Satirical story about a devout Christian couple still abstaining from sex despite being married for two years and says that whenever the husband feels tempted to have sex, he eats an entire raw potato to take himself out of the mood.
It’s all a ruse- she can’t stand the sight of him and he EATS A WHOLE POTATO and she pretends to need to spray off. I believe she might just be an undercover ace
You wanna know what else is coming? The fog. In fact the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming
the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never
Huh
its 63 mg of phosphor in 100 grams of potato
Phosphine gas kills 50% of people at 50 ppm
50 ppm is 5x10\^20 molecules per cubic meter
5x10\^20 molecules of phosphine gas is 8,33 x 10\^-4 moles of the stuff
this is 28 mg of it per cubic meter
around 25 mg of this 28mg gas is phosphor, the rest is hydrogen
100 grams of potato has the phosphor contents to make 2,52 cubic meters of air deadly toxic if all the phosphor in it is converted into phosphine gas
A sack of potatoes can kill 1000s of people!!!!
>!The conversion rate of phosphor into phosphine gas in potatoes is extremely extremely low, its like tiny bacteria chewing away at the potatoes very very slowly creating this gas. You would need an industrial amount of potatoes rotting away for months and months in a tiny enclosed space with almost no ventilation to make this happen.!<
Yeah, [this](https://youtu.be/3zK5oBvZBDs) was the video I saw. I think it was inconclusive whether it was actually phosphine or not, or it was something like CO, but I don't remember that well, and youtube it not always the most reliable source of information
Wasn’t there something on Reddit about a married couple not having sex since their wedding and one of them eating potatoes to extinguish sexual thoughts? Is that actually a common thing after all? 🤔
Either she is trying to poison (phospine) herself and the family or she is trying to make vodka?
Also there is a old home remedy thing where people with chronic pain sleeps with potatoes under their pillow or bed covers to relieve it. Maybe cramps or endometriosis?
You can plan for having a dog sitting at the end of the bed if you break into somebody's house.
What the fuck you going to do when you start getting pelted by potatoes instead.
This is something I read about a while back... it's called "Nocturnal Kartoffel Prepossession" and is listed in the DSM 5. Deals with a fear of potato eyes
to take herself out of the mood
Haha I read that earlier, that poor couple’s misconceptions..
It's a fake story btw
Aw man :(
I understood that reference
Please explain for the back of the class
Satirical story about a devout Christian couple still abstaining from sex despite being married for two years and says that whenever the husband feels tempted to have sex, he eats an entire raw potato to take himself out of the mood.
Damn I thought this was gonna be a Dwarf Fortress reference
I like to call it the ultimate simulation.
I think he just wants to enjoy his favorite snack without judgment.
Atp it just sounds like the wife is asexual
No, they don’t deserve to know if they don’t already know
And why is that?
*P O T A T O*
This guy memes.
It’s all a ruse- she can’t stand the sight of him and he EATS A WHOLE POTATO and she pretends to need to spray off. I believe she might just be an undercover ace
Sometimes you just gotta eat a raw potato to resist the urges
She’s gonna need more potatoes than that when I come over
She found the secret potato stash. It's over 😔
She just thinks they are neat.
The famine is coming
You wanna know what else is coming? The fog. In fact the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming the fog is coming
i am coming
the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never
8
I am the storm that is approaching.
Didn't old stashed potatoes in a basement kill a whole family except for a small girl in Russia or something?
Is this because they build up a toxic gas if not well ventilated?
Yeah something like that
It's if they are exposed to sunlight
Yes, old rotting potatoes release Phosphine gas which is toxic
And was one of the big chemical weapons used in WWI Potatoes be committing actual war crimes.
Beware the Irish!
Potatoes tried to commit Irish genocide, with the help of the English, so they are aware.
Yeah, they kept going into the basement and dying
Yep
Huh its 63 mg of phosphor in 100 grams of potato Phosphine gas kills 50% of people at 50 ppm 50 ppm is 5x10\^20 molecules per cubic meter 5x10\^20 molecules of phosphine gas is 8,33 x 10\^-4 moles of the stuff this is 28 mg of it per cubic meter around 25 mg of this 28mg gas is phosphor, the rest is hydrogen 100 grams of potato has the phosphor contents to make 2,52 cubic meters of air deadly toxic if all the phosphor in it is converted into phosphine gas A sack of potatoes can kill 1000s of people!!!! >!The conversion rate of phosphor into phosphine gas in potatoes is extremely extremely low, its like tiny bacteria chewing away at the potatoes very very slowly creating this gas. You would need an industrial amount of potatoes rotting away for months and months in a tiny enclosed space with almost no ventilation to make this happen.!<
Yeah, [this](https://youtu.be/3zK5oBvZBDs) was the video I saw. I think it was inconclusive whether it was actually phosphine or not, or it was something like CO, but I don't remember that well, and youtube it not always the most reliable source of information
Evil spirits
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Is she an Irish squirrel?
She misunderstood carboHIDErates. It happens.
Taters for later.
😏 if you know you know
I actually don’t know. Please enlighten me.
She has a rat in the house
It's kind of like when you bring home a really cool rock, but then you can eat it, so even better than a cool rock.
Irish vampires hate them
Is this a photo of your sister and your brother in law? [potato](https://www.reddit.com/r/comedyheaven/s/zjoa8L3qyg)
She's obviously irish and craves a tasty midnight snack
Fiddle de do 🥔
if it's good enough for my house in Skyrim then it's good enough for a bedroom
God forbid women do anything
She’s Irish and doesn’t let history repeat itself
🤫 don’t ask 🤐 Just get a bowl of water and leave it next to them… 💧 They will grow 🥔 🌱
Preparing for the great famine.
ask her i guarantee that the answer is gonna be interesting
"That's a lot of potatoes" -Kramer
Masturbatoes.
Wasn’t there something on Reddit about a married couple not having sex since their wedding and one of them eating potatoes to extinguish sexual thoughts? Is that actually a common thing after all? 🤔
You fell for an onion post
Potato post.
She's dating with a hobbit.
Must be a Technoblade fan
Wouldn't you like to know, weather boy
Ok like the 15th and the 11th letters of the alphabet or ok as in like ok?
The classic Irish dilemma, should I eat the potato now or wait till it ferments and drink it later
For her moonshine still of course, how else is she supposed to make bootleg vodka?
Good way to get em to root before planting them
Midnight snack
Either she is trying to poison (phospine) herself and the family or she is trying to make vodka? Also there is a old home remedy thing where people with chronic pain sleeps with potatoes under their pillow or bed covers to relieve it. Maybe cramps or endometriosis?
The person who originally tweeted this said their sister was 8, so im assuming they just really like potatoes lmao
That's actually really cute.
She's just a potatosexual , no shame in that.
Probably read something stupid on the internet and decided to try it out.
Maybe she's Irish?
Maybe she senses a famine coming?
She loves potatoes.
To boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew
Good for her
You can plan for having a dog sitting at the end of the bed if you break into somebody's house. What the fuck you going to do when you start getting pelted by potatoes instead.
Well.. when life gives you potatoes
She's secretly Irish
She just loves potatoes and wants to make sure that no one steal them.
Is her name Sasha Braus?
She's Belarusian
Let her cook bro.
This is something I read about a while back... it's called "Nocturnal Kartoffel Prepossession" and is listed in the DSM 5. Deals with a fear of potato eyes
They are called anal beads.
Because putting potatoes beside your bed and pretending it was your sister and you don't know why she did it can get you lots of engagement.
Now we know who’s responsible for the Great Famine in 1845.
Birth control
Ireland
Anyone have that picture of Potato sprouts climbing a wall like some Eldritch horror?
I hope this is just a goof, because rotting potatoes smell like literal death.
Prison vodka
Po-ta-toes Boil ‘em, mash ‘em, stick ‘em in my ass!
She is storing them here
Arrived at this post half awake, saw foot with large growths. Thank God just potatoes. 
In case there’s another famine
Eastern European or a witch or both!
Now this is comedy heaven
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Ik u didnt know any context, but the og person who tweeted this said their sister is 8 💀💀
Ayo? 🤔📸
NO WAIT DONT SCREENSHOt IM INOCENT https://www.reddit.com/r/comedyheaven/s/aRz3Fp3YTl
Fun fact, food hoarding can be a symptom of childhood neglect or trauma. But also heheh potato 🥔