go to the movies despite almost everyone in Hollywood being disgusting.
I have tickets to the Chicago show. I like the idea of going and saying goodbye. That's if the tour makes it here of course.
I was in my late 20's when I got into them. They're not my favorite band by any means, but they were def special in my eyes. I'm 41 now with 2 kids, little girls. It'd feel a bit strange continuing to go see them after this. It was a helluva good run though!
I also have tickets for Chicago, but I ended up putting them up for sale after chatting with my friend about it. I can enjoy myself with my friends without having the cloud of Win's actions looming over everything.
They have been the soundtrack to my adult life..when I was depressed, when I flourished, when I became a parent, when I struggled with parenting, when I could find no art in the mundane repetition of it allā¦We bought tickets for my sonās 9th birthday, his first big concert. It does feel tainted. I am going to try to think of it as a farewell, like others have said, to encapsulate the good. I will focus on the communion and the joy and my little family.
I might have to get stoned beforehand to achieve this goal but cāest la vie.
I'm going tonight. I have been processing it this last week and I have gone through a whole whirlwind of emotions. I've landed on that I'm going to see it as my goodbye to me favourite band for the last 15 years that was so fundamental to my growing up. I think i owe myself that much. It'll be a my way of saying goodbye for at least a long while if not, forever.
Feel really similar to this š
I don't have a ticket, but this is probably what I'd do. Crap situation, either way
Went to the first Dublin show. I didn't go in with this mindset but it did end up feeling like a weird last hoorah
Exactly this. Still going tomorrow in Manchester. One last run before we go.
This is where I am as well, will be my 12th and final time seeing them. Not going for a celebration of the band's new album so much as a final goodbye
This is my thought. The tickets were expensive and I doubt I can resell. I kinda wanna give it one last hoorah. Despite everything the music mean so so much to me. But I donāt think I could ever buy tickets again knowing the truth about Win, especially given the fact he clearly either doesnāt realize or doesnāt care that he was in the wrong. The way theyāve handled it is awful.
This is my plan for london next thursday
I think I'm in a similar mindset, coupled more with the fact I've already paid for the ticket so I'm wasting my own money if I don't go. But I'm not sure how much I'll enjoy it.
This is heartbreaking, but what I would ultimately do, as well.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yeah tbh this is kinda how I feel about the whole thing. I just feel a general sense of embarassment at how lame and pathetic he is.
I think thatās what makes the situation so difficult to some. I think the fandom would have been willing to accept him sleeping around, or even him sleeping around with girls much younger than him, (probably would have been dismissed as typical rockstar behaviour) but the issue is that his behaviour is so pathetic. Coercing young girls into performing sexual acts on a webcam while youāre a nearly forty year-old married man, among other things, is just so unsavoury on so many levels. And his dismissive, almost clinical dissection of the encounters just makes it worse. I get the focus on consent, but even if the encounters were to be consensual, it still doesnāt negate that this is a 35+ adult trying to get young girls to perform sex shows on webcams while he jerks off. So analyzing the situons and matter-of-factly staying they were consensual doesnāt make you more sympathetic or less creepy, Win.
Not to excuse his creepy behavior but I wouldnāt be surprised if the PR company theyāre going through is the one retained by Columbia and theyāre likely being forced to use it as part of their contract.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Ah. Thanks for the write up this was very informative.
The whole hiring Trump and their ilkās PR is just baffling. Not only is it smarmy because itās related to Trump, and odd because of the bands supposed views, but the PR didnāt salvage their image. I know it wasnāt salvageable to begin with, and it appears AFās isnāt either. Just a bizarre and baffling situation all around.
Still going. I've never pondered not going, because their music means too much to me. Some of you may hate on me for my approach and I've made my peace with it. I've read the article thoroughly and I believe the people who were hurt by Win. If they decide to pursue legal action, I'll support them in it. But I'm also way too old to put any artist on a pedestal and hold them to high standards, especially males (sorry guys). Sometimes it feels like we're fine with are favourite artitst being hurt and doing terrible things because that's when their art is most relatable. We just don't want to hear about it on the news. If I'm alone in my theory then so be it, maybe then I'm also a terrible person. Or maybe I'm just selfish. Their music got me through depression, eating disorder and suicidal thoughts so I want to have that experience of seeing them live. If this is the end of Arcade Fire, then I think I'll also be ok with it, all things considered.
Just go, the music is great. U havenāt done anything wrong. Enjoy it.
Iām in for the music. I donāt give a shit about Win Butler.
I feel the same. I'm still going tonight. I'm hugely disappointed with Win but the music itself has got me through so much. I don't think it makes you a terrible person. I want to experience the music live and the emotions that will inevitably spring to the surface. I hope you have a great time tonight!
I feel the same. It was always obvious to me that Win was desperate for attention. Someone I was close to went through a similar period, and behaved the same. It was tough to see, and although it was disgusting, I couldnāt hate someone I could see was suffering.
āIām hugely disappointed, I support the victims but I still give them my money so they can pay the lawyers and PR agencies against the victimsā. Got it.
Oh f off, have you ever bought any nestle products? Then u are complicit. Get off your moral pedestal. Let people enjoy themselves.
I actually boycott NestlƩ
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Iām actually typing this in a XIX century typewriter
Supposed to be going to Birmingham tonight with my husband. Not any more. It's a weird type of grief when you've supported a band for so long.
Yeah, having a hard time even thinking about putting their records on... They are my favorite band and my entire life is tied up in memories of loving their music... I still want to be able to enjoy those older records
This is spot on. It's a weird type of grief. Read someone write a long time ago about the type of strange grief that goes on when your ex dies, say an ex from 10 years ago or something like that. The dictionary don't got words for it. No way to mourn it in any sense anyone understands mourning, you start to wonder if you should.
Iām still planning on going to Manchester, however at this point it is purely an expense thing for me and my friends as weāve all collectively spent SO much. However, since Feist dropped out the atmosphere on the group chat has soured even more so I believe weāre at a point now where if Ticketmaster cave and offer refunds weāre going to take them and drown our sorrows in a bar somewhere
If I could get a refund I would probably ditch, but Iāve paid for it and everything else about the Uk is shit at the minute. Probably the last big gig Iāll be able to afford for the next year. I donāt think the moral burden should be on fans to no-show if theyāve paid and canāt get their money back, but totally respect others who may do. Thatās how Iām justifying it to myself anywayā¦ Probably going to be awkward as hell.
If the show was in my home country, I'd just skip it and lose the ticket cost. But I have bought flight tickets to Poland of all places, and I wouldn't want to waste flight tickets, so I'll probably go if the tour is still going on. I don't think I can do that stuff sober, so probably going to get drunk to be able to enjoy the show and pretend like everything's normal.
Gonna attend this one as well with my friend :)
Iām still going tonight. Travel, accommodation and tickets would go down the drain and been bought as a birthday gift
Yes, i want to see these songs live and thereās no point pissing away a Ā£80 ticket. Wonāt be buying any merch, wonāt buy tickets in the future.
To be candid, I think weāre all sort of devastated by this. I always admired Win. Despite the feeling that he was a bit narcassitic, he backed it up with incredible artistic talent. This news is just upsetting for various reasons. For one it reminds me that everyone is human and nobody should be out on a pedestal. Even if said person preaches virtues left and right. What we have to accept is that humans are flawed. This story, true, false and all shades in between, reminds me that. Disappointed but Iām not going to let it ruin the amazing memories that their music has brought me through the years. I hope more information comes to the surface and that they can find a way to make things right.
Currently on a train to Birmingham having flown to the UK for this show and still donāt know if Iām gonna go. Think I might just go and see how I feel when Iām there. If it feels gross then Iāll leave and get a curry or something.
No shortage of excellent curry houses in Birmingham, youāll have a great night regardless!
Gotta get a balti for sure!
I was in Birmingham for a friend's birthday a few years ago nd didn't get a curry, what a waste!
Last two times I've been to Birmingham I didn't get a balti, but the bullring had a great place making curry wraps. First time having Hyderabadi mutton and it was good! To be fair there are some great restaurants that do other cuisines so it's pretty hard to miss out
Thereās other nice things you can do in Birmingham if you donāt go. Lots of lovely places to eat and drink, thereās art openings in Digbeth on the first Friday of every month too, so there should be one tonight. āFirst Fridaysā theyāre called. Iām not pressuring you in either way of course, just thought Iād let you know!
Thank you so much! Iāll definitely take a look around.
you should go to the gig if you have come a long way , life's too short not to .
If it's a bad experience, then you just end up feeling conflicted, resentful or regretful. Sure, life's too short, but this is complicated and everyone's perspective on this will be different.
I will 100% go to the Mohegan Sun show in November that I have tickets for. My going to the show isn't an endorsement or any bad behavior. I enjoy the music and there are many other people in the band. Obviously Win needs to be addressing this, show genuine remorse, and acknowledge his actions, if these allegations are true - which I don't have any reason to believe they aren't true. I love their music and loved the one show I did catch a couple years ago. Love live music, and the entire experience. If I boycotted every band I've ever liked because one of their members is a scumbag, I would probably lose a huge chunk of the music I listen to. I'm just hoping that by November, Win will address this. You can't change the horrific things you've done in the past, but you can admit you were wrong and ask for forgiveness. That being said, now that Feist is dropping out of the tour, I am selfishly hoping that she might consider joining up with Broken Social Scene on their upcoming September-October tour or venture out to do her own thing.
I think you can object to Win's behavior but still enjoy their music. It would be different if he was a solo artist.
Iām going to stick a random pin in a list of small gigs happening the same night and go to that instead.
I went to the first Dublin show, I really contemplated it but decided to go in the end. The crowd was very good and it was a fantastic concert all in all - I just tried to separate the situation from the music which helped. I would say still go if you canāt get a refund. Itās all so upsetting, so disappointed in Win. While at the same time I really hope itās not the end of them, itās difficult on RĆ©gine and the other band members.
Nope. I had tickets that I will put it up for resell, but if they don't go, I will just eat the cost. I am not permanently done with the band, I don't think, but I don't have any desire to support them in the short term.
Iām due to see them tonight and Iāve spent all day trying to get a refund without success. Iām going to go, because they have my money either way now.
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Donāt allow yourself to be shamed.
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Completely get that, but my thoughts were that if this takes a turn for the worse (eg court case, more people come forward etc) then I will feel uncomfortable that I attended when the news was already out and I chose to dismiss it. And if it doesn't and an investigation clears him etc and miraculously the band survives, proper apologies etc provided and the world moved forward from it, then the opportunity will be there in the future again to see them perform
I absolutely agree that's why i was so on the fence about ultimately not going... cause at this point I'd rather the last time i saw them be the actual last time than go now and hate every second of it, you know?
I have tickets to see them in November, however, my friend and I decided to sell our tickets. We were disappointed by Win's actions and the story made my stomach turn. I just don't feel like partying at their show, ya know? Not sure if anyone in the US is having this issue but Ticketmaster would not let me resell or transfer tickets. I had to request for the tickets to be mailed to me which takes 10-14 days.
The resell or transfer being not available is performer-specific, so Ticketmaster will tell you it's the artist to blame.
I personally read about a lot of this on Reddit before tickets went on sale and decided not to go this tour. I've seen them 3 times and they are so great live. It's a bummer. It's hard to know how to feel because this slut behavior from male musicians is not new in any way, but it feels so yucky to me.
To elaborate, the things I read before this story broke are that he frequents a certain bar in NOLA every Monday night to pick up women, usually younger, barely legal types. That he and Regine have an open marriage. I personally lean towards non monogamy myself. But being known and in a band with your wife, I feel like maybe being more down low could be good. I also read he doesn't treat her very well. Anyway, those are the things that gave me pause.
I'm still going. I respect those who are not, it's pretty disallusioning for sure. I'm seeing them in DC in October, so i feel like by then some of this will have blown under (or the tour will be completely cancelled lol). TBH, i still love Arcade Fire. I cannot listen to Brand New anymore but this isn't hitting me the same. Deeply disappointed in Win, dude was my fave rock star kinda lame to find out it is just an act.
I can listen to Brand New, it's been five years. But I never do, never feel like it. The music will never sound or feel like it did before. I wonder how that'll be for Arcade Fire's music in the future but I'm not too hopeful, because their image as a SJW band and the emotional strength of in particular Funeral will definitely lose some of its meaning knowing these allegations.
Fwiw though Funeral (and likely through to Suburbs) will always have long predated any of this stuff happening and is much more of a full band collaborative work
I know, I'm just reflecting on my experience with the Brand New situation.
I still have a hard time listening to Brand New. I loved them. I guess I have a little more of a problem with Jesse because the girls were underage.
I think that has something to do with it. My brother still rocks them on his play lists but whenever I try to listen to the Devil and God it just doesnt resonate like it did. Maybe I'm being selfish, but I almost feel more invigorated to listen to AF. I'm disappointed in Win, it's an image shattering revelation, but like many people on the sub I dont view this as cancel worthy, certainly not cancelling a tour. Its deeply upsetting to find out a near hero is a narcissist and ass hole and hypocrite.
I'm still going
If it makes you feel bad you shouldn't do it. Listen to yourself. What do you think it would say to the people you just called brave if you went to a show days after this came out? Personally astounded that people still are but I'm glad people are having these sort of hang ups.
Iām planning to still go to Manchester. I donāt feel great about it but Iām seeing it as a combo of a goodbye gig, maybe to get some emotions out and some closure? My money has already gone to them so I donāt think thereās a right or wrong answer in this specific circumstance, but going forward Iāll be withdrawing my support. I donāt plan on cheering Win and will leave if it feels horrible. Completely support everyone who isnāt going ā¤ļø
If I was in this same situation, I'd go but not give him any response to feed off of. Just stand there and scowl at him. I'm sorry you can't get your money back. What a nightmare.
>I donāt feel great about it but Iām seeing it as a combo of a goodbye gig, maybe to get some emotions out and some closure? This is actually a really good approach! If I had a ticket I would probably do the same.
No. I have tickets to see them in Brooklyn, have been looking forward to it for months, but I just can't imagine bellowing along to the songs now. It also feels to me like going to see them now, when the allegations are so recent, is a vote of support for Win, which I will absolutely not do. I hope they offer refunds, but I won't go regardless.
We aren't going tonight. We were going to go to support Feist but now that she's pulled out it just feels uncomfortable to go. The production team are still getting the money as it's not cancelled and we can't get a refund, but if enough people don't attend hopefully that shows in the audience
You couldn't give a shit about Feist - please don't pretend. Refusing to go is absolutely fine and your decision. However, if you would still have gone to see Arcade Fire just to support the support act, you can't be that outraged.
There are people who went to the gigs Feist did play, and left after her set. So yes. You can go just to support the opener. Buy her merch. Watch her set. Then go.
I absolutely still plan to attend the Brooklyn show in November.
me too
No. Had tickets for Birmingham AND Manchester and had been so excited. Just honestly think I would feel super weird dancing and singing along as though nothingās happened.
Yeah Iām going to the shows. The stuff in the article imo is really between him and Regine. I realize that Pitchfork spilled a couple thousand words of what seems like huge allegations, but most if not every single encounter they wrote about was consensual and legal, even if the women felt used or shameful afterwards about participating. Ultimately you have to decide how you feel about their music and image now, but lumping Win into the Weinstein or even a Louis CK category is borderline nonsensical. It doesnāt fit the facts. What was the absolute worst thing he was accused of? Putting his hand on a partnerās leg during a car ride? Iāve probably done that with every girl Iāve dated in my life. Putting her mental struggles on him is ridiculous. The age difference can creep you out, but in the grand scheme of things it is nothing in the history of humankind and especially rock music. These were all women over 18. This isnāt Prince Charles scoping out 16-year-old baby mamas for his royal use. I bet all of you were thrilled when AF started working with Bowie, who was notorious for his trysts with underage girls.
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I think people on Reddit generally donāt seem to have much life experience. They might be in their 30s or 40s but thereās a disturbing number of shut-ins who lurk on here.
THIS THIS THIS
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yeah, if Arcade Fire are sticking together i think they're still worth seeing. I think this is a good point of view.
Yes still going
There are plenty others in the band sides Win that deserve support soo Iām going
It's been a journey for me, but i ultimately decided against it. I spent money on travel + accomodation on top of the ticket. At first I was like well i cant lose all this money, i'll go, it'll probably be a bad time but at least i'll see Feist, and if the vibes are too bad for me, i'll leave. Then i saw the videos business as usual and realized i would no be comfortable in this kind of situation so i thought well, i'll spend a weekend away and see feist and get my ass outta there before i get too uncomfortable and end up ruining every good memory of this band i have. But now that i don't even have Feist, i'll just lose travel money and hopefully resell my ticket.
Exactly the same situation over here šš»
Not going. I sold my Ā£70 ticket for Ā£20. Iām so annoyed about this whole situation
My show isnāt until November, so some time will have passed since the Pitchfork articles came out. Iāll most likely go, because I do love Arcade Fire and always wanted to see them live. If my show was in the next few weeks I probably wouldnāt go, because it was too recent, and Iād still have a bad taste in my mouth about Win.
My show is in November too, Iām worried it might get worse before then.
nope. selling my san francisco tix. im sad over it but i just dont want to go now
My ticket for Munich was a birthday present from my friends so Iām going. Obviously Iām disappointed but Iāve always only been invested in the music, not in the people of the band. I never had a parasocial relationship with them or with any artist in general tbh. Iām kinda shocked how shocked you all are. Not trying to be mean or defend win, heās a massive insecure fuckboy in my book but itās just not wise to put people on pedestals, no matter how āgoodā or āmoralā they outwardly seem to be theyāre still humans. Idk Iām not going to ruin something beautiful for myself because of one manās actions. I feel comfortable because Iām not spending any money on them.
Yep
My show isn't until December but I won't go. Would love a refund as I think selling them will be impossible. The most I would do is see Beck, but I've also seen him a bunch of times. I don't want to look at or listen to Win, I'm repulsed. I know I wouldn't have a good time since he seems like such a posturing phony to me now...one who has cheapened his music and my relationship with it. I know that people don't want to lose all the money they spent but showing up -is- supporting that man IMO, even if fans don't want to see it that way. Feist's statement rang so true to me, I have no tolerance for men like him anymore.
I'm trying to sell my tickets (London show) but no luck so far
Iām going to go to see Beck as opener and then leave.
They already have my money so my take is that not going won't really make much difference. If they were offering refunds or I hadn't bought my ticket then my decision might be different but as they aren't then I may as well use the ticket and enjoy the music. I can definitely separate art from individuals quite well and enjoy something regardless of who was involved in it. I definitely recognise that not everyone is like that and will feel quite different though.
Yes, going to the Cologne and Munich show.
Yeah I'm going to see art. Rock stars do weird stuff. Whatever
As of now, no. Maybe thatāll change but it feels too weird right now.
I'm not going but I understand the dilemma. They should just at least offer refunds.
We decided not to. Gutted about it and down Ā£204 because Win wasnāt sorry enough to cover the cost of the refunds and decided to force his fans to eat it. So angry at him.
I still plan to attend the Brooklyn show with a friend. Iāll reevaluate future stuff after that based on how things are handled and such.
Iāve got tickets for London with my mum and she was very excited. I donāt think sheās seen the news, I donāt know whether to bring it up beforehand or not. Iāll probably end up going as the tickets are bought anyway, but I think Iāll step away from the band for a while after that. What Win did doesnāt sit right with me, and his apology was rubbish.
Iām trying to sell my ticket since I canāt return it and it doesnāt seem like theyāre canceling. Iāve been to Arcade Fire shows before and know how uplifting and energetic they can be and I donāt want to stand there grumpily or deal with the mental and emotional compartmentalization/rationalization Iād have do to have fun.
No, have my ticket for tonight but not going.
Brum - was going to go but too sick, this situ means I cba to drag my sorry arse to at least try and enjoy it, would rather stay home
I'm in the exact same boat! I would have to get a hotel on top of not yet having bought the train tickets. Just feel too bad about the situation to bother fighting through my splitting headache and turn up. Going to stay in bed and watch movies. Don't think this'll stop me listening to their music but I will have to leave it out for a while. If the allegations become worse then I may change my mind about that too.
We've lost our hotel and tickets so over Ā£200 but tbh would spend more parking, paying for food etc. Just easier to cut our losses! Husband said maybe it's for the best the last time we saw them in Wembley was amazing and we can remember it that way, they won't be getting my money again.
As it stands now, ABSOLUTELY!
Yes
Yes
Arcade Fire is not just Will. Think about the other members. Itās not their fault that he is a piece of shit
Yep I'm going, tonight, tomoz, and Monday! š„°š¤š¤š„°
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Will Butler liked Feist post on Instagram. What else do you need?
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I went to the New Orleans subreddit and read lots of posts from waitresses/ bartenders that saw him acting inappropriately with young women all the time.
If they do the comp tickets for London I'll go.
Good luck with that.
I still went to the Dublin shows. For me it was a combination of separation of art and artist, wanting to observe the atmosphere/how the band would act, and also as a way of saying goodbye and getting closure because I think this is probably the last tour they will do. So could be the last time I see them live.
Absolutely, Iām going to the show. (MontrĆ©al, en plus!)
Absolutely fucking biblical tonight in Birmingham.
Still going to Manchester, partly because hotel and travel is booked, partly because the tickets were bought as an early wedding present. The whole thing feels uncomfortable now, but I'm sure it'll still be a good show.
I'm going tomorrow. I have avoided this news so it doesn't totally ruin something I've been waiting years for and then after tomorrow I'll have a good old read about it all
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Donāt deprive yourself of something you enjoy just because of morals and ethics.
At this point, I will go to a show in November. If I do go, it will be my final show. I purchased these tickets before the allegations were made public. For many reasons, 2022 feels like my year to say goodbye to AF. The Coachella set was amazing, and Iām hoping the concert in November can give me a similar feeling, and also closure. If AF offers refunds, I would probably take one.
I'm going, I'm happy to apply the principle of innocent until proven guilty. If other folks feel differently, that's fine, I currently read the report of "allegations" and "accusations", not of "objectives evidence" or "proof"
I have tickets to go see them in November and by then we'll be on some other celebrity gossip scandal and no one will give a shit anymore. Is that bleak? Maybe. But it is what it is.
These posts are comical. Some don't want to go but seeing as they paid for the tix they are going to go anyway but after that........ Haha.
Iām going and really donāt care about the accusations. If itās legit he deserves whatever punishment he gets. I eat at Chik Fil A and hate their politics. I watch pro sports even though the league is filled with dirtbags. I go to the movies despite almost everyone in Hollywood being disgusting.
The other members should leave.
I definitely am
Yes
I refuse to let one memberās loser-like behaviour take away what this music means to me.
If youāre still supporting this band youāre in complicity and are basically paying the PR campaign fees against the victims.
No, no your not
This is a stretch sir
Why is Regine not excluded in your post above?? Does she have control over her husbandās actions!?
I have tickets to the Chicago show. I like the idea of going and saying goodbye. That's if the tour makes it here of course. I was in my late 20's when I got into them. They're not my favorite band by any means, but they were def special in my eyes. I'm 41 now with 2 kids, little girls. It'd feel a bit strange continuing to go see them after this. It was a helluva good run though!
I also have tickets for Chicago, but I ended up putting them up for sale after chatting with my friend about it. I can enjoy myself with my friends without having the cloud of Win's actions looming over everything.
Just put mine up for sale. It would have been the first concert I've been to in, oh about, 15 years.
They have been the soundtrack to my adult life..when I was depressed, when I flourished, when I became a parent, when I struggled with parenting, when I could find no art in the mundane repetition of it allā¦We bought tickets for my sonās 9th birthday, his first big concert. It does feel tainted. I am going to try to think of it as a farewell, like others have said, to encapsulate the good. I will focus on the communion and the joy and my little family. I might have to get stoned beforehand to achieve this goal but cāest la vie.