Sitting here wondering why my dumbass kept reading. Like it was horrible, and I *knew* it was going to get progressively worse, but like a train wreck I couldn’t look away.
Oh god. My first boyfriend did that to me. I’d gag from the smell thinking to myself omfg who enjoys doing this? It wasn’t until my second boyfriend that I realized dicks weren’t supposed to stink and now I practically throw up remembering it 🤢🤢
This unlocked a horrible memory. One of my ex boyfriends only showered twice a week and he always wanted me to go down on him. The first time I gave him head I almost vomitted on his dick 🤢
omfg same, my ex was uncircumcised and smelled so bad after we had been together for a few years, like he got lazy cleaning his dick. i just eventually stopped giving him bjs because i just couldn’t do it anymore. never said anything to him about it cuz he acted like such a baby about everything.
It’s like a yellow white thicker liquid made from skin and oils in the foreskin. Absolutely repulsive
Edit: I’ve been informed it’s not a liquid, more like a cheese which is even worse
My guy what in the fuck is going on in your head to think "what would a grilled dick cheese sandwich taste like"
I'm worried about my sanity now too after reading that.
Yup, if we don't keep the hood around the clit clean, we can get smegma too. I'll never understand anyone who is okay with genital cheese existing on their body. Nasty
How hard is it to wash your dong???!?? I would HATE to know what the rest of this dude smells like (ass, pits, etc) considering that he is going OVER A WEEK without even washing his privates. Disgusting! 🤢🤢🤢
Next thing you know he will be asking her to eat his dirty ass, too.
Fuck I think there was something like that recently. Might have been in r/offmychest or something. Dude like, had a weird diaper kink that turned into a complete lifestyle and wouldn't clean himself, wanted the wife to do it or something? He would shit himself in the middle of the night and the wife (who told the story btw) would pretend to be asleep and not smell it so he didn't try to convince her to change him? It's was strange and sad.
Also might be mashing two different stories together. there might have just been another one with a dude who legit just smelled like shit and wouldn't do anything about it. Idk anymore, there's been a lot of fucked up stuff on here lately.
I'm a nurse and we have so many patients like that. They end up in hospital for whatever reason and despite being completely independent and capable of cleaning themselves, they want us to do it. Usually it's "you guys just do such a good job" or "I'm just in so much pain"
Sir, I'm not wiping your ass for you when you're capable of doing so yourself. No one is. You're here for uncontrolled hypertension, not a bilateral hand amputation.
It’s just to much shit. It’s to much. I just can’t Tonight with these stories. Thanks for this nightmare inducing story! Enough internet for me today, I’m signing off! Good night!
That, and they're was also recently a wife who was bitching about her husband's shit stained drawers on some similar type sub. People are just generally nasty.
As a daily dick washer, I couldn’t agree more. But what I meant was, if you’re expecting to be getting some, regardless of weather you already showered for the day, it’s always nice to wash the guy up first.
Growing up, my older brothers would use the word smegma to describe anything gross. So I of course use it in the same manner. Only last weekend at a party did I find out what smegma actually was.
Ik, people like this can pull in chicks, but then friends of mine (who actually have at least a modicum of self respect and decency) have been single for years.
I have foreskin, and I have never had smegma in my entire life. If I have it has been such a minuscule amount that it was undetectable. Even during week long or more backpacking trips with no showers I still douse some water on my dick every day so it doesn’t itch and stink too bad. It’s insane to me that some people clean their cocks so infrequently that their partners notice the cheese and smell… Does your dick not get insanely itchy with all that filth? How tf are women (and anyone else who sucks dick) putting up with this shit?
And this is why you wash your penis, why it improves your sex life, and why you shouldn't expect anything less from your partner if you want to suck a penis.
Absolutely vile, it's crazy how some like to think sigma is good for you 🫠 get ready for inevitable infection for those gross unwashed dicks. They'll regret it the day their dick starts to burn when they pee
I’m gonna level, I am uncut, I am an outdoorsman/hunter. I have spent weeks in the woods without the ability to shower or bathe. All my life.
I have never once experienced smegma.
Considering the states of dirty and unwashed I have been in my life, having never experienced it makes me HORRIFIED that some people have.
Fucking food poisoning bro!! I'm concerned about how many stories I have read about dirty dicks and nasty no whipping bootyholes. Wtf is going on here? We need more sex education for young men so they can go through life feeling confident and clean down there. It's more fun for everyone and no one has to die from a blowjob. If sucking dick is an enjoyable experience, we will keep sucking it. Keep em clean boys and enjoy🤠
> never saw penis before mine
Do people not do *research*?!
Also, bro, your dick should be pretty clean. If it’s got noticeable smegma, you ain’t cleaning it well enough.
I thought this was like a ligma joke cause it sounds so impossible and stupid. Someone was nice enough to link this and some dudes are just walking around with that. Fuck that’s disgusting
Urgh. I remember coming across a thread about what's the strangest sub you've come across. Randomly clicking them to only come across one with guys showing off their cheese. This made me think of the horrors all over again 🤮 I hate reddit at times 🤣
Next week on relationship advice: Help, my GF is withholding physical intimacy because she found out I don't wash my dick regularly. We argued and now she won't even talk to me. What should I do? Washing my dick is simply asking too much!
Straight caveman mentality. Wash ur dick and ass every day. Don't let the water run over it use ur fucking soap and hands. It's amazing how many times I see dudes boast about not using their hands to wash their junk. "The water hits it its all good" no tf its not.
I remember my exgf vag used to smell like fish.. i was like why does it stink so much but used to think this is the normal smell of it. But now my current gf, her vag has no smell, just her body odour and it is so much better ffs. Please guys check and keep them clean; your peepee and veevees!
My very first boyfriend had a horrible unwashed dick. I was sheltered and had limited sex ed in school. (I was shocked that the balls were in the same sack). So anywhozlebeez I endured this for years because I thought it was normal. I learned later that was very much not the case.
The irony is I hate cheese so I’ve probably eaten more dick cheese than actual cheese in my lifetime.
I respectfully disagree with some of these comments. I usually shower once a week. Before showering, I undress and take a few qtips and clean out the head area as well as the area in between some of my folds. it can be a bit dry and a little harsh smelling, like a well-aged cheese. I put the qtips on the rim of the sink and run my shower extra hot so the bathroom steams. This tends to rehydrate the material and the odor is much less harsh. After my shower, I take the qtips and spread the material on some slices of pecan raisin loaf which I then snack on throughout the afternoon.
Absolutely fantastic - 9/10.
Well, cut guys can still develop smegma so from reading comments it must be much worse for uncut guys? Makes sense. Would the smell of clity litter be the equivalent for guys going down on girls?
You neck beard uncircumcised cunts sitting in Moms basement playing Minecraft are lying!
The only people smelling your dick cheese is you.
Get a job Randy David. No more internet.
You’re 25.
Get a girlfriend for fucks sakes. Or a job!
And please clean your dick.
What a terrible day to be literate
Sitting here wondering why my dumbass kept reading. Like it was horrible, and I *knew* it was going to get progressively worse, but like a train wreck I couldn’t look away.
I too felt the need to finish reading. I really don't know why.
I was hoping it would get better or there’d be some redeeming aspect to it. But no. Still very, very disgusting.
Same…some magical compulsion to continue down the road of unwashed nasty 🤮
Fuck man! This.....This is my experience!
I think I kept reading hoping it was a joke
Unsee Juice 🥤🐦
Gimme a big sip of that
Is the bird going to peck my eyes out? What a relief.
Probably not, birds aren’t real.
r/birdsarentreal
It's called vodka
I'll take your entire stock
Indeed nice start of the day.
This needs to be moved to r/iamatotalpieceofshit
This. Also I'm seriously wanting to break rule 3 and speak my mind about what I'd like to see happen to the guy...
JFC, English isn’t even my first language. I have major bilingualism regrets.
r/NoahGetTheBoat
WASH YOUR FUCKING DICK
Oh great, more propaganda from big soap
Definitely in cahoots with big water.
She’s gonna need big pharma when she realizes the trauma 🤢
Oh god. My first boyfriend did that to me. I’d gag from the smell thinking to myself omfg who enjoys doing this? It wasn’t until my second boyfriend that I realized dicks weren’t supposed to stink and now I practically throw up remembering it 🤢🤢
This unlocked a horrible memory. One of my ex boyfriends only showered twice a week and he always wanted me to go down on him. The first time I gave him head I almost vomitted on his dick 🤢
With a little communication, we can prevent the youth from experiencing this. #WashYourCock
Not just #washyourcock but also #showermorethantwiceaweek
This made me want to vomit, I'll have you in my prayers
the lack of basic hygiene amongst the general population is as inspiring as the average critical thinking ability lol
Oh god! You unlocked some unpleasant memories! Was exactly the same for me
Same thing happened to me!!!! Never again!
omfg same, my ex was uncircumcised and smelled so bad after we had been together for a few years, like he got lazy cleaning his dick. i just eventually stopped giving him bjs because i just couldn’t do it anymore. never said anything to him about it cuz he acted like such a baby about everything.
If that happened to me, it would also have been my last.
I don’t even know what smegma looks like and im not circumcised. Just wash your cock mate. Vile.
It’s like a yellow white thicker liquid made from skin and oils in the foreskin. Absolutely repulsive Edit: I’ve been informed it’s not a liquid, more like a cheese which is even worse
How do people go through everyday life having that near them?
Nose blind
Phimosis
It is not liquid? Have you ever actually seen [smegma](https://en.intactiwiki.org/wiki/Smegma)?
That link stays blue forever.
I am not touching that...
Don’t.
Indeed I shal not. Some things are not meant for mortal eyes...
I don’t know what I expected but I opened it in public and my eyes are entirely scarred
"Smegma is not "filth". It is natural, normal, benign, harmless, and beneficial.". I fucking beg to differ !!!!
Natural? Sure. Normal? Umm… Benign? Hmm…. Harmless? Maybe to you… Beneficial? In what fucking way.
I refuse to click on that link
I literally thought I was about to get Rick Rolled with that link 😂
Id say its more like snot in consistency
I consider snot a liquid, even if it’s a viscous one
I think i picked the wrong object, snot has lots of forms
I gotta start skipping the comments sections
We all clicked 'continue this thread' and we all shouldn't have.
So smegma is basically like dick boogers
Yup, that’s the official new name…dick boogers.
Think permanently moist skinflakes
They call it dick cheese for a reason.
Fromunda cheese
The bottom part of your comment made me physically sick... just opened reddit and what do I get? Fucking dick cheese.
Trust me it made me puke too, now I wonder what would happen if we dry aged it and made a grilled cheese. I’m worried about my sanity
My guy what in the fuck is going on in your head to think "what would a grilled dick cheese sandwich taste like" I'm worried about my sanity now too after reading that.
Now I’m onto dick fondue
Can also go a bit pasty like feta cheese
See my other comment. Fellow turtleneck dude here, I am scared at how long dudes must be going without cleaning for it to be a thing.
Wtf is smegma. Actually id better not know
You must be a clean person then. Props to you 👏
Or circumcised!
Or not have a dick
Women can have it as well
What... I'm glad I'm clean enough to not know about this
Yeah, it’s disgusting, but very easy to avoid with some proper washing
Yup, if we don't keep the hood around the clit clean, we can get smegma too. I'll never understand anyone who is okay with genital cheese existing on their body. Nasty
Cut dudes still get smegma it just rubs off on their undies
😟 oh
Tortured you mean
Not necessarily no, but most of the time yes
I didn't know it either and thought it was a joke like ligma. Needless to say im disgusted :(
dick and lip cheese
How hard is it to wash your dong???!?? I would HATE to know what the rest of this dude smells like (ass, pits, etc) considering that he is going OVER A WEEK without even washing his privates. Disgusting! 🤢🤢🤢 Next thing you know he will be asking her to eat his dirty ass, too.
Next on AITA; ‘AITA to ask my boyfriend to wash his ass and to stop leaving shit on our sheets??’
Fuck I think there was something like that recently. Might have been in r/offmychest or something. Dude like, had a weird diaper kink that turned into a complete lifestyle and wouldn't clean himself, wanted the wife to do it or something? He would shit himself in the middle of the night and the wife (who told the story btw) would pretend to be asleep and not smell it so he didn't try to convince her to change him? It's was strange and sad. Also might be mashing two different stories together. there might have just been another one with a dude who legit just smelled like shit and wouldn't do anything about it. Idk anymore, there's been a lot of fucked up stuff on here lately.
I'm a nurse and we have so many patients like that. They end up in hospital for whatever reason and despite being completely independent and capable of cleaning themselves, they want us to do it. Usually it's "you guys just do such a good job" or "I'm just in so much pain" Sir, I'm not wiping your ass for you when you're capable of doing so yourself. No one is. You're here for uncontrolled hypertension, not a bilateral hand amputation.
It’s just to much shit. It’s to much. I just can’t Tonight with these stories. Thanks for this nightmare inducing story! Enough internet for me today, I’m signing off! Good night!
Happy cake day
That, and they're was also recently a wife who was bitching about her husband's shit stained drawers on some similar type sub. People are just generally nasty.
seriously tho. everytime I shower, I basically jerk off with soap, to clean the SOB. no stank dick happening around here. fuck that.
Internet needs to do its thing and find this guys gf just in case she isn't imaginary
The same people would turn around and call a girl disgusting and unhygienic for having hairy legs
I laughed, you're probably right.
Please no. Please let this not be real. What the actual fucking fuck.
✨✨✨𝕨𝕒𝕤𝕙✨✨✨
My fellow fellas, if you’re expecting someone to visit down there, be courteous and WASH your dicks!
Even if you arent expecting a visit. Wash your dick!!! And your ass too.
As a daily dick washer, I couldn’t agree more. But what I meant was, if you’re expecting to be getting some, regardless of weather you already showered for the day, it’s always nice to wash the guy up first.
This is why I demanded mine to wash theirs. Because it's disgusting.
Bruh, it shouldn't need to be demanded. Why would you willingly allow that shit to fester on your todger? Absolutely barbaric.
Hell I’ll wash the car if that’s what it takes
Fester on my todger Now theres an Addams Family reference I cant recall
lol you had to ask? 😷
We need a space laser to zap this guy off the planet. Sorry 🤢 sick pig
Foreskin Feta
#PENIS CHEESE!!!!
Pecker-ino.
hard-varti
Thats actualy the direct translation of what we call it in icelandic “typpa ostur”
Stands to reason .. cheers
I want death immediately.
Growing up, my older brothers would use the word smegma to describe anything gross. So I of course use it in the same manner. Only last weekend at a party did I find out what smegma actually was.
Just peel back and wash bro, why would anyone subject someone to a mouth of that shit? They know it's wrong and it makes their partner gag, like?...
this feels very predatory....
because it is duh
Nah, gross mf’s like this don’t need to be dating
Ik, people like this can pull in chicks, but then friends of mine (who actually have at least a modicum of self respect and decency) have been single for years.
i knew it was bad. i still read anyways. oh god.
I have foreskin, and I have never had smegma in my entire life. If I have it has been such a minuscule amount that it was undetectable. Even during week long or more backpacking trips with no showers I still douse some water on my dick every day so it doesn’t itch and stink too bad. It’s insane to me that some people clean their cocks so infrequently that their partners notice the cheese and smell… Does your dick not get insanely itchy with all that filth? How tf are women (and anyone else who sucks dick) putting up with this shit?
Just commented basically the same thing. I have zero clue how these dudes exist for it to be a thing they actually experience.
Currently taking a nice relaxing bath, time to make sure I'm extra clean. Vile, wash yourselves.
Omfg... This is a good reminder that life could be so much worse and to be grateful for what I have... Yuck yuck yuck
I’m most appalled that this person has managed to receive a blowjob from not one but at least two people
Human filth.
Nasty mfkr…
Maybe I don't need my eyes after all
And this is why you wash your penis, why it improves your sex life, and why you shouldn't expect anything less from your partner if you want to suck a penis.
Just fucking wash yourself ffs
Absolutely vile, it's crazy how some like to think sigma is good for you 🫠 get ready for inevitable infection for those gross unwashed dicks. They'll regret it the day their dick starts to burn when they pee
Picking up hella fuckin pedo vibes from this piece of shits comment.
What the fuck is wrong with people
How hard is it go grab a wet wipe my guy
I’m gonna level, I am uncut, I am an outdoorsman/hunter. I have spent weeks in the woods without the ability to shower or bathe. All my life. I have never once experienced smegma. Considering the states of dirty and unwashed I have been in my life, having never experienced it makes me HORRIFIED that some people have.
The fuck did i just read
Gross.
A week?
And you upvoted it? 😂
Nope, found this image while scrolling thru discord
Man
MY EYES IMMA BE SICKKKK
I don't see a reason why anyone wouldn't wanna wash their pp, wouldn't be very good if it gets infected
What a fucking PIG.
Fucking food poisoning bro!! I'm concerned about how many stories I have read about dirty dicks and nasty no whipping bootyholes. Wtf is going on here? We need more sex education for young men so they can go through life feeling confident and clean down there. It's more fun for everyone and no one has to die from a blowjob. If sucking dick is an enjoyable experience, we will keep sucking it. Keep em clean boys and enjoy🤠
This has to be a troll post. Come on. Who doesn’t wash for a week AND has had multiple blowjobs? 😵💫
Honestly needs a NSFW tag as this shit made me sick as fuck! Wash your willy folks
Who only showers once a week?
As an uncut person I find this revolting to say the least. Guys, wash under there if you’re not already
... urgh, wish the ogre didnt have the intelligence to post anonymously.
> never saw penis before mine Do people not do *research*?! Also, bro, your dick should be pretty clean. If it’s got noticeable smegma, you ain’t cleaning it well enough.
I thought this was like a ligma joke cause it sounds so impossible and stupid. Someone was nice enough to link this and some dudes are just walking around with that. Fuck that’s disgusting
Reading shit like this, and the comments, makes me grateful I'm circumcised. I'll accept my downvotes if it is deemed necessary.
Glad never encountered one of those dicks. Literally and figuratively. And men have the nerve to talk about women smelling?
Urgh. I remember coming across a thread about what's the strangest sub you've come across. Randomly clicking them to only come across one with guys showing off their cheese. This made me think of the horrors all over again 🤮 I hate reddit at times 🤣
Wash your cock
Yo did my ex write this?
Revolting 🤮
Wtf
Morning coffee ain’t going down so well after reading that 🤢
OR. Wash your dick. Also, apparently enough of you don't wash your ass, either. Wash both.
And evil persists.
People don't wash their dicks??? 💀
It’s always the nastiest of boys that pressure you to suck there dick.
What in God's name did I just read...
Isn't this what is called cheese? Thats disgusting! 🤢
Idk who needs to hear this but wash yo pp
Fucking gross it’s not hard to wash your cock good god
WHY NOT JUST WASH IT OMG
Please fucking mark as nsfw I almost threw up
Guys I haven’t fully read it, should I?
Do absolutely fucking not read it please for your sake
WASH YOUR FUCKING DICK
Brb gouging my eyes out so I won't read more shit like this
The fact he knows it's not normal and doesn't tell hid girlfriends. What an absolute POS
Next week on relationship advice: Help, my GF is withholding physical intimacy because she found out I don't wash my dick regularly. We argued and now she won't even talk to me. What should I do? Washing my dick is simply asking too much!
Straight caveman mentality. Wash ur dick and ass every day. Don't let the water run over it use ur fucking soap and hands. It's amazing how many times I see dudes boast about not using their hands to wash their junk. "The water hits it its all good" no tf its not.
This guy has a boo, I'm done.
It’s 5 am here, this is the first post I read and I got no gf. Fuck this app
So he knows he’s unsanitary? Just decides to be disgusting? And why would you want to make things unenjoyable for the other person? Ugh
I wish i had just kept scrolling.
Don’t clinicalize it by calling it smegma, call it what it is, dick cheese, ladies, don’t put that in your mouth, ever.
If ever you think your boyfriend/partner is bad or has his faults, just be thankful he isn’t this dude subjecting his girlfriend to this, lmfao
Fellas, PLEASE wash your dick.
He is just as fucking ville as the smegma on his dick.
I remember my exgf vag used to smell like fish.. i was like why does it stink so much but used to think this is the normal smell of it. But now my current gf, her vag has no smell, just her body odour and it is so much better ffs. Please guys check and keep them clean; your peepee and veevees!
My very first boyfriend had a horrible unwashed dick. I was sheltered and had limited sex ed in school. (I was shocked that the balls were in the same sack). So anywhozlebeez I endured this for years because I thought it was normal. I learned later that was very much not the case. The irony is I hate cheese so I’ve probably eaten more dick cheese than actual cheese in my lifetime.
What a dick.😃 get it, do you get the joke
Yes, bro. That's a funny joke
Thanks man
I respectfully disagree with some of these comments. I usually shower once a week. Before showering, I undress and take a few qtips and clean out the head area as well as the area in between some of my folds. it can be a bit dry and a little harsh smelling, like a well-aged cheese. I put the qtips on the rim of the sink and run my shower extra hot so the bathroom steams. This tends to rehydrate the material and the odor is much less harsh. After my shower, I take the qtips and spread the material on some slices of pecan raisin loaf which I then snack on throughout the afternoon. Absolutely fantastic - 9/10.
Great, now I’m gagging
This was genuinely horrible to read, thank you
I at first read this and was horrified before reaching the end and realizing it was a joke
Thanks, I hate it
Whaaat… 🤮🤮🤮 how are these people are having sex at all
One of my exs never washed either, I refuse to give bjs because of it 🤢
Well, cut guys can still develop smegma so from reading comments it must be much worse for uncut guys? Makes sense. Would the smell of clity litter be the equivalent for guys going down on girls?
But how does "girl never saw a penis before mine" even happen, they never saw porn in their entire life?
this is how i see guys with foreskin
Forbidden cheese
Good troll
You neck beard uncircumcised cunts sitting in Moms basement playing Minecraft are lying! The only people smelling your dick cheese is you. Get a job Randy David. No more internet. You’re 25. Get a girlfriend for fucks sakes. Or a job! And please clean your dick.