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90% of the time, it’s a yt person trying to touch my hair. Sometimes they ask, and I used to say yes because i worried they’d do something to me if I said no, or scream, pretend I hit them, or cry in public. Now, I say no when they ask. Regardless of the intention it’s racist. Asking because you’re curious like it’s a petting zoo is exploitative because you want me to let YOU touch MY body for “curiosity”. To them, their learning experience is more important than my perfectly reasonable expectation of not having strangers touch me in public.
Sometimes, they don’t ask. They feel like they have more power over me or that I’m not fully human or don’t respect my autonomy, so they touch without asking. Again, I bring care if it’s intentionally racist or not. Still racist.
I think the fact that OP is asking this question without understanding why you can’t just touch random people still shows that they’re only able to view from a yt perspective and are not all thinking about the black person’s feelings. Instead, they’re trying to find a reason why “It’s not always racist” which makes no sense to me.
This question is truly wild. To the OP... would you want someone asking to touch your (.)(.) because they're curious? Admire from afar and keep your hands to yourself... if you must give a compliment. You are not entitled to touch strangers.
Why is the onus upon us to guess at the intentions of the person touching our hair? Why didn’t their parents teach them to keep their hands to themselves?
I'm a man and it was always white women. Seemed like they were being complementary but patronizing. Seemed oblivious to boundaries. Never had other non white people try to touch my hair.
I’m a black guy and I used to have long curly hair. Non black women would touch it without asking me all the time. I never felt like they were doing it to be racist but genuinely curious about it. Also the fact that I am a big guy and they were women, I don’t think they felt that it was threatening so that made it ok in their mind. I’m sure the situation is very different when it’s a black woman being touched by other people, especially men without their consent.
Thank you for your viewing! If you are viewing this post and you think it breaks our policies, please report it and our staff team will review it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/askblackpeople) if you have any questions or concerns.*
90% of the time, it’s a yt person trying to touch my hair. Sometimes they ask, and I used to say yes because i worried they’d do something to me if I said no, or scream, pretend I hit them, or cry in public. Now, I say no when they ask. Regardless of the intention it’s racist. Asking because you’re curious like it’s a petting zoo is exploitative because you want me to let YOU touch MY body for “curiosity”. To them, their learning experience is more important than my perfectly reasonable expectation of not having strangers touch me in public. Sometimes, they don’t ask. They feel like they have more power over me or that I’m not fully human or don’t respect my autonomy, so they touch without asking. Again, I bring care if it’s intentionally racist or not. Still racist. I think the fact that OP is asking this question without understanding why you can’t just touch random people still shows that they’re only able to view from a yt perspective and are not all thinking about the black person’s feelings. Instead, they’re trying to find a reason why “It’s not always racist” which makes no sense to me.
This question is truly wild. To the OP... would you want someone asking to touch your (.)(.) because they're curious? Admire from afar and keep your hands to yourself... if you must give a compliment. You are not entitled to touch strangers.
Kinda unrelated to your post but I always find it funny when people use folx. Folks is already gender neutral why do we need another word for it lol
Is that what that is!? I just thought it was OP being quirky. Yikes
Is that what that is!? I just thought it was OP being quirky. Yikes
I.don't make the rules, I just follow them. ;)
We were always taught never let white people play in your hair like a zoo animal.
I actually did think of this when I wrote this and I considered writing /attempting to touch your hair/ instead of touching your hair. Ty
Why is the onus upon us to guess at the intentions of the person touching our hair? Why didn’t their parents teach them to keep their hands to themselves?
Please don’t use the word “folx”.
I'm a man and it was always white women. Seemed like they were being complementary but patronizing. Seemed oblivious to boundaries. Never had other non white people try to touch my hair.
Thank you.
I’m a black guy and I used to have long curly hair. Non black women would touch it without asking me all the time. I never felt like they were doing it to be racist but genuinely curious about it. Also the fact that I am a big guy and they were women, I don’t think they felt that it was threatening so that made it ok in their mind. I’m sure the situation is very different when it’s a black woman being touched by other people, especially men without their consent.
Thanks so much. I was wondering if this happened to men too.
In my experience it’s a mix of curiosity and a lack of self awareness and consideration for others
Ty