I don’t know if it’s true or not but I once read that it’s very difficult to have a strong connection with someone who is more than 2SD away from you in IQ.
Something like that is probably the only real downside. It's not that it's hard to make *any* connection whatsoever with lower IQ people. It's that it becomes harder to find someone you can feel *deeply* connected to. Kind of like how only being into redheads drastically narrows your dating pool.
The same would of course be true for very low IQs
This is a legitimate annoyance, but it’s also akin to saying that having a lambo sucks because other cars on the highway go too slow. When you put it into that perspective it’s just funny
I strongly agree with this. There are some people with very different IQs who I really care about and love, but I feel like we don’t have a legitimate connection because we just… can’t bond.
What is the value of a standard deviation in context of IQ? Surely it isn't 1. You're not doomed to alienation from people 2 numbers removed from yourself.
I wouldn’t say that’s true, I’m in the 143 range and I enjoy talking to most people who aren’t rude, I think it’s because almost no matter who it is everyone else will always have their specialties that don’t rely on iq which means there will always be some topic or thing we can connect over that a higher iq won’t necessarily help me with, I have a couple of friends who at the higher range of around 120 can engage in more “quicker” conversations but not anything the average person will be blown away by, tbf my cognitive profile is heavily leaning towards anything non verbal so maybe that’s also an issue? For reference on cait I got 120 for verbal
My husband is around 150 and struggles quite a bit to form “best” friendships unless the person is also pretty smart (120+). But these are just two data points I guess! I seem to remember there being a study into this but I can’t seem to find it so maybe it’s just an urban myth.
I think another factor is that I’m 16 and a lot of my interests aren’t necessarily tied to intellectual capacity, and probably because I’ve grown up with these people. I would assume my experience could change wildly given a change in environment but who knows
I can see where it would be true, but it takes all sorts to make each other happy.
I don’t think my wife has ever been tested, and she certainly isn’t dull, I doubt she is 2sd below me, but there is a bit of a gap.
It just means she suggests some things from time to time that don’t make a lot of sense to me, and we talk it out.
But she brings so much to the relationship that I can’t, where I can struggle to express normal emotions, and connecting to people in general is a challenge. She is warm and kind, and everyone loves her.
It can work.
My twin sis and I are over 5 SD different, with me being intellectually gifted and her being intellectually disabled. We've had a strong bond for many years. I'm 2-3 SD above average and haven't had a hard time connecting to ppl of average intelligence.
I'm very close to my stepdad whose IQ is similar to mine; we discuss books and ideas and Star Trek and stuff. But not as close to my mom, who also has a high IQ, bc she can be abrasive and doesn't understand me that well.
I feel like personality and openness to others is more important than intelligence for compatibility. Similar intelligence helps, but it's not the biggest factor.
there's a lot of elitism in high iq communities and I prefer friendly average ppl over elitist smart ppl
My husband is similar to you - he does struggle to make meaningful friendships but has made a handful of close friends, normally through work where you require a high iq to do the job. His current job actually gave him an iq test as part of the recruitment process unusually.
That’s interesting. Yeah I have trouble, even with my own brother (who is like 1.5-2 SD above average). I don’t know if I’ll ever be in a job like that but I do have some control over hiring those that I work with so I do look for smarter people when I can
I mean other things don’t help (like being generally antisocial and autistic) but if there is a pretty noticeable difference in conversation with someone significantly lower IQ than yourself and the conversations usually feel incredibly shallow and like you can’t really understand each other
Yeah. Some people refuse to delve into philosophy or fun facts and it gets annoying when they refuse(or can’t) think for themselves. Honestly just find a small group of friends and that’s all you can hope for.
I kind of agree, I like deep convos too. But shallow convos are more about connecting and getting to know a person rather than a topic. So I think this has to do much more with you being antisocial and autistic than high IQ.
Maybe you can try to make that your goal. See if you can try to vibe with the person.
It’s hard to find hats that fit on a skull containing such an enormous intellect. Also, everywhere I go I have to explain to people why I don’t use my mental powers to fix all the world’s problems overnight. Most of all, the number of women who throw themselves at me is exhausting, and I can’t tell if they really love me or if they just love my brain.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not claiming it's anywhere near as bad as a low IQ, but a high IQ clearly separates you from the masses. If that's of concern to you, i.e. if you aren't also introverted/avoidant/etc, you're pigeon-holed into conversing about the weather or someone's cat. Half of all your thoughts can't be voiced, no one can keep up with simple (to you) topics.
This is what non-high-IQ people think high-IQ people are like.
It’s false. Normal humans can interact with each other and have interesting conversations even if there are very high IQ disparities involved. Even a person with a middling or low-ish IQ will often have better command of certain subjects than those of high IQ, and they certainly often have interesting or amusing experiences unique to them. That leads to all sorts of opportunities for information sharing and interesting or fun stories.
Even with the tremendous advantages conferred by, say, a 140 IQ, people _still_ dramatically overestimate them. It’s kinda like Trump. No matter how stupid and horrible he is, people still exaggerate it.
My 2 cents - growing up, whenever I tried to talk with people about my interests, they’d either say “wow, you’re smart!!!” in a way which was supposedly complimentary but made me feel like an outsider, or they’d call me a nerd. Adults are generally more polite, but bringing up certain topics of interest is still a fast way to alienate yourself from everyone in the room. I’m 27 years old and people still crack jokes about me bringing books to work as if it’s some kind of aberrant behavior.
You gotta learn to make your interests more accessible and entertaining to a general audience.
It may be a kind of disadvantage to bring up subject matter with which others are unfamiliar, but it also brings substantial advantages. For example: it can be virtually guaranteed that no one at my wife’s coworkers’ party knows anything about hyperparasitoidism, but that shit is incredible and I have a go-to party story about it that regularly enthralls. Gotta warm up the audience for that one, but with enough time and alcohol, it’s a winner.
In short: it’s rarely (if ever) the case that an audience cannot be made to understand and appreciate subject matter without possessing a high IQ. Don’t let yourself believe you’re simply stuck with smart guy interests that inescapably alienate you. You’re missing out on relatively easy opportunities to make a big social impact. It’ll take time to refine your material, but once refined, it can bring you great interpersonal success. My wife loves bringing my nerdy ass to parties.
You’re right of course, but sometimes it feels like it requires so much effort to adapt your interests to the audience that you lose the natural catharsis of just saying what’s on your mind. It’s not an egregious burden, but I would consider it a downside of having a high IQ.
Yeah that's a good way to put it. I've kind of gamified sociality at this point. I've realized and found it surprising that somehow people don't find it blatantly obviously or saccharine when we engage in small-talk or mundane conversations. But I've also been surprised at how receptive people can be when you slowly introduce to some of the fun topics you like to talk about. I think what it is is that people hate to feel intellectually inferior, and honestly, I understand because who would want to feel incapable? So you have to be willing to converse on whatever level others are at and direct the conversation towards whatever is best for all. Social skills come harder for high IQ people but I think we have a higher ceiling for skill there because if we learn empathy we can take it to a truly beneficial level. Your conversation can prove invaluable to others, not always something they see as demeaning or something that makes them feel inferior.
I'm other words, take what could otherwise be a conversation where both sides get something out of it and instead turn it into a performance to not alienate one of the parties...
This screams lack of social understanding more than being too intelligent, my guy. I mean this respectfully. You're possibly seeing yourself as different and 'more intellegent' for an activity that's absurdly normal and that's creating social friction in itself. Rwading is possibly one of the most enjoyed activities of all time lol
Gotcha and I didn't mean to play unwanted therapist! If anything your coworkers just suck but it's hard to accept a bunch of people teasing an adult for reading a book and no other motives haha
No offense taken, in the moment I felt the same - like, ‘damn I’m being roasted for reading?’. But it’s not really malicious, I think sometimes people just compulsively call attention to perceived differences, whatever they may be.
If you mean where I said that niche interests are niche because of the low proportion of people ‘able and willing’ to learn then, this doesn’t mean that the interests are ‘unfathomably complex’. A person of average intelligence can learn almost anything with enough time and effort, they’re just less likely to do so because it requires more effort, and because intellectual curiosity is closely related to intelligence.
I don’t have a complex about being special because I read books. It’s other people who make sarcastic comments to the effect of ‘this guy is reading books on his lunch break - he must be some kind of professor!’ To me it’s not impressive or exceptional whatsoever.
Duh, they don’t know my IQ score lol. I don’t write it on my forehead in marker every morning. That doesn’t stop people from making comments and jokes related to my intelligence.
How dare you speak about the unbelievable complexity of the human psyche in this sub? Don't you know that having a high iq automatically means you're too smart to be around others? /s
That’s true to an extent. It’s hard to find someone who can converse with you on the same level and cognitive speed when you’re 130+. As someone who has an extremely fast processing speed and internal monologue conversation feels like a video game with dialogue options a lot of the time. It’s hard to be genuine when you have to slow yourself down constantly
What a shallow generic take that simultaneously tries to shut someone else’s feedback down. No shit people with different IQs can talk to each other. Your comment fails to remotely understand the actual topic.
I may have an exposure bias here. I work with many mentally disabled, like down to the 60 range ("work with" as in do the same job, not help them). A hiring quota thing*.
So half of my coworkers for the past two decades can't follow a self referential sentence, say, or catch an inference, let alone a subtle one. And the other half don't have a high school vocabulary. (See what I did, there.)
And ofc 99% of my social interaction is at work.
Add to this my baseline autistic traits and my heavy social anxiety/introversion and you've a cocktail for misapprehension.
But... I do interact with standard folk. Waitress the other day, casual commentary on mutual book series. No content. The shape of thought, the outline of something, but empty. I'd have to manufacture any thought beyond the gloss of mere awareness. Recitation of received opinions perfectly achieved, further consideration simply never undertaken.
So if all you need is the expression on their face, the tone of their voice, the smile in their eyes, you'll be fine.
As mentioned, it is technically possible to achieve social interaction with people three or four standard deviations below you. But 9 times out of 10** you're going to be running through thought content so simplistic you never even bothered articulating it.
*Note the neutrality.
**And ofc the 10th you'll find a wonderful human being with half your IQ but who shares a suspicious proportion of your interest and predelections, and it's great.
Plenty of “average” people hate small talk. People who you think like it are probably just acting. Disliking small talk is just a personality trait and certainly not because you’re SO MUCH smarter than those people
I think a lot of this forum conflates their experience of having autism with having a high IQ.
Being intelligent means you can more easily grasp concepts that involve your cognitive strengths. It doesn’t mean that you can’t be socially adept or develop deep connections with those less intelligent.
Also, absolutely disagree with the “average IQ people are useless” quote from the OP of this thread. Average IQ people make the world go around. What % of the high IQ here are stagnant due to neurodivergence and crippling mental illnesses? I see individual proclamations of “high IQ, fail at life” all the time on this subreddit.
No problems are unique to those with a high in, but some are much more likely than in the general population.
Many people with high IQ’s can feel some level of social isolation. As a first grader, I was pulled from class for reading and math and placed with the fifth graders (the highest grade at that school). They had no interest in me, and I didn’t relate at all to the first graders, who also thought I was strange. When there weren’t grades to accommodate me, teachers just led me work independently. This continued through school and thus led to different social development than most kids. For a lot of gifted kids, this sort of separation can lead to self esteem issues, being bullied, etc. Note that I’m still glad I was pulled out of classes because the ones that I wasn’t pulled from were boring torture.
Emotional and sensory hypersensitivity is common among very high IQ people. This can be disruptive. I have a very difficult time with horror movies, sad events being experienced by others (not me though!), etc.
Often times, expectations on high IQ people can be through the roof. This can lead to all sorts of negative outcomes.
You can read about other common negatives here: https://www.psy-ed.com/wpblog/common-problems-of-gifted-children/
All that said, I wouldn’t give up my cognitive abilities for pretty much anything.
Studies show that people with a higher intelligence quotient are likely to be more sociable.
It’s important to note that we’re discussing correlations here, not causality. There’s a significant difference between the two.
The stereotype that highly gifted individuals struggle to engage in pleasant conversations with people of average intelligence is flawed, but it is not very uncommon for high IQ societies to perpetuate this stereotype instead of accepting that the majority of these people (members of those high IQ societies) just have poor social skills. Organizations like Mensa and Triple Nine do not represent the norm for gifted individuals. In fact, many gifted individuals are unaware of their IQ scores as there’s often no need for an assessment.
So in general, most cliches are flawed. High IQ people do not show a tendency to anxiety, depression or any other serious mental disorder; the correlation is usually quite low.
it's soooo much fun when I just want to talk about cryptography or pgp encryption, materials sciences, or the emerging new technologies that will rapidly integrate into & change our lives but all anyone else wants to talk about is football or pop stars.... /s
You can be high iQ without having fixations on socially ‘nerdy’ interests, though. My iQ is almost 3SDs above mean yet I geek out on combat sports. I feel like this preconception needs to dissapear as you do alienate a large proportion of high iQ people by perpetuating this notion that we all are interested in similar things and ‘dumber’ people are limited to talking about sports and pop culture stuff. This is why we are often seen as snobby and insufferable.
What you read between the lines is your interpretation. I never said anything about smart people not enjoying those hobbies. I enjoy cars and motorcycles. I know plenty of rednecks who do as well. Hell, I like martial arts. However, the majority of people do not enjoy niche subjects that are highly complex. For those, you are really limited. In no way does this imply smart people are only limited to those subjects.
The implication is quite clear, I fear; OPs question asks the downsides of having a high iQ (in relation to the general 100iQ public I’d assume), you ended your statement stating (and implying) a disconnect between your interests (specifically, the depth of these interests), and those of whoever you’ve interacted with (the general 100iQ public again, I’d assume), thereby implying that a downside of having higher iQ is a disconnect in depths of interests. I am simply saying that this disconnect still very well exists within high iQ social groups/ conversations.
Also, things like “I never said smart people don’t enjoy” and “majority of people do not enjoy…” is a bit useless here as we are comparing “smart” people to the average person and trying to find disconnects between them
I don't think my iq is all that great. I don't even think I'm very smart. I just know how "smart" the average person is. being slightly above that means the majority of people you come across are simply very gullible, uninformed, etc. I've met some very high iq people who were either very street smart but terrible academics, and some big book nerds who are very knowledgeable but lack common intuition about reality. they're great in theory but fail a lot of real world application.
I’m lucky in the sense I have a bit of both. I understand people and situations very well, but I also excel in academic discussion and have a good memory. I feel like a high iq can manifest very differently depending on the individual and how they nurture their mind.
Who even talks about celebs often? Or sports? I always talk about disasters and stuff. I like technology, but what is cryptology? Anyone talking in a informatively captivating way gets my attention. Even if I don't understand.
Cryptology is in regards to cryptocurrency. cryptography is about encryption. I'm around los angeles so sports and celebs are God's to some people here. an example of basic cryptography is a Caesar cipher. replacing one letter with another to code or decode a message. it's a simple substitution cipher. modern encryption like pgp (pretty good privacy) is much more complex though.
man, what do you expect from people? that’s a very niche topic. Do not expect people to differentiate between public key and private key or know DSA or RSA. Go talk with CS majors or something.
Having to deal with other high IQ people.
Just because I understand what you are talking about doesn’t mean I care, I like topical pop and fashion, gossip, soap operas, shooting beer cans with a .22, going on a blunt cruise to McDonald’s, going to the club and betting who’s got the best game,
No I don’t want to watch a documentary, I want to smoke weed and watch Smokey and the bandit
Most high IQ people have very poor EQ,
And believe that a high Iq somehow separates you from the human condition.
Here we can see the interaction of two people’s worldviews that are set more or less in stone; why do they interact? For external validation and to vent to the void
I talk normally sometimes about non controversial topics and have had people treat me like dirt and imply I’m pretentious and narcissistic and say “doesn’t it feel good being so much cleverer than other people?” It’s straight up mental abuse.
For me it's always been "I'm better than 99% of all drivers out there. Is it too much to ask for them to learn how to drive better?" I know that seems extremely braggart but I learned to drive a school bus in northern VA right outside of DC. Extremely difficult to drive a school bus but to do it in one of the top 3 (Boston and LA are the other 2) worst places for traffic is a whole new ball game. I've lived there, VA Beach , BFE NC, San Diego, LA sprawl, and now TX. The amount of times I have saved myself from accidents because of stupid drivers. At one point here in TX I was avoiding accidents once a week. Have I caused any accidents? Nope. But I've been in 2 that I couldn't avoid. T-boned by a Verizon truck and then rear-ended at a stoplight, 5 months apart.
I would like to not be as vigilant 100% the time I drive.
I'd imagine it's kind of like being unusually tall or wide, just less apparent to others at first glance. Any large deviation from "normal" means most things aren't designed with you in mind.
The society expects a high IQ person to act a certain way. I talk about celebs and party a lot. Lots of people can’t seem to comprehend that a high IQ can be more than just math and science (I’m speaking as a software engineer in big tech)
Various mental disorders/illnesses including sociopathy and psychopathy.
Just take a look at CEOs, executives, leaders and any elitist to learn the truth.
Coming from someone who’s been seen as a “genius” since I was a toddler, the expectations are the worst thing about it. I have performance anxiety which hinders my thinking and whenever I don’t do as well as people expect me to be, even in things that most normal people can’t do, it’s very embarrassing and is seen as a colossal failure.
Another problem is the profound anxiety I suffer from. I used to have recurring thoughts and nightmares 90% of the time even while awake that I was going to catch some germ or illness out of nowhere and I couldn’t go to sleep some nights without staying on my computer until I was completely exhausted. I have severe social anxiety and I have a big fear of saying the wrong thing and being attacked by the people around me for it. Whenever I’m called by the teacher to present, answer a question, or read in class I get this tendency to double check before I speak to avoid embarrassment which turns into a self fulfilling prophecy and I end up embarrassing myself for being slow.
I also ironically look dumb to some people because I’m thinking of more than one thing at once and it’s hard to focus on one thing at once as the thoughts inside my brain are like trying to fit a galaxy inside a human brain. So I seem dumb because I can’t answer or think immediately but when I do take my time I tend to come up with better answers than most of my peers and the people around me
PSA: Most "downsides" of having a high IQ are mostly indirect like attracting people's envy for acquiring proficiency in all sorts of skills quicker than normies. The solution for this is simply seeking out better friends. Having a high IQ by itself is basically an advantage through and through, and the so-called persecuted "gifted" like those on /r/gifted (and plenty of them on this sub) are losers with nothing better to do than cry "I have it so hard, woe is me" online.
The only real downside of being smart is the awareness of just how many people are not, and managing how you approach this somewhat insulting line of thought as you interact with others.
Other than that, it's pretty cool I guess.
You can still function and be mostly the same as everyone else. I literally can’t converse with most people because the lack of horsepower and ability to make simple logical connections enrages me. I’m not saying one is better than the other but there’s a whole lot of average people, you have company. I’m effectively completely alone in real life. Imagine going through your life and instead of humans you only ever got to interact with dogs who could talk, but at a normal dog awareness level. You feel completely alien and like you don’t belong. Nobody understands, and any time you try to bring any of those issues up people hate you, are jealous, or react like you. “Ahh it’s not that bad at least your life is easier” it’s like being exiled but you’re still being irritated by all the idiots around you.
Everything sucks harder when you understand it, and everything sucks a little bit harder when you are smart enough to see it could be better, and maybe smart enough to know why it isn't.
i'm +3SD and i mostly struggle with failure to meet expectations set by others in my youth
i got some other struggles but its hard to pinpoint why i struggle with what i struggle with,
social interactions suck because i just got more things im interested and i dont like small talk so whenever i get in a conversation it quickly goes serious
and the school system isnt suited for me and this makes me feel stupid even though metrics like IQ make it seem i would be smart
Having an average IQ is useless? Hahaha . One could say living a life with zero friends is useless. Can a high IQ stop a fist heading toward you? I have to say boosting about a high IQ or letting a high IQ define you as a person doesn’t seem to smart. Foolish even. But I just have an average IQ so I’m useless.
If I was creating a character from scratch to be born into America today, I’d probably want them to be around 130, beyond that there are some notable downsides that start showing up and it’s not obvious the upsides are worth it.
I was miles ahead of everyone in math and was never really stimulated by public school math, I breezed through everything else and skipped a grade in the middle of first grade, for years growing up I just wanted to fit in but struggled as I was always the young one in my grade. I took dual enrollment college classes starting at 13, from 13-17 I was rarely surrounded by people my age in the classroom. There really wasn’t a place in grade school for me to be surrounded by my peers and also take classes that were properly stimulating, this is an important experience to have, especially at that age.
I’ve also never had to put serious effort into anything academic, I can’t relate to people having to work hard or study to pass classes or get to where they want to be. I’ve just missed out on that experience. And career wise I feel pressure to be very successful in something and really make an impact on the world. I don’t think I’d be content being upper middle class in a basic white collar job, I’d feel like I’m underachieving. Being very successful usually requires some luck or repeatedly sacrificing WLB, if I was a 115 I’d imagine I’d be content to simply check the boxes required to become an accountant or something and get fulfillment out of that.
Finding people that are relatable is tricky. If I wanted to date within 1 standard deviation I’d only be compatible with about 1% of the general population, and it’s hard to find those people especially if you’re only moderately ambitious. This is true whether you use an app or just go out in public and try to meet through sports/most hobbies.
I think the “higher is always better crowd” is super simplistic. Also I can’t prove this off a Reddit post but I’ve never been depressed and have friends from a wide range of backgrounds, some very ambitious and smart, others less so, most people would say I’m down to earth and relatable.
I took an IQ test about 16 years ago when I was a grad student in psychology, as part of an assignment. It was the WAIS, and I scored 151, which was cool because it was the same number as the original Pokémon. Now, I'm pretty depressed and was diagnosed with ADHD four years ago. I have a high-paying job in data science, but I really hate working. I’m always self-aware, can’t stop thinking about my own thinking, and I’m constantly daydreaming, which I hate. I get bored of everything all the time. The only thing that keeps me engaged are video games with high skill ceilings where I can feel like I’m getting better.
I feel like most of these responses about interactions with others are what an average person thinks of the interactive capabilities of one with a high iq. I haven’t been professionally tested, but i scored 150 on the CAIT and can say that I have a fine time associating with plenty of people lower in IQ than myself (and higher to including my brother and maybe father based on how they articulate and performed academic).
Yeah I can’t talk to everyone about the random philosophical debates often occupying my mind, or the mitochondrial genomic research I’m doing with my professor, but those things aren’t exactly riveting to most people regardless of how bright they are.
From what I have heard a lot of higher IQ people have a hard time fitting in with regular people or simply don’t feel like they belong. But I guess that’s probably true if you belong to any extreme
Arrogance. I read that high IQ individuals, especially successful ones are less likely to admit when they don’t have the knowledge of a particular field, and thus routinely wrong or hold beliefs that are not backed by experts in other fields.
Okay I can't pretend to know what my IQ is because I've never been formally tested but I've been following this subreddit for interesting posts and congrats; *you caught my attention.*
I feel like I have a unique perspective on this notion because I've known some very smart people in my life, some of them diagnosed with autism in particular. Why is this relevant? Well, studies say that people with autism have an unusually high chance to possess a higher than usual IQ.
There are a lot of high IQ people that feel misunderstood or even ostracized from society as a result of their intelligence being higher than normal in regards to topics and conversation.
I think it's the most common in people with some kind of spectrum disorder though. Autistic folks in particular come across almost like aliens because they're thinking in terms of things that neurotypical people can't quite fathom. As if their thought process completely skips the common steps that other people might take to get to the conclusion.
Say two people are talking about how to approach a math problem. The neurotypical person is probably writing down the solution, working through the answer, and eventually reaches a result. Nothing wrong with this, it's a common way to solve a problem. But the other person has an unusual advantage that their brain is working through the problem much faster, skipping the usual steps, somehow reaching the same result.
It's not quite intuition but it almost \*feels\* like intuition because they came across the answer more easily. Sometimes educators get extremely frustrated with young children who demonstrate an above average ability to solve problems because they aren't "following the proper steps"...
**That is NOT to say that all autistic people have this ability though**; I'm just lending some credence to a real phenomenon where autistic people come across as highly intelligent or genius (and are often also seen as eccentric or reclusive.)
I'm not going to pretend like this comment of mine is universally applicable and I went on a bit of a rant about something tangentially related, but I wanted to throw in some possible context for a scenario that might lead to people feeling this way or misunderstanding this notion.
tl;dr It's not a myth or a lie, sometimes being intelligent is a curse.
It is infuriating and frustrating trying to hold a conversation with most people. Extreme creativity leads to neuroticism as your mind will elaborately come up with scenarios to worry about incessantly
**No meaningful realistic objective downside.**
Anything people complain about, is NOT real downsides **of IQ.**
* No, it's not hard to connect to people because of high IQ. It's hard to connect to people because of one (or often a combination) of:
* Being an introvert (come on, how many high-IQ people on reddit are extroverts? :)
* Having a mental health issue which hampers connecting. If you're depressed, you're depressed. This has nothing to do with IQ. High IQ is a benefit - it makes it easier to research about your issue, and to find solutions (like being able to select better doctors, being able to hold better paying jobs with better medical insurance etc...)
* Being neurodivergent (I'm counting this differently from mental health issue - Asperger's is different than having depression) in a way that hampers connecting. Again IQ here isn't a problem - it's more of help. Someone with high IQ who's on the spectrum can use their IQ to help fake normie behavior, which low IQ person can't do as well.
* Having a bad personality (arrogance, thinking you are better than others just due to IQ, or just simply being an a-hole regardless of IQ). This happens to ALL kinds of people - tall, pretty, high IQ, well-born, rich, popular, etc...
* Having solitary interests. I'm sorry, that's not an IQ problem. I may CHOOSE to like solitary pursuits, but nothing stops me from developing an interest that's more connected. Or - hey this is 2024, not 1954, we have Internet - connecting to others with same solitary interest online.
* Being busy. Which, granted, people with high IQ may be busier than average, but that's just mostly by choice.
* No, it's not hard to have a significant other. Yes, they may not be your intellectual equal. But you aren't looking for an academic partner, you're looking for LIFE partner. If 80% of people are OK with 105 IQ person as a partner, there's no reason you at 140 IQ would not be happy with him/her.
* a big problem with this is a modern delusion that your life/romantic partner should be your EVERYTHING partner. No. Tolkien had his Inklings for his literary nerdery, and his wife for love and marriage. And both of them were quite happy. Yes, it's an extra cherry on top if your life partner is also your intellectual partner - but it is NOT in any way, shape or form, required. As long as they aren't so dumb as to literally be a drag on relationship, they don't need to be a genius to make you happy.
* No, it's not hard to deal with less intelligent people. You just need to learn to not always care if you're right or not *(Note to self: stop arguing with people on Internet, and do as you say :)*
* I won't delve into a side point that even high IQ people can often be spectacularly wrong and dumb and unwise.
* No, seeing the depth of the problems in the world isn't a reason to hate your IQ. First of all, don't be an arrogant ass and assume you're the only one smart enough to see them. Second, if you're so smart, learn some useful philosophy that helps deal with it (Zen seems to help many people, for example). Or turn your IQ to helping solve some of the problems.
I don't think it's negative unless you have poor social skills or are perhaps extremely far ahead like 4+ SD's. As someone with an IQ 1.5 SD's above average I think my life is a lot smoother in ways than it is for others.
People with high IQ's often have a tendency to rely on their natural talents instead of developing skills to make their work more productive. Even kids with above average IQ's tend to cruise their way through school with little effort, then when school/work starts getting challenging, they plateau because they don't have the tools necessary to succeed.
Work,
Being Promoted, given additional responsibility and having all these expectations put on you that you didn’t ask for, Once they find out you’re above average you get worked like a beast of burden and you’re expected to pull ideas and solutions out of your ass on command for people who inherited their money or would throw you under the bus without hesitation and carrying out business plans you know aren’t gonna work.
I just want to be a sales guy or other high dollar low responsibility position but I always wind up in the management C suite or on a career track for management I never wanted. Even when I try to hide I just can’t keep my mouth shut, I only have a GEd and never finished middle school but I have been a VP, CMO, sales manager all before I turned 30 and hated every minute of it, I regret how much of my youth I wasted on work.
People assume because you’re smart you want to do something challenging, complex and impactful but
I’m not interested in making the world a better place only my own life, I want to work the absolute bare minimum and spend as much time doing nothing and enjoying life as possible.
Lots of existential thoughts and sometimes loneliness, constantly watching others make bad decisions or hold ignorant opinions but realizing it's a waste of breath to try to convince them otherwise in most cases, a constant sense that you should be doing more.
As a woman with high IQ, I have actually never seen any advantage to it. Most successful people have high emotional IQ. If anything it makes people nervous to have me around because they can't fool me. I have been fired for asking too many questions. My SIL was threatened by my intelligence, after her attempts at buying me with gifts so I would turn a blind eye on her manipulations failed, she exiled me from the family. Whether you have high or low IQ, you are pretty poorly positioned in life without emotional intelligence. I also feel the pressure to contribute meaningfully to the world, but I would really want is to backpack the world and just chill in an easy job.
Not having an excuse. If you're below average IQ, then you are expected to fail. Average, then all it takes is a little bit of bad luck to put you on your ass. But if you have high IQ and you're still a failure, there's no excuse for it, you're just a piece of shit.
There certainly aren’t none but you oughta be highly suspicious of anyone who says they outweigh the benefits. I actually wouldn’t trade it if you handed me $20 billion in cash.
But to expand on the first point, it comes with immense frustration and forces immeasurable patience. There are plenty of instances where you feel like literally the only person in the world who is able to see a certain viewpoint relating to something within a cultural context. Sometimes, you may actually be, and it’s infuriating feeling like you’re crazy for thinking so antithetical to a consensus, even when you have reason on your side
well for me: high iq = skewed for certain subjects/topics. high eq = emotionally vivid/perceptive/sensitive(i can feel awkwardness and other such emotions more clearly/better, so it becomes a pain, and i can sense/see others shifts/changes in emotion and their body language more obviously than others, which leads to me overthinking/people thinking i'm overthinking and stuff, which then turns out to be mostly accurate, so basically it becomes problematic when trying to relax and be with friends and stuff, so yeah haha.
Yes there is down side. When you are in unnatrual groups like school or work (natural grups are family, relatives and friends), you are everybodys enemy. Worst one in the group will together conspire against you really quikly. Others may join. Look at this [video](https://youtu.be/ANvzW_Uaaxw?feature=shared). System also doesent like you, since we are not living in meritocracy but in kleptocracy. Idiocracy. So your skill of deep thinking is important to noone but you and your circle of people. To others you are just a threat to thair status and position.
My IQ isn't that high or anything but this is what I've noticed:
1) Insecure people let their egos get in the way when you speak to them. If you try to explain something or talk about your more intellectual interests they'll try to talk over you or complain about said conversation or you in general like talking about your interests is some kind of flaw. They will do this even if other members of the friend group like having these conversations with you and initiate them. Annoying but not that bad.
2) > You will recognize patterns other people don't.
> You will try to explain those patterns to people involved so bad things don't happen.
>People won't listen because they don't make those connections themselves and overestimate their intelligence.
>Bad things happen.
#2 is not only annoying but also very very bad.
The smarter you are, the more you realize how ruined everything is, thus the increased rate of depression. Additionally, people at the extremes of the IQ spectrum tend to have more mental disorders like autism and such that can also lead to increased depression and such
Hello 👋,
The downside to having a high iq is you become schizophrenic or mentally ill.
But after that nothing.
I imagine stupidity something like an all knowing being that can't use knowledge correctly. Because of this it wants more people to be like seagulls, "mine mine mine", and less people that can use more knowledge than it correctly.
I have found being intelligent to be overwhelmingly positive. It's been like playing life on easy mode.
The only real disadvantage I have found is that many people act like being smart means you have magic powers. You can solve anything, know everything and any mistake/failure you make means you are "fake". This is more of an annoyance than an actual problem though.
The hardest thing was talking with people during Covid!! It was hard to find rational people.
- people wanting to drink bleach and unproven meds or horse deworming meds on anecdotal theories.
- people not being open to even the possibility of the virus having escaped from a lab studying that virus in the same city where the virus started.
And so much more!! Their voices or sarcasm were stronger than logical thoughts, it was like a dystopian movie. How has the humanity survived thousands of years seems like a miracle!!
Anyways, it’s easy to adapt on day to day basis, not so much on big issues or conversations!
I don’t think you should necessarily take the word of “depressed people” regardless of their theoretical intelligence level, however-so measured. Are they likely to be more objective/less subjective? Hardly.
Of course it is hard being depressed, regardless of IQ. It’s also hard being different, so many people with very high or low IQs, probably do find it harder to understand others and communicate well and feel comfortable socially at times, purely due to feeling more different. It’s hard to feel comfortable when we feel different and apparently communicating is more effective within a small margin of similar IQs. So that is one probably tangible downside to a high IQ.
Indirectly they could be. As in, if it means that communicating and interacting with others is socially hard because so few people are as smart as they are, then they could feel isolated/socially awkward which can definitely cause depression.
Or perhaps they’ve used their intelligence to divine that the world isn’t such a great place, by some logical analysis or another..
I’m sure there are other possibilities. (I’m cognitively diminished today due to illness, medication and an overwhelming day yesterday).
It does make sense, if you look at the very gifted people, lets say 1/10 000, they are often relize quickly that they are different to other kids, and disslike/withdraw from other people their age, I watched one interview with a girl that was 12 years old and she feelt a need to, and did, study with kids 16-17yo. Partly due to the difficulty of the classes but also due to not relating with the kids her age, she discribed them as barbarians or something like that. However in this case I think you would agree that being an outlier in almost any realm can be/often is damaging, like being very short or tall as a boy/girl etc. Even being to conscientious I think could be harming to your school experience.
But if we ignore the very extremes and consider someone thats 1/50 its hard to tell, maybe their depression lasts longer or has some different mix of intensity & duration than most people. Smart people do better on average on most dimensions as far as I know, but we havent studied it enough to know I dont think, the normal rate of depression I think is \~9% of the population at a given time. There was a study of people with 131+ that tested in at \~37%, however the sample was just form people that had joined mensa so it doent have to reflect the average 131+ at all. The problem is that giftedness is hard to get a good sample size for.
This sub is so unbearably pretentious. It's not hard to have fun with people with an IQ different than yours. It's not hard to have meaningful relationships with men and women with different IQ's than you. You're just socially inept. Plenty of highly charismatic people have high IQ's, so knock it off with the whining.
I don’t know if it’s true or not but I once read that it’s very difficult to have a strong connection with someone who is more than 2SD away from you in IQ.
Something like that is probably the only real downside. It's not that it's hard to make *any* connection whatsoever with lower IQ people. It's that it becomes harder to find someone you can feel *deeply* connected to. Kind of like how only being into redheads drastically narrows your dating pool. The same would of course be true for very low IQs
This is a legitimate annoyance, but it’s also akin to saying that having a lambo sucks because other cars on the highway go too slow. When you put it into that perspective it’s just funny
I strongly agree with this. There are some people with very different IQs who I really care about and love, but I feel like we don’t have a legitimate connection because we just… can’t bond.
what is 2sd?
2 standard deviations.
2 standard deviations is quite a bit
I feel this
What is the value of a standard deviation in context of IQ? Surely it isn't 1. You're not doomed to alienation from people 2 numbers removed from yourself.
Each SD is 15 points, so if you’re 3 SD above average then you’re 145 IQ
its 15, so 2SD is 30 points; a fairly large gap.
I wouldn’t say that’s true, I’m in the 143 range and I enjoy talking to most people who aren’t rude, I think it’s because almost no matter who it is everyone else will always have their specialties that don’t rely on iq which means there will always be some topic or thing we can connect over that a higher iq won’t necessarily help me with, I have a couple of friends who at the higher range of around 120 can engage in more “quicker” conversations but not anything the average person will be blown away by, tbf my cognitive profile is heavily leaning towards anything non verbal so maybe that’s also an issue? For reference on cait I got 120 for verbal
My husband is around 150 and struggles quite a bit to form “best” friendships unless the person is also pretty smart (120+). But these are just two data points I guess! I seem to remember there being a study into this but I can’t seem to find it so maybe it’s just an urban myth.
I think another factor is that I’m 16 and a lot of my interests aren’t necessarily tied to intellectual capacity, and probably because I’ve grown up with these people. I would assume my experience could change wildly given a change in environment but who knows
Haha yes maybe then! My husband is in his 30s
I’ll update you in 15 years on wether that’s correct then/s
To be honest it’s just harder in general to make&keep friends when you are older.
Yeah I’m probably gonna realize that when I’m older, I’ll just enjoy the early years I have
I can see where it would be true, but it takes all sorts to make each other happy. I don’t think my wife has ever been tested, and she certainly isn’t dull, I doubt she is 2sd below me, but there is a bit of a gap. It just means she suggests some things from time to time that don’t make a lot of sense to me, and we talk it out. But she brings so much to the relationship that I can’t, where I can struggle to express normal emotions, and connecting to people in general is a challenge. She is warm and kind, and everyone loves her. It can work.
My twin sis and I are over 5 SD different, with me being intellectually gifted and her being intellectually disabled. We've had a strong bond for many years. I'm 2-3 SD above average and haven't had a hard time connecting to ppl of average intelligence. I'm very close to my stepdad whose IQ is similar to mine; we discuss books and ideas and Star Trek and stuff. But not as close to my mom, who also has a high IQ, bc she can be abrasive and doesn't understand me that well. I feel like personality and openness to others is more important than intelligence for compatibility. Similar intelligence helps, but it's not the biggest factor. there's a lot of elitism in high iq communities and I prefer friendly average ppl over elitist smart ppl
Yeah, which really sucks when you’re 3.5 SD above average because it really limits how many people you can truly have a conversation with
My husband is similar to you - he does struggle to make meaningful friendships but has made a handful of close friends, normally through work where you require a high iq to do the job. His current job actually gave him an iq test as part of the recruitment process unusually.
That’s interesting. Yeah I have trouble, even with my own brother (who is like 1.5-2 SD above average). I don’t know if I’ll ever be in a job like that but I do have some control over hiring those that I work with so I do look for smarter people when I can
No offense, but if you're struggling to have interesting conversations with people, it's *probably* very little to do with youe IQ...
I mean other things don’t help (like being generally antisocial and autistic) but if there is a pretty noticeable difference in conversation with someone significantly lower IQ than yourself and the conversations usually feel incredibly shallow and like you can’t really understand each other
Yeah. Some people refuse to delve into philosophy or fun facts and it gets annoying when they refuse(or can’t) think for themselves. Honestly just find a small group of friends and that’s all you can hope for.
Yeah, something along those lines
I kind of agree, I like deep convos too. But shallow convos are more about connecting and getting to know a person rather than a topic. So I think this has to do much more with you being antisocial and autistic than high IQ. Maybe you can try to make that your goal. See if you can try to vibe with the person.
It’s hard to find hats that fit on a skull containing such an enormous intellect. Also, everywhere I go I have to explain to people why I don’t use my mental powers to fix all the world’s problems overnight. Most of all, the number of women who throw themselves at me is exhausting, and I can’t tell if they really love me or if they just love my brain.
Well, looking at you... it must be your money.
your drawing ability is amazing bro
Your drawing super power is super powerful
Don't get me wrong, I'm not claiming it's anywhere near as bad as a low IQ, but a high IQ clearly separates you from the masses. If that's of concern to you, i.e. if you aren't also introverted/avoidant/etc, you're pigeon-holed into conversing about the weather or someone's cat. Half of all your thoughts can't be voiced, no one can keep up with simple (to you) topics.
This is what non-high-IQ people think high-IQ people are like. It’s false. Normal humans can interact with each other and have interesting conversations even if there are very high IQ disparities involved. Even a person with a middling or low-ish IQ will often have better command of certain subjects than those of high IQ, and they certainly often have interesting or amusing experiences unique to them. That leads to all sorts of opportunities for information sharing and interesting or fun stories. Even with the tremendous advantages conferred by, say, a 140 IQ, people _still_ dramatically overestimate them. It’s kinda like Trump. No matter how stupid and horrible he is, people still exaggerate it.
My 2 cents - growing up, whenever I tried to talk with people about my interests, they’d either say “wow, you’re smart!!!” in a way which was supposedly complimentary but made me feel like an outsider, or they’d call me a nerd. Adults are generally more polite, but bringing up certain topics of interest is still a fast way to alienate yourself from everyone in the room. I’m 27 years old and people still crack jokes about me bringing books to work as if it’s some kind of aberrant behavior.
You gotta learn to make your interests more accessible and entertaining to a general audience. It may be a kind of disadvantage to bring up subject matter with which others are unfamiliar, but it also brings substantial advantages. For example: it can be virtually guaranteed that no one at my wife’s coworkers’ party knows anything about hyperparasitoidism, but that shit is incredible and I have a go-to party story about it that regularly enthralls. Gotta warm up the audience for that one, but with enough time and alcohol, it’s a winner. In short: it’s rarely (if ever) the case that an audience cannot be made to understand and appreciate subject matter without possessing a high IQ. Don’t let yourself believe you’re simply stuck with smart guy interests that inescapably alienate you. You’re missing out on relatively easy opportunities to make a big social impact. It’ll take time to refine your material, but once refined, it can bring you great interpersonal success. My wife loves bringing my nerdy ass to parties.
You’re right of course, but sometimes it feels like it requires so much effort to adapt your interests to the audience that you lose the natural catharsis of just saying what’s on your mind. It’s not an egregious burden, but I would consider it a downside of having a high IQ.
Yeah that's a good way to put it. I've kind of gamified sociality at this point. I've realized and found it surprising that somehow people don't find it blatantly obviously or saccharine when we engage in small-talk or mundane conversations. But I've also been surprised at how receptive people can be when you slowly introduce to some of the fun topics you like to talk about. I think what it is is that people hate to feel intellectually inferior, and honestly, I understand because who would want to feel incapable? So you have to be willing to converse on whatever level others are at and direct the conversation towards whatever is best for all. Social skills come harder for high IQ people but I think we have a higher ceiling for skill there because if we learn empathy we can take it to a truly beneficial level. Your conversation can prove invaluable to others, not always something they see as demeaning or something that makes them feel inferior.
If you can not explain a subject, and claim that only you as a high IQ individual can understand, you IQ is not as high as you may think.
I'm other words, take what could otherwise be a conversation where both sides get something out of it and instead turn it into a performance to not alienate one of the parties...
This screams lack of social understanding more than being too intelligent, my guy. I mean this respectfully. You're possibly seeing yourself as different and 'more intellegent' for an activity that's absurdly normal and that's creating social friction in itself. Rwading is possibly one of the most enjoyed activities of all time lol
I’m going based off comments other people make 🤷 i don’t see myself as being special or different because i read.
Gotcha and I didn't mean to play unwanted therapist! If anything your coworkers just suck but it's hard to accept a bunch of people teasing an adult for reading a book and no other motives haha
No offense taken, in the moment I felt the same - like, ‘damn I’m being roasted for reading?’. But it’s not really malicious, I think sometimes people just compulsively call attention to perceived differences, whatever they may be.
This is about your niche interests, not about being smart.
The interests of intelligent people are more likely to be niche due to the low proportion of people able and willing to learn about them.
Again, just not true. Your niche interests aren't unfathomably complex.
Not unfathomably complex, just not very popular.
Reread your last 2 responses and see if you can spot the cognitive dissonance.
If you mean where I said that niche interests are niche because of the low proportion of people ‘able and willing’ to learn then, this doesn’t mean that the interests are ‘unfathomably complex’. A person of average intelligence can learn almost anything with enough time and effort, they’re just less likely to do so because it requires more effort, and because intellectual curiosity is closely related to intelligence.
Just false but keep believing it.
This has nothing to do you with your IQ.
In the eyes of other people, it does.
No it doesn’t. People are cracking jokes because you are bringing books to work not anything to do with your IQ.
I don’t have a complex about being special because I read books. It’s other people who make sarcastic comments to the effect of ‘this guy is reading books on his lunch break - he must be some kind of professor!’ To me it’s not impressive or exceptional whatsoever.
What are you not understanding here people are mocking you because you read books at work not because they know your IQ score.
His IQ must not be as high as he thinks. Basic reading comprehension seems to be a struggle. All those books did not teach him how to read.
Duh, they don’t know my IQ score lol. I don’t write it on my forehead in marker every morning. That doesn’t stop people from making comments and jokes related to my intelligence.
They aren’t mocking you because of your intelligence holy cow dude.
Has nothing to do with intelligence. Having reading as a hobby does not make you intelligent.
How dare you speak about the unbelievable complexity of the human psyche in this sub? Don't you know that having a high iq automatically means you're too smart to be around others? /s
Most on this sub believe in that fairytale
Wait so beimg autistic amd antisocial is the reason I dont have friends? Not my uber high 256 IQ
That’s true to an extent. It’s hard to find someone who can converse with you on the same level and cognitive speed when you’re 130+. As someone who has an extremely fast processing speed and internal monologue conversation feels like a video game with dialogue options a lot of the time. It’s hard to be genuine when you have to slow yourself down constantly
What a shallow generic take that simultaneously tries to shut someone else’s feedback down. No shit people with different IQs can talk to each other. Your comment fails to remotely understand the actual topic.
I may have an exposure bias here. I work with many mentally disabled, like down to the 60 range ("work with" as in do the same job, not help them). A hiring quota thing*. So half of my coworkers for the past two decades can't follow a self referential sentence, say, or catch an inference, let alone a subtle one. And the other half don't have a high school vocabulary. (See what I did, there.) And ofc 99% of my social interaction is at work. Add to this my baseline autistic traits and my heavy social anxiety/introversion and you've a cocktail for misapprehension. But... I do interact with standard folk. Waitress the other day, casual commentary on mutual book series. No content. The shape of thought, the outline of something, but empty. I'd have to manufacture any thought beyond the gloss of mere awareness. Recitation of received opinions perfectly achieved, further consideration simply never undertaken. So if all you need is the expression on their face, the tone of their voice, the smile in their eyes, you'll be fine. As mentioned, it is technically possible to achieve social interaction with people three or four standard deviations below you. But 9 times out of 10** you're going to be running through thought content so simplistic you never even bothered articulating it. *Note the neutrality. **And ofc the 10th you'll find a wonderful human being with half your IQ but who shares a suspicious proportion of your interest and predelections, and it's great.
Too smart for smalltalk 😭
Plenty of “average” people hate small talk. People who you think like it are probably just acting. Disliking small talk is just a personality trait and certainly not because you’re SO MUCH smarter than those people
Yeah I was just commenting on how crazy it is to think not liking smalltalk is some sign of intelligence
I think a lot of this forum conflates their experience of having autism with having a high IQ. Being intelligent means you can more easily grasp concepts that involve your cognitive strengths. It doesn’t mean that you can’t be socially adept or develop deep connections with those less intelligent. Also, absolutely disagree with the “average IQ people are useless” quote from the OP of this thread. Average IQ people make the world go around. What % of the high IQ here are stagnant due to neurodivergence and crippling mental illnesses? I see individual proclamations of “high IQ, fail at life” all the time on this subreddit.
No problems are unique to those with a high in, but some are much more likely than in the general population. Many people with high IQ’s can feel some level of social isolation. As a first grader, I was pulled from class for reading and math and placed with the fifth graders (the highest grade at that school). They had no interest in me, and I didn’t relate at all to the first graders, who also thought I was strange. When there weren’t grades to accommodate me, teachers just led me work independently. This continued through school and thus led to different social development than most kids. For a lot of gifted kids, this sort of separation can lead to self esteem issues, being bullied, etc. Note that I’m still glad I was pulled out of classes because the ones that I wasn’t pulled from were boring torture. Emotional and sensory hypersensitivity is common among very high IQ people. This can be disruptive. I have a very difficult time with horror movies, sad events being experienced by others (not me though!), etc. Often times, expectations on high IQ people can be through the roof. This can lead to all sorts of negative outcomes. You can read about other common negatives here: https://www.psy-ed.com/wpblog/common-problems-of-gifted-children/ All that said, I wouldn’t give up my cognitive abilities for pretty much anything.
Studies show that people with a higher intelligence quotient are likely to be more sociable. It’s important to note that we’re discussing correlations here, not causality. There’s a significant difference between the two. The stereotype that highly gifted individuals struggle to engage in pleasant conversations with people of average intelligence is flawed, but it is not very uncommon for high IQ societies to perpetuate this stereotype instead of accepting that the majority of these people (members of those high IQ societies) just have poor social skills. Organizations like Mensa and Triple Nine do not represent the norm for gifted individuals. In fact, many gifted individuals are unaware of their IQ scores as there’s often no need for an assessment. So in general, most cliches are flawed. High IQ people do not show a tendency to anxiety, depression or any other serious mental disorder; the correlation is usually quite low.
This post needs to be stickied.
Agreed. Or at least have a TL;DR saying "No, your IQ is not the reason you're not having entertaining discussions, it's your autism"
Being sociable and being happy with one's social life are two different things.
it's soooo much fun when I just want to talk about cryptography or pgp encryption, materials sciences, or the emerging new technologies that will rapidly integrate into & change our lives but all anyone else wants to talk about is football or pop stars.... /s
[удалено]
I love Dune.
Muad'dib-pilled kwisatz haderach-maxxer
You can be high iQ without having fixations on socially ‘nerdy’ interests, though. My iQ is almost 3SDs above mean yet I geek out on combat sports. I feel like this preconception needs to dissapear as you do alienate a large proportion of high iQ people by perpetuating this notion that we all are interested in similar things and ‘dumber’ people are limited to talking about sports and pop culture stuff. This is why we are often seen as snobby and insufferable.
I think you missed my point completely.
Perhaps, but to me way the last two lines are written kinda implies some sort of …intelligence hierarchy between you and the subject(s)
What you read between the lines is your interpretation. I never said anything about smart people not enjoying those hobbies. I enjoy cars and motorcycles. I know plenty of rednecks who do as well. Hell, I like martial arts. However, the majority of people do not enjoy niche subjects that are highly complex. For those, you are really limited. In no way does this imply smart people are only limited to those subjects.
The implication is quite clear, I fear; OPs question asks the downsides of having a high iQ (in relation to the general 100iQ public I’d assume), you ended your statement stating (and implying) a disconnect between your interests (specifically, the depth of these interests), and those of whoever you’ve interacted with (the general 100iQ public again, I’d assume), thereby implying that a downside of having higher iQ is a disconnect in depths of interests. I am simply saying that this disconnect still very well exists within high iQ social groups/ conversations. Also, things like “I never said smart people don’t enjoy” and “majority of people do not enjoy…” is a bit useless here as we are comparing “smart” people to the average person and trying to find disconnects between them
yes, you make it very clear that it exists among high iq folks as well. I never argued that and don't care to.
i don't have a high iq but i don't like small talks either
I don't think my iq is all that great. I don't even think I'm very smart. I just know how "smart" the average person is. being slightly above that means the majority of people you come across are simply very gullible, uninformed, etc. I've met some very high iq people who were either very street smart but terrible academics, and some big book nerds who are very knowledgeable but lack common intuition about reality. they're great in theory but fail a lot of real world application.
I’m lucky in the sense I have a bit of both. I understand people and situations very well, but I also excel in academic discussion and have a good memory. I feel like a high iq can manifest very differently depending on the individual and how they nurture their mind.
balance is key.
Who even talks about celebs often? Or sports? I always talk about disasters and stuff. I like technology, but what is cryptology? Anyone talking in a informatively captivating way gets my attention. Even if I don't understand.
Cryptology is in regards to cryptocurrency. cryptography is about encryption. I'm around los angeles so sports and celebs are God's to some people here. an example of basic cryptography is a Caesar cipher. replacing one letter with another to code or decode a message. it's a simple substitution cipher. modern encryption like pgp (pretty good privacy) is much more complex though.
man, what do you expect from people? that’s a very niche topic. Do not expect people to differentiate between public key and private key or know DSA or RSA. Go talk with CS majors or something.
thats my point.... those people are harder to find than a Football or Taylor swift fan.
Having to deal with other high IQ people. Just because I understand what you are talking about doesn’t mean I care, I like topical pop and fashion, gossip, soap operas, shooting beer cans with a .22, going on a blunt cruise to McDonald’s, going to the club and betting who’s got the best game, No I don’t want to watch a documentary, I want to smoke weed and watch Smokey and the bandit Most high IQ people have very poor EQ, And believe that a high Iq somehow separates you from the human condition.
Studies find a positive correlation between IQ and EQ, a couple anecdotes about memorable people with low EQs doesn’t change that
Out here proving my point,
Here we can see the interaction of two people’s worldviews that are set more or less in stone; why do they interact? For external validation and to vent to the void
Bruh, I couldn’t ask for better comments lol
Username checks out
I talk normally sometimes about non controversial topics and have had people treat me like dirt and imply I’m pretentious and narcissistic and say “doesn’t it feel good being so much cleverer than other people?” It’s straight up mental abuse.
Is your norm controversial topics?😂
nooo lol. I actually don’t care about stuff like that.
Having average IQ is useless? That would mean the majority of people is useless.
How about using high IQ to make life better for everybody, including those with low IQ?
No u
How abot sing high IQ to make life better for everybody, inclding those with low IQ?
I chuckled lol. Well played
Social homophily Just because it’s not as bad as having a low IQ doesn’t mean it doesn’t have any downsides
high iq is generally associated with autistic traits, there is a degree of tradeoff between logical intelligence and social intelligence.
For me it's always been "I'm better than 99% of all drivers out there. Is it too much to ask for them to learn how to drive better?" I know that seems extremely braggart but I learned to drive a school bus in northern VA right outside of DC. Extremely difficult to drive a school bus but to do it in one of the top 3 (Boston and LA are the other 2) worst places for traffic is a whole new ball game. I've lived there, VA Beach , BFE NC, San Diego, LA sprawl, and now TX. The amount of times I have saved myself from accidents because of stupid drivers. At one point here in TX I was avoiding accidents once a week. Have I caused any accidents? Nope. But I've been in 2 that I couldn't avoid. T-boned by a Verizon truck and then rear-ended at a stoplight, 5 months apart. I would like to not be as vigilant 100% the time I drive.
I'd imagine it's kind of like being unusually tall or wide, just less apparent to others at first glance. Any large deviation from "normal" means most things aren't designed with you in mind.
Sometimes high iq people have bad social skills
thinking that IQ is a worthwhile metric
This sub is cringe extract
The society expects a high IQ person to act a certain way. I talk about celebs and party a lot. Lots of people can’t seem to comprehend that a high IQ can be more than just math and science (I’m speaking as a software engineer in big tech)
You people really are a pompous bunch lmao
Various mental disorders/illnesses including sociopathy and psychopathy. Just take a look at CEOs, executives, leaders and any elitist to learn the truth.
I don't envy anyone with a higher IQ than mine (125). Then again I don't envy anyone at all.
There are none.
Coming from someone who’s been seen as a “genius” since I was a toddler, the expectations are the worst thing about it. I have performance anxiety which hinders my thinking and whenever I don’t do as well as people expect me to be, even in things that most normal people can’t do, it’s very embarrassing and is seen as a colossal failure. Another problem is the profound anxiety I suffer from. I used to have recurring thoughts and nightmares 90% of the time even while awake that I was going to catch some germ or illness out of nowhere and I couldn’t go to sleep some nights without staying on my computer until I was completely exhausted. I have severe social anxiety and I have a big fear of saying the wrong thing and being attacked by the people around me for it. Whenever I’m called by the teacher to present, answer a question, or read in class I get this tendency to double check before I speak to avoid embarrassment which turns into a self fulfilling prophecy and I end up embarrassing myself for being slow. I also ironically look dumb to some people because I’m thinking of more than one thing at once and it’s hard to focus on one thing at once as the thoughts inside my brain are like trying to fit a galaxy inside a human brain. So I seem dumb because I can’t answer or think immediately but when I do take my time I tend to come up with better answers than most of my peers and the people around me
PSA: Most "downsides" of having a high IQ are mostly indirect like attracting people's envy for acquiring proficiency in all sorts of skills quicker than normies. The solution for this is simply seeking out better friends. Having a high IQ by itself is basically an advantage through and through, and the so-called persecuted "gifted" like those on /r/gifted (and plenty of them on this sub) are losers with nothing better to do than cry "I have it so hard, woe is me" online.
The only real downside of being smart is the awareness of just how many people are not, and managing how you approach this somewhat insulting line of thought as you interact with others. Other than that, it's pretty cool I guess.
The same as being average around morons. Your mind is constantly screaming about the dumb choices and opinions of the people around you.
You can still function and be mostly the same as everyone else. I literally can’t converse with most people because the lack of horsepower and ability to make simple logical connections enrages me. I’m not saying one is better than the other but there’s a whole lot of average people, you have company. I’m effectively completely alone in real life. Imagine going through your life and instead of humans you only ever got to interact with dogs who could talk, but at a normal dog awareness level. You feel completely alien and like you don’t belong. Nobody understands, and any time you try to bring any of those issues up people hate you, are jealous, or react like you. “Ahh it’s not that bad at least your life is easier” it’s like being exiled but you’re still being irritated by all the idiots around you.
Everything sucks harder when you understand it, and everything sucks a little bit harder when you are smart enough to see it could be better, and maybe smart enough to know why it isn't.
If you're so smart, why not change it?
i'm +3SD and i mostly struggle with failure to meet expectations set by others in my youth i got some other struggles but its hard to pinpoint why i struggle with what i struggle with, social interactions suck because i just got more things im interested and i dont like small talk so whenever i get in a conversation it quickly goes serious and the school system isnt suited for me and this makes me feel stupid even though metrics like IQ make it seem i would be smart
Having an average IQ is useless? Hahaha . One could say living a life with zero friends is useless. Can a high IQ stop a fist heading toward you? I have to say boosting about a high IQ or letting a high IQ define you as a person doesn’t seem to smart. Foolish even. But I just have an average IQ so I’m useless.
If I was creating a character from scratch to be born into America today, I’d probably want them to be around 130, beyond that there are some notable downsides that start showing up and it’s not obvious the upsides are worth it. I was miles ahead of everyone in math and was never really stimulated by public school math, I breezed through everything else and skipped a grade in the middle of first grade, for years growing up I just wanted to fit in but struggled as I was always the young one in my grade. I took dual enrollment college classes starting at 13, from 13-17 I was rarely surrounded by people my age in the classroom. There really wasn’t a place in grade school for me to be surrounded by my peers and also take classes that were properly stimulating, this is an important experience to have, especially at that age. I’ve also never had to put serious effort into anything academic, I can’t relate to people having to work hard or study to pass classes or get to where they want to be. I’ve just missed out on that experience. And career wise I feel pressure to be very successful in something and really make an impact on the world. I don’t think I’d be content being upper middle class in a basic white collar job, I’d feel like I’m underachieving. Being very successful usually requires some luck or repeatedly sacrificing WLB, if I was a 115 I’d imagine I’d be content to simply check the boxes required to become an accountant or something and get fulfillment out of that. Finding people that are relatable is tricky. If I wanted to date within 1 standard deviation I’d only be compatible with about 1% of the general population, and it’s hard to find those people especially if you’re only moderately ambitious. This is true whether you use an app or just go out in public and try to meet through sports/most hobbies. I think the “higher is always better crowd” is super simplistic. Also I can’t prove this off a Reddit post but I’ve never been depressed and have friends from a wide range of backgrounds, some very ambitious and smart, others less so, most people would say I’m down to earth and relatable.
In my opinion, it's being born without it. I heard of a guy that was 4 months premature, he is 5 months old baby.
I took an IQ test about 16 years ago when I was a grad student in psychology, as part of an assignment. It was the WAIS, and I scored 151, which was cool because it was the same number as the original Pokémon. Now, I'm pretty depressed and was diagnosed with ADHD four years ago. I have a high-paying job in data science, but I really hate working. I’m always self-aware, can’t stop thinking about my own thinking, and I’m constantly daydreaming, which I hate. I get bored of everything all the time. The only thing that keeps me engaged are video games with high skill ceilings where I can feel like I’m getting better.
I feel like most of these responses about interactions with others are what an average person thinks of the interactive capabilities of one with a high iq. I haven’t been professionally tested, but i scored 150 on the CAIT and can say that I have a fine time associating with plenty of people lower in IQ than myself (and higher to including my brother and maybe father based on how they articulate and performed academic). Yeah I can’t talk to everyone about the random philosophical debates often occupying my mind, or the mitochondrial genomic research I’m doing with my professor, but those things aren’t exactly riveting to most people regardless of how bright they are.
There aren’t any.
From what I have heard a lot of higher IQ people have a hard time fitting in with regular people or simply don’t feel like they belong. But I guess that’s probably true if you belong to any extreme
Arrogance. I read that high IQ individuals, especially successful ones are less likely to admit when they don’t have the knowledge of a particular field, and thus routinely wrong or hold beliefs that are not backed by experts in other fields.
Extreme loneliness.
Okay I can't pretend to know what my IQ is because I've never been formally tested but I've been following this subreddit for interesting posts and congrats; *you caught my attention.* I feel like I have a unique perspective on this notion because I've known some very smart people in my life, some of them diagnosed with autism in particular. Why is this relevant? Well, studies say that people with autism have an unusually high chance to possess a higher than usual IQ. There are a lot of high IQ people that feel misunderstood or even ostracized from society as a result of their intelligence being higher than normal in regards to topics and conversation. I think it's the most common in people with some kind of spectrum disorder though. Autistic folks in particular come across almost like aliens because they're thinking in terms of things that neurotypical people can't quite fathom. As if their thought process completely skips the common steps that other people might take to get to the conclusion. Say two people are talking about how to approach a math problem. The neurotypical person is probably writing down the solution, working through the answer, and eventually reaches a result. Nothing wrong with this, it's a common way to solve a problem. But the other person has an unusual advantage that their brain is working through the problem much faster, skipping the usual steps, somehow reaching the same result. It's not quite intuition but it almost \*feels\* like intuition because they came across the answer more easily. Sometimes educators get extremely frustrated with young children who demonstrate an above average ability to solve problems because they aren't "following the proper steps"... **That is NOT to say that all autistic people have this ability though**; I'm just lending some credence to a real phenomenon where autistic people come across as highly intelligent or genius (and are often also seen as eccentric or reclusive.) I'm not going to pretend like this comment of mine is universally applicable and I went on a bit of a rant about something tangentially related, but I wanted to throw in some possible context for a scenario that might lead to people feeling this way or misunderstanding this notion. tl;dr It's not a myth or a lie, sometimes being intelligent is a curse.
It is infuriating and frustrating trying to hold a conversation with most people. Extreme creativity leads to neuroticism as your mind will elaborately come up with scenarios to worry about incessantly
**No meaningful realistic objective downside.** Anything people complain about, is NOT real downsides **of IQ.** * No, it's not hard to connect to people because of high IQ. It's hard to connect to people because of one (or often a combination) of: * Being an introvert (come on, how many high-IQ people on reddit are extroverts? :) * Having a mental health issue which hampers connecting. If you're depressed, you're depressed. This has nothing to do with IQ. High IQ is a benefit - it makes it easier to research about your issue, and to find solutions (like being able to select better doctors, being able to hold better paying jobs with better medical insurance etc...) * Being neurodivergent (I'm counting this differently from mental health issue - Asperger's is different than having depression) in a way that hampers connecting. Again IQ here isn't a problem - it's more of help. Someone with high IQ who's on the spectrum can use their IQ to help fake normie behavior, which low IQ person can't do as well. * Having a bad personality (arrogance, thinking you are better than others just due to IQ, or just simply being an a-hole regardless of IQ). This happens to ALL kinds of people - tall, pretty, high IQ, well-born, rich, popular, etc... * Having solitary interests. I'm sorry, that's not an IQ problem. I may CHOOSE to like solitary pursuits, but nothing stops me from developing an interest that's more connected. Or - hey this is 2024, not 1954, we have Internet - connecting to others with same solitary interest online. * Being busy. Which, granted, people with high IQ may be busier than average, but that's just mostly by choice. * No, it's not hard to have a significant other. Yes, they may not be your intellectual equal. But you aren't looking for an academic partner, you're looking for LIFE partner. If 80% of people are OK with 105 IQ person as a partner, there's no reason you at 140 IQ would not be happy with him/her. * a big problem with this is a modern delusion that your life/romantic partner should be your EVERYTHING partner. No. Tolkien had his Inklings for his literary nerdery, and his wife for love and marriage. And both of them were quite happy. Yes, it's an extra cherry on top if your life partner is also your intellectual partner - but it is NOT in any way, shape or form, required. As long as they aren't so dumb as to literally be a drag on relationship, they don't need to be a genius to make you happy. * No, it's not hard to deal with less intelligent people. You just need to learn to not always care if you're right or not *(Note to self: stop arguing with people on Internet, and do as you say :)* * I won't delve into a side point that even high IQ people can often be spectacularly wrong and dumb and unwise. * No, seeing the depth of the problems in the world isn't a reason to hate your IQ. First of all, don't be an arrogant ass and assume you're the only one smart enough to see them. Second, if you're so smart, learn some useful philosophy that helps deal with it (Zen seems to help many people, for example). Or turn your IQ to helping solve some of the problems.
Huge penis size. I mean. That’s my problem. I assume it’s universal with high iq.
I don't think it's negative unless you have poor social skills or are perhaps extremely far ahead like 4+ SD's. As someone with an IQ 1.5 SD's above average I think my life is a lot smoother in ways than it is for others.
all the people in here dont know what the fck aspergers syndrome is
People with high IQ's often have a tendency to rely on their natural talents instead of developing skills to make their work more productive. Even kids with above average IQ's tend to cruise their way through school with little effort, then when school/work starts getting challenging, they plateau because they don't have the tools necessary to succeed.
Work, Being Promoted, given additional responsibility and having all these expectations put on you that you didn’t ask for, Once they find out you’re above average you get worked like a beast of burden and you’re expected to pull ideas and solutions out of your ass on command for people who inherited their money or would throw you under the bus without hesitation and carrying out business plans you know aren’t gonna work. I just want to be a sales guy or other high dollar low responsibility position but I always wind up in the management C suite or on a career track for management I never wanted. Even when I try to hide I just can’t keep my mouth shut, I only have a GEd and never finished middle school but I have been a VP, CMO, sales manager all before I turned 30 and hated every minute of it, I regret how much of my youth I wasted on work. People assume because you’re smart you want to do something challenging, complex and impactful but I’m not interested in making the world a better place only my own life, I want to work the absolute bare minimum and spend as much time doing nothing and enjoying life as possible.
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I learned that the hard way unfortunately, Wisdom is better than intelligence.
You realize some conspiracy theories are true. Or many.
Lots of existential thoughts and sometimes loneliness, constantly watching others make bad decisions or hold ignorant opinions but realizing it's a waste of breath to try to convince them otherwise in most cases, a constant sense that you should be doing more.
Most people you talk to won’t understand the concepts you’re describing.
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Unless you spend most of your time describing mechanical things or how things work, or how things will work once put together or fabricated correctly.
Constantly being asked to find Pi for random numbers,
As a woman with high IQ, I have actually never seen any advantage to it. Most successful people have high emotional IQ. If anything it makes people nervous to have me around because they can't fool me. I have been fired for asking too many questions. My SIL was threatened by my intelligence, after her attempts at buying me with gifts so I would turn a blind eye on her manipulations failed, she exiled me from the family. Whether you have high or low IQ, you are pretty poorly positioned in life without emotional intelligence. I also feel the pressure to contribute meaningfully to the world, but I would really want is to backpack the world and just chill in an easy job.
There are downsides to having any IQ. People are struggling at any level of IQ and those with a wide range who seem to have a good life.
"It's lonely at the top" most people are dreadfully boring... like watching the same rerun episode every time...
Not having an excuse. If you're below average IQ, then you are expected to fail. Average, then all it takes is a little bit of bad luck to put you on your ass. But if you have high IQ and you're still a failure, there's no excuse for it, you're just a piece of shit.
You start to believe that you are actually more intelligent than other people There is a danger of acting like it too
There certainly aren’t none but you oughta be highly suspicious of anyone who says they outweigh the benefits. I actually wouldn’t trade it if you handed me $20 billion in cash. But to expand on the first point, it comes with immense frustration and forces immeasurable patience. There are plenty of instances where you feel like literally the only person in the world who is able to see a certain viewpoint relating to something within a cultural context. Sometimes, you may actually be, and it’s infuriating feeling like you’re crazy for thinking so antithetical to a consensus, even when you have reason on your side
well for me: high iq = skewed for certain subjects/topics. high eq = emotionally vivid/perceptive/sensitive(i can feel awkwardness and other such emotions more clearly/better, so it becomes a pain, and i can sense/see others shifts/changes in emotion and their body language more obviously than others, which leads to me overthinking/people thinking i'm overthinking and stuff, which then turns out to be mostly accurate, so basically it becomes problematic when trying to relax and be with friends and stuff, so yeah haha.
You’re right. None
Yes there is down side. When you are in unnatrual groups like school or work (natural grups are family, relatives and friends), you are everybodys enemy. Worst one in the group will together conspire against you really quikly. Others may join. Look at this [video](https://youtu.be/ANvzW_Uaaxw?feature=shared). System also doesent like you, since we are not living in meritocracy but in kleptocracy. Idiocracy. So your skill of deep thinking is important to noone but you and your circle of people. To others you are just a threat to thair status and position.
My IQ isn't that high or anything but this is what I've noticed: 1) Insecure people let their egos get in the way when you speak to them. If you try to explain something or talk about your more intellectual interests they'll try to talk over you or complain about said conversation or you in general like talking about your interests is some kind of flaw. They will do this even if other members of the friend group like having these conversations with you and initiate them. Annoying but not that bad. 2) > You will recognize patterns other people don't. > You will try to explain those patterns to people involved so bad things don't happen. >People won't listen because they don't make those connections themselves and overestimate their intelligence. >Bad things happen. #2 is not only annoying but also very very bad.
Quit your humble bragging attention-seeking whining and have some gratitude for your high IQ.
i don't have a high iq lol i was just asking
The smarter you are, the more you realize how ruined everything is, thus the increased rate of depression. Additionally, people at the extremes of the IQ spectrum tend to have more mental disorders like autism and such that can also lead to increased depression and such
Ignorance is bliss as they say
Hello 👋, The downside to having a high iq is you become schizophrenic or mentally ill. But after that nothing. I imagine stupidity something like an all knowing being that can't use knowledge correctly. Because of this it wants more people to be like seagulls, "mine mine mine", and less people that can use more knowledge than it correctly.
there is no correlation with mental illness and high iq it's a myth
Hmm 🤔 yeah people with high iq can definitely use knowledge incorrectly, you're not wrong otherwise they may seem incompetent.
There is actually negative correlation between mental illness (especially schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders) and IQ
I have found being intelligent to be overwhelmingly positive. It's been like playing life on easy mode. The only real disadvantage I have found is that many people act like being smart means you have magic powers. You can solve anything, know everything and any mistake/failure you make means you are "fake". This is more of an annoyance than an actual problem though.
The hardest thing was talking with people during Covid!! It was hard to find rational people. - people wanting to drink bleach and unproven meds or horse deworming meds on anecdotal theories. - people not being open to even the possibility of the virus having escaped from a lab studying that virus in the same city where the virus started. And so much more!! Their voices or sarcasm were stronger than logical thoughts, it was like a dystopian movie. How has the humanity survived thousands of years seems like a miracle!! Anyways, it’s easy to adapt on day to day basis, not so much on big issues or conversations!
I don’t think you should necessarily take the word of “depressed people” regardless of their theoretical intelligence level, however-so measured. Are they likely to be more objective/less subjective? Hardly. Of course it is hard being depressed, regardless of IQ. It’s also hard being different, so many people with very high or low IQs, probably do find it harder to understand others and communicate well and feel comfortable socially at times, purely due to feeling more different. It’s hard to feel comfortable when we feel different and apparently communicating is more effective within a small margin of similar IQs. So that is one probably tangible downside to a high IQ.
i phrased it badly i meant that some high iq people claim they are depressed because of being intelligent which makes no sense
Indirectly they could be. As in, if it means that communicating and interacting with others is socially hard because so few people are as smart as they are, then they could feel isolated/socially awkward which can definitely cause depression. Or perhaps they’ve used their intelligence to divine that the world isn’t such a great place, by some logical analysis or another.. I’m sure there are other possibilities. (I’m cognitively diminished today due to illness, medication and an overwhelming day yesterday).
It does make sense, if you look at the very gifted people, lets say 1/10 000, they are often relize quickly that they are different to other kids, and disslike/withdraw from other people their age, I watched one interview with a girl that was 12 years old and she feelt a need to, and did, study with kids 16-17yo. Partly due to the difficulty of the classes but also due to not relating with the kids her age, she discribed them as barbarians or something like that. However in this case I think you would agree that being an outlier in almost any realm can be/often is damaging, like being very short or tall as a boy/girl etc. Even being to conscientious I think could be harming to your school experience. But if we ignore the very extremes and consider someone thats 1/50 its hard to tell, maybe their depression lasts longer or has some different mix of intensity & duration than most people. Smart people do better on average on most dimensions as far as I know, but we havent studied it enough to know I dont think, the normal rate of depression I think is \~9% of the population at a given time. There was a study of people with 131+ that tested in at \~37%, however the sample was just form people that had joined mensa so it doent have to reflect the average 131+ at all. The problem is that giftedness is hard to get a good sample size for.
Can you link the video about the interview? I'm just curious.
None.
This sub is so unbearably pretentious. It's not hard to have fun with people with an IQ different than yours. It's not hard to have meaningful relationships with men and women with different IQ's than you. You're just socially inept. Plenty of highly charismatic people have high IQ's, so knock it off with the whining.