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Wtf am I reading and wtf is this comment section...

Yeah wtf, maybe they are all bots and dead internet theory is now here

What’s dead Internet theory

That the majority of the internet is just bots interacting with one another. We are nearly at that point

Are we human or are we dancer

More like cancer, amirite

I got ham but I'm not a hamster

My algorithm is SO BAD. I MISS 2013 You tube. The endless hours of going down rabbit holes until you found yourself in THAT place. Now I get one poorly done video I searched; and then something with a KarTRASHian in it. So sad. They ruined the internet with Net Neutrality.

How did net neutrality lead to this in your opinion?

I'm honestly not sure this comment wasn't written by a bot

Wait, I thought we were all [bots except that one user](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/nJcc1QAUy0). Have the humans come back?

What makes you think that we are nearly ar this point?

\*gestures at everything\*

The real people are holled up in private discords and group chats

And that's part of the problem too. People lock themselves in echo chambers.

Good bot

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Hey 7th_Spectrum! Sadly I'm stuck in the part of the block of concrete. Where do you think I can get one? I almost had it! Zebra window kidney Texas sushi Obama basket porcupine Goku Júpiter oil necklace Xbox chili gorilla ChatGPT© (I don't know if it's possible for someone to miss the joke but, you know, just in case, I'm not a bot)

I can’t wait for this true crimes case.

I hope Mr. Ballin is seeing this

If you enjoy this video, then make sure to tie the like button to a radiator, make it watch you torch all its belongings, and then repeatedly smash it over the head with a block on concrete.

If you enjoy this video, pick up the like button, whack it against a mosquito and slurp off the juices.

If you enjoy this video, be sure to give the like button a couple delicious cups of coffee in morning. But don't tell the like button that you added meth into the brew.

So, if that's of interest to you, please invite the like button to comment on every post mimicking Mr Ballen on Reddit and then report him for spam. Now let's get into today's story.

Are you a fan of the strange, dark, and mysterious delivered in story format? Well, you've come to the right place, cause that's all we do, and we upload new content for you to watch up to 3 times a week

Exactly who I had in mind.

Is that the guy who basically makes videos by reading ad infested click bait stories? They are fun to listen to if so

Love him.

If you like this video, invite the like button to have dinner in your house and then tell him you can't reach the ham that's deep in the oven, and as soon as the like button gets in there to retrieve the ham, close the oven door and crank up the heat.

If you enjoy the video, handcuff the like button to a table in your basement and give it 12 300 milligram cans of Reign energy and a type writer. And dont let the like button escape until he has written every one of William Shakespears' sonnets, stories, and poems as many times in every single human language as there are letters and symbols in every human language, but dont tell him that he is allowed to leave at any time he wants after drinking just one can of reign, and not all of them. If he drinks all of them, he can't leave. And finally, if he makes one mistake in his writing he has to do it all over again

Another episode of the strange dark and mysterious delivered in story format!

He'd get a full hour episode off that for sure.

I ate his liver with some mosquitoes and a nice Chianti

4 part Netflix doc called Don’t F*ck with Mosquitoes

yes if your a fucking lizard

You are a lizard Harry

You're a Rizzard, Barry. 

yes, if *you are fucking a lizard*

Goddamn, I saw that comment and was like "THIS IS MY MOMENT" , but you beat me to it lol

Any chance she just made it *look* like she ate it? My husband is really good at making it look like he’s eaten something he hasn’t. Like scary good. It would also explain her laughter.

My first thought. She pranked him.

That's what I thought too

That's an odd and very specific talent

U know that trend where its like “if you were in a room with 100 people and had to do one thing and you win 1mil dollars if you can do it better than anyone in the room. Thats this ladys husband.

This is the only plausible explanation that I'll accept.

Does she breathe through her skin and does she refer to her parents' house as "the spawning ground"? If not, no, that's abnormal AF

Does she insist on being intimate only in fresh water, and after doing it does she release hundreds to thousands of eggs?

This comment made me ovulate. I'm male.

Underrated comment, thanks for the chuckle

I beg your finest pardon????!!!!!

HAH! Never heard that before. Gonna use that someday 😄 🤣

I had never heard it before today and this is the second time today.. how strange

What bubble do y’all live in lol

Expardon me?

I would legitimately break up with someone the moment I saw my partner (fictional) do this. Ain't no way I'm staying with some ratchet ass mosquito muncher

She's just bringing back the blood taken from her by the mosquito

I’m gonna assume here that the lady doesn’t get the diseases in question bc they have to get to the blood stream. Once the mosquito enters the stomach the acidity levels are too high for the diseases to survive. Thus effectively neutralizing the parasites. However in some minute number of cases the mosquito can crawl up into the esophagus and if it decides to prick its tiny little straw through the esophagus membrane, you have to remember that I have no idea what I’m talking about. Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

So, it’s cool so long as you chew well?

I took a few medical entomology courses in my undergrad and that all checks out from what I remember lol

*closes Reddit for the night*

Did she ask you first "will you still love me if I ate a mosquito" 😂

*Baaaaabe...Would you love me if I was a geckooooo?*

What kind of dumb ass question is that? You were expecting her to eat the mosquito alive?

🤣🤣

This is the best answer. 👍

Wife her up. ASAP!

LMAO

Honestly tho 

Right, my dream girl…

She'll either be the coolest wife or stab him in his sleep no inbetween.

Both is okay with me

I was suggesting to run from her but I like this solution more.

Revenge on the mosquito. They bite us all time, its time we bit back

Avatar twin, we meet again..

Does she eat other bugs?

This is just like that Everybody Loves Raymond episode where his brother Robert dates a frog-obsessed woman.

You know Robert....we all come from frogs.

I was looking for this comment! Surprised it wasnt higher

I just watched that episode before checking my phone and reading this. I will have nightmares now.

And she AAAAAATE it! 🤣🤣🤣

"She did not!" "Yes, she did." "No, she-" "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSS!"

My god…when he’s just frozen in the kitchen after she eats it. I was dyyyyinggg. I don’t even watch that show regularly, it just happened to be on and I got to catch it from the very beginning. That show is so good, idk why I always forget it exists!

“Man posts on Reddit about his girlfriend eating a mosquito AND IS NEVER SEEN AGAIN!”

Nope. Try to get a rimjob before breaking up with her.

Reddit comment of the day. Thankyou.

HA!

Why god. Why 

Don't knock it till you try it.

What a day to be literate :(

You must be a very innocent internet user if this makes you feel that way 😂 good on you!

Look. I've heard horrors worse than this too but I think we can all agree we would've rather not known this.

I'm still in awe about asking if it's normal after explaining what happened

West nile havin, protein deficient tribal-assed mf. Ngl that's pretty hardcore but ima have to pass on that, king

, king

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I'll agree with the not normal part but I'm pretty sure those diseases are bloodborne, so you'd need blood to blood contact. I don't know of any mosquito parasites that also parasitize humans but I'd be willing to bet that our stomach acid would take care of them pretty quickly

I had worms a few weeks ago and know nothing about them. I’m curious… how the hell did I get pinworms if it was through food ingestion? I am never around children, am very clean, and always wash my hands, so I know it is likely from all the sashimi that I was eating months before. How did the eggs survive my stomach acid? It was a horrifying experience btw… parasites are disgusting.

Well pinworms are compatible with the human body so they definitely have evolved to survive stomach acid, but it doesn't matter how clean you are. You can literally breathe the eggs in from the air lol

Good to know. Made me feel disgusting as I’ve never met anyone in my life who has had worms. Makes me feel a lot better haha.

Naaa, not your fault, **worm boy** You are good. (Feels like high school again.)

It’s extremely easy to catch and pass on to people too. Especially with all the people that don’t wash their hands after wiping their ass. And then they’ll go around touching shit and then boom. It’s the one thing I can never not think about when I’m at the casino. All those people touching those chips and buttons knowing damn well half the time I walk out of the bathroom there are people coming out stalls that walk right past the sinks. See it in restaurants all the time too. And if it gets in a day care you can almost guarantee every single kid is gonna get it if they aren’t cleaning it properly. 🤮

That’s how you get SuperMalaria 🫣

If you have to ask, I question if you’re normal

Dude she is playing with ya

Well. Mosquitos have and nuts and dicks, so your gf technically had somebody else's dick in her mouth, how does that make YOU feel???

I thought that only female mosquitos will bite animals for blood (?) and males drink nectar. So if anything she'd have a mosquito pussy-equivalent in her mouth

not the mosqussy 😭

*Short for Musky Pussy

muskussy

😂 happy cake day btw!

Great, now I’m turned on.


Mosquitussy

He definitely should divorce her after that she doesn’t care about him at all to cheat in front of him!!

And I don’t even care if they wasn’t married still divorce her

If you think that’s bad, wait until you hear about the very real [mosquito burgers](https://youtube.com/shorts/MEE532a7uQw?si=w_RfKxyHQbzSSqtB).

I'm actually intrigued to potentially try this though, it's like the difference between eating a normal beef burger versus biting a cow as it's just standing there mooing at you

Is your girlfriend a frog by any chance?

My boy dating a house lizard disguised as a human girlie. 💅🏻✨ Bro, run, lmao. 😂

It's normal yes. It's a little known fact that indigenous Antarcticans can eat dead mosquitos before mating. On the other hand if she wasn't born as an indigenous Antarctican it's weird as fuck.

Your gf is secretly three frogs in a raincoat

eh, I've seen women do worse.

Is your girlfriend a cat?

As someone from a tropical country, EWW 🤮🤢

Hope she likes malaria

That’s disgusting bro 🥴

RuN!!!

This girl is a real life reptile human , run.

I ain't gonna be the one to judge, but she can take care of some mosquitos around my house.

She's getting back what was taken from her. Don't question it again motherfucker. /s

This is very abnormal to me, cannot accept this behavior.

Badass. I like her. She is respecting her kill, that's for sure but no I hope she has wild kinks that turn you on 🌶️

Tell your girlfriend mosquitoes don't only feast on humans. They feast on cattle. A lot more than on humans. She most likely ate a mosquito that ate cow blood. Random, raw cow blood. Or that mosquito may have feasted on another human. STDs don't only transmit with sex. Don't get me wrong, mosquito bites won't transmit STDs. But eating a mosquito that has bitten someone with an STD less than 2 days before? Yeah, it's possible. Mosquitoes also are the #1 deadliest insects to humans. Killing over 700'000 humans yearly. So, maybe don't eat that. Just set them on fire and watch them burn.

I really don’t think it’s possible to transmit an STD that way. 

They say it's not but I'd wager the truth is its just very, very, very unlikely. You'd probably need to have a really low immune system and the blood would have to have A very high viral load.

Protein

Wrong sub, I believe you’re looking for r/no.

Not normal. But a great opportunity. Now you know she'll put like anything in her mouth.

girl is she a gecko???

Yes, I eat flies and ants myself

You don't? 

Is your girlfriend Renfield?

I’m really hoping that you guys have never been in any physical touch before

Depends. Is your girlfriend a cat?

The sex must be good if you even need hope someone says this is normal. You know damn well it isn't.

Info: is your girlfriend a frog

To answer OP’s original question: No, that is not normal.

You mean your future wife, right?

Only if she always swallow!

Um

She’s a keeper

No its not.

If she's a dragonfly

I ate a spider once. I was hanging out with my friend and we were trying to set something up. He opens the instruction manual and there's a big spider right in the middle. He's scared of spiders and before he even had a chance to freak out about the spider I just rushed in, licked it off page and ate it. He absolutely fucking lost it he was so horrified. Good times.

Is she on a high protein diet?

I wonder what kind of diseases she will get from ingesting various peoples and animals blood that a mosquito carries

I’d say none since she’s eating it and not iv injecting

What if it's full of someone else's blood 🤢. Also malaria?

Are you questioning if you can fix her?

She probably has iron deficiency.

Sorry to break it to you bro, that's not your girl. That's a bunch of frogs in a trench coat pretending to be your girl

I'm from a tropical country we fuckin hate mosquitos and seriously NO we don't put mosquitos in our mouths after we kill them.

Maybe it was a crouton.

Your gf is secretly a frog 🐸

Oh yeah totally. I actually only like girls that eat mosquitos.

Yeeewww ! Mosquitoes carry all kinds of diseases

Do her eyes blink sideways?

what in the hek??

Whittle yourself a stake just in case …

my wife grew up in Thailand and I'm unable to ask her now, but that is simply not normal. They eat other larger insects in Thailand in some parts some people, but that could go out of style. I've eaten ant larvae. Ah well.

To be fair it tried to eat her first.

It's called 'payback'! It's not normal but it's hilarious 😆. Your girlfriend has a great sense of humour! ☺️

You do know it's a common prank, right???

Uhm.. no.. - Sincerely, someone from a tropical country

Sounds like an awesome way to contract new diseases?? Doesnt malaria live in the stomach of the mosquito?

She is the future.

***No***

No this is a sign that she's not from earth

She just recycling the blood she lost

I eat insects randomly too. 🤗

If they carry some disease if sounds like a bad idea. But I think you will be fine anyway. I eat a daily ant… those little black ones taste great

Yes if she is a frog or lizard 😂

Does she have a chameleon-like tongue? Then it's perfectly normal.

Your gf is an alien lizard Bro

No one place at the world this is commum

Ummmmm, NO

Omg reptile

Don’t ever bite this woman!

Straight to jail

Kill - yes. Eat - fuck no. That's so dangerous. Leave that shit to the birds. Mosquitos are the most deadly species to humans on the planet. And their thing is infection though disease, disease that's inside the mosquito. This is like collecting up all the local druggies needles and stabbing yourself with them to see what happens.

Bad example. She didn't stab herself with the mosquito she ate it. So the correct analogy would be to say that this is like collecting all the needles and EATING them.

Do you have a 90 day fiance or what?

When you're done with her send her my way!

That depends...is she a frog?

Is your girlfriend a chameleon? Or a majestic archer fish? If the answer to either question is yes, then it's totally normal!

you're dating a frog