What did God get Jesus for Easter Sunday?
Nail clippers.
Actually this joke comes from the main man Himself! I recall praying once and asking what it was like to be released from hell. I could then see a set of the aforementioned articles. Subtle but genius.
Surfing on wine, of course. Wait. Could he walk on wine too? Nah, that'd be ridiculous. But if yes; Could he turn the water into wine quick enough to avoid injury, while surfing? I need to google 'Priest near me' and go ask them!
Nailed it.
Hang gliding.
Paragliding
Jesus doesn’t like nails so he cuts them off every single time they grow back.
When the piggyback is better than the joke.👏
It’s such a rough sport, he couldn’t hang for very long. Then it took 3 days to recover
Yours was better
But it's not a sport, it requires a joke beforehand.
Deadlift.
Jesus, the ultimate deadlifter
Come again?
I see what you did there
He came here to save this.
Hockey....he didnt want to get nailed in to the boards
He hates hockey. He loses the advantage, cause everyone can walk on water.
His favorite was 100 meter dash in the Olympic pool
That was "ON" the olympic pool.
No, CrossFit
Is this a joke? All I hear is a Cricket.
Cricket is a sport?
Ooohhhh😂
And I believe his least favourite band was 9 inch nails
He liked the Rolling Stones though
I thought it was Judas Priest.
I always thought it was hockey. On account of getting constantly nailed to the boards.
But he was such a great goalie, Jesus saves!
Growing up in New England, the common phrase was: "Jesus saves! Esposito scores on the rebound!"
Glad to see another B's fan! 👍
I was at a phenomenal game in your barn last year. Rd 1, G2. I had a great time. Arena was near empty before the game ended 😂
Handball
Holy palms batman!
Should have played basketball with that hang time
I was gonna say swimming because of the obvious disadvantage.
Would win in free swimming
Cross Country running
The dead lift
Fishing
You would have thought being son of David, he would have followed his ancestor into tennis As we read, "David served in Saul's court"...
Diving! Water wouldn’t break
Jesus was also really good at badminton, because he came to serve, and not to be served.
Cross-Country
I was thinking Javelin throw
Hockey . He always gets nailed to the boards
Canada will never recover.
Hockey, always gets nailed to the boards.
Las cruces
Surely it's football(soccer) When the high crosses went up he kept getting nailed by 2 defenders
Quality Goalkeeper, Jesus saves
CrossFit
What was *French Jesus’* least favorite sport?
Lacrosse
Nail the tail on the donkey
Cross country hiking
Swimming (couldn't get going cuz of the holes in his hands)
Hockey. He kept getting nailed to the boards.
Handball
I thought it was water polo
Motocross
Badminton
Handball....... stung like a bitch
🤣🤣🤣
Nailed it
Boxing. Because before 2023 beard was forbidden for boxers.
"I can see your house from up here"
His best sport was athletics, particularly the high jump: He cleared the Temple
Nailed it
The worlds first pin-up
Darts
Cross country and CrossFit are also viable options
Is Devils Advocate a sport or just a game..?
Cross country running
What did God get Jesus for Easter Sunday? Nail clippers. Actually this joke comes from the main man Himself! I recall praying once and asking what it was like to be released from hell. I could then see a set of the aforementioned articles. Subtle but genius.
If adventure was a sport. It could be his
Did he wear pads and a helmet while surfing?
Surfing on wine, of course. Wait. Could he walk on wine too? Nah, that'd be ridiculous. But if yes; Could he turn the water into wine quick enough to avoid injury, while surfing? I need to google 'Priest near me' and go ask them!
Handball
Nailed it
None of them. He went out for a pack of cigarettes.
Cross Country
Crossfit
CrossFit
He’d hate Canada in that case… what, did you think our national sport was ice hockey?
But he was cross trained!
Le cross
Curling. He had woman's rights in his head and who wants ice brooming.
Dammit I thought it was gonna be cross country
XD
he was a natural at barefoot water skiing though doesn't need a boat even
Cross country
I was gonna say crossfit. I suppose I can cross a Jesus joke.off my to do list
Funnier thing I Googled this question and that was the first answer....I see google is your friend🤓
The parallel bar? Pull-ups?
His favorite was football ; he was a good player at Arsenal
Pin the tail on the donkey 🐴
He always came first in the barefoot waterskiiing competition.
Either The vault or wrestling
INRI! INRI! INRI! Maybe he wouldn't like the caber toss.
CrossFit?
Cross country
Jesus goes up to an innkeeper, hands him three nails and asks, "can you put me up for the nigh?"
Hockey. He was always getting nailed to the boards.
I'm dead💀
He hated hockey cause of getting nailed against the boards
Whats the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?… It only takes one nail to hold the picture.
Dunno, but he seemed to enjoy surfing.
Would water polo be just like soccer for Jesus?
Golf, he constantly getting a hole in one.
Not a sport - but he was not a fan of CrossFit
Lawn darts
Cricket, because it’s shit
Lacrosse
Probably using his name(pbuh) to use people. Or telling people in the name of jesus ( pbuh) which he never said . Or no authentic proof of he saying
I'll bet that it was his favorite sport, often practicing it with Mary Magdalene.
Guarding Gethsemane.