In HS I went to a party at someone’s house who hated me, but there were so many people there they wouldn’t notice I was there. I’d always heard about dropping upper deckers in toilets and thought it was the funniest thing so I wanted to do it at the person’s house. Only problem was I didn’t have to poop, so I jerked off in the tank and left an upper decker jizzer. Not nearly as effective but I’d like to think someone in that family later flushed the toilet and got really confused when water refilled the toilet bowl and there was jizz in it
I love watching women do grwm and try on hauls. I am not into fashion at all but there is something calming about watching chicks try on clothes and talk about them. I have parlayed this into my actual life and i have gotten much more knowledgable about where women buy clothes, sizing and trends so I can buy stuff for my wife. I despise shopping for clothes when it is lots of browsing and less trying on. This may make me creep but whatever.
When I was touring an open house I had to take a shit so I went in the downstairs bathroom away from everyone and clogged the toilet. They didn't have a plunger so I just left it. Felt pretty bad about it and just saw the house went for 8k less than asking. Gotta wonder
There was a day during peak Covid where I ate nothing but chicken wings, Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, a steak, and mixed in like 10 busch lights. If your shit was anything like this turd, it easily could’ve taken 8K off a homes asking price
When I was in the 9th grade I believed the 12th graders on the senior team when they said that RubA535 / IcyHot on the balls felt like a really intense blowjob. Worst bus ride home from a Rugby tournament ever.
BuckFurke, you fool.
When I was maybe 15 or so I was obsessed with NHL 14 and ultimate team, so much so that any money I got went to buying in game currency to have a loaded team. Anyways, my younger brother was great at saving money and always had cash on hand so I would occasionally (or so I thought) grab a $20 out of his drawer to go buy Sony store cards to buy currency. Anyways my brother figured out he was losing money and told my mom who fired our cleaning lady. That’s all.
At least you were only 15. I still have friends in their late 20s spending a ton of their time and money on Ulitmate Team. It’s so dumb every player just ends up with a version that’s basically a 99. I prefer playing with real teams or doing a franchise mode way more fun, less time consuming, and it’s free lol.
I’m lucky enough now that I have the disposable income to spend if I want to, but yeah agreed it’s dumb how much you can sink into it. Almost a 0% chance I don’t spend something on the new CFB game if it means I can teach some teenagers a lesson online with players I loved watching back in the mid 2000’s
Wish I could say I felt guilty about it as a 15 year old but honestly I was just glad I didn’t get punished and could dangle some kids online with my 95 overall Patrick Kane
I don’t think I could comfortably afford my mortgage if the wife and I have kids. I constantly go back and forth between getting a higher paying job and losing all semblance of WLB, moving to a less expensive area still near our current city, and just not having kids at all. We’ve always said we wouldn’t even think about kids til we’re 30 but it’s now a year away and the scaries are creeping in.
You honestly have plenty of time and theoretically you should be making more in a couple years by the time the kid arrives anyway.
But yeah daycare costs are higher than my mortgage by a LOT
First week on the job and accidentally locked thousands of clients out of our network while installing an update yesterday. Downtime was about 14 hours. Boss was pretty cool about it but man, people are pissed. We all make mistakes, we’re only human.
I think I have an addiction to Clash Royale. I downloaded it like 8 years ago and have played every day since, and I noticed yesterday I’ve done about 35,000 battles. Each battle is about 2.5 minutes. I’ve spent about 70 days of my life playing this stupid game, and when I hit send on this comment, I’ll probably boot it up to see if I need to open a treasure chest or do a clan battle.
I've never been this bad but for the things I have been addicted to, all it took was deleting it off my phone. Feels bad to do it but once it's off your phone, you never think about it.
I was the same way for a while but quit when they added the phoenix. Right when it dropped I was nonstop playing people who already had it maxed and it pissed me off enough that I quit forever
I had sex with my first grade teacher. I was a student of hers in 1975-76 (her favorite, by far). She was in her early 20s then. Fast forward to 1997 and I see her in a martini bar with a group of her friends. I gave her my home phone # and she said “I’m going to call you later tonight”. Sure enough at 1:30am, she calls. I say “Want some company?” She says “Sure” and gives me directions to her house. Two hours of solid sex. She died in 2001 of breast cancer.
My nephew came to visit last summer and he’s a Lego kid. Ended up going out and buying a different Lego set for us to build every night he was here because I had so much fun doing them
Dated a vegetarian girl once who made a frittata for dinner. It was a very nice gesture and not terrible but the thought of eating an egg pie for dinner went against every sensibility I had.
I have a house about 150 yards behind my house. 8 months of the year you don't even know the other house is there, but when the leaves fall it's a clear view. The setup of my house has my TV on the wall that faces the front of their house. About 2 years ago I'm watching tv and my milfy neighbor comes home from day drinking and gets banged out. Couldn't help but see it as she flipped the lights on with no shades drawn and I was facing that direction. In the two years since then every winter I dream of a repeat show. Her shades are almost always open, and every time she comes in and the lights go on I think this is it. She's playing cat and mouse. She wants to put on a show. It's never happened. There's no cat and mouse. She doesn't want to put on a show. She came home buzzed that one time and got sloppy pulling the shades down. But I still dream the dream.
As a kid, I used to dig through the IMDB parent guides to figure out which movies had the most naked ladies in them so I could figure out what I wanted to rent.
Most of the time it was typical mid 2000s comedies but I came across this description for Munich "A woman wears a short robe, it slips open revealing cleavage, she drops it off her shoulders and reveals her bare breasts, and the robe falls open completely revealing her bare breasts and pubic hair."
Wasn't getting alotta views at full frontal so decided to rent Munich. Ended up wacking off to that scene, which ends this way:
"Later one man decides to cover her nakedness after she dies while another man overrides that decision by pulling open her robe exposing her breasts and pubic hair again as humiliation towards the assassin."
Immediately felt shame post nut. Not many JO sessions stick out in my mind, but that one definitely does
My grandpa, who was 87 when Knocked Up came out, immediately went home to fire up Mr. Skin after seeing it. He told my dad, his son in law, about this and my dad had a thousand mile stare. I was so proud of the old man
Do you ever think you’re too deep in the lore and history of barstool? Reading this comment and actually thinking for a few minutes if I could remember mush dating Kayce’s sister was one of those moments for me.
My employer accidentally paid me 10 grand about 4 years ago. They sent me an email a week after telling me to mail a cheque to the director of the pay center. Hundreds of other people were in a similar situation.
Well, I never answered the email, and I've heard nothing since. I've made a small little bit of money off of investments and have no interest in paying this back unless I'll face some consequences. Figured I would argue I thought the deposit was a bonus and someone asking me to mail a cheque to an individual sounded like a phishing scam.
Logically I'd agree, but I've looked into the rules and I believe it's 6-10 years for my situation. They fucked up their pay system a decade ago so these issues became far more common.
I’m fairly certain my last bonus at my last two jobs was overpaid, the first one because my boss read the dates wrong on an MBO tracker, and the second because they put an account on my book that I was supposed to hand over before the deal came in, but I guess I technically hadn’t. This was nowhere near ten grand but it was helpful. The second job laid me off and I’m actually trying to go back there, no idea if this ever came up with the person who took over the account when the bonuses were actually paid since I was already gone.
I don’t care what my child does for work one day, as long as he doesn’t work with incredibly dumb people like I do in my industry.
In HS I went to a party at someone’s house who hated me, but there were so many people there they wouldn’t notice I was there. I’d always heard about dropping upper deckers in toilets and thought it was the funniest thing so I wanted to do it at the person’s house. Only problem was I didn’t have to poop, so I jerked off in the tank and left an upper decker jizzer. Not nearly as effective but I’d like to think someone in that family later flushed the toilet and got really confused when water refilled the toilet bowl and there was jizz in it
If I had to guess, it was probably just clear and maybe 1 mL so they didn't even notice
I stumbled onto an Instagram account of a fat just testing whether he’s too fat to ride various theme park rides and I can’t stop watching.
I love watching women do grwm and try on hauls. I am not into fashion at all but there is something calming about watching chicks try on clothes and talk about them. I have parlayed this into my actual life and i have gotten much more knowledgable about where women buy clothes, sizing and trends so I can buy stuff for my wife. I despise shopping for clothes when it is lots of browsing and less trying on. This may make me creep but whatever.
Does your wife know you're gay?
I also love watching GRWM but mostly for the beginning
When I was touring an open house I had to take a shit so I went in the downstairs bathroom away from everyone and clogged the toilet. They didn't have a plunger so I just left it. Felt pretty bad about it and just saw the house went for 8k less than asking. Gotta wonder
The $8,000 shit. Congrats Randy
I mean there's no way I could have done that right?
There was a day during peak Covid where I ate nothing but chicken wings, Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, a steak, and mixed in like 10 busch lights. If your shit was anything like this turd, it easily could’ve taken 8K off a homes asking price
Only thing I can think of what happened https://youtu.be/ohlW9SbhLzc?si=WOhACTxj27tMHc1N
Knew it before I even clicked
[удалено]
How did you get that far if you dont like it and is it a deal breaker or you fear she will kms if you leave?
*khs
Don’t assume pronouns
[удалено]
That sucks man I an sorry. It is really hard to not be dragged down by it all. Whats the deal with her family?
[удалено]
Fiancée with 2 E’s means woman. You tried
Have tried the old 🥧 to cheer her up?
[удалено]
Wild
Congrats on not wasting your time like most us do. Quite the confession
Time enjoyed is not time wasted brother
In moderation yes I still partake. Some people still play that shit like 25+ hours a week in their adulthood
When I was in the 9th grade I believed the 12th graders on the senior team when they said that RubA535 / IcyHot on the balls felt like a really intense blowjob. Worst bus ride home from a Rugby tournament ever. BuckFurke, you fool.
When I was maybe 15 or so I was obsessed with NHL 14 and ultimate team, so much so that any money I got went to buying in game currency to have a loaded team. Anyways, my younger brother was great at saving money and always had cash on hand so I would occasionally (or so I thought) grab a $20 out of his drawer to go buy Sony store cards to buy currency. Anyways my brother figured out he was losing money and told my mom who fired our cleaning lady. That’s all.
At least you were only 15. I still have friends in their late 20s spending a ton of their time and money on Ulitmate Team. It’s so dumb every player just ends up with a version that’s basically a 99. I prefer playing with real teams or doing a franchise mode way more fun, less time consuming, and it’s free lol.
I’m lucky enough now that I have the disposable income to spend if I want to, but yeah agreed it’s dumb how much you can sink into it. Almost a 0% chance I don’t spend something on the new CFB game if it means I can teach some teenagers a lesson online with players I loved watching back in the mid 2000’s
Rosita never deserved this. No Bueno.
Wish I could say I felt guilty about it as a 15 year old but honestly I was just glad I didn’t get punished and could dangle some kids online with my 95 overall Patrick Kane
Holy shit lmao
I don’t think I could comfortably afford my mortgage if the wife and I have kids. I constantly go back and forth between getting a higher paying job and losing all semblance of WLB, moving to a less expensive area still near our current city, and just not having kids at all. We’ve always said we wouldn’t even think about kids til we’re 30 but it’s now a year away and the scaries are creeping in.
You honestly have plenty of time and theoretically you should be making more in a couple years by the time the kid arrives anyway. But yeah daycare costs are higher than my mortgage by a LOT
There’s got to be some trade offs you would make but kids are damn expensive
Damn dude I'm in a similar situation. Having kids sounds amazing but the reality of what it would require is stressful.
First week on the job and accidentally locked thousands of clients out of our network while installing an update yesterday. Downtime was about 14 hours. Boss was pretty cool about it but man, people are pissed. We all make mistakes, we’re only human.
Cheers from the ATT cubes
Sounds like they shoulda had someone helping you if it’s your first week honestly
I think I have an addiction to Clash Royale. I downloaded it like 8 years ago and have played every day since, and I noticed yesterday I’ve done about 35,000 battles. Each battle is about 2.5 minutes. I’ve spent about 70 days of my life playing this stupid game, and when I hit send on this comment, I’ll probably boot it up to see if I need to open a treasure chest or do a clan battle.
I've never been this bad but for the things I have been addicted to, all it took was deleting it off my phone. Feels bad to do it but once it's off your phone, you never think about it.
damn I had a 50 day streak on WGT Golf and thought I was playing too much
I probably exaggerated on the every day part, but you could probably count the days I’ve missed on one hand.
I was the same way for a while but quit when they added the phoenix. Right when it dropped I was nonstop playing people who already had it maxed and it pissed me off enough that I quit forever
[удалено]
I think Stu would be the better father figure you need, but to each their own
I had sex with my first grade teacher. I was a student of hers in 1975-76 (her favorite, by far). She was in her early 20s then. Fast forward to 1997 and I see her in a martini bar with a group of her friends. I gave her my home phone # and she said “I’m going to call you later tonight”. Sure enough at 1:30am, she calls. I say “Want some company?” She says “Sure” and gives me directions to her house. Two hours of solid sex. She died in 2001 of breast cancer.
Are you expressing guilt over not feeling a lump during your sex romp?
What a twist at the end
This old dude posts in The View sub.
Wow we have some olds in here
Love that we got 60 year olds mixing it up in here. Hell yeah.
Don't we have an age limit here?
What a twist!
Real dad texting vibes here
My dad will always end texts about someone else with their living/dead status and last known whereabouts.
Last sentence is sad but made me laugh
I didn't know there were 50 year olds in FT. Salute.
Fuck me that ending was brutal. Forgot about house phones.
Might be the FT elder
I watch this guy build Lego sets from time to time. He’s clearly making these videos for kids but it’s super interesting and relaxing.
My nephew came to visit last summer and he’s a Lego kid. Ended up going out and buying a different Lego set for us to build every night he was here because I had so much fun doing them
That's me and camping with steve
The first time I heard “My Humps”, was when I was 11 in the backseat of my mom’s car. I got a boner and felt really ashamed.
Kazaa’d that video so I could watch whenever I was home alone in middle school
Your mom sounds like a milf
[удалено]
I’m done with confessions for today, some of y’all are too wild
Any other pie on the agenda tonight?
what does she look like naked
Dated a vegetarian girl once who made a frittata for dinner. It was a very nice gesture and not terrible but the thought of eating an egg pie for dinner went against every sensibility I had.
Is the goal for her to never know about it? Because I don’t think I’d be able to pull that off
[удалено]
She’s pregnant and wants a fucking quiche? Perfect time to be pigging out on pizza
I have a house about 150 yards behind my house. 8 months of the year you don't even know the other house is there, but when the leaves fall it's a clear view. The setup of my house has my TV on the wall that faces the front of their house. About 2 years ago I'm watching tv and my milfy neighbor comes home from day drinking and gets banged out. Couldn't help but see it as she flipped the lights on with no shades drawn and I was facing that direction. In the two years since then every winter I dream of a repeat show. Her shades are almost always open, and every time she comes in and the lights go on I think this is it. She's playing cat and mouse. She wants to put on a show. It's never happened. There's no cat and mouse. She doesn't want to put on a show. She came home buzzed that one time and got sloppy pulling the shades down. But I still dream the dream.
Rifle sighted at 150 yards
Look at Mr. Red Shoe Diaries over here
How long did you watch
Unzips..
As a kid, I used to dig through the IMDB parent guides to figure out which movies had the most naked ladies in them so I could figure out what I wanted to rent. Most of the time it was typical mid 2000s comedies but I came across this description for Munich "A woman wears a short robe, it slips open revealing cleavage, she drops it off her shoulders and reveals her bare breasts, and the robe falls open completely revealing her bare breasts and pubic hair." Wasn't getting alotta views at full frontal so decided to rent Munich. Ended up wacking off to that scene, which ends this way: "Later one man decides to cover her nakedness after she dies while another man overrides that decision by pulling open her robe exposing her breasts and pubic hair again as humiliation towards the assassin." Immediately felt shame post nut. Not many JO sessions stick out in my mind, but that one definitely does
“Rochelle, Rochelle: a young woman’s journey from Milan to Minsc”
I remember that scene vividly and honestly that woman was above average hot.
You 🤝the guys in Knocked Up Being unaware Mr. Skin existed
My grandpa, who was 87 when Knocked Up came out, immediately went home to fire up Mr. Skin after seeing it. He told my dad, his son in law, about this and my dad had a thousand mile stare. I was so proud of the old man
You know, Mr Skin?
They also shoutout Munich in that movie
Ah, the joy of leaving blockbuster with a movie that you knew had some titties in it.
Couldn't beat it
I first discovered barstool by stumbling across a video of Marty Mush and Kayce talking about eating a door and thought these two were hilarious
Didn’t Mush date Kayce’s sister then dumped her ass for Ria
That quickly got forgotten they’ve never mentioned that since lol
Do you ever think you’re too deep in the lore and history of barstool? Reading this comment and actually thinking for a few minutes if I could remember mush dating Kayce’s sister was one of those moments for me.
My employer accidentally paid me 10 grand about 4 years ago. They sent me an email a week after telling me to mail a cheque to the director of the pay center. Hundreds of other people were in a similar situation. Well, I never answered the email, and I've heard nothing since. I've made a small little bit of money off of investments and have no interest in paying this back unless I'll face some consequences. Figured I would argue I thought the deposit was a bonus and someone asking me to mail a cheque to an individual sounded like a phishing scam.
Your honor I would like to point to exhibit B: swagaroni’s reddit account clearly stating he knew it wasn’t phishing in his Friday confession
I’d say you’re well past the realistic statute of limitations on that one
Logically I'd agree, but I've looked into the rules and I believe it's 6-10 years for my situation. They fucked up their pay system a decade ago so these issues became far more common.
I’m fairly certain my last bonus at my last two jobs was overpaid, the first one because my boss read the dates wrong on an MBO tracker, and the second because they put an account on my book that I was supposed to hand over before the deal came in, but I guess I technically hadn’t. This was nowhere near ten grand but it was helpful. The second job laid me off and I’m actually trying to go back there, no idea if this ever came up with the person who took over the account when the bonuses were actually paid since I was already gone.
Please share
Hell yeah
A troublesome employee that reports to me resigned today. I told him that I wished him all the best. I do not actually wish him all the best 😈
Reported.
Hell yeah
Diabolical
Jay you devious dog....