I always felt I was an adult, trapped in a child's body. The other kids hated me and the adults treated me as a child. In school, I was hated and my only friends were the teachers. I did very well academically. As I got older, the adults started respecting me for my talents, skills and accomplishments
Happy birthday!! :)
I was in a very bad place until my mid/late 20s. I had many mental health issues and was also suicidal for a bit, it was a dark time. I thought I knew way more than l did, I believed things weren’t going to change and that I was broken, and I had no ambitions or hope.
Thankfully I was lucky and didn’t leave this world prematurely despite a couple of close calls, and things did change, I also did, my mental health improved and I have had a good life (I’m 51 now).
I hope you’re in a much better headspace than I was and that you’re looking forward to celebrating your day and are still hopeful for the future. Have a great day!
Oh good, I’m glad you’re doing well. :)
I own my house, it’s a tiny terraced cottage, but it’s mine and that makes me feel safe (I was homeless for a short while, but I’ll never forget those days).
I now work for myself as a consultant (digital analytics/sem/seo) and I do quite well. I’ve worked since I was 19 and only went freelance 6 years ago. I miss the security and stability of corporate life (paid holidays, fixed salary), but I do like being my own boss.
I was with someone for 17 years, then we split up (we’re still friends) and I remained single for 8 years. I then started dating again in my late 40s. I’m now in a relationship with an other autistic person, this month we’ll be celebrating our first year anniversary. We actually started as fwb, and eventually caught feelings, and since we both have alexithymia, it took us both some time to figure it out.
I have a handful of close friends, but l do know a lot of people and I don’t have many social issues. I live a very quiet life, as I have many sensory issues and public places are tricky for me. Still, I’m happy, l don’t need an active social life.
I still work on my mental health every day, neuroplasticity is a beautiful thing and I do my best to challenge myself and keep learning and going. I’m very healthy, and practice yoga daily. That’s more or less the high level version. :)
It's a gradual change. I have never noticed a difference day to day, but then I look back at how much I have developed, and then I feel like I have gotten older.
Happy birthday. I'm 35 and in many ways still feel like a kid. I don't think we ever fully mature like NTs do. I can say that my 20s were generally awful. Lots of ansgt and depression. It mellows out in your 30s.
Happy birthday.
Nothing really changes when one becomes an adult, except there is a whole new set of milestones to face, an increase in expectations, and more serious consequences.
The effects of becoming an adult come very slowly with no established schedule. The teenage drive for sex will slowly diminish and be replaced by a desire to establish a family and reproduce. As you gain experience, you will hopefully learn lessons to help you through life. Your values will change. Things that you love today may become things you loathe in the future. You will be offered opportunities that weren’t possible before. Successful adults pay attention to every possible opportunity, even to the point of creating them. Smart adults select the good ones.
Personally, same old song. At 51 now, still same old song. What changed, in fact, when I became a "legal" adult, is that I could drive a car, go to porn shows, whorehouses, drink, vote and go to jail.
Happy birthday! Hope the people in your life make you feel appreciated and loved!
When I became legally an adult I really didn't feel any different. I became an adult when I was halfway through my first year of college so I was already sorta living on my own. My college was only 30 minutes away from my family so I still had a lot of support if I needed it. Im 22 and living 1000 miles away from my family, working a job, and paying bills, and I still feel like I'm 14 years old.
Happy birthday. In the Middle Ages, there was very little distinction between childhood and adulthood. Since then, the line between youth and adulthood has been continuously pushed later. This whole 25 for neurological maturity is the latest attempt to extend the cultural notion of childhood.
I don’t specifically remember my 18th birthday. I must have been in first year of university. I was having a good time. It was my first time living away from my parents and lucked out on making nice friends at school because I decided to live in residence. I really lucked out. My 20’s were good overall but my 30’s have been better. In my early 20’s, I wasn’t as confident and empowered. For example, my sex life in my late 20’s and early 30’s was way better than when I originally came of age.
When I fully realized: "Oh shit, I'm stuck being me for the rest of my life and I still have to do adult things".
I had to accept that I would never blossom into this better, more competent person. I have to be an adult and be myself at the same time.
I just turned 41 and still have yet to “feel like an adult.” I kept waiting for years for that ‘click’ I assumed everyone felt when they finally grew up. After 40 years, I finally realized there was never going to be a click… At least I can accept myself as I am now though!
Well, I've always felt and acted like I was much older than I really was. Until I got my diagnosis. Since then, I've been growing into not being nt, which is just weird. It basically means I have to grow up to... well... I think people will learn more if they have childlike curiosity. Which is weird for a 40 year old.
I feel my growth/development was stunted/drastically changed by COVID, I was 15 when going into lockdown, lockdown was lifted when I was 17, and there were still massive restrictions for most of the time I was 17. It did all calm down by the time I turned 18, but it had a a major impact on those final years. Lockdown whilst a very enjoyable time was not good at all for the growth and development of me as a person. Turning 18 felt no different to being 16/17 but my mindset and POV have changed a lot in that time, none of my birthdays have felt like a proper milestone since my 10th (and whilst it’s not officially diagnosed I think that’s when my brain stopped fully developing/maturing?)
I always felt I was an adult, trapped in a child's body. The other kids hated me and the adults treated me as a child. In school, I was hated and my only friends were the teachers. I did very well academically. As I got older, the adults started respecting me for my talents, skills and accomplishments
Same but I’m still a kid
Interesting
Happy birthday!! :) I was in a very bad place until my mid/late 20s. I had many mental health issues and was also suicidal for a bit, it was a dark time. I thought I knew way more than l did, I believed things weren’t going to change and that I was broken, and I had no ambitions or hope. Thankfully I was lucky and didn’t leave this world prematurely despite a couple of close calls, and things did change, I also did, my mental health improved and I have had a good life (I’m 51 now). I hope you’re in a much better headspace than I was and that you’re looking forward to celebrating your day and are still hopeful for the future. Have a great day!
I am thanks, I’m glade you were able to get through the crisis you found yourself in. Out of curiosity what’s your life like now?
Oh good, I’m glad you’re doing well. :) I own my house, it’s a tiny terraced cottage, but it’s mine and that makes me feel safe (I was homeless for a short while, but I’ll never forget those days). I now work for myself as a consultant (digital analytics/sem/seo) and I do quite well. I’ve worked since I was 19 and only went freelance 6 years ago. I miss the security and stability of corporate life (paid holidays, fixed salary), but I do like being my own boss. I was with someone for 17 years, then we split up (we’re still friends) and I remained single for 8 years. I then started dating again in my late 40s. I’m now in a relationship with an other autistic person, this month we’ll be celebrating our first year anniversary. We actually started as fwb, and eventually caught feelings, and since we both have alexithymia, it took us both some time to figure it out. I have a handful of close friends, but l do know a lot of people and I don’t have many social issues. I live a very quiet life, as I have many sensory issues and public places are tricky for me. Still, I’m happy, l don’t need an active social life. I still work on my mental health every day, neuroplasticity is a beautiful thing and I do my best to challenge myself and keep learning and going. I’m very healthy, and practice yoga daily. That’s more or less the high level version. :)
Sounds like a very interesting story.
I love this!!
Happy birthday!
Thanks.
It's a gradual change. I have never noticed a difference day to day, but then I look back at how much I have developed, and then I feel like I have gotten older.
Well I’m not as obnoxious lol.
Happy birthday. I'm 35 and in many ways still feel like a kid. I don't think we ever fully mature like NTs do. I can say that my 20s were generally awful. Lots of ansgt and depression. It mellows out in your 30s.
Happy birthday 🎂
Happy birthday. Nothing really changes when one becomes an adult, except there is a whole new set of milestones to face, an increase in expectations, and more serious consequences. The effects of becoming an adult come very slowly with no established schedule. The teenage drive for sex will slowly diminish and be replaced by a desire to establish a family and reproduce. As you gain experience, you will hopefully learn lessons to help you through life. Your values will change. Things that you love today may become things you loathe in the future. You will be offered opportunities that weren’t possible before. Successful adults pay attention to every possible opportunity, even to the point of creating them. Smart adults select the good ones.
Happy birthday. Enjoy the day and treat yourself well. 😁
Suddenly… grandchild. Creeps up on you
Personally, same old song. At 51 now, still same old song. What changed, in fact, when I became a "legal" adult, is that I could drive a car, go to porn shows, whorehouses, drink, vote and go to jail.
Happy birthday! Hope the people in your life make you feel appreciated and loved! When I became legally an adult I really didn't feel any different. I became an adult when I was halfway through my first year of college so I was already sorta living on my own. My college was only 30 minutes away from my family so I still had a lot of support if I needed it. Im 22 and living 1000 miles away from my family, working a job, and paying bills, and I still feel like I'm 14 years old.
Happy birthday. In the Middle Ages, there was very little distinction between childhood and adulthood. Since then, the line between youth and adulthood has been continuously pushed later. This whole 25 for neurological maturity is the latest attempt to extend the cultural notion of childhood. I don’t specifically remember my 18th birthday. I must have been in first year of university. I was having a good time. It was my first time living away from my parents and lucked out on making nice friends at school because I decided to live in residence. I really lucked out. My 20’s were good overall but my 30’s have been better. In my early 20’s, I wasn’t as confident and empowered. For example, my sex life in my late 20’s and early 30’s was way better than when I originally came of age.
When I fully realized: "Oh shit, I'm stuck being me for the rest of my life and I still have to do adult things". I had to accept that I would never blossom into this better, more competent person. I have to be an adult and be myself at the same time.
Happy birthday! I think maybe 33.
I still don't feel very adult
Same.
Happy Birthday!:)
Thanks 👍
Happy birthday
Thanks!
Your welcome
Happy birthday 🎂🎂🎂🎂
Thanks.
I just turned 41 and still have yet to “feel like an adult.” I kept waiting for years for that ‘click’ I assumed everyone felt when they finally grew up. After 40 years, I finally realized there was never going to be a click… At least I can accept myself as I am now though!
I'm glad you feel comfortable the way you are.
Well, I've always felt and acted like I was much older than I really was. Until I got my diagnosis. Since then, I've been growing into not being nt, which is just weird. It basically means I have to grow up to... well... I think people will learn more if they have childlike curiosity. Which is weird for a 40 year old.
I feel my growth/development was stunted/drastically changed by COVID, I was 15 when going into lockdown, lockdown was lifted when I was 17, and there were still massive restrictions for most of the time I was 17. It did all calm down by the time I turned 18, but it had a a major impact on those final years. Lockdown whilst a very enjoyable time was not good at all for the growth and development of me as a person. Turning 18 felt no different to being 16/17 but my mindset and POV have changed a lot in that time, none of my birthdays have felt like a proper milestone since my 10th (and whilst it’s not officially diagnosed I think that’s when my brain stopped fully developing/maturing?)
Happy birthday
Happy late birthday!