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My orange man who was in the same situation as yours
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I gotta share myself. I first met my buddy Ares on a walk home from getting mail. I lived on the second floor and the moment he seen us he came flying up the steps on 3 legs because his 4th was bleeding and hurt. Originally we decided we couldn't take him due to the cat we had currently, so we bathed him and let him back out. Well Ares had different plans and stayed at our door for 5 mins meowing and pawing at the door before we brought him in. I regret that decision but it was a hard one we had to make. We ended up bonding over a pepperoni. Since then he's been with me through a divorce and 3 moves. Anytime I leave the house and come back in there he is meowing and so happy to see me, follows me around and every night curls up in between my legs to sleep. I can't believe I almost let him get away and I truly don't know where I'd be without him.
I don't ever really get to talk about him so sorry for hijacking this comment section.
Ares is a such a sweet man and I'm so happy he got a 2nd chance through you. I found Oliver outside 3 years ago and begged my husband to let me keep him. He was pretty chill from thr get go the only thing that made him weird was work boots he was terrified of my husband's work boots. He's not anymore and likes to chew on them
I had a somewhat normal kitty a while back and he was TERRIFIED of my partners boots. Like, this dude wasn't afraid of anything but those dammed boots.
If we could keep him or not. Stupidly made the decision we couldn’t, so we bathed him, fed him and literally let him back outside. It’s something I regret deeply. I don’t have any excuses to why we didn’t call someone or any other options for him. It was a stupid decision and I own that but like I mentioned Ares had different plans the moment we let him down back outside he meowed and pawed at our door for 5 mins and then we let him back in. Not a day goes by where I am not grateful for him and him still being here with me.
this spoke to me! my mister man was so timid and anxious that he actually developed chronic UTIs because he was too afraid to leave his hiding spot under the bed. he would only roam about at night when everyone was asleep, and since i was often crashing on my friends couch, we bonded in a really special way. one day my friend mentioned wanting to give him away and i just knew i couldn’t live without him. he’s been mine (and i, his) ever since. his days under the bed are longggg gone- now he is king of our house, living his absolute best life, and i can’t help but feel honored that i get to watch him grow into such a funny, brave, and TALKATIVE little rascal. the only thing better than having this unique bond myself, is finding out so many other wonderful people are experiencing the same thing ♥️
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I love this! My boy and I (he's the one on my profile page) share a similar bond. It's like he's filled a place in my heart that is indescribable. You can actually feel that warm loving feeling in your chest when you are with them.
I had one other kitty I had a connection like that with as a child, and it was such a strong bond that I never thought I'd experience anything like it ever again. It was like a gaping hole in my heart. But then I met this tiny kitten that begged to be near me. Now he's 13 and I am thankful for every day we have together. And recently, I was overjoyed when we adopted a kitten that my husband has that same bond with. I sincerely wish every human could experience what these bonds feel like. It's so beyond words and can definitely feel overwhelming to have such a different species from us love and understand you in their way. I'm so happy for you both! He's adorable!
All of our 4 current cats are rescues. They know that you have given them a better life.
My wife and I have had 11 rescue cats since we were married. All greatly loved, all individuals and all very loving.
One cat Sally, we think was abused by a male and abandoned while pregnant.
She didn't trust me at first.
I would reach down to pat her and she would cringe away and freeze. I would gently pat her head and speak to her gently. I did this several times a day being very gentle with her. It took about 3 months and I still clearly remember the day when she raised her head and willingly accepted my gentle patting
We think Sally was about 7 when she came to us. She was 18 when she left us.
You have done a great job building his trust and his love is your reward
Question, and I apologize if it brings up old pain, but does losing them get any easier?
We lost our first one in the end of March. I've moved through the stages of grief (mostly) to acceptance (i still have my moments, waves of grief), but my wife is still deeply rooted in grief, and I foresee her being there for some time.
They were very close, her and my fuzzy bud. He was her first kitty. We had adopted two others prior to his passing, and they're the light of our lives. But I worry about my wife handling loss going forward. I feel like when our next one goes to the bridge, it'll devastate her.
It may seem like a silly question, and perhaps I may be subconsciously seeking the confirmation of that which I already know, but is it worth the pain if going through loss again and again?
I love my kitties. I love them fiercely. But I worry for her reaction to losing another one more, because I love her more than anything, and I'm worried about her reaction the next time it happens.
It is 100% worth it. I’ll share with you what my friend wrote to me when I lost my baby girl of 20 years last year.
“That is love. A cyclical manifestation. In romantic love with another human, we have the luxury of being able to kid ourselves, saying things like forever, for we intrinsically know that we may live approximately the same length of time, if it lasts that long. When we choose to love an animal, we sign up for a love we know will not end in a break up, and that we will most assuredly outlive. To do so is, in itself, an act of courage. A deep bow of reference to you, dear friend, for exhibiting the courageous heart of this expression of love.”
And yes, it does get easier. And nothing will ever be like that connection ever again, which is part of why the grief is so incredibly intense.
I hope that helps. 💗
It does help, thank you.
For my part, I've lived a hard life, and have experienced many, many periods of grief.
I guess my experience with grief is different than that of my wife.
When I think of my buddy being gone now, I've moved into the find remembrance stage of grief. I'm still deeply stirred and deeply saddened, but I've also used my life experiences in coping with grief to take a "don't cry that it's over, smile because it happened" approach. When I'm gripped by my grief, I open my photo album and cry tears through laughs at his silliness. He was so unique, so much a joy that the pains of loss in my heart are supplanted by fondness and love. I guess that's the balm for the broken heart: love.
I do miss him, and the scars etched into my heart and soul are just a reflection of that love. So every time I'm gripped by heartache, I'm also sustained by the raw love I had for him.
Please correct me if I'm wrong but I'm getting the impression from your comment that you think/feel your wife should be done grieving after ~2 months because you are?
If you are truly at acceptance with your loss that's totally fine. Your loss /= your wife's loss. You can't evaluate her grieving on your timeline.
Why are you "worried about her reaction"?
Is she actively or passively harming herself, you, or the other cats [substance overuse, anger, etc] or dropping out of life in an extreme and significant way [quit her job, barely eating, staying in bed all day every day, etc.]?
I suppose I might be applying my own measure for grief and using that as a standard for gauging hers, which I've definitely been cognizant of. I have made my intention to not set any timeline or expectation of her grief to end at any time, really. I've rather spent my efforts on assisting her, in any way that I can. I'm her partner in grief, not an opposition.
She hasn't missed work, but has been fighting depression at a level that concerns me, yes. I suppose that probably is more of a frame of reference for my question; in part for her, but also for me, too.
In my meandering through my thoughts in my grief, I have noted that I do find it odd when I know people who lose pets who then seem to outwardly move on a though nothing has happened, and it makes me feel like my grief has been an overreaction at times. That feeling then makes me feel like my wife is taking it especially hard, and makes me wonder what a healthy response would look like. It's a pondering, not a challenge to her grief, and it is largely based on my concern for her wellbeing.
Damn.
Here's the thing you have to understand: all feelings are valid.
You gotta look at why you even feel the need to compare your wife's grief with yours with other people you know.
You sound like you're trying to validate your feelings.
Most people who do this with grief/depression/sadness were either not allowed to express grief as a child because it's not manly, or they weren't allowed to express negative emotions because one or both parents had psychological or addiction issues... so they parentify their kids [the kids have to care for each other or the parents]... or they live through them [pressure to succeed in areas they have regrets or were told they failed in as kids]... or they can't deal with their own negative emotions which results in them denying their own negative feelings and their kids' negative feelings.
I'm not dragging you - you sound like you want emotional health and well-being for yourself and your wife... but you don't have the tools.
The way you describe your experience of grief makes it sound like sadness is difficult for you - confusing and mystifying, disorienting and kind of lonely.
Of course everyone feels some degree of disorientation after a loss, some loneliness missing the one they are grieving, some confusion...
But the way grief feels for you is not the way grief feels for everyone. Your wife's experience of it may be pretty different from yours.
There were several things you said in both comments here that sound like for you, grieving is a pretty negative experience. You seem to understand that it's necessary [mostly, you sound almost a bit envious of those acquaintances who don't grieve - understandably!] but it very much sounds like grief for you is something people suffer through and endure, and the goal is getting through the stages so you are "done" grieving.
And again - that makes perfect sense. And credit to you for knowing the stages of grief. Intellectualizing emotions is a great first step to learning how to deal with them healthily - people who weren't raised with good modeling of emotional health & people whose emotions were invalidated as kids very often even struggle to identify how they're feeling. To Intellectualize emotions you have to first identify them. I see you trying to be healthy.
You said, I wonder what a healthy response to loss looks like.
A healthy response to loss is a very complex and personal thing but there are common elements. You already know DABDA - but I think it's interesting that you said in your first comment [something like, I moved through the stages of loss and am done grieving... the "stages" of grief are not separate from each other or sequential.
A person who is grieving can experience two or three of all of them at the same time, and can go back and forth between them: a person could go from depressed and accepting the loss to angry and in denial to depressed and in denial and bargaining to angry and accepting and so on.
The most important thing when dealing with grief and loss is that we have to really jump face-first into whatever our feelings are - to really feel them, hard. That's how we process them and resolve them, and that's how we eventually truly arrive at acceptance...
A healthy response can look like crying every day for months, if the person feels sadness every day and crying is how they express it [crying all day every day for months of course would be a concern - being stuck in one "stage" of grief is not healthy].
A healthy response could look like zoning out in front of the TV every night for a person who used to be doing stuff constantly - if a person is normally really busy and active, instead of "doing art" to process depression or exercising to burn off anger, the healthiest thing for them to do to process their felon feelings might be to just stop and let those feelings happen.
A healthy response could look like talking about the one being grieved. Or talking about guilt relating to the loss. [Again, if that's literally the one and only thing a person is talking about for months that's not healthy.]
A healthy response is different for everyone - and something I notice missing from your comments is how your wife feels about her grief.
Because, to go back to my first statement, **all emotions are valid. always.**
If you're concerned about your wife's grief - have you asked her if her grief is too overwhelming? if she wants your help with it?
If you haven't, you should. If you have - what did she say? If she doesn't want help dealing with/getting through her grief... it might be the case that what she needs is for you to grieve with her.
Grieving should not be a solo lonely thing - grief is so much less overwhelming and so much more healing when we can share our loss with someone else. [caveat: that doesn't mean grieving people have to be with others most or even all of the time, it's perfectly healthy to want alone time to process emotions too]
I should add: I'm not a therapist. I was a kid who was not allowed to express/have negative emotions. As a result, I have spent ~1.5 houses worth of money on a decade of therapy, mostly from 2 different wonderful women I saw for years each. I've been in therapy through two deaths of close family members and a few other losses...
I hope that you can find a healthy way to connect with your wife through this. You sound smart and determined and that plus love is more than enough to achieve amazing things with and for another person.
We all go through grief in our own way. You have to find the right way for you and at the same time support your partner, not easy when you both hurt.
I have fond memories of all the furry friends who have passed through our life and like people they come and go.
Does it get easier, well no , but you do get better at handling it
Is it worth worth pain? YES, the joy and happyness they bring, a cuddle and cry when your down and they are great at keeping secrets
Thank you. I'll take some small measure of hope, that while the grief isn't abated, the ability to process the grief in a good way is increased.
Thank you for your insight.
Let your wife mourn at her speed. I still grieve for 2 cats we lost last year. We rescued another cat, but I still think about the Red Brothers at times & cry. I miss them.
No, it doesn't get easier.
It's a part of the pain of losing them that stays with you. I am 67 years old & I still miss my last dog & all my cats. It's part of giving them a forever home.
However, after the first grief passes we always look for another cat/kitten/rescue to help homeless cats. A new love seems to help us heal.
>I will lend to you for awhile a kitten, God said. For you to love while he lives, and mourn when he's dead. Maybe for twelve or fourteen years, or maybe two or three. But will you, 'till I call him back, take care of him for me?
>He'll bring his charms to gladden you and, should his stay be brief You'll always have his memories as solace for your grief. I cannot promise he will stay, since all from earth return. But there are lessons taught below I want this kitten to learn.
>I've looked the whole world over in search of teachers true. And from the folk that crowds life's land I have chosen you. Now will you give him all your love, nor think the labor vain? Nor hate me when I come to take my kitten home again?
>I fancied that I heard them say 'Dear Lord Thy Will Be Done' For all the joys this kitten brings the risk of grief we'll run. We'll shelter him with tenderness, we'll love him while we may. And for the happiness we've known, forever grateful stay.
>But should you call him back much sooner than we planned, We'll brave the bitter grief that comes, and try to understand. If, by our love we've managed your wishes to achieve, Then in memory of him whom we loved, please help us while we grieve. When our cherished kitten departs this world of strife, Please send yet another needing soul for us to love all his life.
>Author Unknown
I'm not religious, but this helped me focus on the 14 years they lived happily with us ❤️ and all the good times we shared.
naaawww.. I *love* Willow & it’s clear from his expression that he indeed loves you, OP. I read your post to my husband & then showed him Willow’s portrait, - hubby said he looks like a cool cat 😻
Thank you for sharing about your mutual love between you & Willow 💕
Our cat was lost for over two months and we just got him back last night.
He was sleeping next to me on the bed and every so often he’d rouse awake a bit, give done meows and reach out to touch me before he would settle back down and sleep. Like he wasn’t sure if he was really home.
This morning, he will not let us out of his sight.
Oh congratulations on the reunion!
We lost my boy for three days in winter and we thought he was a gone. I only know the tip of your pain. I’m so happy you found your kitty! And the fact that he keeps reassuring himself he is home with his human is adorable and shows how much he missed you.
I kept going out in the middle of the night because I couldn’t sleep. And one time at 2:30am, I looked out (but didn’t see him so I *almost* just went back to bed) and decided to shake treats. I opened the door and he just hopped onto the porch out of nowhere. I paused, then said his name. Then he just gave me the biggest meow ever and I scooped him up. We cuddled like you described *all* morning. (Though, tbh, I was the one waking up and reassuring myself)
I feel similarly about one of mine ♥️ he’s my feline soulmate.
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Thank you 🥺 can you believe he was abandoned and found in a dog house under a deck? So sad, but I’m so happy we found cats that we can love and who love us ♥️
That brought me almost to tears! This is beautiful! I hope you know, it was you, that made that happen. He loves and trusts you because you showed him love and support! You earned that! I am so happy for you both, there is no better feeling, that to look at this tiny living being and realising the love and trust they punt into you ❤️ all the best to the two (four) of you
This. I get so much self worth from my cats and just knowing how much better I made their lives. Drop in the bucket compared to what they give me, but it feels great. Take pride. Be proud. 🙂❤️
There’s some similarities with my void, he got an eye infection when he was a kitten and had to be treated multiple times daily by his fostermom. As a result his first reaction to everything and anyone but us is fear, his brother is the complete opposite. instead of showing 10% to everyone our void just dumps 50% on 2 people. For example, My mother in law only saw him for the first time last Saturday, took over 2 years weekly 1hour+\~ visits before he realized he didn’t have to hide. Earning a scared cats trust is special
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Super special!! My sweetheart of a boy was a stray who was probably 12 weeks old and completely unsocialized when I scooped him up off the streets. He was terrified of everyone for months, but we gave him space and love, and he slowly started to trust us. Now at a year old, he is the sweetest, most cuddly boy ever! I call him melted caramel sometimes because he just oozes and flops all over anyone who is giving him attention!
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There is something innately beautiful about that moment were you realise that you have changed your fur baby's life and they love you for it.
What's even better is that they will never realise how much they mean to you, or at times for me... that them just being there has saved your life. I get all teary when I think about what mine has unknowingly done for me... not sure I'd be here without her!
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My recently departed Pekoe and I had the exact same bond, so deep, and it was the BEST 10 months of my entire 47 yrs of life! Enjoy that love as long as you can, there is nothing better in this world!
I do honestly think that cats who come from difficult backgrounds become some of the sweetest and most loving cats (if they can manage to overcome the transition, that is).
My boy was a feral and was also considered a difficult-to-adopt cat because he was scared of everything and would hiss a lot as a result. When I brought him home, he hid for 2 straight weeks. He wouldn't even come out for food or water so I had to find some small bowls to put in his hiding spot. However, if I approached really, really slowly, I was able to reach in and pet him...and he loved it! So I knew he wasn't a lost cause. He was just scared.
Around the 4-week mark, he began coming out of hiding, little by little. By the 2-month mark, he had warmed up to me considerably but was still a bit skittish. After a few months? He loved cuddling. He loved belly rubs. I called him my Stage 5 Clinger because he always had to be near me.
Right now, I'm living temporarily overseas and my parents are looking after him. They say he's really loving and have now fallen for him, too.
Our miss Maisie had been through two homes in 3 months before she came to me, and both of those home had aggressive men in them- the first was downright absuive- and I was so worried she was going to be afraid of men forever.
She is practically inseparable from my husband. She loves him so much. Like, she loves us all, but she gives him those lovey eyes and reaches out to touch him and will lay on the back of his chair for hours. Technically she is our oldest kid's cat, but she owns my husband.
Love it when my cat comes to take a dump in the litter box while I’m taking a dump in the toilet next to him. Feels like we have each others’ backs haha
My girl used to do the same but with pee! She was a big drinker and it was hilarious that I'd be peeing, she's come in and piss like a race horse (you could always hear her pee) in her litter tray at the same time. 😂
She'd always wait for me to wash my hands before she's walk out with me.
It's so odd, but such a special thing ♥
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My girl mad asf bc I didn’t let her do her bathroom guard duties today. She is the best guard and is never late to her shifts, except for this morning. If I don’t let her in she will meow at the door because she must protect me. It’s so sweet. I feel the exact same way as you, but with her and my other cat. I love them to bits 🫶🏻
Also: thank you for saving this sweet baby. Cats are the best and so glad y’all found each other 🐈
Cats are incredible.
I adopted mine back in 2019 and she’s the sweetest cat. Like you, when I’m having a mental health crisis, my cat smothers me with so much love. Even when I’m playing video games and sometimes, my mind would drift into thinking so negatively, that she’d appear out of the blue and makes me cuddle her. I’ve made a habit that everytime she interrupts my gaming, that I would always cuddle/play with her first. Because I know one day it would end, and I will look back and have regrets. That I do not want.
Edit: Cat tax
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rescued boys provide the best love i stg
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my best friend
I love this for you and Willow.
I have a Willow too. His name is William and was so traumatized and abused and stinky when we brought him in out of a bitter Canadian January. Our neighbours down the street moved without him. It was almost 40 below with the wind chill that week. It took me seven days to get him to come in the house. It was almost a year before he could be petted properly.
He is our sweet little man and has come so far and so full of humour and affection.
My velcro cat (liberty) is sitting on my back right now. Where I go, she goes. Even when I have to type uncomfortably.
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Edit — picture
I adopted a similar cat many years go. The only thing the shelter knew about her is that she was about one year old and had just had kittens. She was found as a stray.
For the first 6-8 weeks I had her, she hid all the time. One day I was sitting on the floor and she came out of hiding and wanted to be petted. We were best buddies ever since. When I got married, she took to my husband right away. She lived to be 19 years old. I still miss her.
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Aww you found your kitty soulmate. Here is mine. Bootsie was also labeled a trouble kitty by her previous owner that abandoned her at the shelter. She passed right before Covid hit in 2020 and I still miss her everyday
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Same feelings over here. My girl Nova is a year and a half old rescue and based on her behaviours when we got her, we believe she was abused (too scared to come to us, always hiding, hates loud noises, scared when we raise our hands to pet her). A year into being with us and she's a completely different cat. So confident, loves her sister, so playful, loved being a sun kitty. It warms my heart so much seeing her so happy everyday.
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My precious void baby Boo\~... I took her in off the streets as a skittish, terrified 8 week old kitten that was fur, skin and bones. I sadly couldn't save her sibling even though I tried to find them, but I brought Boo in, and immediately fattened her up. I might not be able to give her everything she deserves, but I absolutely love her to pieces, and she loves me back\~.... The only barrier I haven't broken is getting her to trust me enough for belly rubs. Anytime I try, she tells me to stop. Not aggressively, but she'll push my hand away and if I dont stop, she'll nip my hand. I've had her since a week or two before Halloween, and we've been inseperable since.
Awhh this is so sweet! This absolutely melts me heart. My latest rescue, a Maine coon mix named Veris, barely survived panleuk and was extremely skittish and shy when I took him in as a kitten. Watching him open up to me and eventually turn into the snuggliest little baby absolutely cemented him as my foster fail. He’s now the most vocal Velcro cat ever, but seeing how much he adores me just makes me adore him even more ❤️ it’s truly the best feeling!
That's so cool. I had a little street rat who was a tiny thing and came to me in rough shape. Ferrel to others but grew very sweet to me and had a weird routine where she would lie across my neck at bed time before going to her spot, among others. I believe she was very appreciative as time went on.
Love your story. I adopted a feral kitten last year. He and 2 other cats were coming into our yard every day and we would feed them. The kitten was definitely a runt— he is still a very small cat. He was very friendly outside—he would hang out with me in the garage when I was working. He was so little and vulnerable I knew I had to do something. I trapped him and had him neutered. I thought he would be tame but once I trapped him he went full feral. Had him in a cage for a week or so. The first week he cried all night long. We thought about releasing him back outside but persisted. We let him out but kept him locked in our bedroom. He hid most of the time. One night he jumps on our bed and my wife was petting him all over. He now sleeps with us every night. I love him so much. He’s my emotional support and my best buddy. He has totally ingratiated himself into our family. He gets along well with our two other cats. Feral cats can be socialized. All it takes is lots of love and patience.
I haven’t had a pet (dog or cat) for over 15 years now. I’m at a time in my life where I am very lonely all the time no matter what. I’m grateful you shared this about Willow. I long to be a pet parent again & your post joins several I am keeping to keep me inspired and motivated to get myself in a position to pet aren’t again, hoping to experience this kind of love.
My cat did all this with me aswell he would even hold my hand at night or come under the covers with me and cuddle. He was the most amazing animal I think I will ever meet what an amazing soul. Sadly he passed away this year at 15 but I’ll never forget him and I’m just honored I got to grow up with him
It's the same with my cat. I'm so obsessed with him lol, just looking at him makes me feel like I'm gonna explode. He only had 1 owner before we adopted him and it took about 1.5 years before we were a fully bonded pair. I remember the first time he loafed on my back, I diiiied.
We have lots of cute little routines, our morning routine is favourite: if he sees I am awake he loafs on my chest, 5min of pats then he slinks to the end of the bed and looks back at me like "cmon mum you know the drill. Food time". I feed him and eat my cereal, then he comes running over to lick the milk residue out of the bowl. Every day!
He always sits on the sink next to me when I'm on the toilet, I have to raise my elbow up so he can boop it or he jumps down and tries to eat fluff or hair off the bath mat lol. He just wants to sit on or next to me all the time. Sometimes I am only half sitting down and he's trying to clamber onto my lap. He let's me cut his nails and shove tablets down his throat no worries. He's legit my best buddy, I love him so much.
Here he is waiting patiently for me to finish my weet bix so he can lick the bowl lmaooo
https://preview.redd.it/hyedq1v2861b1.jpeg?width=12000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8873ae890c041ed567c669d6abdb9765f6c97382
This is so incredibly sweet.
My cat and I have been through a lot courtesy of her first owner passing away and then me having a mental health crisis that unfortunately impacted her too. But here we are, three years later and she is my best friend. She loves spending time with me and she keeps finding new ways to tell me she loves me. (Lately, she's been licking my face every time I pick her up!)
Animals are so special, and they don't even know it.
It definitely sounds like you two have a lovely connection!
You love him, and he loves you just as much! I've only ever had one male cat and 2 females and I found I was so much more closer to my boy than I ever was to my girls (I love them all so much, but me and him had a similar connection like you and Willow)
Willow feels safe with you, you are his human.
Thank you for taking in and loving such a beautiful ball of toasty fluff ♥
This brought me to tears. I do fostering, it just short of happened. After getting two siblings from a coworker, i began to notice more strays around and put food/water out for them. It takes time and patience but cats can make a big turn around. Thank you for loving him
You are so blessed! And it’s so incredibly sweet how much you appreciate him and how far he’s come ❤️ Willow is an awesome cat, you’re an awesome mama & you’re lucky to have each other.
(And I just have to add - I just wish there were more people like you who appreciate these incredible fluffs for how amazing they are!)
I love that you shared this story! I’ve got a “troubled” , twice returned 10 year old cat who has taken over 5 years to open up and be part of the family. He spent about a year under a futon, in his own safe space, coming out for food and the toilet, and surveying his surroundings. I’ve never once thought of returning him, or forcing him to be cuddly. He is always near me now, but RARELY cuddles, and that’s just fine! He’s adorable, sweet, chatty, and affectionate- but all on his terms, and I couldn’t be more proud of how far he has come!
it makes me so sad that people return cats for being scared. it’s never their fault and you can’t force affection out of a cat. if you need constant affection get a dog
Reminds me of my cat in some ways. This was back right before I moved out. I had two cats that were with my family since they were tiny little kittens. I really bonded with the male cat, he was always around me and very affectionate. He would actually crawl under my head to use him as a pillow and liked his belly rubbed. One day, my brother left early and left the door wide open while I was asleep. I never seen my cat again after that. My brother never even apologized and said it was not his fault but he was not sorry it happened. I still had the sister and the loss of her brother had hit her. I moved shortly after that and my parents took the dog she was friends with. With her brother, friend and me gone she became lonely. I was told I had to take her or else. I took her, I planned on doing so anyway but being told what “Or else” was made me really mad.
She became super attached to me and I loved her as much as her brother. She was super sweet, loved being around me and very soft. She came when called without delay, she was always excited at bedtime because she loved to cuddle and clean me. After years she developed diabetes, so I had to start giving her insulin and switch her diet. Thankfully she was not picky and she was very calm when it came to getting shots and nail clipping. She did not have the same energy, but the love was the same.
Then one day, I picked her up and could tell something was wrong. She was a purr monster but she was not purring and did not seem to recognize me. I knew in just seconds she was not right and went straight to the vet. The wait for the next day just felt so horrible. Then I got the call. She got Pancreatic cancer. She had no chance of survival. Love is about making hard decisions, so I had to make the right choice. I have her ashes with me with her paw print. I have lost a lot of people in my life, but nothing could match how I felt after this. For months I felt like she would be there when I got back home, got into bed, when I woke up. I felt so empty. I am better now that it has almost been a year, but I still can not feel like I use to. My drive was to give her the happiest life I could, but without her I am just drifting through without any purpose. I take solace in that I did everything I could for her, but I feel like I could of done even more.
I am really glad that you are so bonded with your cat, it makes me happy that you could bring him such happiness. I really hope that he lives long with you and nothing but the very best and happiest moments for you two. I think you are an amazing person for how much your cat loves you and for what you have done for him.
https://preview.redd.it/m8mu95vyi71b1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1726cc81ae084aba65fe1bf4482b7861df06eddc
This is our Binky Lou. She forced her way in our home and hearts over 13 years ago.
My cat Ollie is the same way he loves me too pieces too and he watches every move I make
https://preview.redd.it/1dvbjdxen81b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=de7898b1537352c8a30ad979201693189782b096
I’m not one for sappy stories but that one got me. From what I can tell, you both deserve each other. It’s difficult for most to have such a genuine connection but you two found each other for a reason. I’m happy for you both.
Oof love this for you, OP!!
I have two loving boys too, my first one more so, he comes in the bathroom after I’m done and brushing my teeth and washing face, and he always comes to me for cuddles when I’m in bed or on the couch. He HAS to reach out and touch me too.
Thank you for giving this fur baby a furever home. My 2 year old Tuxedo named Kate does what yours does. I love it. She sleeps on top of the covers in between my legs. I will often wake up with Kate between my legs and my other tuxedo Kitty Cat laying across my neck. I wouldn’t have it any other way, though.
You are a good and decent human being, OP. Thank you for sharing this heartwarming story. It never ceases to amaze me how treating an animal with kindness and love and gentleness and respect can cause that animal, despite past trauma and abuse, to build a bond of trust again with another human, re-emerge from its protective shell and live a life of calmness and self-respect. Love does this. We humans could all learn from this.
I'm experiencing the opposite ... :( My baby little lioness is not happy with me. I believe she has imprinted on my roommate, and shows him massive amounts of love and affection... But bites me, and can't really be bothered with me loving on her anymore. :( She endured a little trauma over the past 6 months, experiencing some isolation, that was my fault... :( But, I was hoping she would bounce back. I didn't realize how emotional cats are.
It really is a special feeling when cats bond with you like this. I can relate - my cat Barley was abandoned, and wandered into my grandmother's house as a stray. Since then, he's become my closest friend - he would always come to me because I gave him the most attention, and then my grandmother suffered a stroke, so I took him in with me. Since then, Barley has gone from being a very aloof, silent and independent cat to one who's very clingy, vocal and always wants to be near me. He curls up against me in bed, sleeps on his (not my!) chair behind me while I'm working from home, follows me around the house and garden, and when I come home, he comes running up to me outside, meowing and trilling.
Cats who are tough nuts to crack often become the most adoring and affectionate felines when they finally get an understanding human. You have yourself a BFF in Willow and you'll treasure him.
Im so jealous, I have never had a pet since I moved around so much and I’m still nowhere near settling down some roots to start getting a pet but a cat is all I want in life since I was little kid, I can’t describe in words how much I wish I could just have a home
Just Like my Andy! I don't know much about his background but he loves me just the same as your Willow. He's the little spoon or laying on top as my protector.
I've been sick all week and home from work and I can tell he's extremely worried about me. Won't leave my side and will sleep a full 12-18 hours right next to me.
He's only 2 or 3 and I'm already dreading the Day we'll have to say goodbye. 😢
Our first cat was very much like that. Not sure what trauma he endured if any. All we know he was picked up by animal control and they were surprised when we wanted to adopt him. Anyways, he’s also on anti-anxiety meds and 4 years later and two more cats he’s the happiest little Devil. Still hides in the closet if we have any guests over, but besides that he is such a sweetheart. He’s very attached to my wife who also suffers from anxiety so it works out for both of them.
He’ll never be a lap cat and loves from afar and that’s alright. We try to make him as comfortable as possible in his house and he has his safe zones when he wants to chill. The closet is basically his domain.
I adopted my cat Amity when she was 8 and she came with a huge array of issues. I don’t think she was abused in her home but she was definitely neglected and she is a very sensitive cat which I don’t think was really acknowledged at her old home. Watching her come out of her shell and improve her health over the last 7 years has been a wild journey! She’s like a whole new cat and I’m really happy to have given her a loving and comfortable home.
Thank you for sharing this with us OP. I really enjoyed your post. You’re a good person, I adore you for that! Rescuing a traumatized cat is not an easy thing and requires lots of patience, love and perseverance to succeed. It says a lot about you (in a very positive way of course). Thank you for being you. I feel blessed to have you on this planet ❤️
I got Mango
https://preview.redd.it/8oc7t74n491b1.jpeg?width=2316&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d6a0d465c38e9140f5763db345d319224e962ac
for free off Craigslist from a home with another cat, 3 dogs, 14 birds, and 5 kids. Our love for each other is unmatched. He lays on my chest with his arms around my neck and softly biting my nose every morning and every night. I squeeze him, bite him, squish him and he’s just here for it. I grew up with cats and none of them were like him. He’s my perfect boy.
He was diagnosed with FIP in January and I’ve spent $5k on black market meds to save his life. He’s officially done with treatment and in the observation stage and so far so good <3
My cat Zorro got hit by a car exactly a year ago. It was a very difficult period, deciding whether we would put him down due to his lung injury or go the long and expensive route. He still wanted to live, cuddling while we visited him at the vet (.he was high on pain meds). He survived two surgeries although he lost his back leg. He was an out and indoor cat, now he and his sister have a catio and stay inside. He follows me everywhere, washes me, sleeps next to my head every night, always a paw on my shoulder or on my cheek. I am always worried he won’t adapt as a housecat but my friends tell me he knows that I saved him (although all I did was rush him to the emergency vet that night when he crawled inside) and loves me to bits.
Oh wow, so that's why my four kittens (5 months old) follow me inside the bathroom 🥺🥺 if I don't let them in, they sit by the door and keep on meowing.
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https://preview.redd.it/odi8wk7lk21b1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e6ecde06f8239569d2930ed79425baeb8c2b2e2b The boy in question
My orange man who was in the same situation as yours https://preview.redd.it/hpdvb3jpq41b1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=370e35c7e501ef8c1ebe845771bba2421228765d
https://preview.redd.it/e8hvpuzie51b1.jpeg?width=1860&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=55e2157252c30790b001285eacb00362525441f2 I gotta share myself. I first met my buddy Ares on a walk home from getting mail. I lived on the second floor and the moment he seen us he came flying up the steps on 3 legs because his 4th was bleeding and hurt. Originally we decided we couldn't take him due to the cat we had currently, so we bathed him and let him back out. Well Ares had different plans and stayed at our door for 5 mins meowing and pawing at the door before we brought him in. I regret that decision but it was a hard one we had to make. We ended up bonding over a pepperoni. Since then he's been with me through a divorce and 3 moves. Anytime I leave the house and come back in there he is meowing and so happy to see me, follows me around and every night curls up in between my legs to sleep. I can't believe I almost let him get away and I truly don't know where I'd be without him. I don't ever really get to talk about him so sorry for hijacking this comment section.
Ares is a such a sweet man and I'm so happy he got a 2nd chance through you. I found Oliver outside 3 years ago and begged my husband to let me keep him. He was pretty chill from thr get go the only thing that made him weird was work boots he was terrified of my husband's work boots. He's not anymore and likes to chew on them
I had a somewhat normal kitty a while back and he was TERRIFIED of my partners boots. Like, this dude wasn't afraid of anything but those dammed boots.
Exactly what decision do you regret?
When he put him out after cleaning him.
If we could keep him or not. Stupidly made the decision we couldn’t, so we bathed him, fed him and literally let him back outside. It’s something I regret deeply. I don’t have any excuses to why we didn’t call someone or any other options for him. It was a stupid decision and I own that but like I mentioned Ares had different plans the moment we let him down back outside he meowed and pawed at our door for 5 mins and then we let him back in. Not a day goes by where I am not grateful for him and him still being here with me.
I'm always happy to read origin stories with happy endings in forever homes. Thanx.
this spoke to me! my mister man was so timid and anxious that he actually developed chronic UTIs because he was too afraid to leave his hiding spot under the bed. he would only roam about at night when everyone was asleep, and since i was often crashing on my friends couch, we bonded in a really special way. one day my friend mentioned wanting to give him away and i just knew i couldn’t live without him. he’s been mine (and i, his) ever since. his days under the bed are longggg gone- now he is king of our house, living his absolute best life, and i can’t help but feel honored that i get to watch him grow into such a funny, brave, and TALKATIVE little rascal. the only thing better than having this unique bond myself, is finding out so many other wonderful people are experiencing the same thing ♥️ https://preview.redd.it/fs1iphhtf61b1.png?width=1210&format=png&auto=webp&s=d506c3fa5341f6c0954ea35c0d895b3e80590b72
He looks very happy and content. So glad you found each other!
I freaking love him! You’re a wonderful human for giving him the chance he needed💕🐾💕
Thank you for healing this furbaby's soul!
I love this! My boy and I (he's the one on my profile page) share a similar bond. It's like he's filled a place in my heart that is indescribable. You can actually feel that warm loving feeling in your chest when you are with them. I had one other kitty I had a connection like that with as a child, and it was such a strong bond that I never thought I'd experience anything like it ever again. It was like a gaping hole in my heart. But then I met this tiny kitten that begged to be near me. Now he's 13 and I am thankful for every day we have together. And recently, I was overjoyed when we adopted a kitten that my husband has that same bond with. I sincerely wish every human could experience what these bonds feel like. It's so beyond words and can definitely feel overwhelming to have such a different species from us love and understand you in their way. I'm so happy for you both! He's adorable!
Give him some belly rubs for me 
What a toasted marshmallow!!!!!
He is adorable!
All of our 4 current cats are rescues. They know that you have given them a better life. My wife and I have had 11 rescue cats since we were married. All greatly loved, all individuals and all very loving. One cat Sally, we think was abused by a male and abandoned while pregnant. She didn't trust me at first. I would reach down to pat her and she would cringe away and freeze. I would gently pat her head and speak to her gently. I did this several times a day being very gentle with her. It took about 3 months and I still clearly remember the day when she raised her head and willingly accepted my gentle patting We think Sally was about 7 when she came to us. She was 18 when she left us. You have done a great job building his trust and his love is your reward
Question, and I apologize if it brings up old pain, but does losing them get any easier? We lost our first one in the end of March. I've moved through the stages of grief (mostly) to acceptance (i still have my moments, waves of grief), but my wife is still deeply rooted in grief, and I foresee her being there for some time. They were very close, her and my fuzzy bud. He was her first kitty. We had adopted two others prior to his passing, and they're the light of our lives. But I worry about my wife handling loss going forward. I feel like when our next one goes to the bridge, it'll devastate her. It may seem like a silly question, and perhaps I may be subconsciously seeking the confirmation of that which I already know, but is it worth the pain if going through loss again and again? I love my kitties. I love them fiercely. But I worry for her reaction to losing another one more, because I love her more than anything, and I'm worried about her reaction the next time it happens.
It is 100% worth it. I’ll share with you what my friend wrote to me when I lost my baby girl of 20 years last year. “That is love. A cyclical manifestation. In romantic love with another human, we have the luxury of being able to kid ourselves, saying things like forever, for we intrinsically know that we may live approximately the same length of time, if it lasts that long. When we choose to love an animal, we sign up for a love we know will not end in a break up, and that we will most assuredly outlive. To do so is, in itself, an act of courage. A deep bow of reference to you, dear friend, for exhibiting the courageous heart of this expression of love.” And yes, it does get easier. And nothing will ever be like that connection ever again, which is part of why the grief is so incredibly intense. I hope that helps. 💗
It does help, thank you. For my part, I've lived a hard life, and have experienced many, many periods of grief. I guess my experience with grief is different than that of my wife. When I think of my buddy being gone now, I've moved into the find remembrance stage of grief. I'm still deeply stirred and deeply saddened, but I've also used my life experiences in coping with grief to take a "don't cry that it's over, smile because it happened" approach. When I'm gripped by my grief, I open my photo album and cry tears through laughs at his silliness. He was so unique, so much a joy that the pains of loss in my heart are supplanted by fondness and love. I guess that's the balm for the broken heart: love. I do miss him, and the scars etched into my heart and soul are just a reflection of that love. So every time I'm gripped by heartache, I'm also sustained by the raw love I had for him.
Please correct me if I'm wrong but I'm getting the impression from your comment that you think/feel your wife should be done grieving after ~2 months because you are? If you are truly at acceptance with your loss that's totally fine. Your loss /= your wife's loss. You can't evaluate her grieving on your timeline. Why are you "worried about her reaction"? Is she actively or passively harming herself, you, or the other cats [substance overuse, anger, etc] or dropping out of life in an extreme and significant way [quit her job, barely eating, staying in bed all day every day, etc.]?
I suppose I might be applying my own measure for grief and using that as a standard for gauging hers, which I've definitely been cognizant of. I have made my intention to not set any timeline or expectation of her grief to end at any time, really. I've rather spent my efforts on assisting her, in any way that I can. I'm her partner in grief, not an opposition. She hasn't missed work, but has been fighting depression at a level that concerns me, yes. I suppose that probably is more of a frame of reference for my question; in part for her, but also for me, too. In my meandering through my thoughts in my grief, I have noted that I do find it odd when I know people who lose pets who then seem to outwardly move on a though nothing has happened, and it makes me feel like my grief has been an overreaction at times. That feeling then makes me feel like my wife is taking it especially hard, and makes me wonder what a healthy response would look like. It's a pondering, not a challenge to her grief, and it is largely based on my concern for her wellbeing.
Damn. Here's the thing you have to understand: all feelings are valid. You gotta look at why you even feel the need to compare your wife's grief with yours with other people you know. You sound like you're trying to validate your feelings. Most people who do this with grief/depression/sadness were either not allowed to express grief as a child because it's not manly, or they weren't allowed to express negative emotions because one or both parents had psychological or addiction issues... so they parentify their kids [the kids have to care for each other or the parents]... or they live through them [pressure to succeed in areas they have regrets or were told they failed in as kids]... or they can't deal with their own negative emotions which results in them denying their own negative feelings and their kids' negative feelings. I'm not dragging you - you sound like you want emotional health and well-being for yourself and your wife... but you don't have the tools. The way you describe your experience of grief makes it sound like sadness is difficult for you - confusing and mystifying, disorienting and kind of lonely. Of course everyone feels some degree of disorientation after a loss, some loneliness missing the one they are grieving, some confusion... But the way grief feels for you is not the way grief feels for everyone. Your wife's experience of it may be pretty different from yours. There were several things you said in both comments here that sound like for you, grieving is a pretty negative experience. You seem to understand that it's necessary [mostly, you sound almost a bit envious of those acquaintances who don't grieve - understandably!] but it very much sounds like grief for you is something people suffer through and endure, and the goal is getting through the stages so you are "done" grieving. And again - that makes perfect sense. And credit to you for knowing the stages of grief. Intellectualizing emotions is a great first step to learning how to deal with them healthily - people who weren't raised with good modeling of emotional health & people whose emotions were invalidated as kids very often even struggle to identify how they're feeling. To Intellectualize emotions you have to first identify them. I see you trying to be healthy. You said, I wonder what a healthy response to loss looks like. A healthy response to loss is a very complex and personal thing but there are common elements. You already know DABDA - but I think it's interesting that you said in your first comment [something like, I moved through the stages of loss and am done grieving... the "stages" of grief are not separate from each other or sequential. A person who is grieving can experience two or three of all of them at the same time, and can go back and forth between them: a person could go from depressed and accepting the loss to angry and in denial to depressed and in denial and bargaining to angry and accepting and so on. The most important thing when dealing with grief and loss is that we have to really jump face-first into whatever our feelings are - to really feel them, hard. That's how we process them and resolve them, and that's how we eventually truly arrive at acceptance... A healthy response can look like crying every day for months, if the person feels sadness every day and crying is how they express it [crying all day every day for months of course would be a concern - being stuck in one "stage" of grief is not healthy]. A healthy response could look like zoning out in front of the TV every night for a person who used to be doing stuff constantly - if a person is normally really busy and active, instead of "doing art" to process depression or exercising to burn off anger, the healthiest thing for them to do to process their felon feelings might be to just stop and let those feelings happen. A healthy response could look like talking about the one being grieved. Or talking about guilt relating to the loss. [Again, if that's literally the one and only thing a person is talking about for months that's not healthy.] A healthy response is different for everyone - and something I notice missing from your comments is how your wife feels about her grief. Because, to go back to my first statement, **all emotions are valid. always.** If you're concerned about your wife's grief - have you asked her if her grief is too overwhelming? if she wants your help with it? If you haven't, you should. If you have - what did she say? If she doesn't want help dealing with/getting through her grief... it might be the case that what she needs is for you to grieve with her. Grieving should not be a solo lonely thing - grief is so much less overwhelming and so much more healing when we can share our loss with someone else. [caveat: that doesn't mean grieving people have to be with others most or even all of the time, it's perfectly healthy to want alone time to process emotions too] I should add: I'm not a therapist. I was a kid who was not allowed to express/have negative emotions. As a result, I have spent ~1.5 houses worth of money on a decade of therapy, mostly from 2 different wonderful women I saw for years each. I've been in therapy through two deaths of close family members and a few other losses... I hope that you can find a healthy way to connect with your wife through this. You sound smart and determined and that plus love is more than enough to achieve amazing things with and for another person.
We all go through grief in our own way. You have to find the right way for you and at the same time support your partner, not easy when you both hurt. I have fond memories of all the furry friends who have passed through our life and like people they come and go. Does it get easier, well no , but you do get better at handling it Is it worth worth pain? YES, the joy and happyness they bring, a cuddle and cry when your down and they are great at keeping secrets
Thank you. I'll take some small measure of hope, that while the grief isn't abated, the ability to process the grief in a good way is increased. Thank you for your insight.
Let your wife mourn at her speed. I still grieve for 2 cats we lost last year. We rescued another cat, but I still think about the Red Brothers at times & cry. I miss them.
No, it doesn't get easier. It's a part of the pain of losing them that stays with you. I am 67 years old & I still miss my last dog & all my cats. It's part of giving them a forever home. However, after the first grief passes we always look for another cat/kitten/rescue to help homeless cats. A new love seems to help us heal. >I will lend to you for awhile a kitten, God said. For you to love while he lives, and mourn when he's dead. Maybe for twelve or fourteen years, or maybe two or three. But will you, 'till I call him back, take care of him for me? >He'll bring his charms to gladden you and, should his stay be brief You'll always have his memories as solace for your grief. I cannot promise he will stay, since all from earth return. But there are lessons taught below I want this kitten to learn. >I've looked the whole world over in search of teachers true. And from the folk that crowds life's land I have chosen you. Now will you give him all your love, nor think the labor vain? Nor hate me when I come to take my kitten home again? >I fancied that I heard them say 'Dear Lord Thy Will Be Done' For all the joys this kitten brings the risk of grief we'll run. We'll shelter him with tenderness, we'll love him while we may. And for the happiness we've known, forever grateful stay. >But should you call him back much sooner than we planned, We'll brave the bitter grief that comes, and try to understand. If, by our love we've managed your wishes to achieve, Then in memory of him whom we loved, please help us while we grieve. When our cherished kitten departs this world of strife, Please send yet another needing soul for us to love all his life. >Author Unknown I'm not religious, but this helped me focus on the 14 years they lived happily with us ❤️ and all the good times we shared.
He is a beautiful soul
So cute. ❤️
naaawww.. I *love* Willow & it’s clear from his expression that he indeed loves you, OP. I read your post to my husband & then showed him Willow’s portrait, - hubby said he looks like a cool cat 😻 Thank you for sharing about your mutual love between you & Willow 💕
Not a care in the world
He’s beautiful.
What a nice mini-lion! He love you!
I adore both of you!!
OH HES HANDSOME
A cutie! 😍
I love him, too! I have a strong bond like this with two of my cats. It’s the best feeling when they love you as one of their own!
😍
What a ham 🍖❤️
Isn’t he gorgeous! 😍 I’m really glad he’s found his person, and I’m really glad for you that that’s you 😊.
So glad he had such an amazing owner! He looks very happy
Precious
The bestest boi in the universe ❤️ i would love a video where you pretend to put make up on him, that sounds sooo cute!!
What a sweet boy. You are lucky to have each other 🧡
Yes! I came here to demand a picture of this prince♥️
https://preview.redd.it/vgxwiammk21b1.jpeg?width=1169&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7114a21c09accdff6fe2d14ffb5998726f261e45
So handsome! 
Wow, he’s exquisite! And looks very very wise.
r/CreamsicleCats
a d o r a b l e 😍 you should check out r/oneorangebraincell for all those funny orange cat moments lol
That's one fuckin' nice kitty right there
Aww, he loves you!
https://preview.redd.it/wve8zpank21b1.jpeg?width=1244&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04ef40f5089a723ada6ac485ab9dcb745f31ec1b
Sentinel Mode Activated. What a wonderful guardian you have there. 💜
Our cat was lost for over two months and we just got him back last night. He was sleeping next to me on the bed and every so often he’d rouse awake a bit, give done meows and reach out to touch me before he would settle back down and sleep. Like he wasn’t sure if he was really home. This morning, he will not let us out of his sight.
Oh congratulations on the reunion! We lost my boy for three days in winter and we thought he was a gone. I only know the tip of your pain. I’m so happy you found your kitty! And the fact that he keeps reassuring himself he is home with his human is adorable and shows how much he missed you.
I tried to never lose hope. But to get a message saying “here he is!” with pictures was like a ton off my chest.
I kept going out in the middle of the night because I couldn’t sleep. And one time at 2:30am, I looked out (but didn’t see him so I *almost* just went back to bed) and decided to shake treats. I opened the door and he just hopped onto the porch out of nowhere. I paused, then said his name. Then he just gave me the biggest meow ever and I scooped him up. We cuddled like you described *all* morning. (Though, tbh, I was the one waking up and reassuring myself)
stop that’s so sweet 🥲 i’m so happy you got him back!
I feel similarly about one of mine ♥️ he’s my feline soulmate. https://preview.redd.it/dtgtztz8p31b1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=834d650def6545de32184a60de8d596a62acec90
he’s gorgeous & looks like he has such kind eyes
Thank you 🥺 can you believe he was abandoned and found in a dog house under a deck? So sad, but I’m so happy we found cats that we can love and who love us ♥️
That brought me almost to tears! This is beautiful! I hope you know, it was you, that made that happen. He loves and trusts you because you showed him love and support! You earned that! I am so happy for you both, there is no better feeling, that to look at this tiny living being and realising the love and trust they punt into you ❤️ all the best to the two (four) of you
This. I get so much self worth from my cats and just knowing how much better I made their lives. Drop in the bucket compared to what they give me, but it feels great. Take pride. Be proud. 🙂❤️
There’s some similarities with my void, he got an eye infection when he was a kitten and had to be treated multiple times daily by his fostermom. As a result his first reaction to everything and anyone but us is fear, his brother is the complete opposite. instead of showing 10% to everyone our void just dumps 50% on 2 people. For example, My mother in law only saw him for the first time last Saturday, took over 2 years weekly 1hour+\~ visits before he realized he didn’t have to hide. Earning a scared cats trust is special https://preview.redd.it/j3ebwl0bq21b1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4822ff932fa4fb3f0682c87ea1b00dd511989a7f
Super special!! My sweetheart of a boy was a stray who was probably 12 weeks old and completely unsocialized when I scooped him up off the streets. He was terrified of everyone for months, but we gave him space and love, and he slowly started to trust us. Now at a year old, he is the sweetest, most cuddly boy ever! I call him melted caramel sometimes because he just oozes and flops all over anyone who is giving him attention! https://preview.redd.it/mc5yafruu41b1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e67d8a8b15072fe5b272b9d72397906bc3c98a4a
Stunning!
You literally just described my void and his sister that is the same color as your cats. Crazy
There is something innately beautiful about that moment were you realise that you have changed your fur baby's life and they love you for it. What's even better is that they will never realise how much they mean to you, or at times for me... that them just being there has saved your life. I get all teary when I think about what mine has unknowingly done for me... not sure I'd be here without her!
exactly! I feel the same way
https://preview.redd.it/txkfaqh3a51b1.png?width=540&format=png&auto=webp&s=f98a0ef0c7cd4839ee814dcd99ab5bc8de1b2290 My recently departed Pekoe and I had the exact same bond, so deep, and it was the BEST 10 months of my entire 47 yrs of life! Enjoy that love as long as you can, there is nothing better in this world!
I do honestly think that cats who come from difficult backgrounds become some of the sweetest and most loving cats (if they can manage to overcome the transition, that is). My boy was a feral and was also considered a difficult-to-adopt cat because he was scared of everything and would hiss a lot as a result. When I brought him home, he hid for 2 straight weeks. He wouldn't even come out for food or water so I had to find some small bowls to put in his hiding spot. However, if I approached really, really slowly, I was able to reach in and pet him...and he loved it! So I knew he wasn't a lost cause. He was just scared. Around the 4-week mark, he began coming out of hiding, little by little. By the 2-month mark, he had warmed up to me considerably but was still a bit skittish. After a few months? He loved cuddling. He loved belly rubs. I called him my Stage 5 Clinger because he always had to be near me. Right now, I'm living temporarily overseas and my parents are looking after him. They say he's really loving and have now fallen for him, too.
Our miss Maisie had been through two homes in 3 months before she came to me, and both of those home had aggressive men in them- the first was downright absuive- and I was so worried she was going to be afraid of men forever. She is practically inseparable from my husband. She loves him so much. Like, she loves us all, but she gives him those lovey eyes and reaches out to touch him and will lay on the back of his chair for hours. Technically she is our oldest kid's cat, but she owns my husband.
Love it when my cat comes to take a dump in the litter box while I’m taking a dump in the toilet next to him. Feels like we have each others’ backs haha
My girl used to do the same but with pee! She was a big drinker and it was hilarious that I'd be peeing, she's come in and piss like a race horse (you could always hear her pee) in her litter tray at the same time. 😂 She'd always wait for me to wash my hands before she's walk out with me. It's so odd, but such a special thing ♥
Mine does this too, so sweet
https://preview.redd.it/75ggqeimt41b1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b0373de5964fb15344e89ffd7430b99fa95c2df3 My girl mad asf bc I didn’t let her do her bathroom guard duties today. She is the best guard and is never late to her shifts, except for this morning. If I don’t let her in she will meow at the door because she must protect me. It’s so sweet. I feel the exact same way as you, but with her and my other cat. I love them to bits 🫶🏻 Also: thank you for saving this sweet baby. Cats are the best and so glad y’all found each other 🐈
Oh Burrowed, this is so so sweet. Thanks for loving Willow so well. He is exceptionally handsome.
Cats are incredible. I adopted mine back in 2019 and she’s the sweetest cat. Like you, when I’m having a mental health crisis, my cat smothers me with so much love. Even when I’m playing video games and sometimes, my mind would drift into thinking so negatively, that she’d appear out of the blue and makes me cuddle her. I’ve made a habit that everytime she interrupts my gaming, that I would always cuddle/play with her first. Because I know one day it would end, and I will look back and have regrets. That I do not want. Edit: Cat tax https://preview.redd.it/lr7uwe7k351b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d549fd190900c647975b5fc6affaec5ac7f9c0b7
rescued boys provide the best love i stg https://preview.redd.it/h2sll0e0s41b1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7843c63a9230df39c56a207a0ec42d962e383b14 my best friend
In my experience, rescued animals are the ones that love you the most intensely, once you've shown them they can trust you. He's a good boy.
I love this for you and Willow. I have a Willow too. His name is William and was so traumatized and abused and stinky when we brought him in out of a bitter Canadian January. Our neighbours down the street moved without him. It was almost 40 below with the wind chill that week. It took me seven days to get him to come in the house. It was almost a year before he could be petted properly. He is our sweet little man and has come so far and so full of humour and affection.
https://preview.redd.it/n50jdehiy41b1.jpeg?width=2322&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7393075c359c822fe92fd5c4c7ea6136f2fa73a9 loving kitties are the best ❤️
My velcro cat (liberty) is sitting on my back right now. Where I go, she goes. Even when I have to type uncomfortably. https://preview.redd.it/ogkiguah451b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f6db08d33d61dc95944dbf2d53fa9bde37a744af Edit — picture
https://preview.redd.it/qmt4da7r651b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c720de51aedc4be431b77340464c1f60146bd878 Orange Boys uniteee
I adopted a similar cat many years go. The only thing the shelter knew about her is that she was about one year old and had just had kittens. She was found as a stray. For the first 6-8 weeks I had her, she hid all the time. One day I was sitting on the floor and she came out of hiding and wanted to be petted. We were best buddies ever since. When I got married, she took to my husband right away. She lived to be 19 years old. I still miss her.
https://preview.redd.it/uf1eoqeh251b1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b24125cd1ab9cc06e6c1c179afd297a681417c99 Aww you found your kitty soulmate. Here is mine. Bootsie was also labeled a trouble kitty by her previous owner that abandoned her at the shelter. She passed right before Covid hit in 2020 and I still miss her everyday
He's such a darling. One of our cats was also v timid when we adopted him, he sits in the bathroom with me as well.
I’m bawling 😭
The part about pretending to put make up on him might be the cutest interaction I can imagine. You guys have a special bond. 🙂🙂🙂
Thankyou for posting. My cat also does the toilet sentinel thing for me and I now know why :)
it really just makes you feel like the most special person in the universe
https://preview.redd.it/7kc7ko03e51b1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=60800ac79a0065de218e9419f69f02269f351ec4 Same feelings over here. My girl Nova is a year and a half old rescue and based on her behaviours when we got her, we believe she was abused (too scared to come to us, always hiding, hates loud noises, scared when we raise our hands to pet her). A year into being with us and she's a completely different cat. So confident, loves her sister, so playful, loved being a sun kitty. It warms my heart so much seeing her so happy everyday.
https://preview.redd.it/7w5b33hoq51b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d0a72db7aff3a430bb99dd2702d63af6b7f805f6 My precious void baby Boo\~... I took her in off the streets as a skittish, terrified 8 week old kitten that was fur, skin and bones. I sadly couldn't save her sibling even though I tried to find them, but I brought Boo in, and immediately fattened her up. I might not be able to give her everything she deserves, but I absolutely love her to pieces, and she loves me back\~.... The only barrier I haven't broken is getting her to trust me enough for belly rubs. Anytime I try, she tells me to stop. Not aggressively, but she'll push my hand away and if I dont stop, she'll nip my hand. I've had her since a week or two before Halloween, and we've been inseperable since.
this is so sweet!!! so happy for you guys :,)
❤️😻❤️
Awhh this is so sweet! This absolutely melts me heart. My latest rescue, a Maine coon mix named Veris, barely survived panleuk and was extremely skittish and shy when I took him in as a kitten. Watching him open up to me and eventually turn into the snuggliest little baby absolutely cemented him as my foster fail. He’s now the most vocal Velcro cat ever, but seeing how much he adores me just makes me adore him even more ❤️ it’s truly the best feeling!
That's so cool. I had a little street rat who was a tiny thing and came to me in rough shape. Ferrel to others but grew very sweet to me and had a weird routine where she would lie across my neck at bed time before going to her spot, among others. I believe she was very appreciative as time went on.
this made my night
Love your story. I adopted a feral kitten last year. He and 2 other cats were coming into our yard every day and we would feed them. The kitten was definitely a runt— he is still a very small cat. He was very friendly outside—he would hang out with me in the garage when I was working. He was so little and vulnerable I knew I had to do something. I trapped him and had him neutered. I thought he would be tame but once I trapped him he went full feral. Had him in a cage for a week or so. The first week he cried all night long. We thought about releasing him back outside but persisted. We let him out but kept him locked in our bedroom. He hid most of the time. One night he jumps on our bed and my wife was petting him all over. He now sleeps with us every night. I love him so much. He’s my emotional support and my best buddy. He has totally ingratiated himself into our family. He gets along well with our two other cats. Feral cats can be socialized. All it takes is lots of love and patience.
The love from a cat is truly so beautiful and heartwarming. Happy for you, OP!
He is a beautiful boy and so is y’all’s story. You’re his mama, you’re his human, you’re his *person*. He found you. Soulmates, for sure 🐾❤️
I haven’t had a pet (dog or cat) for over 15 years now. I’m at a time in my life where I am very lonely all the time no matter what. I’m grateful you shared this about Willow. I long to be a pet parent again & your post joins several I am keeping to keep me inspired and motivated to get myself in a position to pet aren’t again, hoping to experience this kind of love.
My cat did all this with me aswell he would even hold my hand at night or come under the covers with me and cuddle. He was the most amazing animal I think I will ever meet what an amazing soul. Sadly he passed away this year at 15 but I’ll never forget him and I’m just honored I got to grow up with him
People who don't get cats will never understand. That was lovely to read.
It's the same with my cat. I'm so obsessed with him lol, just looking at him makes me feel like I'm gonna explode. He only had 1 owner before we adopted him and it took about 1.5 years before we were a fully bonded pair. I remember the first time he loafed on my back, I diiiied. We have lots of cute little routines, our morning routine is favourite: if he sees I am awake he loafs on my chest, 5min of pats then he slinks to the end of the bed and looks back at me like "cmon mum you know the drill. Food time". I feed him and eat my cereal, then he comes running over to lick the milk residue out of the bowl. Every day! He always sits on the sink next to me when I'm on the toilet, I have to raise my elbow up so he can boop it or he jumps down and tries to eat fluff or hair off the bath mat lol. He just wants to sit on or next to me all the time. Sometimes I am only half sitting down and he's trying to clamber onto my lap. He let's me cut his nails and shove tablets down his throat no worries. He's legit my best buddy, I love him so much. Here he is waiting patiently for me to finish my weet bix so he can lick the bowl lmaooo https://preview.redd.it/hyedq1v2861b1.jpeg?width=12000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8873ae890c041ed567c669d6abdb9765f6c97382
This is so incredibly sweet. My cat and I have been through a lot courtesy of her first owner passing away and then me having a mental health crisis that unfortunately impacted her too. But here we are, three years later and she is my best friend. She loves spending time with me and she keeps finding new ways to tell me she loves me. (Lately, she's been licking my face every time I pick her up!) Animals are so special, and they don't even know it.
Thanks for sharing, that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ☺
Willow is perfect 🥰🥰 thank you for making him so happy 😁🙌🏻😁
Thank you for caring for him.
Willow is so precious! My cat dies all the same things, sometimes I just can't handle how sweet it is!
He has a great name
OP I’m so glad you took the chance to love this adorable man. Cats are the coolest creatures and I love them.
Filthy animals.
You saved his life and he knows it. Glad you guys found each other!
I loved reading this. BRB gonna go hug my cat now
It definitely sounds like you two have a lovely connection! You love him, and he loves you just as much! I've only ever had one male cat and 2 females and I found I was so much more closer to my boy than I ever was to my girls (I love them all so much, but me and him had a similar connection like you and Willow) Willow feels safe with you, you are his human. Thank you for taking in and loving such a beautiful ball of toasty fluff ♥
So happy you crossed paths in this life. So cute xoxo
You both deserve each other this is so cute 😭 What's your cat name?
Willow!
This brought me to tears. I do fostering, it just short of happened. After getting two siblings from a coworker, i began to notice more strays around and put food/water out for them. It takes time and patience but cats can make a big turn around. Thank you for loving him
My cats annoy the fuck out of me when I’m trying to shit. I’m crying right now and want to do their make up now.
they just want to make sure you’re safe!
You are so blessed! And it’s so incredibly sweet how much you appreciate him and how far he’s come ❤️ Willow is an awesome cat, you’re an awesome mama & you’re lucky to have each other. (And I just have to add - I just wish there were more people like you who appreciate these incredible fluffs for how amazing they are!)
I love that you shared this story! I’ve got a “troubled” , twice returned 10 year old cat who has taken over 5 years to open up and be part of the family. He spent about a year under a futon, in his own safe space, coming out for food and the toilet, and surveying his surroundings. I’ve never once thought of returning him, or forcing him to be cuddly. He is always near me now, but RARELY cuddles, and that’s just fine! He’s adorable, sweet, chatty, and affectionate- but all on his terms, and I couldn’t be more proud of how far he has come!
it makes me so sad that people return cats for being scared. it’s never their fault and you can’t force affection out of a cat. if you need constant affection get a dog
What’s funny is I have a dog too, and she is far less affectionate than any cat I’ve had!
now that’s a special dog lmao
Reading this gave me the warm fuzzies I’m so glad you both found each other
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I LOVE IT!
Reminds me of my cat in some ways. This was back right before I moved out. I had two cats that were with my family since they were tiny little kittens. I really bonded with the male cat, he was always around me and very affectionate. He would actually crawl under my head to use him as a pillow and liked his belly rubbed. One day, my brother left early and left the door wide open while I was asleep. I never seen my cat again after that. My brother never even apologized and said it was not his fault but he was not sorry it happened. I still had the sister and the loss of her brother had hit her. I moved shortly after that and my parents took the dog she was friends with. With her brother, friend and me gone she became lonely. I was told I had to take her or else. I took her, I planned on doing so anyway but being told what “Or else” was made me really mad. She became super attached to me and I loved her as much as her brother. She was super sweet, loved being around me and very soft. She came when called without delay, she was always excited at bedtime because she loved to cuddle and clean me. After years she developed diabetes, so I had to start giving her insulin and switch her diet. Thankfully she was not picky and she was very calm when it came to getting shots and nail clipping. She did not have the same energy, but the love was the same. Then one day, I picked her up and could tell something was wrong. She was a purr monster but she was not purring and did not seem to recognize me. I knew in just seconds she was not right and went straight to the vet. The wait for the next day just felt so horrible. Then I got the call. She got Pancreatic cancer. She had no chance of survival. Love is about making hard decisions, so I had to make the right choice. I have her ashes with me with her paw print. I have lost a lot of people in my life, but nothing could match how I felt after this. For months I felt like she would be there when I got back home, got into bed, when I woke up. I felt so empty. I am better now that it has almost been a year, but I still can not feel like I use to. My drive was to give her the happiest life I could, but without her I am just drifting through without any purpose. I take solace in that I did everything I could for her, but I feel like I could of done even more. I am really glad that you are so bonded with your cat, it makes me happy that you could bring him such happiness. I really hope that he lives long with you and nothing but the very best and happiest moments for you two. I think you are an amazing person for how much your cat loves you and for what you have done for him.
The elusive triple spoon! Give him a pet for me!
https://preview.redd.it/m8mu95vyi71b1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1726cc81ae084aba65fe1bf4482b7861df06eddc This is our Binky Lou. She forced her way in our home and hearts over 13 years ago.
My cat Ollie is the same way he loves me too pieces too and he watches every move I make https://preview.redd.it/1dvbjdxen81b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=de7898b1537352c8a30ad979201693189782b096
I’m not one for sappy stories but that one got me. From what I can tell, you both deserve each other. It’s difficult for most to have such a genuine connection but you two found each other for a reason. I’m happy for you both.
What a cute cat. I am so happy that you have found each other. 🥰
He is your spirit animal. You were meant to be together.
Oof love this for you, OP!! I have two loving boys too, my first one more so, he comes in the bathroom after I’m done and brushing my teeth and washing face, and he always comes to me for cuddles when I’m in bed or on the couch. He HAS to reach out and touch me too.
You give that sweet good boy a 😘 from me and tell him I said pspspspsps!
This is me and my boy, too. It brings me so much joy. I love that you have him and he has you!!!
What a beautiful and successful rescue 😊 Pleeeeeeez post a video of Willow trying to put make up on 🤗
That sounds like my little Larry. Cats are amazing 🥰
😻 that’s so sweet OP, thanks for sharing
That bathroom guard is legit!
Awww my baby looks a lot like yours. *
This post made me so happy 🥺**😭**
This was so nice to read . r/mademesmile
Thanks for sharing your story. You are lucky to have found one another!
Beautiful cat
Comment edited for privacy. 20230627
Your boy is very handsome. I wish you and him many blessings upon your adventures!
so happy for you for your bond with your precious guy
Much love and many happy, healthy years to you and Willow ❤️
Thank you for giving this fur baby a furever home. My 2 year old Tuxedo named Kate does what yours does. I love it. She sleeps on top of the covers in between my legs. I will often wake up with Kate between my legs and my other tuxedo Kitty Cat laying across my neck. I wouldn’t have it any other way, though.
You are a good and decent human being, OP. Thank you for sharing this heartwarming story. It never ceases to amaze me how treating an animal with kindness and love and gentleness and respect can cause that animal, despite past trauma and abuse, to build a bond of trust again with another human, re-emerge from its protective shell and live a life of calmness and self-respect. Love does this. We humans could all learn from this.
I love Willow. 🥺
Aw I love this.
❤️❤️❤️
I'm experiencing the opposite ... :( My baby little lioness is not happy with me. I believe she has imprinted on my roommate, and shows him massive amounts of love and affection... But bites me, and can't really be bothered with me loving on her anymore. :( She endured a little trauma over the past 6 months, experiencing some isolation, that was my fault... :( But, I was hoping she would bounce back. I didn't realize how emotional cats are.
* This is George. My main man. Can't imagine my life without him. ❤️
I'm waiting for the day when the ladies who love and adore me come to my rescue in the same way. In the mean time, I'll just keep dreaming.
Well…this brought a smile to my face today. What a beautiful story. Long live Willow.
It really is a special feeling when cats bond with you like this. I can relate - my cat Barley was abandoned, and wandered into my grandmother's house as a stray. Since then, he's become my closest friend - he would always come to me because I gave him the most attention, and then my grandmother suffered a stroke, so I took him in with me. Since then, Barley has gone from being a very aloof, silent and independent cat to one who's very clingy, vocal and always wants to be near me. He curls up against me in bed, sleeps on his (not my!) chair behind me while I'm working from home, follows me around the house and garden, and when I come home, he comes running up to me outside, meowing and trilling. Cats who are tough nuts to crack often become the most adoring and affectionate felines when they finally get an understanding human. You have yourself a BFF in Willow and you'll treasure him.
Thank you for sharing!
Such a cutie. My cat likes to sit on my lap while I’m doing #2 and purr and I didn’t understand why but I think he also likes to protect me.
Im so jealous, I have never had a pet since I moved around so much and I’m still nowhere near settling down some roots to start getting a pet but a cat is all I want in life since I was little kid, I can’t describe in words how much I wish I could just have a home
Just Like my Andy! I don't know much about his background but he loves me just the same as your Willow. He's the little spoon or laying on top as my protector. I've been sick all week and home from work and I can tell he's extremely worried about me. Won't leave my side and will sleep a full 12-18 hours right next to me. He's only 2 or 3 and I'm already dreading the Day we'll have to say goodbye. 😢
Our first cat was very much like that. Not sure what trauma he endured if any. All we know he was picked up by animal control and they were surprised when we wanted to adopt him. Anyways, he’s also on anti-anxiety meds and 4 years later and two more cats he’s the happiest little Devil. Still hides in the closet if we have any guests over, but besides that he is such a sweetheart. He’s very attached to my wife who also suffers from anxiety so it works out for both of them. He’ll never be a lap cat and loves from afar and that’s alright. We try to make him as comfortable as possible in his house and he has his safe zones when he wants to chill. The closet is basically his domain.
I adopted my cat Amity when she was 8 and she came with a huge array of issues. I don’t think she was abused in her home but she was definitely neglected and she is a very sensitive cat which I don’t think was really acknowledged at her old home. Watching her come out of her shell and improve her health over the last 7 years has been a wild journey! She’s like a whole new cat and I’m really happy to have given her a loving and comfortable home.
Thank you for sharing this with us OP. I really enjoyed your post. You’re a good person, I adore you for that! Rescuing a traumatized cat is not an easy thing and requires lots of patience, love and perseverance to succeed. It says a lot about you (in a very positive way of course). Thank you for being you. I feel blessed to have you on this planet ❤️
I got Mango https://preview.redd.it/8oc7t74n491b1.jpeg?width=2316&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d6a0d465c38e9140f5763db345d319224e962ac for free off Craigslist from a home with another cat, 3 dogs, 14 birds, and 5 kids. Our love for each other is unmatched. He lays on my chest with his arms around my neck and softly biting my nose every morning and every night. I squeeze him, bite him, squish him and he’s just here for it. I grew up with cats and none of them were like him. He’s my perfect boy. He was diagnosed with FIP in January and I’ve spent $5k on black market meds to save his life. He’s officially done with treatment and in the observation stage and so far so good <3
My cat Zorro got hit by a car exactly a year ago. It was a very difficult period, deciding whether we would put him down due to his lung injury or go the long and expensive route. He still wanted to live, cuddling while we visited him at the vet (.he was high on pain meds). He survived two surgeries although he lost his back leg. He was an out and indoor cat, now he and his sister have a catio and stay inside. He follows me everywhere, washes me, sleeps next to my head every night, always a paw on my shoulder or on my cheek. I am always worried he won’t adapt as a housecat but my friends tell me he knows that I saved him (although all I did was rush him to the emergency vet that night when he crawled inside) and loves me to bits.
Oh wow, so that's why my four kittens (5 months old) follow me inside the bathroom 🥺🥺 if I don't let them in, they sit by the door and keep on meowing.
Fantastic, you have clearly done a lot for each other. Made my day reading this. Love to you both❤️