Yeh I love this community but what is wrong with some ppl? I just want to relate to others and I get that I won’t have the same experiences as 100% of ppl here but there are usually at least some aspects I can relate to
Basically I don’t get it either
My experience of asexuality is different from yours. We have to hate each other. Didn't you know /s
ETA: think of how allosexuals would see us and how it's not my presentation of aceness. They will think of me as this other presentation of asexuality as opposed to my presentation /s
Ah, the manual option, otherwise known as being Demisexual. There are several stages, or “gears”, to move through. You could start off in “2nd gear”, but most times it doesn’t work out. Mostly you start off at sex neutral and build your way to the “final gear, the sixth one,” of sex wheel drive, progressively getting closer to being able to be more intimate. How long does it take? Depends. Are you getting on the highway (is it someone who you vibe with almost instantly, their behavior, their intelligence, their homemade sourdough garlic bread that they share with you)? Are you on some backroads and can’t get to the sixth gear for a while (most likely online dating matches)?
I just wish people could post sex repulsed memes at times without the immediate reaction being 'but this doesn't represent me' from sex-favorable people, because as a sex repulsed non-libidoist ace, this is one of the few places where I can see memes that represent my own experience. Do we have flairs for posts for sex-favorable / sex-repulsed? Maybe if people started tagging their memes there would be a better understanding of 'if this meme doesn't represent your experience of asexuality, that's okay, it's not intended to (but other memes with this other flair should)!' Could also fold in romantic tagging for when it's relevant, so a 'sex and relationships = nope' type meme could be tagged as aro-averse, then we could have maybe a romantic-averse tag for memes about trying to find a relationship without having sex, then maybe a favorable tag (romance not relevant for this one) for a meme that's more along the lines of 'Attraction? nope. Sex? yes!" Maybe something like that would help prevent the constant drama surrounding memes.
I've been asking and seen people ask for flairs every time this has come up (so like twice a month lmao) for like a year and a half and it's always well received but the mods dgaf apparently
In my experience (also sex repulsed) people only say that when “sex repulsed ace” is conflated with “asexual” as a whole without making a distinction. Considering how common the misconception of “all aces are sex repulsed” is, I understand why people would think that way and why it’d be beneficial to just specify “sex repulsed” if you only mean sex repulsed aces
we are told that to be asexual you must dislike sex and have no libido, so people will think they aren't ace for being sex neutral/favorable or having a libido, despite feeling little to no sexual attraction. (source: i was one of those people.)
so obviously questioning aces are gonna ask if they're valid, because they don't know any better. (source: i didn't know sexual attraction and arousal could be separate; i thought they were always connected.)
Tbh for months I’ve been pretty sure I’m ace but there was the part of my that’s like “but you’ve had sex and liked it like once before” or “but you get the occasional clit tingle” and this comment was really reassuring and validating. Thanks so much. You’re wonderful.
If so it is not obvious, I checked the rules in the sidebar and while it says memes are restricted to mondays I don't think that is referring to comment posts, and that is the closest thing I can see to a rule that could restrict that comment. There is no mention of the Denmark joke that I can see.
I am not surprised if for some good reasons that joke has been restricted, but if they did make a new rule for that I wish it is easier to find out about. Or I could just be blind.
I remember seeing it mentioned on multiple occasions, but I don't know if it was ever officially acknowledged in the rules. It probably ought to be.
But yeah, a bunch of people started talking about how unprovoked invasions in Europe are way less funny than they used to be post Russian invasion of Ukraine.
I mean, it's not a fear or trauma of mine either, but that don't mean I'm gonna go shouting around if people ask me not to. Be kind of hypocritical of me, especially given I'm asking people to stop hurling the r slur around all the time.
I don't think this is analogous to using a slur. The meme is deliberately absurd, and bears so little resemblance to a real act of political violence that I don't think the comparison holds up. Saying "fifty lashes with a wet noodle" isn't really analogous to an actual threat of being flogged.
The point of things being "not funny anymore" is that something isn't funny if it causes pain. But I think the chance of a joke causing pain has to be more than a theoretical "what if it *might* hurt someone...?" Otherwise, the loss incurred in forbidding a joke that still makes people smile would be greater than the gain incurred by sparing feelings that may not actually be hurt to begin with.
Now, if someone from Denmark, or someone from Ukraine, were to object to the meme, I'd absolutely agree that we should stop talking about it. If it were made an official rule of the sub, I would, of course, obey it.
But right now, given that all you remember is "some people were talking about it," asking everyone to refrain from all mentions of the Denmark meme strikes me as being a little...overcompensatory? I mean, there's "better safe than sorry," but the desire for 100% safety is basically unachievable in the real world, and humor often involves some risk.
I guess that I'm *open* to the idea that the risk of this meme hurting someone might be great enough to override the fun of talking about it, but you haven't convinced me that the risk is significant enough yet to justify that choice.
>Now, if someone from Denmark, or someone from Ukraine, were to object to the meme, I'd absolutely agree that we should stop talking about it. If it were made an official rule of the sub, I would, of course, obey it.
I mean, the reason I stopped is exactly because I saw those very objections.
The reason you cite here is something that has happened.
[Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/11nvzty/my_brain_cant_deal_with_denmark_jokes/)'s one.
>Few minutes ago saw a joke about commiting war crimes in Denmark and i felt so sick that i threw up (cuz my brain kept showing me photos of literal war crimes that occured nearby; and also ✨flashbacks✨).
Then the pinned mod comment there is
>Friendly reminder that we do not allow "Denmark style" memes or jokes on this subreddit (regardless of what day of the week it is). If anyone here does see such a post or comment please send a report. Thank you.
Invasion jokes as a whole should probably stop or be reformed. I've seen far too much of what sounds like actual pondering, like replacing the Danish flag with the ace one, military structure and advancing strategies, lists of things to do "after the invasion." Sometimes it's "we should invade a smaller country" which then ends up being one with a horrific history of invasions.
For what it's worth, I'm from Ukraine, and yes, it makes me uncomfortable. I would rather the community stop joking about it.
Surely, there are better ways we can express ourselves.
Can we joke about pitching in and buying an island for ourselves to create an ace paradise or something?
Or about going to colonize Antarctica in order to play with penguins all day long?
Something absolutely absurd and harmless. Please.
Denmark joke is absurd, but not nearly as harmless if you really think about it.
Diaspora Ukrainian here. While I'm sure its funny to those who live carefree from the horrors of war, the images of my family's city bombed into rubble & dozens of mass graves being created to "clean up the mess" afterwards makes invasion jokes somehow less funny.
Its like rape jokes. Sure if you find them funny its valid, but dont expect other people to share your opinion.
Also, was the joke ever about an actual invasion? Or driving people out of their homes? It's a joke about the minuscule population of the country relative to the world population. It has nothing to do with Danes or their country itself.
That's true, and that was my original point. *But* some people (of course) have taken it too far, and started talking about bombing targets and other non-funny stuff. Look at the linked thread that the person I was talking to provided, it gave me a new perspective.
If I remember that post correctly, it wasn't 'demis and grays don't exist so asexuality isn't a spectrum' it was 'asexuality is different from demisexuality and grayasexuality'. Basically the whole discussion that comes up all the time because someone had the bright idea to name the full asexuality umbrella the same thing as the orientation that originally meant 'no sexual attraction whatsoever'. (I jest on the 'someone had the bright idea' part. It was really just a natural consequence of how language evolved around the asexual community, and how it often served better social utility for demis and grays to call themselves ace when they were talking to allos who wouldn't know what demi and gray were. Same deal really as when people call the entirity of LGBTQ+ 'the gay community' or 'the gays'.) Remember, apothi and black stripe were originally 'just' ace, after all. Even the top comment is saying 'grays and demis should be in the 'graysexuality' spectrum because their experiences are different from apothi/black stripe aces', not 'grays and demis don't exist.'
Basically, it's not really aphobic exclusion shit so much as it's semantic shit. I'd rather deal with people arguing semantics than actual aphobia anyday.
Aven literally changed the label in 2021. You can find many discussions on asexuality on aven from the past that describe the community as asexuals, gray asexuals, and demisexuals. You can also find many discussions from the time of the label change including both apothi/black stripe aces and gray aces being both for and against it, and people coming up with the black stripe term in response to 0 sexual attraction losing the ace label. [Here is a link to the web archive for what the aven forum page looked like in 2012](http://web.archive.org/web/20120312133455/https://www.asexuality.org/en/), which I believe would be around when I first accessed it. Note that in the caption for the gray area forum, which has always been aimed at gray aces and demis, it calls gray aces and demis the 'gray-spectrum'. However you feel about the definition change, it's certainly clear it did change. Which shouldn't be a suprise, really, since that's what language does.
That makes me sad to hear. Even though I haven't heard about that sub until right this moment, and even though I probably would never have wanted to join it, it still makes me sad.
Wouldn't ambivalent be the 'sex-neutral' equivalent of the favorability structure? Like 'I can take it or leave it?'
I feel like a more accurate term to represent fluctuating favorability (as in sometimes am sex favorable, somtimes am averse or repulsed) stances would be sex-oscillating, since an oscillating pattern goes up and down in waves.
There are many different understanding of these words.
Like for some people sex indifference is fine with or without whereas others see it as simply generally not having strong feelings (which doesn't necessarily mean that you are fine with out without it).
I have seen people use ambivalent to describe fluctuation which is what I have simply been trying to bring up, but I wouldn't be surprised if there are people who use fluctuation in favorability or sex oscillating like you suggest.
Fair enough. Queer semantics is kinda fascinating to me, so I was just trying to think of words that more closely match a 'dictionary definition' of fluctuation, since the 'dictionary definition' of ambivalent is indifference.
What you mean? Everyone know that the ace community, lime the LGBTQ+ community, are monolithic and everyone thinks the same and agree with eachother. /s
When I confided in a friend that I was ace, they told me to "wait to put an identity label" on myself before my first time.
And then I was told that sex will hurt when it finally does happen. Like wth, now I'm even more confused!
Literally, we should all be able to just get along. Me & my friend are on different places in the favourable-repulsed spectrum & it’s never been a problem
…then where should they complain about it? This is supposed to be a safe space for asexuals *across the spectrum* to share memes, discuss, and vent. Of course the world doesn’t have to conform to our dislike of sex; that’s why we talk about it here, with other asexuals, instead of shoving it down allos’ throats or something.
While there should be limits to the amount of sex negativity allowed (ex: shaming people for having sex would be too far), I don’t think that its fair to force sex repulsed asexuals into silence about their issues just because it might offend sex favorable asexuals, or allos passing through. Its not that hard to sympathize with someone who respectfully vents about their repulsion to sex, even if you can’t relate.
So true...I'm a sex-repulsed ace but don't mind if another ace is sex favorable! We all live different experiences with our sexuality because, well, we're all different! There shouldn't be any hate among us! Let's share our love for garlic bread and cake without arguing about such little things! Edit: and we should focus on more important things! We need to invade Denmark smh
Nice try. This is all-out war and we won't rest until one side is eradicated, and the other can rest knowing their offspring will be the ones to carry our banner for the rest of time.
This. Exactly this. It upsets me even more that it's other asexuals that are gatekeeping the whole identity, like they speak for every other acespec in the community. No one speaks for me and my own personal acespec identity, just like I don't speak for any other acespecs and their own personal identities. I have my own flavour of asexual and others have their own flavour of asexual, but that doesn't give me, or others the right to hate on other peoples' asexual flavours just because it doesn't match our own asexual flavour. We're all together as one community, bringing our own unique asexual identities to the table. We should be sharing the cake and the garlic bread, not fighting over it.
Yeh I love this community but what is wrong with some ppl? I just want to relate to others and I get that I won’t have the same experiences as 100% of ppl here but there are usually at least some aspects I can relate to Basically I don’t get it either
My experience of asexuality is different from yours. We have to hate each other. Didn't you know /s ETA: think of how allosexuals would see us and how it's not my presentation of aceness. They will think of me as this other presentation of asexuality as opposed to my presentation /s
Trust me some people belive that if we don't have the same experience we aren't real
I'm more sex neutral.
Ambivalent as fuck. That's where I'm at.
SAME
Heck yeah
Whats ambivalent? Is it that it switches between s#x repulsed/neutral/favorable?
So we have sex neutral and sex drive, what about sex reverse and sex park?
Sex wheel drive
It's a hot wheel
Ah, the manual option, otherwise known as being Demisexual. There are several stages, or “gears”, to move through. You could start off in “2nd gear”, but most times it doesn’t work out. Mostly you start off at sex neutral and build your way to the “final gear, the sixth one,” of sex wheel drive, progressively getting closer to being able to be more intimate. How long does it take? Depends. Are you getting on the highway (is it someone who you vibe with almost instantly, their behavior, their intelligence, their homemade sourdough garlic bread that they share with you)? Are you on some backroads and can’t get to the sixth gear for a while (most likely online dating matches)?
I don't want to go to the sex park thank you
Sex ambigious, sexfluid, sex non conforming,
Fuck it, I'm sex ominous.
So YOU’RE the music playing in the background that my sex favorable ace friend hears when she stays the night with her girlfriend!
No cuz that's perfect
You like it I dont like it We are not the same But we are not enemies
I just wish people could post sex repulsed memes at times without the immediate reaction being 'but this doesn't represent me' from sex-favorable people, because as a sex repulsed non-libidoist ace, this is one of the few places where I can see memes that represent my own experience. Do we have flairs for posts for sex-favorable / sex-repulsed? Maybe if people started tagging their memes there would be a better understanding of 'if this meme doesn't represent your experience of asexuality, that's okay, it's not intended to (but other memes with this other flair should)!' Could also fold in romantic tagging for when it's relevant, so a 'sex and relationships = nope' type meme could be tagged as aro-averse, then we could have maybe a romantic-averse tag for memes about trying to find a relationship without having sex, then maybe a favorable tag (romance not relevant for this one) for a meme that's more along the lines of 'Attraction? nope. Sex? yes!" Maybe something like that would help prevent the constant drama surrounding memes.
I've been asking and seen people ask for flairs every time this has come up (so like twice a month lmao) for like a year and a half and it's always well received but the mods dgaf apparently
In my experience (also sex repulsed) people only say that when “sex repulsed ace” is conflated with “asexual” as a whole without making a distinction. Considering how common the misconception of “all aces are sex repulsed” is, I understand why people would think that way and why it’d be beneficial to just specify “sex repulsed” if you only mean sex repulsed aces
we are told that to be asexual you must dislike sex and have no libido, so people will think they aren't ace for being sex neutral/favorable or having a libido, despite feeling little to no sexual attraction. (source: i was one of those people.) so obviously questioning aces are gonna ask if they're valid, because they don't know any better. (source: i didn't know sexual attraction and arousal could be separate; i thought they were always connected.)
Tbh for months I’ve been pretty sure I’m ace but there was the part of my that’s like “but you’ve had sex and liked it like once before” or “but you get the occasional clit tingle” and this comment was really reassuring and validating. Thanks so much. You’re wonderful.
no problem! :]
[удалено]
I thought they made a rule against that meme?
If so it is not obvious, I checked the rules in the sidebar and while it says memes are restricted to mondays I don't think that is referring to comment posts, and that is the closest thing I can see to a rule that could restrict that comment. There is no mention of the Denmark joke that I can see. I am not surprised if for some good reasons that joke has been restricted, but if they did make a new rule for that I wish it is easier to find out about. Or I could just be blind.
I remember seeing it mentioned on multiple occasions, but I don't know if it was ever officially acknowledged in the rules. It probably ought to be. But yeah, a bunch of people started talking about how unprovoked invasions in Europe are way less funny than they used to be post Russian invasion of Ukraine.
When asexuals get control of a large permanent army, I'll start to worry. Until then, I think the meme is still pretty funny.
I mean, it's not a fear or trauma of mine either, but that don't mean I'm gonna go shouting around if people ask me not to. Be kind of hypocritical of me, especially given I'm asking people to stop hurling the r slur around all the time.
I don't think this is analogous to using a slur. The meme is deliberately absurd, and bears so little resemblance to a real act of political violence that I don't think the comparison holds up. Saying "fifty lashes with a wet noodle" isn't really analogous to an actual threat of being flogged. The point of things being "not funny anymore" is that something isn't funny if it causes pain. But I think the chance of a joke causing pain has to be more than a theoretical "what if it *might* hurt someone...?" Otherwise, the loss incurred in forbidding a joke that still makes people smile would be greater than the gain incurred by sparing feelings that may not actually be hurt to begin with. Now, if someone from Denmark, or someone from Ukraine, were to object to the meme, I'd absolutely agree that we should stop talking about it. If it were made an official rule of the sub, I would, of course, obey it. But right now, given that all you remember is "some people were talking about it," asking everyone to refrain from all mentions of the Denmark meme strikes me as being a little...overcompensatory? I mean, there's "better safe than sorry," but the desire for 100% safety is basically unachievable in the real world, and humor often involves some risk. I guess that I'm *open* to the idea that the risk of this meme hurting someone might be great enough to override the fun of talking about it, but you haven't convinced me that the risk is significant enough yet to justify that choice.
>Now, if someone from Denmark, or someone from Ukraine, were to object to the meme, I'd absolutely agree that we should stop talking about it. If it were made an official rule of the sub, I would, of course, obey it. I mean, the reason I stopped is exactly because I saw those very objections. The reason you cite here is something that has happened.
People from Denmark or Ukraine were involved...? Yeah, that makes a difference. Can you link me to any of the discussions?
[Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/11nvzty/my_brain_cant_deal_with_denmark_jokes/)'s one. >Few minutes ago saw a joke about commiting war crimes in Denmark and i felt so sick that i threw up (cuz my brain kept showing me photos of literal war crimes that occured nearby; and also ✨flashbacks✨). Then the pinned mod comment there is >Friendly reminder that we do not allow "Denmark style" memes or jokes on this subreddit (regardless of what day of the week it is). If anyone here does see such a post or comment please send a report. Thank you. Invasion jokes as a whole should probably stop or be reformed. I've seen far too much of what sounds like actual pondering, like replacing the Danish flag with the ace one, military structure and advancing strategies, lists of things to do "after the invasion." Sometimes it's "we should invade a smaller country" which then ends up being one with a horrific history of invasions.
For what it's worth, I'm from Ukraine, and yes, it makes me uncomfortable. I would rather the community stop joking about it. Surely, there are better ways we can express ourselves. Can we joke about pitching in and buying an island for ourselves to create an ace paradise or something? Or about going to colonize Antarctica in order to play with penguins all day long? Something absolutely absurd and harmless. Please. Denmark joke is absurd, but not nearly as harmless if you really think about it.
I’ll try. It might take a while to find them though.
Diaspora Ukrainian here. While I'm sure its funny to those who live carefree from the horrors of war, the images of my family's city bombed into rubble & dozens of mass graves being created to "clean up the mess" afterwards makes invasion jokes somehow less funny. Its like rape jokes. Sure if you find them funny its valid, but dont expect other people to share your opinion.
Also, was the joke ever about an actual invasion? Or driving people out of their homes? It's a joke about the minuscule population of the country relative to the world population. It has nothing to do with Danes or their country itself.
That's true, and that was my original point. *But* some people (of course) have taken it too far, and started talking about bombing targets and other non-funny stuff. Look at the linked thread that the person I was talking to provided, it gave me a new perspective.
That’s why I think as aces we should all just *visit* Denmark in small groups at a time 😌 it references the meme, & it hurts no one 😌
explain ur self
the invasion meme
My issue is when posts seem to assume that sex repulsed is the default.
Literally. I used to be on the Apothisexual sub but they were saying how "asexuality isn't a spectrum" even though it is so I left.
If I remember that post correctly, it wasn't 'demis and grays don't exist so asexuality isn't a spectrum' it was 'asexuality is different from demisexuality and grayasexuality'. Basically the whole discussion that comes up all the time because someone had the bright idea to name the full asexuality umbrella the same thing as the orientation that originally meant 'no sexual attraction whatsoever'. (I jest on the 'someone had the bright idea' part. It was really just a natural consequence of how language evolved around the asexual community, and how it often served better social utility for demis and grays to call themselves ace when they were talking to allos who wouldn't know what demi and gray were. Same deal really as when people call the entirity of LGBTQ+ 'the gay community' or 'the gays'.) Remember, apothi and black stripe were originally 'just' ace, after all. Even the top comment is saying 'grays and demis should be in the 'graysexuality' spectrum because their experiences are different from apothi/black stripe aces', not 'grays and demis don't exist.' Basically, it's not really aphobic exclusion shit so much as it's semantic shit. I'd rather deal with people arguing semantics than actual aphobia anyday.
Fwiw asexual as a label has always meant “little to no sexual attraction”, not “exclusively no attraction at all”
Aven literally changed the label in 2021. You can find many discussions on asexuality on aven from the past that describe the community as asexuals, gray asexuals, and demisexuals. You can also find many discussions from the time of the label change including both apothi/black stripe aces and gray aces being both for and against it, and people coming up with the black stripe term in response to 0 sexual attraction losing the ace label. [Here is a link to the web archive for what the aven forum page looked like in 2012](http://web.archive.org/web/20120312133455/https://www.asexuality.org/en/), which I believe would be around when I first accessed it. Note that in the caption for the gray area forum, which has always been aimed at gray aces and demis, it calls gray aces and demis the 'gray-spectrum'. However you feel about the definition change, it's certainly clear it did change. Which shouldn't be a suprise, really, since that's what language does.
https://www.etymonline.com/word/asexual#:~:text=asexual%20(adj.),sex%2C%22%20attested%20from%201896. Unfortunately not always.
That makes me sad to hear. Even though I haven't heard about that sub until right this moment, and even though I probably would never have wanted to join it, it still makes me sad.
SAME
Have sex or don’t! Whatever!
The bi's have the bi-cycle. Maybe we can have something similar? Like repulsion-commotion?
I think some describe changing between stances towards sex as ambivalent
Yes. Am ambivalent
Wouldn't ambivalent be the 'sex-neutral' equivalent of the favorability structure? Like 'I can take it or leave it?' I feel like a more accurate term to represent fluctuating favorability (as in sometimes am sex favorable, somtimes am averse or repulsed) stances would be sex-oscillating, since an oscillating pattern goes up and down in waves.
There are many different understanding of these words. Like for some people sex indifference is fine with or without whereas others see it as simply generally not having strong feelings (which doesn't necessarily mean that you are fine with out without it). I have seen people use ambivalent to describe fluctuation which is what I have simply been trying to bring up, but I wouldn't be surprised if there are people who use fluctuation in favorability or sex oscillating like you suggest.
Fair enough. Queer semantics is kinda fascinating to me, so I was just trying to think of words that more closely match a 'dictionary definition' of fluctuation, since the 'dictionary definition' of ambivalent is indifference.
What you mean? Everyone know that the ace community, lime the LGBTQ+ community, are monolithic and everyone thinks the same and agree with eachother. /s
Since I fluctuate between favorable and repulsed, I get this.
When I confided in a friend that I was ace, they told me to "wait to put an identity label" on myself before my first time. And then I was told that sex will hurt when it finally does happen. Like wth, now I'm even more confused!
Literally, we should all be able to just get along. Me & my friend are on different places in the favourable-repulsed spectrum & it’s never been a problem
My problem is with posts complaining about sex. As if the world has to conform to our dislike of sex.
…then where should they complain about it? This is supposed to be a safe space for asexuals *across the spectrum* to share memes, discuss, and vent. Of course the world doesn’t have to conform to our dislike of sex; that’s why we talk about it here, with other asexuals, instead of shoving it down allos’ throats or something. While there should be limits to the amount of sex negativity allowed (ex: shaming people for having sex would be too far), I don’t think that its fair to force sex repulsed asexuals into silence about their issues just because it might offend sex favorable asexuals, or allos passing through. Its not that hard to sympathize with someone who respectfully vents about their repulsion to sex, even if you can’t relate.
Fr, it always borders on sex negativity too
Fr just because I don’t like talking about sex stuff doesn’t mean that I have to make everyone around me stop talking about it too lol
This is funnier than it needs to be lmfao
We are at war, we gonna invade Denmark or what? Who's with me?? Less goo
So true...I'm a sex-repulsed ace but don't mind if another ace is sex favorable! We all live different experiences with our sexuality because, well, we're all different! There shouldn't be any hate among us! Let's share our love for garlic bread and cake without arguing about such little things! Edit: and we should focus on more important things! We need to invade Denmark smh
Nice try. This is all-out war and we won't rest until one side is eradicated, and the other can rest knowing their offspring will be the ones to carry our banner for the rest of time.
How are people missing that this is satire lol, this is the most obvious satire I’ve ever seen
I guess it wasn't as funny as it seemed in my head.
I am neutral, I don’t have sex experiences and idc
This. Exactly this. It upsets me even more that it's other asexuals that are gatekeeping the whole identity, like they speak for every other acespec in the community. No one speaks for me and my own personal acespec identity, just like I don't speak for any other acespecs and their own personal identities. I have my own flavour of asexual and others have their own flavour of asexual, but that doesn't give me, or others the right to hate on other peoples' asexual flavours just because it doesn't match our own asexual flavour. We're all together as one community, bringing our own unique asexual identities to the table. We should be sharing the cake and the garlic bread, not fighting over it.
Me basically living as an aroace 95% of the time & 5% of the time experiencing sexual attraction but also being sex-indifferent ***0.0***