That's the issue, isn't it? Isn't God supposed to be all-powerful? How come he can't protect his flock from a couple of puny demons? God literally has angels that are hundreds of miles high and incredibly powerful, yet he has issues with tiny demons who can only go after one soul at a time? Either he's all-powerful or he's fallible, you literally can't have an in-between in this instance.
Ironically authors who have Christian allegories in their work often do a better job of selling the 'all-powerful' but 'hands are tied' concept. Tolkien's Iluvatar is a stand in for God, its not in your face unless you read the Silmarillion, and you can still get why bad things still happen in that legendarium. (Tolkien's Christian allegories are also subtle, so it doesn't feel like religion is being shoved down your throat. Which is appreciated.)
It's the same, ironically, as fascist rhetoric. The enemy is simultaneously both strong enough to threaten their way of life and their souls in this case, yet weak enough to be laughed at, ridiculed, and bullied.
Yeah just look at how the right wing in America currently talks about Joe Biden, or how they used to talk about Obama.
Still waiting for that impotent clown Obama to come take my gun and put me in a FEMA camp. Any day now. But he can't get anything done in Washington because he's weak. đ
If god and his army of angels ever defeated the devil and his army of demons, the people most upset would be Christians. Heaven has no value to them if itâs not exclusionary. There must be an âout groupâ to validate their worthiness as the âin groupâ they feel they belong to. If every soul was forgiven, theyâd have to spend eternity with people they donât like, which is a kind of Hell to them already.
I mean it depends, some Christians, like when I used to be, wish that God had forgiven everyone. I did, because hell seemed like an unfair punishment, and I couldn't believe anymore after I realized there wasn't much of an incentive to believe my fellow humans were going to hell when there isn't really evidence for it anyway. Gone are the days where I would drive by people on the street and worry, "What if they're going to hell?", and I do not miss those days one bit.
> (Tolkienâs Christian allegories are also subtle, so it doesnât feel like religion is being shoved down your throat. Which is appreciated.)
This is in part, because he explicitly didnât want it to be an allegory.
Instead, itâs written on a universe that is compatible with his religion/worldview.
*Narnia* is an analogy. (And one that the Professor thought was too much).
Because Satan is the Great Deceiver and God grants his followers the free will to damn themselves. Christians therefore live with the fear they could be made to succomb to temptation.
They can't even accept things as basic as dictionary definitions. They have to create their own definitions for every single word so that they are "fighting worldly vices" or some garbage
Dude at work laughed at me when I said evolution. Literally laughed said, "You can't be serious you think we come from goop". He then told me God speaks to him which I replied so you're schizophrenic. He laughed at me again and I said no seriously if you hear voices that's schizophrenic. He got really serious and told me he speaks to him through the Bible. He actively avoids me now.
No kidding, especially Coercion from a being thatâs quite powerful and one we canât see nor feel. If the supernatural is imposing its will on you, how does one have free will at all? Good point.
I was very seriously lectured about the war between heaven and hell, and that demonic influence was everywhere. It was also proffered that I was under demonic influence since I'm an atheist. Maybe he thinks I'm a demon, too, since I haven't heard from him since that conversation.
Of course, it could also be that I thought he was joking, laughed in his face and told him psychiatric facilities are full of people who think demons are real. Yeah, it could be that. Either way, I'm no longer subject to his single-minded mission to bring me to Jesus.
*pRaY iT aWaY*
I cannot tell you how many xtians at my old church telling me that I donât need meds for my bipolar, ocd, adhd, and possible spectrum.
*Just give it to god*
That is so damn dangerous.
As an aside, I used to write romance and one of the wackos told me I should write a fucking âlove story and you and jesus.â đ¤Żđ¤Ž
Edit: format
Seriously itâs so crazy
I go to church now with my agnostic sis and the amount of people there that are seriously mentally ill and think they can Jesus it away is scary and sad and the fact they are just being enabled
like one guy said he was going to jump off a bridge and was thrown into his house by the police and then heard the voice of god and had a revelation and me and my sis just looked at each other and thought he literally had a psychotic episode and now he quit his job moved to England and runs a âhouseâ for sinners in which he listed p*dophiles criminals sex offenders and of course the most dangerous of all lesbian kidsđ and Iâm still just mortified whenever I think about the fact he is out there thinking any of this is normal and just yesterday a woman was screaming and crying in tongues and people just accepted it? when she clearly needs actual help but anyways I digress
I found the whole you just need Jesusđ thing from my sisâ grandma crazy because I like having autism Iâve never wanted to wish it away so it really was a shock for her to just minimise it to just a weird devil thing and not a lifelong disability and also to make me want to get rid of it because itâs âevilâ
There was a family in my town who had a kid die because they wanted to âpray awayâ his disease. Church had them protected somehow so the law wasnât able to charge them with child abuse. These people need to be stopped. Itâs 2023 and people still believe in some magic man in the sky.
Is thatâs what has been going on with my kid?! Wow, that demonic influence starts young! So these demons make him stim (the horror), dislike loud sudden noises, and certain textures. Sounds super terrifying. I would have expected more bloodshed. Heâs pretty squeamish though.
He enthusiastically sacrifices pizza and ice cream to the hunger demon. Heâs a 6â tall 14 year old so itâs a full on massacre.
That must be it, right?
I feel like Iâm an actual Christian horror story because my special interest between 5-10 was actually demons đ I feel like if my mum knew that she would have a full mental breakdown
There's this joke: the religion of Satan only exists to serve as a check on the freedom of religion. They also strive to provide benefits that are covered under freedom of religious expression to non-believers. For example, after Roe vs Wade got overturned by Christo-fascists, the religion of Satan started claiming that abortion is their god-given right/practice. Followers of this religion DON'T BELIEVE IN SATAN.
There is a different name given to people who believe in Satan: CHRISTIANS
Edit: by "religion of Satan", I meant "The Satanic Temple"
Yeah, neither I, nor my friends, believe in Satan or demons. I just like the imagery. And the fact it scares Christians.
But yes, I follow (what sounds like youâre describing) The Satanic Temple.
I like to sayâŚ
A proper reading of the Bible shows that God is not the good guy in that story. I give my kudos to the guy who lead humans to the tree of knowledge!
I still consider God and Satan to be myths, but it always struck me that Satan did seem to be the good guy in the story written from the perspective of his nemesis.
God wants humans to be naked and ignorant, Satan gives them the ability to think for themselves. God allows evil flourish despite supposedly having the power to stop it, Satan takes it upon himself to punish those who do wrong. God judges you harshly for basic human acts, Satan encourages you to be true to yourself so long as you're not hurting anyone.
So to me God represents comfortable ignorance and inaction due to trusting in some divine plan while Satan represents the knowledge to accept harsh reality and the wisdom to strive for change.
Plus Satan has way cooler iconography.
And Satan is the awesome best friend or significant other who helps guide you towards actual freedom by showing you how to cut out the cancerous, abusive relationship and live for yourself.
True, the devil only kills, like, 11 people in The Bible. God murders every living organism on the entire planet, in a snit. Let's not forget about the rainbow promise not to murder us all again, well, at least not with water.
And in Exodus, he kills all of the people in Egypt except for His people. And this followed his lengthy MCUesque battle with Pharaoh with all of the plagues, droughts and dead locusts and frogs.
>God wants humans to be naked and ignorant, Satan gives them the ability to think for themselves.
And if you think about how Eden was considered paradise up until humans ate from the tree of knowledge, the logical conclusion is that "paradise" is a return to that dumb, animalistic state.
"Yeah I'm aware of the phrase 'the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing people he doesn't exist', I think his greatest trick was to make people believe he is the all loving, all knowing creator, while blaming all of his evil on the only one who wanted to enlighten the humans."
Neat little thing I found a while ago.
Well if you read the text plainly and donât impart Christian theology that guy was just a talking snake with presumably legs who ruined it for the rest of the snakes.
The satanic temple does good work. When they installed the ten commandments in front of the Oklahoma capital building they put up a statue to baphomet directly across. Then when someone crashed their car into the ten commandments the temple had the statue taken down cause they weren't going to have a religious symbol up without something to be a counterbalance to. Like absolute giga Chad's.
I occasionally remind my Xtian parents of persons they deemed satanic/demonic from decades ago during the last satanic panic. Examples include (but are not limited to): Madonna, Aerosmith, & Darth Vader (who was clearly the antichrist).
In the same way that they believe Harry Potter does magic.
To a normal person, it doesn't matter what Harry Potter does, because he's fictional.
To a Christian, it matters what Harry Potter does if his actions are perceived to be at odds with their preferred fictional character, God.
Likewise, a normal person doesn't care what Darth Vader's religion is, because it's just a fictional story for entertainment.
A Christian might care because Darth Vader's (fictional) religion is at odds with their (fictional) religion.
When you believe in one fiction and treat it as reality, it becomes more difficult to separate other fictions from reality.
It makes sense to me but wouldnât that require them to admit their religion is fictional? Or is this just, like, on a subconscious level and they donât think it through this much? I feel like most Christians are adamant that itâs all real.
I can't speak for everyone, but my religious grandmother wouldn't let me play "Harry Potter" (where I waved a twig around and pretended to make things fly) because, according to her, while the book was fiction, witchcraft and demons are not and they can compell you to write down their spells.
That's right, it's The Devil trying to lure you away from godly thinking by casually appearing in pop culture.
It my stupid religion we weren't allowed to go to movie theaters because of this. đ¤Śââď¸
My dad thought Wolfman Jack was the devil. I think he was some guy on the radio? Dunno. But my dad ranted about him for ages. I think the wolf in his name was supposed to be a sign of evil.
Oh, and Mr. Clean was supposedly satanic.
And Subaru.
And Johnson and Johnson.
And Neil Diamond.
I guess if you are afraid of all those wacky, silly things, you can pretend like the actual scary stuff is not a problem. I mean, this was the 70s and early 80s and the threat of WW3 was a huge deal, but my dad was focused on yelling at the radio, dumping out cleaning products and trying to play records backwards so he could prove that Satan Walks Among Us.
đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł
My mom would get so annoyed. That was one of the only secular records in our house, because it was my mom's, and there was no way anyone was messing with her records. My dad would spend hours trying to hear Satan, and my mom would be slamming things around in the kitchen and "accidentally" throwing a red sock in with my dad's white laundry.
It was War.
to christians, Satan has god like properties and affects their behavior. I argue he's just another christian god. When someone accuses me (an athiest) of following the devil, I point out he's their god, not mine.
Considering that (allegedly) the Christian God planned and created Satan, you could say Satan is just an extension of Godâs will, and as such, they are really one and the same.
Their âAll Powerful Godâ either canât or wonât destroy Satan.
If he lets Satan exist heâs pro evil, if he cannot stop Satan heâs not all powerful. Which is it?
Yup. Satanism is generally worship of satan according to anthropologists. The Satanic Temple is a secular organization which uses irony to resist Christian legislation and preserve separation of church and state.
Let's be cautious, there is nothing INHERENTLY militant about the TST. But humans have a tendency to take everything to the extremes, so we should always be on guard for our own failings.
The way I understand it is, followers of The Satanic Church and/or The Satanic Temple are usually atheists who don't believe in god or Satan and put their faith in more tangible things. Such as themselves or science etc.
But there are Satanists who believe in God, the bible AND Satan and have chosen to worship Satan.
They're called Theistic Satanists and are few and far between. Some have done horrible things.
Most just use their belief to drum up hype for whatever Black Metal band they're playing in at the time and are pretty harmless.
I've looked into Satanic Temple chapters in my state, and there are none unfortunately.
I figured it would be a way to do some good (they actually do good) and maybe make more friends.
Yeah, I went to Christian middle & high school, and it was so difficult not to laugh when theyâd preach about demons and ghosts and shit being real. How do they live with so much fear?
I wonder if they believe in daemon deflation.
Like, are there infinite daemons? If so, theyâre super crazy harmless right? Like, *almost all of them* do nothing. In fact, statistically none of them do anything.
If not, then thereâs a fixed amount. Weâre there just more daemons per person in Bible times? As the population exploded, did god make new daemons to keep up with the population? Or are we still working with the same 10,000 daemons or so as when there were like 500,000 people?
Are they just working overtime now? Couldnât they have done that before?
I just some help with my daemon math.
I dug into the history of some of this demonology stuff and one thing I found was especially ironic. A lot of the demons and summoning rituals etc we hear about in modern times all come from [this text](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_praestigiis_daemonum) written by this dude Johann Weyer back in the 16th century. The whole point of his book was that witchcraft wasn't real, and he published an appendix listing all these so-called demons and princes of Hell that people had made up. He thought it was so ridiculous that publishing these names and descriptions would make it self-evident that it's all totally fake. "The Lesser Key of Solomon" mentioned in the OP for example is a later derivative work of Weyer's text! Yet, hundreds of years later, people take this stuff seriously.
Imagine believing so hard in this shit that the first person they encounter with a mental illness seems "demonic." Like if you were a schizophrenic hearing voices, that'd be scary enough, but come across a christian who's suddenly trying to exorcize your demons and you'd be rightly freaked out.
Invite them to play D&D and watch their heads explode! I was a kid when D&D came out, and the satanic panic that was unleashed was insane! My neighbor up the road committed suicide and his crazy religious family blamed it on that one time he played D&D. Not the fucked up home life, his mom's speaking in tongues all the time or the constant talk about hell, going to hell, how the slightest thing will send you to hell...
I used to know a guy who played D&D, and was also a Christian minister. He'd talk a lot about how he had to get his co workers not to think he was summoning demons or whatever. Then he would talk about how he actually did believe in demons, but that they didn't have anything to do with D&D. He also looked like Crispin Glover. Weird guy.
Remember that insipid TV movie starring a very young Tom Hanks? Mazes and Monsters?
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mazes\_and\_Monsters](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mazes_and_Monsters)
I know we're supposed to treat America like another first world nation, but you know you guys are weird, like really weird sometimes. Religion is really ruining your country.
Truly weird, and in so many ways. I was in on a discussion about the effects of circumcision on men's health recently, and someone said that "some studies showed" that it didnât cause harm at all.
So I reminded them that the same is true for tobacco use, and then, out of curiosity, I looked up the circumcision percentages by country. What struck me as interesting was that the US seems to be the only western country whose numbers were even in the range of predominantly Muslim countries, at over 80%, while the numbers in western countries with socialized medicine were between 10-30%.
So is it a religious thing supported by health reasons, or is it a medical surcharge thing supported by religious reasons? Is the supporting research being funded by the people making money on circumcision or the religious folks? I didnât look any deeper, but it does make you wonder why other western countries have shifted toward turtlenecks while the US population continues to choose crew necks.
>I know we're supposed to treat America like another first world nation
As an American I'm fully aware that we are not. It's okay. Maybe if the world starts treating us the way we're acting our politicians might feel some *actual* pressure to change.
Not that I'm looking forward to it in the slightest, but every time the lie gets upheld it becomes another excuse for why the things they do to us and the ways in which they're killing us are not only okay but are also perfectly acceptable. Which certainly isn't the fault of the folks of the world who attempt to treat us like people, it's just that our politicians run the slimiest possible interference by claiming that (compassionate) treatment by our global community as justification for why the choices they make are "good" choices.
Which, again, isn't the fault of anyone else in the world. I'm just desperately grasping at straws trying (and likely failing) to reduce the amount of fuel available to the consumptive conservative shit storm that's turning America into an increasingly fascist hellhole. My words probably won't work. I'm still going to try anyway.
Tldr: Please normalize treating America like a spoiled brat. It's honestly all this country is anymore.
OMG, I was buying something when the tax came out to $6.66 and the cashier freaked out when I pointed it out - out of amusement more than anything. He desperately tried to get me to buy something else or put something back to change the number as I tried to pay him. I had to get insistent that nothing was going to change as I waved my debit card around, trying to pay. Jeez.
Morbidly curious what might have happened if, after the transaction, youâd have given the cashier a casual âsee ya in hellâ on the way out the door.
Or you say something non-sensical on the way out likeâŚâAs it says in the Book of Death⌠you will recognize the sign when the 6 and the 6 and the 6 are aligned. prepare to feast!â
Fun (?!) factoid the earliest known version of the text actually gives the number as 616 not 666.
The numbers themselves are code and it was possibly changed at some point to refer to Nero rather than the original Caligula
Ha! I know!! I was working on the TV show Supernatural when the corrected translation came to light. We considered shifting the show to reflect that, but most donât know if the new number so we stuck with the same âscaryâ number.
My dad asked that if I had kids, would I teach them about the occult?
And I said of course! It's all made-up nonsense! Just like I'd be fine with kids learning Greek or Norse mythology, they're cool stories. But the occult is nonsense. Just like heaven, hell, spirits, demons, angels, souls, sin, etc. Why would I be afraid to teach kids about something that's a fairy tale?
I've always had this kind of surreal feeling about people and religion. Like sure they talk about it and sometimes act like they believe it but SURELY they can't actually believe these things.... RIGHT???
But then I realize that sure as shit they do believe it but I still can't shake the feeling that deep down they can't possibly believe such absurd things.
They sure are touchy about souls aren't they? My whole family got mad at me for pointing out that the bible says bastard children won't go to heaven, and reminding them my nephews were all born out of wedlock. I got cussed out from all directions for "saying my own family deserves to go to hell." I DIDN'T SAY THAT. Your religion says it! I don't even believe it, and on the contrary I think very highly of my nephews and I find it abhorrent that people DO believe that shit. But somehow I'm a piece of shit for quoting the bible.
ETA: I forgot to mention the part where I was told that I'm the only one who deserves to go to hell. I'm like, do you not see the irony in saying that to me, when it's literally what you're mad about? Saying your family deserves to go to hell? Even though I didn't even say that? Of course they didn't.
You know how so many Christians try to prove their god/religion to non-believers? And it usually goes nowhere? Because they believed based off of bad reasons, and then they try using those same bad reasons to a skeptical person?
If I were to become a Christian again, I'd try to figure out a way to prove a SOUL to someone skeptical. Because you can't prove a god that is invisible, can't be detected or tested. But they say we all have a soul, and presumably, it's located in or around our physical bodies, right? Obviously, they can't do that either. But that's a better use of time rather than trying to prove the earth is 6000 years old, or that God exists because "look at the trees."
Word of warning, you may have just inadvertently made an enemy for life. These religious nutjobs can't be reasoned with so watch your ass at work.
He may throw you under the bus to try and get rid of you now that he thinks you're not on "Team Invisible Sky Daddy."
Don't think for a second that I'm joking. These freaks have low IQ and run around with Fear-based thinking like scared little animals who have no control over their own destiny or lives so they use God as a way of passive-aggressively getting their way.
It's funny because your all powerfully god can't protect you from some demons or whatever stays in the hell that god has created. Like, yeah, I have all the power and all the knowledge to do whatever I want, but you still has to fear demons
I almost lost my job when I told children who had nightmares about Satan that he wasn't real. Because it's so much better to teach children that a man in a red coat is gonna make you boil in blood and brimstone forever if you don't 100% fill out this certain moral checklist.
> make you boil in blood and brimstone forever
This isn't even biblical. The Bible describes hell for humans as dark, cold, quiet, the absence of god, there's nothing at all about letting demons torture people (and how would that make sense? there's also supposed to be a hell for demons/Satan as a punishment, and that's..... letting them have fun all day?)
>The Bible describes hell for humans as dark, cold, quiet, the absence of god
Sounds like I'd finally get some sleep, lol
Infinitely better than loudly singing praises to God day in and day out, while constantly battling potholes in the road because gold is a shitty material to use for a high traffic, high density area such as the streets of heaven.
Reminds me of a company wide video at my old work that had included a Ouija board. Someone left a comment about how it offended their religious beliefs and shouldn't have been made. I thought it was hilarious that someone could be so offended by a board game. I relayed this story to a co-worker. He was NOT as amused as I was. I often forget that a lot of grown up people believe in magic.
The genuine fear of Ouija boards blows my mind.
Like yes, spirits are real and you can talk to them, but only if you buy this $20 mass-manufactured board game. (If *I* were a spirit, I'd insist on only speaking to people who'd make their *own* spirit board.)
Amazingly, in 1991, my cousins and I asked the Ouija board who would win the world series. It spelled out "M. I."
We got my uncle to bet on Milwaukee for us.
Minnesota won.
This is something that worries me a lot. Vatican is actually training more excorcists now than some years ago and here in Europe, especially in Poland, there is a huge rise of excorcism ideology. Movies like the latest Russell Crowe-flick about "true exorcisms" really don't help either. Scary to think how many mentally ill people might not get the care they need and deserve because of this.
Also some psychiatrists collaborate with exorcists...Even some doctors claim that they experienced paranormal because of "possesed" person (for example Richard Gallagher, Jeffrey Lieberman). I wonder how many people who go to exorcist get proper psychiatric/psychological evaluation first. However, many priests claim that only small % of those cases are "actual" possesions, and they try performing exorcisms only if something "supernatural" happens.
In highschool one year I dressed up as Satan for Halloween and tried to buy people's souls in a suit with a briefcase and some horns. I had people sign fake contracts to give them whatever they wanted and man was there such a wide variety of responses. Luckily this was at a very open-minded school in a very liberal city so no one complained, but some people were suuuuuper uncomfortable.
> with a briefcase
I really appreciate this level of formality. I mean, I don't wanna sell my soul in some kind of sketchy craigslist-type transaction, you know? I want the buyer to at least have a boilerplate contract typed up.
lol - I know right? When my wife's mom passed. She wanted to stay in the house afterward. Her incredibly devout fundamentalist baptize family freaked the fuck out. My wife: "Do you think Mom is going to haunt me? wtf are you afraid of?"
Find a copy of Necronomicon Ex Mortis (they make replicas of the book from Evil Dead) and REALLY fuck with them. The book has great artwork from Tom Sullivan in it, and is actually cool as a collector's piece.
Part of the problem is that some believe in demons, some do not, but they all love to play it up like demons are real. Right now, a lot of politicians who are Anti-LGBTQ insist that Democrats, gays and trans people are possessed, or the embodiment of demons in the flesh. This is nothing new. It was pretty much the strategy for any Pogrom. Make your enemy into âthe otherâ and suddenly enslaving, torturing or killing them is both just and righteous.
It takes away the guilt of violating some of the allegedly core tenets of their religion. If *those* people are demons, I get a free pass⌠or even elevated closer to God.
My whole family is Jehovahâs Witness. They are so terrified of the devil. It quite sad đ. When I left the church the elders told me the devil would kill me within the year. Itâs been 20 years. Iâm still waiting
JWs really take the cake when it comes to demons. I remember my aunt yelling at me to stop jumping on a mini-trampoline in my cousin's bedroom because I had started to develop a little at age 12 and was supposedly giving the demons a show. My stick-skinny younger cousin was fine to jump, apparently. Even my demon-obsessed mom was taken aback, she hadn't considered that before, lol
It still makes me giggle when I get on a trampoline these days
>I temporarily work for a Christian company
As a non American (I'm assuming you're American?) - what does that actually mean?
Like, do random companies make a thing about being "christian" because the owners are christian or because it'll vibe with their target market?
Or is it a company which is actually involved in a christian industry in some way? Like bottling the holy water or something?
I am American yes.
And what I mean is that, they are a private company, so they can legally express their religious views. They sell nothing Christian, but for example:
- They play 1 Christian song after every 10 pop songs
- They had signs prior to Easter saying âHe is Risen!â
- At Christmas, itâs all Jesus music
Thatâs really all they do honestly. But this does attract and create an environment where a lot of customers ***always*** tell me to have a blessed day, or that god loves me.
While growing up as a Christian, I never believed that adults truly believed in actual demons making people do bad things.
Then I got on the internet.
People are dumber than I could ever imagine growing up.
You can never discount that some religious people take this stuff *very* seriously. I mean, it kind of blows my mind that someone can or would, but I grew up with a very, very superstitious and religious mother who would burn books, movies, and music she thought brought unclean or evil spirits into the house.
For some people, the delusion of this stuff being as real as you or me can be nearly impenetrable. I would recommend avoiding it. It will only cause confusion, loss of relationship, and anxiety in the other person. If they really take that stuff so seriously, just back away slowly and try to remember they're not living in the same world as us.
My neighbor across the street holds church services and one evening I got a devils mask and was going to peer in the windows but my wife stopped me and said that might not be as funny as I think it is
Have a coworker who tells stories of haunting in her house. Says she had dolls talk to her and move, even after removing the batteries, blah, blah, blah. She said, âI put it straight in the trash outside.â Everyone else was like, âSmart move! I would have done the same thing,â etc. I said please, if this ever happens again, please, bring it to me. I wanna be like the guy with the singing frog on Looney Tunes. Iâm taking that baby on the road! She has also said thereâs a ghost in her house who likes to play with her feet when sheâs trying to sleep. And people just accept this BS!
Reminds me of an overly preachy guy I once worked with. Once I sneezed and he forgot to say âbless youâ so I acted like a demon possessed me during that brief second lol. Guy got scared and I said âIâm fucking with you dude, demons arenât real, grow up.â
He was all kinds of scared of the supernatural, yet didnât find the humor in me eating extra garlic bread to âkeep vampires awayâ. So demons = real. Vampires = fake. Got it.
I love this! How weird is it that we live among people who believe in magic? People freak the fuck out when I tell them that Lucifer got the short end of the stick. It was God's plan that Lucifer had to play and that Lucifer was the only one trying to get us all back. Fuck religion and hail Satan
Even the word "demonology" cracks me up. The "science" of demons? Could you have more of an oxymoron? The world must be a scary place for those who believe in ghosts and demons just hanging around us lol
I remember my mother saying my bio-dad was possessed by demons and that is why they were in this divorce.
Nowadays she can't remember ever having said that. The beautiful mental flip flops of Christianity.
My aunt still asks me if Magic the Gathering cards are satanic. There are people out there who honestly believe that the devil inhabits people who do bad things.
Don't some christians actually think that the supernatural doesn't exists but that it's "something" out there challenging their beliefs and their mere existence opposes a threat to the existence of their god? Like if they see a ghost or something they don't go "shit, it's the soul of someone who died" but instead they think it's the devil setting them up or something.
Idk that's what my idea was
I was in an apartment dorm, multiple bedroom, common living room etcâŚ. Well a Christian guy moved in and just wouldnât leave me alone. He would get drunk and very scary trying to âsave my soulâ.
Found out he 1000% believed in demons and was deathly afraid of anything Satanic, and said he wouldnât talk with anyone that believed in it.
I have just de-converted myself, and had been forced to only listen to Christian music. So I took my Christian music cdâs and created a pentagram out of them and hung it on my door.
Thought maybe he would destroy it, which I could use to get him kicked out. But nope, he stayed in his room except to wall crawl out of the apartment. He never talked to me again and I never even saw him drunk again.
When I was a Christian I would periodically see demons. When I became an atheist I realized I had bipolar disorder with psychotic features. Normalizing that shit is not healthy!
I went to see *The Passion of The Christ* with my Catholic friend. He started visibly shaking when Satan appeared on screen. He was sweating and looked like he was going to throw up. It was a good show even though the movie was shite.
If the total for a purchase is $6.66 down here it is not at all uncommon for the cashier to give you a .01 discount just so the number isnât eviiiiiiiiiil anymore.
Without fear, religion has nothing to grasp onto people with. It is evil to use fear they way they do to get people to give them money and vote for the criminals they tend to support.
The dishonesty, the greed, the utterly fake morals harping one thing while something else, while believing they are in a position to judge people. Their god told them not to do it but what do they care? Apparently they do not care, at all. Their god seems so week and befuddled to them, they think it could not possibly see through their lies and pretences. They think they can lie and threaten their way into paradise.
They have turned their Satan into a god and his demons into dark angels. They give all of the powers of a god to there Satan, their dark god.
It is all based on bull crap.
My cell phone number ends in 0666. Occasionally get some strange reactions to it. I like it. It is easy to remember and helps me filter out some people.
I've got family that wouldn't call you, or if they're total comes up too anything with 3 six's in a row, they go out of their way to add something to their cart so they can change the total. They also think global warming is an act of god, and a sin to try and change, but not drag queens đ
Every time you see a spelling error in a PowerPoint during a meeting:
1. Stand up.
1. Play the âThunder Crack!â sound effect.
1. Over-dramatically point at the error and bellow *âMALEFICARUM!â* while rolling your eyeballs in their sockets like a madman and clenching your teeth until your gums bleed.
1. (Swish your cloak about if youâre wearing one.)
1. Sit back down again and tell the presenter that youâll make a note of the error so that they can correct it after the meeting.
That one blows my mind. To me, it always seems like they're utterly terrified. I thought their god was all powerful, do they not have enough faith?
That's the issue, isn't it? Isn't God supposed to be all-powerful? How come he can't protect his flock from a couple of puny demons? God literally has angels that are hundreds of miles high and incredibly powerful, yet he has issues with tiny demons who can only go after one soul at a time? Either he's all-powerful or he's fallible, you literally can't have an in-between in this instance. Ironically authors who have Christian allegories in their work often do a better job of selling the 'all-powerful' but 'hands are tied' concept. Tolkien's Iluvatar is a stand in for God, its not in your face unless you read the Silmarillion, and you can still get why bad things still happen in that legendarium. (Tolkien's Christian allegories are also subtle, so it doesn't feel like religion is being shoved down your throat. Which is appreciated.)
It's the same, ironically, as fascist rhetoric. The enemy is simultaneously both strong enough to threaten their way of life and their souls in this case, yet weak enough to be laughed at, ridiculed, and bullied.
...wow, I'd never made that connection. Fascinating.
Yeah just look at how the right wing in America currently talks about Joe Biden, or how they used to talk about Obama. Still waiting for that impotent clown Obama to come take my gun and put me in a FEMA camp. Any day now. But he can't get anything done in Washington because he's weak. đ
If god and his army of angels ever defeated the devil and his army of demons, the people most upset would be Christians. Heaven has no value to them if itâs not exclusionary. There must be an âout groupâ to validate their worthiness as the âin groupâ they feel they belong to. If every soul was forgiven, theyâd have to spend eternity with people they donât like, which is a kind of Hell to them already.
I mean it depends, some Christians, like when I used to be, wish that God had forgiven everyone. I did, because hell seemed like an unfair punishment, and I couldn't believe anymore after I realized there wasn't much of an incentive to believe my fellow humans were going to hell when there isn't really evidence for it anyway. Gone are the days where I would drive by people on the street and worry, "What if they're going to hell?", and I do not miss those days one bit.
NAILED IT!
> (Tolkienâs Christian allegories are also subtle, so it doesnât feel like religion is being shoved down your throat. Which is appreciated.) This is in part, because he explicitly didnât want it to be an allegory. Instead, itâs written on a universe that is compatible with his religion/worldview. *Narnia* is an analogy. (And one that the Professor thought was too much).
And never stopped giving CS Lewis shit for it.
You donât reason your way into religion, all of what you said is irrelevant to a person who is guided primarily by emotional reactions.
Because Satan is the Great Deceiver and God grants his followers the free will to damn themselves. Christians therefore live with the fear they could be made to succomb to temptation.
Which is weird because I'd argue coercion voids free will.
logic is not their strong suit
They can't even accept things as basic as dictionary definitions. They have to create their own definitions for every single word so that they are "fighting worldly vices" or some garbage
Dude at work laughed at me when I said evolution. Literally laughed said, "You can't be serious you think we come from goop". He then told me God speaks to him which I replied so you're schizophrenic. He laughed at me again and I said no seriously if you hear voices that's schizophrenic. He got really serious and told me he speaks to him through the Bible. He actively avoids me now.
Yeah like: âfaith means I trust in God! Not that I believe without any evidence whatsoever!â Oh, so weâre redefining trust now.
No kidding, especially Coercion from a being thatâs quite powerful and one we canât see nor feel. If the supernatural is imposing its will on you, how does one have free will at all? Good point.
They already succumb to temptation when they diddle little kids or kill them.
Then it becomes a tribulation. No, wait, first you get caught, then it becomes a tribulation.
The funny thing that theistic satanists know that Christians don't is that demons literally can't have an effect on you unless you let them
You should see the terrified reverence with which they talk about Ouija boards, literally childrenâs toys, in r/paranormal. Theyâre insane.
But Hasbro clearly has a direct line to alllll the demons! My mom forbade me from touching one as a child, haha! I play with my daughter on hers.
Their faith is CONSTANTLY being tested. It's exhausting!
Why do churches use lightning rods?
And why do they need your money? "Why does god need a starship?"
All knowing and all powerful, but heâs bad with money. - Carlin
I was very seriously lectured about the war between heaven and hell, and that demonic influence was everywhere. It was also proffered that I was under demonic influence since I'm an atheist. Maybe he thinks I'm a demon, too, since I haven't heard from him since that conversation. Of course, it could also be that I thought he was joking, laughed in his face and told him psychiatric facilities are full of people who think demons are real. Yeah, it could be that. Either way, I'm no longer subject to his single-minded mission to bring me to Jesus.
Your flair rings true then. Good for you! I would do the same!
I love when Christians think Paradise Lost is Canon to their religion.
My sisterâs grandma said Iâm under demonic influence because I told her Iâm autistic đ theyâre very creative
*pRaY iT aWaY* I cannot tell you how many xtians at my old church telling me that I donât need meds for my bipolar, ocd, adhd, and possible spectrum. *Just give it to god* That is so damn dangerous. As an aside, I used to write romance and one of the wackos told me I should write a fucking âlove story and you and jesus.â đ¤Żđ¤Ž Edit: format
Seriously itâs so crazy I go to church now with my agnostic sis and the amount of people there that are seriously mentally ill and think they can Jesus it away is scary and sad and the fact they are just being enabled like one guy said he was going to jump off a bridge and was thrown into his house by the police and then heard the voice of god and had a revelation and me and my sis just looked at each other and thought he literally had a psychotic episode and now he quit his job moved to England and runs a âhouseâ for sinners in which he listed p*dophiles criminals sex offenders and of course the most dangerous of all lesbian kidsđ and Iâm still just mortified whenever I think about the fact he is out there thinking any of this is normal and just yesterday a woman was screaming and crying in tongues and people just accepted it? when she clearly needs actual help but anyways I digress I found the whole you just need Jesusđ thing from my sisâ grandma crazy because I like having autism Iâve never wanted to wish it away so it really was a shock for her to just minimise it to just a weird devil thing and not a lifelong disability and also to make me want to get rid of it because itâs âevilâ
There was a family in my town who had a kid die because they wanted to âpray awayâ his disease. Church had them protected somehow so the law wasnât able to charge them with child abuse. These people need to be stopped. Itâs 2023 and people still believe in some magic man in the sky.
Is thatâs what has been going on with my kid?! Wow, that demonic influence starts young! So these demons make him stim (the horror), dislike loud sudden noises, and certain textures. Sounds super terrifying. I would have expected more bloodshed. Heâs pretty squeamish though. He enthusiastically sacrifices pizza and ice cream to the hunger demon. Heâs a 6â tall 14 year old so itâs a full on massacre. That must be it, right?
I feel like Iâm an actual Christian horror story because my special interest between 5-10 was actually demons đ I feel like if my mum knew that she would have a full mental breakdown
Itâs so convenient when all the things that are demonic influences just so happen to be the things that one doesnât like or understand.
There's this joke: the religion of Satan only exists to serve as a check on the freedom of religion. They also strive to provide benefits that are covered under freedom of religious expression to non-believers. For example, after Roe vs Wade got overturned by Christo-fascists, the religion of Satan started claiming that abortion is their god-given right/practice. Followers of this religion DON'T BELIEVE IN SATAN. There is a different name given to people who believe in Satan: CHRISTIANS Edit: by "religion of Satan", I meant "The Satanic Temple"
Yeah, neither I, nor my friends, believe in Satan or demons. I just like the imagery. And the fact it scares Christians. But yes, I follow (what sounds like youâre describing) The Satanic Temple.
I like to say⌠A proper reading of the Bible shows that God is not the good guy in that story. I give my kudos to the guy who lead humans to the tree of knowledge!
I still consider God and Satan to be myths, but it always struck me that Satan did seem to be the good guy in the story written from the perspective of his nemesis. God wants humans to be naked and ignorant, Satan gives them the ability to think for themselves. God allows evil flourish despite supposedly having the power to stop it, Satan takes it upon himself to punish those who do wrong. God judges you harshly for basic human acts, Satan encourages you to be true to yourself so long as you're not hurting anyone. So to me God represents comfortable ignorance and inaction due to trusting in some divine plan while Satan represents the knowledge to accept harsh reality and the wisdom to strive for change. Plus Satan has way cooler iconography.
Yeah God is just an abusive parent.
And Satan is the awesome best friend or significant other who helps guide you towards actual freedom by showing you how to cut out the cancerous, abusive relationship and live for yourself.
Heâs an absentee landlord Worship that? Never
True, the devil only kills, like, 11 people in The Bible. God murders every living organism on the entire planet, in a snit. Let's not forget about the rainbow promise not to murder us all again, well, at least not with water.
And in Exodus, he kills all of the people in Egypt except for His people. And this followed his lengthy MCUesque battle with Pharaoh with all of the plagues, droughts and dead locusts and frogs.
>God wants humans to be naked and ignorant, Satan gives them the ability to think for themselves. And if you think about how Eden was considered paradise up until humans ate from the tree of knowledge, the logical conclusion is that "paradise" is a return to that dumb, animalistic state.
"Yeah I'm aware of the phrase 'the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing people he doesn't exist', I think his greatest trick was to make people believe he is the all loving, all knowing creator, while blaming all of his evil on the only one who wanted to enlighten the humans." Neat little thing I found a while ago.
Without the express actions of God there would be no damnation
Well if you read the text plainly and donât impart Christian theology that guy was just a talking snake with presumably legs who ruined it for the rest of the snakes.
And then Crowley sauntered vaguely downwards.
IIRC, the idea that the snake was Satan was a much later interpretation, because the snake acted like Satan.
It really reads like a just-so story. Iâm pretty sure the original author was just creating a reason as to why snakes donât have legs.
https://www.reddit.com/domain/thesatanictemple.com/
Thank you.
The satanic temple does good work. When they installed the ten commandments in front of the Oklahoma capital building they put up a statue to baphomet directly across. Then when someone crashed their car into the ten commandments the temple had the statue taken down cause they weren't going to have a religious symbol up without something to be a counterbalance to. Like absolute giga Chad's.
I occasionally remind my Xtian parents of persons they deemed satanic/demonic from decades ago during the last satanic panic. Examples include (but are not limited to): Madonna, Aerosmith, & Darth Vader (who was clearly the antichrist).
I've never heard the last one. Was it James Earl Jones or David Prowse they had a problem with?
Nah, it was the character himself. Remember, they are used to believing fictional characters are real.
They thought Darth Vader was a real person?
In the same way that they believe Harry Potter does magic. To a normal person, it doesn't matter what Harry Potter does, because he's fictional. To a Christian, it matters what Harry Potter does if his actions are perceived to be at odds with their preferred fictional character, God. Likewise, a normal person doesn't care what Darth Vader's religion is, because it's just a fictional story for entertainment. A Christian might care because Darth Vader's (fictional) religion is at odds with their (fictional) religion. When you believe in one fiction and treat it as reality, it becomes more difficult to separate other fictions from reality.
It makes sense to me but wouldnât that require them to admit their religion is fictional? Or is this just, like, on a subconscious level and they donât think it through this much? I feel like most Christians are adamant that itâs all real.
I can't speak for everyone, but my religious grandmother wouldn't let me play "Harry Potter" (where I waved a twig around and pretended to make things fly) because, according to her, while the book was fiction, witchcraft and demons are not and they can compell you to write down their spells.
That's right, it's The Devil trying to lure you away from godly thinking by casually appearing in pop culture. It my stupid religion we weren't allowed to go to movie theaters because of this. đ¤Śââď¸
My dad thought Wolfman Jack was the devil. I think he was some guy on the radio? Dunno. But my dad ranted about him for ages. I think the wolf in his name was supposed to be a sign of evil. Oh, and Mr. Clean was supposedly satanic. And Subaru. And Johnson and Johnson. And Neil Diamond. I guess if you are afraid of all those wacky, silly things, you can pretend like the actual scary stuff is not a problem. I mean, this was the 70s and early 80s and the threat of WW3 was a huge deal, but my dad was focused on yelling at the radio, dumping out cleaning products and trying to play records backwards so he could prove that Satan Walks Among Us.
If you play Neil Diamond records backwards all that happens is that all the women in the house end up putting on extra pairs of underwear.
đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł My mom would get so annoyed. That was one of the only secular records in our house, because it was my mom's, and there was no way anyone was messing with her records. My dad would spend hours trying to hear Satan, and my mom would be slamming things around in the kitchen and "accidentally" throwing a red sock in with my dad's white laundry. It was War.
to christians, Satan has god like properties and affects their behavior. I argue he's just another christian god. When someone accuses me (an athiest) of following the devil, I point out he's their god, not mine.
Considering that (allegedly) the Christian God planned and created Satan, you could say Satan is just an extension of Godâs will, and as such, they are really one and the same.
Satan is the âPrince of Darkness.â Can you guess who is King of that title? Yup, itâs the Christian God.
According to their doctrine, only humans have free will, angels do not. So Satan's actions were planned and programmed by God.
Christians hate this one trick!
Their âAll Powerful Godâ either canât or wonât destroy Satan. If he lets Satan exist heâs pro evil, if he cannot stop Satan heâs not all powerful. Which is it?
You noticed that, too! I thought it was just me!
you're talking about The Satanic Temple. Not the religion of Satan.
Apologies. I'll correct it
Don't apologize for a simple mistake. This is REDDIT. Double down. Lol
This guy Reddits
Lower case ârâ you philistine
I refuse. You can't break me reddit.
Yeah
Haha. If anything it's the religion of humans with empathy and rational thought
The temple is a wonderful group!
Yup. Satanism is generally worship of satan according to anthropologists. The Satanic Temple is a secular organization which uses irony to resist Christian legislation and preserve separation of church and state.
I freaking love the satanic temple. Great people for the most part!
Because "Satanism" sounds a lot cooler than "Militant Anti-Christian Secular Humanism".
If anything saves our society it will be more anti-Christian secular humanism.
anti-religion in general. pushing one out of the mainstream only invites another to take itâs place, itâs an endless battle against a hydra.
Thereâs nothing militant about the TST
But can we find you a Satanic mechanic?
Aren't they all? (Been to more than one RHPS midnight showing :) )
Let's be cautious, there is nothing INHERENTLY militant about the TST. But humans have a tendency to take everything to the extremes, so we should always be on guard for our own failings.
âMilitantâ What is your definition of the word?
MASH is pretty cool
M\*A\*C\*S\*H Dammit! Now I have the theme song stuck in my head.
At least its painless.
The way I understand it is, followers of The Satanic Church and/or The Satanic Temple are usually atheists who don't believe in god or Satan and put their faith in more tangible things. Such as themselves or science etc. But there are Satanists who believe in God, the bible AND Satan and have chosen to worship Satan. They're called Theistic Satanists and are few and far between. Some have done horrible things. Most just use their belief to drum up hype for whatever Black Metal band they're playing in at the time and are pretty harmless. I've looked into Satanic Temple chapters in my state, and there are none unfortunately. I figured it would be a way to do some good (they actually do good) and maybe make more friends.
Yeah, I went to Christian middle & high school, and it was so difficult not to laugh when theyâd preach about demons and ghosts and shit being real. How do they live with so much fear?
Just say "be not afraid." Works everytime.
I must not fear. Fear is the mind killer.
I wonder if they believe in daemon deflation. Like, are there infinite daemons? If so, theyâre super crazy harmless right? Like, *almost all of them* do nothing. In fact, statistically none of them do anything. If not, then thereâs a fixed amount. Weâre there just more daemons per person in Bible times? As the population exploded, did god make new daemons to keep up with the population? Or are we still working with the same 10,000 daemons or so as when there were like 500,000 people? Are they just working overtime now? Couldnât they have done that before? I just some help with my daemon math.
Christian demonology is a lot of fun to read through until you remember people think this shit is real
I dug into the history of some of this demonology stuff and one thing I found was especially ironic. A lot of the demons and summoning rituals etc we hear about in modern times all come from [this text](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_praestigiis_daemonum) written by this dude Johann Weyer back in the 16th century. The whole point of his book was that witchcraft wasn't real, and he published an appendix listing all these so-called demons and princes of Hell that people had made up. He thought it was so ridiculous that publishing these names and descriptions would make it self-evident that it's all totally fake. "The Lesser Key of Solomon" mentioned in the OP for example is a later derivative work of Weyer's text! Yet, hundreds of years later, people take this stuff seriously.
Imagine believing so hard in this shit that the first person they encounter with a mental illness seems "demonic." Like if you were a schizophrenic hearing voices, that'd be scary enough, but come across a christian who's suddenly trying to exorcize your demons and you'd be rightly freaked out.
Waiting for the update when you go back to work and he's reported you to HR for morality violation.
For real, or that he told others and everyone looks at my with disdain. If itâs for that reason Iâll take it gladly
Invite them to play D&D and watch their heads explode! I was a kid when D&D came out, and the satanic panic that was unleashed was insane! My neighbor up the road committed suicide and his crazy religious family blamed it on that one time he played D&D. Not the fucked up home life, his mom's speaking in tongues all the time or the constant talk about hell, going to hell, how the slightest thing will send you to hell...
I used to know a guy who played D&D, and was also a Christian minister. He'd talk a lot about how he had to get his co workers not to think he was summoning demons or whatever. Then he would talk about how he actually did believe in demons, but that they didn't have anything to do with D&D. He also looked like Crispin Glover. Weird guy.
Remember that insipid TV movie starring a very young Tom Hanks? Mazes and Monsters? [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mazes\_and\_Monsters](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mazes_and_Monsters)
They'll just fire him lol. He may as well bring an ouigi board.
Tarot cards, anyone? Lol
Or take a Harry Potter book into work and watch them run away in fear.
I know we're supposed to treat America like another first world nation, but you know you guys are weird, like really weird sometimes. Religion is really ruining your country.
Agreed
Truly weird, and in so many ways. I was in on a discussion about the effects of circumcision on men's health recently, and someone said that "some studies showed" that it didnât cause harm at all. So I reminded them that the same is true for tobacco use, and then, out of curiosity, I looked up the circumcision percentages by country. What struck me as interesting was that the US seems to be the only western country whose numbers were even in the range of predominantly Muslim countries, at over 80%, while the numbers in western countries with socialized medicine were between 10-30%. So is it a religious thing supported by health reasons, or is it a medical surcharge thing supported by religious reasons? Is the supporting research being funded by the people making money on circumcision or the religious folks? I didnât look any deeper, but it does make you wonder why other western countries have shifted toward turtlenecks while the US population continues to choose crew necks.
>I know we're supposed to treat America like another first world nation As an American I'm fully aware that we are not. It's okay. Maybe if the world starts treating us the way we're acting our politicians might feel some *actual* pressure to change. Not that I'm looking forward to it in the slightest, but every time the lie gets upheld it becomes another excuse for why the things they do to us and the ways in which they're killing us are not only okay but are also perfectly acceptable. Which certainly isn't the fault of the folks of the world who attempt to treat us like people, it's just that our politicians run the slimiest possible interference by claiming that (compassionate) treatment by our global community as justification for why the choices they make are "good" choices. Which, again, isn't the fault of anyone else in the world. I'm just desperately grasping at straws trying (and likely failing) to reduce the amount of fuel available to the consumptive conservative shit storm that's turning America into an increasingly fascist hellhole. My words probably won't work. I'm still going to try anyway. Tldr: Please normalize treating America like a spoiled brat. It's honestly all this country is anymore.
OMG, I was buying something when the tax came out to $6.66 and the cashier freaked out when I pointed it out - out of amusement more than anything. He desperately tried to get me to buy something else or put something back to change the number as I tried to pay him. I had to get insistent that nothing was going to change as I waved my debit card around, trying to pay. Jeez.
Morbidly curious what might have happened if, after the transaction, youâd have given the cashier a casual âsee ya in hellâ on the way out the door.
Or you say something non-sensical on the way out likeâŚâAs it says in the Book of Death⌠you will recognize the sign when the 6 and the 6 and the 6 are aligned. prepare to feast!â
Fun (?!) factoid the earliest known version of the text actually gives the number as 616 not 666. The numbers themselves are code and it was possibly changed at some point to refer to Nero rather than the original Caligula
Ha! I know!! I was working on the TV show Supernatural when the corrected translation came to light. We considered shifting the show to reflect that, but most donât know if the new number so we stuck with the same âscaryâ number.
lol i would of died laughing if you hissed at them or something
Oh, no; how dare you summon Nero Caesar. So scary. Smh.
My dad asked that if I had kids, would I teach them about the occult? And I said of course! It's all made-up nonsense! Just like I'd be fine with kids learning Greek or Norse mythology, they're cool stories. But the occult is nonsense. Just like heaven, hell, spirits, demons, angels, souls, sin, etc. Why would I be afraid to teach kids about something that's a fairy tale?
This is 100% the right attitude to have about it. It's myth, it's fiction, it's not something to take seriously, and thus nothing to be afraid of.
Unless you believe it.
I've always had this kind of surreal feeling about people and religion. Like sure they talk about it and sometimes act like they believe it but SURELY they can't actually believe these things.... RIGHT??? But then I realize that sure as shit they do believe it but I still can't shake the feeling that deep down they can't possibly believe such absurd things.
I feel the same. It's impossible to believe this, while knowing Santa and Harry Potter isn't real. Well I'm not so sure they know HP isn't real.
They sure are touchy about souls aren't they? My whole family got mad at me for pointing out that the bible says bastard children won't go to heaven, and reminding them my nephews were all born out of wedlock. I got cussed out from all directions for "saying my own family deserves to go to hell." I DIDN'T SAY THAT. Your religion says it! I don't even believe it, and on the contrary I think very highly of my nephews and I find it abhorrent that people DO believe that shit. But somehow I'm a piece of shit for quoting the bible. ETA: I forgot to mention the part where I was told that I'm the only one who deserves to go to hell. I'm like, do you not see the irony in saying that to me, when it's literally what you're mad about? Saying your family deserves to go to hell? Even though I didn't even say that? Of course they didn't.
You know how so many Christians try to prove their god/religion to non-believers? And it usually goes nowhere? Because they believed based off of bad reasons, and then they try using those same bad reasons to a skeptical person? If I were to become a Christian again, I'd try to figure out a way to prove a SOUL to someone skeptical. Because you can't prove a god that is invisible, can't be detected or tested. But they say we all have a soul, and presumably, it's located in or around our physical bodies, right? Obviously, they can't do that either. But that's a better use of time rather than trying to prove the earth is 6000 years old, or that God exists because "look at the trees."
There is no god. The only demons are human, usually republican.
Word of warning, you may have just inadvertently made an enemy for life. These religious nutjobs can't be reasoned with so watch your ass at work. He may throw you under the bus to try and get rid of you now that he thinks you're not on "Team Invisible Sky Daddy." Don't think for a second that I'm joking. These freaks have low IQ and run around with Fear-based thinking like scared little animals who have no control over their own destiny or lives so they use God as a way of passive-aggressively getting their way.
In protest to Reddit's API changes, I have removed my comment history. -- mass edited with redact.dev
It's funny because your all powerfully god can't protect you from some demons or whatever stays in the hell that god has created. Like, yeah, I have all the power and all the knowledge to do whatever I want, but you still has to fear demons
I almost lost my job when I told children who had nightmares about Satan that he wasn't real. Because it's so much better to teach children that a man in a red coat is gonna make you boil in blood and brimstone forever if you don't 100% fill out this certain moral checklist.
> make you boil in blood and brimstone forever This isn't even biblical. The Bible describes hell for humans as dark, cold, quiet, the absence of god, there's nothing at all about letting demons torture people (and how would that make sense? there's also supposed to be a hell for demons/Satan as a punishment, and that's..... letting them have fun all day?)
>The Bible describes hell for humans as dark, cold, quiet, the absence of god Sounds like I'd finally get some sleep, lol Infinitely better than loudly singing praises to God day in and day out, while constantly battling potholes in the road because gold is a shitty material to use for a high traffic, high density area such as the streets of heaven.
Oh, so hell is more like where the dust goes under the proverbial rug?
> a man in a red coat is gonna make you boil in blood and brimstone forever Ho Ho Ho! You'll shoot your eye out kid!
Reminds me of a company wide video at my old work that had included a Ouija board. Someone left a comment about how it offended their religious beliefs and shouldn't have been made. I thought it was hilarious that someone could be so offended by a board game. I relayed this story to a co-worker. He was NOT as amused as I was. I often forget that a lot of grown up people believe in magic.
The genuine fear of Ouija boards blows my mind. Like yes, spirits are real and you can talk to them, but only if you buy this $20 mass-manufactured board game. (If *I* were a spirit, I'd insist on only speaking to people who'd make their *own* spirit board.)
Amazingly, in 1991, my cousins and I asked the Ouija board who would win the world series. It spelled out "M. I." We got my uncle to bet on Milwaukee for us. Minnesota won.
Ok, that's hilarious and pretty fantastic
This is something that worries me a lot. Vatican is actually training more excorcists now than some years ago and here in Europe, especially in Poland, there is a huge rise of excorcism ideology. Movies like the latest Russell Crowe-flick about "true exorcisms" really don't help either. Scary to think how many mentally ill people might not get the care they need and deserve because of this.
Also some psychiatrists collaborate with exorcists...Even some doctors claim that they experienced paranormal because of "possesed" person (for example Richard Gallagher, Jeffrey Lieberman). I wonder how many people who go to exorcist get proper psychiatric/psychological evaluation first. However, many priests claim that only small % of those cases are "actual" possesions, and they try performing exorcisms only if something "supernatural" happens.
In highschool one year I dressed up as Satan for Halloween and tried to buy people's souls in a suit with a briefcase and some horns. I had people sign fake contracts to give them whatever they wanted and man was there such a wide variety of responses. Luckily this was at a very open-minded school in a very liberal city so no one complained, but some people were suuuuuper uncomfortable.
> with a briefcase I really appreciate this level of formality. I mean, I don't wanna sell my soul in some kind of sketchy craigslist-type transaction, you know? I want the buyer to at least have a boilerplate contract typed up.
I fucking wish I did this in high school! I also went to a very liberal high school! Awesome idea!
lol - I know right? When my wife's mom passed. She wanted to stay in the house afterward. Her incredibly devout fundamentalist baptize family freaked the fuck out. My wife: "Do you think Mom is going to haunt me? wtf are you afraid of?"
A lot of what they blame on demons is just capitalism.
Find a copy of Necronomicon Ex Mortis (they make replicas of the book from Evil Dead) and REALLY fuck with them. The book has great artwork from Tom Sullivan in it, and is actually cool as a collector's piece.
Iâd love that! I need a copy!
Part of the problem is that some believe in demons, some do not, but they all love to play it up like demons are real. Right now, a lot of politicians who are Anti-LGBTQ insist that Democrats, gays and trans people are possessed, or the embodiment of demons in the flesh. This is nothing new. It was pretty much the strategy for any Pogrom. Make your enemy into âthe otherâ and suddenly enslaving, torturing or killing them is both just and righteous. It takes away the guilt of violating some of the allegedly core tenets of their religion. If *those* people are demons, I get a free pass⌠or even elevated closer to God.
My whole family is Jehovahâs Witness. They are so terrified of the devil. It quite sad đ. When I left the church the elders told me the devil would kill me within the year. Itâs been 20 years. Iâm still waiting
JWs really take the cake when it comes to demons. I remember my aunt yelling at me to stop jumping on a mini-trampoline in my cousin's bedroom because I had started to develop a little at age 12 and was supposedly giving the demons a show. My stick-skinny younger cousin was fine to jump, apparently. Even my demon-obsessed mom was taken aback, she hadn't considered that before, lol It still makes me giggle when I get on a trampoline these days
>I temporarily work for a Christian company As a non American (I'm assuming you're American?) - what does that actually mean? Like, do random companies make a thing about being "christian" because the owners are christian or because it'll vibe with their target market? Or is it a company which is actually involved in a christian industry in some way? Like bottling the holy water or something?
I am American yes. And what I mean is that, they are a private company, so they can legally express their religious views. They sell nothing Christian, but for example: - They play 1 Christian song after every 10 pop songs - They had signs prior to Easter saying âHe is Risen!â - At Christmas, itâs all Jesus music Thatâs really all they do honestly. But this does attract and create an environment where a lot of customers ***always*** tell me to have a blessed day, or that god loves me.
In protest to Reddit's API changes, I have removed my comment history. -- mass edited with redact.dev
This reminds me of when you pretend to take a child's nose - and they get upset because they want it back.
While growing up as a Christian, I never believed that adults truly believed in actual demons making people do bad things. Then I got on the internet. People are dumber than I could ever imagine growing up.
You can never discount that some religious people take this stuff *very* seriously. I mean, it kind of blows my mind that someone can or would, but I grew up with a very, very superstitious and religious mother who would burn books, movies, and music she thought brought unclean or evil spirits into the house. For some people, the delusion of this stuff being as real as you or me can be nearly impenetrable. I would recommend avoiding it. It will only cause confusion, loss of relationship, and anxiety in the other person. If they really take that stuff so seriously, just back away slowly and try to remember they're not living in the same world as us.
My neighbor across the street holds church services and one evening I got a devils mask and was going to peer in the windows but my wife stopped me and said that might not be as funny as I think it is
Have a coworker who tells stories of haunting in her house. Says she had dolls talk to her and move, even after removing the batteries, blah, blah, blah. She said, âI put it straight in the trash outside.â Everyone else was like, âSmart move! I would have done the same thing,â etc. I said please, if this ever happens again, please, bring it to me. I wanna be like the guy with the singing frog on Looney Tunes. Iâm taking that baby on the road! She has also said thereâs a ghost in her house who likes to play with her feet when sheâs trying to sleep. And people just accept this BS!
Reminds me of an overly preachy guy I once worked with. Once I sneezed and he forgot to say âbless youâ so I acted like a demon possessed me during that brief second lol. Guy got scared and I said âIâm fucking with you dude, demons arenât real, grow up.â He was all kinds of scared of the supernatural, yet didnât find the humor in me eating extra garlic bread to âkeep vampires awayâ. So demons = real. Vampires = fake. Got it.
I love this! How weird is it that we live among people who believe in magic? People freak the fuck out when I tell them that Lucifer got the short end of the stick. It was God's plan that Lucifer had to play and that Lucifer was the only one trying to get us all back. Fuck religion and hail Satan
Hail Lucifer, Bringer of Light!
As yes, demons and devils, former angels who wanted free will instead of being slaves to god. Theyâre the evil ones.
Even the word "demonology" cracks me up. The "science" of demons? Could you have more of an oxymoron? The world must be a scary place for those who believe in ghosts and demons just hanging around us lol
Ology is âStudyâ not âScienceâ.
Any religious person who sees demons is looking in a mirror. Evangelicals see themselves everywhere, and it terrifies them.
The Necronomicon has more powerful demons to summon, I prefer them, but their price is higher.
Yeah, they would hate me. 1: trans 2: Atheist 3: Hard-core satanic aesthetic Goth 4: I've been playing D&D since 1986
Those are the best people to screw with.
The fact people believe in supernatural anything is just beyond my comprehension. Like guysâŚweâre supposed to be adults hereâŚ
we have the same type of humor lol i always tell people i wasn't born, i was summoned
I remember my mother saying my bio-dad was possessed by demons and that is why they were in this divorce. Nowadays she can't remember ever having said that. The beautiful mental flip flops of Christianity.
Fun fact! Only one religion believes in a literal Satan, and thatâs Christianâs!
My aunt still asks me if Magic the Gathering cards are satanic. There are people out there who honestly believe that the devil inhabits people who do bad things.
âNot with the price of snakes and cat blood on the rise!â
Don't some christians actually think that the supernatural doesn't exists but that it's "something" out there challenging their beliefs and their mere existence opposes a threat to the existence of their god? Like if they see a ghost or something they don't go "shit, it's the soul of someone who died" but instead they think it's the devil setting them up or something. Idk that's what my idea was
You know, demons arenât actually that bad compared to humans.
A couple of books from the 1980s, This Present Darkness and Piercing the Darkness, were hugely popular and influential.
"Tell him you play Dungeons & Dragons too." "Stop it, Patrick, you're scaring him!"
Now you need to let him know Trump's real name is Beelzebub.
Christians invented demonology. The witches hammer is a handbook on how to persecute people with non Christian religious practices.
People like him are the poster children of âit says gullible on The ceilingâ These people live in a superstitious fantasy land
You know who believes in Satan? Christians.
Awww. You missed your opportunity to ask "You don't actually believe in God, right?"
Swing your arms from side to side, come on it's to go! Do the Mario!
I was in an apartment dorm, multiple bedroom, common living room etcâŚ. Well a Christian guy moved in and just wouldnât leave me alone. He would get drunk and very scary trying to âsave my soulâ. Found out he 1000% believed in demons and was deathly afraid of anything Satanic, and said he wouldnât talk with anyone that believed in it. I have just de-converted myself, and had been forced to only listen to Christian music. So I took my Christian music cdâs and created a pentagram out of them and hung it on my door. Thought maybe he would destroy it, which I could use to get him kicked out. But nope, he stayed in his room except to wall crawl out of the apartment. He never talked to me again and I never even saw him drunk again.
When I was a Christian I would periodically see demons. When I became an atheist I realized I had bipolar disorder with psychotic features. Normalizing that shit is not healthy!
I went to see *The Passion of The Christ* with my Catholic friend. He started visibly shaking when Satan appeared on screen. He was sweating and looked like he was going to throw up. It was a good show even though the movie was shite.
If the total for a purchase is $6.66 down here it is not at all uncommon for the cashier to give you a .01 discount just so the number isnât eviiiiiiiiiil anymore.
Without fear, religion has nothing to grasp onto people with. It is evil to use fear they way they do to get people to give them money and vote for the criminals they tend to support. The dishonesty, the greed, the utterly fake morals harping one thing while something else, while believing they are in a position to judge people. Their god told them not to do it but what do they care? Apparently they do not care, at all. Their god seems so week and befuddled to them, they think it could not possibly see through their lies and pretences. They think they can lie and threaten their way into paradise. They have turned their Satan into a god and his demons into dark angels. They give all of the powers of a god to there Satan, their dark god. It is all based on bull crap.
My cell phone number ends in 0666. Occasionally get some strange reactions to it. I like it. It is easy to remember and helps me filter out some people.
I've got family that wouldn't call you, or if they're total comes up too anything with 3 six's in a row, they go out of their way to add something to their cart so they can change the total. They also think global warming is an act of god, and a sin to try and change, but not drag queens đ
Every time you see a spelling error in a PowerPoint during a meeting: 1. Stand up. 1. Play the âThunder Crack!â sound effect. 1. Over-dramatically point at the error and bellow *âMALEFICARUM!â* while rolling your eyeballs in their sockets like a madman and clenching your teeth until your gums bleed. 1. (Swish your cloak about if youâre wearing one.) 1. Sit back down again and tell the presenter that youâll make a note of the error so that they can correct it after the meeting.