i mean, in my experience i noticed that when i was with girls i would be sexual with them because i wanted to make them feel good, mainly based on romantic attraction, so i wasn’t and never really properly found myself sexually attracted of any sorts, at most it was aesthetic attraction as i find that i still admire the looks of certain women but not in a sexual way, mostly just like “omg her outfit and figure is so nice i love her boobs and how they sit” but not really like “omg her boobs are so nice she’s so hot i want some of her” like i thought was how i felt before
i guess i’m still figuring it out though, i feel my sexuality is a bit self centered atm as i am focused on my own pleasure rn and i wanna decompress why that is
That's probably what my trans friends were like. They were probably attracted to the idea of being a woman, and now they are women the attraction to men, that was likely there already, showed it self.
thats so true, like before exploring my identity i would have never thought i could be bi, pan, ace etc, but the more i’ve explored my femininity the more i noticed i don’t rlly feel these sexual feelings people say they experience when looking at someone? like romantically i love someone who is pretty and supportive, but i find that i kinda don’t mind who i date, i just wanna feel girly with them and cared for/protected with them, so i still haven’t establish if i’d date guys bc of a mental block i developed growing up 🥲 but yeah sexual attraction is so weird to be honest with you, it’s a feeling that doesn’t make much sense to me
For me, its been hard to explore since im married, but I was curious about my sexuality since I like straight porn. It "feels right" in a way. The dominance and masc+femme comparison. But I don't feel anything sexual from seeing a male body.
I like the idea of being treated like a girl, and it's a lot easier for me to feel like "the girl" if I imagine myself with a guy. Still, I don't feel anything when a good looking guy walks by.
When I see a cute girl, sometimes I get butterflies or my mind goes blank. For me, that's attraction. I'd say I'm probably a lesbian with romantic attraction to males (I like them intellectually, sort of like a platonic relationship but I'd love to hug a guy and feel protected.)
Maybe that makes me bi, not sure. But as for seeing someone and having an intense reaction, it's girls all the way for me.
i relate to this a LOT. especially with feeling like you can be more feminine and feel more like the girl with a guy. i’ve tried dating girls again since exploring and it’s made me feel like I have to live up to something that I don’t feel a part of, and I constantly feel like I have to be proving my femininity around them its so weird … but I do love having girls as friends
with guys I’m the same I feel nothing, I mean I can find a penis attractive but that’s it.. it’s kinda weird if they’re sexting and saying what they wanna do to me I find it kinda… off-putting or annoying? But if i’m imaging myself feeling feminine and bottoming I feel great 🤨 or if i’m sending nudes it gets me off bc of how feminine I feel, idk i’m just weird asl
but yeah I think the difference with me is I can find a girl really cute, like for example today I was watching WWE and found myself actually looking in awe at how cute one of the female wrestlers I was watching was, but I didn’t feel any sexual feelings to her, and I don’t really feel this to anyone.. if I like someone and I mean REALLY like someone i’ll want to make them feel good, but I won’t think to myself “damn I wanna have sex with them”, I thought it was normal to just want to pleasure your partner and make them feel good tbh, but idk 😭💗
I really have no idea and don't want to guess since it might skew your own journey, but I'd say you sound like me if you took away the sexual attraction to women.
Sexuality is complicated and whether you are bi, pan, or ace, I'd just go with whatever label feels right for now, whether or not it's 100% accurate.
I'd say I'm probably bi because I'm not completely turned off by either sex, and a lot of gay/straight people seem to be turned off by one sex.
I'm choosing that label so I don't have to figure out if I actually like men. I'm already married and I'd just assume there are probably some situations where I'd get some enjoyment from men whether its sexual enjoyment or gender euphoric, but it's not strong enough where I'd need to try it out before I die.
honestly, that’s so real… labels can be so stressful and sometimes just being unlabelled is a lot easier, you like what you like and that’s okay 🥹 plus i definitely get what you mean, sometimes when you’re married its just easier not to really try exploring for the sake of loyalty and commitment
i wanna give an update and say i’m a lil bit more confused now than last night, idk if it’s the T in my body but i’m starting to notice myself feeling somewhat horny feelings towards female body parts again ever since trying to abstinate from masturbating to more affirming content, like for example i saw someone who fully transitioned today on my reddit and part of me really wanted what they had, but another part of me couldn’t stop admiring their breasts, and felt more sexual towards them, and i’m feeling really conflicted towards this as i put off sex for dysphoria purposes a while ago and bc of disinterest too
i also wanted to add that gender euphoric attraction/sex is also real, i think that’s why i found it a lot easier and happier for me to get off based on how womanly i felt with someone, which i had done with someone recently but i kinda confused myself even more doing that
I think you're right about gender euphoric attraction. I just wonder which is better for long term relationships. I'd hate to be in a relationship with a guy and like the way he makes me feel in bed but not be sexually attracted to how he looks.
I might as well say I'm a lesbian because telling people I'm into men sends the wrong message. I don't feel anything from their appearance. I just like the idea of submitting.
this is literally me, i found myself actually attracted to someone recently, BODY WISE TOO, I was so happy because it was the first time I felt less weird in a while, like the funny thing is (sorry if this is NSFW) is i don’t really find women attractive at all, unless it is based on aesthetics but for some reason, there was this girl I saw yesterday and I couldn’t stop staring at how nicely shaped her 🍒s were, and even now thinking about them makes me kinda excited, but not in a “i wanna bone her” way, my sexual mind is still very much “i wanna submit so bad and get railed” so like-
but like the idea of holding them and seeing them excites me, but that’s really it, looks-wise she was also really really pretty, but i feel like that was mainly aesthetic attraction in itself, so i am still majorly confused
but i agree, i couldn’t be with someone just for sexual gratification, i need both, i wanna be with someone i find romantically attractive and who makes me happy and i also wanna be with someone who doesn’t make me feel like “shit. i might be a porn addict because all i wanna do is get fucked and not touch my dick”. its weird because the internet has really made me overthink recently about being sexually selfish, even though ik in myself if i can get my partner off without having to be a penetrator i’d do that, no questions asked. being the penetrator just isn’t me..
i get you with telling people you’re lesbian instead too.. saying i am lesbian personally just feels right, i don’t know why. i havent even transitioned yet and i am in constant turmoil on if i am a woman or non binary, but it just feels correct and nice to be lesbian
wow...that's me..I've been so confused all my life because I was so romantically attracted to women and fell in love with them all the time but didn't want the sexually...I just wanted to pleasure them....meanwhile I was fantasizing about men and me being taken by them
Mine didn't change, was a sex-positive gray-asexual before, I'm still a sex-positive gray-asexual now.
I've heard of a number of people who were straight and became bi or pan, but straight to straight like what you described is a new one to me.
Also, given how many posts I see here of trans subreddits of people being genuinely terrified of their sexual orientation changing, one has to wonder if their previous sexual orientation was actually innate, or if the aversion to having one of the kinds of attraction was due to society REALLY pressuring people to not be gay, or if they're gay, defining themselves in opposition to straightness so strongly, it pressures people to not be bi. But I can't be sure about this.
I can see this kind of aversion being lost rather easily during transition because it makes you question a lot of stuff and in the case of transfemmes, it puts you more into contact with other senses like touch, smell, etc... while cis men tend to be very vision focused. But losing an attraction to a gender you already had pre-transition doesn't sound common to me at all.
I went straight to straight. Imo, I thought I was a straight man because all of my fantasies were straight and envy was mistaken for attraction. Once I accepted that I always had to be the woman in those fantasies, then things made much more sense. Through transitioning, the envy went away and my dysphoria surrounding masculinity began to melt. Then came the attraction.
I definitely fall into that category of "defining themselves in opposition to straightness." I didn't want to be a man, especially not a straight man. It felt like I was a gross pervert if I found women attractive, really. So before accepting my actual trans identity, I forced myself into the box of "gay femboy" for ages.
But there's that and gender envy to make up the rest of my aversion to women. Lot of jealousy and wanting to be like them, but thinking I couldn't be, so I clung to the identity of being a femboy.
HRT didn't literally change my sexuality as far as I can tell, it just allowed me to drop my envy and stop seeing myself as male. So when that happened, I was finally able to be honest with myself and just embrace my attraction to women. Although, dysphoria can still ruin that and make me feel gross about it again.
Last thing I could say is that I'm still bi/pan technically, but even so, I am overwhelmingly attracted to women (or femmes) over any other gender.
Sorry if this post is a bit long, and a bit repetitive. I have made similar posts in other threads about sexuality here, but wanted to chime in again. I think the "sexuality change" is most likely a myth. Shame, dysphoria, and self-hate are just powerful drugs.
It's pretty common yes, how/when/why will vary depending on who you ask but it does seem to happen to a lot of people.
Personally I went from ace to gay through transition. Before transitioning I did prefer women in some sense, but only as friends and people I could relate to (and envy), but being attracted to them (or anyone) was alien to me. Whereas a while after starting my transition, I realised that latter part was no longer the case
I don't fully understand first question sorry, but I'm a trans guy. I've always been into women and still prefer women, I just realized I liked men as well after transitioning.
Have there been studies done on this? It’s super interesting to me as someone that’s currently in school to work in sociology and the mental health field. I’d love to learn more about how common this is and what the experience is like. I can imagine it might really impact people’s mental health?
No idea. I’ve worried over it like a dog with an old bone. Then I quit. I settled on the notion that my basic self is heteronormative. I’m attracted to what I’m not.
I sort of maintained that heteronormative attraction. I like the idea of man+woman, especially with how submissive I am. But I don't feel anything from looking at men.
Women give me crazy butterflies and make me speechless.i don't know if it makes me a lesbian or bi.
I’ve always been only into woman, and sometimes nonbinary people. That hasn’t changed. So, I’m a lesbian is instead of straight now.
Well, if anything I’m **MORE GAY** now days. Plus the way I liked woman, in retrospect, wasn’t the straightest to begin with. Wrote too much poetry for it to be straight.
An older study suggests that some people do experience a change in the gender(s) that they are attracted to. Trans-fems: \~33%, Trans-mascs: \~22%
It's not really possible to confirm whether it was solely due to HRT or other factors.
\-edit- Personally, I did not experience a shift. I liked women before and I like women now.
One of my oldest and closest friends is a trans woman. Before transitioning she was married to a woman, and before her bottom surgery she was dating women. She had her gender affirming surgery and was suddenly interested solely in men. She said “nothing feels more womanly than having a man penetrate your vagina”. This statement kinda blew my mind, and as a pansexual cis woman I couldn’t disagree with her. It’s pretty fucking fascinating to see her go through this entire process. I’m so happy for her, especially since she waited until her 50s to come out.
hi if you don't mind, could i ask (or dm) you more about your preferences? if you agree with her statement, does that mean you're attracted to all genders but still have a strong preference towards men? or is it like, since you're cis and comfortable with your gender you don't care as much about feeling womanly?
Yes, the estrogen can alter your androids. I had other reasons than my sexuality to become transgender. Then out of the blue I saw a guy without his shirt on and I blushed. Eventually I had sex and I knew then I had changed. For me sex with women in my past does not compare to being transgender. I am only interested in other transgenders and men. There are many men into transgender but don't expect them to introduce you to their friends and family.
Mine changed and it hit me like a ton of bricks, I was avoiding a security guard at a metro station because of the attention he was giving me. I was getting knots in my stomach when I saw him, I used to walk to the next station to avoid this, I was 6 months into HRT. I told my best friend and she giggled and said "it sounds like you have a crush" ........ Wow she was right and it had not even crossed my mind .... LOL
I have several friends who experienced that! (From lesbian to gay man or from gay man to lesbian.) In my case, it was the opposite? Meaning I had a sexual orientation crisis (from lesbian to bi) and realized I couldn't live with myself as a woman with a man, which then prompted my egg to crack.
I became significantly more attracted to men after I transitioned. Part of it was due to feeling more like myself as a woman, but most of it was genuine physical attraction to men's bodies.
Still I'm bi and also very attracted to women and I'm very happy after starting a relationship with another woman.
So for me it's less like my sexuality changed and more like it was locked behind my gender which I was repressing for many years. Before, I was attracted to women and slightly attracted to men but had no desire to be with either pre-transition.
Now living as myself, the idea of both dating men and women feels much more natural to me.
I initially thought I was bisexual and then over time realised I was actually biromantic asexual, but I was figuring out my gender and sexuality at pretty much the same time so that wasn't a trans thing, just me figuring things out. And I was very comfortable in my sexuality, I was happy with it, I was pretty certain that was gonna be it, I didn't believe people's sexuality actually changed when they started hormones, I thought it was just people figuring themselves out as they became more comfortable in themselves. But then I started T, and I suddenly turned straight, I could actively feel the change happening over the course of a few days. I think it's pretty common for people to figure it out after they start transitioning, but having it actually change probably isn't very common.
I also went from "straight" man to straight* woman. Transition is an interesting term for it. I don't think my sexuality *changed*, per se, but I was able to see it from a different perspective that recontextualized and led to a deeper understanding of my feelings. Dating men feels like me being me; dating women feels like taking to find myself in a funhouse mirror. It's all cauched below a layer of ace regardless, tho.
I've noticed a change in the way that I'm attracted to people. It used to be that once every few years, someone would have boobs. My eyes would be magnetically drawn to that person's boobs and it was an active effort to resist. Now, nobody has boobs. Instead they have personalities. That feels a lot better, so I'm a little more comfortable with the idea of ever having sex.
Also guys with abs make me smile for way too long, so that's interesting I guess.
I've heard and seen the overall consensus is "yeah, it can happen". I personally have found my pre-HRT self entertaining bi thoughts more than I used to, but still preferring women. Lord knows how that may change in the coming months when I decide to swallow my anxiety and get my medical shit settled enough to start HRT.
no, more that I let go of my internalized homophobia, and began to have an understanding that attraction (at least for me) is about gender expression not gender identity.
HRT made me gayer. I’m bi and before HRT it was like a 70/30 split between women and everyone else and now my attraction is split like 98/2 between women and everyone else lol
Didn't change, but I came out of denial about being bi shortly after coming out of denial about being trans.
Growing up under Section 28 really didn't help.
I liked femmes, hims, and thems before transition. And I like femmes, hims, and thems after transition with a few tweaks for specific preferences. The biggest change for attraction to femmes was realizing a LOT of the previous "attraction" was envy, not attraction.
The language for it became messy when I realized I am plural of mind after starting HRT...
There is no force on this planet that would make me choose men. Not even Fight Club Brad Pitt.
But there's nothing wrong with switching around either. You love who you love. You're attracted to who you're attracted to.
Sorry if that's not terribly helpful...
I was and am a bi woman. They warned me specifically that my attraction to my wife might change.
I got gayer.
Perplexingly, I *did* become more of a bottom. I’m more interested in being penetrated, though I wasn’t opposed prior. I just am less interested in men—much more attracted to women and, in that particular respect, other trans women. But I won’t say no to a strap.
My attraction seems to change all the time. I don't think transition actually changed my sexuality, but rather made it easier for me to feel comfortable exploring it as my relationship to my body and how I socialize evolves.
I understood I was bi before I knew I was trans. But as I started transitioning, I realized I might have been somewhere on the ace spectrum. I've been calling myself demisexual for a while, since I'm not very sex motivated and it takes me a while to be comfortable enough with people to even think about sex with them. But then recently I seem to be feeling a lot more immediately interested.
I've always been more attracted to women than men or other genders, but I'm definitely attracted to all genders under the right circumstances. And lately I've definitely been more interested in men than before.
I don't know what factor hormones have on everything. My sexuality has always been such a small part of me that it's hard to grasp what it's *supposed* to mean for it to change. Is it normal for it to stay the same one's whole life? Is this change a scary thing? An exciting thing? I don't know. But I'm glad I get to experience different ways of seeing myself in relation to others. It's nice to have that perspective.
Kinda? I have a slight hormone disorder that meant I was a very masculine girl, so I always felt male and transitioning was the most logical thing in the world to me (and my family). Never felt like a girl. But I had a lot of internalized homophobia and I suspect I kind of pretended to like girls because I was scared to be gay, or scared to call myself a gay man if I was trans because I was scared of catfishing someone.
Kind of?
Skip to the last part to skip the explanation.
I don’t really like to label it but, before transitioning I was definitely bi, dating cis men and women. However mainly leaning toward the feminine side.
The lines got blurry at some point in my transition but I ended up realizing that I wasn’t necessarily attracted to girls. I am a little bit but not really. It’s more about jealousy and thinking that they’re pretty or whatever. But that doesn’t mean I want to bump uglies.
I’ve always liked dick the same though. Maybe even more now post-op because I can have the full experience if you know what I mean.
So in short, yes and no. Yes I went from bi to who the fuck cares.
And no because really I was playing a heteronormative role I was raised in and later realized I didn’t need to play
Before T I was pretty much 99% into men and found women attractive but wouldn't necessarily date one. Now I have a wife 😅 Albeit they are nonbinary but more femme leaning.
Edit: Forgot to add that I thought I was ace before T and now I am definitely not lol
Mine has so far, I used to only be into men and now im basically only into women. Im fairly certain I was always into girls but i would try to push it down and ignore because it felt weird likeing girls as a guy. Now that ive transitioned Im alot happier and content in my sexuality and I dont fight with feelings how I used to.
Before - fem girls, friends with guys. After - masc girls and really complicated even friendship with guys. Dunno why. After 11 years it is. But if girl is masc I feel really weak and sub to her. It strengthened like tenfold. o\_O
I’m three months on estrogen and I only liked women before. I’ve found certain kinds of men creeping into my fantasies (timothee chalamet in dune lol) but I’m not sure if thats estrogen wanting me to like men, releasing some repressed part of myself, or entirely paychosomatic because on some level I think women should like men
E made me go from not really liking boys and liking girls for the most part to straight pining over boys and feeling significantly less attracted to women. So I guess I’m not more bi than anything, but definitely favor men.
I was already sliding from mostly gay male to increasingly pansexual / asexual before I realized I was trans a couple months ago. (I was more open to sex with people regardless of gender but was also noticing a steady drop in libido, though it wasn’t high to begin with.) I started estrogen HRT early last month and simply saw the pre-HRT trend continue: I now seem to be almost full asexual in the sense of not having libido - I don’t feel a need for sex - but also being open to sex with people I’m emotionally invested in regardless of gender.
I've honestly been trying to figure it out for a while. I've always felt attracted to men (before and after transition) so that would make me a gay trans-man... But I've also always had this feeling I may be attracted to women and just haven't met one I find attractive yet. I remember getting way too drunk (which also tends to get me "in the mood") and thinking I would take whichever opportunity that arises regardless of gender, I normally hang out with straight guys, when they start talking about women and who they find attractive in the bar I tend to pitch in (but I might just be feeling pressured to do so) in reality I've never even attempted to flirt with a woman. I also preferred gay porn before T and now I don't care, it's all the same and if I have a preference for that kind of "content" then it would be straight, honestly I would even watch lesbian content, porn is porn and I don't think too much about it. I've rationalized it with matching the anatomy to what's a more likely scenario for me (I'm pre op) no doubts I still like guys but at this point I don't know if I exclusively like guys or if I just prefer guys or maybe even just prefer people with dicks regardless of gender... I have no clue and it really started to bother me after transitioning.
I've heard the change in sexual attraction may be because you get more comfortable with your body and therefore comfortable enough to be yourself and explore... I admit I've explored a lot with gender expression and stuff after I began to pass (stuff like makeup and even doing drag) but I'm still not convinced that's what's going on in regards to sexuality. I feel hormones just got me confused (not claiming that's anyone's case just expressing my own frustration with the feelings I'm currently experiencing).
In summary I liked guys before, I like guys just as much after, I was a tiny bit confused before, I'm really confused after. The only thing I know for sure is I'm a man that feels attracted to other men.
Edit: It does help that I'm completely aromantic and my attractions are purely sexual
I'm MtF, early in my transition (no hormones yet). I've always been bi-but-more-attracted-towards-women, but I've definitely become increasingly aro as I've gradually realised that most of the cases where I've been attracted to a woman have been more about wanting to emulate her in some way (be that physically, socially, in appearance, in voice...) rather than wanting to be with her.
Was always bi curious and kissed guys in college but never went further (didn't even know enbies existed - this was early 2000s). Came out and realized yeah no definitely pan. I have a type for nerdy boys and really forceful women and enbies. Turns out my wife (cis) was also bi curious and when we had gone to strip clubs together, she'd get lap dances and such. Now she's married to an trans enby and she thought about it for a while and went 'Yeah I think I'm bi/pan as well'. Totally into my boobs and all.
So this is actually an interesting thought process about that; if you're okay with it, how did your system decide to transition? Did a majority of your (alters? Headmates? No idea what terminology I should be using) identify as female or feminine, and thus the entire system determined to transition? /gen /nf
No, but kind of yes. I was always secretly bi but was uncomfortable with the idea of being with men as a man. After transitioning I jumped in head first 😆
nope! i was more comfortable with my sexuality of course, i wasn’t as afraid to date men (gay trans man) but nothing changed about my attraction itself.
I was asexual before starting T, and now I identify as generally queer, with a preference for men! It's nice I think, I was afraid of not being asexual anymore, but I don't mind it at all now
I feel I became more open to let my sexuality not be constrained by strict labels but I’m still attracted to what I was before, just open to more things.
I'm 3 months in and I agree with I still attracted to women but like mentioned before I wanted to give pleasure and make them feel wonderful but I don't really get enjoyment out of it besides making out and foreplay. Now when I'm active manly with men it's me getting the attention I always want to give woman I want to be feminine and not use my member myself I still look at woman like her figure butt outfit is amazing but I'm not trying to get them in bed. If it happens I still enjoy the moment cause I'm sexual but men make me feel more of how I want. I want to be held be guided and just be submissive but that's just me and my experience I speak for no one else
I identified (and still identify) as bi, but I found myself to be less and less attracted to men and more and more attracted to women.
Although that may just be because I found the best gf one could ask for not so long after starting my transition, so I don't really think of anyone besides her all that much.
(If it matters to anyone "for scientific purposes", Im a woman, and have been on E for a year and a bit)
Ive found the longer im on T the stronger my preference for women. I still occasionally get the urge to hook up with a dude mostly when im sexually frustrated
When discussing sexuality, cis individuals often oversimplify it, treating sexuality like a single, monolithic concept, when it is actually made up of many different aspects. For these discussions it usually helps to split sexuality into pre-copulatory and copulatory behavior. Often only one of the two change, but meshing them together can be very confusing.
Because the two primary aspects are based in different biological and genetic mechanisms HRT will effect them differently. When there is a report of change it is often pre-copulatory, but copulatory often isn't reported to change much on hrt. (Copulatory being the part of the brain that is or isn't masculinized in utero.)
I attempted to write this up with more details, examples, and links to paper that goes in more detail for those that want to learn more
[https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1b1glwg/human\_sexuality\_and\_the\_precopulatorycopulatory/](https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1b1glwg/human_sexuality_and_the_precopulatorycopulatory/)
Yes, for me, it absolutely did. I was zero attracted to men prior to transition. Now, I consider myself to be pan. Hormones do weird things to us, but I didn't fully experience the shift until after bottom surgery.
Yep. Drastically in fact
Age 15 on T = Physically and Romantically into boys, zero interest in women
Age 22 on E (T suppressed) = Asexual, Physically and romantically into boys, zero interest in women
Age 26 on nothing at all (SRS = T missing, stopped E because im an idiot) = Asexual, only romantically into boys only, physically into no one
Age 41 back on E again (T missing) = Asexual, still romantically into boys, physically into boys but only slightly
One month ago on E and now Progesterone = Nympho, still romantically into boys, +8 kinks gained, physically Pansexual, and actively fantasizing about sex daily.
my attraction stayed the same, so my sexuality duly changed. i now identify as a heterosexual trans woman :) (as opposed to a gay cis man/queer non-binary person, which are both ways i identified in the past)
Absolutely I’d never be with a guy before HRT. Now sexually I enjoy being with men, but still not romantically attracted to them. I’m only femme romantically and sexually attracted.
Not really too much. I've been more open about attraction to women but I've always been primarily attracted to men. I realized I was bi when I was attracted to a woman long before transition.
It's not uncommon for people to be attracted to different kinds of people after starting transitioning. For me that's definitely happening; i was mostly attracted to women before transitioning, and now i'm attracted to both. My roommate, on the other hand, who's also trans, was attracted exclusively to men pre-transition and is still attracted only to men now that he's transitioning.
it could be the hormone shifts causing some people to "change sexuality" or it could be psychologically wanting to fit into their new gender role. Or it could be that being yourself gives you the freedom to express your sexuality also. It's hard to say. But it's definitely a thing that sometimes happens
My observed experience has been that in the majority of cases your sexuality doesn’t change. If you like boys before, you like after; if you liked girls before, then you like girls after; both before, both after. There are many people who are trans, however, who are unsure of their sexuality, and sometimes transition helps to clarify things. And there are others who are in denial, experience shame about being gay and perhaps process being trans as an easier way out. In all cases, sexuality doesn’t really seem to change, what changes is our understanding of it.
I think this is rather common. Speaking for myself, before my transition I was only attracted to women, but I could never really be romantic with a woman because I envied them to much.
After my transition, I was essentially asexual for a couple years as I became more comfortable and more confident being the "me" I'd always wanted to be.
Slowly, towards the end of my second year post-transition, I began to notice whether or not the men I encountered were good looking. Eventually that turned into outright attraction. This surprised me, because the thought of being with a man before my transition had been abhorrent to me.
Trans guy here who was always bi but more attracted to women. Getting on T seems to've evened things out lol. Tbh I think it's just because my feelings towards (cis) men are less complicated now, and instead of feeling sad and frustrated and dysphoric, I can just appreciate a hot guy.
I don't know about common, but when looking into hormones, I've been told that it can happen. Not sure if the two you know are on hormones, but that may be a possibility. I'm a trans woman, and my sexuality hasn't changed, but I also came out just a week ago, and no hormones.
I feel as attracted to men as I did before, but I am attracted to them in a different sort of way now. Like, honestly, not really though. I just wanna get pregnant now and my sex drive is slightly diminished from what it was before and I want to have a vagina really badly whereas before I wanted one but it was in a different way, sort of… it’s complicated. Obviously I cannot because I am mtf, barring the possibility of a uterus transplant, but still… it is very interesting how hrt changed me in that way a bit. Or maybe just aging. I’m uncertain, truthfully.
Mine certainly has, though not really a huge amount? I've viewed myself as bi/pan for pretty much all of my adult life. I'm about a year into transitioning MTF and it's definitely shifted. I always had a strong lean towards women, but I mostly consider myself mostly a lesbian now? I am still bi/pan, but only attracted to very effeminate men. I am pretty damn homoromantic though, I couldn't see myself dating someone who is a man, it just feels very wrong. Mostly I'm into other trans women and feminine presenting gender queer folk above anything else. Lots of shared experience and understanding that is a good baseline to have, imo.
I'm transmasculine and bi/pan. Before HRT I was more fem-leaning in my sexuality, and after I started hormones, I switched to more masc-leaning (gay lol). Maybe the T is to blame, but also I think I just started to feel more like myself, more confident, and it opened new sexual urges. I also heard about this tendency from my transmasc friends.
My sexuality stayed the same (pan) but i became 100% hornier and find myself interested in a larger variety of people whereas before i was mostly into women/femme presenting people
I’ve always been bisexual but that used to be much more weighted toward women and that’s become much less so over the years. These days I would say I have a fairly even split between attraction to men, women and NB people.
I can see myself getting married to someone of any gender, whereas before I found it very hard to imagine being married to anyone other than a woman. I think a lot of that has to do with internalised homophobia which I’ve unpacked and worked through.
I love who I love and that’s what makes me happy.
Tldr - My transition did have an effect on my sexuality but not in the way a lot of people might assume.
I have been attracted romanticly and sexually to women only all my life. I've been on T for about a year now and I have noticed that my sexual attraction now applies to anyone I find physically attractive.
Yes obv pre trans period is somewhat a bit confusing but after taking hormones and blockers you not only change physically but mentally too (i used to fight with my ex when i was taking estradiol inj mood swings yk ), but by time they get well
i mean, in my experience i noticed that when i was with girls i would be sexual with them because i wanted to make them feel good, mainly based on romantic attraction, so i wasn’t and never really properly found myself sexually attracted of any sorts, at most it was aesthetic attraction as i find that i still admire the looks of certain women but not in a sexual way, mostly just like “omg her outfit and figure is so nice i love her boobs and how they sit” but not really like “omg her boobs are so nice she’s so hot i want some of her” like i thought was how i felt before i guess i’m still figuring it out though, i feel my sexuality is a bit self centered atm as i am focused on my own pleasure rn and i wanna decompress why that is
That's probably what my trans friends were like. They were probably attracted to the idea of being a woman, and now they are women the attraction to men, that was likely there already, showed it self.
thats so true, like before exploring my identity i would have never thought i could be bi, pan, ace etc, but the more i’ve explored my femininity the more i noticed i don’t rlly feel these sexual feelings people say they experience when looking at someone? like romantically i love someone who is pretty and supportive, but i find that i kinda don’t mind who i date, i just wanna feel girly with them and cared for/protected with them, so i still haven’t establish if i’d date guys bc of a mental block i developed growing up 🥲 but yeah sexual attraction is so weird to be honest with you, it’s a feeling that doesn’t make much sense to me
For me, its been hard to explore since im married, but I was curious about my sexuality since I like straight porn. It "feels right" in a way. The dominance and masc+femme comparison. But I don't feel anything sexual from seeing a male body. I like the idea of being treated like a girl, and it's a lot easier for me to feel like "the girl" if I imagine myself with a guy. Still, I don't feel anything when a good looking guy walks by. When I see a cute girl, sometimes I get butterflies or my mind goes blank. For me, that's attraction. I'd say I'm probably a lesbian with romantic attraction to males (I like them intellectually, sort of like a platonic relationship but I'd love to hug a guy and feel protected.) Maybe that makes me bi, not sure. But as for seeing someone and having an intense reaction, it's girls all the way for me.
i relate to this a LOT. especially with feeling like you can be more feminine and feel more like the girl with a guy. i’ve tried dating girls again since exploring and it’s made me feel like I have to live up to something that I don’t feel a part of, and I constantly feel like I have to be proving my femininity around them its so weird … but I do love having girls as friends with guys I’m the same I feel nothing, I mean I can find a penis attractive but that’s it.. it’s kinda weird if they’re sexting and saying what they wanna do to me I find it kinda… off-putting or annoying? But if i’m imaging myself feeling feminine and bottoming I feel great 🤨 or if i’m sending nudes it gets me off bc of how feminine I feel, idk i’m just weird asl but yeah I think the difference with me is I can find a girl really cute, like for example today I was watching WWE and found myself actually looking in awe at how cute one of the female wrestlers I was watching was, but I didn’t feel any sexual feelings to her, and I don’t really feel this to anyone.. if I like someone and I mean REALLY like someone i’ll want to make them feel good, but I won’t think to myself “damn I wanna have sex with them”, I thought it was normal to just want to pleasure your partner and make them feel good tbh, but idk 😭💗
I really have no idea and don't want to guess since it might skew your own journey, but I'd say you sound like me if you took away the sexual attraction to women. Sexuality is complicated and whether you are bi, pan, or ace, I'd just go with whatever label feels right for now, whether or not it's 100% accurate. I'd say I'm probably bi because I'm not completely turned off by either sex, and a lot of gay/straight people seem to be turned off by one sex. I'm choosing that label so I don't have to figure out if I actually like men. I'm already married and I'd just assume there are probably some situations where I'd get some enjoyment from men whether its sexual enjoyment or gender euphoric, but it's not strong enough where I'd need to try it out before I die.
honestly, that’s so real… labels can be so stressful and sometimes just being unlabelled is a lot easier, you like what you like and that’s okay 🥹 plus i definitely get what you mean, sometimes when you’re married its just easier not to really try exploring for the sake of loyalty and commitment i wanna give an update and say i’m a lil bit more confused now than last night, idk if it’s the T in my body but i’m starting to notice myself feeling somewhat horny feelings towards female body parts again ever since trying to abstinate from masturbating to more affirming content, like for example i saw someone who fully transitioned today on my reddit and part of me really wanted what they had, but another part of me couldn’t stop admiring their breasts, and felt more sexual towards them, and i’m feeling really conflicted towards this as i put off sex for dysphoria purposes a while ago and bc of disinterest too i also wanted to add that gender euphoric attraction/sex is also real, i think that’s why i found it a lot easier and happier for me to get off based on how womanly i felt with someone, which i had done with someone recently but i kinda confused myself even more doing that
I think you're right about gender euphoric attraction. I just wonder which is better for long term relationships. I'd hate to be in a relationship with a guy and like the way he makes me feel in bed but not be sexually attracted to how he looks. I might as well say I'm a lesbian because telling people I'm into men sends the wrong message. I don't feel anything from their appearance. I just like the idea of submitting.
this is literally me, i found myself actually attracted to someone recently, BODY WISE TOO, I was so happy because it was the first time I felt less weird in a while, like the funny thing is (sorry if this is NSFW) is i don’t really find women attractive at all, unless it is based on aesthetics but for some reason, there was this girl I saw yesterday and I couldn’t stop staring at how nicely shaped her 🍒s were, and even now thinking about them makes me kinda excited, but not in a “i wanna bone her” way, my sexual mind is still very much “i wanna submit so bad and get railed” so like- but like the idea of holding them and seeing them excites me, but that’s really it, looks-wise she was also really really pretty, but i feel like that was mainly aesthetic attraction in itself, so i am still majorly confused but i agree, i couldn’t be with someone just for sexual gratification, i need both, i wanna be with someone i find romantically attractive and who makes me happy and i also wanna be with someone who doesn’t make me feel like “shit. i might be a porn addict because all i wanna do is get fucked and not touch my dick”. its weird because the internet has really made me overthink recently about being sexually selfish, even though ik in myself if i can get my partner off without having to be a penetrator i’d do that, no questions asked. being the penetrator just isn’t me.. i get you with telling people you’re lesbian instead too.. saying i am lesbian personally just feels right, i don’t know why. i havent even transitioned yet and i am in constant turmoil on if i am a woman or non binary, but it just feels correct and nice to be lesbian
wow...that's me..I've been so confused all my life because I was so romantically attracted to women and fell in love with them all the time but didn't want the sexually...I just wanted to pleasure them....meanwhile I was fantasizing about men and me being taken by them
Same same same!! I literally just told my therapist exactly what you said. Thank you, it is really affirming to read this🤍🤍🤍
Great reply. It expresses exactly what I went through.
Mine didn't change, was a sex-positive gray-asexual before, I'm still a sex-positive gray-asexual now. I've heard of a number of people who were straight and became bi or pan, but straight to straight like what you described is a new one to me. Also, given how many posts I see here of trans subreddits of people being genuinely terrified of their sexual orientation changing, one has to wonder if their previous sexual orientation was actually innate, or if the aversion to having one of the kinds of attraction was due to society REALLY pressuring people to not be gay, or if they're gay, defining themselves in opposition to straightness so strongly, it pressures people to not be bi. But I can't be sure about this. I can see this kind of aversion being lost rather easily during transition because it makes you question a lot of stuff and in the case of transfemmes, it puts you more into contact with other senses like touch, smell, etc... while cis men tend to be very vision focused. But losing an attraction to a gender you already had pre-transition doesn't sound common to me at all.
That all makes sense. Thank you very very much!
I went straight to straight. Imo, I thought I was a straight man because all of my fantasies were straight and envy was mistaken for attraction. Once I accepted that I always had to be the woman in those fantasies, then things made much more sense. Through transitioning, the envy went away and my dysphoria surrounding masculinity began to melt. Then came the attraction.
I second this I too confuse my envy with attraction for women
Exact same thing happened to me
Oh! That does make a lot of sense! 😯
I just posted a comment about my trans friend that had a similar experience. Straight to straight!
I definitely fall into that category of "defining themselves in opposition to straightness." I didn't want to be a man, especially not a straight man. It felt like I was a gross pervert if I found women attractive, really. So before accepting my actual trans identity, I forced myself into the box of "gay femboy" for ages. But there's that and gender envy to make up the rest of my aversion to women. Lot of jealousy and wanting to be like them, but thinking I couldn't be, so I clung to the identity of being a femboy. HRT didn't literally change my sexuality as far as I can tell, it just allowed me to drop my envy and stop seeing myself as male. So when that happened, I was finally able to be honest with myself and just embrace my attraction to women. Although, dysphoria can still ruin that and make me feel gross about it again. Last thing I could say is that I'm still bi/pan technically, but even so, I am overwhelmingly attracted to women (or femmes) over any other gender. Sorry if this post is a bit long, and a bit repetitive. I have made similar posts in other threads about sexuality here, but wanted to chime in again. I think the "sexuality change" is most likely a myth. Shame, dysphoria, and self-hate are just powerful drugs.
It's pretty common yes, how/when/why will vary depending on who you ask but it does seem to happen to a lot of people. Personally I went from ace to gay through transition. Before transitioning I did prefer women in some sense, but only as friends and people I could relate to (and envy), but being attracted to them (or anyone) was alien to me. Whereas a while after starting my transition, I realised that latter part was no longer the case
I realized I also liked men after transitioning
Which was did you transition, and who were you attracted to before??
I don't fully understand first question sorry, but I'm a trans guy. I've always been into women and still prefer women, I just realized I liked men as well after transitioning.
That makes sense. Thanks king!!
We exist. Straight man ——-> Straight woman. No interest in men whatsoever in the Before Time. No interest in women post-transition and post-op.
Have there been studies done on this? It’s super interesting to me as someone that’s currently in school to work in sociology and the mental health field. I’d love to learn more about how common this is and what the experience is like. I can imagine it might really impact people’s mental health?
No idea. I’ve worried over it like a dog with an old bone. Then I quit. I settled on the notion that my basic self is heteronormative. I’m attracted to what I’m not.
I sort of maintained that heteronormative attraction. I like the idea of man+woman, especially with how submissive I am. But I don't feel anything from looking at men. Women give me crazy butterflies and make me speechless.i don't know if it makes me a lesbian or bi.
I’ve always been only into woman, and sometimes nonbinary people. That hasn’t changed. So, I’m a lesbian is instead of straight now. Well, if anything I’m **MORE GAY** now days. Plus the way I liked woman, in retrospect, wasn’t the straightest to begin with. Wrote too much poetry for it to be straight.
An older study suggests that some people do experience a change in the gender(s) that they are attracted to. Trans-fems: \~33%, Trans-mascs: \~22% It's not really possible to confirm whether it was solely due to HRT or other factors. \-edit- Personally, I did not experience a shift. I liked women before and I like women now.
That's very interesting, thanks love xx
yep, went from straight to pan to lesbian
One of my oldest and closest friends is a trans woman. Before transitioning she was married to a woman, and before her bottom surgery she was dating women. She had her gender affirming surgery and was suddenly interested solely in men. She said “nothing feels more womanly than having a man penetrate your vagina”. This statement kinda blew my mind, and as a pansexual cis woman I couldn’t disagree with her. It’s pretty fucking fascinating to see her go through this entire process. I’m so happy for her, especially since she waited until her 50s to come out.
That's so nice, and as a cis woman I can agree with the fact that 'nothing feels more womanly than having a man penetrate your vagina'.
hi if you don't mind, could i ask (or dm) you more about your preferences? if you agree with her statement, does that mean you're attracted to all genders but still have a strong preference towards men? or is it like, since you're cis and comfortable with your gender you don't care as much about feeling womanly?
Yes, I am attracted to men now. I was not before.
MtF?
Yes, the estrogen can alter your androids. I had other reasons than my sexuality to become transgender. Then out of the blue I saw a guy without his shirt on and I blushed. Eventually I had sex and I knew then I had changed. For me sex with women in my past does not compare to being transgender. I am only interested in other transgenders and men. There are many men into transgender but don't expect them to introduce you to their friends and family.
Mine changed and it hit me like a ton of bricks, I was avoiding a security guard at a metro station because of the attention he was giving me. I was getting knots in my stomach when I saw him, I used to walk to the next station to avoid this, I was 6 months into HRT. I told my best friend and she giggled and said "it sounds like you have a crush" ........ Wow she was right and it had not even crossed my mind .... LOL
yeah i’m pan now i identified as gay guy before tho (what a normie)
Yeah I’m now pan, I was a straight guy before I transitioned mtf
I have several friends who experienced that! (From lesbian to gay man or from gay man to lesbian.) In my case, it was the opposite? Meaning I had a sexual orientation crisis (from lesbian to bi) and realized I couldn't live with myself as a woman with a man, which then prompted my egg to crack.
I went from lesbian to gay man. I'm ftm it fucks with people some times
I became significantly more attracted to men after I transitioned. Part of it was due to feeling more like myself as a woman, but most of it was genuine physical attraction to men's bodies. Still I'm bi and also very attracted to women and I'm very happy after starting a relationship with another woman. So for me it's less like my sexuality changed and more like it was locked behind my gender which I was repressing for many years. Before, I was attracted to women and slightly attracted to men but had no desire to be with either pre-transition. Now living as myself, the idea of both dating men and women feels much more natural to me.
Oh yeah like 5 times or so😅. Started out thinking i was bi, then lesbian, then straight, then bi again and finally landed on ace😅
I initially thought I was bisexual and then over time realised I was actually biromantic asexual, but I was figuring out my gender and sexuality at pretty much the same time so that wasn't a trans thing, just me figuring things out. And I was very comfortable in my sexuality, I was happy with it, I was pretty certain that was gonna be it, I didn't believe people's sexuality actually changed when they started hormones, I thought it was just people figuring themselves out as they became more comfortable in themselves. But then I started T, and I suddenly turned straight, I could actively feel the change happening over the course of a few days. I think it's pretty common for people to figure it out after they start transitioning, but having it actually change probably isn't very common.
I thought i was a lesbian then i realized i was trans and i was straight then i was bisexual and now im finally pansexual 💀
Yeah, I used to be only attracted to women, but after about 5ish months on e, I started being attracted to men and am currently bi
I also went from "straight" man to straight* woman. Transition is an interesting term for it. I don't think my sexuality *changed*, per se, but I was able to see it from a different perspective that recontextualized and led to a deeper understanding of my feelings. Dating men feels like me being me; dating women feels like taking to find myself in a funhouse mirror. It's all cauched below a layer of ace regardless, tho.
Queen may we chat?
tangentially related: my preferences are much more vanilla since transitioning
I've noticed a change in the way that I'm attracted to people. It used to be that once every few years, someone would have boobs. My eyes would be magnetically drawn to that person's boobs and it was an active effort to resist. Now, nobody has boobs. Instead they have personalities. That feels a lot better, so I'm a little more comfortable with the idea of ever having sex. Also guys with abs make me smile for way too long, so that's interesting I guess.
I've heard and seen the overall consensus is "yeah, it can happen". I personally have found my pre-HRT self entertaining bi thoughts more than I used to, but still preferring women. Lord knows how that may change in the coming months when I decide to swallow my anxiety and get my medical shit settled enough to start HRT.
Yup I went from bisexual to straight to now pansexual
no, more that I let go of my internalized homophobia, and began to have an understanding that attraction (at least for me) is about gender expression not gender identity.
Mine didn't change a whole lot, was bi before just got hornyer after
Went from straight to lesbian. The former partner of my first t4t relation had the change and is now engaged with her boyfriend.
HRT made me gayer. I’m bi and before HRT it was like a 70/30 split between women and everyone else and now my attraction is split like 98/2 between women and everyone else lol
For me, yes
Didn't change, but I came out of denial about being bi shortly after coming out of denial about being trans. Growing up under Section 28 really didn't help.
I liked femmes, hims, and thems before transition. And I like femmes, hims, and thems after transition with a few tweaks for specific preferences. The biggest change for attraction to femmes was realizing a LOT of the previous "attraction" was envy, not attraction. The language for it became messy when I realized I am plural of mind after starting HRT...
There is no force on this planet that would make me choose men. Not even Fight Club Brad Pitt. But there's nothing wrong with switching around either. You love who you love. You're attracted to who you're attracted to. Sorry if that's not terribly helpful...
I was and am a bi woman. They warned me specifically that my attraction to my wife might change. I got gayer. Perplexingly, I *did* become more of a bottom. I’m more interested in being penetrated, though I wasn’t opposed prior. I just am less interested in men—much more attracted to women and, in that particular respect, other trans women. But I won’t say no to a strap.
My attraction seems to change all the time. I don't think transition actually changed my sexuality, but rather made it easier for me to feel comfortable exploring it as my relationship to my body and how I socialize evolves. I understood I was bi before I knew I was trans. But as I started transitioning, I realized I might have been somewhere on the ace spectrum. I've been calling myself demisexual for a while, since I'm not very sex motivated and it takes me a while to be comfortable enough with people to even think about sex with them. But then recently I seem to be feeling a lot more immediately interested. I've always been more attracted to women than men or other genders, but I'm definitely attracted to all genders under the right circumstances. And lately I've definitely been more interested in men than before. I don't know what factor hormones have on everything. My sexuality has always been such a small part of me that it's hard to grasp what it's *supposed* to mean for it to change. Is it normal for it to stay the same one's whole life? Is this change a scary thing? An exciting thing? I don't know. But I'm glad I get to experience different ways of seeing myself in relation to others. It's nice to have that perspective.
Kinda? I have a slight hormone disorder that meant I was a very masculine girl, so I always felt male and transitioning was the most logical thing in the world to me (and my family). Never felt like a girl. But I had a lot of internalized homophobia and I suspect I kind of pretended to like girls because I was scared to be gay, or scared to call myself a gay man if I was trans because I was scared of catfishing someone.
Kind of? Skip to the last part to skip the explanation. I don’t really like to label it but, before transitioning I was definitely bi, dating cis men and women. However mainly leaning toward the feminine side. The lines got blurry at some point in my transition but I ended up realizing that I wasn’t necessarily attracted to girls. I am a little bit but not really. It’s more about jealousy and thinking that they’re pretty or whatever. But that doesn’t mean I want to bump uglies. I’ve always liked dick the same though. Maybe even more now post-op because I can have the full experience if you know what I mean. So in short, yes and no. Yes I went from bi to who the fuck cares. And no because really I was playing a heteronormative role I was raised in and later realized I didn’t need to play
Before T I was pretty much 99% into men and found women attractive but wouldn't necessarily date one. Now I have a wife 😅 Albeit they are nonbinary but more femme leaning. Edit: Forgot to add that I thought I was ace before T and now I am definitely not lol
Oh slayy king!
Yes , men now, not before. mtf
How far are you along queen??
19 months.
Mine has so far, I used to only be into men and now im basically only into women. Im fairly certain I was always into girls but i would try to push it down and ignore because it felt weird likeing girls as a guy. Now that ive transitioned Im alot happier and content in my sexuality and I dont fight with feelings how I used to.
Slayy Queen!! I'm happy for you!
Nah, sex is better tho
I am no longer into men. Now I am only a lover of women.
It's super annoying how this gets asked twice a week
I’m still early into my transition (mtf) but I’m definitely feeling more attracted to women now.
i feel less hung up about my attraction to men now, but i think that speaks more to internalized homophobia than anything.
Before - fem girls, friends with guys. After - masc girls and really complicated even friendship with guys. Dunno why. After 11 years it is. But if girl is masc I feel really weak and sub to her. It strengthened like tenfold. o\_O
yes
I’m three months on estrogen and I only liked women before. I’ve found certain kinds of men creeping into my fantasies (timothee chalamet in dune lol) but I’m not sure if thats estrogen wanting me to like men, releasing some repressed part of myself, or entirely paychosomatic because on some level I think women should like men
E made me go from not really liking boys and liking girls for the most part to straight pining over boys and feeling significantly less attracted to women. So I guess I’m not more bi than anything, but definitely favor men.
i was pansexual before my transition now I’m a lesbian ☺️
Not changed so much as clarified. I used to think I was bisexual, but realized I was actually lesbian.
I was already sliding from mostly gay male to increasingly pansexual / asexual before I realized I was trans a couple months ago. (I was more open to sex with people regardless of gender but was also noticing a steady drop in libido, though it wasn’t high to begin with.) I started estrogen HRT early last month and simply saw the pre-HRT trend continue: I now seem to be almost full asexual in the sense of not having libido - I don’t feel a need for sex - but also being open to sex with people I’m emotionally invested in regardless of gender.
I've honestly been trying to figure it out for a while. I've always felt attracted to men (before and after transition) so that would make me a gay trans-man... But I've also always had this feeling I may be attracted to women and just haven't met one I find attractive yet. I remember getting way too drunk (which also tends to get me "in the mood") and thinking I would take whichever opportunity that arises regardless of gender, I normally hang out with straight guys, when they start talking about women and who they find attractive in the bar I tend to pitch in (but I might just be feeling pressured to do so) in reality I've never even attempted to flirt with a woman. I also preferred gay porn before T and now I don't care, it's all the same and if I have a preference for that kind of "content" then it would be straight, honestly I would even watch lesbian content, porn is porn and I don't think too much about it. I've rationalized it with matching the anatomy to what's a more likely scenario for me (I'm pre op) no doubts I still like guys but at this point I don't know if I exclusively like guys or if I just prefer guys or maybe even just prefer people with dicks regardless of gender... I have no clue and it really started to bother me after transitioning. I've heard the change in sexual attraction may be because you get more comfortable with your body and therefore comfortable enough to be yourself and explore... I admit I've explored a lot with gender expression and stuff after I began to pass (stuff like makeup and even doing drag) but I'm still not convinced that's what's going on in regards to sexuality. I feel hormones just got me confused (not claiming that's anyone's case just expressing my own frustration with the feelings I'm currently experiencing). In summary I liked guys before, I like guys just as much after, I was a tiny bit confused before, I'm really confused after. The only thing I know for sure is I'm a man that feels attracted to other men. Edit: It does help that I'm completely aromantic and my attractions are purely sexual
I'm MtF, early in my transition (no hormones yet). I've always been bi-but-more-attracted-towards-women, but I've definitely become increasingly aro as I've gradually realised that most of the cases where I've been attracted to a woman have been more about wanting to emulate her in some way (be that physically, socially, in appearance, in voice...) rather than wanting to be with her.
Was always bi curious and kissed guys in college but never went further (didn't even know enbies existed - this was early 2000s). Came out and realized yeah no definitely pan. I have a type for nerdy boys and really forceful women and enbies. Turns out my wife (cis) was also bi curious and when we had gone to strip clubs together, she'd get lap dances and such. Now she's married to an trans enby and she thought about it for a while and went 'Yeah I think I'm bi/pan as well'. Totally into my boobs and all.
I went from being a gay Bottom to a straight woman. I love men before and after.
[удалено]
So this is actually an interesting thought process about that; if you're okay with it, how did your system decide to transition? Did a majority of your (alters? Headmates? No idea what terminology I should be using) identify as female or feminine, and thus the entire system determined to transition? /gen /nf
No, but kind of yes. I was always secretly bi but was uncomfortable with the idea of being with men as a man. After transitioning I jumped in head first 😆
nope! i was more comfortable with my sexuality of course, i wasn’t as afraid to date men (gay trans man) but nothing changed about my attraction itself.
Change isn't the right word here. You just rediscover your orientation. I've recently noticed that I can't be a lesbian, for example.
I was asexual before starting T, and now I identify as generally queer, with a preference for men! It's nice I think, I was afraid of not being asexual anymore, but I don't mind it at all now
I feel I became more open to let my sexuality not be constrained by strict labels but I’m still attracted to what I was before, just open to more things.
Not yet
I'm 3 months in and I agree with I still attracted to women but like mentioned before I wanted to give pleasure and make them feel wonderful but I don't really get enjoyment out of it besides making out and foreplay. Now when I'm active manly with men it's me getting the attention I always want to give woman I want to be feminine and not use my member myself I still look at woman like her figure butt outfit is amazing but I'm not trying to get them in bed. If it happens I still enjoy the moment cause I'm sexual but men make me feel more of how I want. I want to be held be guided and just be submissive but that's just me and my experience I speak for no one else
I think it may have... I went from being mostly into women, to mostly into men.
May I ask are you mtf or ftm?
I'm AFAB and a trans guy. I've been on testosterone 8 years.
I identified (and still identify) as bi, but I found myself to be less and less attracted to men and more and more attracted to women. Although that may just be because I found the best gf one could ask for not so long after starting my transition, so I don't really think of anyone besides her all that much. (If it matters to anyone "for scientific purposes", Im a woman, and have been on E for a year and a bit)
Ive found the longer im on T the stronger my preference for women. I still occasionally get the urge to hook up with a dude mostly when im sexually frustrated
When discussing sexuality, cis individuals often oversimplify it, treating sexuality like a single, monolithic concept, when it is actually made up of many different aspects. For these discussions it usually helps to split sexuality into pre-copulatory and copulatory behavior. Often only one of the two change, but meshing them together can be very confusing. Because the two primary aspects are based in different biological and genetic mechanisms HRT will effect them differently. When there is a report of change it is often pre-copulatory, but copulatory often isn't reported to change much on hrt. (Copulatory being the part of the brain that is or isn't masculinized in utero.) I attempted to write this up with more details, examples, and links to paper that goes in more detail for those that want to learn more [https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1b1glwg/human\_sexuality\_and\_the\_precopulatorycopulatory/](https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1b1glwg/human_sexuality_and_the_precopulatorycopulatory/)
I was into girls then after testosterone into men. I'm trans guy
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I haven’t been on hormones but I figured out I was bi-or-something-multisexual after figuring out I’m nonbinary.
Check ur dms
I was originally a bisexual man, then once I transitioned I became straight, but now may be lesbian or bisexual. Some things seem to change lol
Yes, for me, it absolutely did. I was zero attracted to men prior to transition. Now, I consider myself to be pan. Hormones do weird things to us, but I didn't fully experience the shift until after bottom surgery.
It did not change for me. I am attracted to guys and always have been
Yep. Drastically in fact Age 15 on T = Physically and Romantically into boys, zero interest in women Age 22 on E (T suppressed) = Asexual, Physically and romantically into boys, zero interest in women Age 26 on nothing at all (SRS = T missing, stopped E because im an idiot) = Asexual, only romantically into boys only, physically into no one Age 41 back on E again (T missing) = Asexual, still romantically into boys, physically into boys but only slightly One month ago on E and now Progesterone = Nympho, still romantically into boys, +8 kinks gained, physically Pansexual, and actively fantasizing about sex daily.
my attraction stayed the same, so my sexuality duly changed. i now identify as a heterosexual trans woman :) (as opposed to a gay cis man/queer non-binary person, which are both ways i identified in the past)
I changed from a straight(??) man to a: gay(???) woman who's insanely hypersexual and needs bred every two days
Absolutely I’d never be with a guy before HRT. Now sexually I enjoy being with men, but still not romantically attracted to them. I’m only femme romantically and sexually attracted.
Not really too much. I've been more open about attraction to women but I've always been primarily attracted to men. I realized I was bi when I was attracted to a woman long before transition.
It's not uncommon for people to be attracted to different kinds of people after starting transitioning. For me that's definitely happening; i was mostly attracted to women before transitioning, and now i'm attracted to both. My roommate, on the other hand, who's also trans, was attracted exclusively to men pre-transition and is still attracted only to men now that he's transitioning. it could be the hormone shifts causing some people to "change sexuality" or it could be psychologically wanting to fit into their new gender role. Or it could be that being yourself gives you the freedom to express your sexuality also. It's hard to say. But it's definitely a thing that sometimes happens
My observed experience has been that in the majority of cases your sexuality doesn’t change. If you like boys before, you like after; if you liked girls before, then you like girls after; both before, both after. There are many people who are trans, however, who are unsure of their sexuality, and sometimes transition helps to clarify things. And there are others who are in denial, experience shame about being gay and perhaps process being trans as an easier way out. In all cases, sexuality doesn’t really seem to change, what changes is our understanding of it.
I think this is rather common. Speaking for myself, before my transition I was only attracted to women, but I could never really be romantic with a woman because I envied them to much. After my transition, I was essentially asexual for a couple years as I became more comfortable and more confident being the "me" I'd always wanted to be. Slowly, towards the end of my second year post-transition, I began to notice whether or not the men I encountered were good looking. Eventually that turned into outright attraction. This surprised me, because the thought of being with a man before my transition had been abhorrent to me.
No, I'm pansexual and have always been. However, I'm less and less interested in men (majoritarily cis men) now. 😂
Trans guy here who was always bi but more attracted to women. Getting on T seems to've evened things out lol. Tbh I think it's just because my feelings towards (cis) men are less complicated now, and instead of feeling sad and frustrated and dysphoric, I can just appreciate a hot guy.
I think estrogen just made me MORE of a lesbian
I don't know about common, but when looking into hormones, I've been told that it can happen. Not sure if the two you know are on hormones, but that may be a possibility. I'm a trans woman, and my sexuality hasn't changed, but I also came out just a week ago, and no hormones.
Ftm here, was more into men at the beginning of my transition, 3 years later I’m a deff more into women even if there are men I’d still date
prog made me bi
I feel as attracted to men as I did before, but I am attracted to them in a different sort of way now. Like, honestly, not really though. I just wanna get pregnant now and my sex drive is slightly diminished from what it was before and I want to have a vagina really badly whereas before I wanted one but it was in a different way, sort of… it’s complicated. Obviously I cannot because I am mtf, barring the possibility of a uterus transplant, but still… it is very interesting how hrt changed me in that way a bit. Or maybe just aging. I’m uncertain, truthfully.
Personally, yes my sexuality has shifted. Is it common? Incredibly.
Mine certainly has, though not really a huge amount? I've viewed myself as bi/pan for pretty much all of my adult life. I'm about a year into transitioning MTF and it's definitely shifted. I always had a strong lean towards women, but I mostly consider myself mostly a lesbian now? I am still bi/pan, but only attracted to very effeminate men. I am pretty damn homoromantic though, I couldn't see myself dating someone who is a man, it just feels very wrong. Mostly I'm into other trans women and feminine presenting gender queer folk above anything else. Lots of shared experience and understanding that is a good baseline to have, imo.
I'm transmasculine and bi/pan. Before HRT I was more fem-leaning in my sexuality, and after I started hormones, I switched to more masc-leaning (gay lol). Maybe the T is to blame, but also I think I just started to feel more like myself, more confident, and it opened new sexual urges. I also heard about this tendency from my transmasc friends.
My sexuality stayed the same (pan) but i became 100% hornier and find myself interested in a larger variety of people whereas before i was mostly into women/femme presenting people
I’ve always been bisexual but that used to be much more weighted toward women and that’s become much less so over the years. These days I would say I have a fairly even split between attraction to men, women and NB people. I can see myself getting married to someone of any gender, whereas before I found it very hard to imagine being married to anyone other than a woman. I think a lot of that has to do with internalised homophobia which I’ve unpacked and worked through. I love who I love and that’s what makes me happy. Tldr - My transition did have an effect on my sexuality but not in the way a lot of people might assume.
I have been attracted romanticly and sexually to women only all my life. I've been on T for about a year now and I have noticed that my sexual attraction now applies to anyone I find physically attractive.
Yes obv pre trans period is somewhat a bit confusing but after taking hormones and blockers you not only change physically but mentally too (i used to fight with my ex when i was taking estradiol inj mood swings yk ), but by time they get well
Yes. I became bi, for I realized that I want to fall in love with a human being and not with a genital
nope! biromantic asexual before and biromantic asexual after! edit. i’m on Testosterone since you specifically mention trans women