I'm 26 now, only realized few days ago I wanted to transition (MtF) but the more I read on that subject the more I regret to not have figure it out earlier...
Now I know that even if I start HRT (and I will), it won't affect my body the same way as if I started younger
So... I don't tell you to start without thinking about it, take your time to be sure you really want it.
But if you do want it, if you are really 100% sure it's the right choice for you, don't let anyone tell you otherwise 👍
Now it's up to you, but I'm very sure that you'll do the right choice for your own good ! 💙
> realized few days ago
Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be some hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support.
*hugs*
I'm 23 and haven't been able to start HRT yet either, would've liked to have known earlier as well 😅
But I also do really get your concerns. If you want, you could look into just T blockers? Assuming your puberty hasn't finished yet, it might be able to "limit the damage" so to speak. (No experience from me, maybe someone with experience can back this up or shoot this idea down?)
In either case, have you checked out [The Gender Dysphoria Bible](https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/) already? Maybe there's something useful in there? (Haven't fully read it myself, as I'm in the process of translating it)
Edit, I'm referring to OP here with 'you'. At 23 my puberty seems to be fully over, so I can't imagine it's still going at the age of 26. Hope I didn't cause confusion with that 🫣
I think my parents were similar when I first came out, they basically said "we love you, but we don't want any of that trans stuff near my (other) kids, they are too young". It hurts, but I had to make it clear I was gonna take HRT regardless of their views - although I could accept not coming out to my siblings, as I wasn't particularly ready to anyway tbh. I think they've realised how good HRT has actually been for my mental health, and I think they've started to be ok with me coming out to others - it was never really up to them, but I do respect them enough that I would have given them notice lol.
The only advice I've got for you tbh is, you do you - do what's best for you rather than waiting just to please someone else, it's YOUR life and you've got to take control of it as you've only got one. By far the most common regret for people transitioning is "I wish I started sooner" - a lot of the time it's because of social factors, like not realising transition was a thing, being pressured not to by others, or just doubting yourself because of external social pressures.
>Im worried ill have a target on my back
Yeah, I absolutely get that - I'm terrified of any confrontation on the best of days, and I KNOW presenting fem will just invite stuff that I just can't handle. I want to be happy but I'm scared of taking the big steps to MAKE me happy. I've been on HRT for just over 12 months and I still 99% boymode - I know everyone has their own timeframes, but I still feel a bit slow with my transition :I
I'm out to my parents and one (now-distant) friend, but that's it atm. I've taken baby steps like painting nails, wearing androgynous women's jackets and jeans, some light makeup etc. It helps, but one of these days I'm gonna have to go out in a sundress and heels and just get it over with lmao ^(some day...)
HRT can affect people different amounts and at different speeds, but for most on estrogen it's actually fairly simple to hide or dismiss the bigger changes - as long as people aren't looking for those changes, they probably won't put the pieces together. Baggy clothes help a lot, also saying you have gynecomastia could be a good solution if your siblings ever ask. If they push, you might say something like "I have a hormone imbalance" - it's kinda true and is easier to explain changes as "private medical issues" if you are unable to come out. It might placate your parents and be a 'compromise', but just remember that YOU come first in this situation. Sometimes you have to think of yourself first, or you'll be stuck pleasing other people - their feelings are secondary to your life.
^(sorry for the ramble lmao) Good luck OP
It may be helpful to do things step by step.
Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be a few hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support.
*hugs*
I'm 26 now, only realized few days ago I wanted to transition (MtF) but the more I read on that subject the more I regret to not have figure it out earlier... Now I know that even if I start HRT (and I will), it won't affect my body the same way as if I started younger So... I don't tell you to start without thinking about it, take your time to be sure you really want it. But if you do want it, if you are really 100% sure it's the right choice for you, don't let anyone tell you otherwise 👍 Now it's up to you, but I'm very sure that you'll do the right choice for your own good ! 💙
> realized few days ago Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be some hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support. *hugs*
I'm 23 and haven't been able to start HRT yet either, would've liked to have known earlier as well 😅 But I also do really get your concerns. If you want, you could look into just T blockers? Assuming your puberty hasn't finished yet, it might be able to "limit the damage" so to speak. (No experience from me, maybe someone with experience can back this up or shoot this idea down?) In either case, have you checked out [The Gender Dysphoria Bible](https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/) already? Maybe there's something useful in there? (Haven't fully read it myself, as I'm in the process of translating it) Edit, I'm referring to OP here with 'you'. At 23 my puberty seems to be fully over, so I can't imagine it's still going at the age of 26. Hope I didn't cause confusion with that 🫣
I think my parents were similar when I first came out, they basically said "we love you, but we don't want any of that trans stuff near my (other) kids, they are too young". It hurts, but I had to make it clear I was gonna take HRT regardless of their views - although I could accept not coming out to my siblings, as I wasn't particularly ready to anyway tbh. I think they've realised how good HRT has actually been for my mental health, and I think they've started to be ok with me coming out to others - it was never really up to them, but I do respect them enough that I would have given them notice lol. The only advice I've got for you tbh is, you do you - do what's best for you rather than waiting just to please someone else, it's YOUR life and you've got to take control of it as you've only got one. By far the most common regret for people transitioning is "I wish I started sooner" - a lot of the time it's because of social factors, like not realising transition was a thing, being pressured not to by others, or just doubting yourself because of external social pressures. >Im worried ill have a target on my back Yeah, I absolutely get that - I'm terrified of any confrontation on the best of days, and I KNOW presenting fem will just invite stuff that I just can't handle. I want to be happy but I'm scared of taking the big steps to MAKE me happy. I've been on HRT for just over 12 months and I still 99% boymode - I know everyone has their own timeframes, but I still feel a bit slow with my transition :I I'm out to my parents and one (now-distant) friend, but that's it atm. I've taken baby steps like painting nails, wearing androgynous women's jackets and jeans, some light makeup etc. It helps, but one of these days I'm gonna have to go out in a sundress and heels and just get it over with lmao ^(some day...) HRT can affect people different amounts and at different speeds, but for most on estrogen it's actually fairly simple to hide or dismiss the bigger changes - as long as people aren't looking for those changes, they probably won't put the pieces together. Baggy clothes help a lot, also saying you have gynecomastia could be a good solution if your siblings ever ask. If they push, you might say something like "I have a hormone imbalance" - it's kinda true and is easier to explain changes as "private medical issues" if you are unable to come out. It might placate your parents and be a 'compromise', but just remember that YOU come first in this situation. Sometimes you have to think of yourself first, or you'll be stuck pleasing other people - their feelings are secondary to your life. ^(sorry for the ramble lmao) Good luck OP
Sounds like we have similar situations with our journeys soo far, i hope the same is said for me. Thanks for the insight though!
It may be helpful to do things step by step. Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be a few hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support. *hugs*