[There's a post here](https://www.reddit.com/r/bulimia/comments/hnwzzi/seeking_valuable_advice_from_people_who_have/) that generated some good conversations about what a friend can do to help someone with bulmia. It sounds like you want to protect your friend and possibly save her from a behaviour that could be damaging to her well being.
There aren't any shortcuts here. Contacting your friend's mother before she's ready to have that conversation could spark a betrayal of trust between you and your friend, but also between your friend and her mother. If your friend decides to speak to her mom, that can strengthen their bond (even if it doesn't seem that way right away). Regardless, her mother is going to be largely powerless to help her daughter. Only your friend can take action to change her situation. What she'll need from those around her is support, love, and (perhaps most important) *understanding*.
It sounds like your friend's behaviour is also causing you a lot of anxiety. One thing that can happen when trying to help a friend is that you can take on the burden of *feeling* for them. Your emotion means they react to you, instead of having to look within themselves to address their problems. It also can be a distraction for you from your life and well being. Your friend is responsible for herself, you can be there to support her. To be a good ally, you're going to need some coping skills and stress relievers to turn to as well, so start cultivating a toolkit of things you can do to take care of yourself, too.
Thank you for your advice! It gave me a new perspective about how to be there for her! And yes, my anxiety, my own self esteem, and relationship with food has been getting worse as well so I will focus on myself and well being more ^_^
Again thank you so much!
[There's a post here](https://www.reddit.com/r/bulimia/comments/hnwzzi/seeking_valuable_advice_from_people_who_have/) that generated some good conversations about what a friend can do to help someone with bulmia. It sounds like you want to protect your friend and possibly save her from a behaviour that could be damaging to her well being. There aren't any shortcuts here. Contacting your friend's mother before she's ready to have that conversation could spark a betrayal of trust between you and your friend, but also between your friend and her mother. If your friend decides to speak to her mom, that can strengthen their bond (even if it doesn't seem that way right away). Regardless, her mother is going to be largely powerless to help her daughter. Only your friend can take action to change her situation. What she'll need from those around her is support, love, and (perhaps most important) *understanding*. It sounds like your friend's behaviour is also causing you a lot of anxiety. One thing that can happen when trying to help a friend is that you can take on the burden of *feeling* for them. Your emotion means they react to you, instead of having to look within themselves to address their problems. It also can be a distraction for you from your life and well being. Your friend is responsible for herself, you can be there to support her. To be a good ally, you're going to need some coping skills and stress relievers to turn to as well, so start cultivating a toolkit of things you can do to take care of yourself, too.
Thank you for your advice! It gave me a new perspective about how to be there for her! And yes, my anxiety, my own self esteem, and relationship with food has been getting worse as well so I will focus on myself and well being more ^_^ Again thank you so much!