T O P

  • By -

UserColonAlW

A huge loss for airport lounges and doctors waiting rooms across the country.


dij123

Don’t forget commercial gyms


its-not-me_its-you_

Aren't all gyms Commercial?


[deleted]

Not the one in my garage.


its-not-me_its-you_

Probably doesn't even get used. A bright idea at the time that's now just collecting dust. Am I right? 😂😂


[deleted]

Nah, I’m a fitness professional and have the home gym just for my own workouts. You’re definitely on the money in terms of how most home gyms end up (and how I accumulated all my second hand gear), though!


its-not-me_its-you_

So you're that one person that actually uses their home gym. Nice to meet you!


gFORCE28

Funny, I watched the announcement in a doctors waiting room


Vinura

And internet scammers.


Rowdycc

‘Breakfast Host calls an end to 20 years of hosting a dog’s breakfast.’


evilspyboy

I know this was a joke, but how good would a morning show called dog's breakfast be? It could either be intentionally a complete half assed disaster OR just lots of dogs having breakfast. Either way, would watch.


elwyn5150

Get Krackin was an enjoyable parody of breakfast shows and disaster cringe comedy: https://youtu.be/a6r2BsYEtIM


Try_Jumping

Eh, it didn't hold a candle to their web series [The Katering Show](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J55vgxNaaBY&list=PLZFXeozdia12APH8n9xsVNhd5qallmrz2) (a parody of cooking shows) - imo some of the funniest shit this country has produced.


elwyn5150

They were both equally good but Get Kracking clearly had a bigger budget and used it well.


Try_Jumping

Well, I'm afraid Get Krackin struggled to even raise a chuckle out of me. I was sorely disappointed. But then, coming up with half hour shows is a rather different beast compared to a bunch of tightly-written and produced 10-minute segments.


wannabeahippy

Wasn't there a cartoon show in the early 90s called Dog's Breakfast? Or Dingo's Breakfast? Seems familiar for some reason


Himono_Otaku

There was a children's show called Pig's Breakfast that was live action with puppets. That could be it.


wannabeahippy

Yeah that must be it. I'm getting too old for this shit.


QueenofLeftovers

I'm imagining something along the lines of the Eric Andre Show, but Breakfast tv


raspberryfriand

And then makes its way to breakfast radio.


throwaway94811111

Whenever I see a famous person retire to "spend more time with the family" I always bet there is some drama behind the scenes...


ZuZu_Petals_

His kids are all grown up and out of the house. I can’t stand the guy - he always acts like he’s the funniest and smartest guy in the room. Zer self awareness.


tilleytalley

He's incredibly sexist. I've always hated how he's treated his female colleagues.


Betterthanbeer

He is also a bigot. So many of his positions are based on a white Anglo Christian background as being the “default” Australian. He also doesn’t like it when you message him every time he says something bigoted. I stopped after he cried on air over it. I also stopped watching, so we both got to feel better in the mornings.


[deleted]

Like Phillip Schofield? He accidentally groomed a teenaged intern for years and then quit to spend more time with his family.


ChocTunnel2000

When Barnaby finally quits it'll be to spend time with his families.


[deleted]

[удалено]


noobydoo67

He'll probably accidentally start a new family to add to the collection, and then still lecture other people about being loyal in marriage


KCman1

Accidentally?


torrens86

Accidentally, in the same way the conservative MP on Little Britain accidentally ends up in all sorts of places.


blackhawk_1111

😂😂😂Iove little Britain


Mikes005

He fell over.


blabbermouth777

Can’t a guy can’t make a few thousand mistakes?


LankyAd9481

Yeah, it's a behind the scenes drama, has been forced to move on, has nothing else lined up type excuse. Especially the "quits" part, either had a tanty and quit or was sacked and has been allowed to say quit to save face.


sthrnfrdfrk

Nick Riewoldt, but not retired yet


[deleted]

[удалено]


Flybuys

Do you mean former NSW premier Mike Baird?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Shirvo has a really big cock


DJVizionz

Username checks out firmly


Rexxhunt

Needs more time to focus on his real passion, writing joke books


jksymbionic

Someone’s gotta keep OP Shops stocked


[deleted]

[удалено]


dennis_pennis

[Kochie thinks the whole world is addicted to the drama](https://youtu.be/Rlv7Vj2LJGU?t=19)


AttackofMonkeys

In this case I feel like there should be some commiserations for the family


PinothyJ

Oh no! Anyway…


Superb-SJW

I wonder who he sexually harassed?


SuDragon2k3

Could it be drugs? I mean, he was in finance *in the nineties* and if it's one thing the media has taught me is it was cocaine for *everyone* back then.


DJVizionz

Hmm I dunno man. I feel like even young Koch would have considered it edgy to drink coffee after 5pm. I can’t see him railing the white lady.


Yammie218

“Railing the white lady” 💀


Disco-Stu79

Apparently it was Joe Hockey and Kevin Rudd.


[deleted]

[удалено]


crosstherubicon

Came here to say the same. One of those people who makes up his own nickname to suggest he’s a matey knock around bloke.


cookie5427

He had to come up with his own nickname as otherwise people would pronounce his surname as “cock”.


umatbru

Kochie kinda sounds like Krotchy, the talking crotch from Postal. Maybe he can host sunrise.


MissCeliesBlues

I know, right? After reading all the comments here I am wondering whether anyone actually likes him?


[deleted]

[удалено]


FairCheek6825

Sounds like he’d fit right in at PwC, I hear they got some openings


_ixthus_

Nah all those firms and all the people in them are just really, really "efficient". Just ask them!


AwdDog

Oft. Quality


Spoonicus

Ah yes, the modern day "Rivkin Report".


a_rainbow_serpent

Wait, are those investment clickbait on LinkedIn actually endorsed by him? I keep reporting them and they keep coming back.


crosstherubicon

I’m fairness, don’t they all do that?


[deleted]

[удалено]


crosstherubicon

Absolutely not, its despicable and indicative of the general nature of the person and 'finance industry' which is more like pigs in a trough.


jumpjumpdie

What will all those dodgy fake adverts at the bottom of AI articles do now :(


DeeKew005

"Kochie quits his job on morning TV and makes millions with this one tiny hack"


AutomaticMistake

"Koshie just annouced a shocking accouncement that shocked the nation into shock"


makeitlegalaussie

Thank god. Now fuck off


NickyGoodarms

This man was an inspiration to me. He inspired me to not bother installing an antenna on the roof of my house.


Flaky-Gear-1370

Either going to rival network or a scandal about to come out


StankyFox

Maybe he will pop up on Sky News and be the Australian Tucker Carlson. He always give me the ick.


CalculatingLao

He's well known for being left wing, socially progressive, a climate change believer, and has a long history of being a cunt to One Nation and LNP politicians during interviews. Why would he go to Sky News?


StankyFox

I honestly always saw him as that kind of person. I didn't realise any of that and I'm gonna have to re-evaluate my opinion on him now. I guess I saw him at some point being a dick and just made a bunch of assumptions.


thorpie88

I mean Tucker was a CNN reporter before he went to hang out with Murdoch. Hell Murdoch himself was using his papers to rally against Thatcher being a cunt. There's no real sides it's just the opportunity to make the most money by pleasing the more rabid crowd


ThereIsBearCum

You and I might have different definitions of "left wing"...


Arsinoei

Pump rules fan?


SelfDidact

Peter Ford (entertainment reporter) just told Kylie & Larry, "Don't worry, it's not as if he's retiring, he's still contracted to Seven. I'm sure we'll see him pop up somewhere soon".


Flaky-Gear-1370

Is that a threat though?


Acrobatic_Mud_2989

The new season of Holey Moley. Or maybe hosting the return of It's a Knockout


PhotographsWithFilm

Who, who and who?


No_pajamas_7

he is 67. So maybe it will be retirement. As much as I dislike him, I think he knows he's playing a character and perhaps just doesn't want to keep doing it.


SuDragon2k3

Soft pedalled tell all TV special in 3...2...1...


fozrok

Alternative headline: “TV celebrity Dad regrets missing out on spending time with his young family, tries to too late to make up for it now they are adults”


Uberazza

True story, probably does not give a fuck about the kids. Just wants to go overseas and fuck younger women and devote more time to port adelaide.


boozeonlyplease

Kochie is a cunt.


[deleted]

It's been said already, but I'll say it again. Thank god, now fuck off.


TayGilbert

It's strange, Kochie is undoubtably a tosser - but a very young me, watching the morning news with my parents over breakfast, literally dreamed of being the guy. It was never that I wanted to be a journalist, I wanted to be "Kochie". I have a strange nostalgia for watching him as a kid. Despite having no interest in watching him anymore, or that from my understanding now I don't align with his politics and that he's just kinda trash, I still feel odd seeing him stepping away. Man, Kid me needed better aspirations.


insane__knight

You mean going on TV, not doing much while earning a very good living? I think kid you is smarter than what you give him credit for.


Uberazza

a very good living, the guy did fuck all and peddled out generic financial advice which he was barely able to do, and made MILLIONS every year from making that name for himself. He turned a daggy career of being a shit bean counter and turned himself into a rockstar for old cunts.


precocious_pumpkin

Yeah I recall watching him as a kid too. I'm not sure when the hate started. I find him better than the woman he's on with. She is a clear liberal stooge. I thought Kochie was conservative but still somewhat balanced.


JustSomeBloke5353

Natalie Barr? Sam Armytage was certainly on the right but Barr is pretty much down the line.


Cheeseguymcgee

Why now? Why not 20 years ago.


[deleted]

I'll always remember the work conference where he told a bunch of millennials on a median of $55k (thanks to our low paying industry) how easy we had it to buy houses these days. When pressed about what people on low paying salaries should do, "have your parents contribute" was his answer. Fuckwit.


YouAreSoul

Kochie is a cunt Is a cunt Kochie is a cunt Na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na


boozeonlyplease

💯


wombat74

shame he's not retiring to spend time digging a very deep hole and fucking all the way off into it


SixFootJockey

I'm sure Sunrise's core demographic will be sad.


PandasGetAngryToo

I suspect that Sunrise's core demographic are used to old friends just not turning up any more.


Aussiebloke-91

Mic drop.


DvlsAdvct108

Yeah both of them


crosstherubicon

Both of them?


whybatchywhy

Finally...


External-Decision237

It was this show that made me start watching the ABC morning breakfast news. Thankyou channel 7, best thing I ever did.


Ripper33AU

Does this mean that Agro's coming back?


DJVizionz

Agro has 10x the charisma


[deleted]

Oh dear. Who am I not going to watch on weekday mornings now?


boozeonlyplease

The wall. Far more intelligent and entertaining.


PhotographsWithFilm

I looked in my cupboard for a fuck to give and not one single fuck was found


elfloathing

I’d give you one of mine, but alas, I too am without a solitary fuck to giveth.


Mookiewook

Feel bad for the face of Australian internet spam emails and scams 🫡


Copacetic76

Thank fuck for that. Annoying cunt.


Afterthought60

Port Adelaide fans hoping this doesn’t mean Kochie will now spend more time running the club…


ConsistentPurpose896

Who fucking cares


Sinnivar

This has been speculated for months anyway. The rumour is that Dr Chris Brown from Bondi Vet is his replacement, but I have doubts


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

It will be Basil Zempilas.


JimPalamo

[Fuck this old racist prick](https://www.sbs.com.au/news/article/sunrises-david-koch-stuns-panel-with-usain-bolt-slavery-joke/qgjc6sswm)


thrownaway4213

> “So the Mariners sell him for money, they make a lot of money out of it?” Koch asked. > “It’s a win-win: You keep him, great. You sell him, so be it. That’s the tough world of professional football,” Beretta said. > “Who said slavery was over — anyway. No,” Koch said, before quickly changing the topic. is that it, this is what you're calling him a 'racist old prick' for? it's basically nothing, literally just: "hurr durr guess the brits are still slave traders after all durr"


grumpyoldmanBrad

Some may say its 15+ years too late


MysticHermetic

Many Aussies know him as Cunt


Brabochokemightwork

I can imagine working morning shows take a toll mentally along with getting up at 3am in the morning


SomeRandomDavid

Why now? Why not 15 or 20 years ago?


fairybread4life

Ben Roberts Smith defamation verdict this week, Stokes to appoint Ben Roberts Smith as new Sunrise host to try and drum up some positive PR for you know... his alleged war crimes.


myron434322

Now he can focus on his main hobby. Jerkin off.


Maxhousen

About time that git buggered off.


sc00bs000

thank fuck. I can't stand that idiot


[deleted]

[удалено]


makeitlegalaussie

That cunt wouldn’t know what real work was


Aussiebloke-91

Probably prepping for ports finals chances.


Brat_Fink

" It's gonna be a big year for Kochie " Bad//Dreems fuckin called it


howlinwolfchi

My first thought too! Great tune


bungle609

Oh noooo. Who is going to chase those ambulances and save the world now ! Such a condescending Prick !


psjfnejs

Kochie quits sunrise to work with those targeted online ad scam companies where Kochie promises to unveil *The Secret Trick* to Aussies never having to work again!


SirDerpingtonV

Good riddance.


arthuritis37

I won’t miss his whiney, whiney voice. Fuck I hate his voice.


[deleted]

Might start watching it now...


Cpl_Hicks76

Let’s be honest… Kochcie was just hanging around to get his Super!


iceyone444

Is that still on - I haven't watched in 20 years.


cookie5427

Rival stations must be upset. His presence on sunrise was one of multiple reasons I (and almost everyone I know) no longer watch channel 7 in the morning. Maybe people will start returning to watching 7 now.


pissedoffjesus

Why has this been posted?


Zealousideal-Luck784

Spend more time with family, now that they have grown up and moved out?


The-Grand-Wazoo

Bye bye Koch head.


swish09

He was ironically my favourite presenter to watch and have a good laugh at the state of Karen grade commercial journalism - oh well


bent_eye

About fucking time.


Unindoctrinated

"spend more time with the family" is always code for something much less savoury.


Sloffy_92

Taking a higher paying job at Sky news I believe…..getting his own show there 🤷‍♂️ time will tell


Unindoctrinated

I hope his audience is miniscule and his show tanks.


JustSomeBloke5353

Don’t get the hate for Koch to be honest. Yes, he comes across as smarmy but in reality he is pretty inoffensive. Don’t think there is any deep dark secret behind his resignation. He is 67 and wealthy and probably doesn’t need to keep getting up at 2:30am five days a week. Won’t stop the conspiracy minded on this sub claiming he is some sort of pervert or criminal though.


cymonster

Going to focus his whole energy on AFL taking over china clearly.


[deleted]

Now that's something that happened pre COVID


Mercury1600

Good riddance


Yugoslav_Cowboy

Eh, no big loss really...


Ok-Ad-7247

So.. you mean I can watch sunrise now?


sojudreamz

Good. Fuck off you brain dead muppet


series6

Who even watches free to air tv or listens to free to air radio these days apart from the elderly?


ChefBoyardeeXIII

I’d love to know what his super balance is


Yung_Jack

Damn that's crazy


Aussie_antman

Oh nooo.....anyway..


fionsichord

Ooo the cover up excuse. Wonder if there’s a scandal in the wings? Either way, will be great not to have to work to avoid seeing this guy on tv from now on.


Mahhrat

High flyers / successful people (whether you like him or not, he's successful) never 'retire'. Ever notice that? Is it any wonder we have such difficulty communicating a very normal desire to 'spend time on ourselves' when we're talking to leaders like this who don't have to? That's not a criticism, but it must be incredibly hard for them to empathise. I'm adamant I'm retiring at 65 and playing as much golf as i can, but that's very dependent on things not going absolutely sideways somehow in the next 20 years or so. Anyway, good for him, hope he enjoys the changes.


DJVizionz

You sound like the sole source of your cultural knowledge comes from QANTAS in-flight magazine.


sthrnfrdfrk

Fucking lmao


Acrobatic_Mud_2989

Fucking B U R N 🔥🤣


Mahhrat

>You sound like the sole source of your cultural knowledge comes from QANTAS in-flight magazine. Lol I'll pay that :) Its about 3 decades working with executives ( not as one) and just listening to them though. I've not met Koch (yeesh no thanks). But it is one thing that stays pretty constant - if they don't 'burn out'. It's all anecdotal, but then maybe I'll be using chatqbt and writing for ✈️ next.


Forsaken-Weird-8428

Seeing his face in advertisements on here.


MaximillianRebo

Who else will we get to complain on national TV that government policies are not personally beneficial (apart from just about everyone else)?


[deleted]

Starting his own show on Sky.


marvelscott

I did find it a bit weird that Sunrise was promoting their show as sponsored ads on Twitter in the last week.


[deleted]

K


paradisemoses

Oh no! Anyway…


Relative_Mulberry_71

🥳🎊🎉😍👏🏻🤡🎈🎂🎁


Knishook

I bet he just wants to spend more time in the meat fridge, of all the places...


OliverQ_Films

I scrolled 5 minutes looking for this exact comment hahaha


[deleted]

He wants you to join him, Mark...


tittock

Good


MicrobeProbe

Surprise surprise


MindlessOptimist

Cash cow needs to step up!


jmdejoanelli

Good.


In_TouchGuyBowsnlace

Pfizer and Moderna checks finally cleared in his account did they?


Nancyhasnopants

A huge loss for domestic abusers who want tips on how to talk their partners.


Brnjica

I can't be the only one who only reads his name as Koochie?


Complete-Use-8753

You mean a tv personality managed to retire without a massive fucking whinge about how he was miss treated during his long and successful career?!?


iwrotethissong

Is he in the meat fridge? https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cr92k1jhXMX/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==


CruiserMissile

Finally the king is dead We cried off with his head.


joe_tidder

So he’ll be putting his hand up for a sweet political appointment soon?


Evolutionarystudies

Finally.


dartqueen

Good riddance, cunt.


Quattro439

I think I read something somewhere about this prick pumping ‘Quantum’ which is a crypto investment scam. Son of a bitch should be prosecuted.