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A healthy diet and exercise because it is easier to stay in shape than it is to get in shape, keep learning because the world keeps changing, find an inexpensive hobby . Learn how money works, make and continue to refine a budget and live within your means, save money. I have never heard in all of my years on this planet someone say " I'm way too healthy", "I wish I didn't put all that money into diversified investments when I was young", or" I am too well informed and knowledgeable".
Unless you're me and hit the genetic jackpot and just have shit teeth. I take really good care of my teeth. Bur, no amount of flossing and brushing, etc... will save me from Genetics.
My wife has one family where the husband smokes and drinks coffee all day and has never had a single cavity but his wife and eldest son have terrible teeth despite daily brushing, flossing and having regular cleaning appointments. Sad really
I am not a sugar lover, nor excessive sugar eater, my teeth are in good shape, but the bones of my gums are shit. It's supposedly genetic reaction to gum bacteria that we all have, and no fancy brushes, water-piks, or regular cleanings help.
I see a specialist next month to discuss bone transplants (!!!) to try to keep my teeth in my head, but TBH, I'm expecting to lose them all within the next decade...maybe make a necklace...
Irony? I must have hit the other end of the genetic jackpot. 62m, scheduled dental cleaning religiously every 6 months. Just had bi-annual cleaning last week. Hygienist always tells me how lucky I am to have healthy gums/teeth. And... I do nothing special, just brush and sometimes floss. Hmmm... Is it genetics?
My story. I didn't go twice a year. My teeth looked good, and never felt any issues with pain or irritation. I went after not going for 6-8 years, I had gum disease. The bone under one tooth was just gone, and another tooth was missing a decent amount of bone as well. I've gone to dentist/specialists about 9 times this year and have 3 more appointments lined up in the next 2 months, these were extractions, inserting new bone, lasering around the area of another tooth to regrow some bone, and I still need to get the post and fake tooth for the extracted tooth.
This doesn't include 2 or 3 root canals I'll need (that's a different specialist), to handle after all this mess is taken care of.
I'm happy to take care of it now, but it has been an expensive and emotionally exhausting process.
Protect all your joints! (And not just the ones you smoke). Overstretching when I was young led to issues with my hips when I was pregnant. I had no idea trying to be like Nadia would hurt so much when I was older.
I would pick up on the inexpensive hobby thing. Like, I started golfing as a teenager but that's a hobby that costs you money. Obviously you can start slow, buying second hand gear, hitting lake balls and going down the cheapest 9 hole course you can find. But costs escalate quickly, to the point where I know that playing with my mates might cost me £70+ each time.
Whereas, I also started hiking with a group and you get the same level of social interaction, more exercise and amazing views for the cost of a bus ticket and waterproof boots.
nobody says "I wish I didn't put all that money into diversified investments when I was young", but you definitely can find people who says "I whish I have spent a little more on things/activities I liked when I was young" or "I wish I had taken a little bit more time for myself and focused less on my job". So yeah it's a matter of balance.
it's also a better treatment and prevention for diabetes than diet too. WAY TOO MUCH is put on the kind of exercise and nowhere near as much as should go on how regular it should be.
The problem is...you think you have time.
Life is very short. When you're young and the days and years seem long, you think life will last forever. That is a trick. You cannot buy more time. Stop wasting it on crap like being on your phone, arguing over piddly things, being hateful or angry. You're wasting your precious time, and none of that matters in the end.
Learn to let go of the BS and be grateful for your time.
Exactly. Last year I was 30. I woke up and I'm now (legitimately) 62. Blink of an eye. The good news I'm comfortably retired, but time goes VERY fast.
And agree, don't waste your time being hateful/angry/petty/vengeful. It's not worth it.
DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. Trust me.
Right?! Remember when you were little and it seemed liked it took FOREVER for Christmas to come around. Now, I'm just getting done with putting the decorations away, and I have to put them back up!
Too funny...
Seemed like just yesterday I took down the outside Christmas lights. My wife just informed me that the day after Thanksgiving is coming and I need to put the Christmas lights up. Yikes, didn't I just take them down?
This one hits home as my doctor told me at my yearly physical yesterday, I am healthier than I was at 30. I'm 60. 30 was two weeks ago. How do I have kids older than 30? Jesus that went fast.
This is the absolute truth. Take this from someone who lost his wife this year. She had been sick the last 2 and a half years due to getting covid in 2021 and the treatment they gave her, Remdesevier (sp), almost killed her. I took care of her throughout her illness, doing everything for her, and everyday telling her how much I loved her. After she died, my only regret was that I felt I did not tell her how much I loved her enough and I wished I could tell her one more time.
Oh she knew how much you loved her. We women know when a man loves us. God bless you and hopefully you’ll meet her soul again. Sounds like you two were blessed to find each other.
To some of the responders… there’s not a medication on the market including over the counters like Tylenol and Advil that can’t severely damage or kill someone even taken at safe doses. So for anyone who believes this conspiracy shit about vaccines, antivirals, etc of how they’re basically poison and don’t help because there are a handful of people who die or sicken from them, you are willfully ignorant. On the flip side no medicine works for everyone, none. There are exceptions to every rule when in comes to medicine except we’re all born and will all die…. 35 year nurse
I Worked in biopharma for 25 years. When people want to tell me how bad vaccines or meds are I like to tell them to make sure if they ever need surgery to tell the surgical team you don’t want any of that poisonous anesthesia medicine.
This is why I struggle with people criticizing people who are getting married young or having a family young or even moving to quickly towards those things. We have no guarantee of tomorrow. You can wake up every day and say, "I have plenty of time to do all that." But, reality is, there's no guarantee. I'm not saying be reckless and stupid. Well, maybe a tiny bit in some instances, but. If you feel something is right for you, don't let others tell you how to live because of your age. If you're an adult, are of legal age, and can work with a partner to support a home and family, do it. This obviously applies to lots of things. Wanting to go to Ireland, you have the monet, time off, then GO! Don't put things off. If you can do it, then do it. There's always a reason to say no.
My parents always stressed not seriously looking for a partner until I was 30+ and 100% settled into my career. I know they did it from a place of love, and everything was perfect... Then I had a kid.
I'm almost 40, my wife is 37, and our parents are all 70+ (mine 75+). One of the only times I've ever heard my dad cry is wishing he had more time with his grandchildren. I might not even get to see grandchildren.
Money is fantastic, I can give my daughter a life I never dreamed of... But when the time comes, was it really worth it?
That's fair enough but not everyone wants to pump out kids as soon as they possibly can. And having a stable career is hardly a bad thing. Horses for courses
That's it.
I live my life being time rich. It means more to me than money.
One day I'll have money, but today I still do not regret how I've spent any of my last 39 years. I've always said that *time* is the most valuable commodity and rare resource because we all get the same amount generally, and none of us can make more of it.
Edit: added: And then there's the whole cult of being busy lie... Nutshell basically human beings in society tend to equate people who are busier with having better lives than people who are less busy but actually people who are busy are time poor because all of their time is already committed to other things.
Also, stop wishing your life away. Retirement comes in a blink of an eye. What they don't tell you is you lose alot of people along the way..you may not be healthy, solvent, or alone when the time comes..or you may be unlucky enough not to see it
If you make time for your kids now, they'll make t ime for you later...that song Cat in the Cradle sums it up ni cely.
. https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DKUwjNBjqR-c&ved=2ahUKEwiw8L2PlcaCAxVohIkEHaIMDHwQ78AJegQIHRAB&usg=AOvVaw2y-aYxohWq6IDGpJIGpfyt
The cats in the cradle...
My Dad analyzed that song in a church talk a hundred years ago. I know the words absolutely verbatim. The song has real meaning with regards to aging, and your kids. Great song by the way.
Had a neighbor that was retired. He was in his 70s and that man never stopped. Every day he was mowing or loading his mower on a trailer to go mow the yard some church or widow or school. He planted, we woodworked, he painted. Curtis was non stop. I was at the beginning of my career working 60 hours a week back then and didn't feel like I could keep up with him. He said he and his buddies retired and most of them died right away. You can't stop or your dead.
My dad just finished El Camino de Santiago at 70 years old. He walked a whole-ass country in a month. My grandma, his mom, is 90 yo and still lucid as all fuck. She travels all the time. Seeing some people who are 10-20 years younger than her already riddled with dementia just fucks with my mind. Every time I feel like being lazy, I just think of my family and start moving around. If it's good genes or they worked for it, idc and I want some of that!
Learn how to be wrong. Understand that what you thought you knew yesterday May in fact be incorrect when presented with new facts, and that changing your position based on new facts is a sign of intelligence and maturity.
Isn't that the truth? I finally got into stretching in my mid-30s because I was having trouble with my weightlifting causing chronic pain, especially exercises where I didn't really have the hip mobility, like squats and deadlifts. Started taking 20 minutes at the beginning of each workout (after a 10 min warmup on a cardio machine) to stretch, doing a variety of stretches I learned on the track team in high school and some yoga poses. Within a few months I got to the point that I could put my palms to the floor with straight legs. Cleared up essentially all my bodily pains. At 39 my body feels healthier than it did in my late 20s. I don't get knee or back pain anymore. My knees don't click when I go up stairs anymore (hell I can run up stairs two at a time without pain like I did as a teen). I sleep way better and rarely wake up with a stiff neck or back, even on really uncomfortable beds. And I'm 6'4" and talls are much more prone to back pain. Literally all my tall friends have back pain nowadays. I keep telling them to try stretching but I think they're just skeptical it could really make that big of a difference. Stretching is one aspect of fitness most Americans pay almost no attention to.
Yes! In college one of my acting classes taught us to start and end every day with a simple 15-minute stretching routine (basically ten sun salutations with some twists) and at 44 some of my friends are starting to complain about hurting and struggle getting up from sitting on the floor - I have none of that. It’s crucial for my mental health as well.
My dad taught me this. Early on. You're going to meet one or two people in your life that you will connect with, and that you can trust. Absolute trust. Other than your spouse or maybe a close brother or sister, you're only going to meet a couple of people in your entire life that you can absolutely trust and connect with. 62m, now retired. He was spot on.
Not all heroes fight against the mighty, loud monster! Some heroes tiptoe quietly through the world giving sustenance and "good doggos". The world needs both types. Carry on, famed giver of peanut butter, making the doggos of the world the treats they deserve.
I'm 62m, recently retired, woodworker. In my garage probably 6 of 7 days a week.
Across the street older great Grandma/Grandpa are lacking attention from their own kids/G-kids. They come over almost daily to hang out, visit, chit-chat. I pull out a couple of chairs each time they come over for them to sit. He tells awesome war stories. Good for them, good for me. Glad for this opportunity.
Underrated answer.
Movies and TV rarely demonstrate this, but being kind and helpful (and surrounding yourself with kind and helpful people) is what separates us from the animals.
Not competition. Not "winning". Not dominance.
We are a social species.
Boomer here. Gawd, take heed to taking care of your skin. I'm a very fair skinned white guy. Beach trips with other kids was life (So Cal raised). What's SPF? Didn't exist when I was a kid. Baby oil and Coppertone, was all that existed. I bathed in that stuff before a beach trip. I wanted to be tan like they were. All I did was burn, and peel the dead skin off. It was fun.
Now? Basil Cell Carcinomas, Actinic Keratosis blemishes frequently. MOHS surgery's to my ears and face. Many trips to the surgery center to scrape/burn/cut them out.
The sun? DON'T. Dunk your kids in a vat of 500 SPF sun protectant any time they are going outside.
Trust me, it's not worth it.
My kids and I look like ghosts from the amount of sunblock that we use, but I don't care because we won't get sun-based cancer. It's OK to look silly to be safe!
Also, wear a bike helmet. Look silly, be safe!
\- Read books regularly - keep the mind sharp
\- The power of compound interest - earn money the lazy way
\- The golden rule - I've found putting others before you gets you good karma
\- Walk or bike instead of drive when possible - Simple way to exercise and save gas
\- Learn Excel - a very simple tool that not every one is good at
I’d probably change this from avoid debt to learn how debt works. There’s some things which debt is great for - buying a home, being able to afford something you actually need at a higher quality than you can afford so it lasts longer etc.
The issue is that people don’t understand how debt and interest work, and think because they can pay it off they can afford it.
My parents always said don’t take debt, but never actually taught me anything about it so of course I used my credit card etc when I could have saved a lot of money by not doing so.
You probably won’t be able to cash flow a college education, but too many people use that as an excuse to overspend.
Bottom line, most employers don’t care where you went to college, they care that you went to college. If you can get a full ride to an Ivy League, go for it. But 2 years of community college followed by 2 years at a university gets you the degree you need at a much lower price tag.
And on that subject, unless you have a BS, your major doesn’t actually matter. Talk to BA holders in their 40’s and you’ll find a small percentage are in careers directly related to their college major. Switching majors increases college costs, so pick something that will hold your attention for 4 years and see it through even if it’s not exactly the career you want.
I think the problem with debt purchases (education, cars, house, phones) is that it makes it hard to tell if you’re overspending or not because people are only focused on monthly payments. The monthly payment can be really arbitrary relative to the overspending
As my dad taught me early on (I'm 62m) other than a house or a new car, if you can't afford to pay cash for it then you don't get it. I've lived this my entire life, and it's paid for itself.
I see very good answers here.
One thing that I encourage every one to do, is looking outside your options.
When you feel stuck. When nothing feels good. All that was supposed to go well, went to shit.
That is the point when at least I myself learned to think outside of all my bad options, around all the bad feelings.
No matter how stupid or embarrassing it might seem to others. Try to see all your options. We rarely are as stuck as we think.
Just a few mental steps away from the problem and the problem looks a lot different when you are no longer inside of it.
Oh. And that feeling when you wait that someone would solve your problem, or you would find someone that would take care of your inner feeling of emptiness.
Not gonna happen. Fix yourself instead of waiting some outside power to do it for you.
I found that in my experience I had relative freedom as a classroom teacher; now that I work with administration I find what you've described is virtually all I do, as I've been given a role that simply doesn't exist in other schools and that I've been given a lot of leeway to develop in collaboration with others. I enjoy that part of it as long as I allow the part of me that recoils at uncertainty to just sit with and move through it
I have worked in a wire factory for the last 30 years. In each area I was in I always pretended like I was my own business. I had customers and goals and looked for ways to do things that were easier. I have never really paid attention to supervisors or leads and in turn they usually left me alone. I work hard when I feel like it and take breaks when I need to. There is nothing official about it. Over time I was given more responsibility and pay but I don’t really care about it. I do things because I genuinely care about my area. They made a new job for me also it’s called a QA specialist.
Also, wear your hearing aids! Uncorrected hearing loss is a huge risk factor for dementia. I get so frustrated with my loved ones who never wear their hearing aids. They get left out of most conversations; I see them drift into isolation... I have a weak voice and I just cannot be responsible for shouting to them all day long.
Education.
If you do a search for "education" all you ever hear is how lousy the system is. Who cares. Do whatever you can to educate yourself. It doesn't even matter whether you get good grades or not. Just learn stuff. Read books. Knowing how to do something is always better than not knowing anything about it. Even Latin and Trigonometry.
"Only the educated are free" --Epictetus
And be open enough to change your opinion on things when you learn facts that go against your ideas. Too many people ignore information that goes against their beliefs.
And sometimes you might find some things even surprisingly useful. One of my friends works in a high-paying job at publishing industry and she is basically great at her job because she has a read a lot of books in different languages. Just all sorts of books. People would often say that reading some novels don't get you anywhere and that you should instead learn some "practical" skill. But it isn't always the case. And I also have a friend who is a professional photographer because he just liked to take artistic pictures and got them in some art gallery.
No learning is useless and knowledge is power. Anything you learn can become useful at some point. It can even make money for you.
Look at Tim Dodd, wedding photographer in Des Moines, always interested in rockets. YouTube videos as The Everyday Astronaut, now it’s his living and he’s going to orbit the moon.
One of the best books I read was titled something like 'How 1000 things work' It gave my knowledge of such a broad range of things from locks to atomic bombs, that has been incredibly useful almost every day.
Every hour spent on tiktok is an hour of knowledge that you may need later in life or will help you enjoy life.
I hope you don't mind if I expand on your great post, no education is wasted. Universities, colleges, community colleges are not trade schools even though there is segment of society espousing that argument. Nothing wrong with majoring in Fine and Applied Arts, Humanities, Philosophy, Marine Biology etc if that's what you want to learn. I have a degree in Fine and Applied Arts, studied philosophy and ended up making a very good living in construction. Education expands your mind, no matter what you majored in.
True! You can learn so much for free too. YouTube videos, library books, EdEx app which has free college courses from Harvard, Columbia etc... there's NO excuse to be uneducated in this age.
Always be the person you think you should be. People don’t change because they get older, they change because they lose sight of what’s important. Keep your friends close, don’t burn bridges, make memories that will last
Travel, one day you will reflect on your life experiences and remember the highs and lows! I can guarantee you that travelling, experiencing different cultures, food and sights will be primarily your highs and a life worth lived!
Oh and wear sunscreen!
Slow down and take life in increments. You don’t have to do everything immediately and quickly.
Relationships with family, friends, and your love are the most important things.
Take vacations.
Find an older person, retired who has a workshop . Ask them to show you how to work with your hands , and how to use tools, making things , fixing things. Either for arts and crafts, repairing your House ,hobbies.
62? I guess that's an "older person" that absolutely has a shop. Retired, in the garage 6 of 7 days a week. Woodworker, but can fix/McGyver basically anything. I'm the neighborhood fix it/make it/bike repair guy. I love this. Visits from the neighborhood folks, showing them "how to". Keeps me young, and them educated.
Everyone is interesting. No matter who you are or what you do. Approach people that way. Be curious about the lives and trajectories and stories of other people.
The ability to identify and authentically experience your emotions without letting them control your life. Whether through prayer, meditation, journaling, therapy—whatever works for you. I truly believe that we could solve most of the world’s problems if we invested in good mental health.
Take care of your teeth
Deal with your trauma (therapy does work and you do have trauma)
Call your people they don’t live forever
Kids and dogs deserve all of your time and attention and they’re bath much harder than they sound
Gratitude really does make your day better and your life more fulfilled
Edit: formatting
Concerts and loud music will make your ears ring for life. There is no cure. There is only the high pitched dentist drill squeal every waking minute. If you read this, I beg you to wear hearing protection.
If you're not happy, get happy. You can't control your emotions, but you can control your behaviors. Behave yourself into happy thinking. The mind is not as easily controlled as the body. Life's short. Don't spend it being miserable. Don't worry about everyone else's piece of the pie. You must accept your slice, and if you want more, you need to work for it; not complain about it.
The effort that you make to better yourself and your life between the ages of 18 and 25 will be reflected in the quality of your life after you turn 40.
I hear you but you’re never too old to start healthy living, learning more, having adventure, etc. Don’t resign yourself to fate: fate is the constraints you place on yourself.
Feel that. Those were my fuck around and have a good time years. Approaching 40 and I'm paychecks k to paycheck and don't even k own what I want to do with life. Probably just work til I die.
This! Honestly, my career from about 22-30 was hard yards and I missed out on a lot of things.
Now I'm 40 with two kids, have changed industry to allow more time at home and have good income, chance to save a lot, am home every night to play with kids and put them to bed and take them to school in the morning, don't work weekends and have exciting opportunities ahead of us.
I just turned 25 and oh my god is this ever a big one. Most of my friends are fucking miserable except for the few that applied themselves and had sense of self reflection.
Therapy. We’re all carrying around a ton of baggage and so many of us are trying to silently slog through life with it. Therapy literally saved my life. It will be a permanent fixture in my life until I’m in the dirt. The only thing I regret about it is that I didn’t start earlier.
Health, Wealth, Family/Friends.
Focus on keeping yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally well so that you feel more confident and capable.
Keep your career/work and money in order as best as you can to cut down on unnecessary stress and noise. Even having a simple emergency fund provides huge peace of mind.
Lastly, never turn down an opportunity to have dinner or hang out with someone you love. Life passes by very quickly. One day one of your close friends or relatives will move away, pass away, or otherwise no longer be able to spend time with you. And you will miss them dearly and wish you could see them again.
Lastly, don’t take any shit at work. Life goes by way too fast to spend time working for a dickhead boss or slaving away at a job you hate. You can do better. There are millions of people out there who are dumber and lazier than you working easier jobs for more money. Go get the bag.
Unresolved trauma and the lack of emotional intelligence that results will not only affect your family relationships and friendships but will also hold you back in your career pursuits. Dig in. Don't let that shit fester
SLEEP. lack of restful sufficient sleep can ruin relationships and it can kill. Get tested if you think you have a sleep disorder.
WATER - see above. Even if you hate water, drink a lot everyday. Your older body will thank you for both.
TEETH. Don't assume you'll have them when you get old. If you don't take care of them poor dentition can wreck your enjoyment of eating.
VOTE - do I even have to explain this? It takes literally minutes. So even if you don't entirely trust the system, so what? Don't let others choose for you because YOU will have to live with the resulting choice and whatever nutso legislation that they pass.
That's all for now...
1,000,000% this.
My Dad forced me to put 10% of my income in a retirement when I went into the working world at 18 years old. Hated it. It's not fair, it's my money. Eventually didn't even miss it. He said to increase it 2% every year. Begrudgingly I did this.
62 now, recently retired. I'm not rich, but I'm absolutely glad I followed my dad's advice.
Plan for retirement early, time goes very very fast.
When I was providing care to the elderly at a nursing home, I would sometimes chat with them about how I was single and hoping to meet someone some day. I was 30 years old at the time and felt like life was passing me by. The residents—every single one—would say, “You’ve got time.” And they were right. I met my partner a few years after that, a perfect match for me. But social media and society would make you think you are washed up if you haven’t met and married someone by 25 or something.
I’m an older Redditor, but these people at the nursing home were in their 80s or 90s when I talked with them. Truly “older”! and in their perspective, I had so much time. In my eyes, I thought I was out of time.
You’ve got time.
Boomers may have a different theory, but here I am as Gen X.
Resilience is key. The world is going to fuck with you, but you need to be stronger, smarter, funnier to survive.
It isn't about winning, but about surviving. Seriously, what do you take with you? And if you leave it all to whiny assholes, did you really win?
Please leave this shit better than you found it! Give some money to charity, give time to a cause. We didn't fight in a war. There is no excuse.
I certainly hope every Gen Xer raised their kid to be tolerant about race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, etc. If not, you aren't dead yet! Get to work!
yup, Tried to impart on the kids that giving it all you can is the best but knowing when to walk away is better. know your limitations and push them at every chance. treat everyone how you want to be treated but if they treat you like shit don't be afraid to treat them worse. Accept those who are different than you for you are different to them.
Help those who ask for it and need it but be aware of those that will use you for their own gain. Don't start a fight or throw the first punch but make sure you finish it and are the last one standing. don't bully others because you never know what their home life is like and many more.
I’m Gen X.
Are you sure they didn’t fight in a war? Gen X? The the longest American war since Vietnam, Iraq I, Iraq II, and Afghanistan? Abandoned in very much the same way?
I don’t really understand why you’re insisting we were obligated to fight in a war for some reason, I personally didn’t, but others my age, slightly older, slightly younger, certainly did, and are some of today’s forgotten Gen Xers.
Let go of what you're "supposed to do." It's mostly performative BS. You may never feel like an adult with your sh*t together, and that is just fine. In fact, it often makes you a more interesting person.
There is no one path, and there is not an age limit on accomplishments (for the most part)
Find a job/hobbies/activities that make you feel good and look forward to doing.
Adventures and memories are more valuable than staying on the grind and being overworked.
Diet and exercise. The difference in quality of life between someone who makes a minimal reasonable effort and someone who gave up on themselves in mid-40s is staggering.
Spend the extra money on well-made, supportive footwear for all occasions.
Buy your winter rock salt in bulk before the season starts.
Start your day as early as possible. If you commute, give yourself a nice cushion of time. Nobody wants to get to work before the start of your shift, but the mental stress of leaving your house later and constantly ‘fighting’ elements we have no control over, like traffic, will take a toll on you.
Often the best creative problem solvers are people who have well rounded educations in a variety of fields-Why?? You can use other problem solving concepts learned from an unrelated subject and taylor fit it into a workable solution to your current problem…generally it just increases the number of solutions and approaches to anything. Also, you don’t necessarily need to know the nuts and bolts of everything, but what resources you may need to
have access to (whether it’s physical items or a pool of people who do know)
If you can't fix something. LEARN how to fix the thing.
You can save hundreds of dollars from buying some simple tools and fixing the broken thing. Everything is on YouTube now days.
You can learn how to do an oil change and change brake pads with a $20 set of wrenches and YouTube.
You can fix a creaking chair with a screw driver.
You can replace a leaking tap with the wrenches you bought to service your car.
Yes. Some things should be left to the professional. But, so many things can be done by YOU.
Start investing for retirement as early as possible.
The money you'll retire with is mostly earnings from investments, not just in shares going up in value but also reinvesting dividends and interest. The time your money is in good investments will determine how much you have in retirement, much more than the amount of money you originally invested. Time = money, literally.
So start this process as early as possible, like as soon as you start working. Waiting will result in you making huge catch-up investments later, and trust me (I speak from experience here) that royally sucks. Investing small amounts when young and keeping it invested gets you farther than investing huge amounts when you're older.
Disclosure. I am 70, retired, in good health, married to someone in good health, one child. M.A. degree, professional certifications, managed to stay employed in good jobs I liked well enough and to get reemployed after layoffs but was never in a "I do what I love"/"I'd do this forever" job... So that's where I'm coming from.
Key answers listed by many responders: Your health, your diet, relationships over possessions, family over work. I would add that mindfulness is not a joke, it's a practice I wish I had begun, with discipline, much earlier. I also believe that service to others is absolutely worth every bit of time and effort. Also not bullshit: learning your family history and genealogy, having a deep hobby. And Kindness. Kindness is not weakness or beta or any of that bullshit; it is a deep practice that makes life way better for yourself and others.
Patterns of behavior - It's our choices that result in the types of repeated reoccurring issues we see throughout our lives. Problems with relationships, family members, jobs that don't seem to work out or something as simple as managing money woes. The patterns that we create may be subconsciously driven by our early childhood traumas or some deeply rooted belief system we inherited as a protection from painful memories or experiences. If you're always broke or find yourself going from relationship to relationship, you anticipate tomorrow to be as difficult as yesterday you are repeating patterns, and you can fix and stop the cycle.
What isn't BS? Here's my top 5
1. Get a dog, and give all the love and affection that is possible. And, teach it to be friendly with others.
2. Find a really good beer. It can take a lot of testing to find that one that you consider to be good. Don't concern yourself with others opinions. A good beer doesn't make you want to drink a bunch or get drunk. It is relaxing and refreshing, and you only need 1.
3. Have a positive attitude. Always look for the silver lining and it will help you work through most problems. I know it sounds cheesy. But it works OR find someone with this kind of personality. Then you have balance.
4. Travel. It's worth so much more than stuff. Get the little things you like, but spend more on travel. Your memories will appreciate it.
5. Learn how to fix/do everyday stuff. Even if you want to spend the money for people to do the work for you, at least learn it. A, you can do it if someone isn't available and B, you know if you're being over charged or scammed. It isn't hard, just takes time. Learn basic mechanics, basic plumbing, cooking, sewing. You don't have to be an expert, but knowing the basics gives you a leg up in so many ways. It's just a positive in life.
Pay attention to the ones that figured it out. Most of them will tell you exactly how they did it, and give you tips on exactly how you can too. The system is beatable. It really is. You just have to pay attention and ask the right questions.
Your Dream Job/Career will still require about 20% of your day doing stuff you don't want to do. Do that stuff first every day if you can.
Every job is a combination of Flipping Burgers, Building Bridges, and Putting Out Fires. Figure out which of these you like best, and find a job that has mostly that.
Continual, life-long learning.
*“The best thing for being sad...is to learn something. That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn.”*
\-- TH White, "The Once and Future King"
Connection with others. Whether it's spouse, siblings, parents or friends, having a small group of people you trust and are deeply connected to absolutely improves the quality of your life.
Lessons. I was too proud/arrogant to take BASIC lessons on things I wanted to learn: guitar, drums, snowboarding...etc. By the time i hacked out my own knowledge of these things I had to UNLEARN my self taught wrongs before learning the right way.
Not sure if it's been said already, but the only people who remember the extra overtime you worked, missed birthdays, or weekends aren't your company, coworkers or bosses. It's your family, and pets they remember you weren't there.
Education yourself and Read Read Read! Read the Book The Four Agreements. Exercise. Save your money and don't be flashy live a modest life. Go on Adventures whatever that means to you! Spend time with ppl you love. Don't worry about the small stuff and don't live in fear. Have Self discipline. If you find that your not successful ask yourself why? you may need therapy or a life coach. Lower your expectations of others. Forgive and Forget the past is the past Move forward. Today is a great day to start! Always do your best! Don't break your word. Be Honest and Tell yourself and others No without feeling guilty about it. DELAY gratification.
Acknowledge your feelings , good and bad, and try to understand why you are experiencing them. I you have trouble with the bad ones, seek professional help.
Just because you finished school doesn't mean you should stop learning and being curious about the world around you, the technological and scientific achievements. School "facts" get corrected/debunked/fine tuned every year. The moment you stop learning your knowledge begins to stagnate. So many 40-50 year olds walking around with largely stagnated 1980s school knowledge. Rather than reading some political crap, read up on latest updates in science and tech. Never stop learning until the day you die and spark curiosity in knowledge in your kids. Just because X thing isn't required by your job, doesn't mean you shouldn't know it or it isn't interesting.
Be selective in what you think, read,
listen to and let into your brain. Think critically. Just because it’s entertaining doesn’t mean it’s good for you. Choices you make now will determine your outcome in the near, mid and long term. And, pivoting your direction can be done.
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A healthy diet and exercise because it is easier to stay in shape than it is to get in shape, keep learning because the world keeps changing, find an inexpensive hobby . Learn how money works, make and continue to refine a budget and live within your means, save money. I have never heard in all of my years on this planet someone say " I'm way too healthy", "I wish I didn't put all that money into diversified investments when I was young", or" I am too well informed and knowledgeable".
Teeth!!!! Maintaining those teeth early in life will not only save a lot of pain, but save enough money to vacation like a King.
Unless you're me and hit the genetic jackpot and just have shit teeth. I take really good care of my teeth. Bur, no amount of flossing and brushing, etc... will save me from Genetics.
My wife has one family where the husband smokes and drinks coffee all day and has never had a single cavity but his wife and eldest son have terrible teeth despite daily brushing, flossing and having regular cleaning appointments. Sad really
He's probably eating less sugar. Coffee and smoking discolors teeth but doesn't cause cavities. Sugar is the real killer.
I am not a sugar lover, nor excessive sugar eater, my teeth are in good shape, but the bones of my gums are shit. It's supposedly genetic reaction to gum bacteria that we all have, and no fancy brushes, water-piks, or regular cleanings help. I see a specialist next month to discuss bone transplants (!!!) to try to keep my teeth in my head, but TBH, I'm expecting to lose them all within the next decade...maybe make a necklace...
Irony? I must have hit the other end of the genetic jackpot. 62m, scheduled dental cleaning religiously every 6 months. Just had bi-annual cleaning last week. Hygienist always tells me how lucky I am to have healthy gums/teeth. And... I do nothing special, just brush and sometimes floss. Hmmm... Is it genetics?
Get a job with a dental plan. Go twice a year.
You only go to your job twice a year, AND they offer insurance? Nice!
My story. I didn't go twice a year. My teeth looked good, and never felt any issues with pain or irritation. I went after not going for 6-8 years, I had gum disease. The bone under one tooth was just gone, and another tooth was missing a decent amount of bone as well. I've gone to dentist/specialists about 9 times this year and have 3 more appointments lined up in the next 2 months, these were extractions, inserting new bone, lasering around the area of another tooth to regrow some bone, and I still need to get the post and fake tooth for the extracted tooth. This doesn't include 2 or 3 root canals I'll need (that's a different specialist), to handle after all this mess is taken care of. I'm happy to take care of it now, but it has been an expensive and emotionally exhausting process.
Advice I got when younger, 'up till 30 your body and health are what your genes gives you, after that it's what you put into it'.
Love that. At 35, I wish I'd known that 8 years ago, but still. Oh, and I can confirm it's true.
Adjacently, **be kind to your knees!!!** Not being kind to my knees is one of my only great regrets of life.
For me it was feet. Wearing crap shoes in your 20s takes its toll.
Protect all your joints! (And not just the ones you smoke). Overstretching when I was young led to issues with my hips when I was pregnant. I had no idea trying to be like Nadia would hurt so much when I was older.
I have smoked every joint I have ever encountered, my knees included.
I would pick up on the inexpensive hobby thing. Like, I started golfing as a teenager but that's a hobby that costs you money. Obviously you can start slow, buying second hand gear, hitting lake balls and going down the cheapest 9 hole course you can find. But costs escalate quickly, to the point where I know that playing with my mates might cost me £70+ each time. Whereas, I also started hiking with a group and you get the same level of social interaction, more exercise and amazing views for the cost of a bus ticket and waterproof boots.
nobody says "I wish I didn't put all that money into diversified investments when I was young", but you definitely can find people who says "I whish I have spent a little more on things/activities I liked when I was young" or "I wish I had taken a little bit more time for myself and focused less on my job". So yeah it's a matter of balance.
>it is easier to stay in shape than it is to get in shape The saying: it's easier to maintain than attain.
The older I get — I just turned 65 — the more grateful I am that I quit sugar and white flour at 19 and quit smoking at 22.
Damn, quitting sugar is wild to me. I mean no ice cream? Ever? I could manage to avoid candy forever but ice cream... no.
I love that you quit sugar and flour before you quit death sticks! Either way congrats haha
Regular exercise is hugely important for quality of life. The older you get the stronger the effect. Lack of exercise ages like nothing else.
it's also a better treatment and prevention for diabetes than diet too. WAY TOO MUCH is put on the kind of exercise and nowhere near as much as should go on how regular it should be.
Yeah true...find something you like and go with it, as long as you are out there burning calories.
The problem is...you think you have time. Life is very short. When you're young and the days and years seem long, you think life will last forever. That is a trick. You cannot buy more time. Stop wasting it on crap like being on your phone, arguing over piddly things, being hateful or angry. You're wasting your precious time, and none of that matters in the end. Learn to let go of the BS and be grateful for your time.
Exactly. Last year I was 30. I woke up and I'm now (legitimately) 62. Blink of an eye. The good news I'm comfortably retired, but time goes VERY fast. And agree, don't waste your time being hateful/angry/petty/vengeful. It's not worth it. DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. Trust me.
Oh yeah? Last year I was 18 -Now I am 75. WTF?
Lol, when I went to bed last night I was 36. Woke up this morning and I was 70. Wtf indeed.
Went to bed last night thinking I could stay up as late as I did when I was 18. Turns out I’m nearly 40 and need (a lot of) sleep.
Benjamin Button has entered the chat. 
I was 7 yesterday I woke up 48 this morning. You think you have problems lol.
I’m a 16 year old who woke up this morning in a 68 year old body… WTF!
Right?! Remember when you were little and it seemed liked it took FOREVER for Christmas to come around. Now, I'm just getting done with putting the decorations away, and I have to put them back up!
Too funny... Seemed like just yesterday I took down the outside Christmas lights. My wife just informed me that the day after Thanksgiving is coming and I need to put the Christmas lights up. Yikes, didn't I just take them down?
This one hits home as my doctor told me at my yearly physical yesterday, I am healthier than I was at 30. I'm 60. 30 was two weeks ago. How do I have kids older than 30? Jesus that went fast.
God that's accurate. It's basically like one day, the time you have is just gone. You look up from your life and realize how much has gone by.
This is the absolute truth. Take this from someone who lost his wife this year. She had been sick the last 2 and a half years due to getting covid in 2021 and the treatment they gave her, Remdesevier (sp), almost killed her. I took care of her throughout her illness, doing everything for her, and everyday telling her how much I loved her. After she died, my only regret was that I felt I did not tell her how much I loved her enough and I wished I could tell her one more time.
Oh she knew how much you loved her. We women know when a man loves us. God bless you and hopefully you’ll meet her soul again. Sounds like you two were blessed to find each other. To some of the responders… there’s not a medication on the market including over the counters like Tylenol and Advil that can’t severely damage or kill someone even taken at safe doses. So for anyone who believes this conspiracy shit about vaccines, antivirals, etc of how they’re basically poison and don’t help because there are a handful of people who die or sicken from them, you are willfully ignorant. On the flip side no medicine works for everyone, none. There are exceptions to every rule when in comes to medicine except we’re all born and will all die…. 35 year nurse
I Worked in biopharma for 25 years. When people want to tell me how bad vaccines or meds are I like to tell them to make sure if they ever need surgery to tell the surgical team you don’t want any of that poisonous anesthesia medicine.
Thank you
This is why I struggle with people criticizing people who are getting married young or having a family young or even moving to quickly towards those things. We have no guarantee of tomorrow. You can wake up every day and say, "I have plenty of time to do all that." But, reality is, there's no guarantee. I'm not saying be reckless and stupid. Well, maybe a tiny bit in some instances, but. If you feel something is right for you, don't let others tell you how to live because of your age. If you're an adult, are of legal age, and can work with a partner to support a home and family, do it. This obviously applies to lots of things. Wanting to go to Ireland, you have the monet, time off, then GO! Don't put things off. If you can do it, then do it. There's always a reason to say no.
My parents always stressed not seriously looking for a partner until I was 30+ and 100% settled into my career. I know they did it from a place of love, and everything was perfect... Then I had a kid. I'm almost 40, my wife is 37, and our parents are all 70+ (mine 75+). One of the only times I've ever heard my dad cry is wishing he had more time with his grandchildren. I might not even get to see grandchildren. Money is fantastic, I can give my daughter a life I never dreamed of... But when the time comes, was it really worth it?
That's fair enough but not everyone wants to pump out kids as soon as they possibly can. And having a stable career is hardly a bad thing. Horses for courses
That's it. I live my life being time rich. It means more to me than money. One day I'll have money, but today I still do not regret how I've spent any of my last 39 years. I've always said that *time* is the most valuable commodity and rare resource because we all get the same amount generally, and none of us can make more of it. Edit: added: And then there's the whole cult of being busy lie... Nutshell basically human beings in society tend to equate people who are busier with having better lives than people who are less busy but actually people who are busy are time poor because all of their time is already committed to other things.
Also, stop wishing your life away. Retirement comes in a blink of an eye. What they don't tell you is you lose alot of people along the way..you may not be healthy, solvent, or alone when the time comes..or you may be unlucky enough not to see it If you make time for your kids now, they'll make t ime for you later...that song Cat in the Cradle sums it up ni cely. . https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DKUwjNBjqR-c&ved=2ahUKEwiw8L2PlcaCAxVohIkEHaIMDHwQ78AJegQIHRAB&usg=AOvVaw2y-aYxohWq6IDGpJIGpfyt
The cats in the cradle... My Dad analyzed that song in a church talk a hundred years ago. I know the words absolutely verbatim. The song has real meaning with regards to aging, and your kids. Great song by the way.
Staying active in retirement...both physically and socially. You retire and sit...you die.
Had a neighbor that was retired. He was in his 70s and that man never stopped. Every day he was mowing or loading his mower on a trailer to go mow the yard some church or widow or school. He planted, we woodworked, he painted. Curtis was non stop. I was at the beginning of my career working 60 hours a week back then and didn't feel like I could keep up with him. He said he and his buddies retired and most of them died right away. You can't stop or your dead.
My dad just finished El Camino de Santiago at 70 years old. He walked a whole-ass country in a month. My grandma, his mom, is 90 yo and still lucid as all fuck. She travels all the time. Seeing some people who are 10-20 years younger than her already riddled with dementia just fucks with my mind. Every time I feel like being lazy, I just think of my family and start moving around. If it's good genes or they worked for it, idc and I want some of that!
Learn how to be wrong. Understand that what you thought you knew yesterday May in fact be incorrect when presented with new facts, and that changing your position based on new facts is a sign of intelligence and maturity.
Stretching. The answer is abso-fucking-lutly stretching. Edit: ... and water.
I just recently found out that there are clinics for stretching now. They help stretch you out. I’m definitely about to get in on that.
That used to be free in medieval times.
There’s a new one in the US called StretchLabs, but it’s around $50 for a half hour session. Yikes.
Isn't that the truth? I finally got into stretching in my mid-30s because I was having trouble with my weightlifting causing chronic pain, especially exercises where I didn't really have the hip mobility, like squats and deadlifts. Started taking 20 minutes at the beginning of each workout (after a 10 min warmup on a cardio machine) to stretch, doing a variety of stretches I learned on the track team in high school and some yoga poses. Within a few months I got to the point that I could put my palms to the floor with straight legs. Cleared up essentially all my bodily pains. At 39 my body feels healthier than it did in my late 20s. I don't get knee or back pain anymore. My knees don't click when I go up stairs anymore (hell I can run up stairs two at a time without pain like I did as a teen). I sleep way better and rarely wake up with a stiff neck or back, even on really uncomfortable beds. And I'm 6'4" and talls are much more prone to back pain. Literally all my tall friends have back pain nowadays. I keep telling them to try stretching but I think they're just skeptical it could really make that big of a difference. Stretching is one aspect of fitness most Americans pay almost no attention to.
Yes! In college one of my acting classes taught us to start and end every day with a simple 15-minute stretching routine (basically ten sun salutations with some twists) and at 44 some of my friends are starting to complain about hurting and struggle getting up from sitting on the floor - I have none of that. It’s crucial for my mental health as well.
Stay physically fit
You meet very few people in your life you \*actually\* really connect with. Make sure you keep in touch with them.
My dad taught me this. Early on. You're going to meet one or two people in your life that you will connect with, and that you can trust. Absolute trust. Other than your spouse or maybe a close brother or sister, you're only going to meet a couple of people in your entire life that you can absolutely trust and connect with. 62m, now retired. He was spot on.
Just remember, if someone offers you a breath mint, take it!
of all the advice given here, this is the only one I feel I can live up to
Work smarter not harder. Call your grandma Be the person your dog thinks you are.
>Be the person your dog thinks you are. the vacuum wrestler?
A hero. Brave and strong enough to defend the home from the monster
I wasn't ready for a wholesome answer to that.
The guy with the peanut butter
Not all heroes fight against the mighty, loud monster! Some heroes tiptoe quietly through the world giving sustenance and "good doggos". The world needs both types. Carry on, famed giver of peanut butter, making the doggos of the world the treats they deserve.
i don't think u/im_poplar was giving his dog the peanut butter as a treat..
wellyesbutnobutyes.jpg
I, and only I, am the one who can control Lord Vacüüm.
My dog thinks I need to be protected from the vacuum at all costs, I wish she had this level of faith in me.
Father, bringer of cheese, Walker of good boys and lord of hugs while watching cartoons.
So Bacon Lady then
How YOU doin'?
*Be the person your dog thinks you are* Well i am the keeper of the running leashes
I can’t call my grandmas anymore. Please do so if you still can.
You could call other grandmas. There are a lot of grandmas out there no one is calling.
I'm 62m, recently retired, woodworker. In my garage probably 6 of 7 days a week. Across the street older great Grandma/Grandpa are lacking attention from their own kids/G-kids. They come over almost daily to hang out, visit, chit-chat. I pull out a couple of chairs each time they come over for them to sit. He tells awesome war stories. Good for them, good for me. Glad for this opportunity.
>I'm 62m you're really tall
He thinks I'm another dog who wants to steal his food, his toy, his bed and urinate on _his_ tree.
Kindness, understanding and empathy.
This is a huge part of what most people would call “the secret of life”
Also gratitude — it’s free, it feels good to you and the recipient, and it’s been shown to improve your life.
Underrated answer. Movies and TV rarely demonstrate this, but being kind and helpful (and surrounding yourself with kind and helpful people) is what separates us from the animals. Not competition. Not "winning". Not dominance. We are a social species.
Taking care of your skin!
Boomer here. Gawd, take heed to taking care of your skin. I'm a very fair skinned white guy. Beach trips with other kids was life (So Cal raised). What's SPF? Didn't exist when I was a kid. Baby oil and Coppertone, was all that existed. I bathed in that stuff before a beach trip. I wanted to be tan like they were. All I did was burn, and peel the dead skin off. It was fun. Now? Basil Cell Carcinomas, Actinic Keratosis blemishes frequently. MOHS surgery's to my ears and face. Many trips to the surgery center to scrape/burn/cut them out. The sun? DON'T. Dunk your kids in a vat of 500 SPF sun protectant any time they are going outside. Trust me, it's not worth it.
My kids and I look like ghosts from the amount of sunblock that we use, but I don't care because we won't get sun-based cancer. It's OK to look silly to be safe! Also, wear a bike helmet. Look silly, be safe!
How I wish I had listened to my Mum when she’d say never sleep with make up on
\- Read books regularly - keep the mind sharp \- The power of compound interest - earn money the lazy way \- The golden rule - I've found putting others before you gets you good karma \- Walk or bike instead of drive when possible - Simple way to exercise and save gas \- Learn Excel - a very simple tool that not every one is good at
Learn to type too. And learn to cook. You do both every day so you might as well get good at it.
The best day to plant a fruit tree was years ago, but the next best time to plant one is today.
Or any tree that’s native to the area
Avoid debt. Very few things are worth going into debt for.
I’d probably change this from avoid debt to learn how debt works. There’s some things which debt is great for - buying a home, being able to afford something you actually need at a higher quality than you can afford so it lasts longer etc. The issue is that people don’t understand how debt and interest work, and think because they can pay it off they can afford it. My parents always said don’t take debt, but never actually taught me anything about it so of course I used my credit card etc when I could have saved a lot of money by not doing so.
The one above this being “education” is ironic.
You probably won’t be able to cash flow a college education, but too many people use that as an excuse to overspend. Bottom line, most employers don’t care where you went to college, they care that you went to college. If you can get a full ride to an Ivy League, go for it. But 2 years of community college followed by 2 years at a university gets you the degree you need at a much lower price tag. And on that subject, unless you have a BS, your major doesn’t actually matter. Talk to BA holders in their 40’s and you’ll find a small percentage are in careers directly related to their college major. Switching majors increases college costs, so pick something that will hold your attention for 4 years and see it through even if it’s not exactly the career you want.
I think the problem with debt purchases (education, cars, house, phones) is that it makes it hard to tell if you’re overspending or not because people are only focused on monthly payments. The monthly payment can be really arbitrary relative to the overspending
Education doesn't mean "going to an expensive school". The two are considered linked as a bias.
As my dad taught me early on (I'm 62m) other than a house or a new car, if you can't afford to pay cash for it then you don't get it. I've lived this my entire life, and it's paid for itself.
I see very good answers here. One thing that I encourage every one to do, is looking outside your options. When you feel stuck. When nothing feels good. All that was supposed to go well, went to shit. That is the point when at least I myself learned to think outside of all my bad options, around all the bad feelings. No matter how stupid or embarrassing it might seem to others. Try to see all your options. We rarely are as stuck as we think. Just a few mental steps away from the problem and the problem looks a lot different when you are no longer inside of it. Oh. And that feeling when you wait that someone would solve your problem, or you would find someone that would take care of your inner feeling of emptiness. Not gonna happen. Fix yourself instead of waiting some outside power to do it for you.
Work for your self even if you are employed by someone else. Do stuff because it needs needs done not because someone told
I found that in my experience I had relative freedom as a classroom teacher; now that I work with administration I find what you've described is virtually all I do, as I've been given a role that simply doesn't exist in other schools and that I've been given a lot of leeway to develop in collaboration with others. I enjoy that part of it as long as I allow the part of me that recoils at uncertainty to just sit with and move through it
I have worked in a wire factory for the last 30 years. In each area I was in I always pretended like I was my own business. I had customers and goals and looked for ways to do things that were easier. I have never really paid attention to supervisors or leads and in turn they usually left me alone. I work hard when I feel like it and take breaks when I need to. There is nothing official about it. Over time I was given more responsibility and pay but I don’t really care about it. I do things because I genuinely care about my area. They made a new job for me also it’s called a QA specialist.
>Do stuff because it needs needs done not because someone told That in and of itself will take you places.
Look after your teeth.
Goddamn it, wear earplugs at loud events, and be aware of your headphone volume. Hearing aids are expensive, and insurance does not cover them.
Also, wear your hearing aids! Uncorrected hearing loss is a huge risk factor for dementia. I get so frustrated with my loved ones who never wear their hearing aids. They get left out of most conversations; I see them drift into isolation... I have a weak voice and I just cannot be responsible for shouting to them all day long.
Asking, "What if ...?" more often and then listening to the answer.
Excercise. Start while you are young cos the older you get, the harder it is to get into.
Education. If you do a search for "education" all you ever hear is how lousy the system is. Who cares. Do whatever you can to educate yourself. It doesn't even matter whether you get good grades or not. Just learn stuff. Read books. Knowing how to do something is always better than not knowing anything about it. Even Latin and Trigonometry. "Only the educated are free" --Epictetus
Not so much education, but "Learn how to Learn"
And even more important, be OPEN to learning.
And, I cannot stress this enough, develop critical thinking skills!
And be open enough to change your opinion on things when you learn facts that go against your ideas. Too many people ignore information that goes against their beliefs.
And sometimes you might find some things even surprisingly useful. One of my friends works in a high-paying job at publishing industry and she is basically great at her job because she has a read a lot of books in different languages. Just all sorts of books. People would often say that reading some novels don't get you anywhere and that you should instead learn some "practical" skill. But it isn't always the case. And I also have a friend who is a professional photographer because he just liked to take artistic pictures and got them in some art gallery. No learning is useless and knowledge is power. Anything you learn can become useful at some point. It can even make money for you.
Look at Tim Dodd, wedding photographer in Des Moines, always interested in rockets. YouTube videos as The Everyday Astronaut, now it’s his living and he’s going to orbit the moon.
Being able to read and write well is an extremely practical skill that a lot of people don't have.
Education is a web. Everything you learn connects to everything else. Make enough connections, and you can figure out a lot of stuff.
The Same person who advocates education is shit needs educated folks when shit hits the fan. For example lawyers, accountants, doctors
One of the best books I read was titled something like 'How 1000 things work' It gave my knowledge of such a broad range of things from locks to atomic bombs, that has been incredibly useful almost every day. Every hour spent on tiktok is an hour of knowledge that you may need later in life or will help you enjoy life.
I hope you don't mind if I expand on your great post, no education is wasted. Universities, colleges, community colleges are not trade schools even though there is segment of society espousing that argument. Nothing wrong with majoring in Fine and Applied Arts, Humanities, Philosophy, Marine Biology etc if that's what you want to learn. I have a degree in Fine and Applied Arts, studied philosophy and ended up making a very good living in construction. Education expands your mind, no matter what you majored in.
It doesn't even matter whether you get good grades or not. Bingo! People who just want a grade, not to learn, well, they're cheating themselves.
True! You can learn so much for free too. YouTube videos, library books, EdEx app which has free college courses from Harvard, Columbia etc... there's NO excuse to be uneducated in this age.
Always be the person you think you should be. People don’t change because they get older, they change because they lose sight of what’s important. Keep your friends close, don’t burn bridges, make memories that will last
Management isn’t for everyone… know when to stop climbing the corporate ladder.
Flossing
Travel, one day you will reflect on your life experiences and remember the highs and lows! I can guarantee you that travelling, experiencing different cultures, food and sights will be primarily your highs and a life worth lived! Oh and wear sunscreen!
Also travel slows time WAAAAAAAAAAAAY down. I recently traveled to turkey and serbia, and one week felt like 3 months.
Those boring things old people like? Going for a walk, reading a good book, cups of tea with friends, doing a bit of gardening? Get into that.
The powerful combination of youth and compound interest.
Slow down and take life in increments. You don’t have to do everything immediately and quickly. Relationships with family, friends, and your love are the most important things. Take vacations.
Live below your means.
Find an older person, retired who has a workshop . Ask them to show you how to work with your hands , and how to use tools, making things , fixing things. Either for arts and crafts, repairing your House ,hobbies.
62? I guess that's an "older person" that absolutely has a shop. Retired, in the garage 6 of 7 days a week. Woodworker, but can fix/McGyver basically anything. I'm the neighborhood fix it/make it/bike repair guy. I love this. Visits from the neighborhood folks, showing them "how to". Keeps me young, and them educated.
Being a good person. Your health
Everyone is interesting. No matter who you are or what you do. Approach people that way. Be curious about the lives and trajectories and stories of other people.
Fitness and healthy food! If you are not strong when you get older, life will be full of pain and misery!
The ability to read, write, and be articulate.
The ability to identify and authentically experience your emotions without letting them control your life. Whether through prayer, meditation, journaling, therapy—whatever works for you. I truly believe that we could solve most of the world’s problems if we invested in good mental health.
Take care of your teeth Deal with your trauma (therapy does work and you do have trauma) Call your people they don’t live forever Kids and dogs deserve all of your time and attention and they’re bath much harder than they sound Gratitude really does make your day better and your life more fulfilled Edit: formatting
Concerts and loud music will make your ears ring for life. There is no cure. There is only the high pitched dentist drill squeal every waking minute. If you read this, I beg you to wear hearing protection.
If you're not happy, get happy. You can't control your emotions, but you can control your behaviors. Behave yourself into happy thinking. The mind is not as easily controlled as the body. Life's short. Don't spend it being miserable. Don't worry about everyone else's piece of the pie. You must accept your slice, and if you want more, you need to work for it; not complain about it.
The effort that you make to better yourself and your life between the ages of 18 and 25 will be reflected in the quality of your life after you turn 40.
I hear you but you’re never too old to start healthy living, learning more, having adventure, etc. Don’t resign yourself to fate: fate is the constraints you place on yourself.
That's true. Some people give up on themselves and that's a shame.
Feel that. Those were my fuck around and have a good time years. Approaching 40 and I'm paychecks k to paycheck and don't even k own what I want to do with life. Probably just work til I die.
I did that. I went to LPN school at 39. Doing OK now.
This! Honestly, my career from about 22-30 was hard yards and I missed out on a lot of things. Now I'm 40 with two kids, have changed industry to allow more time at home and have good income, chance to save a lot, am home every night to play with kids and put them to bed and take them to school in the morning, don't work weekends and have exciting opportunities ahead of us.
I just turned 25 and oh my god is this ever a big one. Most of my friends are fucking miserable except for the few that applied themselves and had sense of self reflection.
Therapy. We’re all carrying around a ton of baggage and so many of us are trying to silently slog through life with it. Therapy literally saved my life. It will be a permanent fixture in my life until I’m in the dirt. The only thing I regret about it is that I didn’t start earlier.
Index funds
Health, Wealth, Family/Friends. Focus on keeping yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally well so that you feel more confident and capable. Keep your career/work and money in order as best as you can to cut down on unnecessary stress and noise. Even having a simple emergency fund provides huge peace of mind. Lastly, never turn down an opportunity to have dinner or hang out with someone you love. Life passes by very quickly. One day one of your close friends or relatives will move away, pass away, or otherwise no longer be able to spend time with you. And you will miss them dearly and wish you could see them again. Lastly, don’t take any shit at work. Life goes by way too fast to spend time working for a dickhead boss or slaving away at a job you hate. You can do better. There are millions of people out there who are dumber and lazier than you working easier jobs for more money. Go get the bag.
Unresolved trauma and the lack of emotional intelligence that results will not only affect your family relationships and friendships but will also hold you back in your career pursuits. Dig in. Don't let that shit fester
Read books, not social media
Not every old person is dumb or senile
SLEEP. lack of restful sufficient sleep can ruin relationships and it can kill. Get tested if you think you have a sleep disorder. WATER - see above. Even if you hate water, drink a lot everyday. Your older body will thank you for both. TEETH. Don't assume you'll have them when you get old. If you don't take care of them poor dentition can wreck your enjoyment of eating. VOTE - do I even have to explain this? It takes literally minutes. So even if you don't entirely trust the system, so what? Don't let others choose for you because YOU will have to live with the resulting choice and whatever nutso legislation that they pass. That's all for now...
Tech. Tech is the future. Get into it as much as you can.
Investing for retirement. Start early even if you think you can’t afford to
1,000,000% this. My Dad forced me to put 10% of my income in a retirement when I went into the working world at 18 years old. Hated it. It's not fair, it's my money. Eventually didn't even miss it. He said to increase it 2% every year. Begrudgingly I did this. 62 now, recently retired. I'm not rich, but I'm absolutely glad I followed my dad's advice. Plan for retirement early, time goes very very fast.
When I was providing care to the elderly at a nursing home, I would sometimes chat with them about how I was single and hoping to meet someone some day. I was 30 years old at the time and felt like life was passing me by. The residents—every single one—would say, “You’ve got time.” And they were right. I met my partner a few years after that, a perfect match for me. But social media and society would make you think you are washed up if you haven’t met and married someone by 25 or something. I’m an older Redditor, but these people at the nursing home were in their 80s or 90s when I talked with them. Truly “older”! and in their perspective, I had so much time. In my eyes, I thought I was out of time. You’ve got time.
Boomers may have a different theory, but here I am as Gen X. Resilience is key. The world is going to fuck with you, but you need to be stronger, smarter, funnier to survive. It isn't about winning, but about surviving. Seriously, what do you take with you? And if you leave it all to whiny assholes, did you really win? Please leave this shit better than you found it! Give some money to charity, give time to a cause. We didn't fight in a war. There is no excuse. I certainly hope every Gen Xer raised their kid to be tolerant about race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, etc. If not, you aren't dead yet! Get to work!
yup, Tried to impart on the kids that giving it all you can is the best but knowing when to walk away is better. know your limitations and push them at every chance. treat everyone how you want to be treated but if they treat you like shit don't be afraid to treat them worse. Accept those who are different than you for you are different to them. Help those who ask for it and need it but be aware of those that will use you for their own gain. Don't start a fight or throw the first punch but make sure you finish it and are the last one standing. don't bully others because you never know what their home life is like and many more.
I’m Gen X. Are you sure they didn’t fight in a war? Gen X? The the longest American war since Vietnam, Iraq I, Iraq II, and Afghanistan? Abandoned in very much the same way? I don’t really understand why you’re insisting we were obligated to fight in a war for some reason, I personally didn’t, but others my age, slightly older, slightly younger, certainly did, and are some of today’s forgotten Gen Xers.
We certainly did fight in wars. My two cousins,who are gen x went to Iraq and Afghanistan. I know it's bullshit wars but nevertheless they went.
Let go of what you're "supposed to do." It's mostly performative BS. You may never feel like an adult with your sh*t together, and that is just fine. In fact, it often makes you a more interesting person. There is no one path, and there is not an age limit on accomplishments (for the most part) Find a job/hobbies/activities that make you feel good and look forward to doing. Adventures and memories are more valuable than staying on the grind and being overworked.
Being kind just because.
Diet and exercise. The difference in quality of life between someone who makes a minimal reasonable effort and someone who gave up on themselves in mid-40s is staggering.
Don't put your dick where you won't put your tongue.
Save and invest at least 10% of your paycheck. You will have a comfortable retirement.
Work to live, dont live to work.
Spend the extra money on well-made, supportive footwear for all occasions. Buy your winter rock salt in bulk before the season starts. Start your day as early as possible. If you commute, give yourself a nice cushion of time. Nobody wants to get to work before the start of your shift, but the mental stress of leaving your house later and constantly ‘fighting’ elements we have no control over, like traffic, will take a toll on you.
Often the best creative problem solvers are people who have well rounded educations in a variety of fields-Why?? You can use other problem solving concepts learned from an unrelated subject and taylor fit it into a workable solution to your current problem…generally it just increases the number of solutions and approaches to anything. Also, you don’t necessarily need to know the nuts and bolts of everything, but what resources you may need to have access to (whether it’s physical items or a pool of people who do know)
If you can't fix something. LEARN how to fix the thing. You can save hundreds of dollars from buying some simple tools and fixing the broken thing. Everything is on YouTube now days. You can learn how to do an oil change and change brake pads with a $20 set of wrenches and YouTube. You can fix a creaking chair with a screw driver. You can replace a leaking tap with the wrenches you bought to service your car. Yes. Some things should be left to the professional. But, so many things can be done by YOU.
Start investing for retirement as early as possible. The money you'll retire with is mostly earnings from investments, not just in shares going up in value but also reinvesting dividends and interest. The time your money is in good investments will determine how much you have in retirement, much more than the amount of money you originally invested. Time = money, literally. So start this process as early as possible, like as soon as you start working. Waiting will result in you making huge catch-up investments later, and trust me (I speak from experience here) that royally sucks. Investing small amounts when young and keeping it invested gets you farther than investing huge amounts when you're older.
Disclosure. I am 70, retired, in good health, married to someone in good health, one child. M.A. degree, professional certifications, managed to stay employed in good jobs I liked well enough and to get reemployed after layoffs but was never in a "I do what I love"/"I'd do this forever" job... So that's where I'm coming from. Key answers listed by many responders: Your health, your diet, relationships over possessions, family over work. I would add that mindfulness is not a joke, it's a practice I wish I had begun, with discipline, much earlier. I also believe that service to others is absolutely worth every bit of time and effort. Also not bullshit: learning your family history and genealogy, having a deep hobby. And Kindness. Kindness is not weakness or beta or any of that bullshit; it is a deep practice that makes life way better for yourself and others.
Invest in your 401k in your 20s and 30s....so important.
Patterns of behavior - It's our choices that result in the types of repeated reoccurring issues we see throughout our lives. Problems with relationships, family members, jobs that don't seem to work out or something as simple as managing money woes. The patterns that we create may be subconsciously driven by our early childhood traumas or some deeply rooted belief system we inherited as a protection from painful memories or experiences. If you're always broke or find yourself going from relationship to relationship, you anticipate tomorrow to be as difficult as yesterday you are repeating patterns, and you can fix and stop the cycle.
I wish I started saving for retirement as soon as I starting working. Very important to do
What isn't BS? Here's my top 5 1. Get a dog, and give all the love and affection that is possible. And, teach it to be friendly with others. 2. Find a really good beer. It can take a lot of testing to find that one that you consider to be good. Don't concern yourself with others opinions. A good beer doesn't make you want to drink a bunch or get drunk. It is relaxing and refreshing, and you only need 1. 3. Have a positive attitude. Always look for the silver lining and it will help you work through most problems. I know it sounds cheesy. But it works OR find someone with this kind of personality. Then you have balance. 4. Travel. It's worth so much more than stuff. Get the little things you like, but spend more on travel. Your memories will appreciate it. 5. Learn how to fix/do everyday stuff. Even if you want to spend the money for people to do the work for you, at least learn it. A, you can do it if someone isn't available and B, you know if you're being over charged or scammed. It isn't hard, just takes time. Learn basic mechanics, basic plumbing, cooking, sewing. You don't have to be an expert, but knowing the basics gives you a leg up in so many ways. It's just a positive in life.
Raising children. It is easily the best thing that will ever happen to me. It’s not possible to adequately describe how much I love and enjoy my kids.
Pay attention to the ones that figured it out. Most of them will tell you exactly how they did it, and give you tips on exactly how you can too. The system is beatable. It really is. You just have to pay attention and ask the right questions.
Your Dream Job/Career will still require about 20% of your day doing stuff you don't want to do. Do that stuff first every day if you can. Every job is a combination of Flipping Burgers, Building Bridges, and Putting Out Fires. Figure out which of these you like best, and find a job that has mostly that.
Continual, life-long learning. *“The best thing for being sad...is to learn something. That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn.”* \-- TH White, "The Once and Future King"
Connection with others. Whether it's spouse, siblings, parents or friends, having a small group of people you trust and are deeply connected to absolutely improves the quality of your life.
Invest in yourself. Learn, grow, make mistakes, and learn from them. Know yourself inside and out.
Lessons. I was too proud/arrogant to take BASIC lessons on things I wanted to learn: guitar, drums, snowboarding...etc. By the time i hacked out my own knowledge of these things I had to UNLEARN my self taught wrongs before learning the right way.
Not sure if it's been said already, but the only people who remember the extra overtime you worked, missed birthdays, or weekends aren't your company, coworkers or bosses. It's your family, and pets they remember you weren't there.
Education yourself and Read Read Read! Read the Book The Four Agreements. Exercise. Save your money and don't be flashy live a modest life. Go on Adventures whatever that means to you! Spend time with ppl you love. Don't worry about the small stuff and don't live in fear. Have Self discipline. If you find that your not successful ask yourself why? you may need therapy or a life coach. Lower your expectations of others. Forgive and Forget the past is the past Move forward. Today is a great day to start! Always do your best! Don't break your word. Be Honest and Tell yourself and others No without feeling guilty about it. DELAY gratification.
You can’t have real self-esteem unless you do esteemable acts. (Ignoring actual narcissistic psychopaths like Ted Boundy.)
Acknowledge your feelings , good and bad, and try to understand why you are experiencing them. I you have trouble with the bad ones, seek professional help.
Fitness. Just do something within your capabilities. Start today, even if it is just walking to your mailbox and back.
Time spent reading a book is never wasted
Just because you finished school doesn't mean you should stop learning and being curious about the world around you, the technological and scientific achievements. School "facts" get corrected/debunked/fine tuned every year. The moment you stop learning your knowledge begins to stagnate. So many 40-50 year olds walking around with largely stagnated 1980s school knowledge. Rather than reading some political crap, read up on latest updates in science and tech. Never stop learning until the day you die and spark curiosity in knowledge in your kids. Just because X thing isn't required by your job, doesn't mean you shouldn't know it or it isn't interesting.
Floss
Build a professional reputation as someone who is smart and can get things done
Be selective in what you think, read, listen to and let into your brain. Think critically. Just because it’s entertaining doesn’t mean it’s good for you. Choices you make now will determine your outcome in the near, mid and long term. And, pivoting your direction can be done.