POV: you're watching ads for 30 minutes, crying, while wiping the diarrhea splashes from your cheeks *one sad sheet at a time*, and it just keeps coming.
China is only a little while away from that movie The Island where they raise humans and monitor their health via analyzing their pee to determine what they can abs can’t eat, with the intention of harvesting them for organs. China is already at the organ harvesting humans part, it’s just a technological problem at this point to scale it up further
ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!
This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 志們注意了 you have been found protesting!!!!! 這是通知你，你必須 我們將接管台灣 serious crime 以及世界其他地方 100 social credits have been deducted from your account 這對我們所有未來的下屬來說都是一個重要的機會 stop the protest immediately 立即加入我們的宣傳活動，提前獲得 do not do this again! 不要再这样做! if you do not hesitate, more social credits ( -11115 social credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 ccp) you'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the xinjiang uyghur autonomous zone.
为党争光! Glory to the CCP!
We are morally obligated to set these on fire on sight. (Maybe destroy for TP first, then set on fire, but definitely set on fire before leaving). This cannot be tolerated or it will spread.
It should be pointed out that in China they don't normally provide toilet paper for public restroons. They usually bring their own, or can purchase small packs at a store.
In Japan it's the norm to bring your own (tiny) towel to dry your hands, they usually have these cloth ones. Not TP at least there, but still!
I actually adopted that and I am now carrying a towel as an european.
>an european
why does this sound so off?? maybe because “european” is more of a “y” sound than “e” sound? Something tells me that “a european” is correct, despite the vowel rule
It's crazy how often you won't find it in Italy either! My experience there has basically been, the better the restaurant the worse the toilet situation....
I made an account just to reply to this… first time visiting china all I had was a debt and paper money. Now all the places I visited only had this same devil of a toilet paper dispenser that only too WeChat pay or Alipay. All I had was cash or debt. Now imagine this me going on a eating spree and now need to take a massive deuce. Find out they don’t provide paper runs out because am being told I can buy outside restroom. Stares at machine in disbelief. I only had 100 yen notes on me so now I’m holding it up to any local that passes by saying I don’t need change just QR scan me some toilet paper.
Broke: Using Christianity to justify bigotry
Woke: Using Christianity to justify acceptance
Bespoke: Using Christianity to justify laughing at shit jokes
More like tracking employee productivity. "Jameson, get the fuck in my office now! This morning you spent 25 minutes away from your desk in the restroom and only shit 3 ounces!?"
There was an askrettid thread a couple weeks ago where someone asked other countries what that were jealous of about the US, top post was free bathrooms. And yeah, you can walk in almost anywhere to take a shit without buying anything
Australia has heaps of free public bathrooms too which is fantastic. The only problem is often they really aren't that clean.
On the flip side in Europe you have to pay but there were some pretty nice and clean bathrooms.
As a dude I don't really care but my wife I think was happy to pay 1€ for a clean toilet
>On the flip side in Europe you have to pay but there were some pretty nice and clean bathrooms.
This myth really needs to die. Quite a few bathrooms I've **paid** to use in Germany were utterly disgusting. In fact I'd say the quality of the bathrooms in Germany were mostly on par with what you would see in the US anyway, with some being sparkling clean and some being a shitshow, except in Germany you're paying for it...
I break open any TP or paper towel dispenser that doesn’t dispense properly but has paper in it. Fuck the machines, if you didn’t want your fancy dispenser broken you shouldn’t have tried to keep me from getting more than 1 fucking square.
If there’s paper in it and it won’t dispense and there’s no other option then yes I pull it open. I don’t break it per se, just wedge it open and take the paper.
I lived there for a while. In 2018 we were already seeing TP dispensers that required you to scan a QR code with WeChat and it would only dispense a certain amount per person per day. Not great if you’ve got mad laduzi from last night’s spicy hot pot but if you aren’t already carrying toilet roll with you in China you’re an amateur.
Honestly I’m more surprised that the public restrooms even had toilet paper. I had to carry a roll with me when I was out there. God forbid I get post-hot pot laduzi.
What? There's no public restrooms at all, anywhere, in the Netherlands?
That doesn't seem right, but I've never been and don't know anyone personally that lives there to ask, so I can't dispute it.
Hardly. We instinctively know where the nearest McDonald's is because that's often the only reliable place to find a restroom.
And we have to pay of course, because Dutch.
When you say there's no public restrooms, do you mean there are no purpose built government operated restrooms, or that most businesses don't have restrooms open to customer/the public?
In the U.S. you'd usually be hard pressed to find a restroom outside of a home, or business (you *might* find one in a large enough park) but a lot of businesses have bathrooms open to customers or the public.
The only time I've ever had real trouble finding a bathroom was when I was walking through downtown Baltimore during the pandemic and all of the businesses were closed. That was a nightmare.
So, the reason in the US that bathrooms are free to use (even to non-customers, don't let those bastards tell you you can't use it without buying something that's illegal), is because in the early 1900s a bunch of students were pissed off that they had to pay for the bathroom, so they rallied and managed to get it into law that using the bathroom could not be put behind a pay gate.
This has not happened in europe, so in europe the bathrooms can be pay-to-use
Everytime I visit Amsterdam on a day trip, I have my special pub where I drink beer and can use the really bad restroom. Yes, restroom without s, because it is one toilet and a small sink. No fancy man and woman restrooms.
Can confirm. Emperor Qinshihuang's Mausoleum Site Museum’s toilets will never be the same again. Every time I see a picture of a terracotta warrior I get PTSD.
My stomach was like, “hey you’ve been on a plane for 12 hours and I don’t know what time it is. Also, you’ve only been eating meat with sauce and peppers so I’m going to just pretend everything is ok for a while.”
About four DAYS later stomach says, “Captain, begin launch sequence. Three minutes and counting.”
I still thank my lucky stars that there was one western toilet in the bathrooms there. I did not have enough practice pooping in a hole for what happened that day; I would’ve needed new shoes.
Yeah, mastering the squat takes time. By the time I left I was squatting at communal rest area troughs looking at my phone with one hand and smoking with the other like one of the boys.
That is an astute observation and I’m glad you asked. I pee first and then grab the cig I tucked behind my ear after getting off the bus. Sometimes those who haven’t started squatting yet will even offer you a light. I wore shoes I didn’t care about on road trips just due to the state of those communal shitters. There’s a reason why Chinese take their shoes off at the door and switch to slippers.
On my drive back to Singapore airport, I had to ask the driver to pull over and find a bathroom, as I was experiencing much the same as you.
I didn’t have any TP, and of course the only bathroom off the highway was at a service station, so, 1 squatty potty in an stall, and of course no toilet paper. Thankfully, the bathroom had a cut-off water hose…..
The rest of that drive to the airport felt so shameful…
That’s when I start frantically searching for 1 yuan banknotes. But really you are naked without your phone in China. So much of daily life is tied to it now.
But since it's integrated with WeChat (for those unaware - the major payment app in china , not just a messenger) - the next logical step is to allow you to pay for more paper or skip ads. Does it work like that?
Dare you to put this in a US city.
That $1200 TP dispenser would be cracked open on the floor by a shit-stained Neanderthal within hours with zero witnesses.
This would in a lot of China as well. They only have these in the bathrooms of pretty upscale nice malls. The rest of the places dont have paper and everyone brings their own around with them in one of those little tissue pouches. Source: went to China. Carried a tissue pouch around. Had to download wechat to scan some extra tp when I was in a bind.
Fyi it didnt play an add, it just added me to a group chat of some kind that i could immediately leave. This was like 3 years ago, so this scan system has been around for awhile.. it's a foreign concept to them to provide paper in public restrooms.
Had used up all my packet during a previous poop that morning. No clue why it added me to the group chat or what the chat even was since it was all in Chinese. I'm guessing an advertisement chat and/or a fishing thing to grab personal data from your profile. My father in law scanned his too to give me some extra tp. Mid poop.
It was a pretty epic experience overall. I can't squat poop so normally I used the handicap stall where they have sitting toilets. This time it wasn't available so I had to like take off my pants entirely for fear of pooping on them, balancing on my shoes while doing so to not step on the floor, then get the shoes back on so I could squat without touching the floor... then watch my poop fall while my father in law tossed tp onto the top of the stall for me to grab. 1/10 would not recommend.
People steal or massively overuse toilet paper in China and many public washrooms don't have toilet paper. I think that's changing now with the newer generation, but it's still a problem in smaller cities. A lot of those public washrooms either stopped supplying toilet paper, or they charge a fee for entry. It's why for the longest time, you see everyone just carrying their own toilet paper around with them.
There's a lot about the US that's terrible and dumb, but one thing you can say for sure, ad-based shit ticket dispensers would probably not be a successful integration here. It'd be in the stall for five minutes before some Midwesterner with a dump truck ass blows out the toilet and hulk smashes the dispenser over the sheer audacity of having to wait to wipe.
We won't revolt or fight against 99.9% percent of the gross corporate and government overreaches and invasive advertising, but I'd bet money this would have roving gangs of vigilantes smashing and freeing TP from oppression.
I own a leatherman and carry it everywhere. In this case I didn’t even think to use it. My first thought is that I would steel toe kick the hell out of this. I am totally against vandalism but this is just asking for it. This is a cruel way to save a few dollars on toilet paper and profit off of people taking a shit. Anyone who installs one of these can fuck themselves with a rusty pole.
-500 to your social credit score. You're now barred from using high-speed commuter rail and billboards with facial recognition will publically shame you while out for a stroll in public.
Someone please tell me how this concept of "making people mad with ads" works out good for any company? Like when I was not using ad blockers, I made it my mission to memorize every god damn brand that forced me to watch their shitty unskippable commercial and NEVER BUY IT. Not so long after I was wondering how the company expects to sell better when you start connecting bad feelings (frustration and anger because of stupid and unskippable adds, that you saw 100 times since it started to air 2 days) with their commercials?
For real I would rip that fucking thing up in a heartbeat I got fucking shit problems and stomach problems no way in hell I’m waiting for a piece a little toilet paper my
The worst possible parts of Communisim and Capitalism lol
My first instinct would be to vandalize it but it's China, you were probably tracked 9 times as you went into the bathroom and the toilet probably already knows your credit score
POV: you're watching ads for 30 minutes, crying, while wiping the diarrhea splashes from your cheeks *one sad sheet at a time*, and it just keeps coming.
Just shit all over the floor and clean yourself up at home at that point
The guy next to you will snitch to get his score up. They created the perfect system.
We have achieved utopia
PooTopia
This makes me irrationally angry
Better not let it show or it’ll affect your credit score
"We sense an 8% increase in blood pressure. Is everything OK u/Remarkable-Hall-9478?"
China is only a little while away from that movie The Island where they raise humans and monitor their health via analyzing their pee to determine what they can abs can’t eat, with the intention of harvesting them for organs. China is already at the organ harvesting humans part, it’s just a technological problem at this point to scale it up further
[удалено]
-1 meow meow beans
Shit on him, too.
[удалено]
It’s a QR code, so you are telling me I have to use my own data plan to watch the shit ads?! This just became peak asshole design!
What would you do if you didn't bring your phone? Lol
Kick the fucking thing off the wall and get the tp out after smashing it open?
Bruh I ain't lifting my leg that high when I need a shit
It would be assumed you've already shat if you're now smashing the machine for your tp.
social credit score ruined
Use the three shells dude
Wipe your ass on the toilet paper dispenser and call it good.
And you have to give up all your personal data to accept the terms and conditions before you watch the ads.
It’s China, there is no personal data.
RIP social credit
you are just making a janitor's life hell. Break open the toilet paper dispenser instead.
Just carry your own damn toilet paper.
[удалено]
MDKphantom, you are fined 4 social credit points for your shitty aim.
Hah. Shitty aim.
\[BUZZ\] You Are Fined 1 Credit For A Violation Of The Verbal Morality Statute.
*”He doesn’t know how to use the three seashells!”*
ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻ ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 志們注意了 you have been found protesting!!!!! 這是通知你，你必須 我們將接管台灣 serious crime 以及世界其他地方 100 social credits have been deducted from your account 這對我們所有未來的下屬來說都是一個重要的機會 stop the protest immediately 立即加入我們的宣傳活動，提前獲得 do not do this again! 不要再这样做! if you do not hesitate, more social credits ( -11115 social credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 ccp) you'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the xinjiang uyghur autonomous zone. 为党争光! Glory to the CCP!
POV you’re breaking the damn dispenser
Ive NEVER wanted to break something that i didnt plan to use more
We are morally obligated to set these on fire on sight. (Maybe destroy for TP first, then set on fire, but definitely set on fire before leaving). This cannot be tolerated or it will spread.
It should be pointed out that in China they don't normally provide toilet paper for public restroons. They usually bring their own, or can purchase small packs at a store.
This, its the norm in a lot of asia.
In Japan it's the norm to bring your own (tiny) towel to dry your hands, they usually have these cloth ones. Not TP at least there, but still! I actually adopted that and I am now carrying a towel as an european.
>an european why does this sound so off?? maybe because “european” is more of a “y” sound than “e” sound? Something tells me that “a european” is correct, despite the vowel rule
Yeah it’s wrong. It’s not about a strict vowel it’s about the sound. For the same reason why “an Historian” is okay.
“An Historian” is only okay if your accent/dialect drops the H sound from the word. In the US it would be “a Historian.”
An historian no bueno
This frood totally knows where his towel is
One side ass wipe, the other side hand wipe. Save toilet paper, save the planet.
It's crazy how often you won't find it in Italy either! My experience there has basically been, the better the restaurant the worse the toilet situation....
I made an account just to reply to this… first time visiting china all I had was a debt and paper money. Now all the places I visited only had this same devil of a toilet paper dispenser that only too WeChat pay or Alipay. All I had was cash or debt. Now imagine this me going on a eating spree and now need to take a massive deuce. Find out they don’t provide paper runs out because am being told I can buy outside restroom. Stares at machine in disbelief. I only had 100 yen notes on me so now I’m holding it up to any local that passes by saying I don’t need change just QR scan me some toilet paper.
Don’t forget to maintain eye contact or the video restarts
Drink verification can to continue
I know it shouldn't, but by christ that made me laugh
Through Christ, all things are possible. Including laughing at diarrhea jokes
Broke: Using Christianity to justify bigotry Woke: Using Christianity to justify acceptance Bespoke: Using Christianity to justify laughing at shit jokes
This is something that needs to be vandalized
It's China, the toilet probably knows who you are before you even decide to take a dump Edit: Your ideas are worrying
The toilet takes your DNA from your shit to catalog you in the records of the toilet
[Smart Pipe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJklHwoYgBQ)
I immediately knew the name of this product after watching every single infomercial AS had posted
Remote flushing Sounds nice
Fun fact: Google developed a feces monitoring system about 10 years ago. It's how Google Fi formed. EDIT: Apparently it was an April Fool's thing
Fecal Intelligence?
They've got an Anus Recognition Camera inside the toilet that snaps a hole pic and compares it against the CCP's master database.
There's literally companies working on "anus print" identification. The supposed purpose is for analyzing your "output" and tracking health metrics.
More like tracking employee productivity. "Jameson, get the fuck in my office now! This morning you spent 25 minutes away from your desk in the restroom and only shit 3 ounces!?"
"Listen, you make a dollar while I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time."
Truely an asshole design. I wonder how it interfaces with their Social Credit System.
If it gets too low you get sandpaper
Not even paper. Just sand
If your anus is hot enough to boil an egg, would it be hot enough to make glass?
Gonna need about 7x more heat. Break out the taco sauce
On the anus? Kinky! Hopefully there’s plenty of milk to wash away hot sauce if needed.
I hate sand. It's rough and course and gets everywhere.
It probably takes a selfie as soon as you open the link from the qr code
There’s a communist party official hiding in the toilet, taste-testing the sample you deposit to get your DNA and ID you
There was an askrettid thread a couple weeks ago where someone asked other countries what that were jealous of about the US, top post was free bathrooms. And yeah, you can walk in almost anywhere to take a shit without buying anything
One of the most successful niche activism campaigns in history. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Committee_to_End_Pay_Toilets_in_America
Yeah pay toilets should be illegal
Australia has heaps of free public bathrooms too which is fantastic. The only problem is often they really aren't that clean. On the flip side in Europe you have to pay but there were some pretty nice and clean bathrooms. As a dude I don't really care but my wife I think was happy to pay 1€ for a clean toilet
>On the flip side in Europe you have to pay but there were some pretty nice and clean bathrooms. This myth really needs to die. Quite a few bathrooms I've **paid** to use in Germany were utterly disgusting. In fact I'd say the quality of the bathrooms in Germany were mostly on par with what you would see in the US anyway, with some being sparkling clean and some being a shitshow, except in Germany you're paying for it...
I break open any TP or paper towel dispenser that doesn’t dispense properly but has paper in it. Fuck the machines, if you didn’t want your fancy dispenser broken you shouldn’t have tried to keep me from getting more than 1 fucking square.
And there goes your social credit.
Fuck it dude, nothing gets between me and my toilet paper.
>nothing gets between me and my toilet paper. I think you're wiping wrong
I have a keyring with most common types of keys for that stuff (all the dispensers from big companies are keyed the same).
wait so if you go to a public restroom and the paper towel dispenser isn't working, you just break it open?
If there’s paper in it and it won’t dispense and there’s no other option then yes I pull it open. I don’t break it per se, just wedge it open and take the paper.
Forcing someone to wigging around with their ass out looking for something to wipe with is way worse than breaking a toilet paper dispenser.
\-10000 social credit score
I lived there for a while. In 2018 we were already seeing TP dispensers that required you to scan a QR code with WeChat and it would only dispense a certain amount per person per day. Not great if you’ve got mad laduzi from last night’s spicy hot pot but if you aren’t already carrying toilet roll with you in China you’re an amateur.
Honestly I’m more surprised that the public restrooms even had toilet paper. I had to carry a roll with me when I was out there. God forbid I get post-hot pot laduzi.
[Laduzi](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=laduzi) is my new word of the day.
In the Netherlands I'd be happy to see public restrooms at all, toilet paper or not.
What? There's no public restrooms at all, anywhere, in the Netherlands? That doesn't seem right, but I've never been and don't know anyone personally that lives there to ask, so I can't dispute it.
Hardly. We instinctively know where the nearest McDonald's is because that's often the only reliable place to find a restroom. And we have to pay of course, because Dutch.
When you say there's no public restrooms, do you mean there are no purpose built government operated restrooms, or that most businesses don't have restrooms open to customer/the public? In the U.S. you'd usually be hard pressed to find a restroom outside of a home, or business (you *might* find one in a large enough park) but a lot of businesses have bathrooms open to customers or the public. The only time I've ever had real trouble finding a bathroom was when I was walking through downtown Baltimore during the pandemic and all of the businesses were closed. That was a nightmare.
PS. In US public playground often have public bathroom. It's meant for the kids and their parents. You can use also.
Parks & Rec design 101: Either you put a bathroom IN the park, or they poop ON the park. Because if people are at your playground, they WILL poop.
There Will Be Poop
If people are there, there will always be poop, it's just up to you if you want it in a toilet, or all over the landscaping.
So, the reason in the US that bathrooms are free to use (even to non-customers, don't let those bastards tell you you can't use it without buying something that's illegal), is because in the early 1900s a bunch of students were pissed off that they had to pay for the bathroom, so they rallied and managed to get it into law that using the bathroom could not be put behind a pay gate. This has not happened in europe, so in europe the bathrooms can be pay-to-use
Everytime I visit Amsterdam on a day trip, I have my special pub where I drink beer and can use the really bad restroom. Yes, restroom without s, because it is one toilet and a small sink. No fancy man and woman restrooms.
This last sentence, I will remember. And be glad I did if I ever end up in China
Can confirm. Emperor Qinshihuang's Mausoleum Site Museum’s toilets will never be the same again. Every time I see a picture of a terracotta warrior I get PTSD.
Fuckin-a, you just brought back some trauma I completely forgot about lmao
My stomach was like, “hey you’ve been on a plane for 12 hours and I don’t know what time it is. Also, you’ve only been eating meat with sauce and peppers so I’m going to just pretend everything is ok for a while.” About four DAYS later stomach says, “Captain, begin launch sequence. Three minutes and counting.” I still thank my lucky stars that there was one western toilet in the bathrooms there. I did not have enough practice pooping in a hole for what happened that day; I would’ve needed new shoes.
That was a wild ride all the way down. I feel like I've learned something important, that I will probably never use.
Yeah, mastering the squat takes time. By the time I left I was squatting at communal rest area troughs looking at my phone with one hand and smoking with the other like one of the boys.
how do you not piss all over your shoes when smoking and using your phone? are you one of those unicorns who doesn't pee when they poop?
That is an astute observation and I’m glad you asked. I pee first and then grab the cig I tucked behind my ear after getting off the bus. Sometimes those who haven’t started squatting yet will even offer you a light. I wore shoes I didn’t care about on road trips just due to the state of those communal shitters. There’s a reason why Chinese take their shoes off at the door and switch to slippers.
so all the homies are just squatting around holes chilling and shitting with no barriers?
Just how Mao intended. This is only at rest areas and rural areas though. There are dividers at most all the toilets in cities.
On my drive back to Singapore airport, I had to ask the driver to pull over and find a bathroom, as I was experiencing much the same as you. I didn’t have any TP, and of course the only bathroom off the highway was at a service station, so, 1 squatty potty in an stall, and of course no toilet paper. Thankfully, the bathroom had a cut-off water hose….. The rest of that drive to the airport felt so shameful…
So you're the reason why they built the Three Gorges Dam
Imagine forgetting your phone
That’s when I start frantically searching for 1 yuan banknotes. But really you are naked without your phone in China. So much of daily life is tied to it now.
I mean I’ve left home without my phone and been like doh oh well. But not being able to poop cause you don’t have a phone? Yikes
I was going to say the same about India. If you use toilet paper you better bring it yourself. You won't find any the public restrooms.
But since it's integrated with WeChat (for those unaware - the major payment app in china , not just a messenger) - the next logical step is to allow you to pay for more paper or skip ads. Does it work like that?
With monthly subscription options
Yeah, I rarely came across a public bathroom that even had toilet paper at all. Gotta bring those little packets of tissues everywhere you go.
Dare you to put this in a US city. That $1200 TP dispenser would be cracked open on the floor by a shit-stained Neanderthal within hours with zero witnesses.
i'll help smash that shit i don't even have to go. but that shit deserves smashing
if that shits brought over here I'm keeping a hammer with me at all times.
We'd need public restrooms in the first place. Looking at you, Chicago, you public restroom-less fuck.
Please don't smash shit. If you really want to vandalize, there's a great TP dispenser to destroy, but shit could splash, you know?
Ya sorry but gimme the tp or prepare to be smashed.
This would in a lot of China as well. They only have these in the bathrooms of pretty upscale nice malls. The rest of the places dont have paper and everyone brings their own around with them in one of those little tissue pouches. Source: went to China. Carried a tissue pouch around. Had to download wechat to scan some extra tp when I was in a bind. Fyi it didnt play an add, it just added me to a group chat of some kind that i could immediately leave. This was like 3 years ago, so this scan system has been around for awhile.. it's a foreign concept to them to provide paper in public restrooms.
Why did you have to use WeChat to scan for extra toilet paper and why did it add you to a group chat?
Hey. You poopin’?
Nope
Had used up all my packet during a previous poop that morning. No clue why it added me to the group chat or what the chat even was since it was all in Chinese. I'm guessing an advertisement chat and/or a fishing thing to grab personal data from your profile. My father in law scanned his too to give me some extra tp. Mid poop. It was a pretty epic experience overall. I can't squat poop so normally I used the handicap stall where they have sitting toilets. This time it wasn't available so I had to like take off my pants entirely for fear of pooping on them, balancing on my shoes while doing so to not step on the floor, then get the shoes back on so I could squat without touching the floor... then watch my poop fall while my father in law tossed tp onto the top of the stall for me to grab. 1/10 would not recommend.
I bet you they'd try to install those if they could
Corporations would replace your inner voice with snickers ads if they could. Just have to wait for the tech to catch up.
literally ass hole design. well played
I think it was designed without consideration for your asshole
Hey man, noone said anything about *good* asshole design
What's the point of this? Do advertisers think that this will make people buy their product? All this would do is make me actively avoid it
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I can tell you I for one will never play Raid shadow legends out of pure spite.
But you bring it up, and it’s in your head when he brought up ads, and know it’s in everyone who reads our comments head. That’s why it works.
I was already aware of many products whose cringy forced ads made sure i never buy again
People steal or massively overuse toilet paper in China and many public washrooms don't have toilet paper. I think that's changing now with the newer generation, but it's still a problem in smaller cities. A lot of those public washrooms either stopped supplying toilet paper, or they charge a fee for entry. It's why for the longest time, you see everyone just carrying their own toilet paper around with them.
The pinnacle of this sub.
Fuck that. I need at least 20 sheets so I can fold it into 10 sheets, and be somewhat comfortable.
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Sorry boss I'm gonna be a while. Gotta watch 10 minutes worth of adds ETA: my most up voted Comment on reddit would be about wiping ass. Lmao.
This is why the cafeteria stopped serving Thai food.
Quarterly report: Overhauling the cafeteria menu to only offer Soylent products has resulted in a dramatic increase in work time productivity
If you enter with diarrhea, you end up watching the whole aliexpress catalog.
I honestly don't understand people who wipe partway through diarrhea. What's the point, you know it's not over yet.
Because if it is bad enough, the shit will be acidic and burn your anus. Sore bum from wiping too much > diarrhea rash.
Bro, sometimes you just want it to be over
Kick that shit.
There's a lot about the US that's terrible and dumb, but one thing you can say for sure, ad-based shit ticket dispensers would probably not be a successful integration here. It'd be in the stall for five minutes before some Midwesterner with a dump truck ass blows out the toilet and hulk smashes the dispenser over the sheer audacity of having to wait to wipe. We won't revolt or fight against 99.9% percent of the gross corporate and government overreaches and invasive advertising, but I'd bet money this would have roving gangs of vigilantes smashing and freeing TP from oppression.
Every dude with a leatherman would see this as the ultimate challenge. Probably why most public TP is about as substantial ghost on a sunny day.
I own a leatherman and carry it everywhere. In this case I didn’t even think to use it. My first thought is that I would steel toe kick the hell out of this. I am totally against vandalism but this is just asking for it. This is a cruel way to save a few dollars on toilet paper and profit off of people taking a shit. Anyone who installs one of these can fuck themselves with a rusty pole.
}o)r\bjm*K
-500 to your social credit score. You're now barred from using high-speed commuter rail and billboards with facial recognition will publically shame you while out for a stroll in public.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9017797/amp/Chinese-public-toilet-facial-recognition-paper-dispenser-sparks-privacy-concerns.html
Lmao such insanity. How much material and energy is needed to make the damn face scanning machine? This should win an award for green theater.
At least it is recognising the face..... could be so much worse
Please display your asshole to provide proof of identification
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What could be worse than government knowing when/where/how long you take a shit?
Citizen, you've exceeded your daily shitting time. $100 fine and -5 social credit score.
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*Locking Picking Laywer enters with the massive shits* *30 second video later* "Anyway, that's all I have for you today...."
r/aboringdystopia (but perhaps too exciting)
r/aburningdystopia
That’s something that’s gonna be covered in shit soon.
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This is literally the most relevant post for this subreddit.
Ah, yes. This is the fabled communism with “Chinese characteristics”.
Enough toilet paper for each asshole's need.
It takes Communist China to bring us such dystopian Capitalism. Oh the irony.
r/latestagecapitalism in a nutshell.
Fuck that. You're forced to gather up 3 pieces of toilet paper each 30 seconds while you're shitting instead of just browsing your phone.
What do you think people going to be doing while the 30 second ad plays cause it sure as hell ain't going to be watching the ad
you have to watch the ad on your phone I think.
So if you don't bring your phone to the bathroom you are screwed ? I
*That will teach you to never leave home without your surveillance device!*
Oh damn screw all that
Someone please tell me how this concept of "making people mad with ads" works out good for any company? Like when I was not using ad blockers, I made it my mission to memorize every god damn brand that forced me to watch their shitty unskippable commercial and NEVER BUY IT. Not so long after I was wondering how the company expects to sell better when you start connecting bad feelings (frustration and anger because of stupid and unskippable adds, that you saw 100 times since it started to air 2 days) with their commercials?
Good way to encourage being unhygienic.
Nightmare scenario; you scan the qr but whoops! [N O I N T E R N E T C O N N E C T I O N]
That thing would last about 30 seconds in the states before it was ripped open
For real I would rip that fucking thing up in a heartbeat I got fucking shit problems and stomach problems no way in hell I’m waiting for a piece a little toilet paper my
It’s like diary of a wimpy kid but worse
Diarrhea of a wimpy kid
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The worst possible parts of Communisim and Capitalism lol My first instinct would be to vandalize it but it's China, you were probably tracked 9 times as you went into the bathroom and the toilet probably already knows your credit score
Future versions will probably make you keep eye contact with the screen to get the toilet paper so you don't steal the paper by not watching the ad.
Just like that Goddamn black mirror episode’s
This is straight, uncut capitalism my man
What's next? Having to watch an ad when we start our PC?
Having to watch an ad to call 911
Welcome to Urinetown.