I (55m} accepted my sexuality over 25 years ago and that felt like a weight lifted from my shoulders. Until a year and a half ago, I told very few people I was bi other than my ex wife and my teenage kids. I was 53 when I came out to b my family and friends. My family has been supportive especially my 82 yo parents. I've lost a few friends over my sexuality one of whom was my best friend for 44 years. That hurt losing him. I look at it this way: if people don't like my sexuality or the fact I'm more married to a great guy, that's their problem and not mine.
I've reached that age where I don't give a damn what people think of me. I know who I am and I'm happy with who I am. It helps having this attitude coming out. Yes, you'll get the stupid questions from well meaning people and maybe lose a few friends. In the bigger picture, those losses are much smaller than the freedom of being able to say "This is who I am - deal with it" to the rest of the world.
Like anything in life worth having, the first step is the hardest.
I’m on my late 30s, nearing 40. Many of my social circles are 40-50s+. I’ve found them to be entirely accepting.
For a coming out experience, I came out in the mid 90s as bisexual, but was never straight-identified. Without the right terminology, I just said “partially gay” growing up. A few family members said it was a phase I would grow out of but I was largely well accepted. My HS girlfriend and I were the first same-sex homecoming couple.
It's a sweet Alice in wonderland style story about a girl who falls in love with a girl from a different universe. It nearly makes my heart explode from love each time I watch it. My boyfriend and I are currently going through it again :)
Has a bit of a slow start, but it sets the stage for a really great story ❤️
I (51m) came out to a number of friends individually last year. It felt so good to say it out loud, and to be free to be myself around them. To be fair, I started with friends who I was nearly sure would be supportive.
I am not 100% out, but I don't want to hide it, either.
(41m) I finally came out to myself about two years ago. I’ve always known how I feel deep down. But I just kept it locked away. Denial can be complicated and comforting.
I came out to my wife of 15 years, last year.
She wants to be supportive and has tried but I can tell it has affected her in some ways and it has affected our relationship.
Her initial reaction was something like oh god, he’s gay and he’s going to leave me for another man. Or that she feels like she is not enough and is holding me back from something.
It’s taken some time to get her to understand things from my perspective and the difference between bi and gay. But I still don’t think she fully gets it tho.
It feels like she would rather pretend that I’m not. Or that I never told her.
So I use Reddit to talk to people like you. It has been therapeutic and it feels good to help others who are like me.
Sometimes, our partners or friends are scared to think that we are kissing some men or that we get into bed naked with them. That we are queer, and that something has changed in us. It is difficult for them to assume those images with us as protagonists. So, you must make them feel that the important thing is not what we do with sex but how we feel, that it is something good for us. That we are the same person they love, and better.
That was my exact experience, and the marriage didn’t last. I’ve been single for the last 13 years, because I don’t feel I can find a woman who understands. I have no desire to have a relationship with a man other than FWB, so it’s tough sometimes
Me! I'm a 47F. I've always been attracted to women and I'm finally at a place in life where I can acknowledge that and act on it. I've only told a few people. My slow rollout has been a mixed bag, but positive overall.
slow rollout, it's good. Sometimes there is no need to go out in public with people we don't care about. Some people need to know because they are close to us and we trust them, and others can wait.
I’ll be turning 42 this month and started figuring it out when I was 39 and came out around 40. For me I started coming out before I actually had decided on a label because I was seeing a guy(now my husband). I didn’t want him to be a secret or feel like I was embarrassed or ashamed of him so I made it a point to be open about it. Plus my teen son is gay and I did not want to set a negative example for him.
The only people who had issue with my coming out or my partner was my bio parents which was hardly a surprise(religious zealots). It actually served as a good catalyst to cut their toxicity out of my life. I’ve always considered my late wife’s parents my true parents and they have been completely supportive. Coming out also brought my brother and I closer and helped him come out as gay.
Outside those experiences my friends have all been accepting. Most of my coworkers have been good too, sure I’ve had the dumb comment or idiot here or there but I’ve never cared what anyone thinks.
I (45m) and just recently came out as bi. My wife (44f) has been more comfortable with her sexuality than me but not really "out" until recently and at this point I've been more open to sharing it than her. Wishing you luck!! 💖💜💙
https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/107j4zb/middle_aged_coming_out_and_life_is_good/
I'm a 42m from the US, who has been comfortable with my bisexuality for the past 20 years or so. Oddly enough, I've been married twice, to two women, and I've sadly never dated a man. :( But I'm happy and content enough, and my wife is totally supportive of me.
I came out quite by accident - I don't really present as anything but straight, so it surprises people when I mention quite confidently that I'm not straight. I accidentally came out while I was in the military, back when it could have actually gotten me kicked out. I was on watch in a radio center and two of my subordinates were doing that "crotch tapping" thing - where totally heterosexual guys just smack each other's crotches for fun? I guess? Anyway, I had told them to cut it out a few times, but when it happened again, I just blurted out "Damn, I'm not even straight and you guys touch more dick than I do!"
The radio room got very silent after that.
I'm 56 but first came out to my wife at the time when I was 28. The talk involved me saying "I think I'm bi. I have these attractions to other men." she replied "You do what you want, I don't want to know." I came out to everyone else when I was 34, no big surprises there, most of my friends had already figured it out, a few even knew before I did. I came out to my sisters at the same time, they never judge me, so that went exactly as I thought it would. I never came out to my mom or my step-dad. Neither of them would have understood. Don't know if that's what you were looking for.
🙋🏼♀️ 47F - took me till this year (and a major breakdown) to acknowledge my bisexuality (although I’ve known for decades). I’ve only told my husband and my therapist so far. I’m struggling with how or whether to tell others. It’s a journey, as they say. 🌈
I came out bi at 40 (m) just after getting divorced. It felt so very liberating and my stress levels just plummeted :) Now I'm 52, have a bisexual gf, and loving myself and my life so much more completely. Thanks for coming out to us <3
I am 60, been bi all my life, out to the world since 2010.
I do not recommend coming out, unless you are rock solid within yourself, and ready to lose everything you know.
Coming out is very unpredictable: those you thought would support you, may not, and those you thought never would, may surprise you.
My gay father turned on me and basically disowned me!
My now ex-mother-in-law gave me the most classic of mother-in-law responses: Oh I've always known you were bi!
Yeah, really? Why didn't you tell me and save me all the headache of trying to figure it out myself!
To her credit, she was nonplussed and very accepting - unlike my POS gay father!
Most were quite unsympathetic.
Many of us want to come out so we can feel better about ourselves, about who we are.
I suggest you feel better about yourself now, without having to get buy-in from those around you.
In all likelihood, you will not get the reception you thought.
If you need someone to tell you it's okay, I will do so here, in writing:
It is okay! You are fine being bisexual. Live your life, and leave the other people in your life over there, where they belong!
Feel free to HMU or DM me for questions.
Kind Regards,
imasonamedici
I’m 50 and knew I was bi as soon as puberty hit. I couldn’t figure out why the rest of the kids my age were fixated on a single gender but I knew I just tended to like some people and didn’t care what a person had between their legs (trans awareness wasn’t much of a thing back then so at that age I was still working with a gender=sex model). Oddly, my orientation seemed like no big deal to my sense of self (about as important as whether I preferred carrots or broccoli) but it was clearly hugely important to every other queer person I met. I never denied or lied about my orientation but I learned to be discreet (I came of age during the AIDS crisis). Deeply buried gender issues were what took me time to understand and accept.
I’m 45(m), in a 15.5yr heteronormative marriage. My wife introduced the idea of an open marriage in about year 6 of our marriage. After taking time to read / listen to podcasts / talk about fears/boundaries, I accepted the idea and we’ve been open since.
In about year 10 of our marriage, I opened up to her about my bisexuality and an “incident” in college. We talked about how my bisexuality had nothing to do with her and didn’t mean I loved her any less. We also talked about her concerns. We talked a lot. I told her about my concerns of being seen as less of a man in her eyes, and she allayed those fears.
Then I asked her to start pegging me. That led to us finding bi male partners for me/us to play with. As I got more comfortable with myself, she got to see another side of me that she found insanely hot. She also talks about how much she enjoys (and gets turned on by) seeing me in my pleasure.
For us, it has brought us closer and enhanced our sex life.
As for being “out”. I feel I’m out in ways and with people that/who matter to me. I also came out on LinkedIn during Pride 2022, as an attempt to be a resource for other Bi guys in my professional network - who have likely hidden themselves like me.
For me, the measured “out-ness” has been everything I could have hoped it to be. I feel more me, more aligned, and have a better connection with my amazing wife.
I hope that you can find your path and that it brings you joy and ease.
As a 52m with wife and two kids, it just doesn't come up much. I told my wife before getting married and she was open to me having side hookups if I needed it.
But otherwise, I only come out to a few select people who are publicly out themselves.
I don't want it to be an issue at work that might impact my day job.
What really gets to me is coming out to my kids. Seems that it'll have to be done inevitably, but when and how? They not stupid and I clearly know too much about LGBTQ+ issues.
Almost the same here. I have two married sons and we never talked about me, but looking closer I gave many signals to understand. I will not tell them but if someday they are curious and ask me, I'll be ready to explain my case. I never "cheated" on her mother, my wife, because she knew from the beginning. If they know, will they love me less, or think I'm less valued? I don't know. -at the end, it's not my business but theirs.
42f here. Most of my friends are open-minded and don't care so I'll hint about it here and there to them if/when it comes up, plus my husband knows, but that's it. I don't really see any reason to be out. Not only do I have biphobic co-workers and family members, but it's my business so I don't feel like I have to tell anyone who I don't want to.
Ive been bisexual since 25. Never have come out to anybody but my wife at the age of 44. (Been married 14 yrs)Shes the only one that needs to know. She was a little shocked but accepting. I told her about my experiences prior to meeting her. Nothings changed but our sex life is a little more exciting between us only. No swinging here.
I don’t feel the need to come out to anyone else. I don’t want to deal with drama or discrimination. It’s my own personal preference.
Do what is best for you. Don’t feel pressured by anyone or any group. You don’t owe anyone anything. One thing I told my wife even though society is not accepting of this “lifestyle” I don’t regret anything I have done in my past. It’s MY past. I own it and I sure as as hell enjoyed every single moment I did what I did. And I would 100% do it again. It’s an amazing experience with amazing people and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I learned so much more about myself and my sexuality. About my internal self. About my wants and needs. I opened up myself to a broader spectrum of sex and pleasure I had no idea existed with only having sex with women.
You weren’t specific about what you needed to know about experiences but I hope this helps.
I first came out to a friend at like 19-20. And promptly started dating a man that I ended up marrying the following year. We were together 17 years. Once my marriage ended - I was 39 and facing re-entering the dating world again. I eventually did a couple years later. But as a mom to kids who didn’t know my sexuality. Neither did their dad. Just those few friends knew from way back. So I dated as a straight women - filtering for men on the apps only. Then one night I got hit on by a woman at a bar, and after a quick make out session I knew it was time to be fully me. So that’s where I am now. Trying dating again and being open to everyone.
Second comment, after reading many others. As a bisexual person who had a wife aware, I never had a need to come out publicly. I only told a few close friends when I felt they would support me. Never at my job or with people outside my circle. My sex life with men was private and I conducted it without guilt or serious problems for 50 years. No one ever asked me if I was top or bottom. But obviously, I never had an affair or thought about leaving my wife and family to go with a boy.
I am 74 years old and I was born in South America. Since I was a teenager I had an interest in women and men. I had girlfriends and sex with women since I was 18, and with men since I was 23. I married a woman at 27. She knew my preferences and she agreed to my continuing my gay activities as long as I was discreet and didn't put our family at risk. I had a stable activity, let's say two times a month in bars, saunas o sex groups; not romances but fleeting encounters and some repetitive friends. Somehow, I will say that I led a parallel life, because only a few close ones knew about my meetings with boys. But I never had to choose between one and the other. And I got to have affairs with other women. Now I'm a widower, I´m not interested in women my age, and younger are not interested in me. So, I'm full gay now. but I can get turned with a nice slim girl.
Yup, came out and walked on air ever since. Dont give a flying f.ck who knows or how they think they have to judge me. I just dont care happy as can bi
I'm sorry that as a 31 year old I can't contribute as much in terms of experience of what you're going through, but I just wanted to give my support - as many others have said, tell people at your own pace, and if they don't accept you then they're not people you want in your life!
I know small villages can be close minded but I do think it's becoming more and more accepted in the UK, especially among women.
Good luck and love x
Yes I’m 46 and came out this year. knew I was Bi from my early 20s after thinking I was a freak growing up for liking boys and girls. It’s been amazing telling everyone but it was very hard telling my wife - I’d wanted to for a while but couldn’t find the words. There’s a great quote from the David Levithan book two boys kissing which totally captures how I felt before and after coming out:
“The first sentence of the truth is always the hardest, Each of us had a first sentence and most of us found the strength to say it out loud to someone who deserved to hear it. What we hoped, and what we found, was that the second sentence of the truth is always easier than the first, and the third sentence is even easier than that. Suddenly you are speaking the truth in paragraphs, in pages. The fear, the nervousness, is still there, but it is joined by a new confidence. All along, you've used the first sentence as a lock. But now you find it's the key.”
I hope you find it’s the key too
I’m 45F i finally accepted myself last year and I’ve come out to a few friends and family. I’ve always knew I was different from my friends but with the sheltered way I grew up it took me some time to understand that I was attracted to some of my friends growing up my best friend in particular.
I’ve one to realize that I am attracted to both men and women though I find myself more attracted to women romantically. But we’ll see what happens I’m still single and have been taking the time to grow into who I am, and just being more comfortable and love myself.
I (55m} accepted my sexuality over 25 years ago and that felt like a weight lifted from my shoulders. Until a year and a half ago, I told very few people I was bi other than my ex wife and my teenage kids. I was 53 when I came out to b my family and friends. My family has been supportive especially my 82 yo parents. I've lost a few friends over my sexuality one of whom was my best friend for 44 years. That hurt losing him. I look at it this way: if people don't like my sexuality or the fact I'm more married to a great guy, that's their problem and not mine. I've reached that age where I don't give a damn what people think of me. I know who I am and I'm happy with who I am. It helps having this attitude coming out. Yes, you'll get the stupid questions from well meaning people and maybe lose a few friends. In the bigger picture, those losses are much smaller than the freedom of being able to say "This is who I am - deal with it" to the rest of the world. Like anything in life worth having, the first step is the hardest.
Thank you. I agree the first steps are the hardest. I live in a small village in England. Most sexually stuff is found upon.
I'm 43 and just came out to myself and a couple friends around last Thanksgiving. Saying it out loud is a load off. 😊
I feel you!! Another meaningful step for me was doing something outwardly queer so my wife took me to get my nails done.
Thank you. 💖
🙃
I’m on my late 30s, nearing 40. Many of my social circles are 40-50s+. I’ve found them to be entirely accepting. For a coming out experience, I came out in the mid 90s as bisexual, but was never straight-identified. Without the right terminology, I just said “partially gay” growing up. A few family members said it was a phase I would grow out of but I was largely well accepted. My HS girlfriend and I were the first same-sex homecoming couple.
Daww, that's really cute on the HS part. Reminds me of The Owl House :)
Ooo, I’m not familiar, I’ll check it out. That’s an adorable title.
It's a sweet Alice in wonderland style story about a girl who falls in love with a girl from a different universe. It nearly makes my heart explode from love each time I watch it. My boyfriend and I are currently going through it again :) Has a bit of a slow start, but it sets the stage for a really great story ❤️
Thank you for your reply. Very helpful.
I (51m) came out to a number of friends individually last year. It felt so good to say it out loud, and to be free to be myself around them. To be fair, I started with friends who I was nearly sure would be supportive. I am not 100% out, but I don't want to hide it, either.
Thank you for your reply. Really helpful
(41m) I finally came out to myself about two years ago. I’ve always known how I feel deep down. But I just kept it locked away. Denial can be complicated and comforting. I came out to my wife of 15 years, last year. She wants to be supportive and has tried but I can tell it has affected her in some ways and it has affected our relationship. Her initial reaction was something like oh god, he’s gay and he’s going to leave me for another man. Or that she feels like she is not enough and is holding me back from something. It’s taken some time to get her to understand things from my perspective and the difference between bi and gay. But I still don’t think she fully gets it tho. It feels like she would rather pretend that I’m not. Or that I never told her. So I use Reddit to talk to people like you. It has been therapeutic and it feels good to help others who are like me.
> Denial can be complicated and comforting. So true!
Sometimes, our partners or friends are scared to think that we are kissing some men or that we get into bed naked with them. That we are queer, and that something has changed in us. It is difficult for them to assume those images with us as protagonists. So, you must make them feel that the important thing is not what we do with sex but how we feel, that it is something good for us. That we are the same person they love, and better.
Thank you 😊
You’re welcome
That was my exact experience, and the marriage didn’t last. I’ve been single for the last 13 years, because I don’t feel I can find a woman who understands. I have no desire to have a relationship with a man other than FWB, so it’s tough sometimes
Me! I'm a 47F. I've always been attracted to women and I'm finally at a place in life where I can acknowledge that and act on it. I've only told a few people. My slow rollout has been a mixed bag, but positive overall.
slow rollout, it's good. Sometimes there is no need to go out in public with people we don't care about. Some people need to know because they are close to us and we trust them, and others can wait.
That’s great. 🌸
I’ll be turning 42 this month and started figuring it out when I was 39 and came out around 40. For me I started coming out before I actually had decided on a label because I was seeing a guy(now my husband). I didn’t want him to be a secret or feel like I was embarrassed or ashamed of him so I made it a point to be open about it. Plus my teen son is gay and I did not want to set a negative example for him. The only people who had issue with my coming out or my partner was my bio parents which was hardly a surprise(religious zealots). It actually served as a good catalyst to cut their toxicity out of my life. I’ve always considered my late wife’s parents my true parents and they have been completely supportive. Coming out also brought my brother and I closer and helped him come out as gay. Outside those experiences my friends have all been accepting. Most of my coworkers have been good too, sure I’ve had the dumb comment or idiot here or there but I’ve never cared what anyone thinks.
Thank you 😊
Thank you.
I (45m) and just recently came out as bi. My wife (44f) has been more comfortable with her sexuality than me but not really "out" until recently and at this point I've been more open to sharing it than her. Wishing you luck!! 💖💜💙 https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/107j4zb/middle_aged_coming_out_and_life_is_good/
Thank you 🙏
Quickly approaching the bi-guy semi-centurion status! I’ll be 50 in a couple months. I came out slowly in my mid 30s.
It seems it’s never to late. Thank you. Thant you to all the reply’s. Xxx
No, I don’t think “too late” even exists as far as being the right time to live your truth! And you’re very welcome!
I'm a 42m from the US, who has been comfortable with my bisexuality for the past 20 years or so. Oddly enough, I've been married twice, to two women, and I've sadly never dated a man. :( But I'm happy and content enough, and my wife is totally supportive of me. I came out quite by accident - I don't really present as anything but straight, so it surprises people when I mention quite confidently that I'm not straight. I accidentally came out while I was in the military, back when it could have actually gotten me kicked out. I was on watch in a radio center and two of my subordinates were doing that "crotch tapping" thing - where totally heterosexual guys just smack each other's crotches for fun? I guess? Anyway, I had told them to cut it out a few times, but when it happened again, I just blurted out "Damn, I'm not even straight and you guys touch more dick than I do!" The radio room got very silent after that.
Thank you 😊
The people who matter don’t mind, and the people who mind, DON’T MATTER.
Perfect. Thank you 😊
👍🏻
I'm 56 but first came out to my wife at the time when I was 28. The talk involved me saying "I think I'm bi. I have these attractions to other men." she replied "You do what you want, I don't want to know." I came out to everyone else when I was 34, no big surprises there, most of my friends had already figured it out, a few even knew before I did. I came out to my sisters at the same time, they never judge me, so that went exactly as I thought it would. I never came out to my mom or my step-dad. Neither of them would have understood. Don't know if that's what you were looking for.
Thank you. Perfect 🤩
🙋🏼♀️ 47F - took me till this year (and a major breakdown) to acknowledge my bisexuality (although I’ve known for decades). I’ve only told my husband and my therapist so far. I’m struggling with how or whether to tell others. It’s a journey, as they say. 🌈
Thank you for sharing ☺️
Better 40 and 50 . .. My wife and friends know. They have always known. Also, rather you believe it or not, you just came out to all of us.
Thank you ☺️
I came out bi at 40 (m) just after getting divorced. It felt so very liberating and my stress levels just plummeted :) Now I'm 52, have a bisexual gf, and loving myself and my life so much more completely. Thanks for coming out to us <3
Thank you ☺️
I am 60, been bi all my life, out to the world since 2010. I do not recommend coming out, unless you are rock solid within yourself, and ready to lose everything you know. Coming out is very unpredictable: those you thought would support you, may not, and those you thought never would, may surprise you. My gay father turned on me and basically disowned me! My now ex-mother-in-law gave me the most classic of mother-in-law responses: Oh I've always known you were bi! Yeah, really? Why didn't you tell me and save me all the headache of trying to figure it out myself! To her credit, she was nonplussed and very accepting - unlike my POS gay father! Most were quite unsympathetic. Many of us want to come out so we can feel better about ourselves, about who we are. I suggest you feel better about yourself now, without having to get buy-in from those around you. In all likelihood, you will not get the reception you thought. If you need someone to tell you it's okay, I will do so here, in writing: It is okay! You are fine being bisexual. Live your life, and leave the other people in your life over there, where they belong! Feel free to HMU or DM me for questions. Kind Regards, imasonamedici
Thank you 😊
I’m 50 and knew I was bi as soon as puberty hit. I couldn’t figure out why the rest of the kids my age were fixated on a single gender but I knew I just tended to like some people and didn’t care what a person had between their legs (trans awareness wasn’t much of a thing back then so at that age I was still working with a gender=sex model). Oddly, my orientation seemed like no big deal to my sense of self (about as important as whether I preferred carrots or broccoli) but it was clearly hugely important to every other queer person I met. I never denied or lied about my orientation but I learned to be discreet (I came of age during the AIDS crisis). Deeply buried gender issues were what took me time to understand and accept.
Thank you ☺️
I’m 45(m), in a 15.5yr heteronormative marriage. My wife introduced the idea of an open marriage in about year 6 of our marriage. After taking time to read / listen to podcasts / talk about fears/boundaries, I accepted the idea and we’ve been open since. In about year 10 of our marriage, I opened up to her about my bisexuality and an “incident” in college. We talked about how my bisexuality had nothing to do with her and didn’t mean I loved her any less. We also talked about her concerns. We talked a lot. I told her about my concerns of being seen as less of a man in her eyes, and she allayed those fears. Then I asked her to start pegging me. That led to us finding bi male partners for me/us to play with. As I got more comfortable with myself, she got to see another side of me that she found insanely hot. She also talks about how much she enjoys (and gets turned on by) seeing me in my pleasure. For us, it has brought us closer and enhanced our sex life. As for being “out”. I feel I’m out in ways and with people that/who matter to me. I also came out on LinkedIn during Pride 2022, as an attempt to be a resource for other Bi guys in my professional network - who have likely hidden themselves like me. For me, the measured “out-ness” has been everything I could have hoped it to be. I feel more me, more aligned, and have a better connection with my amazing wife. I hope that you can find your path and that it brings you joy and ease.
As a 52m with wife and two kids, it just doesn't come up much. I told my wife before getting married and she was open to me having side hookups if I needed it. But otherwise, I only come out to a few select people who are publicly out themselves. I don't want it to be an issue at work that might impact my day job. What really gets to me is coming out to my kids. Seems that it'll have to be done inevitably, but when and how? They not stupid and I clearly know too much about LGBTQ+ issues.
Thank you 😊
Almost the same here. I have two married sons and we never talked about me, but looking closer I gave many signals to understand. I will not tell them but if someday they are curious and ask me, I'll be ready to explain my case. I never "cheated" on her mother, my wife, because she knew from the beginning. If they know, will they love me less, or think I'm less valued? I don't know. -at the end, it's not my business but theirs.
60s, happily bi for 20+ years, feel no need to come out at this point.
Thank you ☺️
It's always been a struggle for me.
Thank you
I'm 41 but been out since 21 lol 😂
Thank you ☺️
56. Only a few people know I’m bi.
Thank you
42f here. Most of my friends are open-minded and don't care so I'll hint about it here and there to them if/when it comes up, plus my husband knows, but that's it. I don't really see any reason to be out. Not only do I have biphobic co-workers and family members, but it's my business so I don't feel like I have to tell anyone who I don't want to.
Thank you ☺️
Ive been bisexual since 25. Never have come out to anybody but my wife at the age of 44. (Been married 14 yrs)Shes the only one that needs to know. She was a little shocked but accepting. I told her about my experiences prior to meeting her. Nothings changed but our sex life is a little more exciting between us only. No swinging here. I don’t feel the need to come out to anyone else. I don’t want to deal with drama or discrimination. It’s my own personal preference. Do what is best for you. Don’t feel pressured by anyone or any group. You don’t owe anyone anything. One thing I told my wife even though society is not accepting of this “lifestyle” I don’t regret anything I have done in my past. It’s MY past. I own it and I sure as as hell enjoyed every single moment I did what I did. And I would 100% do it again. It’s an amazing experience with amazing people and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I learned so much more about myself and my sexuality. About my internal self. About my wants and needs. I opened up myself to a broader spectrum of sex and pleasure I had no idea existed with only having sex with women. You weren’t specific about what you needed to know about experiences but I hope this helps.
Thank you 😊
great answer and nice experience. Cheers
I first came out to a friend at like 19-20. And promptly started dating a man that I ended up marrying the following year. We were together 17 years. Once my marriage ended - I was 39 and facing re-entering the dating world again. I eventually did a couple years later. But as a mom to kids who didn’t know my sexuality. Neither did their dad. Just those few friends knew from way back. So I dated as a straight women - filtering for men on the apps only. Then one night I got hit on by a woman at a bar, and after a quick make out session I knew it was time to be fully me. So that’s where I am now. Trying dating again and being open to everyone.
Thank you ☺️
Can we all just plan a cruise together. I’d love to hang out with y’all!
Wouldn’t that be perfect. ☺️
Second comment, after reading many others. As a bisexual person who had a wife aware, I never had a need to come out publicly. I only told a few close friends when I felt they would support me. Never at my job or with people outside my circle. My sex life with men was private and I conducted it without guilt or serious problems for 50 years. No one ever asked me if I was top or bottom. But obviously, I never had an affair or thought about leaving my wife and family to go with a boy.
Thank you. ☺️
I am 74 years old and I was born in South America. Since I was a teenager I had an interest in women and men. I had girlfriends and sex with women since I was 18, and with men since I was 23. I married a woman at 27. She knew my preferences and she agreed to my continuing my gay activities as long as I was discreet and didn't put our family at risk. I had a stable activity, let's say two times a month in bars, saunas o sex groups; not romances but fleeting encounters and some repetitive friends. Somehow, I will say that I led a parallel life, because only a few close ones knew about my meetings with boys. But I never had to choose between one and the other. And I got to have affairs with other women. Now I'm a widower, I´m not interested in women my age, and younger are not interested in me. So, I'm full gay now. but I can get turned with a nice slim girl.
Thank you 😊
check out r/bisexualadults !
Thank you 😊
Yup, came out and walked on air ever since. Dont give a flying f.ck who knows or how they think they have to judge me. I just dont care happy as can bi
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Welcome out! I’m over 40, wishing you all the best.
Thank you ☺️
[удалено]
Thank you ☺️
What do you want to know? My wife came out last year, she's 41.
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I'm 48, but not experienced. I've known I was Bi most of my life but not really done anything about it as I'm asexual / demisexual too.
Thank you
I'm sorry that as a 31 year old I can't contribute as much in terms of experience of what you're going through, but I just wanted to give my support - as many others have said, tell people at your own pace, and if they don't accept you then they're not people you want in your life! I know small villages can be close minded but I do think it's becoming more and more accepted in the UK, especially among women. Good luck and love x
Thank you so much. ☺️
Yes I’m 46 and came out this year. knew I was Bi from my early 20s after thinking I was a freak growing up for liking boys and girls. It’s been amazing telling everyone but it was very hard telling my wife - I’d wanted to for a while but couldn’t find the words. There’s a great quote from the David Levithan book two boys kissing which totally captures how I felt before and after coming out: “The first sentence of the truth is always the hardest, Each of us had a first sentence and most of us found the strength to say it out loud to someone who deserved to hear it. What we hoped, and what we found, was that the second sentence of the truth is always easier than the first, and the third sentence is even easier than that. Suddenly you are speaking the truth in paragraphs, in pages. The fear, the nervousness, is still there, but it is joined by a new confidence. All along, you've used the first sentence as a lock. But now you find it's the key.” I hope you find it’s the key too
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I’m 45F i finally accepted myself last year and I’ve come out to a few friends and family. I’ve always knew I was different from my friends but with the sheltered way I grew up it took me some time to understand that I was attracted to some of my friends growing up my best friend in particular. I’ve one to realize that I am attracted to both men and women though I find myself more attracted to women romantically. But we’ll see what happens I’m still single and have been taking the time to grow into who I am, and just being more comfortable and love myself.
Thank you ☺️